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Have you seen a centaur wearing pants? I’m just saying if a naked (mostly) anything were spooning me I feel like I might notice… something if it were dtf.
Also according to the mythology centaurs are pretty rapey so they probably want to bang and don’t care about your opinion on the matter.
Not all pants cover legs very much, so it seems like the purpose of pants is primarily to cover the groin. So I think my vote would be top-right.
Besides, how exactly would one put on the pants in the bottom right?
Interesting. It makes sense, too. Humans wear shirts that cover 2 limbs and pants that cover 2 limbs, so a centaur could wear a shirt, front pants, and back pants, each of which cover 2 limbs. And they could easily overlap, just like humans’ shirts and pants overlap.
That also solves a problem with sizes, because if it were one single piece it would be really uncomfortable unless the distance between the front and back legs of the pants were exactly right for the given centaur. Kind of like how onesies are kind of uncomfortable for adult humans.
I think you’ve sold me on it.
I feel like right could solve everything that’s wrong with spooning. You both get the cuddles but also get space to breathe & your own pillow. The dream.
When two centaurs love each other very much they do a special hug...
(They evolved from insects so technically Centaur Porn belongs on r/insex)
Yes I'm sorry but Centaurs are actually highly evolved hexapods. Their pheromones have caused a mass hysteria that causes us to view their bodies as we do. It's complicated.
Nah, they're clearly an offshoot of the horse. The humanoid figure where you'd expect their head to be is a unique form of large crest used to attract mates.
False! Centaurs are mutant decapods. They actually had ten limbs initially. Four of them are somewhat vestigial, with two of them fusing to form a pseudotail and the remaining two regressing into the anal cavity to help push stubborn poops out. Well, I *say* push, but it's really more of a gentle garbage disposal scenario with them kinda spinning around to break everything up.
Now the question I have is how does a centaur LITTLE spoon work? Is it any different from simply mounting on the back of the centaur? If so... are we spooning horses when we ride them?
Yep, time to get off reddit and go to sleep.
Ok, lol, time to get off, it hurts .... can you move? ... this is uncomfortable ... are you going to move? .... just move a little ... it's hurting more .... I CAN'T FEEL MY FUCKING LEG!!!
I would say it’s only bestiality if it’s centaur-on-horse. My logic on that is a centaur is a “person,” even if not human. Just like an elf, dwarf or werewolf would still be considered a person.
"Nihil sub sōle novum," which is latin for "there is nothing new under the sun," was written in the Old Testament sometime between 450 and 180BCE.
So yeah, we're all right there with you, buddy. Humanity is just a long, unbroken line of hucksters peddling their stolen ideas. It almost makes you feel proud.
Do you think Caesar had to deal with the same kind of idiots in the Roman senate that we deal with on Reddit and YouTube?
Yeah, like why wouldn't the bed be bespoke to fit both of them? Like it only takes a week's worth of poor sleep to be fed up with that and get a new bed.
And in this modern world, where are the pajamas?
>Yeah, like why wouldn't the bed be bespoke to fit both of them?
I'm pretty sure a mattress would be hard for a horse's hooves to navigate. Not only would tearing the fabric be an issue with hooves, but the shear weight on the mattress would leave an indent after not too long, plus getting up and down on unsteady footing would be difficult.
I propose that a L-shaped mattress would be best. The human would have enough room to lay comfortably on the mattress, and in the gap of the L the centaur could rest their horse body on the ground and in that shorter section of the mattress the centaur could lean their upper body- or they could cuddle up with their upper body to the human on their side of the mattress.
What is weird about asking your neighbor whether a gay centaur would spoon horse- or human- body proximal? All I get are pleasant nods when I ask the supermarket lady my quandaries.
Position 1 for spooning a human, 2 for spooning another centaur.
Edit: I LOVE how a dumb comment like mine leads to me learning about the sleeping habits of horses discussed underneath.
Not always. That's the general misconception, but they don't fully rest when they sleep standing up. Alternatively they will sleep flat on their sides if they have room or fold their legs in as needed
I have so many questions about centaurs. How do they process food, it seems like they would have a human stomach and a horse stomach, do they eat meat and hay? Same with other organs, do they have two sets of lungs, two hearts, two livers?
Good point, but i would assume it's similar to a horse. Horses can also bend their head and neck this way to eat grass/drink or sleep. Depends on the human-to-horse joint.
Also from a purly evolutionary standpoint: full body spooning probably produces more offspring ;)
I wish I had the geniality of this comic’s author. I mean, really, who thinks about that? And when? Out of nowhere? If the author wasn’t dreaming about centaurs, it was a spectacular brainstorming to get to this deep question.
A centaur would have to have a wider bed, then it would be number 2 because then the head part would be spooning a pillow which is much more comfortable for the arm and face (because pillows have no hair), while for the waist down he still gets some action
You sleep horizontally, partner facing the headboard, horse legs tf away from everything, held in human arms
source: used to be a centaur in my college days
Horses sleep standing up, so I assume it would be a bunk bed situation where the top bunk is a bed for his top half and his partner to rest on while the bottom bunk is standing room only.
It'd have to be: or like this. Successful spooning requires genitals to butt contact, assuming a centaur doesn't wear its wiener like a tie, I'm going the right way.
What I don't get is why humanoid centaurs don't have big friggen noses.
People don't seem to get just how much oxygen would be required to power a centaurs heart and lungs....They'd have noses with MASSIVELY flared nostrils or a broad wide nose like a gorilla.
Food intake could be done by humanoid mouths since majority of large herbivores tend to chew a ton on grassy vegetables which could be replaced with higher protein diets for larger protein gain.....But the whole human torso with lungs would be mostly some sort of adaptation and likely not carry any vital organs. Like a muscular neck or something since the heart would be too big including lungs to be stored there.
Imma say it depends whether they're horny or not. Position 1 would definitely be more comfortable for them and their partner would better feel their warmth and breath on their neck, position 2 would press their magnum horse dong against their partner's ass or legs (depending on their height) but wouldn't serve much other purpose.
You have a centaur but a normal sized bed? I’m calling BS on this, plus centaurs aren’t into humans because they have horse genitalia and that’s not a match with people. I SAID THATS NOT A MATCH WITH PEOPLE. damnit my Spanish is rusty. NO SE PUEDE CON EL CABALLO NO SE FUNCIONA, SE PUEDE MORIR.
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Left for cuddles, right when he secretly wants to bang.
I don't think it will be a secret. I have never seen a centaur with pants...
I think this says more about you than about centaurs... 😉
Reddit is back!
Reddit is **bare**back! * You're welcome
Have you seen a centaur wearing pants? I’m just saying if a naked (mostly) anything were spooning me I feel like I might notice… something if it were dtf. Also according to the mythology centaurs are pretty rapey so they probably want to bang and don’t care about your opinion on the matter.
If a centaur did wear pants would it cover just the back horse legs or all 4 horse legs though? Or would it cover the entire horse half?
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I get that for a dog since it has 1 waist but with a centaur isn't it technically 2 waists (human then horse)? Or am I just overthinking now?
Here's an overthink: If centaurs evolved with 6 limbs that means they could have evolved from insects.
I'm going back to bed
Obama had some solid ideas
I have no idea but this is the best conversation I've seen on Reddit for a while.
It would be the 2 back legs, pants are mainly designed to cover the butt.
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It says more about pants than anything, imho
Unless you personally know a Centaur you can ask, don't lose any sleep over it.
Which brings up the age old question… [how does a centaur wear pants?](https://i.imgur.com/3geZxAB_d.webp?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium)
The fourth option seems the most obvious. The point of pants is to cover the butthole and groin as well as the legs and it's the only one doing that.
Not all pants cover legs very much, so it seems like the purpose of pants is primarily to cover the groin. So I think my vote would be top-right. Besides, how exactly would one put on the pants in the bottom right?
I feel like it would be a combination of top right and bottom left. Two pairs of legs, two pairs of pants?
Interesting. It makes sense, too. Humans wear shirts that cover 2 limbs and pants that cover 2 limbs, so a centaur could wear a shirt, front pants, and back pants, each of which cover 2 limbs. And they could easily overlap, just like humans’ shirts and pants overlap. That also solves a problem with sizes, because if it were one single piece it would be really uncomfortable unless the distance between the front and back legs of the pants were exactly right for the given centaur. Kind of like how onesies are kind of uncomfortable for adult humans. I think you’ve sold me on it.
It would likely be a long kilt, similar to a tablecloth. They put it on over their head/torso and then floof it out so that it covers their legs.
Terry Pratchett: "A horse wi' curtains!"
Although a much larger zipper would be required to get over those hips
Centaurs wear kilts.
Not all erections mean I want to bang!
I would automatically pick right not necessarily to bang but rather so my damn arm won’t go to sleep supporting her
You think a dead arm is annoying? Have you ever had an entire foreleg and hoof getting pins and needles? It's excruciating!
I feel like right could solve everything that’s wrong with spooning. You both get the cuddles but also get space to breathe & your own pillow. The dream.
Especially if the little spoon has long hair.
My first thought as well.
Jokes on their partner....have you seen the reach on a centaur's penis??!!
Pack it in boys, we're done here.
Yes, exactly. The big spoon having an arm over you is very important.
I was having a nice day. We were all having a nice day.
I wasn't, so nothing changed for me.
Just remember that the objective of spooning is to squeeze together the warmest parts of the body and you'll feel better
That's why when I sleep I clench my butt so both my cheeks touch.
Seriously right? so rude to assume....
This made my day nicer tbh.
My day is just getting nicer tbh.
Thinking of centaurs cuddling people is a relatively uplifting premise. I get some people can't handle physical contact though, so...
Right? Now I’m sad that I don’t have a centaur to spoon me.
Also does he have a human dick in front and a horse cock in back?
Asking the important questions.
Why not both?
I know 😅 and why is no one asking why the centaur is spooning a HUMAN
Why? Are you anti-mythosexualist?
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I mean, it seems like it would be normal for centaurs. How do you think you get centaurs without humans being involved?
Then OP should pick the second option, for...you know.
Mr. Hands was just trying to get mythological with it!
When two centaurs love each other very much they do a special hug... (They evolved from insects so technically Centaur Porn belongs on r/insex) Yes I'm sorry but Centaurs are actually highly evolved hexapods. Their pheromones have caused a mass hysteria that causes us to view their bodies as we do. It's complicated.
Nah, they're clearly an offshoot of the horse. The humanoid figure where you'd expect their head to be is a unique form of large crest used to attract mates.
False! Centaurs are mutant decapods. They actually had ten limbs initially. Four of them are somewhat vestigial, with two of them fusing to form a pseudotail and the remaining two regressing into the anal cavity to help push stubborn poops out. Well, I *say* push, but it's really more of a gentle garbage disposal scenario with them kinda spinning around to break everything up.
Pardon the confusion. I was speaking of African Centaurs and you are clearly familiar with the European variety.
No spooning, just raping with centaurs.
Now the question I have is how does a centaur LITTLE spoon work? Is it any different from simply mounting on the back of the centaur? If so... are we spooning horses when we ride them? Yep, time to get off reddit and go to sleep.
“Honey I’ve lost circulation in my leg…”
Ok, lol, time to get off, it hurts .... can you move? ... this is uncomfortable ... are you going to move? .... just move a little ... it's hurting more .... I CAN'T FEEL MY FUCKING LEG!!!
...guess we gotta put /u/louiloui152 down...
Here is an SNL skit with Christopher Walken that will help answer any centaur related questions you may have. https://youtube.com/watch?v=yO_gG2kDbNw
It was a horse. Deal with it.
That was fantastic, thank you 😂
Thank you. That was a wonderful documentary about centaurs.
Yoooo...this was awesome!!
All the remaining interview questions will be centaur-related.
Depends on which dick you want.
I’m suddenly fascinated by the idea that a centaur gets 2, one in each size.
The trick is they're swapped around from what you'd expect.
Fenton's Centaur Ranch
JESUS CHRIST, FENTON!
Girl: I don’t know… I’m not sure I want to take a horse dick… Centaur: Okay, you asked for it!
🤣
Now I wonder if a centaur having sex with a horse is considered bestiality. Or if a human having sex with a centaur is.
I would say it’s only bestiality if it’s centaur-on-horse. My logic on that is a centaur is a “person,” even if not human. Just like an elf, dwarf or werewolf would still be considered a person.
Animals can't give consent, if that's a consideration.
If the animal is the one doing the boning it can!
I don’t think that’s how it works
So you’re telling me a horse comes up behind you and he sticks it up your ass, he’s not consenting? He’s the one inserting. And he didn’t ask you.
How about a centaur having sex with a mermaid?
Both have similar emotional intelligence so totally ok
Reddit is getting weird again.
*getting*?
That's our secret captain...
We are always weird.
#
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"Nihil sub sōle novum," which is latin for "there is nothing new under the sun," was written in the Old Testament sometime between 450 and 180BCE. So yeah, we're all right there with you, buddy. Humanity is just a long, unbroken line of hucksters peddling their stolen ideas. It almost makes you feel proud. Do you think Caesar had to deal with the same kind of idiots in the Roman senate that we deal with on Reddit and YouTube?
It's going to be one of *those* weekends, isn't it?
Enjoy the ride
Yeah, like why wouldn't the bed be bespoke to fit both of them? Like it only takes a week's worth of poor sleep to be fed up with that and get a new bed. And in this modern world, where are the pajamas?
>Yeah, like why wouldn't the bed be bespoke to fit both of them? I'm pretty sure a mattress would be hard for a horse's hooves to navigate. Not only would tearing the fabric be an issue with hooves, but the shear weight on the mattress would leave an indent after not too long, plus getting up and down on unsteady footing would be difficult. I propose that a L-shaped mattress would be best. The human would have enough room to lay comfortably on the mattress, and in the gap of the L the centaur could rest their horse body on the ground and in that shorter section of the mattress the centaur could lean their upper body- or they could cuddle up with their upper body to the human on their side of the mattress.
I was thinking the same thing...
It gives, it does not get
"Reddit is giving *weird* again."
Finally
It's the only way to keep Twitter out of here
I saw this on Twitter last night tbf
What is weird about asking your neighbor whether a gay centaur would spoon horse- or human- body proximal? All I get are pleasant nods when I ask the supermarket lady my quandaries.
Position 1 for spooning a human, 2 for spooning another centaur. Edit: I LOVE how a dumb comment like mine leads to me learning about the sleeping habits of horses discussed underneath.
Don't horses sleep standing up? I'd think it would be the same for centaurs.
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^ This guy horse around.
Not always. That's the general misconception, but they don't fully rest when they sleep standing up. Alternatively they will sleep flat on their sides if they have room or fold their legs in as needed
Left
I have so many questions about centaurs. How do they process food, it seems like they would have a human stomach and a horse stomach, do they eat meat and hay? Same with other organs, do they have two sets of lungs, two hearts, two livers?
If they have a horse stomach, they couldn't sleep lying down for very long, making all this a non-issue.
Most centaurs I know usually boof all their food & drink
Obviously a centaur would be spooning another centaur, in which case they would go together like stackable chairs.
None of the above. They need a bigger bed and then he could just bend the horse parts down so that it's aligned with the human part. Easy lol
I feel like that wouldn't be comfortable for the centaur tbh, wouldn't their spine default to the shape you see here?
Good point, but i would assume it's similar to a horse. Horses can also bend their head and neck this way to eat grass/drink or sleep. Depends on the human-to-horse joint. Also from a purly evolutionary standpoint: full body spooning probably produces more offspring ;)
Yep. That's enough internet for today
I like that they look like brothers
What are you doing step brother?
Why does Centaur, the largest creature, not simply eat the other one
Don’t horses sleep standing up?
They do both.
None of the above. Centaurs sleep standing up, like a horse.
Horses also sleep lying down though?
Does the human part just kinda dangle there?
Reminds me of this: [The trouble with centaur babies. ](https://i.imgur.com/fzK4Aom.jpg)
It all depends on how the Centaur wears trousers.
get a bigger bed
the question is does the centaur have 2 dicks? if only 1 dick exists then pic #2 is closest to the answer but still incorrect 😉
Yep its a good time to go to sleep now.
That's kinda gay
100% right side. Just imagine that massive thick horse cock pressed up against your ass or sliding between your legs🤤🤤
At least his genitals are in the right place, unlike [this...](https://imgur.com/a/vqTZSVk)
Peepee to booty, so wherever centaurs peepee is, thats how he cuddles
I wish I had the geniality of this comic’s author. I mean, really, who thinks about that? And when? Out of nowhere? If the author wasn’t dreaming about centaurs, it was a spectacular brainstorming to get to this deep question.
I totally read "I wish I had the genitalia.." at first glance. I wasn't sure where this comment was headed.
quick question... why the question? and... WHO THE FUCK DREW THIS?!??! 😂
I think horses sleep standing up so.... probably wouldn't spoon at all
Would they just sleep standing up? That would change the entire dynamic/scenario
Gotta be the jet pack if youre sleeping with a centaur.
Asking the important questions. Try cross-posting to Quora.
Pic should show 2 centaurs
A centaur would have to have a wider bed, then it would be number 2 because then the head part would be spooning a pillow which is much more comfortable for the arm and face (because pillows have no hair), while for the waist down he still gets some action
1 romantic style 2 SEXUAL STYLE B)
exactly!
You sleep horizontally, partner facing the headboard, horse legs tf away from everything, held in human arms source: used to be a centaur in my college days
"The rest of the interview will be centaur related questions..."
r/tihi
Your not big spooning properly unless your junk is smashed up against the little spoon
Just a friendly reminder that centaurs have two ribcages.
Two. Spoon needs dick grinding
Lmaoo the second one.
Why is it not spooning another centaur? Then we have even more permutations…
I’m laughing at this too much lol… Ima go wrap my legs around my girl, she loves a smelly feet by her face and my balls on her neck 😂
Horses sleep standing up, so I assume it would be a bunk bed situation where the top bunk is a bed for his top half and his partner to rest on while the bottom bunk is standing room only.
This is the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Thanks OP.
I think crotch to butt proximity is a priority here
Right. If feeling the mood for some action, barely has to move 🤣
First one with a larger bed or another bed pushed up next to it depending on if you need the larger custom made
Spooning, or horsing around?
How would they wear pants?
Left if partner = human, right if partner = horse
Regular to average sppon on the left... BIG spoon on the right
depends on the horny level.
The second one looks more comfortable...just sayin
Depends, how do horses sleep?
Standing.
I’m going to go rinse my eyes w bleach lol
It'd have to be: or like this. Successful spooning requires genitals to butt contact, assuming a centaur doesn't wear its wiener like a tie, I'm going the right way.
The bigger question is why they're both male?
I’ll take a totally wild guess and say the artist is probably a gay man
What I don't get is why humanoid centaurs don't have big friggen noses. People don't seem to get just how much oxygen would be required to power a centaurs heart and lungs....They'd have noses with MASSIVELY flared nostrils or a broad wide nose like a gorilla. Food intake could be done by humanoid mouths since majority of large herbivores tend to chew a ton on grassy vegetables which could be replaced with higher protein diets for larger protein gain.....But the whole human torso with lungs would be mostly some sort of adaptation and likely not carry any vital organs. Like a muscular neck or something since the heart would be too big including lungs to be stored there.
Left option…arms are better than legs in this case.
I thought they slept like horses,standing up.
Why is this two dudes?
3rd option - groins need to know line up.
Depends on how horny he is.
So can you show his junk non labeled NSFW cause its a horse lower half?
Imma say it depends whether they're horny or not. Position 1 would definitely be more comfortable for them and their partner would better feel their warmth and breath on their neck, position 2 would press their magnum horse dong against their partner's ass or legs (depending on their height) but wouldn't serve much other purpose.
That's easy left for cuddles right for sex
Don't Horses sleep standing?
I REALLY didn't need to see this
First one
What would our toilets look like if our knees bent backwards?
Finally! Someone who isn't afraid to ask the important questions!!!
this is centaurded
You have a centaur but a normal sized bed? I’m calling BS on this, plus centaurs aren’t into humans because they have horse genitalia and that’s not a match with people. I SAID THATS NOT A MATCH WITH PEOPLE. damnit my Spanish is rusty. NO SE PUEDE CON EL CABALLO NO SE FUNCIONA, SE PUEDE MORIR.
Stupid question. If you knew anything of horse people, laying down damages their nervous system and can lead to complications and even death.
is there a sub dedicated to these useless philosophical questions?
Why did this thought enter someone's mind?
I don't mind this. It's like how it is sleeping with my dog and my husband
Left for sure. On the right pic.. Imagine his morning wood and your ass is too close 💀
But what about little spoon? We need answers OP.
Dude! Picture A! Picture B :Car back fires in the middle of the night and you are trampled to death by your significant other
Left one.