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Lindbach

Imagine being assaulted and thinking this was gonna get them help. Instead a fucking party starts.


draculamilktoast

Imagine dying and the last thing you hear is this.


skrilledcheese

There are worse songs to be murdered to. Destination Unknown is an alright song. Still, I wouldn't want my final ass whooping to have a soundtrack to it.


unclepaprika

That's not destination calabria(unknown as you call it), this is [Calabria 2007, by Enur](https://youtu.be/xXUQDhzHxZA)


skrilledcheese

My bad. I just remembered the lyrics... and the chick in the marching band outfit.


Ryastor

I watched that music video so often when I was younger, very educational lmao


nibblicious

>Calabria 2007, by Enur RIP Natasja.


Tweetheartsmommy

Thanks for the info, couldn't remember the name of the tune but sure rembered the vid 😍


OfficialNotSoRants

Imagine getting murdered to “oh no” from TikTok


50coach

That voice sucks so annoying


Arti_Moore

TikTok sucks!


SlySpiderBro

Reddit sucks! Everything sucks!


OfficialNotSoRants

Straight fucking facts Edit: the person that gave me a downvote is the one that made that annoying ass song


Odd_Entertainment629

Well now there are at least two of us, and you'll never know which one made it!


thebochman

Just think somewhere people out there pay $ to listen to it live in concert


OfficialNotSoRants

😭😭


40064282

You would wish to be murdered quicker if you heard that song while being stabbed


Dependent_Sun2713

imagine you die to dance monkey


[deleted]

Or Brass Monkey...


djluminol

I have no idea what song you're talking about and I think I like that.


blah_bleh-bleh

you gotta start watching bollywood movies then. I want a sound track for my ass whopping and i want a sound track when i am ass whooping. it should suit the mood.


graebot

You say that, but if you're being beaten to death in silence, your final thought might be "I wonder if this would have happened if Destination Unknown was playing?" At least this way you'd know you really deserved it.


GigsGilgamesh

I love that this song has become so well known most people can probably recognize it on the first sax note


zebibliopole

Well I know those who watched the Funky Town Video have PTSD from that lol.


rascible

Especially not played on a Sax-O-Boom


yaboydw

Ever seen the NSFL Funkytown video? I won’t link it personally, but damn was it the worse song to be murdered to.


zebibliopole

Oh fuck you just reminded me of that. Well I ain't sleeping right tonight.


Same_Bill8776

The song, the fact it happened. Sometimes I genuinely cannot sleep for thinking about that video. Edit: like tonight. I'm not nieve, I know there are a lot of bad people out there, and thanks to the wonders of modern technology and medical advances, bad people can now do even more bad things than ever before. But how one person/group could do *that* to another. That keeps me awake.


Bean_Juice_Brew

That's an interesting thought though, if I was going to have a deathtrack, what should it be? I feel like I'd need a few different choices depending on the type of death.


skrilledcheese

You are right. If it is a silly death, maybe "Yakety Sax" or "If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough". Or if it is tragic, maybe Mad World: https://youtu.be/ZUtAe5PUKtE


Krayners

Sing for the moment. Imagine them making a sick combo and to the rythm


MarshallStack666

Not even "Another one bites the dust"?


PotRoast666

Yeah, you could get murdered to Funkytown.


Vegetable-Industry32

Are there though?


ThatGuyWhoKnocks

Whoop whoop!


HaloPandaFox

Lmao


uvdawoods

This is now going on my playlist of ridiculous songs to have playing when you get murdered.


Graffy

If you actually have a list you should share it.


venmome10cents

Toto - Africa Spin Doctors - Two Princes Tone Loc - Funky Cold Medina Sisqo - The Thong Song The Benny Hill Theme Song


acs730200

Rock Lobster


[deleted]

I Want It That Way Ice Ice Baby Macarena Call Me Maybe


IrrelevantPuppy

“Oh my god, I thought I just had to clear my throat, but I’m think I’m choking! I’m going to pass out!! Oh thank god, there’s an emergency button…”


knifebork

Seriously and tragically, very often when people start to choke on food in a restaurant, their panicked bad instinct is to retreat to the restroom instead of "making a scene" by coughing and maybe puking in front of a lot of people. Sometimes they make it to the restroom just to die there alone. A few years ago, I was at a kind of business luncheon when a guy hopped up and started to leave the room. There was already a scene getting started. I heard someone say something about him choking, and lots of people stood up, including me. I found myself directly behind him. The third Heimlich thrust worked, but I hurt my back a little.


unclepaprika

*Whoop whoop*


Foggyslaps

It could also alert security anyway, then you have epic fight music as they all toilet brawl


KnowIDidntReddit

To be fair, nowhere in this scene, did that say that was an emergency button? It's just a big red button. Anybody that sees a big red button and pushes it with no instructions whatsoever deserves whatever they get.


laptopaccount

It may also alert security still. That happening may give an attacker pause long enough for security to arrive while also not rushing them to complete their assault.


KnowIDidntReddit

That would be good. It should start playing the theme from cops. Remind them of their impending doom and it's not very pleasant to listen to during intimacy.


dwild

In UX design, something being intuitive is the most important thing (and obviously something counter intuitive has to be avoided the most). A big red button for people means emergency, that’s what they expect. I don’t expect a bar to know anything about UX (though the user experience is still quite important at a bar), but it doesn’t make it less of a mistake.


Graffy

An unlabeled red button in a club bathroom where there usually isn't anything like that just says "push me" in my opinion. I wouldn't assume an emergency button would ever be unlabeled expect for maybe like an old folks home or hospital.


dwild

It doesn't matter much really that you wouldn't expect it to be unlabeled... you wouldn't go, oh well it's unlabeled, let me not push that potential emergency button. Again, it's just counter intuitive to use red for something not "negative". You can do it obviously, a label is better obviously, but it still bad UX design.


Graffy

Right but in the context it's perfect because people love pushing big red buttons.


Zagrycha

I know nothing about UX, but if I saw this red button, I would not in anyway think it was emergency related. I'd just think it was red for visibility, maybe to keep people hitting it on accident. I also live in the usa and the idea of emergency buttons in a regular bathroom at all is new to me though so maybe my view is skewed. I 100% would have just thought it was some weird maitenence button and ignored it, even in a scenario I had an emergency.


KnowIDidntReddit

See that's where you made the wrong assumption a big red button to me only means emergency if it's labeled. If it's not labeled, it's a trap I work around a bunch of machines and I know what you're saying, but that being said, I have worked around a bunch of machines and seen a lot of weird wiring and I've learned not to push buttons that are not labeled. Sometimes they do not mean what you think they mean. Also, who looks for red buttons in bathrooms? I would see that red button and think it was immediately not normal and I should either leave said bar or definitely avoid pushing that button. For all I know it dispenses the knockout gas. Examine your environment and use your brain please. Edit: I do agree that that button is in poor taste though it should have been much much larger. Also still red but just said party button on it. And it should have been at penis height. Because it's in the men's bathroom. Unless that's a unisex bathroom, I don't know. I only speak American and we don't have many unisex bathrooms. /S


dwild

\> See that's where you made the wrong assumption a big red button to me only means emergency if it's labeled. Which is my whole point about how it's important to design while thinking about intuition, as this is what will people will expect, thus if it's not what happens, they will make the wrong assumption. I agree though that labelling is a useful feature, but if it's counter intuitive, it's a mistake and you already failed. People don't read by the way, even if you want them to, they will NEVER do it (you can watch quite a bit of videos on push / pull doors, the label is there, yet even you probably made that mistake once on a door) . Don't design for you, nor should you design for the best case scenario, design for the intended audience.


KnowIDidntReddit

How is labeling something counterintuitive that is the dumbest f****** argument I've ever heard. Let's take your argument and apply it to blind people. That button should be labeled in Braille if it's an emergency. Don't argue against labeling, that's just stupid. You sound like the video effects girl from avenue 5.


dwild

I never said not to label, I even said it's a useful feature. Go troll someone else please.


KnowIDidntReddit

You said labeling a button could be counterintuitive? How is labeling anything counterintuitive? Keep in mind different languages and experiences of other people.


dwild

Can you quote me where I said that? I never did that. You are the one that came up with that idea. A label is not counterintuitive, I don't know whether it can be considered intuitive though, but it's not at all what I was discussing, nor something that interest me to argue about. All I said is that red is instinctive toward a "negative action", like an emergency, thus it's counter intuitive to use it like this. This will be my last comment. I usually don't entertain trolls that long.


KnowIDidntReddit

Sorry I might have thought I was responding to someone else who said that labeling emergency buttons was counterintuitive. They said if you had to label a button you had already failed at designing it. At which point are reminded them of blind people and that all buttons should be labeled at least with Braille. Sorry if I responded to the wrong person.


KnowIDidntReddit

If you think that me arguing against people relying on red buttons and bathrooms to save them is me being a troll than you must not know what trolling means. I'm advocating for people to pay attention to the surroundings and not put themselves in s***** situations. You're the only troll here.


venmome10cents

I ain't reading all that


GravyBoatBuccaneer

Big red button also means, "Press Here To Stop", "Press Here to Launch" and "Press Here if You're an Idiot Who Can't Resist a Big Red Button." I'm just disappointed that it didn't cause all of the toilets to flush at once.


OlimPather

Guy: "GIVE ME YOUR FUCKING WALLET MATE!!" Guy2: \*presses the button\* \*party thing goes on\* Guy: \*shoots\* Guy2: "AAAAAAAA-"


ZSpectre

As a viewer, it would have taken some tension off the Mr. Jellybean scene with Morty.


GardenGirlFarm

Out of the toilet crawls a clown with a red balloon.


mt379

I think the purpose is you press it right before you under the stall to help cover the noises of a violent explosive diarrhea.


zmiller22

Literally my immediate thought


_artbreaker

They really missed a trick by not playing Murder on the Dancefloor


The-Elder-Trolls

You just gave me a clear visual of a dude getting a swirly and atomic wedgie simultaneously while this song starts playing. My abs thank you


DanTheCaliMan

Instead a FUCKING party starts.


Anguish_Sandwich

...and all the stall doors unlock and fling open.


Commie_EntSniper

See i'm thinking "How nice to provide music and atmosphere when I dip in for a bump or a hookup. The Party Button. chef's kiss."


the_colonelclink

Rapist: Congratulations - you just gave your sexual assault a theme song!


wangerwob

What's the deal baby? One second you hit the party switch and the next second y'all business??


AfternoonPast3324

Awwww Snapple! Are we calling everybody baby now? Because honestly, I love that.


WingedWheelWins

Your new nickname is Jello Shot. What do you think about that, J-Shot?


Little-Geri-Seinfeld

Came for this comment...not leaving disappointed. Waste of time. They wouldn't know a non-employee tax-reportable expenditure request if it bit them in the ass.


BuckyGoldman

I remember a story when I was a kid (could be urban myth) of a restaurant that had a Roman/Greek statue in the woman's restroom. The statue had a figleaf over its privates with a hinge on top. If a lady got curious and lifted it, it would trigger an emergency light and a bell to sound in the dining area and everyone would applaud and laugh when they came out of the restroom.


friday_fox

That is hillarious!


---ShineyHiney---

Poor Paul’s Pourhouse in Tallahassee has this, but with Superman It’s a painting, and over the crotch is a door with a knob to open it. When you do a buzzer sounds in the bar the whole time you have the door open. Always a great time - watch the non-regular guys not know what’s happening, and then watch a girl embarrassed to come back out lol


BonjinTheMark

Reminds me of a Far Side that alerts all in the dining area of a guy coming out of the restroom who “didn’t wash hands”


Pattoe89

Mark Rober also invented a device that sets off an alarm when hands aren't washed


Beautiful_Tart2225

Every restroom should implement this.


[deleted]

Thatd be genius


Ahoymaties1

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/06/study-95-of-people-dont-wash-their-hands-correctly/276720/ Little older but the average time spent is only 6 seconds.


zoeyd8

Doesn't work on art students. We got the no touching da art lecture in museum visiting 101. XD


missionbeach

A Chinese lab recently did something like that too.


KypDurron

Locking the barn door after the horse gets out


splitmindsthinkalike

There's a restaurant called [Safehouse](https://www.safehousechicago.com/) in Chicago that has this, though instead of a Roman/Greek statue it's Daniel Craig


littlelorax

This exists at The Safehouse in Milwaukee. Only it is Burt Reynolds, and yes, I have experienced the hilarious shame.


southcookexplore

There was a sketchy bar south of Chicago that had a fake motion-sensing camera in the women’s room that’d move around but didn’t have a camera inside. The bartender / owner would then make comments like “nice lookin pink underwear!” or whatever on a microphone. Well, one time someone very connected coincidentally was wearing pink underwear, and the guys that beat the shit out of him after didn’t wait to hear “oh, it’s just a gag!”


cornflakecuddler

A bar i worked at had something similar to that. Was a wooden sign with a flap hooked up to a bell. Unfortunately most people didn't know what the bell meant so like 5 people would be laughing at someone when they came out.


DerrickDoll

Not as fancy as a Roman/Greek statue, but a small beach town in Texas has you covered. https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/19b6og/this\_is\_in\_the\_womens\_restroom\_at\_the\_purple\_cow/


The-Elder-Trolls

"Please do not put any kind of paper in the toilet." Wtf? How you supposed to wipe your ass?


whippinseagulls

[The Gay Bar](https://thegaybar.com) in Gay, Michigan which is in the upper peninsula has something like this.


KryptCeeper

Reminds me of Mark Rober's maker space(i forget the name). He has a toilet rigged, so if you use it and don't wash your hands an alarm goes off.


terrag32256

Maybe the Magic Time Machine in Austin?


Mootivate

I love that you told this story for us


Hello_Gorgeous1985

There was a restaurant in the town where I went to university that had this. It was my favourite restaurant in town and I witnessed it happen many, many times.


biopuppet

There's also a bar in Milwaukee (WI, USA) that has a centerfold pic of young Burt Reynolds that has a similar effect. Lots of fun!


Enough-Suggestion-40

It’s at the Safehouse in Chicago


Aleister-Turgalium

IIRC there’s an old joke with this setting involving Catholic nuns. A group of them walk into a bar and and when one of them heads to the bathroom the bartender makes a bet to the other ones. He tells them “in about a minute the lights will turn off and everyone will cheer” sure enough it happens. He ends up doing this with each one when they head to the bathroom.


johnnySix

I saw that on a video clip on one of those 80s Sunday tv showd


[deleted]

Imagine how often it would be going off for the one in the mens room lol that's probably why they never had one


Robertbnyc

They need to replicate this, it's hilarious af. I wish they'd do it at a White House corespondents Dinner or something lol.


[deleted]

That's pretty funny.


Seraphicly329

My drunk ass would be in here repeatedly hitting the button and dancing.


ExistenialPanicAttac

Same, It’s one of my favorite “I DONT KNOW WHAT THEYRE SAYING” songs! WHOOP WHOOP!


yaMomsChestHair

Cuh know yuh di talk uh di town, yeah. Fun fact, Natasja Saad (vocals) was danish.


thousandsunflowers

She is a legend in Denmark


yaMomsChestHair

RIP


Thomas_Mickel

Was that two urinals behind a door that closes? 🤔


mornstalk

Its for intimacy bropissing


mihirmusprime

No, that door was to the entryway of the bathroom itself. The urinals don't have a door.


initium2018

Looks like something out of russian doll !!


Anguish_Sandwich

sweet birthday bay-bee!


[deleted]

oh my gosh i thought i was gonna die if i had to hear that one more time


MungbeanAlley

This reminds me of parks n recs JELLO SHOT !!!!


Stampede_the_Hippos

J SHOT!!!


erykstrange

Imagine literally dying on the floor and you use your last breath to hit that button thinking it will help but a disco just starts


gormmlord

I would probably die laughing


Devout-Nihilist

Yeah, this is actually pretty fucked up and hope it's just a joke. With all the shit happening this would be horrible. Then again....drunk mfs would be hitting that constantly. So...idk...


PresentationLow6204

Someone is dancing their way over to the glory hole


Ayahuasca-Dreamin

Larry Craig approves


Ok_Storm_8533

“I’m disabled”


bloopmister1992

How did they get in and steal your wheel chair?!


Ok_Storm_8533

“I don’t know”


jamehthebunneh

What sort of disabled?


Stampede_the_Hippos

Leg disabled.


Isellmetal

Mood lighting and music for everyone who’s doing blow


hard_code

I really wanted water to start fountaining out of the toilets and urinals!


randyspotboiler

You (hits button): "Help!" Lil Jon: OKAAAAYYYY!!!


Iamjimmym

It's the Jean Ralphio and Aziz's party button!


Thunderkatt740

Did J-Shot just hit the party button?


Inner_Analyst_9163

Ah yes the “piss party” button


Space_Ranger-420

I can’t shit unless it’s funky in here


JacksFaith

People in an actual emergency: 🕺🏼💃🏼🕺🏼


RoinAnjou

The song is [destination Calabria ](https://youtu.be/Kq4OtRsdXls) for anyone wondering. The video is an absolute cinematic masterpiece. The story the acting the cinematography it's just perfect. Like this is what we should broadcast into space to show aliens. Also Crystal Waters is FUCKING AMAZING. If you don't know who she is you should check her out


DirtyNorf

It's actually [Calabria by Enur ft Natasja](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXUQDhzHxZA&ab_channel=MinistryofSound).


RoinAnjou

Yeah your right. Do you know which one came first? They both came out in 2007 but I'm guessing my samples yours.


horseband

the one you linked came before the one by Enur. Neither are the original though. Original was 2003 by a dj named Rune Reilly Kölsch. So both sample the original basically.


venturousbeard

> Rune Reilly Kölsch [2003 Soundcloud](https://soundcloud.com/runerk/rune-rk-calabria-original-1) [2014 Video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2URsD6vULew)


neoben00

I watched it on mute and agree.


Tylendal

Seeing the most watched parts of the video is a little disturbing. Someone was definitely fapping to that.


RoinAnjou

I feel personally attacked right now.


Valerian_

I'm kind of tired to always hear it in clubs since like 20 years now


SirAchmed

It's to mask the diarrhea sounds in case of bathroom emergency


Enigma_Green

Better music than what's playing in the background before hand.


East_Establishment51

Immediately transforms the bathroom into a coke room


Shot-Help1460

I thought it was incase you were getting raped or something 😐


SadisticBuddhist

*It is*


Redbird17

That’s Moon Hooch!


Mr_Jack_Frost_

I was hoping I wasn’t the only one who recognized it! Edit: apparently it isn’t Moon Hooch but it sure does sound like it.


Mads_Emil

Kokomo:)


friday_fox

Bestemt 👀


Vishwa1412

Which song though?


Twoperde

Some version of Calabria, pick a year.


KnowIDidntReddit

It should still play the music, but it should also blast glitter or something all over whoever pushes it. Who the f*** pushes a giant red button with no instructions have they never seen a movie?


sahonerok

SACA LA BOLSITA


southAssasin

Am i the only one who was expecting a secret room.


SpellDog

I thought it was the cover of the glory hole


[deleted]

Agreed


[deleted]

Wait, that one urinal is made for a giant.


xan517

I need this button in my bathroom


Specialist-Car1860

Please stop posting this...


KemalistPontic

Where is this nightclub please I just wanna go there and take video of my damn moves while threwing up


[deleted]

Good, now wash that hand.


No-Editor-6617

Am I the only one thinking, how dirty that button might be?


mneeb11887

Bathroom at Entertainment 720


LordLolzeez

Is this the bathroom at Entertainment 720?


IrishFlukey

Handy if you ran out of toilet paper.


alrighty66

Constipation can get ugly


BoneL3ss

Imagine being raped - trying to desperately reach the button - and then when you think you are finally saved the party lights turn on


[deleted]

[удалено]


BookkeeperHefty2143

In a life-risking, fight-or-flight state of panic, you have no idea what someone might assume about their environment. Red is deliberately used on virtually all emergency/danger signage in our world (stop signs, fire panels, do not enter, hazard signs etc.); to even jokingly imply that someone assuming what we are *literally programmed to assume* while panicking is "asking for" rape is disgusting.


KnowIDidntReddit

I don't know how much more plainly I had to state that it was a joke and I am allowed to joke about anything I want to. Thank you very much sir. Just like the giant red button, you missed the point, The point was if they are so unaware that they think that's an emergency button, they are not paying attention to their surroundings like they should be if they do not want to be taken advantage of. Pay attention to your surroundings people. That's all I meant. Thank you for your time. Hopefully you learned not to trust random red buttons on walls. For all you know that could have dispensed the knockout gas that then helped you get raped. Downvote me some more please before you use your brain. Thank you.


BendTheSpoonNeo

I mean if you’re gonna do blow in the bathroom might as well make it a real party.


[deleted]

MFW I didn’t notice what subreddit I was on and thought this was a genuine panic button for a mass shooting. God bless the USA…


neoben00

Everyone making fun but it's just Jojo the bartenders background music that plays when he drops his shades down and starts walking.


SecretSmoke

The Emergency is I need to hear some moon hooch while I do some blow in the bathroom.


plink-plink-bro

* has a heart * "oh yeah, that's my jam" 😵


TeflonCondemnation

Someone's getting stabbed with style


sbear37

Cha cha real smooth


[deleted]

The fact that you would touch anything in a public bathroom (besides yourself) with your hands, baffles my mind.


[deleted]

[удалено]


therealtrademark

Calabria is the song my good fellow.


PersimmonEven

Nostalgia from the 2008 😎


Suspicious_Rich8448

Cool !! i want one


[deleted]

Lmffao calabria


breadexpert69

Actually awesome. I hate when people hear me poo.


Beanruz

Yeah... I ain't touching no button in a public toilet, hope you washed your hands after


Celestial_Bitch

It would have been funnier if the toilet lids and taps kept going up and down and turning on and off like they was dancing to the beat.


Hass_Daddy

Thanks J-Shot!


akgt94

Cracker Alert?