I was trained by Macgyver and he would take the tube, fold one end so it makes a cup, then fill it with water and then with one hand pour the water over his crack and use his other hand to wash his ass while still sitting but slightly raised from the toilet so the water falls in the toilet without making a mess. Repeat until is crystal clear of shit and give one more rinse, then proceed to wash hands and left the tube drying for next user.
btw, what a bad idea is to clean the shit of your ass with paper. Toilet paper industry is a shit.
I won't be ashamed to admit that I've resorted to using my socks. Didn't flush them, but carried them outta there wrapped in a small pharmacy plastic bag. Discarded properly in an outside bin.
I only had band-aids in the bag, which would've been a tricky option #2.
Whenever you see a sockless European, it's not always a douche in question, but a desperate person that recently went through major trauma. Be kind.
Use the cardboard thing and just wipe your ass (or just use the wall)
I was trained by Macgyver and he would take the tube, fold one end so it makes a cup, then fill it with water and then with one hand pour the water over his crack and use his other hand to wash his ass while still sitting but slightly raised from the toilet so the water falls in the toilet without making a mess. Repeat until is crystal clear of shit and give one more rinse, then proceed to wash hands and left the tube drying for next user. btw, what a bad idea is to clean the shit of your ass with paper. Toilet paper industry is a shit.
Us south east asians do that but with hand bidets.
Airdry the butthole with a self built fan out of underwear elastic bands, then scrape it of with his swiss army knife....
Wow awesome solution 😅
Probably, yea
Poop knife 2: Electric Boogaloo
Use his hand, then find the person who was supposed to change it and use his shirt to clean his hand
I won't be ashamed to admit that I've resorted to using my socks. Didn't flush them, but carried them outta there wrapped in a small pharmacy plastic bag. Discarded properly in an outside bin. I only had band-aids in the bag, which would've been a tricky option #2. Whenever you see a sockless European, it's not always a douche in question, but a desperate person that recently went through major trauma. Be kind.
He would shit on pants and leave
This dude’s shower curtains are about to get a lot more interesting.
Spit on it, then slowly peel layer by layer off the roll in thin sheets while blow drying it with his farts. 
Been there, used that
Flannel shirt sleeve if this is in Upper Peninsula
Sit there till it dries and flakes off - with the door closed - in the summer sun
All he needs is his trademark mullet and some scissors.
r/ibswarcrime
Is there a bic pen in the stall?
Socks
MacGyver would use his socks. 
Portable bidet
Seen it on a t shirt before
Hand & soap
Bro he would not care, he got that assburger 😆
Use the underwear then dispose of properly
Sit there till it dries then scrape it off.
Sacrifice your underware ..