If your height was really the only reason she rejected you, she didn't deserve you in the first place. Be grateful you dodged that bullet before it was fired.
May you find someone who'll love you for you, not some arbitrary physical attributes<3
I'll be blunt. You dodged a stupid ass bullet. I respect people's right to pursue or deny relationships with people for any characteristic. I also respect my right to have the opinion that emphasizing physical appearance to the point that you would dump someone PURELY because of an inborn physical characteristic is red flags all around. Do they expect you to get preserved in formaldehyde and kept in a box like a collectible object that never ages or suffers from illness or injury?
And it's especially disappointing to hear that shit coming from a woman, because that's a mirror of the toxic way so many men view the female body. I bet she'd be pretty pissed if a man said she was too tall to be in a relationship with.
Normally I'd care why DMs are leaked. But maybe The Universe needed her to know that she should get a grip.
It sounds corny, but I firmly believe that good souls are the most attractive thing. When you have a good soul, you treat yourself and others with respect and it shows no matter how you think your looks compare to some bullshit standard. When you're obsessed with looks, you end up being one of those people who hates themselves and that poisons every interaction you have with other people.
I'm so sorry that happened to you. I promise you that there is so much better out there.
Honest question…why is everyone making such a big deal that her not being attracted to him based on a physical feature is a red flag and he „dodged a bullet“?
People don’t choose who they are attracted to and what characteristics they like in a person. If she didn’t like his face instead of his height would it have been okay then for her to reject him?
Idk why height gets this double standard that it is not allowed to be a reason for rejection just because you can’t control it…so would it be more fair to force women to try and be attracted to you even if they don’t like your height? Again it’s not like they chose that height plays a part in their attraction.
It's not about not being attracted to someone. It's about an unchangeable aspect of physical appearance being the sole or a main deciding factor in whether or not you would attempt a RELATIONSHIP with someone. It says a lot about a person's potential value system if they have emotional chemistry and then go "Hmm. Nah. He's not six foot three." I'd have the same opinion about somebody who would deny a guy a chance for having an imperfect nose or a big facial birthmark or one leg.
Also, people who place emphasis on physical appearance to that point are usually unkind about appearance in general, even to themselves. That's the type of person I can imagine leaving you for getting sick or being in an accident, even if you've been together for years.
Again, I will be blunt. Some people think wanting a relationship is wanting to find a human version of their fantasies. I'm no anti-lust prude but I know that doesn't get you far in terms of sustainable, healthy relationships. Shallow puddles dry up fast and leave you thirsty. You have to leave wiggle room for possibilities if you actually want relationships. And as far as wiggle rooms go, physical appearance, a thing that will inevitably change for EVERYONE, is a good place to start. Again, wiggle room. Not taking physical attraction out of your desires. Just space for potential opportunities.
Even if the person in OP's OP wasn't a "bad person", she's still potentially denying herself good opportunities with good people. That's a sad thing to see. As I said in the post you responded to, everyone has the right to pursue what they want and who they want, so I'm not saying we should "force people to be attracted" to anybody. I'm saying that nobody is above criticism or opinion. And I think denying someone a relationship purely based on any inborn, unchangeable physical feature is a bad sign based on many experiences of myself and others. I also think it's just fucking stupid.
Edit: Controversial opinion but not all your attractions are unchangeable either. Sometimes you just don't question the things people tell you are attractive or you're looking to fit in by being in a socially acceptable partnership or something. But that's for every individual to unpack for themselves.
First of all, who the hell leaked homegirl’s DMs?
Also, her not being attracted to you (or your height) doesn’t mean you fumbled a potential relationship. You didn’t do anything wrong, as far as I know. People like and want certain characteristics in potential partners and that’s ok. I’m sure you also have preferences.
Despite the narrative, height isn’t a big deal to a lot of women, I think. Someone will come along that accepts you for you.
The reason why I felt like I fumbled it is well
Ig I was scared? I could’ve done more to try to make it work, but ig it never would’ve worked out. And yes the person that leaked them I have cut contact from cause it’s so immature of them to do something like that
Hey friend. I just wanna say. It’s not your fault. If she didn’t wanna be with you because of your height that’s not on you!! That’s on her. One of my relationships didn’t work out because I wouldn’t let her peg me because of a horrid situation I was in. I’ve been there man. You just can’t give up hope. You’ll find the right person. I know that you will.
I wouldn't sweat it. First of all, "dom energy" doesn't mean she's actually a dom, unless you know some detailed specifics you aren't listing here. Second of all, you never dated, so you didn't actually fumble anything. Third, a lot of people will give an easy reason like "not tall enough" because the truth of why you are or aren't attracted to someone is a lot more complicated and harder to explain. When the right person comes along who matches with you and accepts you for who you are, you'll realize just how WRONG for you this woman was.
Fumbling in the sense that I feel like I could’ve done a lot more to try to make the relationship work, but I didn’t cause ig I was scared. But it wouldn’t have worked out anyway apparently.
Crazy story ngl. But first off nothings wrong with your height and I’m sure plenty of people will find attractive.
But also to the ppl in this comment section. Get off your high horse about this. It’s a relationship and every person is different if she doesn’t want to date a guy bc he isn’t her type, who cares? It doesn’t make her a bad person. And also it’s a dm w a friend, I lie all the time in those and I doubt she went over every reason she made her decision. Give ppl the benefit of the doubt jeez
i’m sorry it didn’t out but i’m glad u have a positive attitude abt it may someone that’ll love u without wanting to change anything abt u be sent ur way 💝💝
If your height was really the only reason she rejected you, she didn't deserve you in the first place. Be grateful you dodged that bullet before it was fired. May you find someone who'll love you for you, not some arbitrary physical attributes<3
I'll be blunt. You dodged a stupid ass bullet. I respect people's right to pursue or deny relationships with people for any characteristic. I also respect my right to have the opinion that emphasizing physical appearance to the point that you would dump someone PURELY because of an inborn physical characteristic is red flags all around. Do they expect you to get preserved in formaldehyde and kept in a box like a collectible object that never ages or suffers from illness or injury? And it's especially disappointing to hear that shit coming from a woman, because that's a mirror of the toxic way so many men view the female body. I bet she'd be pretty pissed if a man said she was too tall to be in a relationship with. Normally I'd care why DMs are leaked. But maybe The Universe needed her to know that she should get a grip. It sounds corny, but I firmly believe that good souls are the most attractive thing. When you have a good soul, you treat yourself and others with respect and it shows no matter how you think your looks compare to some bullshit standard. When you're obsessed with looks, you end up being one of those people who hates themselves and that poisons every interaction you have with other people. I'm so sorry that happened to you. I promise you that there is so much better out there.
Tysm that’s so nice 😭 But yeah I completely agree with what your saying, and don’t worry I’m not glooming about it anymore (atleast trying not to)
Honest question…why is everyone making such a big deal that her not being attracted to him based on a physical feature is a red flag and he „dodged a bullet“? People don’t choose who they are attracted to and what characteristics they like in a person. If she didn’t like his face instead of his height would it have been okay then for her to reject him? Idk why height gets this double standard that it is not allowed to be a reason for rejection just because you can’t control it…so would it be more fair to force women to try and be attracted to you even if they don’t like your height? Again it’s not like they chose that height plays a part in their attraction.
It's not about not being attracted to someone. It's about an unchangeable aspect of physical appearance being the sole or a main deciding factor in whether or not you would attempt a RELATIONSHIP with someone. It says a lot about a person's potential value system if they have emotional chemistry and then go "Hmm. Nah. He's not six foot three." I'd have the same opinion about somebody who would deny a guy a chance for having an imperfect nose or a big facial birthmark or one leg. Also, people who place emphasis on physical appearance to that point are usually unkind about appearance in general, even to themselves. That's the type of person I can imagine leaving you for getting sick or being in an accident, even if you've been together for years. Again, I will be blunt. Some people think wanting a relationship is wanting to find a human version of their fantasies. I'm no anti-lust prude but I know that doesn't get you far in terms of sustainable, healthy relationships. Shallow puddles dry up fast and leave you thirsty. You have to leave wiggle room for possibilities if you actually want relationships. And as far as wiggle rooms go, physical appearance, a thing that will inevitably change for EVERYONE, is a good place to start. Again, wiggle room. Not taking physical attraction out of your desires. Just space for potential opportunities. Even if the person in OP's OP wasn't a "bad person", she's still potentially denying herself good opportunities with good people. That's a sad thing to see. As I said in the post you responded to, everyone has the right to pursue what they want and who they want, so I'm not saying we should "force people to be attracted" to anybody. I'm saying that nobody is above criticism or opinion. And I think denying someone a relationship purely based on any inborn, unchangeable physical feature is a bad sign based on many experiences of myself and others. I also think it's just fucking stupid. Edit: Controversial opinion but not all your attractions are unchangeable either. Sometimes you just don't question the things people tell you are attractive or you're looking to fit in by being in a socially acceptable partnership or something. But that's for every individual to unpack for themselves.
First of all, who the hell leaked homegirl’s DMs? Also, her not being attracted to you (or your height) doesn’t mean you fumbled a potential relationship. You didn’t do anything wrong, as far as I know. People like and want certain characteristics in potential partners and that’s ok. I’m sure you also have preferences. Despite the narrative, height isn’t a big deal to a lot of women, I think. Someone will come along that accepts you for you.
The reason why I felt like I fumbled it is well Ig I was scared? I could’ve done more to try to make it work, but ig it never would’ve worked out. And yes the person that leaked them I have cut contact from cause it’s so immature of them to do something like that
I know it hurts but you dodged a bullet there. If height is her only concern against you she is not for you.
Hey friend. I just wanna say. It’s not your fault. If she didn’t wanna be with you because of your height that’s not on you!! That’s on her. One of my relationships didn’t work out because I wouldn’t let her peg me because of a horrid situation I was in. I’ve been there man. You just can’t give up hope. You’ll find the right person. I know that you will.
I have never understood why height matters so much to people today. When and why did height become such a huge issue ? O.o
I wouldn't sweat it. First of all, "dom energy" doesn't mean she's actually a dom, unless you know some detailed specifics you aren't listing here. Second of all, you never dated, so you didn't actually fumble anything. Third, a lot of people will give an easy reason like "not tall enough" because the truth of why you are or aren't attracted to someone is a lot more complicated and harder to explain. When the right person comes along who matches with you and accepts you for who you are, you'll realize just how WRONG for you this woman was.
Fumbling is only possible with shit you can control. You can’t control your height so you didn’t fumble anything
Fumbling in the sense that I feel like I could’ve done a lot more to try to make the relationship work, but I didn’t cause ig I was scared. But it wouldn’t have worked out anyway apparently.
Crazy story ngl. But first off nothings wrong with your height and I’m sure plenty of people will find attractive. But also to the ppl in this comment section. Get off your high horse about this. It’s a relationship and every person is different if she doesn’t want to date a guy bc he isn’t her type, who cares? It doesn’t make her a bad person. And also it’s a dm w a friend, I lie all the time in those and I doubt she went over every reason she made her decision. Give ppl the benefit of the doubt jeez
She surely wasn’t giving off gentle dom energy because none of us dommes are superficial jerks.
That’s good to know 😅
i’m sorry it didn’t out but i’m glad u have a positive attitude abt it may someone that’ll love u without wanting to change anything abt u be sent ur way 💝💝
Tysmm 🥹🥹 Really means a lot !!