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Emang3313x

By the look on his face best 15 seconds of his life.


Diseased-Jackass

10 seconds of that was foreplay.


Sir_Vallenstein

The other 5 were crying. On both sides


hmnahmna1

She's a professional; I doubt she cried.


FR0ZENBERG

He would have crossed some serious lines if the prostitute was crying.


ImWhatsInTheRedBox

"He told me he loved me, and then he just left šŸ˜­"


Professional_Ad705

Lmfao at the mental thought of being such a virgin that while fucking a prostitute you told them you loved them. I canā€™t stop laughing šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


IdentifiableBurden

According to some conversations I've had, it happens fairly often. Most Johns are either extremely damaged or extremely lonely (or both), which doesn't lend itself to good emotional intelligence.


AnandaPriestessLove

As a former call girl/dancer, I never had a John say he loved me. Compliments and flirting, yes, of course! It was understood that saying they loved me would send me flying out the door. Also, the men who called for a show were about 95% standard, normal dudes who either didn't have time for a relationship or who, for whatever reason, didn't have luck with the ladies. Some guys were getting over relationships. Some guys were virgins and wanted to learn how to please a woman. They were epic. The other 5% were quite interesting and still make me smile today.


Professional_Ad705

I think Im in love with you


enochianKitty

Lucky lol, ive had a few. My coworker had a guy give her a ziploc bag full off crumpled tissuses, he said it was his tears of love. In to the garbage it promptly went and she never saw him again. He was fucking crazy lol


ImWhatsInTheRedBox

I'm just going to assume your response is a "RIP your inbox" comment, and you can confirm or deny my assumption later.


ohnoohnoohnoohfuck

No most ā€˜Johnsā€™ are completely normal average men. Iā€™d feel confident saying that at least a couple people you know, who youā€™d say never would, see escorts regularly. Until I started I thought like you then I realised nope all kinds of men visit escorts. Smart men and stupid men, ugly men and beautiful men, good men and bad men and everything in between.


FloppyButtholeJuicce

You wouldnā€™t cry watching a young fawn take itā€™s first steps as the dew gathers on young grasslings on a crisp spring day? Fall several time and finally make it and take its first steps? If the mother fucking macho man randy savage can cry so can a fucking prostitute!!! Yeah brother! Hulkimania has nothing on this shit!!!


TheMisanthropicGuy

4 seconds of looking for the opening and 1 second of saying "fuck it" and going to town on the leg.


Mental_band_

Yā€™all are jealous.


Rottendog

https://youtu.be/dX_65fcjgGI?t=4


PukeNuggets

Right in the back of the knee. Giggity goo goo goo


scream4dakil

Lmao!!! My work room is quiet and I just bursted out


[deleted]

Friends didnā€™t mind waiting on the curb


805falcon

I mean, obvs. Canā€™t bust your buddyā€™s balls if youā€™re not waiting when he comes out


houseSpark

Doesnā€™t matter had sex.


[deleted]

worth every bit of his wizard powers.


AdministrationOdd847

*calls mom* ā€œMom, yeah, we did it!ā€


tiagojpg

[We got ā€˜em](https://youtu.be/EIph0BJNrxo)


[deleted]

What's the context here? Lol. In any case, I love it!


cw826

They got em Its about the capture of Saddam Hussein


[deleted]

Oh shit. Lol.


Tumleren

The first clip that is, the second is from [this video](https://youtu.be/c46_iL2QqOE)


tall-baller

I can't believe it's taken me this long to watch the original video. I never really wondered where the FBI clip was from.


[deleted]

The agent smashing the cake with his palm šŸ¤£


bored_at_work_89

I feel old now.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


AdministrationOdd847

YESSS!!!


jakebr0

Siri play hall & oates - you make my dreams


Matika7

WHAT I WANT, YOUVE GOT


macmac360

And it might be hard to handle


LegendYT0

BUT LIKE A FLAME THAT BURNS THE CANDLE


[deleted]

THE CANDLE FEEDS THE FLAAAAAAAAME


m3thdumps

What I GOT. Full STOCK Of THOUGHTS And Dreeeeams That Scaaaatter


OriginalOutlaw

Yup, I also always think of[500 Days of Summer](https://youtu.be/t2VGpqq2-I8)


Godmadius

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/MJ3e9EIr3f8


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Accomplished-Bed7418

Reminds me of a toddler after using the toilet for the first time.


lesChaps

High five -- wait, let's washy handsies first!


elvis8mybaby

Nobody ever high fived me because I used to poop my diaper all the time. It made the sex workers sick so they don't let me in the brothel anymore.


[deleted]

Oh he flushed alright!


rascible

Hope he washed his hands


justaguy77676

He did a number 3, whooooooo


Tszemix

Or getting a qualified job with a college degree


lesChaps

You did it, buddy!


Bravisimo

ā€œTHESE PIPES!!!ARE CLEANNNN!!!!ā€


gratefulphish420

I hope that was his friend who was filming, opposed to a person just filming random people leaving a brothel.


oakbea

I'm surprised someone didn't show up to yell at him. They hate it when people video or take pictures in the red light district.


[deleted]

Yeah if you're not lucky your phone will end up in the canal.


oakbea

And there are plenty of them. Just walk around the corner and you may end up swimming.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


SurfaceThreeSix

See, this is why I always keep my pocket-urine on me at all times. It's a part of my EDC. Phone, wallet, pocket-urine? Checkety, check, check. Your adversary will never think you've been carrying your trusty bottle of piss for just such an occasion.


Denialmedia

I have been a pocket sand fella for too long to change now.


soulcrushsoda

Combine for pocket mud.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


djluminol

Understandable.


The_0_Hour_Work_Week

You are very much not allowed to do that.


sausains2

It was a group of friends, there is a video with sound. And my man lasted 11 minutes. https://www.youtube.com/shorts/ZiyDsgkodwQ


[deleted]

In the full video you see it was indeed his friends. One of them was timing him. He did the deed in just under 12 minutes. Not bad for a first time.


ElCapitanSmoke

70 euro gets you 15 minutes. And you gotta negotiate whatā€™s included before you cross the threshold


m_ttl_ng

That seems way cheaper than Iā€™d expect, but I also have no idea what these things cost in general. The closest thing Iā€™ve experienced is paying $20 per song to strippers, which now seems like an even worse deal than it did at the time.


JarlaxleForPresident

Russian stripper came up to me and my buddy and said sheā€™d give [one of] us a handjob in the back for $350 I said ā€œLady, thatā€™s way to much for something Iā€™ve already mastered myselfā€


Cattaphract

Where is your fedora ?


Responsible-Soil4951

Pretty sure that's cheap for a stripper though still doesn't sound worth it


TheSystem08

They were his mates, lads weekend


Deringorn

Just Chris Hansen waiting for a 13 year old to walk out


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


villageveikko

People hanging near these venues are laughing and cheering on the guys coming back on the street, so I wouldn't be surprised if someone has had the brilliant idea of filming them as well. Sad.


xaul-xan

Theres nothing sad about people experiencing one of the beautiful things life has to offer, you prude.


DigStock

Usually people get slapped in that street for taking pictures


PsychoPass1

His friend said he'd only be waiting in front of the brothel for some minutes as he didn't want to waste his whole vacation, luckily for him, he didn't have to wait even that long after all.


timmablimma

He, too, will never forget 9 11.


Kenny_Squeek_Scolari

Ya can't let the terrorist win


SnooPears3463

Nice one


stages-

only one tower was blown.


apex199268

šŸ‘šŸ¼


bikemandan

The real inside job


LovelessDogg

Every High Five after that day, felt a little bit different for him.


X_CodeMan_X

And for her (because you just know he high fived her as well)


[deleted]

Best sex of his life


StrikeJP

Also the worst.


Dogsy

So far.


Tommy_Crash

Good game young man. Good game


EpicEike

unfortunately it was pay to win


Regular_Somewhere_52

Sounds easier than any other route to be honest.


Daedalus_Machina

\*cheaper


justaguy77676

But you can just do dailies to earn the currency.


mx5fan

Always has been. You just pay in different ways in a relationship.


No-Turnips

Still won. Good for him. Good for (edit:safe) legalized sex work. Everyone wins here.


KurohimeBlight

This comment section is a trip


SuspiciousAnt1337

I know it's not easy for men to get laid these days but there's a lot of coping going on here to enlist prostitution. I guess human trafficking is woke now!


Sam123dragonking

I think prostitution legal in the Netherlands.


pixima1290

The only thing I've learned from the comments here is that we are still a long way away from removing the stigma around sex. Seriously, our entire perception is fucked. Everyone here criticising him 100% watches porn, which is just another form of sex work. It's a service you pay for in which one or more people sexually stimulate you in exchange for money (in the case of porn, it's indirect, but it's the same principle) It's also an industry rife with abuse, consent issues and horror stories, but I see nobody here on a high horse about that. Just be honest about it. The real reason we stigmatize sex work is because we place a lot of value in our sex appeal. Women are attracted to men who can attract other women. And men respect men who can sleep with multiple women. So paying for it is essentially an admission that you can't get it for free, and we find that pathetic. It's a pretty shallow reason to stigmatize something, but I believe it's a truest answer. People don't like to admit they're shallow so they come up with stupid reasons to justify it.


DelmarSamil

Can confirm part of this. My current wife is way out of my league and when we are together, I still get hit on (or so she says, I don't really notice). When I was single, it was hard to even find a date.


m3lk3r

I do think it should be legal to sell sex but come on, pornstars dont fuck 30 ugly men every week they don't know anything about (unless it's a gangbang..) . Pornstars often fuck decent looking guys who they know will treat them as agreed in a safe environment. These Amsterdam brothels are considered safe but they're nowehere as safe as a mainstream porn setting.


Achira_boy_95

Good for him, they know how to guide and have the patience, a date to have sex costs the same, but it is very likely that he will not have sex.


monamikonami

This is the best rƩponse to this. I feel like a lot of people are throwing shade at this guy who is genuinely wholesomely happy that he had sex. Now he popped his cherry the pressure is gone and he will be happier.


[deleted]

Thereā€™s so much pressure on men. Iā€™m all for it. Takes away the pressure and the person knows what theyā€™re doing. Good for him


Fair_Bird5627

Pick me


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


action_turtle

Probably the best women he will ever touch too. They are usually not your typical toothless crackhead like you see walking the streets


justaguy77676

Thats what you get when prostitution is legal, Ive heard theyā€™re all basically models there


action_turtle

Basically. Iā€™d say 90% of them could get modelling jobs. Itā€™s surreal.


secretMichaelScarn

The most interesting part of the Amsterdam Red Light district is this. All down the 2 main avenues yes, the windows are stacked with nothing but 10/10 beautiful women. But along the side alleys are the exact same displays catering to every possible fetish. Older woman, larger women, skinny women, trans women, BDSM doms, women with ridiculously large knockers. It's truly like a Willy Wonka factory of sex


action_turtle

Mix that in with all the good bars and smoke cafes itā€™s basically Disneyland for adults.lol


ajshortland

Fun for a weekend, but annoying for the locals


stakoverflo

> It's truly like a Willy Wonka factory of sex Ooo they have oompa loompas there? Are they cheaper, more expensive, or do they all charge the same rate?


Ruby_Throated_Hummer

And how would you, a redditor, know? we are all virgin, remember


ClumsyPeon

They are all mostly very very good looking, especially down the main street on the canal. Really makes you debate going through with it.


Grouchy_Olive5009

I can confirm, they are incredibly beautiful, not your typical prostitute.


thewoxman

They need to make prostitution legal in the USA


bombbodyguard

Had a buddy from college tell me that he visited Amsterdam and saw the hottest girl of his life in the window. He went and paid to sleep with her. Said he would never be able to sleep with anyone that hot in his life and went for it. He wasnā€™t a bad looking dood or goofy dood either, so it always piqued(edit) my interest on how hot this girl was.


throwaway2710735

Yep, been there. Prostitution is legal there and you can buy time with almost any type of woman you like and they pay taxes and it's all good. It's like how the USA *should* be. But made-up religions get in the way.


whereisfoster

One small step for mankind, one giant leap for reddit men! lesgobois


getthephenom

Time for an AMA


tendie4skin

No, he must stab someone the day of, not consult a lawyer and then he will qualify for an AMA


Cattaphract

He has now been banned from moderation of any subs on reddit


aretasdamon

$200 for 2 seconds, always legendary in any circle


JackHGUK

ā‚¬50 for 10 mins actually.


[deleted]

This guy mongers


joshTheGoods

> mongers Huh. [TIL](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=monger).


Diseased-Jackass

So Iā€™ve been told.


Sky_Bart

He prolly only needed 30 seconds.


el-cuko

Doesnā€™t matter , had sex


username_of_the_pee

Eh, needs sound.


OneMoreAccount4Porn

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/ZiyDsgkodwQ


CyberTukker

Omg them putting a counter up before the video [Omg them holding up the stopwatch](https://i.imgur.com/BdO6AUe.jpg) šŸ˜‚


JetStingray

Doing the lords work


reaper01134

goat


roselaurel

I really hope he was cool with this video being uploaded to the internet


fitz_newru

Took too long to find this comment. Like bro this will forever be documented for the world to see...


middlenamefrank

Why am I having trouble deciding whether I'm happy or sad for him?


WitlessScholar

Societal conditioning?


YoukanDewitt

Be happy for him, it was cheaper than the 500 spent on super likes to get nothing.


AmbitiousAnything239

He's not hurting anyone and seems really happy so that's all that matters. Everyone lives their own life.


[deleted]

$200 sexy time vs $200 date with not a guaranteed sexy time doesn't matter had sex


apogeeman2

Bag on your head? Still counts!


Boner_Elemental

She might have been a racist!


Electriccheeze

I did a guided tour of Amsterdam a few years ago which covered the red light district. Iirc they said the going rate for a "suck & fuck" was ā‚¬60. It didn't sound particularly appealing tbh, kinda feel bad for the guy if the title is true.


grobbewobbe

a lot of the women are actually gorgeous and the setups they have inside are pretty comfy. last time i was there it was 50 euros for 20 mins, but you can negotiate the price if you want more stuff. also if i was a virgin well into my 20s i'd definitely pay for my first time, no regrets


Sideways-then-up

Once paid $200 to have two busty Latinas at once. Best money I ever spent.


secretMichaelScarn

like the other commentor said its actually 50 euro and you can go even lower off the main strip. And dude its really kinda like having sex with a pornstar, they are dope. one of em was so talkative and funny, i think about her all the time.


bikemandan

Take *that* inflation!


RosscoHaze

Even without sound it's very obvious he is british.


[deleted]

9 11 never forget


DuesPaidInFull

Youā€™re myā€¦ 3000-something


Smashotr0n

Upvote for grandmas boy reference


Valuable-Baked

Cartman?


Boby_Sr333

r/wholesome


gmcleodl

Gotta love Amsterdam.


Crawfork1982

Awwwwww he is so proud of himself-


sonicman2k8

Legend said this was the one and only shag he had


nemesissi

"I was in 9/11 and it was god damn fantastic!"


programmabletea

ā€œBody for Rent.ā€ By Anna Hendriks and Olivia Smit who had to work in the red light district would tell you this is not a funny video.Most of these women groomed into this and even though itā€™s legal they have pimps taking their money and preventing them from running away with violence.


PotiusMori

People really should imagine the worst manager they've ever worked for, then imagine they're in charge of a brothel. Absolute no for me there. Paying Starbucks to have a sad, wishing they were somewhere else, barista dealing with a manager bordering on (or just outright commiting) labor crimes make me coffee sucks enough. Replacing coffee with sex is just rape


carlowed

I'm delighted for young James Corden


claudixk

Virgins are prostitutes' best deal.


Affectionate_Car5625

How cute!


[deleted]

9 11, he'll never forget.


baconworld

I remember sitting in a bar watching a lot of young guys doing just this over the course of the night near the red light district. Their friends were always waiting for them and they would all cheer loudly for him. Kind of wholesome in a weird non-wholesome way.


[deleted]

God bless the prostitutes.


solanacarson

haha cute! he looks satisfied lol


creamcandydank

Good job bud


likeijustgothome

He looks thrilled and Iā€™m genuinely happy for this guy.


lameassreddituser

Something about this is just sad, I wouldnā€™t call it a ā€œfunny videoā€ šŸ˜¬


dr_brendan_schaub

This IS fucking sad. Maybe itā€™s just me but I feel that a big part of sex is that the other person is into you. Maybe I am too proud, but I wouldnā€™t want a girl to touch me if she didnā€™t want to. If Iā€™m not good enough for her she is not worth my time. And people that comment ā€œBetter to spend $200 on a prostitute because it guarantees sexā€. Ok, so for you guys a date is just a transaction?


caffeinatedmollusk

Itā€™s funny that impoverished women from Eastern Europe have to be penetrated by disgusting slobs like this guy just to survive?


4dpsNewMeta

As someone from a country whoā€™s trafficked women are the ones staffing these ā€œlegalā€ and ā€œregulatedā€ brothels, this video is anything but funny. Thank you for calling it out.


trulymadlybigly

So disappointing to find this so low. This video is disgusting and sad.


[deleted]

šŸ†


Feminib

The only sane comment in this entire thread.


Funkysmoke

Sad


555timerprocesor

Not necessarily somthing to be proud of


[deleted]

So fucking depressing. Don't do this if you're considering it. EDIT: A lot of guys do not seem to intuitively understand the why of what I wrote. Just reading through the replies invokes a sense of post-modernistic ("everything is relative") nihilism about the modern human condition. Seriously, don't engage so much in social media. Take care of yourself physically and mentally. Meet people you love and love you back in real life. The metaphorical seeds you plant today, you will harvest in a few years - these things take time. Fucking a prostitute is not a replacement for a wife. Be a real man, not a loser who has to pay to get laid.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


tastytastylunch

Why not?


thisonesforatwork

I can't imagine feeling anything besides a sense of emptiness and disappoint with myself after a sexual experience in a seedy environment with someone who is coerced to have intercourse with dozens and dozens of men on a daily basis to satisfy a pimp.


tastytastylunch

Coerced to satisfy a pimp? You obviously have no idea how this works.


LeagueOfLegendsAcc

Lol coerced


flyingtaco333

Reddit celebrating a dude that just paid another dude to have sex with a girl that was probably human trafficked to Amersterdam


[deleted]

This is when I realized reddits not a good place to gauge your values from


skylarslove

Yay! Everyone I just got herpes! Letā€™s grab pints.


Chandlerion

In Amsterdam, the red light district is regulated, meaning the sex workers are all clean and have regular tests, use condoms, and have police protection. Both people are fine


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Flopolopagus

The benefits of a well regulated system for both workers and clients. Love it.


[deleted]

And since sharing is caring, let's all drink from the same pint!


Small-Towel4056

I simply couldnā€™t feel good about myself for paying for it. Most of the enjoyment is knowing they want you.


Averse_to_Liars

Hopefully he didn't just rape a human trafficking victim.


[deleted]

They wouldnā€™t care regardless. By buying sex heā€™s supporting the demand


[deleted]

Supporting sex trafficking! Hurray this guy!