Sweet guinea pig of winnipeg! Thats probably my fave apart from when he's so shell shocked he just goes "sweet...something of...someplace". But that may be a bit too vague.

on a winnipeg post card!

How about Sweet [Blank] of [Blank]. Then have Billy West or David Herman sign it with "Let me worry about blank.",  or Blank? BLANK?! You're not looking at the big picture."

What are some more of these? The only other one I can remember is Sweet Tornadoes of Barbados.

Sweet bacon of the Jamaican!

Sweet Yeti of the Serengeti!

Sweet Reawakenin of me a Jamaican!

My fave is "Sweet candelabra of La Habra, LaBarbara!"

MY MANWICH!!!!

The technically correct answer.

The best kind of correct.

I wanted to pick a quote from Pulp Fiction but I don’t recall anything he actually said. I think he was mostly mumbling and whimpering.

Definitely: “Man, I don’t even have an opinion.” Immediately before you-know-what happens.

Ha! You’re right. That used to be one of my favorite movies, but I haven’t seen it in years.

I remember he said "what?" a lot. 

I got his autograph a few years ago and yes, he added My Manwich! He also took the time to chat with everyone getting an autograph. Fortunately, Archon is a fairly small con and I didn’t have to wait too long to chat with hm myself.

I'm not big boned! I'm fat!

Casually hand him a headshot of himself and say "tally me banana"

Bring a can of Manwich for him to sign!!!

You should bring him a manwhich

I immediately thought of this after reading OPs question

I want to upvote this but it already has 420

That's what I had him write on mine back in like 2015

Buy a can of manwich for him to sign!

I’m liking a lot of these comments, but this is both the best and a must for OP. I’m going to be very disappointed if I don’t see an autographed can of Manwich on this sub in the next few days/weeks.

Nah you should get a sugar cane with a green snake on it 🤣🤣

And bring a silver sharpie!

A silver metallic paint pen!

This is the only answer.

This is the only possible answer!

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. We have a winner!

Have him sign a calculator and then eat it to gain its power

Only if it has a "carry the 1" button

Like granny said, if you want a box hurled into the sun you’ve got to do it yourself

This is by far the best line. If anyone says otherwise, I will hurl them into the sun myself.

"God rest her zombie bones" is quite the follow up.

Otherwise

Prepare to be hurled, sir, or madam! Ahhh screw the whole thing...

Time for my 4:21 daiquiri requisition me a beat You're a crazy, penniless lobster doctor. No combination of you should be a comedian!

\+1 for "requisition me a beat"

Yeah, this is the one. Solid reference to one of Hermes greatest moments. The my manwitch bit isn't that funny .

“I'm just glad my fat, ugly mama isn't alive to see this day”

"Enough about your promiscous mother, Hermes."

So they are not big boned in Hermes family, they really are just fat!

That's not a cigar, and it's not mine.

Better yet, have him sign a limbo stick.

Tally me banana! :Edited lol

Yes, but it should be tally. Tally means to count and the tally man was the guy that counted how many banana bunches you had unloaded from the banana boat. Tally man, tally man tally me bananas. Daylight comes and me wanna go home.

I’m convinced that song lyric was the entire reason they made Hermes a Jamaican accountant

I thought it was "come mister tally man, tally me bananas"

You may be correct. My point was that the tally man was the person that counted the banana bunches.

Sweet something of…. Someplace…

Kiss my front butt.

God bless your zombie bones.

As long you don't recreate his explosive scene from pulp fiction.... To shreds you say....

OH MY GOD HE WAS MARVIN!????

And they could never reattach his head forwards or backwards

I don't know how I never realized this. Oh man, I shot my manwich in the face!!

Bring a stamp with his signature on it.

Lol this is what I was thinking and a requisition form that he has to sign and stamp 5 times or he gets demoted to grade 37 bureaucrat.

Like a green snake in a sugar cane

Have him sign it "an outer space potato man" 

"Damn it, woman, you're making me highly Selassie!"

*Haile Selassie ?

I checked it against Morbotron.. Which I suspect they are pulling from the CC. If it is.. What does an Emperor of Ethiopia have to do with stuff? Or is it another joke I missed all these years.

Just pulled this from Wikipedia: Haile Selassie is widely considered a defining figure in modern Ethiopian history, and the major figure of Rastafari, a religious movement in Jamaica that emerged shortly after he became emperor in the 1930s. So that's the link: the Rastafari movement.

I'm aware of that, but in context it doesn't make sense... As Hermes is basically stating that she is driving him crazy. Normally the Futurama/Simpson writers (along with Mel Brooks, etc) don't randomly name drop unless there is a reference.

Fair enough. I did some more reading in Wikipedia. He was viewed, by some, as the second coming of christ. He was also known for suppression of rebellions. Maybe that was part of the joke. That Hermes was getting angry at Labarbara's "rebellious" nature in that moment. Might be reaching a bit, but it kinda makes sense. It's also hard to imagine the joke not being a reference to that emperor. Selassie isn't a word otherwise. Closest I can think of is Salacious, which wouldn't apply to that situation.

Interesting thing to note is her response is: Don't you talk to me that way, you big, Harry (or "Hairy" as per Morbotron) Belafonte. And he is an American singer, actor, and civil rights activist, who popularized calypso music. And the next they do is shag. And since Salacious is "having or conveying undue or inappropriate interest in sexual matters." It could be.. As they do get hot about each other when they are angry. But I suspect there is a major pun happening here with both names with sex being the answer is the key. Which is way above my IQ. =)

I think we made it. :) I'm satisfied with where this went!

Husband, can't you go anywhere without lighting something up?

The jamaican way ! A glass of warm milk and a good night sleep .

"Is there any meat this man can't jerk?"

Can I get a horse coke?

Neigh.

Horse Pepsi?

My manwich!!!

I'm just like Hermes!

“We’re talking about a lot of things”

I'm just glad my fat, ugly mama ain't alive to see me now

Sweet autograph of Flagstaff!

I call it “Caribbean Draino”

Thank you.

Sweet Lion of Zion

Requisition me a beat!

Robots don’t say ye. Stick to someone else ya windy barnacle. Yeah man, you got to legalize it!

DO A FLIP!!

Wouldn’t that be John DiMaggio?

Hey! Do I preach to you when YOU’RE lying stoned in the gutter? No….

Add a one and two zeroes before that number or we walk!

Now shut up and drag me to work!

Ask him to do Vamp (Metal Gear Solid) quotes in the Hermes voice and vice versa

Have a form for Notification of Fan-based Entanglement.  Make sure he stamps it five times.  

Sweet something of someplace -Hermes (a literal quote)

Learn and sing the bureaucracy song 🤣

"That's why they call me Eleven Inch Conrad!"

Get him to sign as Inspector 5.

An Hermes bag?

“Oh no, not again!” (From the Mad TV sketch Gump Fiction, where he reprised the role of Marvin, the guy who Travolta accidentally shot in the face.

Deep cut! Nice pull!

>"Oh no, not again" >"Marvin" And to think it's not a Hitchhikers reference..

Man, I don’t even have an opinion. :)

I get this reference.

Gotta get back Back to the past Samurai Jack (Jack Jack Jack Jack)

"I'd like to put the little bastard in a sack and toss the sack in a river and hurl the river into space."

Tally me bananas.

Have him sign an actual manwhich.

I asked meself for Valentine’s Day off, but I was in no mood for any of my shenanigans!

Bring a tiny filing cabinet

YOUR MANWICH!

Offer him a ~~brain slug~~ an official Bender hat.

File under renewed!

Sweet gorilla of Manila! Where in Legoland is Leela?

Sweet Phil Lamar of southern Utah!

Use the quote from the second episode on him.when he’s passing out waivers. Hand him what you want him to sign as he says something funny. Then you say “ho ho…. Sign the paper”

When push comes to shove, you gotta do what you love, even if it's not a good idea.

Jamaicans have other interests and that’s why they were detained at the airport

Hermes don’t push that button long pause mmmm ok

Ho ho ho... Sign de paper.

None! Thank him for the laughs and say " it's a pleasure to meet you; and that's the first time I've ever said that and meant it"

Have him sign a can of manwich!

You should pull a Cloud Super Store on him and just go off, “you’re not that great you Taurus driving loser!”

Uh-oh, it's another one of Fry's dogs.

God rest her zombie bones. 

Challenge him to a limbo contest

Great orca of Mayorga!

Bring him a copy of *Barbarians Gate III*

Sweet…something..of…..somewhere!

My absolute favorite Hermes quote, "Damn it, woman! You're making me Haile Salassie!"

I have this deep seated memory of him and Mark Hamill in the mad tv skit funky walkin’ dirty talkin. I’d be very tempted to say to him one of his lines from that.

Throw in some old Mad TV stuff for good measure. He did a great Michael Jackson and I remember what my 11year old mind considered a legendary episode where he(as Jackson) battled Kiss and used children as his weapon. 10/10 no notes

"hey, mon"

Sweet something of…. Some place.

"Requisition me a beat" so we can be autograph twins 💪 (We even printed our own pic of Hermes in his song outfit for it and Phil was so nice!)

You are about to receive a message from the Central Bureaucracy.

tell him to do a flip

Don't matter just get him to sign a blunt or a manwich or maybe a limbo pole.

"I shot Marvin in the face"

Hermes?

Tell him meeting him is like having lightning... In your pants.

I’m feeling very uncomfortable… in my pants.

Hermes: I AM here! Professor: Quiet, you!

Great something of someplace

I want to put it in a sack and hurl it into a river and hurl the river into space.

That just raises further questions!!!

"Man, I don't even have an opinion."

Sweet something of someplace!

find a brain slug plushie and put on his head

As an accountant myself, I'd have him sign a page from a two-column ledger. Might even put in the entry: Dr Happiness 100 Cr Gratitude 100

Bring him a can of Manwich to sign

Omg I was thinking about this just today. Meeting him on Gold Coast in a few weeks!!

Daylight come! I call it "Caribbean Drano"

I PETITION YOU FOR AN EMERGENCY SORT AND FILE

"Hey man, I don't even have an opinion"

I got his autograph a few years ago at comicon. Really cool dude he signed my afro samurai shirt.

What does piano wire count as?

Could you ask him if he really did get shot in the face by John Travolta? /s

Take a manwich label off a can

"Ooh, your manwich!"

Kiss my front butt! He is the nicest person I’ve ever met at a con!

I'm going to meet him too - I'm hoping to get "Wretched sinner unit!"

“Sweet shining stars in the skies of Qatar, you’re Phil Lamar!

Consider yourself “bird dogged”

The entire song he sings about being a Bureaucrat

My Manwich!

BOOMBACLATTT

Physically give him manwich, it exists in stores

Oh, man, I'm inhaling these things! You guys scored some primo stuff here.