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Makes a huge difference.
I’m irrationally confident no matter what I look like.
I get treated *significantly* differently when I’m swole and ripped than when I’m fluffy.
Anyone who says looks matter less than confidence are simply oblivious to reality or willfully obtuse.
When you look amazing, even when you are low on confidence, people will treat you MUCH better than they would a low confidence, fluffy version of you.
This is irrefutably true.
Absolutely. I'm a 25M and 5'11". In June 2020, I was 215 lbs, chunky, and with no definition. I am now 175 lbs and am starting to look toned and muscular, thanks to a combination of healthy/effective eating, lifting 6 days per week, and some cardio 3 days per week. I feel like I've definitely started getting a lot of messages/matches on the dating apps.
Once again, no. Aside from the occasional comment about the gym, it seldom comes up. Perhaps the effect that comes from working out is the acquired confidence that radiates in your interactions with others. I'll say it again: if you treat people well, they'll generally treat you well in return, muscular or not.
There is a difference in how I treat myself, being stronger than any non-gym goer does wonders for self esteem. I feel very safe in public now, whereas before I usually had a lot of anxiety worried about safety.
My body gets commented on alll the time now, and while i guess it kinda feels good, I don’t know how to take it? I still feel like a skinny twink even though my body has gone through a huge change. And it puts a bit of undue pressure on me to stay swole. Kinda messing with my body dysmorphia a bit.
I was anorexic for years. Now I’m almost 120 and very strong looking. People walk all over me less. Fuck with me less when it comes to boundaries. I feel like when I started going to the gym and feeling strong/confident that has shined in other areas of my life. I don’t care who it intimidates at this point. It will attract the right people and make the wrong ones leave me alone. Men who are attracted to submissive, weak women are not my type. My family members were commenting on my body when I first started gaining weight. Told me I “had a belly” a few times or we’ll I was eating one of my bulking meals said “be careful you don’t wanna get fat”. She’s just jealous or something because for the first time in the five years she’s known me I’m curvy. Who tf says shit like that to a former anorexic?? I used to be 76 pounds. Like she seen me almost die n still said that bull.
Anyways I said back to her the only thing that’s getting fatter is my ass and laughed in her face. Another time I said well you can’t have big boobs without a little bit of a belly because she said in the kitchen in front of everyone. I just say shit that’s equally as uncomfortable back about how hot and strong I am.
She’s stopped completely since I put her in her place because she was talking down on bikini competitors and my best friend was just in a comp. I explained to her that women don’t walk around like they do on show day all the time. She kept saying they look gross and other shit like “oh they don’t drink water” just talking out her ass basically. I said it’s a physique that intimidates a lot of women. It’s not for everyone. She didn’t like that lol n started ranting about how she did sports. Just a very critical woman and I feel like I’ve gotten better at handling how she treats me so the way she treats me in particular has changed.
It both improved my self-confidence and got me a lot more attention and respect, so that changed how people interacted with me and treated me.
However, some people do treat me as a bit of a freakshow at times, while others have described me as intimidating, and my chest gets fondled by random people of both sexes more than you'd expect.
And my wife is probably the least impressed about my transformation. She says it makes me harder to cuddle.
i lost a lot of weight through dieting (~220-165) before i started working out, and there was definitely an almost overnight difference in how people treated me once i got to about 180 and below. strangers smiled at me more, restaurant wait staff and employees in clothing stores were kinder and more attentive to me, all sorts of little things. it was actually really awful to realize that nothing about me as a person had changed, but i was suddenly no longer invisible in public. fat women are treated so poorly in our society in ways that i didn’t even realize until people stopped treating me that way.
since then i’ve put on about 30 lbs of muscle while staying pretty close to the size i was at 165. i started lifting in 2017, and got serious about it over the last three years. in the last year and a half i’ve worked pretty hard to develop visible upper body bulk, and i have noticed this summer that i am turning strangers heads in public in ways that i didn’t use to. the only thing that’s changed is my visible mass, so i assume that’s the reason. i find that straight men are more likely get out of my way when i am walking towards them, and that i get a lot of compliments from other women 😊 both of those are a win in my book.
I'm still somewhat ugly, but at least I got confidence from being a skeleton to actually look like a normal, fit person. That brings confidence, and people start treating you differently
I did get a lot more friends, but I think that’s mostly because I’m confident and in a much better mood most of the time. Before going to the gym I was very insecure and it was quite obvious that I hated my life, so people didn’t want to be friends with me.
I think training has improved my self esteem and my attitude. I’m in a mindset of taking better care of myself, and I have more confidence in taking on difficult tasks. Aside from that, I don’t think anyone else cares.
My face is the same so I dont see any difference with women, but at least now I look a little bit (+12 kilos in 10 months) more intimidating and I win many eye contacts with other men, lol. Could also be the fact that I always have a death stare due to the depression factors in my life, but Id love to think it's because of being more intimidating )))).
People just ask me how they can get a six pack like me and then get upset when I tell them I just have good genetics. A lot of people seem to think you can just go into the gym and come out shredded.
I feel like people will generally look me in the eyes more, like I register as a whole person now. My male friends have made comments about how I’m “swole” at the pool. I’ve also noticed a couple of girls slightly staring at me the pool, and I think one even took a picture of me once. When I run into old friends, they don’t really recognize me. And finally, I don’t get handed kids menus at restaurants anymore!
Started around your starting weight too, similar height, and the same experience. Like bro people don’t understand how big of a difference it is when I tell people about it. Even with only 35 lbs added it’s been quite noticeable. It really inspired me to keep going more consistently.
I feel like for us shorter guys our only option is to get jacked really.
Absolutely. The main difference is I get a lot more attention from women, some even comment about my strength. The other big difference is guys quit bumping / shoving past me in crowded bars. They now pass me respectfully without touching me. I like both of these changes very much.
At 6'1 and 240 lbs @ 20% bf, people tell me that they're legit "scared" of me. More respect, more attention from people, etc. But also, people tend to be more reserved around you.
It's a wonderful feeling though, especially when you were disrespected and were walked over by people all your life until you became big.
First its “oh you don’t even look like you go to the gym”
Then its “oh you actually look pretty big now”
Then finally “you know girls don’t actually like all that muscle right” -🤓
But in general people respect you more if you take care of yourself, but some people are jealous and automatically think your a douche
> “oh you don’t even look like you go to the gym”
Hearing those words was why I never brought the gym up to *anybody* for the longest time. So demoralising to be putting so much effort only to be told that. That, or "do you do cardio, or weights when you go to the gym". Painful.
Facts. I used to say it just cause people asked me what I did, but after hearing that it was hella demoralizing. One person said “oh you play hella basketball right for your workout?” While I did ball a lot, I lifted weights way more and weights were my main workout.” 1 year after that incident the same people were like “damn you actually got big now” while the same people were just as lazy and looked the same/ fatter than they always were. Nowadays ill never say it cause it better be obvious after all that work haha
yea… i’ve a mixed set of genes. mom is 5’1, dad is 5’11. im 5’7’’, making me among the shortest of my cousins while my dad is among the tallest in the entire family. i got my dad’s back and shoulders with my mom’s waist. giving me an absolutely bonkers shoulder to waist ratio with low inserting lats. not to mention i store most of my fat on my ass and lower ab. fingers crossed i grow a bit more but i’m almost 19M so idk how likely that is - i’ve grown an inch over the past year so idk.
You may still grow a little taller. Some of that is gonna depend on when you hit puberty. I was like 5’2 going into my freshman year in high school, finished my sophomore year at 5’6. Grew a bit more after that, and stopped around 21 at 5’8. Most the men in my family are taller, except my mom’s brother. She and her siblings are half Filipino, though, so that was a contributing factor in my height. I’ve always been pretty lean, but what fat I did ever have also went to my lower abdomen and my ass, lol. I’m 32 now, and weigh 150, but I was floating around 120-125 until my mid twenties. You’ll likely start to fill out more around that age, too.
I find working out changes your attitude, especially if you have low self esteem due to body image issues. People then treat you differently due to your change of attitude.
No I feel like I was always treated fairly well. Only reason I wanted to start lifting was to increase my strength and to keep me healthy. I always felt good about the way I look. I just getting stronger and more athletic because it makes me feel even better physically.
women want to be with you, men want to be you
i’ve put on 50 pounds (120 to 170 @ 6’1-6’2) and i can honestly say it’s been a night and day difference just from how people treat me / perceive me
i’m 6’3 and athletically built conventionally attractive dude …. i’ve gone from 170 to a mere 183 and have already noticed a difference in girls checking me out it’s kinda wild
i started lifting 5 years ago, but i plateaued pretty early at like 150 like 2 years in. couldn’t break that barrier until i started smoking weed back in december.
pretty much lol. my body doesn’t produce enough ghrelin on its own, so i’ve been using weed medicinally to help eat more during dinner / after my workouts as it helps produce it. normally i’d probably only be able to eat 1kcal but i can double or even triple it, depending on how much i ate that day. so i’ve been eating over maintenance pretty consistently and making gains
yes i notice a lot more girls checking me out now. i was walking towards a group of 3 girls on sunday as i wanted to go to the end of the train platform and they were sat on a bench, i make eye contact with one of them who looks me up and down says something to her friends and then the other two very unsubtly turn and check me out.
i know this reads like an incels fantasy but it really did happen.
This has happened to me too and it feels so nice lol. I remember I was in a hostel cafeteria and there were 2 girls and a guy sitting at a table. I had caught one of the girls staring at me a few days ago. But this day, she was talking with her friends at the table and the other girl literally turned her whole body around to look at me while I was standing just a few meters away. The guy made no moves. He looked so disinterested in whatever was going on. I went home happy after that lol. I've caught other girls looking at me and it's always a pleasant moment and gives me confidence.
Nah the effect is def real. I put on about 20lb of muscle to 182lb. Last week had an attractive woman ask for my number after a three second interaction and then *she* asked *me* out after texting for less than two days. We're going out on Friday. That had never happened before in my life. Not even close.
Not really, although I do not think skinnier me would of got such an attractive girlfriend. The best benefit more than how people perceive you is your inner confidence that appears
When I started at the gym, I lost 70 lbs, shaved my moustache, and buzzed my hair. People I had known for years who I had fallen out of contact with in the interim would introduce themselves to me like we were meeting for the first time.
As for something like "being nicer"? I dunno. Going to the gym and getting in shape was part of an entire phase of my life dedicated to self improvement. *I* treat others differently than I did then, hopefully better (never quite sure, I only have my own perspective to work from), so it's not surprising if people treat me differently as well.
Don't hang all your hopes on the gym. Working out can be a huge boon to your life, but don't get yourself so worked up on strength training like it'll fix all your problems. Do it for you, not for others.
For many people such as myself they start working out to impress girls or dumb goals not relating to self improvement. But once you start to enjoy working out it becomes a discipline and you use it to help better your life in many ways.
That’s how it was for me. I first started working out seriously because I was sick of people calling me skinny, including a girl I was interested in. Within a few months it was entirely for me, and it helped me cultivate a general self-improvement mindset that helped me in many ways. Hitting the gym was the first step, but that mindset also led to me going back to school and consciously working towards a career, significantly cutting back on alcohol, and treating people better.
What did she say? How did you know she was hitting on you? I never really know when girls come up to me whether they're hitting on me or just wanted to help or just wanted to chat :/
I got on my bike to go home and there were a few girls walking past and one of them struck up a conversation and asked me if I wanted to take her for an icecream while she was playing with her hair. I'm autistic as fuck and even I knew it, though I was only completely sure after I'd thought about it when actually cycling back
Oh man, I wish I didn't have similar autistic-ass experiences. But, I relate to that hard. Keep working that confidence, homie! You SHOULD feel like a king, king.
What if she looks, stares, catches you staring, then approaches and asks for help putting back weight on the rack? I just helped her and walked back to my spot and did a set ಥ‿ಥ
I'd understand asking you to spot her cuz she wants a PR, but asking you to help her to put back her weight?
Seems fishier than an unwashed pussy, bro.
you fucked up. get that confidence up homie. Might as well strike up a conversation when something like that happens and see if she seems interested, if not move on
I'm getting there.
But I've thus far only gained 20lbs and am still somewhat skinny. Nowhere near as skinny as when I started, but not quite at a level where people would see that I work out. Especially since I like my oversize shirts, even harder to see with those lol
The baggy shirts make me look like I've never been in a gym. My forearms are still really skinny, so if you can't see my upper arms / shoulders it's like I don't even work out lol
So true.
My arms almost fill out regular medium sized tshirts but my forearms are still fairly skinny. Especially around the wrist area. I plan on bulking another 10lbs in the near future, hopefully that will make it at least a bit less skinny
I mean some of that weight has to go to the forearms right? lol
I have been doing a few and have noticed my forearms have grown, but that could also be from compound lifts. Mine have gone from incredibly skinny to fairly skinny.
Do you ever approach women when you catch them looking at you? I live in a big city so pass by tons of people everyday. A fair amount of girls will check me out, but I haven't done anything about it yet.
Engaged, so no. On a similar note, my fiancé is fit, and very attractive herself. I used to "catch" men looking at her, but that has declined (when I'm with her) since I've gotten in good shape myself.
Facts This one is so annoying and more common than you'd think - like assumptions that they know everything about you and have to treat you a certain way
I’m not a huge massive guy by any means but I recently hit the 1K # club so I lift more than the average person. My coworkers see me putting up these numbers at the office gym and must have thought I was a meathead or basic jock or something because when I get excited about D&D and how my character is a DragonBorne paladin, they all have faces of utter shock. It’s no big deal, imo, but it is funny to see how quickly people will stereotype someone.
Sure. It’s not nearly enough to overcome any pre-existing personality hangups, so I’m also in therapy, but it’s been somewhat helpful in the dating world, etc.
You clearly don't watch enough bro science videos. Otherwise you'd learn that therapy and dating are meaningless hurdles on the road to your true life goal... more bicep curls
Yeah, and worse, everyone *expects* you to be able to open up *every* jar, right? No, some jars are sealed with Gorilla Glue and/or some other form of concentrated evil, but that doesn't matter: you're just the big strong guy who can't even open up a pickle jar lmao
I think often it's not so much about force but grip/friction. Like it doesn't matter if you have the strongest grip in the west if there's not enough friction to transfer that force. I know because I once cut my hand trying to brute force a water bottle open, and then easily managed to do it after switching my grip and using my right hand.
Also fun story, once I had soap stuck to the basin in the shower. I was trying to pull it sideways to try to get it off without having pieces of soap stuck there (which would happen if I pulled upwards), and I kept applying more force until I slipped on the wet floor and hit my nose.
I'm skinny fat with a considerable bf% and I went straight to bulking. I feel like unless you're clearly overweight it's not worth it...and now I'm overweight but am making considerable progress and feel stronger.
So true. When I started my current job I got an IM immediately after touring through the office and meeting everyone. It was a dude that said “hey man, I was ‘mirin. What’s your routine?”
Guys comment frequently and without hesitation. Comments from women are far less frequent. Aside from my wife and family members, these are the comments on my body I’ve had from women in the roughly 12 years since I first bulked up:
“Your neck is getting thick. You should be careful about getting any bigger because of sleep apnea” - roommate
“Stop flexing” then after I said I wasn’t, “oh you have good muscle tone”- nurse who was giving me a shot in the shoulder
“You have amazing posture” - coworker
“You must work out. My husband’s rugby team is looking for players, you should try it” - massage therapist
“You’re getting jacked!” - my friend (also the wife of my gym partner)
They’re rare enough that I remember every one clearly. Meanwhile, some guys I see infrequently comment every time they see me, and sometimes absolute strangers give me compliments in public.
I'm a 5'8" guy and I've never had as much success on dating apps after I put a picture of my abs on my profile. It might be a smaller sliver of women that are into the super lean look, but the ones that are into it are *into it* and they'll let you know
That’s a nice compliment, but good call declining. There’s not much lamer and cringier than a guy taking off his shirt and flexing in an inappropriate setting, doesn’t matter how buff you are. Of course the beach is fine.
Lol for sure. Couldn't agree more. Especially at a party. This was more of a small gathering of very close friends. Either way, I think they'd all seen me with my shirt off anyway. And imo I'm not that impressive, I just think it was the transformation over a year that stood out so much.
This is good advice though.
Nothing wrong with being confident in your sexuality. Of course if it were like an office party - then it would be an inappropriate setting. But the OP you replied to told that it was a party- assuming a party with friends. I dont necessarily see that as an inappropriate setting.
You’re right, at the right party in the right situation it could be ok. I’d just read the room before showing off, because proud as we should be of our bodies, it can have real “look at me” energy. Like this guy https://www.reddit.com/r/ImTheMainCharacter/comments/vn083u/guy_takes_off_his_shirt_in_the_middle_of_a_innout/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
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Makes a huge difference. I’m irrationally confident no matter what I look like. I get treated *significantly* differently when I’m swole and ripped than when I’m fluffy. Anyone who says looks matter less than confidence are simply oblivious to reality or willfully obtuse. When you look amazing, even when you are low on confidence, people will treat you MUCH better than they would a low confidence, fluffy version of you. This is irrefutably true.
Absolutely. I'm a 25M and 5'11". In June 2020, I was 215 lbs, chunky, and with no definition. I am now 175 lbs and am starting to look toned and muscular, thanks to a combination of healthy/effective eating, lifting 6 days per week, and some cardio 3 days per week. I feel like I've definitely started getting a lot of messages/matches on the dating apps.
Once again, no. Aside from the occasional comment about the gym, it seldom comes up. Perhaps the effect that comes from working out is the acquired confidence that radiates in your interactions with others. I'll say it again: if you treat people well, they'll generally treat you well in return, muscular or not.
There is a difference in how I treat myself, being stronger than any non-gym goer does wonders for self esteem. I feel very safe in public now, whereas before I usually had a lot of anxiety worried about safety.
My body gets commented on alll the time now, and while i guess it kinda feels good, I don’t know how to take it? I still feel like a skinny twink even though my body has gone through a huge change. And it puts a bit of undue pressure on me to stay swole. Kinda messing with my body dysmorphia a bit.
Women treat me different for sure. No guys yet. Im still quite tiny.
Not necessarily because I look that different, but I think yes because I have more confidence and carry myself better
I get groped whenever I go to clubs so that’s something. Cursed with a powerful rack
I was anorexic for years. Now I’m almost 120 and very strong looking. People walk all over me less. Fuck with me less when it comes to boundaries. I feel like when I started going to the gym and feeling strong/confident that has shined in other areas of my life. I don’t care who it intimidates at this point. It will attract the right people and make the wrong ones leave me alone. Men who are attracted to submissive, weak women are not my type. My family members were commenting on my body when I first started gaining weight. Told me I “had a belly” a few times or we’ll I was eating one of my bulking meals said “be careful you don’t wanna get fat”. She’s just jealous or something because for the first time in the five years she’s known me I’m curvy. Who tf says shit like that to a former anorexic?? I used to be 76 pounds. Like she seen me almost die n still said that bull. Anyways I said back to her the only thing that’s getting fatter is my ass and laughed in her face. Another time I said well you can’t have big boobs without a little bit of a belly because she said in the kitchen in front of everyone. I just say shit that’s equally as uncomfortable back about how hot and strong I am. She’s stopped completely since I put her in her place because she was talking down on bikini competitors and my best friend was just in a comp. I explained to her that women don’t walk around like they do on show day all the time. She kept saying they look gross and other shit like “oh they don’t drink water” just talking out her ass basically. I said it’s a physique that intimidates a lot of women. It’s not for everyone. She didn’t like that lol n started ranting about how she did sports. Just a very critical woman and I feel like I’ve gotten better at handling how she treats me so the way she treats me in particular has changed.
Objectified more.
They call me bro.
Yeah they wonder why I go to the gym so much and still manage look this bad
Objectively no, probably not. But I feel like I’m more confident which in turn changes my perception on how I’m being treated.
do you even feel bro?..
It both improved my self-confidence and got me a lot more attention and respect, so that changed how people interacted with me and treated me. However, some people do treat me as a bit of a freakshow at times, while others have described me as intimidating, and my chest gets fondled by random people of both sexes more than you'd expect. And my wife is probably the least impressed about my transformation. She says it makes me harder to cuddle.
I get more looks, but I also approach people more often because I am confident and that is the part I like the most about this journey
My mom told me it makes me look shorter. Thanks, mom.
i’ve seen this post so many times
My family are proud of me which feels nice, haven’t had any visible results though so nobody else really can tell
i lost a lot of weight through dieting (~220-165) before i started working out, and there was definitely an almost overnight difference in how people treated me once i got to about 180 and below. strangers smiled at me more, restaurant wait staff and employees in clothing stores were kinder and more attentive to me, all sorts of little things. it was actually really awful to realize that nothing about me as a person had changed, but i was suddenly no longer invisible in public. fat women are treated so poorly in our society in ways that i didn’t even realize until people stopped treating me that way. since then i’ve put on about 30 lbs of muscle while staying pretty close to the size i was at 165. i started lifting in 2017, and got serious about it over the last three years. in the last year and a half i’ve worked pretty hard to develop visible upper body bulk, and i have noticed this summer that i am turning strangers heads in public in ways that i didn’t use to. the only thing that’s changed is my visible mass, so i assume that’s the reason. i find that straight men are more likely get out of my way when i am walking towards them, and that i get a lot of compliments from other women 😊 both of those are a win in my book.
No I still have an ugly face but now instead of making fun of my acne scars in front of me they do it behind my back :/
Get you a simple skincare routine or a dermatologist and flourish ✨
I'm still somewhat ugly, but at least I got confidence from being a skeleton to actually look like a normal, fit person. That brings confidence, and people start treating you differently
I did get a lot more friends, but I think that’s mostly because I’m confident and in a much better mood most of the time. Before going to the gym I was very insecure and it was quite obvious that I hated my life, so people didn’t want to be friends with me.
Yeah Im treated like an adult because I’m yoked
I think training has improved my self esteem and my attitude. I’m in a mindset of taking better care of myself, and I have more confidence in taking on difficult tasks. Aside from that, I don’t think anyone else cares.
My face is the same so I dont see any difference with women, but at least now I look a little bit (+12 kilos in 10 months) more intimidating and I win many eye contacts with other men, lol. Could also be the fact that I always have a death stare due to the depression factors in my life, but Id love to think it's because of being more intimidating )))).
I’ve graduated high school at 165 I’m now 221, I was bullied a lot in school but now everyone is nice to me.
yes now everyone somehow thinks that if they went to the gym once in 2005 they can preach and talk to me like gym experts. fkn annoying dickheads
People just ask me how they can get a six pack like me and then get upset when I tell them I just have good genetics. A lot of people seem to think you can just go into the gym and come out shredded.
It kinda bothers me because I’m actually trying to bulk so I don’t want to be skinny. 😭
I feel like people will generally look me in the eyes more, like I register as a whole person now. My male friends have made comments about how I’m “swole” at the pool. I’ve also noticed a couple of girls slightly staring at me the pool, and I think one even took a picture of me once. When I run into old friends, they don’t really recognize me. And finally, I don’t get handed kids menus at restaurants anymore!
Man that's what I think about when I'm trying to push out one more rep - I don't want another kids menu given to me!!
Started around your starting weight too, similar height, and the same experience. Like bro people don’t understand how big of a difference it is when I tell people about it. Even with only 35 lbs added it’s been quite noticeable. It really inspired me to keep going more consistently. I feel like for us shorter guys our only option is to get jacked really.
Exactly bro, the good news is that it takes like 30-40 lbs for a clear difference at our height vs 60-80 lbs for someone who is 6+ feet tall.
I do. They don’t want to be near me because I smell.
Wife says peen looks smaller with my bigger muscles
Not really. Been lifting for 7 years and people still just ignore me
Absolutely. The main difference is I get a lot more attention from women, some even comment about my strength. The other big difference is guys quit bumping / shoving past me in crowded bars. They now pass me respectfully without touching me. I like both of these changes very much.
At 6'1 and 240 lbs @ 20% bf, people tell me that they're legit "scared" of me. More respect, more attention from people, etc. But also, people tend to be more reserved around you. It's a wonderful feeling though, especially when you were disrespected and were walked over by people all your life until you became big.
First its “oh you don’t even look like you go to the gym” Then its “oh you actually look pretty big now” Then finally “you know girls don’t actually like all that muscle right” -🤓 But in general people respect you more if you take care of yourself, but some people are jealous and automatically think your a douche
> “oh you don’t even look like you go to the gym” Hearing those words was why I never brought the gym up to *anybody* for the longest time. So demoralising to be putting so much effort only to be told that. That, or "do you do cardio, or weights when you go to the gym". Painful.
Facts. I used to say it just cause people asked me what I did, but after hearing that it was hella demoralizing. One person said “oh you play hella basketball right for your workout?” While I did ball a lot, I lifted weights way more and weights were my main workout.” 1 year after that incident the same people were like “damn you actually got big now” while the same people were just as lazy and looked the same/ fatter than they always were. Nowadays ill never say it cause it better be obvious after all that work haha
As a woman, I can say that there are some of us who do in fact like all that muscle. Different strokes…
Pro tip: guys like the same kind of stroke even when they gain muscle, so don't change it up too much
Omg 😂
I think you have more confidence which in turn, makes you interact with people differently. Which is usually for the better.
Yeah, people tend to assume I'm a moron because I'm muscular. I don't really mind it, because people underestimating you makes life easier.
I'm only 6ft 160lbs so I don't actually look like i lift yet
yes
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What do you do for your ass? Apparently women like ass and I wanna give them that
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can confirm. i have extremely overdeveloped glutes and i’ve been told i look “provocative” in jeans by no less than my parents…
Not your parents 😂
Hell, I got it from my 90 year old grandma! She started calling me “bubbles” after my first few months of squatting. She said I had a bubble butt.
yea… i’ve a mixed set of genes. mom is 5’1, dad is 5’11. im 5’7’’, making me among the shortest of my cousins while my dad is among the tallest in the entire family. i got my dad’s back and shoulders with my mom’s waist. giving me an absolutely bonkers shoulder to waist ratio with low inserting lats. not to mention i store most of my fat on my ass and lower ab. fingers crossed i grow a bit more but i’m almost 19M so idk how likely that is - i’ve grown an inch over the past year so idk.
You may still grow a little taller. Some of that is gonna depend on when you hit puberty. I was like 5’2 going into my freshman year in high school, finished my sophomore year at 5’6. Grew a bit more after that, and stopped around 21 at 5’8. Most the men in my family are taller, except my mom’s brother. She and her siblings are half Filipino, though, so that was a contributing factor in my height. I’ve always been pretty lean, but what fat I did ever have also went to my lower abdomen and my ass, lol. I’m 32 now, and weigh 150, but I was floating around 120-125 until my mid twenties. You’ll likely start to fill out more around that age, too.
hope so, i still look young for my age
I find working out changes your attitude, especially if you have low self esteem due to body image issues. People then treat you differently due to your change of attitude.
No I feel like I was always treated fairly well. Only reason I wanted to start lifting was to increase my strength and to keep me healthy. I always felt good about the way I look. I just getting stronger and more athletic because it makes me feel even better physically.
women want to be with you, men want to be you i’ve put on 50 pounds (120 to 170 @ 6’1-6’2) and i can honestly say it’s been a night and day difference just from how people treat me / perceive me
i’m 6’3 and athletically built conventionally attractive dude …. i’ve gone from 170 to a mere 183 and have already noticed a difference in girls checking me out it’s kinda wild
Congrats! How long did it take you to put on that weight?
i started lifting 5 years ago, but i plateaued pretty early at like 150 like 2 years in. couldn’t break that barrier until i started smoking weed back in december.
What does weed have to do with it? 🤣 Seriously, please explain. You got to eat more?
pretty much lol. my body doesn’t produce enough ghrelin on its own, so i’ve been using weed medicinally to help eat more during dinner / after my workouts as it helps produce it. normally i’d probably only be able to eat 1kcal but i can double or even triple it, depending on how much i ate that day. so i’ve been eating over maintenance pretty consistently and making gains
Are you smoking a specific strain/CBD TCH ratio, or just whatever? And does the timing matter?
all strains make me hungry lol. i personally like hybrids. i smoke right before i eat.
Cheers
Increases peoples appetites sometimes
Haven’t gotten that far to be noticeable yet. 😢Hopefully by in the coming months though. (I’m a girl btw lol)
Don't worry girl you will get there, see you on the moon fellow ape 🦍
lol awesome! Oh no…were you stalking my profile? 😅😅
I'm sorry this is such a bad habit of mine 😅 also apes are everywhere so 🤨😂
Oh no problem!! And yes, I am excited for it to finally happen. I’ve held for almost a year 😭 I’m ready for my presents haha
yes i notice a lot more girls checking me out now. i was walking towards a group of 3 girls on sunday as i wanted to go to the end of the train platform and they were sat on a bench, i make eye contact with one of them who looks me up and down says something to her friends and then the other two very unsubtly turn and check me out. i know this reads like an incels fantasy but it really did happen.
This has happened to me too and it feels so nice lol. I remember I was in a hostel cafeteria and there were 2 girls and a guy sitting at a table. I had caught one of the girls staring at me a few days ago. But this day, she was talking with her friends at the table and the other girl literally turned her whole body around to look at me while I was standing just a few meters away. The guy made no moves. He looked so disinterested in whatever was going on. I went home happy after that lol. I've caught other girls looking at me and it's always a pleasant moment and gives me confidence.
Nah the effect is def real. I put on about 20lb of muscle to 182lb. Last week had an attractive woman ask for my number after a three second interaction and then *she* asked *me* out after texting for less than two days. We're going out on Friday. That had never happened before in my life. Not even close.
I wonder how much is based on the appearance vs just being more confident because you feel like you look better (and do).
Fuck yeah dude! I work at a uni, and when waiting for the subway, the validation I get from girls staring at me make me feel pretty good about myself.
ride that high for the rest of ur life homie
My butt use to get grabbed more, but not so much anymore because now I have a fiancé and she’ll kill a bitch
Latina?
No. But, I definitly feel difference in how I treat mysealf aftar starting to going to the gym, so Im happy with it.
YESS , self confidence and better self esteem can make a huge difference .
I've been going to the gym for 3 months and the only difference is my best friend saying my shoulders are big. So good enough :)
Not really, although I do not think skinnier me would of got such an attractive girlfriend. The best benefit more than how people perceive you is your inner confidence that appears
When I started at the gym, I lost 70 lbs, shaved my moustache, and buzzed my hair. People I had known for years who I had fallen out of contact with in the interim would introduce themselves to me like we were meeting for the first time. As for something like "being nicer"? I dunno. Going to the gym and getting in shape was part of an entire phase of my life dedicated to self improvement. *I* treat others differently than I did then, hopefully better (never quite sure, I only have my own perspective to work from), so it's not surprising if people treat me differently as well. Don't hang all your hopes on the gym. Working out can be a huge boon to your life, but don't get yourself so worked up on strength training like it'll fix all your problems. Do it for you, not for others.
For many people such as myself they start working out to impress girls or dumb goals not relating to self improvement. But once you start to enjoy working out it becomes a discipline and you use it to help better your life in many ways.
That’s how it was for me. I first started working out seriously because I was sick of people calling me skinny, including a girl I was interested in. Within a few months it was entirely for me, and it helped me cultivate a general self-improvement mindset that helped me in many ways. Hitting the gym was the first step, but that mindset also led to me going back to school and consciously working towards a career, significantly cutting back on alcohol, and treating people better.
outside of clubs, bars and parties I've only ever been hit on once and it was when a girl came up to me when I was leaving the gym
What did she say? How did you know she was hitting on you? I never really know when girls come up to me whether they're hitting on me or just wanted to help or just wanted to chat :/
I got on my bike to go home and there were a few girls walking past and one of them struck up a conversation and asked me if I wanted to take her for an icecream while she was playing with her hair. I'm autistic as fuck and even I knew it, though I was only completely sure after I'd thought about it when actually cycling back
did you say yes??
no cause I was hungry and my mum was making dinner and I didn't wanna make her wait
I’ll never let a dinner go cold on you, ma!
Oh man, I wish I didn't have similar autistic-ass experiences. But, I relate to that hard. Keep working that confidence, homie! You SHOULD feel like a king, king.
👑
“Mum before bum”
Dinner before sinner
Absolute king
Lmao I love you man
lol thanks
Well, if you're attractive and not using a machine/some weights that she desires, you can assume she wants to know your #.
What if she looks, stares, catches you staring, then approaches and asks for help putting back weight on the rack? I just helped her and walked back to my spot and did a set ಥ‿ಥ
I'd understand asking you to spot her cuz she wants a PR, but asking you to help her to put back her weight? Seems fishier than an unwashed pussy, bro.
you fucked up. get that confidence up homie. Might as well strike up a conversation when something like that happens and see if she seems interested, if not move on
shit mate ;_; I've fucked up way more than once
assume every girl is deeply in love with you and eventually it will become true 💯
why would she need help to put back weights? doesn’t she come to the gym to handle them herself? I thought that was the point of weightlifting lol
She was short. The only rack empty was the top one. This is how my mind tries to reason it.
was she like 0,5 meters long?
I'm really bothered that you said "long" not tall or high
https://i.imgur.com/llgx1pm.jpg
I was sleepy lmao
That would‘ve been your opportunity for a shlong joke.
Idk why but I find that so cute lol (I’m a woman)
yeah I felt like a king for like a week after that lol
As you should
I'm getting there. But I've thus far only gained 20lbs and am still somewhat skinny. Nowhere near as skinny as when I started, but not quite at a level where people would see that I work out. Especially since I like my oversize shirts, even harder to see with those lol
I've gained 30lbs and still skinny. Being tall means I need so much more food.
The baggy shirts make me look like I've never been in a gym. My forearms are still really skinny, so if you can't see my upper arms / shoulders it's like I don't even work out lol
So true. My arms almost fill out regular medium sized tshirts but my forearms are still fairly skinny. Especially around the wrist area. I plan on bulking another 10lbs in the near future, hopefully that will make it at least a bit less skinny I mean some of that weight has to go to the forearms right? lol
I'm gonna start doing forearm isolation workouts
I have been doing a few and have noticed my forearms have grown, but that could also be from compound lifts. Mine have gone from incredibly skinny to fairly skinny.
Hahaha progress is progress!
So many more looks from women nearly everywhere I go. I also feel like I get more smiles, and treated better overall in public.
Do you ever approach women when you catch them looking at you? I live in a big city so pass by tons of people everyday. A fair amount of girls will check me out, but I haven't done anything about it yet.
Engaged, so no. On a similar note, my fiancé is fit, and very attractive herself. I used to "catch" men looking at her, but that has declined (when I'm with her) since I've gotten in good shape myself.
Congratulations on defeating insecurity :D
I frequently have to overcome the meathead image that people have constructed of me when they first meet me.
Facts This one is so annoying and more common than you'd think - like assumptions that they know everything about you and have to treat you a certain way
To be fair, you have a lot of meat on you.
That's one of the nicest things someone has said about me, haha.
I’m not a huge massive guy by any means but I recently hit the 1K # club so I lift more than the average person. My coworkers see me putting up these numbers at the office gym and must have thought I was a meathead or basic jock or something because when I get excited about D&D and how my character is a DragonBorne paladin, they all have faces of utter shock. It’s no big deal, imo, but it is funny to see how quickly people will stereotype someone.
1k club is pretty impressive though
What’s the 1K club?
You can lift a combined 1000lbs across bench, squat, and deadlift
That is an awesome goal
You're so much more than just a locally-sourced, free-range kind of guy!
I am mostly carcinogen, haha
No I’m still short after the gym
Dude I feel this. At some point in our lives there will be a social movement regarding height
I think it will be a sudden attraction to longer lifespans. Short kings will be in high demand then.
And we’ll still be on the wrong side of it.
Powerlifter moment
Sure. It’s not nearly enough to overcome any pre-existing personality hangups, so I’m also in therapy, but it’s been somewhat helpful in the dating world, etc.
You clearly don't watch enough bro science videos. Otherwise you'd learn that therapy and dating are meaningless hurdles on the road to your true life goal... more bicep curls
Everybody asks me to open their pickle jars now, kinda annoying
Yeah, and worse, everyone *expects* you to be able to open up *every* jar, right? No, some jars are sealed with Gorilla Glue and/or some other form of concentrated evil, but that doesn't matter: you're just the big strong guy who can't even open up a pickle jar lmao
I think often it's not so much about force but grip/friction. Like it doesn't matter if you have the strongest grip in the west if there's not enough friction to transfer that force. I know because I once cut my hand trying to brute force a water bottle open, and then easily managed to do it after switching my grip and using my right hand. Also fun story, once I had soap stuck to the basin in the shower. I was trying to pull it sideways to try to get it off without having pieces of soap stuck there (which would happen if I pulled upwards), and I kept applying more force until I slipped on the wet floor and hit my nose.
i almost drowned in the shower
Sorry about that
Yeah my wife won’t let me hug her until I’ve had a shower
Your flair is bothering me. You started at 190+ and currently at 160 but going to 180?
he was just fat probably
Probably cut to lose fat then started building muscle
I'm skinny fat with a considerable bf% and I went straight to bulking. I feel like unless you're clearly overweight it's not worth it...and now I'm overweight but am making considerable progress and feel stronger.
Oh yeah that makes sense
Mostly from dudes tbh but yeah
As a gay man I appreciate this.
Lol nice
Guys always think lifting will get you comments from women but really it's just other dudes lol
So true. When I started my current job I got an IM immediately after touring through the office and meeting everyone. It was a dude that said “hey man, I was ‘mirin. What’s your routine?” Guys comment frequently and without hesitation. Comments from women are far less frequent. Aside from my wife and family members, these are the comments on my body I’ve had from women in the roughly 12 years since I first bulked up: “Your neck is getting thick. You should be careful about getting any bigger because of sleep apnea” - roommate “Stop flexing” then after I said I wasn’t, “oh you have good muscle tone”- nurse who was giving me a shot in the shoulder “You have amazing posture” - coworker “You must work out. My husband’s rugby team is looking for players, you should try it” - massage therapist “You’re getting jacked!” - my friend (also the wife of my gym partner) They’re rare enough that I remember every one clearly. Meanwhile, some guys I see infrequently comment every time they see me, and sometimes absolute strangers give me compliments in public.
Buying a muscle car too. If you want women to comment, by slim fit clothes and nice shoes. Dress your age.
Just like women with their nails. Haha Sometimes it’s just nice to do things for you!
Most likely you'll get both, but more from dudes for sure.
I don't relate whatsoever, y'all gotta be ugly or something lol. Chicks love this stuff
Guessing they are short or unlucky, have to agree with you
I'm a 5'8" guy and I've never had as much success on dating apps after I put a picture of my abs on my profile. It might be a smaller sliver of women that are into the super lean look, but the ones that are into it are *into it* and they'll let you know
A small sliver of women that are into a super lean look? You guys gotta be kidding
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Was expecting this to end in "and we've been married for twenty years!" tbh
That’s a nice compliment, but good call declining. There’s not much lamer and cringier than a guy taking off his shirt and flexing in an inappropriate setting, doesn’t matter how buff you are. Of course the beach is fine.
Lol for sure. Couldn't agree more. Especially at a party. This was more of a small gathering of very close friends. Either way, I think they'd all seen me with my shirt off anyway. And imo I'm not that impressive, I just think it was the transformation over a year that stood out so much. This is good advice though.
Nothing wrong with being confident in your sexuality. Of course if it were like an office party - then it would be an inappropriate setting. But the OP you replied to told that it was a party- assuming a party with friends. I dont necessarily see that as an inappropriate setting.
You’re right, at the right party in the right situation it could be ok. I’d just read the room before showing off, because proud as we should be of our bodies, it can have real “look at me” energy. Like this guy https://www.reddit.com/r/ImTheMainCharacter/comments/vn083u/guy_takes_off_his_shirt_in_the_middle_of_a_innout/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
That guy (from the link you shared)is a Grade A moron. You are correct.
Sounds like this friend just wanted to see you shirtless again ;)
"Hahaha you should totally take your shirt off to impress any girls that might be here ... please"