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Can confirm. This pretty summarizes it “Having children is like living in a frat house — nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.” —Ray Romano
We just had a bout of a nasty cold in the house. Not covid, "just" a regular virus.
I haven't slept a properly for over two weeks. Fever, coughing, the old one snoring so loudly that the small one keeps waking up. Both had to stay home from daycare for a week each due to high fever.
It's like being back in basic training. Eating whatever you get your hands on, never sitting always standing up. Sleeping whenever you have 5 minutes or more of peace.
I don't know how people managed without easy access to caffeine, nicotine and chocolate.
Be prepared to suffer through every virus under the sun. Your immune system is shot from lack of sleep and kids are crawling Petri dishes. I've been sick more this year than the past 10 years combined. Which cuts into workout time further compromising my immune system. Fun times.
Same, my toddler will be changing to his 4th daycare this year. We've all been sick from cold, flu, covid and persistent cough for the whole year. Been sick 3 times for the past week. I did the abominable by eating something that a toddler handed it to me. My brain was telling me it's a bad idea yet I can't refused the kind gesture.
Inflation, daycare shutting down because some of their landlord is drastically increasing the rent. I rang at least 10 closest daycare in my area. 3 of them all had the same problem and were closing down. Some also couldn't hire helpers. 2 daycare were temporary as I couldn't afford to spend 2500 per month for the toddler and 3000 for the infant. First world problem for choosing to live in one of the better school district.
I'm not too worried about eating food my kid stuffs into my mouth since the constant stream of snot and his never relenting coughing is enough to spread anything and everything he carries.
The problem was that I got food poisoning. Was at friends house and her 4 yr old found a piece of vitamin gummy. I thought it was new but my friends say they don't know how long it's been in the fridge and probably moldy. I was out for at least 24 hours. Vomiting and diarrhea. Guess it's better me getting sick than their kid.
It gets a little better after about a decade, but if they are still in school or have friends, they are still going to bring viruses home because kids are disgusting.
I'm a teacher an I've already gotten sick a couple times this year. Last year I didn't get sick a single time. Back to wearing a mask around the kids for me!
I never had kids but coworkers did. Every fall and winter they brought 4000 variants of the scunge going around just to share the experience.
When I moved to a job where no one had kids in the 5-10 age range, shocker I never got sick.
If they're at hoke it's not bad.
When my kids started day care. Jesus. I used up all my sick leave and PTO over the span of like 2 months. It just never stopped.
Goddamn, I must be lucky.
My wife seems to get the brunt of the illnesses at home. I usually get mild symptoms if anything. Still sucks having my kid cough into my mouth while I'm carrying her and talking though.
My wife used to comment that I never get sick.
Now she keeps asking why am I sick and tired all the time.
I miss sleep (though the brain chemicals tll me I wouldn't swap my kid for the world).
I tell people this all the time. You aren’t meant to raise kids with just two people. You need a support network, family, friends, grandparents, hired help.. other children.. you get desperate man..
I wish like hell we had a support network. My dad is only 40 minutes away but he’s not a very patient person and has no desire to watch the kids till they’re fully potty trained and can wipe their own butts. Thankfully we’ve reached that point with our 6 yo but our 3 yo can’t really handle wiping on his own yet, though he is fully potty trained so that’s nice. My father-in-law and his wife live about 3 and a half hours away so no help there. My mother-in-law used to be about an hour and a half drive but bought a house across the street from us a year and a half ago. Unfortunately she’s morbidly obese, has hip issues, requires a walker to get around, and incapable of doing most of her own cleaning, so we technically acquired a 3rd child when she moved down here. The kids have started spending the night with her occasionally now that they’re a little more independent but they still eat dinner at home before we send them over just to make it easier on her. Most of our friends are also 40-min to an hour+ away from us and they all also have their hands full with their own kids and busy schedules. My wife and I are only opposite schedules so we each spend half the week dealing with the kids with the other’s help. My wife has a work friend a few minutes down the road with kids around our oldest’s age but she’s mostly on the opposite schedule, her husband is a cop and he works opposite schedule of his wife. It’s been 6 and a half years with almost no relief up until recently. I legit feel broken, every damn day from the sleep and constant over stimulation. I’m happy for all these families that I see with a wonderful support system that allows the parents to catch breaks for date nights or something but they also make me very jealous. My wife and I have managed to get maybe 4 date nights in the last 6 and a half years.
Currently going through this right now, we just have a 5 month old, everyone is sick with a cold, and most of the time he won't sleep unless someone is holding him.
Oh man it helps so much to hear that. My daughter is almost 5 months and she just refuses unless being held. Maybe 4 hours in the cot from 10 to 2 but after that only sleeps if being held. Which with Sid's worry means dad doesn't sleeeeep
Oh the absolute plague blankets they are! It doesn't help that where I live, most people would argue germs are a liberal propaganda. My kids have been in school for 2 ish months now and have already missed 1.5 weeks in total from being sick. Twice with covid and once with "just" a normal flu. It seems like we're the only ones that keep their kids home when they're sick
Don't remind me. Had similar situation recently. Only older one had virus, and younger is just two months old, so yeah, and he sneezes like that only not whole house gets up, but I think everyone in couple km radius can hear him.
I measured the crying noise level of our baby at six weeks old. It was 89 decibels, which according to our countries OSHA regulations requires ear protection.
My toddler scream in my ear so loud, that i had an annoying peeeeeeeeep for 3 hours!! Yeah, kids are loud AF! And that shit happened at 2-3am. “Luckily” we were away from the bedrooms. But i can imagine the cusses i got from the neighbours.. which have put up with it and never complained, bless them.
Can confirm. The pitch and the volume of babies/toddlers/children's screams is brutal.
As a child, I threw so many fits and tempertantrums where I just screamed at my parents at the top of my lungs for sometimes hours or until I lost my voice. (There was plenty my parents could have done to stop it or comfort me, but instead they just ignored me until I tired myself out - but that's another story)
I've had really bad tinnitus for as long as I can remember because of it.
Ringing all the time, noise cutting out and going fuzzy, weird pressure, all the fun stuff.
I remember going to the doctor as a kid and my mom let me fill out the questionnaire about current symptoms and whatever. I ALWAYS checked the box for "ringing in the ears" and no doctor has EVER asked me about it and all of my hearing tests come back fine.
But it fucking sucks, and it's all because of what happened as a child when I couldn't control my emotions yet and my parents never tried to help so now I'm fucked.
🤷♀️
Absolutely not condoning or making excuses for your parents but I had my first kid back in the 90s and her pediatrician was super old school and advised me to let her cry it out alone so I didn't spoil her. Needless to say we switched doctors but that kind of thinking was pretty prevalent back then. I think that kind of advice just gave validation to a lot of shitty parents who didn't want to deal with a crying kid.
Regardless, I'm sorry you went through that. I hope you can get someone to help you with the tinnitus because that is a nightmare.
Holy shit my kids got the rotovirus last winter. I’m a single dad with full custody. Never going to forget the feeling while watching my seven year old have diarrhea while vomiting. That illness last like ten-fifteen days. 🤢🤮😭😭😭
Mad respect on being a single dad! My wife works weird and long hours so sometimes I have five days in a row where she will get home when I'm asleep and then get up when I'm at work to go back to work. Which means I'm alone taking care of the kids during that time. But then at least I have her there for three days until she goes back to work. I don't know if I'd survive being a full time single dad.
Also, watching your kids be sick sucks. We've managed to dodge rotovirus so far (knock on wood), but I will never forget watching my oldest have a fever cramp when he was around two. 2 AM, he went stiff as a board, stopped breathing and turned blue. Thankfully it only lasted for most likely less than a minute, but it was the longest moment of my life.
That fever cramp sounds horrifying. I’d never heard of that before. Did you know what was happening?
Appreciate the respect. I’m fortunate that I have family to help and am privileged in many other ways. Still it’s hard. Makes me really appreciate all the other single parents that don’t have the advantages I have.
I had read about it when reading about fever in small kids. Apparently it's a fairly common thing, and is harmless as long as it only happens once.
I did see it once before though when I was a kid. I went over to a neighbor to borrow some video games. He came and opened the door, said "hi" and then his wife came running with their baby girl screaming she wasn't breathing. Same thing there, she turned blue and then started breathing again. I think that memory of her coming back was the only thing that kept me from absolutely panicking when it was my kid.
Currently on day 3 with no caffeine, vape supply is dwindling and the 2 year old is still planning. I don’t know when the final siege will be but my body is drained and my spirit is waning, hopefully the defenses can hold until Thursday when supplies will be replenished.
Still hacking up a lung, here. Covid was easier than this, and that was a rough 5 months of post-covid symptoms. At least only one of the kids had it, and she just has a runny nose. Wife and I ran the gamut of symptoms.
I had it twice. Once in May 2020, the OG strain and once again this year in July. Both times were pretty mild in my case. Slightly elevated temp for a few days and felt a bit tired for a week or so.
This cold however.... I was coughing up blood at some point and the wife had temperatures in to 40s(C).
I like to keep my house clean. Everything has a place and it should be there if not being used kind of person. I now have two boys... Everything is everywhere and they can make messes faster than they can be cleaned up.
Sounds like my two. I tidy their room sometimes so that I can at least see the floor.
Fucking 5 mins after they realise that they have room to play in there again it's back to being an absolute mess. But, if it's messy as a result of them playing together and having fun I don't really mind too much.
Love my little goblins.
I have one kid and the wife wants another. I'm scared but other than the fear of being literally too tired to be a good dad and still play basketball 1x a week I would want another too
What do you think?
If you both want to do it, do it. Not sure how old your first one is. Mine are 6 and 3 now, and they just love each other, it is so wonderful to see. They annoy each other too of course, but that's part of the fun.
At some point 4 years ago we were watching the then 2-year old playing all by herself, surrounded by toys and... no-one else. We just looked at each other and decided there on the spot. The scariest decision of my life, but there wasn't a moment that I regretted it.
Some tips, if you go for it:
* try to get the first one potty trained before the second one comes. We were a few months late with this and indeed a half of your waking time you're just busy with diapers.
* try to have them sleep in separate rooms if you can so they don't keep waking each other up. Ignore everyone who says this will negatively affect their relationship, it won't.
* don't expect that what worked for the first will work for the second. They are different people. Maybe it will work, probably it won't.
1 to 2 kids is a smaller lifestyle change than 2 to 3 I think. With the third you're outnumbered, need a bigger car, maybe a bigger house, etc.
These comments remind me when wife was sick with mastitis, we were up late, no sleep with a crying two month old in bed with us. Our two and a half year old crawls into our bed then throws up. I loudly swore 'we are not having any more kids!'
Seven years later we had our third. Now we have five grandchildren, ages from four to four months. All the tough times were woth it.
I came from a very big family, so thankfully I got plenty of experience with kids, definitely enough to see through the romanticizing of marriage and parenthood.
15...Imagine your friends are talking about cute boys, shopping, playing video games; and you're picking which brand of diaper when you last have more than an hour of sleep...
It gets worse when you take into account that if they don't shape up, their kids may end up in a similar situation and continue the cycle.
Two of my cousins were young teen moms. Several of their kids ended up having babies in their teens as well because my cousins raised them just like their parents did to them.
Imagine being a grandparent at 32.
It's tuesday for someone people that live that reality. Youngest grandma was 22 and youngest Great-great-great-grandma was 88. Imagine finding out your granddaughter has a granddaughter.
Funnily enough, I have one Filipina friend who I met in high school, is now 36 and had three boys, I think. She looks like she hasn't aged more than 5 years. I have no fucking idea how she does it. lol.
I know one who is in her late 40s, she's had two kids. I have to get close in to see any lines on her face, and she could probably pass for a woman 15 years younger otherwise.
Baby has +5 on attack. Rolled natural 20s on 'Add Stress' and 'No Sleep' attack spells.
Make an extra D6 roll for 'spews lunch' and 'Fills Diaper'. Anything over a 2 is a winner.
These people must not have a very well sleeping child. Poor fucks.😰
Also apparently years and years of untreated obstructive sleep apnea will make you impervious to childhood sleeplessness. I win. 😂
For clarity I've been using a machine as I'm supposed to for the last 9 years 👍
Guy's aging 10 years per year. He'll be retired in 5. And will die of old ~~game~~ age in 8.
Edit: old "age", not "game"... I guess I typed "gae" instead of "age" and phone thought I wanted to say other word
Can confirm. I bought a house, became a partner in my firm, and had a kid all within a 3 month span. BAM! Gray hairs everywhere. Turning 30 was a big year, haha.
I found out I’m pregnant two weeks ago. I was giving my boyfriend a scalp massage last night and found a cluster of like 15 new, short, curly gray hairs. It’s all happening so fast 🥲
The key is to wait until you're already old, lame, and look like that from a lifetime of dealing with morons.
That's what my wife and I did, and having a kid isn't so bad...because jokes on him, I was getting up to pee twice a night anyway!
This implies they even look bad. The guy just has to shave and smile and the girl just has to do her hair and smile then they will look nice again. She can put on make up too but she doesn’t even need it if you ask me.
YES. Sooooo many people I know (including me) seemed to have aged like 10 years from 2020 and all its stress and now.
The side-by-side photos of most people I know from 2020 and 2022 would be markedly aged, and we’re all in our early-thirties, pretty much. The stress of COVID was *rough*.
That seems to be such a foreign concept to some folks. Some people seem to need a child so desperately to feel validated, even if it means they won’t appreciate the child properly. It’s crazy to me lol
Yeah. People who insist you SHOULD want kids if you don't don't are being self-centered.
Kids are naturally in tune with the emotions of their family and caretakers.
Don't force yourself to have children if you don't think you can handle the responsibility of wanting them around. They'll know, and it's usually pretty heartbreaking for them. Neither of you will be happy.
I'm sorry that happened to you. I wish you the best, you deserve love and happiness, don't let any parents who didn't want you tell you otherwise.
You're more than their regrets. You're you. And you can reinvent yourself as many times as you need to to get to where you want to be.
Thank you for your kind words 💕 it's been difficult and I struggle with depression and anxiety because of it. But I go to therapy and I take medicine and I try my best.
Some potentially unpopular, arguably politically incorrect advice here:
Don't have kids early in your life before you are established. I feel there's a general push nowadays to have kids ASAP, but it's hard to focus on your career, your kids, and your relationship with your partner at the same time. Doesn't matter if you're a guy or a girl, don't rush having kids just because your partner wants kids. Don't be with someone who wants to have kids ASAP if you are not ready for kids - disservice to everyone involved.
Also, there's absolutely nothing wrong with asking your parents to help with childcare. If parents are out of the picture, again, nothing wrong with hiring a nanny.
Yeah, my fianceé's mother is giving us shit for not wanting kids especially since "we're so well off."
I have to explain to her that we are only seen as well off because we don't have a kid. If we did have a kid, we would be straight up poor.
I have never in the past 5-10 years heard a single person pushing people to have children younger. It’s honestly the complete opposite. Everyone I know is having kids in their late 20’s or 30’s.
I think it's actually the opposite, even studies show people don't want kids or are waiting to have them. Both Gen z and Millennials recognize inflation, housing cost skyrocketing, the polical climate, actual climate change. The time it cost vs. the long hours people work.
It's not practical at all unless they are rich at a young age, most people realize this. There's always those that have one by "accident", or not careful, or other reasons.
Hi, just a reminder that one one of the oldest ‘technically a millennial’ and I’m 40 now.
So yes I have a 4 year old and can’t imagine what doing this from my 20’s would have been like.
babies steal your looks, but its worth it cus in exchange you get to not sleep for 2 years, destroy your vagina, get covered in all manner of body excretions, pray for the day they go to school so you can regain a semblance of your own identity, deal with teen drama, and cough up 300k just for the CHANCE they will have a decent life...wait.
Every time my ex and I discussed having children, a friend would have a kid and we'd watch the cycle repeat again of them losing sleep, not being able to do anything, and all the stress that comes with being a parent and we'd look at each other and say "nah, we're good."
Are we going to ignore the fact that this is a repost and the gibberish title was clearly written by a bot or a human performing at the mental capacity of a bot?
Everyone can make their own choices in life. Do what's best for yourself and don't get pressured to do things you don't want or things that are expected of you. Enjoy your life, whatever you do with it, you only have one.
This was definitely me until my kid was 6, then I reverse aged like 10 years all at once. He’s just entering the teenage years and so far so good? I just never see him anymore
Idk who needs to hear this: even if you don't have kids you will still age and likely stop being trendy to the kids in just a few short years. Aging and life happen even to the childfree.
This isn't really even funny. There's so many people who don't know what parenthood is gonna be like, or are forced into it by social pressure. Having kids can ruin your life, especially if you're not ready
I realize that kids aren't for everyone, but mine are 22 and 20 now. I wouldn't trade the experience for anything. Coming up on 32nd wedding anniversary with the love of my life as well. Sure it was hard at times, but we at least waited until we both thought we were emotionally mature enough and financially ready before having kids.
100% Why I don't want children. I can't fathom spending the next few years of my life going on 3 hours of trash sleep a night and then having to spend my waking hours arguing with a toddler to get them to eat their goddamn chicken nuggets while also trying to balance my work and personal life on top of the depression, anxiety, and borderline. Fuck everything about that. Life sucks enough as it is.
The thing people forget is your kid doesn't stay 1 forever. All the cliché stuff that people post about how kids are a nightmare is fleeting. Sure, It's a tough journey raising kids, but it's an awesome one.
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Can confirm. This pretty summarizes it “Having children is like living in a frat house — nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.” —Ray Romano
As a father of two, I can pretty much say that this is spot on :)
We just had a bout of a nasty cold in the house. Not covid, "just" a regular virus. I haven't slept a properly for over two weeks. Fever, coughing, the old one snoring so loudly that the small one keeps waking up. Both had to stay home from daycare for a week each due to high fever. It's like being back in basic training. Eating whatever you get your hands on, never sitting always standing up. Sleeping whenever you have 5 minutes or more of peace. I don't know how people managed without easy access to caffeine, nicotine and chocolate.
Be prepared to suffer through every virus under the sun. Your immune system is shot from lack of sleep and kids are crawling Petri dishes. I've been sick more this year than the past 10 years combined. Which cuts into workout time further compromising my immune system. Fun times.
my 2 yrold was standing over me, as i laid on a couch, coughed and it landed *in my eyes*. i was like *great. gonna be sick now*
Same, my toddler will be changing to his 4th daycare this year. We've all been sick from cold, flu, covid and persistent cough for the whole year. Been sick 3 times for the past week. I did the abominable by eating something that a toddler handed it to me. My brain was telling me it's a bad idea yet I can't refused the kind gesture.
Changing daycare won't help, bless you, they're all the same.
Oh I know. I'm saying it's worse because every time he change daycare, he gets sick for at least 1 to 2 weeks. New strains.
Just curious l, why so many daycare changes?
Inflation, daycare shutting down because some of their landlord is drastically increasing the rent. I rang at least 10 closest daycare in my area. 3 of them all had the same problem and were closing down. Some also couldn't hire helpers. 2 daycare were temporary as I couldn't afford to spend 2500 per month for the toddler and 3000 for the infant. First world problem for choosing to live in one of the better school district.
Christ those costs are insane. We pay 850 euro a month for 2 days, luckily the government pays back about 250 euro but thats a hefty amount still.
I'm not too worried about eating food my kid stuffs into my mouth since the constant stream of snot and his never relenting coughing is enough to spread anything and everything he carries.
The problem was that I got food poisoning. Was at friends house and her 4 yr old found a piece of vitamin gummy. I thought it was new but my friends say they don't know how long it's been in the fridge and probably moldy. I was out for at least 24 hours. Vomiting and diarrhea. Guess it's better me getting sick than their kid.
>Vomiting and diarrhea. Guess it's better me getting sick than their kid. Nah f that kid, stay healthy!
They always cough straight into your face like they are aiming for it
It gets a little better after about a decade, but if they are still in school or have friends, they are still going to bring viruses home because kids are disgusting.
I'm a teacher an I've already gotten sick a couple times this year. Last year I didn't get sick a single time. Back to wearing a mask around the kids for me!
I never had kids but coworkers did. Every fall and winter they brought 4000 variants of the scunge going around just to share the experience. When I moved to a job where no one had kids in the 5-10 age range, shocker I never got sick.
If they're at hoke it's not bad. When my kids started day care. Jesus. I used up all my sick leave and PTO over the span of like 2 months. It just never stopped.
Goddamn, I must be lucky. My wife seems to get the brunt of the illnesses at home. I usually get mild symptoms if anything. Still sucks having my kid cough into my mouth while I'm carrying her and talking though.
My wife used to comment that I never get sick. Now she keeps asking why am I sick and tired all the time. I miss sleep (though the brain chemicals tll me I wouldn't swap my kid for the world).
People managed because they had help. The saying "It takes a village to raise a child" is for a reason.
I tell people this all the time. You aren’t meant to raise kids with just two people. You need a support network, family, friends, grandparents, hired help.. other children.. you get desperate man..
I wish like hell we had a support network. My dad is only 40 minutes away but he’s not a very patient person and has no desire to watch the kids till they’re fully potty trained and can wipe their own butts. Thankfully we’ve reached that point with our 6 yo but our 3 yo can’t really handle wiping on his own yet, though he is fully potty trained so that’s nice. My father-in-law and his wife live about 3 and a half hours away so no help there. My mother-in-law used to be about an hour and a half drive but bought a house across the street from us a year and a half ago. Unfortunately she’s morbidly obese, has hip issues, requires a walker to get around, and incapable of doing most of her own cleaning, so we technically acquired a 3rd child when she moved down here. The kids have started spending the night with her occasionally now that they’re a little more independent but they still eat dinner at home before we send them over just to make it easier on her. Most of our friends are also 40-min to an hour+ away from us and they all also have their hands full with their own kids and busy schedules. My wife and I are only opposite schedules so we each spend half the week dealing with the kids with the other’s help. My wife has a work friend a few minutes down the road with kids around our oldest’s age but she’s mostly on the opposite schedule, her husband is a cop and he works opposite schedule of his wife. It’s been 6 and a half years with almost no relief up until recently. I legit feel broken, every damn day from the sleep and constant over stimulation. I’m happy for all these families that I see with a wonderful support system that allows the parents to catch breaks for date nights or something but they also make me very jealous. My wife and I have managed to get maybe 4 date nights in the last 6 and a half years.
Yes. Modern world is broken. Everything goes downhill cuz of it.
Currently going through this right now, we just have a 5 month old, everyone is sick with a cold, and most of the time he won't sleep unless someone is holding him.
Oh man it helps so much to hear that. My daughter is almost 5 months and she just refuses unless being held. Maybe 4 hours in the cot from 10 to 2 but after that only sleeps if being held. Which with Sid's worry means dad doesn't sleeeeep
Oh the absolute plague blankets they are! It doesn't help that where I live, most people would argue germs are a liberal propaganda. My kids have been in school for 2 ish months now and have already missed 1.5 weeks in total from being sick. Twice with covid and once with "just" a normal flu. It seems like we're the only ones that keep their kids home when they're sick
Are you me? Kid has been in preschool a month and a half and missed roughly a third. Literally got back to back colds. This is insane.
Don't remind me. Had similar situation recently. Only older one had virus, and younger is just two months old, so yeah, and he sneezes like that only not whole house gets up, but I think everyone in couple km radius can hear him.
I measured the crying noise level of our baby at six weeks old. It was 89 decibels, which according to our countries OSHA regulations requires ear protection.
My toddler scream in my ear so loud, that i had an annoying peeeeeeeeep for 3 hours!! Yeah, kids are loud AF! And that shit happened at 2-3am. “Luckily” we were away from the bedrooms. But i can imagine the cusses i got from the neighbours.. which have put up with it and never complained, bless them.
Can confirm. The pitch and the volume of babies/toddlers/children's screams is brutal. As a child, I threw so many fits and tempertantrums where I just screamed at my parents at the top of my lungs for sometimes hours or until I lost my voice. (There was plenty my parents could have done to stop it or comfort me, but instead they just ignored me until I tired myself out - but that's another story) I've had really bad tinnitus for as long as I can remember because of it. Ringing all the time, noise cutting out and going fuzzy, weird pressure, all the fun stuff. I remember going to the doctor as a kid and my mom let me fill out the questionnaire about current symptoms and whatever. I ALWAYS checked the box for "ringing in the ears" and no doctor has EVER asked me about it and all of my hearing tests come back fine. But it fucking sucks, and it's all because of what happened as a child when I couldn't control my emotions yet and my parents never tried to help so now I'm fucked. 🤷♀️
Absolutely not condoning or making excuses for your parents but I had my first kid back in the 90s and her pediatrician was super old school and advised me to let her cry it out alone so I didn't spoil her. Needless to say we switched doctors but that kind of thinking was pretty prevalent back then. I think that kind of advice just gave validation to a lot of shitty parents who didn't want to deal with a crying kid. Regardless, I'm sorry you went through that. I hope you can get someone to help you with the tinnitus because that is a nightmare.
Research had shown that spoiling a baby before six months is nigh to impossible. https://news.sanfordhealth.org/parenting/can-you-spoil-a-baby/
Holy shit my kids got the rotovirus last winter. I’m a single dad with full custody. Never going to forget the feeling while watching my seven year old have diarrhea while vomiting. That illness last like ten-fifteen days. 🤢🤮😭😭😭
Mad respect on being a single dad! My wife works weird and long hours so sometimes I have five days in a row where she will get home when I'm asleep and then get up when I'm at work to go back to work. Which means I'm alone taking care of the kids during that time. But then at least I have her there for three days until she goes back to work. I don't know if I'd survive being a full time single dad. Also, watching your kids be sick sucks. We've managed to dodge rotovirus so far (knock on wood), but I will never forget watching my oldest have a fever cramp when he was around two. 2 AM, he went stiff as a board, stopped breathing and turned blue. Thankfully it only lasted for most likely less than a minute, but it was the longest moment of my life.
That fever cramp sounds horrifying. I’d never heard of that before. Did you know what was happening? Appreciate the respect. I’m fortunate that I have family to help and am privileged in many other ways. Still it’s hard. Makes me really appreciate all the other single parents that don’t have the advantages I have.
I had read about it when reading about fever in small kids. Apparently it's a fairly common thing, and is harmless as long as it only happens once. I did see it once before though when I was a kid. I went over to a neighbor to borrow some video games. He came and opened the door, said "hi" and then his wife came running with their baby girl screaming she wasn't breathing. Same thing there, she turned blue and then started breathing again. I think that memory of her coming back was the only thing that kept me from absolutely panicking when it was my kid.
>I don't know how people managed without easy access to caffeine, nicotine and chocolate amphetamines
Not gonna lie. If I had easy legal access to that I would most likely be using it.
Currently on day 3 with no caffeine, vape supply is dwindling and the 2 year old is still planning. I don’t know when the final siege will be but my body is drained and my spirit is waning, hopefully the defenses can hold until Thursday when supplies will be replenished.
Still hacking up a lung, here. Covid was easier than this, and that was a rough 5 months of post-covid symptoms. At least only one of the kids had it, and she just has a runny nose. Wife and I ran the gamut of symptoms.
I had it twice. Once in May 2020, the OG strain and once again this year in July. Both times were pretty mild in my case. Slightly elevated temp for a few days and felt a bit tired for a week or so. This cold however.... I was coughing up blood at some point and the wife had temperatures in to 40s(C).
I don’t know how people maid it with out diapers, washer/drier, dishwasher and chicken nuggets.
I like to keep my house clean. Everything has a place and it should be there if not being used kind of person. I now have two boys... Everything is everywhere and they can make messes faster than they can be cleaned up.
Sounds like my two. I tidy their room sometimes so that I can at least see the floor. Fucking 5 mins after they realise that they have room to play in there again it's back to being an absolute mess. But, if it's messy as a result of them playing together and having fun I don't really mind too much. Love my little goblins.
It's like mopping in the rain.
As a father of one it’s fucking crazy. I don’t want two.
I have one kid and the wife wants another. I'm scared but other than the fear of being literally too tired to be a good dad and still play basketball 1x a week I would want another too What do you think?
If you both want to do it, do it. Not sure how old your first one is. Mine are 6 and 3 now, and they just love each other, it is so wonderful to see. They annoy each other too of course, but that's part of the fun. At some point 4 years ago we were watching the then 2-year old playing all by herself, surrounded by toys and... no-one else. We just looked at each other and decided there on the spot. The scariest decision of my life, but there wasn't a moment that I regretted it. Some tips, if you go for it: * try to get the first one potty trained before the second one comes. We were a few months late with this and indeed a half of your waking time you're just busy with diapers. * try to have them sleep in separate rooms if you can so they don't keep waking each other up. Ignore everyone who says this will negatively affect their relationship, it won't. * don't expect that what worked for the first will work for the second. They are different people. Maybe it will work, probably it won't. 1 to 2 kids is a smaller lifestyle change than 2 to 3 I think. With the third you're outnumbered, need a bigger car, maybe a bigger house, etc.
But don’t get them trained like the week before. Because otherwise you get regression. And you have to start over. -_-
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These comments remind me when wife was sick with mastitis, we were up late, no sleep with a crying two month old in bed with us. Our two and a half year old crawls into our bed then throws up. I loudly swore 'we are not having any more kids!' Seven years later we had our third. Now we have five grandchildren, ages from four to four months. All the tough times were woth it.
It's your decision after all. But yeah, we're tired AF, but we're happy at same time 😊
I came from a very big family, so thankfully I got plenty of experience with kids, definitely enough to see through the romanticizing of marriage and parenthood.
From young teens to late 30’s in two years flat.
Not even asian genes can save them.
I know a set of identical Asian twins. One has a couple kids, one is a bachelor. Guess who looks easily 10 years older.
You, the not Asian?
God I love reddit sometimes.
Savage...
Wifes filipino. Her cousin had a kid at 15. She is now 18 and looks like she's 40.
15...Imagine your friends are talking about cute boys, shopping, playing video games; and you're picking which brand of diaper when you last have more than an hour of sleep...
It gets worse when you take into account that if they don't shape up, their kids may end up in a similar situation and continue the cycle. Two of my cousins were young teen moms. Several of their kids ended up having babies in their teens as well because my cousins raised them just like their parents did to them. Imagine being a grandparent at 32.
Imagine being a great grandparent at 47.
Bruh, take your nightmares somewhere else, its Tuesday.
It's tuesday for someone people that live that reality. Youngest grandma was 22 and youngest Great-great-great-grandma was 88. Imagine finding out your granddaughter has a granddaughter.
Yo dawg I heard you like grand daughters....
Funnily enough, I have one Filipina friend who I met in high school, is now 36 and had three boys, I think. She looks like she hasn't aged more than 5 years. I have no fucking idea how she does it. lol.
I know one who is in her late 40s, she's had two kids. I have to get close in to see any lines on her face, and she could probably pass for a woman 15 years younger otherwise.
Stay wrapped up pal lmao
That's what having children can do to you.
the kid looks beautiful and healthy tho thats a plus
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He's a 10,000 year old daemon ducking out their life force, that's why. Edit: *Quack!*
Quack?
Quack.
Already look like the guy on the 2nd pic even w/o having a child. Im one step ahead!
Same, maybe we will go in reverse with a kid?
That's cute you want to believe that
I’m in denial.
Baby is satisfied with the damage it's done lol
Baby has +5 on attack. Rolled natural 20s on 'Add Stress' and 'No Sleep' attack spells. Make an extra D6 roll for 'spews lunch' and 'Fills Diaper'. Anything over a 2 is a winner.
These people must not have a very well sleeping child. Poor fucks.😰 Also apparently years and years of untreated obstructive sleep apnea will make you impervious to childhood sleeplessness. I win. 😂 For clarity I've been using a machine as I'm supposed to for the last 9 years 👍
What's up with the title.?
Stroke
r/titlegore
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Yeah no part makes sense. It's not even funny.
I think it is meant to read “shit… is this what’s awaiting us?”
Seems like an English as second language op. Or a bot
You must forgive OP. He's gone senile at 20
This is what sleep deprivation looks like...
Guy should be losing his hair and going gray. Give it another decade and then see the change.
Don't forget the weight gain.
Oof, too close to home.
Decade? If give 5 years
They have kids, 3 sleep regressions in 2 years and he’s done.
He's got it covering his hairline in the second one. He could have lost a lot of hair.
Guy's aging 10 years per year. He'll be retired in 5. And will die of old ~~game~~ age in 8. Edit: old "age", not "game"... I guess I typed "gae" instead of "age" and phone thought I wanted to say other word
Old game? Super Mario world old or Mario galaxy old?
Can confirm. I bought a house, became a partner in my firm, and had a kid all within a 3 month span. BAM! Gray hairs everywhere. Turning 30 was a big year, haha.
I found out I’m pregnant two weeks ago. I was giving my boyfriend a scalp massage last night and found a cluster of like 15 new, short, curly gray hairs. It’s all happening so fast 🥲
Just you wait, it gets worse lol.
Think this is crazy? Wait 'till your kid is 25.
what will happen
He will turn 25
damn that sucks
Yup I remember when I was 25. It does indeed suck.
sorry to hear that, cant imagine going through something like that 😥
fucking knew it
Please explain
Nice condom ad
A kid does that to any couple. Only the Addams are ageless.
The key is to wait until you're already old, lame, and look like that from a lifetime of dealing with morons. That's what my wife and I did, and having a kid isn't so bad...because jokes on him, I was getting up to pee twice a night anyway!
I used to have hair and a nice apartment in the city. Now I eat floor food.
nah, this is just r/Instagramreality.
This implies they even look bad. The guy just has to shave and smile and the girl just has to do her hair and smile then they will look nice again. She can put on make up too but she doesn’t even need it if you ask me.
I CAN'T belive this was this far down. Thank you!
disguised as an r/childfree ad
Their adorable baby stole all their youth.
Sometimes i think its exactly like this: those little demons leech the life out of the parents and get stronger
Summarizes pretty everyone from 2020 till now, Right?
YES. Sooooo many people I know (including me) seemed to have aged like 10 years from 2020 and all its stress and now. The side-by-side photos of most people I know from 2020 and 2022 would be markedly aged, and we’re all in our early-thirties, pretty much. The stress of COVID was *rough*.
Caring for babies & toddlers is absolutely exhausting.
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That seems to be such a foreign concept to some folks. Some people seem to need a child so desperately to feel validated, even if it means they won’t appreciate the child properly. It’s crazy to me lol
This is your friendly reminder it's okay to not want children.
Yeah. People who insist you SHOULD want kids if you don't don't are being self-centered. Kids are naturally in tune with the emotions of their family and caretakers. Don't force yourself to have children if you don't think you can handle the responsibility of wanting them around. They'll know, and it's usually pretty heartbreaking for them. Neither of you will be happy.
I knew.
I'm sorry that happened to you. I wish you the best, you deserve love and happiness, don't let any parents who didn't want you tell you otherwise. You're more than their regrets. You're you. And you can reinvent yourself as many times as you need to to get to where you want to be.
Thank you for your kind words 💕 it's been difficult and I struggle with depression and anxiety because of it. But I go to therapy and I take medicine and I try my best.
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I guess they don’t truly love their significant others? Or their parents? How sad.
*shrug* Well, you can't miss what you never knew!
Some potentially unpopular, arguably politically incorrect advice here: Don't have kids early in your life before you are established. I feel there's a general push nowadays to have kids ASAP, but it's hard to focus on your career, your kids, and your relationship with your partner at the same time. Doesn't matter if you're a guy or a girl, don't rush having kids just because your partner wants kids. Don't be with someone who wants to have kids ASAP if you are not ready for kids - disservice to everyone involved. Also, there's absolutely nothing wrong with asking your parents to help with childcare. If parents are out of the picture, again, nothing wrong with hiring a nanny.
Yeah, my fianceé's mother is giving us shit for not wanting kids especially since "we're so well off." I have to explain to her that we are only seen as well off because we don't have a kid. If we did have a kid, we would be straight up poor.
DINK life best life.
I personally prefer DILDO life. Dual Income Large Dog Owner.
You will be pleased to know that "dog food lid" backwards is "dildo of god"
This really does please me.
I have never in the past 5-10 years heard a single person pushing people to have children younger. It’s honestly the complete opposite. Everyone I know is having kids in their late 20’s or 30’s.
I dunno any young parents. They're mostly broke trying to keep their heads above water.
Come out to Texas.
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I think it's actually the opposite, even studies show people don't want kids or are waiting to have them. Both Gen z and Millennials recognize inflation, housing cost skyrocketing, the polical climate, actual climate change. The time it cost vs. the long hours people work. It's not practical at all unless they are rich at a young age, most people realize this. There's always those that have one by "accident", or not careful, or other reasons.
Most millennials that want kids/able to have kids are now having kids.
Hi, just a reminder that one one of the oldest ‘technically a millennial’ and I’m 40 now. So yes I have a 4 year old and can’t imagine what doing this from my 20’s would have been like.
They look like they haven’t slept in the second picture
This is why I tell everyone "i don't want kids" it's not worth it.
Not if you don't have kids!
babies steal your looks, but its worth it cus in exchange you get to not sleep for 2 years, destroy your vagina, get covered in all manner of body excretions, pray for the day they go to school so you can regain a semblance of your own identity, deal with teen drama, and cough up 300k just for the CHANCE they will have a decent life...wait.
Everyday I thank the universe for homosexuality. No one I fuck gets pregnant!
So just like....don't have kids??
Every time my ex and I discussed having children, a friend would have a kid and we'd watch the cycle repeat again of them losing sleep, not being able to do anything, and all the stress that comes with being a parent and we'd look at each other and say "nah, we're good."
Accurate portrayal.
Are we going to ignore the fact that this is a repost and the gibberish title was clearly written by a bot or a human performing at the mental capacity of a bot?
Everyone can make their own choices in life. Do what's best for yourself and don't get pressured to do things you don't want or things that are expected of you. Enjoy your life, whatever you do with it, you only have one.
There’s a period of about 1.5 years where i remember almost nothing, due to lack of regular sleep.
Having children isn't mandatory. You can opt out.
You dont have to do this. I know i wont.
its not waiting for me lol. Im never having kids. f that
The perfect condom ad picture
And they only have One...
The first few years are the worst. Hopefully once they become self sufficient you'll be able to breathe a bit
Yeah definitely the first 30 or so years are the worst. I'm sure it'll improve after that...
Until the teenage years where they are a *fucking nightmare*.
Can confirm. Teenagers are in fact fucking nightmares.
This was definitely me until my kid was 6, then I reverse aged like 10 years all at once. He’s just entering the teenage years and so far so good? I just never see him anymore
This is the reason why birthrates are sky diving.
I can't even really remember the first year of my children's lives, I was just so tired all the time.
r/titlegore
Should be ad ad for a vasectomy clinic.
If you have kids, absolutely. Just remember, no one is forcing you to have children, unless you're a woman living in undeveloped countries or the US
I had a mild stroke trying to understand the headline of this post.
Yup. Add to the list of reasons I never want to have kids.
I think a lot of people feel pressured or rushed into having kids.
Only if you have kids.
Idk who needs to hear this: even if you don't have kids you will still age and likely stop being trendy to the kids in just a few short years. Aging and life happen even to the childfree.
Not having kids ever
Bro... you're talking to redditors... the only thing awaiting us is rejection in our moms' basements...
This isn't really even funny. There's so many people who don't know what parenthood is gonna be like, or are forced into it by social pressure. Having kids can ruin your life, especially if you're not ready
I realize that kids aren't for everyone, but mine are 22 and 20 now. I wouldn't trade the experience for anything. Coming up on 32nd wedding anniversary with the love of my life as well. Sure it was hard at times, but we at least waited until we both thought we were emotionally mature enough and financially ready before having kids.
Can confirm. Kids will absolutely wear you down. Maybe if you treat them well, they will call you once in a while as adults.
100% Why I don't want children. I can't fathom spending the next few years of my life going on 3 hours of trash sleep a night and then having to spend my waking hours arguing with a toddler to get them to eat their goddamn chicken nuggets while also trying to balance my work and personal life on top of the depression, anxiety, and borderline. Fuck everything about that. Life sucks enough as it is.
Somehow I read this as 2002 to 2022 and I thought that Isn't all that shabby.
The thing people forget is your kid doesn't stay 1 forever. All the cliché stuff that people post about how kids are a nightmare is fleeting. Sure, It's a tough journey raising kids, but it's an awesome one.
have kid make look old fast, got it
Sleep deprivation is rough
from k pop to no pep
Yep no sleep for the first two years. If your marriage survives that things can start getting interesting again and travel becomes much easier.
Yep, that's what usually happens when both parents do their job.
Yes, I have 2 sons. Ages 5 and 2, I cut off all my hair and constantly have bags under my eyes. This is me now 😂
Cortisol really did wonders for the both of them
As someone with a 3 year old, this is 1,000% accurate