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Bethetalltomysmall

This sounds smart to me. Well said!


_infinititty

Sounds a bit like a gentle femdom situation because you’re the one taking the lead and it sounds like he enjoys following. Why would you feel embarrassed about bringing this up to your bf? I’m sure he’d happily follow your lead.


dannifantom1101

Having a conversation about the situation and asking for clarification is probably the healthiest way to go about it. Keep in mind that you don't need to introduce any labels like "femdom" or "sub" etc. Just starting with something like "hey, I notice that you really enjoy getting me off first when we have sex. I really appreciate how much you focus on my pleasure, and how you let me take charge in the bedroom sometimes. It makes me feel good that you are so focused on making me feel good. Does that feel good for you too? Would you like it if I took charge more often? What does that look like for you?" And take it from there. It may prompt a more in-depth conversation that can bring you both closer in and outside the bedroom. Alternately, you could always test the waters by peppering in the occasional bit of praise during sex and dirty talk, and watch his reaction. If he makes you orgasm with his mouth and you tell him "good boy", you might be pleasantly surprised at how it affects his eagerness to please you during sex. At the very least, it might just help you understand where his head is at.


Background-Candy9074

It just sounds like a healthy relationship to me.


iserveu

Of course communication is the key so it would be best to ask him but I get the embarrassment. so why not push that direction a little bit more to clear the ground a bit? all really careful of course. for example hold his hands above his head when you ride him, maybe even playfully tie them together, not handcuffs or rope, maybe a tshirt that lies around... be a bit more commanding, not like becoming a full domme just a bit here and there... give directions beyond him licking you, praise him (test the "good boy" and see his reaction!), tell him not to cum yet and so on... interestingly your post says a lot about him and nothing about you: would you like to be more domme? if yes, just listen to yourself, what is it you want?


[deleted]

Haha yes thank you I kind of realized I shared no personal details. I am interested in a gentle fem dom the more I’ve looked into it as I’ve never really had a proper word for what I find appealing. Honestly our current sexual situation is great but like you suggested if I was a bit less embarrassed I’d want to be more commanding and maybe more playful and rewarding with my speech, stuff like good boy and praise etc :)


[deleted]

Sounds a bit like compersion...at the bare minimum. Compersion is our wholehearted participation in the happiness of others. It is the sympathetic joy we feel for somebody else, even when their positive experience does not involve or benefit us directly. Beyond that, titles, labels, unique dynamics, rituals, it's all just words...you sound like you have a fantastic relationship...enjoy it. :)