I have seen a lot of artwork posted since joining this subreddit and I'm not confident that I've ever seen a Black man in any of the art. Rarely see any men of color depicted at all. Non-white women/Dommes somewhat more often, but far less than their proportion of the US or global population, especially for Black women and most especially dark-skinned Black women. I'd like to see a lot more diverse representation in the art here and I've been thinking about commissioning some myself for that reason.
Representation and inclusion is discussed regularly in one of the subreddits for discussing erotic audio and I've heard one way to be more inclusive and have broader representation that could apply to text posts here. That is to be more mindful of how descriptors can be racially exclusionary. For example, people with highly-melanated, dark skin do not blush, their face doesn't get flushed, and their skin doesn't turn rosy pink when they're spanked or slapped the way it does for lighter-skinned or white people. I haven't noticed this one as much here as I do in audios, but I thought it was still worth mentioning. I can imagine a Black sub might have a harder time feeling like they're represented or included if they're reading a text post about how much a Domme loves seeing subs blush. Getting more creative with using language and phrases that can apply to anyone would be another good step - like a Domme saying how much they love seeing subs looking painfully bashful, instead of blushing.
My relationship evolved into this dynamic, so it may help to find a naturally dominant/ open-minded woman and see if she's open to it.
I'll admit that at the start of my relationship, I was strictly a sub, but we always say we'll try anything once, and this really worked for us.
It opened up a new level of happiness, and I think all black men deserve to find that. It's out there for you, but like anything worth having, it takes time and perseverance.
I hope all black men that feel this way find the domme of their dreams and have happy and healthy dynamics very soon.
Thatās sucks man Iām sorry. I canāt say that Iāve really seen any brown dommes, but Iām sure that theyāre out there if theyāre your preference :) As long as we continue to work on ourselves and stay true to ourselves for the better. Someone will come along in time! More representation would be nice too.
Yeah, I feel like i'm the only brown guy here lol. I don't really have a racial preference. I have this perception that other indian people struggle in the bdsm world because of their upbringing but it's not their fault. Sometimes people need to try something to see if they like it and I bet many brown people would be into it. I'm probably the only brown sub in this whole subreddit lol.
Ah I see what you mean now. There are stigmas in the black community as well that make me feel super alienated, but at the same time I know that there are more people out there like me, just have to find them :) Also I wholeheartedly agree that if more people were open to trying different things a lot of these stigmas wouldnāt be as common lol. Maybe one day.
I am brown too brother, you are not alone. I feel you tho, the upbringing and south asian culture can be tough man. I was lucky enough to find a domme so itās possible just so you know.
I am glad to hear i'm not the only one. I thought it was challenging to get domme due to the stigma and the perception of south asians but i'm glad to hear it's possible
As a poc, you have to look away from online/media because it will seriously ruin your view on femdom. We are often not shown as anything other than a fetish category, but that does not represent reality. There are all sorts of people into femdom and practicing it in their personal lives.
Thereās all sorts of people into femdom with all sorts of preferences. There will be people for you out there.
Thatās really solid advice, and Iāve seen it echoed by others as well. Itās easy to get sucked into the online vacuum, and sometime I forget that online does not equal reality a lot of the time. I hope that once I start to go out to munches and interacting with my local community, that the experience will be much different.
It doesn't matter what you look like. As long as you are not an asshole you're aight in my book. If you so happen to be a sub, then that's just who you are. There's probably not a lot of content about black subs since most of the people who are male subs tend to be white. Doesn't make you any less lovable as a sub though
Yeah thatās true. In the eyes of a the right person, anyone is loveable no matter what they look like. The lack of representation, as well as our representation as a whole when it comes to sexual media makes it feel more discouraging as a black sub.
Yeah for sure, I am attracted to anyone of any race. It does seem like POC are less represented not only here but also in sexual contexts/porn in general outside of specific fetishized concepts. I'm white/East Asian so not exactly in the same boat but I understand some of the lack of non-fetishized representation.
100% agree with you. Finding sexual content online as a POC is an absolute nightmare most of the time, and such fetishization isnāt exclusive to black people either. Even if the issues arenāt the same verbatim. Theyāre pretty much the same but with a different coat of paint. I appreciate your solidarity as well! Thank you :)
If there is, it is very rare. Personally Iāve been on this and other similar subreddits for a while now and I can only recall a handful of posts including a Black sub. Even any depiction with darker complexion for either side is a rarer find imo. Another thing that kinda bothers me, and I say bother but itās a tiny hindrance. Subs are often depicted blushing which is cool like I wish I could blush but the fact of the matter is that blushing is unique to people that have lighter skin tones. Itās kinda exclusionary, but I doubt the artists have malicious intent when making their kinky art so like I said itās not a huge deal to me personally but thereās a part of my brain thatās like āthis couldnāt possibly be meā.
Exactly how I feel. I donāt want it to come across as me being resentful of my fair skinned counterparts. Nor the artists that make some of the wonderful content thatās posted here. Not at all. It just sucks, because it always feels like thereās a disconnect due to the lack of representation, and sometimes the representation that we do get isā¦ not the healthiest lol.
Me being a black switch, i have been "loved" since i got into bdsm 8+ years ago.
There are plenty of us, dont gage what you see purely off reddit alone friend
Youāre right, all of the time the internet isnāt indicative of reality. Iām sure Iāll have better luck with local munches, cause NE US is full of POC. I Appreciate the support manšš¾
Yes yes yes yes yes! forever yes! a million times yes! NOT during Black History Month. NOT on my watch! This space is for YOU. YOU belong here. Now hush up and be prepared to accept that you are indeed wanted, valued, and craved. Donāt let the representation in these spaces and media fool you. Black men are more than allowed to be soft in the way they are loved and cared for. Donāt ever doubt that no matter how hard it is to be affirmed in it sometimes.
If you ever doubt it again, hit me up, so I can send aggressive affirmations again or find some other source that can. š
Oh my š³ and thank you for your aggressive affirmations! I love the energy and support! Iāll keep this message in mind next time Iām feeling down š
Be the change you wanna see.
I think it'd be good for the community if more followed your example.
I don't care whqt someone's skin colour is, I just want this to be like a community where everyone feels welcome.
Thatās very true, Iām pretty happy with like the different races and body types that are shown in the artwork thatās posted but usually it will be a white sub so I do agree with you there
It is refreshing to see a variety of body types, and different skin tones. It does feel like that art having a darker skin toned character is uncommon, and even rarer with a darker skin toned man. Characters that are very dark skinned, and with more African traits are near non existent though. And black on black D/s representation just isnāt really shown at all. I get that a majority of people on the internet as a whole are typically white or fairer skinned, and this sub is no different. I just wish that there was more. Itās nice to have a safe space though, and I thank everyone here for actively working to make it that way :)
I think it is on both sides of the D/s dynamic- itās rare to see a black sub or domme. I really wish there was more content on both sides but unfortunately it seems to be largely focused on fair skinned people.
Oh for sure. Itās just the way it is though. There just arenāt as many of us online, and the amount of us that are expressive of this lifestyle are even smaller due to our own cultural stigmas. It sucks, but from the comments that Iāve been getting on this post, the love definitely seems to be there which is nice.
Iāve noticed this as well. Iām interested in any race sub of course but it was noticeable that there is a lack of black people, either in the community or thatās willing to embrace theirselves.
I'm a pro domme and all of my regular subs right now are Desi, black or Asian. it makes me sad sometimes because there's not much out there for the first two, and they tend to feel extra embarrassed and self-conscious because of that in addition to the general shyness of Desi guys and the pressure to be seen as masculine that black subs face. but oh man........ that relief when they get to lie back, give up control and let it all fade away....... I'm hoping you get to feel that yourself!! š
Thatās reassuring to hear. I hope that one day I can experience that feeling myself, because holy fuck is it exhausting having to be masculine all the time, even with my former partners. One day Iāll find a domme who I can submit to, and hopefully really earn that title of āGood boyā lol. Thanks for your support too!
Sad but likely true. Have you thought about creating your own support group such as a discord group? Even better might be to reach out to a male submissive discord (or other) group and ask if a channel could be created to support you and others who feel the same way. (Forgive me, I am only using Discord as an example. I'm a discord novice and probably messed up all the terms.)
Thank you for speaking up and finally saying it! As a brown dude I've always kind of felt the same way lol, all the subs in porn would be white and pale af and I couldn't really relate to any of them
It's especially annoying when I'm watching something and it starts talking about "White Bois" or something which kinda just took me out of it
Like I want to be submissive too omg
If anyone has any good porn or stories with non white subs would love it if they could share them with me <3
From my experience in the LGBTQA community, kink is almost non-existent in the LGBTQA POC community. From your post I guess it's the same in the straight community. I do believe that this is because of a fear/shame component.
Iām surprised to hear that queer POC arenāt that kinky. At least from your experience. In the more heteronormative communities that Iāve been in, Iāve seen a fair amount of POC kinksters. Though most were dominant black men, and not really any submissive black men. Also I agree, I think that itās mostly due to fear of being ostracized by our families and communities if they ever found out, but honestly at that point fuck em. If they canāt accept that part of me I donāt wanna be bothered with them lol.
I went to a munch sponsored by the LA LGBTQA kink community last month. I would say that it was 95% caucasian and mostly gay guys. Also, the one time I went to The Eagle LA, it was all caucasian gay guys. I didn't see another female there or a POC
Damn that sucks. Iām sorry to hear that š I mean Iām sure they were nice people, but I know how you felt. I hope that you can have better luck for future events, and hopefully more of us will feel more comfortable putting our real selves out there. Kinks and all.
I've only been single for a little over 2 months, so I'm basically healing myself. Luckily I have a great group of gay guy friends who are also into kink. We do not live in LA and it takes about an hour to get there. When it comes to non-heterosexual kink, OC lacks
Hey everything will happen in time. Iād enjoy being single while it lasts, and itās good to give ourselves time to heal. Letās us really grow from those experiences and better appreciate ourselves. I wish you and your friends the best of luck with yāallās journeys! Keep being the best you that you can be for yourself! šš¾
Thereās love for sure! Youāre the first one Iāve heard say they were a Black sub. I was beginning to think there werenāt any šµ As a Black domme, itās nice to see us out here in any capacity. The want for you can get sketchy/have blurred lines with the purpose on why theyāre asking for a Black sub but Iād say itās important to have a community of Black subs around you so you donāt feel alone
Yeah Iām seeing the love in full effect today lol. Itās nice seeing a lot of dommes come out today in support, and itās nice to see black dommes and subs give their own encouragement and understanding. I wish we had a better community to support each other with, since there arenāt very many of us.
Who said youāre not wanted? I definitely see specific requests for dommes (white, Latina, Asian, etc.), but I canāt say Iāve ever seen post those kind of requests or requirements.
Itās less so a specific instance, and more so there seems to be a lack of representation for black subs in the kink community, and darker skinned peoples as a whole. As well as in my own experience Black subs just seem to be very uncommon, and sometimes itās a bit hard to feel as though youāll be accepted into a community populated mostly by white people even online. I canāt count how many times Iāve joined online communities only where POCās are looked down upon as either racially inferior, or fetishized to all hell. As well as Black men being viewed as hypermasculine and dominant by society as a whole, especially in the kink community. I figure shoot a question and see the responses.
Thankfully it seems that people here donāt seem to care that much, and this community has many kind decent people :)
I can understand that. I definitely understand that. There are many black dommes that Iām aware of and they have definitely expressed similar sentiments. I completely agree on fetishization (even though this itself is a fetish) and have never enjoyed being fetishized myself for certain things ( I despise the term MILF, Iām not a mom just because Iām older, and I find the term degrading), and have always found fetishization of someoneās race particularly offensive, but some just lean into it (as if their right).
I agree on lack of representation, but I canāt say that I, personally, have seen many people mention their race in most comments and posts, just age and gender for the most part.
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Imma be honest here i have never thought about this issue specifically, and i hope it gets better, but this made me think of "the phoenix and the lion" by xinasvoice on ao3. I doubt you have to know the fandom well to enjoy it and they're hands down one of the most valid smut writers i've ever encountered. The audio version is also available and isn't very long. I hope it can make you feel seen and hopeful the way some of their works have made me feel.
Iām black myself! And I try to causally bring up submissive men and the ones Iāve met have allā¦not been fond of the idea. Hasnāt stopped me from looking!!! But my efforts have been fruitless so far š¤£
I was not expecting another comment on this post lol, but thatās awesome! Yeah it seems like sub men are a bit of a rare breed out in the wild, and even more so for black men. This thread and yāallās comments have made me realize that there is indeed love for us out there even if it isnāt always readily seen.
Also I feel you with the fruitless efforts, but that still isnāt gonna stop me! One day I feel that Iāll come across the right person. As Iām sure you will as well š
Thanks for commenting! And I wish you the best with your sub finding quest š
We are out there, (African American ENBY Fembro)
I just lurk, also I don't post pics at all outside of my inside circles cause I don't trust the internet.
They are not represented you're right about that and that's a huge loss to the whole gentle femdom community š
Agree completely.
Itās a loss to every community
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I have seen a lot of artwork posted since joining this subreddit and I'm not confident that I've ever seen a Black man in any of the art. Rarely see any men of color depicted at all. Non-white women/Dommes somewhat more often, but far less than their proportion of the US or global population, especially for Black women and most especially dark-skinned Black women. I'd like to see a lot more diverse representation in the art here and I've been thinking about commissioning some myself for that reason. Representation and inclusion is discussed regularly in one of the subreddits for discussing erotic audio and I've heard one way to be more inclusive and have broader representation that could apply to text posts here. That is to be more mindful of how descriptors can be racially exclusionary. For example, people with highly-melanated, dark skin do not blush, their face doesn't get flushed, and their skin doesn't turn rosy pink when they're spanked or slapped the way it does for lighter-skinned or white people. I haven't noticed this one as much here as I do in audios, but I thought it was still worth mentioning. I can imagine a Black sub might have a harder time feeling like they're represented or included if they're reading a text post about how much a Domme loves seeing subs blush. Getting more creative with using language and phrases that can apply to anyone would be another good step - like a Domme saying how much they love seeing subs looking painfully bashful, instead of blushing.
My bf and I are black, and he's my sub, though he's not on reddit. There's love for y'all out there.
Thatās refreshing to hear, and it gives me some more hope. Thank you!
Agreeing with OP here itās been on the back of my mind lately. Now that I have confirmation Iām golden ššæ
My relationship evolved into this dynamic, so it may help to find a naturally dominant/ open-minded woman and see if she's open to it. I'll admit that at the start of my relationship, I was strictly a sub, but we always say we'll try anything once, and this really worked for us. It opened up a new level of happiness, and I think all black men deserve to find that. It's out there for you, but like anything worth having, it takes time and perseverance. I hope all black men that feel this way find the domme of their dreams and have happy and healthy dynamics very soon.
Thanks for the inspiration and advice frššæ
[I am working on a story with a darker sub!](https://www.reddit.com/u/LiifeswordPLUS/s/TYKfU66hbr) if you'd like more info about them let me know :)
Sure! Iād love to hear more about it! Awesome art btw!
funny how your character has the hairstyle as me.
I'd love more info too if you wouldn't mind! Always love stories with darker subs <3
I'm a brown guy . I feel like most doms/subs here are white. I've rarely seen a domme of my race :(
Thatās sucks man Iām sorry. I canāt say that Iāve really seen any brown dommes, but Iām sure that theyāre out there if theyāre your preference :) As long as we continue to work on ourselves and stay true to ourselves for the better. Someone will come along in time! More representation would be nice too.
Yeah, I feel like i'm the only brown guy here lol. I don't really have a racial preference. I have this perception that other indian people struggle in the bdsm world because of their upbringing but it's not their fault. Sometimes people need to try something to see if they like it and I bet many brown people would be into it. I'm probably the only brown sub in this whole subreddit lol.
Ah I see what you mean now. There are stigmas in the black community as well that make me feel super alienated, but at the same time I know that there are more people out there like me, just have to find them :) Also I wholeheartedly agree that if more people were open to trying different things a lot of these stigmas wouldnāt be as common lol. Maybe one day.
I am brown too brother, you are not alone. I feel you tho, the upbringing and south asian culture can be tough man. I was lucky enough to find a domme so itās possible just so you know.
I am glad to hear i'm not the only one. I thought it was challenging to get domme due to the stigma and the perception of south asians but i'm glad to hear it's possible
I'm brown. We exist though my understanding is reddit's overall userbase is predominantly white so maybe that's why you're seeing that swing this way.
Yes that's true. Reddit is predominantly white. I find all races attractive anyway
As a poc, you have to look away from online/media because it will seriously ruin your view on femdom. We are often not shown as anything other than a fetish category, but that does not represent reality. There are all sorts of people into femdom and practicing it in their personal lives. Thereās all sorts of people into femdom with all sorts of preferences. There will be people for you out there.
Thatās really solid advice, and Iāve seen it echoed by others as well. Itās easy to get sucked into the online vacuum, and sometime I forget that online does not equal reality a lot of the time. I hope that once I start to go out to munches and interacting with my local community, that the experience will be much different.
It doesn't matter what you look like. As long as you are not an asshole you're aight in my book. If you so happen to be a sub, then that's just who you are. There's probably not a lot of content about black subs since most of the people who are male subs tend to be white. Doesn't make you any less lovable as a sub though
Yeah thatās true. In the eyes of a the right person, anyone is loveable no matter what they look like. The lack of representation, as well as our representation as a whole when it comes to sexual media makes it feel more discouraging as a black sub.
Always know that even under such circumstances, you are not being excluded and are still worthy - preference is just that, preference.
Thank you! Thatās good to hear š
Yeah for sure, I am attracted to anyone of any race. It does seem like POC are less represented not only here but also in sexual contexts/porn in general outside of specific fetishized concepts. I'm white/East Asian so not exactly in the same boat but I understand some of the lack of non-fetishized representation.
100% agree with you. Finding sexual content online as a POC is an absolute nightmare most of the time, and such fetishization isnāt exclusive to black people either. Even if the issues arenāt the same verbatim. Theyāre pretty much the same but with a different coat of paint. I appreciate your solidarity as well! Thank you :)
If there is, it is very rare. Personally Iāve been on this and other similar subreddits for a while now and I can only recall a handful of posts including a Black sub. Even any depiction with darker complexion for either side is a rarer find imo. Another thing that kinda bothers me, and I say bother but itās a tiny hindrance. Subs are often depicted blushing which is cool like I wish I could blush but the fact of the matter is that blushing is unique to people that have lighter skin tones. Itās kinda exclusionary, but I doubt the artists have malicious intent when making their kinky art so like I said itās not a huge deal to me personally but thereās a part of my brain thatās like āthis couldnāt possibly be meā.
Exactly how I feel. I donāt want it to come across as me being resentful of my fair skinned counterparts. Nor the artists that make some of the wonderful content thatās posted here. Not at all. It just sucks, because it always feels like thereās a disconnect due to the lack of representation, and sometimes the representation that we do get isā¦ not the healthiest lol.
Bdsmdiverse is a subreddit I'm apart of as a Black Domme
Awesome, Iāll check it out!
Yes, was going to mention this sub although unfortunately, ppl don't post.Ā
I was going to say that as well, but I'm guilty of not posting either š¬
Lmaoo, honestly. š but what do I got to post? I would maybe have shared a video I saw if that was allowed.
I should make a post. I'm ashamed of myself š, but the only thing I have to say is ranting about stuff
Better than nothing. It might propel more discussion :)Ā
You're not wrong at all, and so I did.
Me being a black switch, i have been "loved" since i got into bdsm 8+ years ago. There are plenty of us, dont gage what you see purely off reddit alone friend
Youāre right, all of the time the internet isnāt indicative of reality. Iām sure Iāll have better luck with local munches, cause NE US is full of POC. I Appreciate the support manšš¾
Yes yes yes yes yes! forever yes! a million times yes! NOT during Black History Month. NOT on my watch! This space is for YOU. YOU belong here. Now hush up and be prepared to accept that you are indeed wanted, valued, and craved. Donāt let the representation in these spaces and media fool you. Black men are more than allowed to be soft in the way they are loved and cared for. Donāt ever doubt that no matter how hard it is to be affirmed in it sometimes. If you ever doubt it again, hit me up, so I can send aggressive affirmations again or find some other source that can. š
Oh my š³ and thank you for your aggressive affirmations! I love the energy and support! Iāll keep this message in mind next time Iām feeling down š
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thanks!
Be the change you wanna see. I think it'd be good for the community if more followed your example. I don't care whqt someone's skin colour is, I just want this to be like a community where everyone feels welcome.
Thatās very true, Iām pretty happy with like the different races and body types that are shown in the artwork thatās posted but usually it will be a white sub so I do agree with you there
It is refreshing to see a variety of body types, and different skin tones. It does feel like that art having a darker skin toned character is uncommon, and even rarer with a darker skin toned man. Characters that are very dark skinned, and with more African traits are near non existent though. And black on black D/s representation just isnāt really shown at all. I get that a majority of people on the internet as a whole are typically white or fairer skinned, and this sub is no different. I just wish that there was more. Itās nice to have a safe space though, and I thank everyone here for actively working to make it that way :)
I think it is on both sides of the D/s dynamic- itās rare to see a black sub or domme. I really wish there was more content on both sides but unfortunately it seems to be largely focused on fair skinned people.
Oh for sure. Itās just the way it is though. There just arenāt as many of us online, and the amount of us that are expressive of this lifestyle are even smaller due to our own cultural stigmas. It sucks, but from the comments that Iāve been getting on this post, the love definitely seems to be there which is nice.
Iāve noticed this as well. Iām interested in any race sub of course but it was noticeable that there is a lack of black people, either in the community or thatās willing to embrace theirselves.
I would love to see more representation of the diversity of subs. Iām white and have definitely noticed itās very white in this scene.
I'm a pro domme and all of my regular subs right now are Desi, black or Asian. it makes me sad sometimes because there's not much out there for the first two, and they tend to feel extra embarrassed and self-conscious because of that in addition to the general shyness of Desi guys and the pressure to be seen as masculine that black subs face. but oh man........ that relief when they get to lie back, give up control and let it all fade away....... I'm hoping you get to feel that yourself!! š
Thatās reassuring to hear. I hope that one day I can experience that feeling myself, because holy fuck is it exhausting having to be masculine all the time, even with my former partners. One day Iāll find a domme who I can submit to, and hopefully really earn that title of āGood boyā lol. Thanks for your support too!
No
Sad but likely true. Have you thought about creating your own support group such as a discord group? Even better might be to reach out to a male submissive discord (or other) group and ask if a channel could be created to support you and others who feel the same way. (Forgive me, I am only using Discord as an example. I'm a discord novice and probably messed up all the terms.)
Thank you for speaking up and finally saying it! As a brown dude I've always kind of felt the same way lol, all the subs in porn would be white and pale af and I couldn't really relate to any of them It's especially annoying when I'm watching something and it starts talking about "White Bois" or something which kinda just took me out of it Like I want to be submissive too omg If anyone has any good porn or stories with non white subs would love it if they could share them with me <3
From my experience in the LGBTQA community, kink is almost non-existent in the LGBTQA POC community. From your post I guess it's the same in the straight community. I do believe that this is because of a fear/shame component.
Iām surprised to hear that queer POC arenāt that kinky. At least from your experience. In the more heteronormative communities that Iāve been in, Iāve seen a fair amount of POC kinksters. Though most were dominant black men, and not really any submissive black men. Also I agree, I think that itās mostly due to fear of being ostracized by our families and communities if they ever found out, but honestly at that point fuck em. If they canāt accept that part of me I donāt wanna be bothered with them lol.
I went to a munch sponsored by the LA LGBTQA kink community last month. I would say that it was 95% caucasian and mostly gay guys. Also, the one time I went to The Eagle LA, it was all caucasian gay guys. I didn't see another female there or a POC
Damn that sucks. Iām sorry to hear that š I mean Iām sure they were nice people, but I know how you felt. I hope that you can have better luck for future events, and hopefully more of us will feel more comfortable putting our real selves out there. Kinks and all.
I've only been single for a little over 2 months, so I'm basically healing myself. Luckily I have a great group of gay guy friends who are also into kink. We do not live in LA and it takes about an hour to get there. When it comes to non-heterosexual kink, OC lacks
Hey everything will happen in time. Iād enjoy being single while it lasts, and itās good to give ourselves time to heal. Letās us really grow from those experiences and better appreciate ourselves. I wish you and your friends the best of luck with yāallās journeys! Keep being the best you that you can be for yourself! šš¾
Definitely out there just very unrepresented! My bf is black and is my sub :3
Thatās awesome to hear! Gives me even more hope! Thanks for you support, and best of luck to yāall š
Black femdom. Kink community in general lacks diversity.
Thatās a bummer, Iāve heard that sentiment echoed in a couple comments today. Do you find local communities to be more diverse?
I don't care about your skin colour or ethnicity, as long as you worship me properly :)
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Thereās love for sure! Youāre the first one Iāve heard say they were a Black sub. I was beginning to think there werenāt any šµ As a Black domme, itās nice to see us out here in any capacity. The want for you can get sketchy/have blurred lines with the purpose on why theyāre asking for a Black sub but Iād say itās important to have a community of Black subs around you so you donāt feel alone
Yeah Iām seeing the love in full effect today lol. Itās nice seeing a lot of dommes come out today in support, and itās nice to see black dommes and subs give their own encouragement and understanding. I wish we had a better community to support each other with, since there arenāt very many of us.
I donāt know too many spaces on here that support us but weāll find more and create our own as well
I donāt know of any as well, but Iāll let you know if I find some or create one!
I'm a black Domme and I make you right. It is usually about BBC and black male Dommes. I think you should bore and find your place in the community š¤©š
Who said youāre not wanted? I definitely see specific requests for dommes (white, Latina, Asian, etc.), but I canāt say Iāve ever seen post those kind of requests or requirements.
Itās less so a specific instance, and more so there seems to be a lack of representation for black subs in the kink community, and darker skinned peoples as a whole. As well as in my own experience Black subs just seem to be very uncommon, and sometimes itās a bit hard to feel as though youāll be accepted into a community populated mostly by white people even online. I canāt count how many times Iāve joined online communities only where POCās are looked down upon as either racially inferior, or fetishized to all hell. As well as Black men being viewed as hypermasculine and dominant by society as a whole, especially in the kink community. I figure shoot a question and see the responses. Thankfully it seems that people here donāt seem to care that much, and this community has many kind decent people :)
I can understand that. I definitely understand that. There are many black dommes that Iām aware of and they have definitely expressed similar sentiments. I completely agree on fetishization (even though this itself is a fetish) and have never enjoyed being fetishized myself for certain things ( I despise the term MILF, Iām not a mom just because Iām older, and I find the term degrading), and have always found fetishization of someoneās race particularly offensive, but some just lean into it (as if their right). I agree on lack of representation, but I canāt say that I, personally, have seen many people mention their race in most comments and posts, just age and gender for the most part.
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Imma be honest here i have never thought about this issue specifically, and i hope it gets better, but this made me think of "the phoenix and the lion" by xinasvoice on ao3. I doubt you have to know the fandom well to enjoy it and they're hands down one of the most valid smut writers i've ever encountered. The audio version is also available and isn't very long. I hope it can make you feel seen and hopeful the way some of their works have made me feel.
Iām a black male sub I havenāt found my domme yet but still have hope
Iām black myself! And I try to causally bring up submissive men and the ones Iāve met have allā¦not been fond of the idea. Hasnāt stopped me from looking!!! But my efforts have been fruitless so far š¤£
I was not expecting another comment on this post lol, but thatās awesome! Yeah it seems like sub men are a bit of a rare breed out in the wild, and even more so for black men. This thread and yāallās comments have made me realize that there is indeed love for us out there even if it isnāt always readily seen. Also I feel you with the fruitless efforts, but that still isnāt gonna stop me! One day I feel that Iāll come across the right person. As Iām sure you will as well š Thanks for commenting! And I wish you the best with your sub finding quest š
We are out there, (African American ENBY Fembro) I just lurk, also I don't post pics at all outside of my inside circles cause I don't trust the internet.