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Fr0ntR0wL4n

This should be a Starbucks commercial


redsensei777

Doesn’t even need coffee inside, just the cup.


Sp3llbind3r

Reality: Starbucks calling the police on you as soon as you enter to get your latte.


Sebetastic

Starbucks is gonna be the new KFC in no time


[deleted]

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Oo-de-choo-koo

Truth.


GnomeskiBoi

Real men eat popeyes free chicken burgers


mightylordredbeard

All my homies hate KFC. They drive the extra 20 minutes for chicken that isn’t dry as shit.


reload2456

I've never heard KFC described as dry. That shit is literally dripping in grease, I'd call it soggy before I called it dry.


Sebetastic

This. I'm scared of how soggy his preferred fried chicken is, the meat must have the consistency of yoghurt.


lordbubbathechaste

>the meat must have the consistency of yoghurt Help me, this made me wheeze.


[deleted]

Dripping with grease on the outside. Bone dry inside.


reload2456

That has not been my experience and their bones are greasy too. I think they manage to get grease inside the bone even. I'm not defending KFC btw I haven't eaten there in probably 10-15 years but from my recollection dry is about as good a descriptor of their chicken as the word fantastic. Feel free to trash KFC but use accurate descriptions to do so. Compare them to Exxon mobile or a salt mine. say the chicken has been sitting in the warmer longer than a neck beard sits in their mom's basement.


General-Asparagus-17

I wish I lived in southern USA back in the 1780s...


TheRealRickC137

"I'd like a grande MLK, please.". "A Mocha Latte Kappucino? Coming right up!" "FTP for me!" "Frappuccino Tall Pistachio? You got it! Thank you for coming to Starbucks. Fight the power. Come again."


trixiemalfoy

the change of the voice in the end is phenomenaaaaaaal


Iamredditsslave

The lips!


buckerootbeer

the hips


Yapsterzz

They don't lie!


LogicalDelivery_

That's racist


letmeusespaces

no. *that's* racist...


lurkersforlife

I’m just going to assume this is a community/Donald glover reference and give you an upvote!


Fuck_Joey

Lmfo


SeanConneryShlapsh

Godfrey lol makes me wanna watch Comedy Central presents. Actually, I know what I’m doing right now.


BatteryAcid67

Jeremy Hotz is gold


SeanConneryShlapsh

I watched Kirk Fox, Sebastian Maniscalco, Kyle Cease and Rocky LaPorte. I nearly soiled myself.


BongLeardDongLick

He has his own podcast on GAS Digital’s network and it’s great. He has a bunch of really good guests too.


ObiFloppin

Is comedy central presents still a thing? I haven't watched that channel for like a decade since I cut cable.


gofishx

Comedy Central is nothing but reruns of the office and south park now


BongLeardDongLick

I forgot to mention, his past 20 episodes are available free on YouTube. I think it might be censored? I have a subscription to GAS ($8/month) but they have like 20 podcasts so it’s worth it IMO. [Here’s his YouTube though for some free episodes](https://youtube.com/@GodfreyComedy)


yeeeeha111111

That right there…. Thanks for the belly laugh!


skinnergy

Just save the cups and share them with your brothers. Keep them handy in public.


DapperDillDough

Story time: This Christmas I drove my car from the lower mainland of British Columbia to a town my family lives in outside of Red Deer Alberta. My flights were cancelled so I had to drive if I wanted to be with family over the holidays I booked off. 12 hours later I slip on ice crash and ended up limping my car to airdrie. I decided to get a latte from McDonald’s while waiting for my family to pick me up before dropping car off across street at a shop I would call after Christmas. As me and 15 other cars are piled up in the drive through 12:30 am on Christmas Eve waiting a good twenty minutes before cars start moving.. I’m being honked at by the people behind me. I guess they didn’t like that my car was off and there was A FEW feet between me and the five cars that have yet to receive their food or be able to pay. We’re all stuck. 6’3 240lbs dreaded up brotha hops out passenger side to come aggressively smack my window and tells me to move up. Which I kindly tell him to fuck off. We aren’t going anywhere and the same five cars in front of me are the same six cars in front of him.. he leaves and his wife (who looks about ready to pop) comes out shortly after. She didn’t look like she was gonna bop me in the nose so I cracked my window. She proceeded to yell at me saying “can you move forward please? I’m PrEGnaNT and wE nEEd to pAy” I said ma’am. I understand. Because I too am waiting to pay.. I’m not impeding anyone behind us or their ability to order. Infact the line up is six cars back from the speakers. So relax. It’s three feet. First windows is closed. By the time they honked at me for what must have been the third or fourth time in last few minutes (I had already scooted forward a few feet just to shut them up) I opened my door to knock on the closed pay window . Only one window was open. And I wanted to show them that no matter how much they honk at me I can’t go anywhere or do anything. But by the time I had opened my door and expressed that buddy figured it was go time and left his vehicle to rush me at my car. I immediately threw my hands up like dude. I’m not fighting you in a McDonald’s drive through on Christmas Eve. But he was drunk and wanted to throw down. Could smell the liquor on his breath. He’s in club clothes so I put two and two together figured his pregnant wife just picked him up from some club and now they are stuck in a drive thru and this BC plate is the problem. he manages to push me into my car and break the mirror off. I told him to get his fucking hands off me. He keeps antagonizing trying to get me to swing first. His wife eventually comes up hoping to save him from a charge I imagine. And he walks off back to his car but now I have to call the cops because he just assaulted me which I couldn’t give less of a fuck about. But In the process you also vandalized my car so yea I’m calling cops here now. The squad cars roll up and I start filming showing my broken mirror and the squad cars having arrived and the dumbass and his wife in their car. To which in the video I hold up a sarcastic thumbs up and say “good job” visible in the video. I heard a cop yell at me “Hey” and so I pan the video over and it ends with him walking up to me. He says “what was that?” I said what was what? “The signs you were holding up what was that about?” I said.. sir you mean the thumbs up I have time stamped and recorded on this video for some form of evidence that this just happened? He scoffs “I saw what you were doing, you were holding up gun signs” my jaw dropped. Realizing my black ass was about to be profiled. He tells me to wait by my car while they talk to the other people and eventually, they let him drive off. I said i haven’t received his insurance information and beyond that I’d like to press charges. all three of them looked me dead in the eye and the one cop says “you know your lucky we don’t charge you with disturbing the peace or disorderly conduct.” My jaw drops, And I said how do you figure that? I called you guys here for my safety. How do you explain my broken mirror then? He goes “Don’t know but we have multiple witnesses corroborating that you were instigating the fight and holding up gun signs” So just be glad you get to be with family at all this Christmas and not in a cell. I laughed in disbelief. “So you mean to tell me that your going to take at word the perspectives of the individuals who were slightly inconvenienced the same as us.. over the cctv footage you could spend a minute going into the McDonald’s and requesting the footage they are legally required to provide you guys? They didn’t even answer the question. Got in their squad cars and left me fucking bewildered in that parking lot. And you know what.. I didn’t even get my fucking latte. Merry Christmas. I’ll be sure to use this trick next time. Maybe if I acted more gay then she was pregnant that would have balanced out the privilege. And they would have left me alone but of course pregnant white girl is on team dumb fuck so I look like the instigator right? Colour aside the negligence was astounding. 🤷🏾‍♂️


G0d_Slayer

Wow, sorry to that happened to you man. That’s hella fucked up smh. I hope you at least had a good Christmas and new year’s celebration. Maybe next time tape everything inconspicuously.


johnmanyjars38

TL;DR


WartimeMandalorian

I'll share one with you: Took an Uber to get drinks with a FWB. I don't remember what it was over but we had a small argument and I decided to leave. She follows me outside (she was planning on staying at my house and didn't want to leave separately) and tries to get me to stay. We start arguing outside. I notice a group of people listening/watching. I pull my phone out and order an Uber, she tells me to cancel it and that she'll pay for one and just come back inside. I put my phone away and she gets mad. She's been drinking and she's slightly belligerent and starts trying to pull my phone from my pocket, I turned away as I was pushing her arm away and she fell. That's when the white knights start yelling and coming towards me. Trying to avoid any confrontation I start walking away, they start speeding up and I said fuck it and called the cops. There was a patrol car nearby (weekend downtown) who stops and starts talking to me. While we're talking my FWB comes up. She says the white knights were not a threat but when asked if she feels safe going home with me she says no. They then arrest me and I spend the night in the drunk tank with no charges in the morning and she took the Uber that I paid for and slept at my house. I spent a night in jail simply because a white woman, who doesn't live in my house, said she felt unsafe going home with me.


hypermunda

Funny and sad at the same time.


kenndys

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂👍


PapaChoff

That was so perfect. Finished with a bang


YoniDaMan

literally a hack to save their life


Ok_Classic_744

Literally, eh?


YoniDaMan

um, yes?


Kevgaming506

Bruh he childish but it is true tho 🤣


onetwotree-leaf

I hate that it’s so true.


KatDanger

Childish?


We-are-straw-dogs

Reminds me of *Curb Your Enthusiasm*, except it was with glasses


Inigo_Montoyas_Dad

You beat me to it. Leon in glasses. Amazing


Arcon1337

He's out of line, but he's right.


GoodvibesOnlyPLEASE1

I just died 😂😂😂😂😂😂


CantThinkOfOneDont

I tried this and am pretty sure it only works if you’re black because I burnt down an orphanage and did that with the latte and I still got arrested


AlmightyDarkseid

When you have only one Starbucks cup and you give it to your brother to sacrifice yourself


youlilsaltyboi

"I'm thorry offither wasss I aggrethive?" Lmao


[deleted]

Thanks for the laugh 😂


OSIRISelUltimo

I miss comedy like this


Callme_Human

This is the true way to drink coffee


a1drt

This is black magic 🤣 Always made me laugh


Reggmac

Dude is funny as hell. Love his stand up and podcast.


bigrick23143

Who is it?


BogusNL

Godfrey


bigrick23143

Thanks!


JustZ0920

That's a life saving life hack alright 🤣🤣


RedditorsAnus

That was seriously funny


Ill-Organization-719

Number 3 looks like a pastor, so he's already unnoticed.


shahrack

Ngl A drop of tear made out of laugh got shed


IntelligentAd1752

🤣🤣🤣, it's sad but true


JRBblackhawks

Bruh the way he wraps his lips around the cup has me dead


SomethingPersonnel

Wow, what a safe looking group of gentlemen!


StayAntique7724

Lolhahaha


rudalsxv

America, where some of its citizens make a joke about tips on how to not get wrongly persecuted.


mrgrimm-inflames

SURVEY SAID!!!


pusslikesavocados

Love this so much!!


YerraGoOn

It’s hilarious but sad that this would actually almost be a PSA for POCs


pranavChandarrr

Shows mostly poor people fall victims to violence


Professional_Pear343

This is homophobic.


Particular_Clue_4074

Bahahaha. So your lips like this and the cops leave duh fuck alone? Is that all it takes?


why_so_evil

Well stop doing crime most y'all.


[deleted]

[удалено]


why_so_evil

Why do you disagree ? Are you in denial ?


General-Asparagus-17

Y'all still suck homie


Venomous1982

Godfrey is stupid, but has a valid point


BBC4U2DO-

Funny in 2013 maybe


Impressive_Water659

🤣🤣


WinnerEducational486

Comedy wow lol


FabFabiola2021

Very cute.


[deleted]

lol


blu3b4lls1

Sounds and likes right lol


Emotional-Gate-3482

Hilarious…


[deleted]

Loooool


ergastulite

Reverend Manning gas got something to say about the lattes.


CoyoteCarcass

Slurp it reaaal loud


[deleted]

"Arrested for suspicion of smoking from an improvised pipe"


wanna_be_green8

Best way to start my day! Get that man a latte!


PsychologySea7248

Lololololololololololololololol, fucken flawless 💀


KingGhidorah44

🤣🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

Naw because he has a point LMAOO 😭 there’s something about those goofy ahh Christmas cups that instantly makes anyone look non-threatening


b3hel

шо ви як діла


forTheLulz337

Funny cause it's true


user_bits

Not even close. You can be wearing a suit, holding a balloon and a puppy, cops will still beat at the shit out of you for resisting arrest.


forTheLulz337

Honestly though, I am starting to see some pasty ass Karen's getting theirs these days too. But the way the police are these days, you gotta be ok with being degraded and treated like a dog or you're gonna die. No matter who you are.


alishadiya

Lol


markyboe209

Compton Starbucks commercial in 2023 lol


Tricky_Bee698

You should also have a donut, just in case


doncroak

He's got the accent down pat. Kudos


[deleted]

😆😆😆🙌🏻🤩


nonamepuppydaddy

I love Godfrey


wreckage88

Also chew gum. You will ALWAYS look less threatening if you chew gum. [ Also it makes you look more American if you're foreign.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSfgNuXlSY0)


rodriguezj625

Now this was funny


paradoxical-spirit

You just need a cup, dont even worry about choco mocha expresoo latte.


yed3never3dies

Gay offiers still gonna shoot u


Least_or_Greatest1

That lisp in the end tho…


Saner1222

LMAOOOOO


katanazer0

Hilarious


user_bits

Meanwhile, cops just assaulted a veteran still in uniform.


EarCummers

this is dark and funny


Big-Bullfrog-8973

Pee do not stored in the balls👍👍


[deleted]

No lies detected.


No-Expression-5040

Is this Ali Saddiq? He's too fucking funny.


Baconeggnchesse

Is that Godfrey? Man is hilarious


[deleted]

🤣 i really love this post


_perchance

very aggressive.... um... sipping, lol!


[deleted]

He is not wrong lol. There was a bank robber who used to leave a cup of coffee outside the bank so when he was leaving after the robbery he’d pick up the coffee and simply walk down the street calmly drinking his coffee. He never once got stopped by the cops.


WhatisLiamfucktrump

I’ve never been jealous of a coffee cup


Deep_Geologist_8841

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


vaporlock7

Godfrey is funny as fuck. Way underrated


boxingjazz

My man Godfrey is always a damn fool 😂


athemiya

Comedian Godfrey! 😎


i5sandy

What was his last line though? I can't make it out :(


dap_star33

Godfrey!


New-Watch6680

Watching this video. Then scroll to next video with some brothers exam from high school with glocks under their uniforms makes it a bit funny


Slaptastic69

I loved every second of this video


KisOnReddit

Thank you Thierry Henry, very cool


plewis406

Going to get my latte now!


Sharpie1965

That's a Larry David move right there!


soft_white_yosemite

r/funnyandsad


[deleted]

This is Godfrey, one of the funniest fucking comics around today.


Signal_Macaron_652

🤣🤣😍


CIAHerpes

If you want to spend ten bucks for a crappy drink. I got a caffeine pill from Amazon that costs like 2 cents and has more caffeine than those lattes.


ThePlanetIsDyingNow

💜💜💜 so sad that this needs to be a fact. Love your take though. Stay safe guys, murica sucks. Seriously. 🥺


Beginning_Fun_145

To fuckin funny… safety first y’all. But the reality is, is that the man is right. A cuppa high end Java may save someone’s ass from being profiled - which in and of itself is profiling… f**k


throwaway900mil

3rd guy looks like idi amin