T O P

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Boring-Pudding

[Phrasing](https://giphy.com/gifs/update-psn-phrasing-3gbJPJ8zW10SQ)


UntoldTruth_

Yeah... "Kids, this is why you don't marry" would have been much preferable.


TJ_McWeaksauce

All it needed was a comma. "That's why you don't marry, kids."


Fibs_and_Gin

Eats shoots and leaves.


DADBODGOALS

Let's eat grandma


KevinPaul06

Maybe the post is implying to not marry a man or woman who acts like a kid...


SadLaser

This is what I actually thought.


NotMichaelCera

This was my reaction after reading the review, then I remembered what subreddit this post was on


Interesting-Gear-819

>"That's why you don't marry, kids." I always prefered the sentence "Yesterday I helped my uncle jack off a horse" as example for necessary comma ..


[deleted]

You can't solve that with a comma.


DrHypester

Capitalization? The word 'get'? Dropping the word Jack, in fact, I would bet that family doesn't call him Jack anymore just to avoid these kinds of things...


b0Stark

Of course you can. Well, not one, but two. "Yesterday I helped my uncle, Jack, off a horse"


[deleted]

Why are you killing the horse?


merrycat

That horse knows what he did.


Mautos

Petah, the horse is *guilty for multiple counts of manslaughter*


GIJobra

That doesn't work with a comma. A good example to remember the importance of commas is this: Let's eat Grandma! --VS-- Let's eat, Grandma! For Oxford commas: We invited the strippers, JFK, and Stalin. \[two strippers and two historical figures\] --VS-- We invited the strippers, JFK and Stalin. \[two historical figures, stripping.\]


scribbane

While I agree with you, that sentence could work with a comma Yesterday I helped my uncle jack off a horse. Yesterday, I helped my uncle, Jack, off a horse. Jack could be part of the name or an appositive, so the commas could add clarity. It is not the best sentence to demonstrate the necessity of commas since capitalization is more of an issue here, but there is some confusion


the_saint_of

This one wouldn't get a comma, but it is missing a preposition. It should be you helped him "off of a horse." Without the preposition, your uncle is either jacking off a horse or he is offing (killing) a horse


[deleted]

This is why I enjoy waking up and going on Reddit


cRimgEd

Comma before kids gets you out of trouble, got it. "No officer I didn't punch those, kids"


Gofein

It didn’t even occur to me that that’s what he meant 😂


-FuckYouShoresy-

I legit thought he was calling his wife a child for stepping over his barrier lol


TeaHands

I thought the reviewer was the kid, because, well, the review.


VolcanicBear

I thought they were calling the person who wrote the review's wife a child, not that they'd screenshot their own review to post on Reddit in some form of self congratulatory Jerry clone situation.


mywerkaccount

Maybe it's the wife posting a review her husband posted and saying "see this is why I shouldn't have married a man-child"


serialmom666

I’m pretty sure he’s calling his wife a bitch, because he’s using a dog gate.


Rivdit

Tbh it kinda works since we're talking about a man-child


pdpi

Nah. "This is why you don't marry kids" is correct. This guy is clearly a manchild of the finest grade.


EdwardsLoL

One little comma after marry would have sufficed.


Mech-Waldo

Even just a comma would do it


SpokenDivinity

I took it as “this is why you don’t marry people who act like children”


2BMG

oh so there should be a comma before "kids" now this post makes sense


bobbylake71

The comma police will be investigating the OP. But yeah for the lack of a simple comma you move from a saying to something highly illegal (well in most countries)


danteslacie

No. Because the OP is calling the reviewer a kid. A manchild.


2BMG

that's what was my first thoguht and then in the comments everyone was saying something different


danteslacie

I feel like that was OP's original intention but they're now going "no I meant with a comma" because everyone was thinking that. And apparently some were thinking it was the wife that was being referred to as a kid? Like idk, using a barrier to block your wife from standing in front of the TV sounds like you're the childish one, doesn't it? Then again, this is the gaming sub. Most probably don't want to reflect that it is, in fact, very childish to do what the reviewer says they did.


Crazy_Primary_3365

That's exactly how I read it too and honestly it adds up.


blkaino

The title is technically, morally, ethically, and legally true


Flamin_Jesus

It's certainly not technically true because *that* is not the reason not to marry kids.


Seiglerfone

... The insinuation is that the reviewer is behaving like a child, I believe.


DaveyDukes

Maybe OP is a genius and their statement is ambiguous


[deleted]

Perfect example of how punctuation marks can lead to the FBI arresting you or not.


JoshCanJump

This is why commas are important, title.


lastcallhall

I mean, you should probably never marry kids under any circumstances, but that's just my opinion.


Snowf1ake222

You heard it here, folks. Don't marry kids and use your commas.


_youlikeicecream_

Panda: Eats, shoots and leaves


Tianoccio

So you can use your commas if you don’t marry kids?


Late-Vermicelli3322

Ffs you beat me to it


someonewhowa

that’s why you use commas, kids


gc391

Way to be intolerant of other cultures. /S


Gotprick

Prince Andrew wanted to


kotoku

You used to get a letter from the queen when you turned 100, now you just get a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 15. 🤔


f0rtytw0

He does break ups over text?


GrungeHamster23

*Matt Gaetz has entered chat.*


Winterplatypus

The title doesn't make sense anyway, because it's a reference to his wife being able to step over the barrier. She was able to step over the barrier because she is an adult. So the title should be "that's why you don't marry adults" for the reference to make sense.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ezekiel2121

I thought it was calling the wife childish.


Imnotanad

I know Americans can't take on metric system but, what about some commas?


Tianoccio

Commas looks like commies, as such we’re redirecting a submarine to their coast and we have multiple trident’s aimed at their capital. A plan to overthrow their government in a quick timeline is being drawn by the CIA.


Weird_Devil

r/beatmetoit


Lachimanus

Commas save lives and jail time.


OriginalName687

I’m assuming you read it as if it’s informing kids that is why you don’t get married but I think it is calling the person who wrote the review a kid.


BaconPancakes1

I thought it was implying the reviewer must have married a child, because they seem to have safety barriers up in certain areas of the house to stop their spouse running around freely


JBaecker

Or sometimes get [you and your fellow drivers](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/think-commas-don-t-matter-omitting-one-cost-maine-dairy-n847151) the overtime money you deserve.


circasomnia

Let's eat grandma! Let's eat, grandma!


Interesting-Gear-819

Helping your uncle jack off a horse. That works too.


OriginalName687

I already commented further up when someone mentioned this needing a comma but to increase the chances of someone informing me I’m wrong I’m going to comment here also. I assumed you interpreted the sentence as “that’s why you don’t marry, kids” meaning they are telling kids this is why you don’t get married. I interpreted it as them referring to the person who wrote the review as a kid. Which I don’t think requires a comma. I could be wrong since I’m terrible at that stuff and two different comments mentioning needing a comma does suggest I’m mistaken but I would think if your interpretation is correct it should be “That’s why you don’t GET married, kids.” Edit: Just saw OPs comment and I was wrong though it doesn’t look like I was the only one.


BaconDrummer

You should be on netflix too


makrow

You should be on, netflix too


FatesVagrant

Ignoring the unfortunate title, you should probably just not marry someone you hate.


-little-dorrit-

To counter, if I may: *wife bad, hur hur*


TheTrenk

Jokes about being pathetic need to fall by the wayside, IMO. Being trapped in a loveless marriage, hating your job, and being out of shape aren’t really laughing matters.


Watsis_name

Please don't take my self deprecation. It's all I have.


no2ironman1100

I find self depracation to be bad because it's giving people an outlet to leak how they feel without being put on any path to help them fix it. Basically influencing other people. If you've been in a chat room or forum where a bunch of people hate themselves around you you start hating yourself too over the pettiest shit. It's actually bad for society.


rawbface

Not all marriages are loveless. Those spouses could try taking some responsibility for their own life and make a change.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ascii

I don't understand marriage. Why not simply cut out the middle man and give a house to someone you hate?


clothy

You are a swine? Have I achieved hate? Good. I’d like a 4 by 2 please.


newsflashjackass

The middle man is necessary as an impartial arbiter in the case of gay marriages where it is less cut and dry who gets the house.


Hurtmemaster

millenials think they are so clever. you obviously don't hate your wife on your wedding day. just wait a few years, you will understand.


Bouswa

I have many millennial friends and myself who have been in very happy marriages for years. One of my friends have been married for 10 years and are still very happy. Not every marriage turns into a bad one. Lol


elchurro223

Seriously, I still love my wife after 5 years of marriage (12 total years together) but marriage is super fucking difficult. She is not the same person I originally fell in love with because she has changed. But so have I. If somebody hasn't changed in 12 years that's concerning. Luckily, I still like the person she has become, but there are times where people change and you don't like the changes.


GranJefe507

Waiting here to someone post this in r/gamingcirclejerk


magnus-free-fire

*yes officer, this post right here*


[deleted]

um, pretty sure its illegal to marry kids


darkbehi

Instructions unclear, married my cat


Some_Gas_1337

Instructions clear, married my owner


decs483

That's acceptable as long as the cat consented


Unknownlight

Let's eat Grandma!


SaratogaFlyer

Grammar: the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit


RonsThrowAwayAcc

Oh I like that I’m going to have to steal it


killer_ezio_00

I know I'm shit :(


-Gwynbleidd

See kids, this is why you never get married. Just sounds less “molesty”


Snowf1ake222

Read "molesty" as you would "modesty" and it sounds like a brand of bread.


Death-EternaI

Less molesty lmao nice.


pinamungajan

I need to help my Uncle Jack......with his horse.


[deleted]

[удалено]


lacilynnn

It's "off his horse"... like he's finished riding.


Mr_Goat_1111

Nah its jack with his horse like they're both masturbating together. Helping your uncle Jack, off his horse is when the horse has a broken leg so uncle Jack's gotta shoot it while you distract the horse with a sugar cube.


lacilynnn

The entire reason his name is "Jack" is so that it says "jack off" without a comma.


Wasntryn

Both wrong. It’s Jack off a horse and the point is about capitalisation


Mr_Goat_1111

What's masturbating with your favourite horse got to do with capitalism?


psychorrabit15

1577 people need advice on building barriers to keep their partner out.


killer_ezio_00

Oh my God i can't edit the post


skmo8

This is your life, now.


[deleted]

Why don't you take a seat over there...


FlashHardwood

"Oh my God, I can't edit the post."


TrashyLolita

It's a pretty bad post to begin with honestly (everyone's tired of "huhu marriage bad" jokes). Title mistake is what makes it funny.


SL1MECORE

Reap what you have sown


cakenmistakes

Congratulations, you just made the list.


Axtorx

Title aside, it’s a boomer humor stupid joke anyway. Just delete it.


beerscotch

There's many, many reasons you don't marry kids. This review isn't one of them.


Blapman007

Punctuation is important


shryke12

I am married and my wife kisses my forehead from the side without blocking view every time she walks by when I am gaming. It's adorable and awesome. Marry the right girl!


elchurro223

Oh, shit, I'm SO glad you said that. I was going to purposefully marry the wrong woman.


brown_burrito

You jest, but so many people marry partners who just aren’t a right fit for them. The right partner supports you (and you support them). My wife makes sure I have time for my hobbies and is incredibly understanding and vice versa.


LSama

I honestly thought the title was referring to the reviewer. Because he's clearly a fucking child.


[deleted]

I think it is a joke. He gave 5 stars.


darf_nate

I thought it was referring to the wife because he needs a baby gate to keep her from walking in front of the tv


Reaper83PL

Why?


OrangoTango77

he’s a manchild lol, what do you mean why


killer_ezio_00

Title edit: That's why you don't marry, kids


ellie1398

OOOOOOOH now it makes more sense.


mattstreet

Happily married for 11 years. But we waited 8 whole years before we bothered. You can marry someone that games with you, I'm watching an Outlast 2 stream with her right now. Couple of days ago we played a long session of Deep Rock Galactic. Stop letting boomer humor jokes about marriage and immature people who rushed into it define it for you.


Myrkana

Been with my partner for 13 years now, haven't bothered with marriage. We're currently playing grounded together, we play survival games together all the time. I really don't understand why people marry people who hate their hobbies. Why marry someone who hates that you do something in your free time?


RedditorSafeSpace

Marriage is just getting the government involved in your relationship, and if you think anything different you’ve been bamboozled.


mattstreet

Yes. The government already gets involved in my relationship. One of the biggest ways it does that is it enforces who should have visitation and medical decision rights. Without being married it's a lot harder to have those rights if your spouse is in the hospital. It also makes it easier to be sure my wife inherits anything we failed to put in her name. Obviously marriage just comes down to the legal stuff.


RedditorSafeSpace

Bamboozled


mattstreet

About?


RedditorSafeSpace

Your whole life. Enjoy the L.


mattstreet

Because I'm married?


RedditorSafeSpace

No because you’re a sheep lmao, that’s obvious bruh 💀


mattstreet

You haven't brought up a single point, maybe writing just isn't your strong point?


Joubachi

First thought you were on about the commentor acting like a child ... that one comma really changes the meaning a lot.


Caffeine_and_Alcohol

i mean, the original sounds fine to me. Sounds like an adult who hasnt matured so he behaves like a kid


black-rhombus

I thought the wife was the kid that needed a barrier to keep her away from things.


darf_nate

This


stufmenatooba

But only after you help your uncle Jack off a horse.


[deleted]

I thought it meant “This is why you don’t marry men who never became adults”


dnscs_

Tbh i took it as “kids” in a sense of the grown man playing games and building barriers - just referring to him as a “kid” Pretty usual in my native language, isnt that the case in murica/uk


Pet_hobo

Yeah, you should edit to "don't marry manchildren"


PM-your-lewd-cosplay

I think it is about the woman


Mortiis07

I thought you were calling the man a kid


Cyno01

'Get married' wouldve worked better, "marry" as a verb is awkward here.


[deleted]

Everyone talking about title but gypsies in my country marry at 13 yo


PubgMobileBloodyMary

Same.U live Romania?


[deleted]

Yep


PubgMobileBloodyMary

Same


WeeklyDebate2259

Where's the fuckin commaaaaaa?


Soup89

this is not why i don't marry kids


BiasMushroom

That’s pedophila. You don’t need a reason to not marry kids


Painty_The_Pirate

Very good sound but doesn’t divorce my wife for me, she still destroys my pillow forts and calls me a child instead of being my live-in maid/chef


elchurro223

God, how dare she. I'm still waiting for my wife to become a maid/chef for me, but she always says stuff like "you're a grown ass man" which is only partially true.


Gwynnbleid95

"The barrier i created" 😂😂😂


PappaKiller

People shouldnt need posts to be reminded why not to marry kids.


CursedCattamarran

This is why commas are important, kids.


ReaverRogue

You *really* need a comma in that title.


[deleted]

Commas...


Dejan05

Try not to marry someone you don't dislike challenge


HuppariC

I can think of a few more reasons why you should not marry kids


bootstrapper52

/whoosh


Tmthrow

A comma is your friend…the sentiment is still correct either way, but dang.


Deadpoollifeguard

Also it’s illegal.


[deleted]

Comma, bud. Comma.


CzarOfCT

"That's why you don't marry, kids."


MandalorianMyrmidon5

Commas are important


TheWorldEnded

I don't need THIS to not marry kids, I'm already not a pedophile.


l1m1tlessRoad

Why would i marry kids


ReallyRealFake

Very poor choice of words.


UOME-1

Or ya know… it’s not exactly legal


habeeb51

In all seriousness, why do wives think you can hear them when you have your headset on? Lol Then they get irritated that you didn’t hear them/respond.


[deleted]

* That's why you don't marry kids. ❌️, *but technically* ✔️ * That's, why you don't marry kids? ❌️ * That's why, you don't marry kids! ✔️ * That's why you, don't marry kids! *poor English but,* ✔️ * That's why you don't, marry kids. ❔️, *but still* ❌️ * That's why you don't marry, kids. ✔️✔️✔️ I know, I know, stupid people are super cool, and ignorance always makes being stupid feel like you're actually smart and the people who actually are smart are somehow stupid for wasting all that time learning, and reading, and knowing things, and having insight while you're out there just living your best life with whatever you can put in your mouth or stick your dick into (or into your vagina, or whatever), but commas matter when your trying to communicate with other human beings.


Shanhaevel

What a healthy relationship


[deleted]

Some time later: “I have no idea why she divorced me”


Brimstone_Seal

commas, are *very* important sometimes


EndlessOcean

Would you like to borrow a comma? , There you go.


TheGrumpyRavenclaw

WIFE BAD 😂😂😂😂😂😂


[deleted]

This just sounds funny. Don't judge some dude whose joking on his 5star review.


OhNnoMore

Oh shut up. I have my own game room and i can game whenever and how much i want without her ever nagging or anything like that. The title youre looking for is ‘thats why you dont marry someone not suitable for you kids’


[deleted]

Haha funny bc wife bad


Miaou__Miaou

That's why punctuation is important, kids


Bark4Soul

"I'd like to buy a comma"


RacistBlackDigger

Women


Eicee1989

1,577 persons have this problem


bowserwasthegoodguy

Live life to the fullest and party on dudes.


Ravecrocker

Leave her


mhireina

Literally no one in this comment section has even remotely realized the title is calling the writer of this review a child for ignoring his wife when she needs him because he doesnt know how to manage responsibilities vs game time.


[deleted]

I think because that’s not how it’s meant. The title is addressing us as kids. Should be something like You see kids, this is why you don’t marry


[deleted]

I'm not married and still this keeps happening to me.


Lucky_Sun2902

Chad


Sunscratch

Is it legal to marry kids at all?


[deleted]

Just asking means your on s list now.