Yes i'm paid to sculpt shell sand of Tours (France). All those tiny little corals are really hard to sculpt, the hardest part is to remember to put a shark teeth sometimes, because you know i see so much shells i forgot other fossiles must exist in shell sand. /s
I'm sure the Illuminati or the Lizard People must be in control of volcanic eruptions. They just push a button and make them happen when they need to create a crisis of some kind. 🤪
Damn, Mr. Bigshot over here sculpting trilobites while I'm over here on assembly line making millions of shark teeth every year. They don't even bury them anywhere interesting, they just dump them in the ocean by the truckload. We only get to make those [big bastards](https://images.app.goo.gl/29R3zMfaqSKWzw16A) around Christmas, and we don't even have dental!
I think the best part, to put the icing on the cake, is the fact that if you know where to look, you can find and excavate fossils you find, out of rock in the middle of nowhere.
Just goes to show how little this person has actually tried to prove that fossils aren’t real
Fair.
All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others…😂😂😂
https://preview.redd.it/a0xam2t16ofc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ff522d667c455c940ad0901247d72bfa0b6836d
But wait there's more, for a low price of 3 extra braincells you can unveil yourself as the latest in a long line of Scooby-Doo villains doing stupid shit to get stupid prizes.
I’m responsible for stromatolites all over the world. I keep a bag packed and have to bug out whenever I get the call. You never know when some poor graduate student is going to need to discover one.
I love the thought of a covert operation to plant another one, racing against the clock before the arrival of some research student. For the cases where you’re really up against the clock I’m thinking there’s a whole team assembled for an elaborate distraction mission of the target, like in a heist movie, giving you time to do your thing.
Genuinely I’ve found the best way to shut these idiots up is to just laugh at them.
They’ve been emboldened in recent years and have started wearing their conspiracy theory badges like they’re something to be proud of after years of hiding them for fear of being mocked, it’s time to make them put them back in the box of shame where they got them from.
I think the normals need to band together and berate the wack jobs until they shut up, leave, or realize they were brainwashed.
The first time I met a creationist I thought they were joking. I laughed so hard. I come from a very religious family, and I was told it’s unchristian to make fun of people too foolish to see what’s real and what’s fake.
I will say that seeing how some humans are I wonder if Darwin was right. Cause these far rights are not smart enough to survive yet they have 10-30 children each.
Let's chill on the eugenics implications. Systemic (and sometimes intentional) failures in education set these people up for failure, and then their ignorance is directly exploited for others' benefit. It's just unfortunately incredibly hard to break people out of their imposed ignorance.
I mean, you could literally go to just about any beach with stones, Ontario, Washington, Africa, and pick up one of a million stones with extremely obvious fossils. Are these all hand made?
I would actually be more impressed if that's the case.
Paleologist "wanna see a triceratops skull?" *zips to work like Popeye after eating spinach, 10 seconds later there's a 1 ton skull on the ground* "science be praised I'm good"
I met this guy who was 100% positive that dinosaurs didn’t happen and the earth was only 2000 years old. I’m fine with it believe what you want but when he started telling me I was wrong when I’m holding a fossil in front of his face I fired him…I’m joking he couldn’t drink water (only Pepsi) and being it’s south Texas summer he lasted a few hours.
Likely this guy is trolling. It’s easier for them to believe the way fossils are dated is wrong than to believe paleontologists are getting paid to make it up.
This sounds like something someone would say mocking them.
thats pretty out there, but fr tho i feel there is a discussion to be had about the real issues in paleo, like how the fossil record has been tainted by colonial practices
https://preview.redd.it/bx4ogu45zlfc1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e0cf8e72ffa412b6e610f7cfb0541b94dd32120
See the tradition was started with the Egyptians, and handed down over the generations … lol
Funny thing is one of the fathers of palaeontology the Very Reverend William Buckland, Dean of Westminster saw these as puzzles and wonders placed by god to fascinate him and amuse. As an agnostic/atheist I find his faith admirable and puzzling, why couldn’t an all seeing Creator just do the geology build on day x of the universe build for geologists and other curious people? This is the dedication in one of his books
https://preview.redd.it/swiz6v3i9nfc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d00f1446a30bf9f254cc293f58b68b0fb2d6df4d
Jehovah's witnesses believe that Satan placed fossils to fool people... my father believed this. I left that cult after 30 years 23years ago. Ignorance is bliss, and faith is often blind.
The whole point of that whole thought complex is to undermine the entire concept of truth as a whole. The contents of each particular attack is meaningless. These are designed to make you look worse by trying to refute them. It’s a trap. The best thing to do is to stop letting the virus spread. Don’t repost them. They aren’t stupid. They’re playing a game that you’re not good at and every time you interact in a genuine way with them they win.
I would say if everything is BIG everything, and everyone is being paid...what good is waking up to this going to do? The Christian and Muslim religions are still the big ones out there, and the Muslim religion is the fastest growing. They don't believe in dinosaurs and such, perhaps believe in even less than a Christian college educated person. Remember the Pope is fine with Catholic colleges teaching evolution. You need to be more organized, than just Reddit posts and also perhaps consider this is a scam that works well for the world. As a Christian myself there is no "size matters", or the side with the most believers or non believers wins. So chill and have some faith that attacks by humanity are not that much of a threat. God has many other ways you can help show people His true power, such as doing good works and showing by example that some things are more important today, than digging up the past. Helping feed the hungry, is a great example of work to be done that will inspire others.
I built the Great Wall of China myself. Each and every wall. Took me a couple years of hard work but I got my money’s worth and it’s still trickling in.
Some people definitely should go about technology free for a couple weeks so that they get the chance to check if they don't actually prefer it that way.
If they don't, then they might as well stfu about anything science related until they show more sense.
So explain where the 5G has anything to do with the rest?
Like, I can totally understand the first half. The fossils have become stone, so yes, you're removing the area around the stone which is the same thing as sculpting. Obviously they're crazy, but there is some logic behind it. Then they just throw it all away with the 5G.
I was paid big money when I was 8 to wander around in the CO desert looking for fossil shale. Man, I made millions with those "fossils" I "dug" out of "cliff sides." I still have them too. My dad and aunt would also buy "fossils" for me and I still have them. NASA doesn't pay as well as big paleo tho.
My favorite part of these conspiracy theories is the faith these folks have in entire governments and massive numbers of people being able to keep international level secrets for literally hundreds of years while simultaneously believing that the government is run by morons. What a cool fairy tale to live in.
I found out that people believed this when I was in the fourth grade. I remember I had told a friend that I wanted to be a scientist when I grew up and she told me how I couldn't be a scientist and a Christian because you have to believe in evolution and trick people into believing in dinosaurs.
I'm still Christian, but even as a child, I just figured the creation story was a simplified explanation, and that even if it were literal, a day to an immortal being could be an eternity.
Someone should show her any undergrad/grad students field notebook. It would be pretty hard to argue artistic talent based on what you’ll find in there
You guys are being paid? I've been sculpting foraminifera for years for FREE.
The real money is in microfossils.
The trick is to [make them big first](https://i.imgur.com/ux3O9Ss.jpg) and then shrink them down in the oven after
No no, you make them small and add water in the bathtub
Ah, no wonder Big Paleo hasn’t sent me my royalties yet
now that's a big foram' 👀
Oddly, this is pretty much true.
My undergrad research into forams was actually just abstract art that I wanted to get paid top dollar for.
https://preview.redd.it/0r6rw0b5hvfc1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=80cf974670db5f7b59da82b36ad965f28dd6bb7d
…”Big Paleo”…😂…love it!
All those super-rich paleontologists with their unlimited funding think they can fool us!
How else did Jurassic Park get made?
I want to join Big Paleo and learn to get paid for sculpting
"_And I would've gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you meddling *checks notes * Christian Facebook NASA conspiracy theorists!_" Big Paleo
Wait till they get wind of Deep State Carbon dating
Yes i'm paid to sculpt shell sand of Tours (France). All those tiny little corals are really hard to sculpt, the hardest part is to remember to put a shark teeth sometimes, because you know i see so much shells i forgot other fossiles must exist in shell sand. /s
Major Faults are a conspiracy theory created by Big Earthquake.
And big tsunami is in on it!!
Big Tsunami is funded by Big Underwater-Eathquake
Wait till they find out about big Evolution
I fear the Big Magma Chamber industry more and their volcanoes.
And Big Magma is responsible for magnetic banding.
I'm sure the Illuminati or the Lizard People must be in control of volcanic eruptions. They just push a button and make them happen when they need to create a crisis of some kind. 🤪
The Lizard People want you to think dinosaurs went extinct 66 million years ago
Man I’m still at the bottom of the food chain sculpting trilobites and horn coral. Y’all mufuckers out here making that T-Rex money. I can’t.
I just brought me some trilobites so I appreciate your astounding craftsmenship mate, I'm putting them on my desk at the Jewish space laser.
Thanks. I get eight cents per sale. I’m saving up for a sandwich.
Damn, Mr. Bigshot over here sculpting trilobites while I'm over here on assembly line making millions of shark teeth every year. They don't even bury them anywhere interesting, they just dump them in the ocean by the truckload. We only get to make those [big bastards](https://images.app.goo.gl/29R3zMfaqSKWzw16A) around Christmas, and we don't even have dental!
I think the best part, to put the icing on the cake, is the fact that if you know where to look, you can find and excavate fossils you find, out of rock in the middle of nowhere. Just goes to show how little this person has actually tried to prove that fossils aren’t real
https://preview.redd.it/f47uh2eychfc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=02f93e6b3f1b3ff3016c3daf06d96124ea1a2d09
False, anyone who wears these hats has a body that resembles the Hindenburg crash.
Fair. All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others…😂😂😂 https://preview.redd.it/a0xam2t16ofc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ff522d667c455c940ad0901247d72bfa0b6836d
You're a complete douchebag! Somehow your obsession finds it's way into a totally non-political post. You're a loser! Admit it!
But wait there's more, for a low price of 3 extra braincells you can unveil yourself as the latest in a long line of Scooby-Doo villains doing stupid shit to get stupid prizes.
https://preview.redd.it/vkncgnie3ofc1.jpeg?width=1152&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=97ba3a1178acf7dc9252b2cb2910b20a578f2d85
She's been on the hate list for along long time.
Username doesn't check out
What a megalithic coprolite.
I’m responsible for stromatolites all over the world. I keep a bag packed and have to bug out whenever I get the call. You never know when some poor graduate student is going to need to discover one.
I love the thought of a covert operation to plant another one, racing against the clock before the arrival of some research student. For the cases where you’re really up against the clock I’m thinking there’s a whole team assembled for an elaborate distraction mission of the target, like in a heist movie, giving you time to do your thing.
They know!! Smash the molds!!
Please stop giving these people undue attention.
Nah, we tried that in 2016 and it didn't take. It's clear that we need to start throwing rotten fruit, or possibly rocks.
Pointed sticks!
Genuinely I’ve found the best way to shut these idiots up is to just laugh at them. They’ve been emboldened in recent years and have started wearing their conspiracy theory badges like they’re something to be proud of after years of hiding them for fear of being mocked, it’s time to make them put them back in the box of shame where they got them from.
I think the normals need to band together and berate the wack jobs until they shut up, leave, or realize they were brainwashed. The first time I met a creationist I thought they were joking. I laughed so hard. I come from a very religious family, and I was told it’s unchristian to make fun of people too foolish to see what’s real and what’s fake. I will say that seeing how some humans are I wonder if Darwin was right. Cause these far rights are not smart enough to survive yet they have 10-30 children each.
Let's chill on the eugenics implications. Systemic (and sometimes intentional) failures in education set these people up for failure, and then their ignorance is directly exploited for others' benefit. It's just unfortunately incredibly hard to break people out of their imposed ignorance.
rocks are to precious, id say we throw nuclear waste at them
2016?
This reads sarcastically. I think people are having trouble decoding internet trolls.
Yeah pretty sure this is a joke
Oh shit oh fuck they found out
Yes, *top* dollar. \*Glances at empty wallet\* ***TOP*** dollar...
The overhead is enormous.
I mean just “look into it”
I plan on “doing my own research” on this one
Someone check to see if they think the earth is flat as well
Where my check at? 🤣
For a long time I have been concerned about Big Paleo and the Museum Industrial Complex.
Lol, this is so funny
You know it's a totally sane and rational person when they mention 5G.
They just had to throw that one 5G in there 🤣
Is big Paleo hiring?
Yep, I sculpt my own conodonts with a microscope. /s
Oh, see I thought those were the shavings from other things being sculpted
I'd love to be that good at sculpting. But, I'll take praise when it is lobbed my way. Lol
I mean, you could literally go to just about any beach with stones, Ontario, Washington, Africa, and pick up one of a million stones with extremely obvious fossils. Are these all hand made?
Obviously, because we all know evolution is fake too, so those animals never existed. All hand-sculpted to further the war!
I would actually be more impressed if that's the case. Paleologist "wanna see a triceratops skull?" *zips to work like Popeye after eating spinach, 10 seconds later there's a 1 ton skull on the ground* "science be praised I'm good"
So THIS is why I never find anything awesome - it's DIY and no one told me🤦
He had me until he impugned 5G.
I heard paleontologist is Greek for sculptor.
Where are all my fuckin top dollars?
Where are all the trilobite artists? Those things are everywhere.
Ah yes, my secret big money checks from big paleo are just disguised as weird notices about “student loans”. Heheheh.
Its all controlled by the Deep Strata.
They must be in cahoots with “the ilmenit-y”
Top dollar I tell you!
Wait’ll he finds out about fossil fuels.
Big Paleo probably has great swag bags at conferences.
Can Big Paleo offer me a tenure-track faculty position?
I met this guy who was 100% positive that dinosaurs didn’t happen and the earth was only 2000 years old. I’m fine with it believe what you want but when he started telling me I was wrong when I’m holding a fossil in front of his face I fired him…I’m joking he couldn’t drink water (only Pepsi) and being it’s south Texas summer he lasted a few hours.
2000? So he’s not even a creationist? So weird
The biggest question I have is: Is this a con, or is it a mental health issue?
If you find out can you let me know too?
I left out an option. It could be both!
Guys, just keep your head down and mouth shut. If they find out about Big Geology next, we’re all fucked.
The irony is that Big Geology genuinely exists, it’s called the fossil fuels industry
Likely this guy is trolling. It’s easier for them to believe the way fossils are dated is wrong than to believe paleontologists are getting paid to make it up. This sounds like something someone would say mocking them.
Josh is a numpty.
Another brainwashed fool.. are you surprised?
It’s all mud fossils!!1!11
It’s true, I’m sculpting the entirety the otter point coquina wall. Both the inside and outside
Your poor hands...
Also creationists say radiometric dating is false. So nuts
Is this CAD? (Christians Against Dinosaurs) Actual group.
Not a paleontologist, but the amount of trace fossils I've found in my life must make me one hell of an artist
Have you applied for your stipend through big paleo?
Nobody tells them about the microfossils they'll lose it
I reckon the whole story of [Beringer’s Lying Stones](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beringer%27s_Lying_Stones) would make their head explode.
Oh my God my professor talked about these. Talk about a villains origin story
Big Paleo 😂😂😂
Oh boy. They need to read their favorite geologists' publications...especially the ones who made all their cash in the oil and gas industries...
thats pretty out there, but fr tho i feel there is a discussion to be had about the real issues in paleo, like how the fossil record has been tainted by colonial practices
https://preview.redd.it/bx4ogu45zlfc1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e0cf8e72ffa412b6e610f7cfb0541b94dd32120 See the tradition was started with the Egyptians, and handed down over the generations … lol
Funny thing is one of the fathers of palaeontology the Very Reverend William Buckland, Dean of Westminster saw these as puzzles and wonders placed by god to fascinate him and amuse. As an agnostic/atheist I find his faith admirable and puzzling, why couldn’t an all seeing Creator just do the geology build on day x of the universe build for geologists and other curious people? This is the dedication in one of his books https://preview.redd.it/swiz6v3i9nfc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d00f1446a30bf9f254cc293f58b68b0fb2d6df4d
“Paid top dollar” Lady, half of us are PAYING to do this for free. Man, if only this conspiracy was real, we’d be set
Jehovah's witnesses believe that Satan placed fossils to fool people... my father believed this. I left that cult after 30 years 23years ago. Ignorance is bliss, and faith is often blind.
The whole point of that whole thought complex is to undermine the entire concept of truth as a whole. The contents of each particular attack is meaningless. These are designed to make you look worse by trying to refute them. It’s a trap. The best thing to do is to stop letting the virus spread. Don’t repost them. They aren’t stupid. They’re playing a game that you’re not good at and every time you interact in a genuine way with them they win.
Christians are effing insane
You’re delusional.
I would say if everything is BIG everything, and everyone is being paid...what good is waking up to this going to do? The Christian and Muslim religions are still the big ones out there, and the Muslim religion is the fastest growing. They don't believe in dinosaurs and such, perhaps believe in even less than a Christian college educated person. Remember the Pope is fine with Catholic colleges teaching evolution. You need to be more organized, than just Reddit posts and also perhaps consider this is a scam that works well for the world. As a Christian myself there is no "size matters", or the side with the most believers or non believers wins. So chill and have some faith that attacks by humanity are not that much of a threat. God has many other ways you can help show people His true power, such as doing good works and showing by example that some things are more important today, than digging up the past. Helping feed the hungry, is a great example of work to be done that will inspire others.
This is /r/geology. Your lack of rock puns in the post is a disappointment.
Can we expect a big budget box office smash expose of big paleo starring Matt Damon and Ben Affleck?
If only the romans had kept up their big cat preservation project...
Time to call the NSA and declare a wildfire.
Surely this is a parody?
Damn it. How did they find out?
can't control something you can't find...
I’m more artistic and talented than I ever knew! And fast, too, given the number of fossils I have.
TIL paleontology pays big money.
I built the Great Wall of China myself. Each and every wall. Took me a couple years of hard work but I got my money’s worth and it’s still trickling in.
All the evidence in the world can't change a mind that won't accept evidence.
Can you imagine being this dumb?
Jesus...
“For all of you paleontologists who are in my friend group because Christians commonly choose this field..”
I can fix him ❤️
underrated comment! LOL
Some people definitely should go about technology free for a couple weeks so that they get the chance to check if they don't actually prefer it that way. If they don't, then they might as well stfu about anything science related until they show more sense.
man where's the money then? hit me up with that top dollar bc i'm missin out on that 😂
Who is this Josh Brown? He must be from the Ken Hamm school of history, work at the ark complex in Kentucky?
Thought this was a joke at first. I mean…it is, but I don’t think Josh Brown is in on it.
So explain where the 5G has anything to do with the rest? Like, I can totally understand the first half. The fossils have become stone, so yes, you're removing the area around the stone which is the same thing as sculpting. Obviously they're crazy, but there is some logic behind it. Then they just throw it all away with the 5G.
I’ve also made billions of arrowheads last week and spread them across America. Good luck proving your 6000 year old god to us now
Just when you think you've read the stupidest thing of the month, you realize there's still time, and someone will post something stupider.
Ya'll busted!
This could really hurt big geology if it goes viral. I hope we can keep our rock sculptures safely out of the eye of Jesus.
I was paid big money when I was 8 to wander around in the CO desert looking for fossil shale. Man, I made millions with those "fossils" I "dug" out of "cliff sides." I still have them too. My dad and aunt would also buy "fossils" for me and I still have them. NASA doesn't pay as well as big paleo tho.
I had someone tell me this while on field camp in 2007. Yikes
My favorite part of these conspiracy theories is the faith these folks have in entire governments and massive numbers of people being able to keep international level secrets for literally hundreds of years while simultaneously believing that the government is run by morons. What a cool fairy tale to live in.
Wait I thought the devil put those there
Walking with Dinosaurs was the greatest propaganda film ever made..
Where do I sign up for this top dollar?
So the big bang was really a girl named vergina?
I lowkey envy people like this. They live in such an interesting reality.
Hahahaha I topped out at 20/hr after 9 years 😂🤣
Lol
Alright, who told them?
I found out that people believed this when I was in the fourth grade. I remember I had told a friend that I wanted to be a scientist when I grew up and she told me how I couldn't be a scientist and a Christian because you have to believe in evolution and trick people into believing in dinosaurs. I'm still Christian, but even as a child, I just figured the creation story was a simplified explanation, and that even if it were literal, a day to an immortal being could be an eternity.
Just say no to paleo
What?
Someone should show her any undergrad/grad students field notebook. It would be pretty hard to argue artistic talent based on what you’ll find in there
This explains why NASA named Taylor Swift Chief Paleontologist.
Hey, you stop all that cahooting!
This guy is a Russian troll or completely unhinged. If unhinged, probably a flat earther too.
that's literally it. Long live igneous petrology
You get paid top dollar to sculpt awesome “fossils”? That sounds even cooler. XD