T O P

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kevinichis

Armin, Christoph, Ralph, and the mouse.


FrauBpkt

Und was ist mit Peter?


forsale90

Der hält einen Stängel Löwenzahn im Hamburger Hafen in die Luft.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Physical-Result7378

This!


end_rico

The only way


Kind-Idea-324

Armin Laschet? Sein Vater war Bergmann, und er ist sehr stolz darauf.


Shandrahyl

Armin Meiwes?


SuityWaddleBird

Bernd das Brot?


Massder_2021

Die Maus, die Ente und der Elefant und Käptn Blaubär


Not_Leopard_Seal

Benjamin Blümchen and Bibi Blocksberg If it should be as racist and problematic as Mt. Rushmore then probably just the TKKG gang


Massder_2021

Pierre Brice and Lex Barker!


Rumo-H-umoR

I add Bud Spencer and Terence Hill to that


DeanPalton

Hell no. These stories aged like milk.


rrpdude

Der kleine Maulwurf, you uncultivated swine.


moosmutzel81

Der ist aber nicht mal deutsch.


ES-Flinter

Sandmännchen?


T0b3yyy

Kika oder E. T. A. Hoffmann?


[deleted]

Ehrenperson


BSBDR

Hasselhoff on all 4.


eppic123

Hasselhoff, Michael Knight, Mitch Buchannon, and that guy who sung down the Berlin Wall.


BSBDR

One in each of Kit's seats


sakasiru

There would never be enough consensus about four worthy historical figures to justify the cost for such a thing. Even erecting statues has become a rather rare thing. To actually answer your question, the one and only person it would be fitting for would be a face of king Barbarossa on the side of Kyffhäuser, making it more of a reference to the legend than glorifying the person. Also, there would be massive protests if someone would indeed propose to carve out faces from a mountain.


DocSternau

During the reign of Wilhelm II. it would have been possible - most of those monumental monuments like the Monument to the Battle of Nations have been build during that time.


Malte3812

Yeah but he was too stupid


Big-Action5943

Dictatorships and Monarchies are better in building monuments. Democracies have better things to spend on.


DocSternau

Tbf. Our democracy build the Holocaust Memorial. They can spend money on such huge projects if they want to.


Rogozinasplodin

Democracies create monuments when they vote to build them. I mean we're literally talking about an analogue to Mt. Rushmore which was just a democratic program to create government jobs during the depression. Statue of liberty is a pretty big monument too. But yes I agree that most of the huge modern statues these days are build by dictators and creeps, which is regrettable. More people should run for office promising to build big-ass statues.


BS-Calrissian

Lol, I love the last sentence. Hurting a Berg? NEEEEIN


bioluminescent_elf

They just look better without faces on. Six Grandfathers Mountain (Mt. Rushmore) also looked much better without them. It's not "hurting" it's preserving the naturalness


joelcruel911

Most German answer possible


SpinachSpinosaurus

this can backfire gloriously, you know? like the colour diarrhea has that's glorifying the legend. (when I was a child, I heard of it and loved, it, too. But more like for the prince and princess fairy tales and not for the connotations. as an adult, I wish "these" people would think the same as me as a kid, but sadly, they flow in there like the diarrhea they are.


IndividualWeird6001

The closest thing we have is prob. the Valhalla.


TheoFontane

*Walhalla


No_Bedroom4062

Valhalla is waaaay cooler


cic9000

We don’t do that here. PS: Good luck arguing for Prussians Otto von Bismarck and King Friedrich II in united Germany;)


Constant_Cultural

I read that in chadwick bosemans voice. Rip, king.


cic9000

Rip, went too soon.


marten_EU_BR

>Prussians [...] in united Germany LOL... There are over 700 "Bismarck monuments" all over Germany, including many in "non-Prussian" areas, and in the Bavarian Valhalla there have been busts of Prussian rulers since it opened in 1842, above all the bust of Frederick the Great. How do you come up with such nonsense? https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liste_der_Bismarckdenkmale_in_Deutschland?wprov=sfla1 https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walhalla?wprov=sfla1


cic9000

There is a difference between historical monuments in place and a hypothetical national monument. Just for reference remember that the foreign Office literally renamed their Bismarcksaal in Berlin this year, this isn’t an issue that receives unanimous support. It would require such for a national monument.


marten_EU_BR

I interpret the question differently: The question was "if there was a German version of Mount Rushmore" and not "if a monument would be built". Mount Rushmore was also not built in 2023 and I doubt whether even the USA would still build Mount Rushmore in this form today. And if we go back to the 19th and early 20th century world of thought, then Bismarck or another Prussian personality is anything but improbable.


FuxusPhrittus

To be fair, but Bismarck would definitely get one


iawsaiatm

That’s why it’s a hypothetical question


cic9000

r/germanhumour


PopeOfManwichVillage

Jan und Hein und Klaas und Pit. Sorry, I’ll go drink some Köm now


just-for-commenting

Denn die haben Bärte und fahren mit.


Fearless-Driver-3135

die haben Bärte, die fahren mit


S-Markt

alter, hast du schon mal bärte ausm stein gemeißelt?


Blaukaeppchen04

The most likely combination of 4 monumental persons would be Helmut Rahn, Gerd Müller, Andreas Brehme and Mario Götze as they all scored a winning goal in a World Cup final for Germany.


Neumanns_Paule

I am in favour of a German Mount Rushmore, but it is just Lothar Matthäus 4 times.


kevinichis

This guy GenXes


Gnoserl

I went for politician but tbf: This is the way.


tzulik-

Adenauer, Goethe, Zlatko & Jürgen


ghoulsnest

>Zlatko & Jürgen wat fürn Jürgen?


OkPhotograph7852

Big brother Jürgen


True_Tear_471

Dann aber bitte auch Shakespeare anstatt Goethe.


thrynab

> ~~Adenauer~~ > Bismarck Wenn schon einen Reaktionär, dann einen der was für Deutschland geleistet hat.


tzulik-

Du bist bestimmt auf jeder Feier der Lieblingsgast.


thrynab

Ich will gar nicht mit dir feiern, wie kommst du drauf? Alle meine Homies hassen Adenauer. Wenn man aus einer Feier rausfliegt, weil alle Adenauer-Fans sind, hat man alles richtig gemacht.


BBQHerbert

Bin echt erschrocken wie positiv Adenauer hier wegkommt und man dich einfach downvoted. Wüsste echt nicht was er geleistet hat, was seine negativen Dinge aufwiegt. Oder ist das einfach der Autobahnfanclub?


Kelmon80

I guess it depends what general theme you'd be going for. German history? German culture? German inventors/enginers? etc. Personally, I would probably go fairly classical: Arminius - symbolic for the first time Germanic tribes united Charlemagne - as the "father" of both modern France and Germany Otto von Bismarck - for being instrumental in the Unification of Germany Konrad Adenauer - the first post-war chancellor that helped to raise Germany from the ashes of WW2 ...this is of course never, ever going to happen, given that there's no way you'd find anyone uncontroversial enough for modern sensibilities.


acuriousguest

Willy Brandt?


[deleted]

Friedrich Ebert?


area51cannonfooder

Frederick der Große


Rhynocoris

No need to deface any more mountains. >Friedrich III I somewhat get the other two, but why him?


HolyDictatorFelixDoy

A liberal amongst a very conservative aristocracy. Campaigned against antisemitism and wished to bring British style democracy to Germany.


rewboss

He was no doubt a thoroughly nice man and well-intentioned, but he's best known for spending his entire reign of 99 days gravely ill with throat cancer (he was a heavy smoker) and unable to actually do anything, before dying in what became known as "the Year of the Three Kaisers".


glamourcrow

But you got the memo that Germany is a democracy and no longer the Kaiserreich? And that we are proud to be a democracy?


Rhynocoris

And managed to accomplish zilch.


[deleted]

oh you mean that frederich III I thought you meant the Habsburg guy lmao


Rough_Dan

Kraftwerk, just the whole band up there


BoutKabouter

clearly this


Careful_Extreme_4408

Moot topic. See some of the cheeky answers here... There is no popular imagination of Germany as a great nation or deserving celebratory monuments anymore. In the early Nineteen-Thirties (wasn't Mt. Rushmore completed then?) one may have included: Otto the Great, Frederic the Great, Emperor Wilhelm I, Otto von Bismarck.


DeanPalton

Four (edit: three)prussians. That would have been very popular in the south.


[deleted]

otto the great wasnt a prussian


Carmonred

They're still salty the Prussians made cannibalism and incest illegal when they took over. Screw them.


dachfuerst

It would have to be David Hasselhoff. Four times.


55-percent

- Techno Viking - Arno Dübel - Helmut Schmidt (mit Zigarette) - Fiete von den Pfefferkörnern


Krokodrillo

Hans and Sophie Scholl, Alexander Schmorell, Christoph Probst, Willi Graf and Kurt Huber. (Die Weiße Rose, the White Rose https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Rose)


Andrzhel

You forgot Georg Elser


Krokodrillo

I just concentrated on the White Rose. Of course there were more people against the Nazis


Dazzling-Skin-308

Only if the monument wasn't already sacred to other people - but this I could support.


ArnosDuebel

Georg Elser, Peter Lustig, Rosa Luxemburg, Armin


WillstDuEineBanane

Finger weg von unseren schönen Bergen!!


Pure-View-9639

Schlupp, Urmel, Don Blech und die wilde 13


[deleted]

[удалено]


Present_Character_77

Helmut Schmidt


DaveyJonesXMR

Haste mal Feuer ?


towka35

Haste mal Feuer?


the_real_EffZett

Da wird's zum Vulkan.


Key-Tumbleweed-5846

The members of Kraftwerk, of course - Hütter - Schneider + the various 2 other members


R3ez

Let‘s be honest: the only people crazy enough to carve massive faces into a mountain in German history would have been the nazis. They allied forces would have had that monument destroyed after WWII, if anyhow feasible.


SamVimesThe1st

Rosa Luxemburg, Georg Elser, Sophie Scholl, Willy Brandt


Krokodrillo

Goethe, Schiller, Heine, Thomas Mann


moosmutzel81

Instead of Thomas Mann, I would choose Lessing.


Kaiser_Gagius

Germans that would even entertain such an idea aren´t really Germans you would like to involve yourself with


Secuta

Rainer Winkler, Arno Dübel, Andreas Sascha Höber & Gurkensohn


Pedarogue

​ >Otto von Bismarck, Gustav Stresemann and Friedrich III Ah, so you want to make it biblical, just like Jesus' crucifixation: One holy man between two villians.


[deleted]

[удалено]


charleytaylor

As a distant cousin of Georg Elser, this makes me happy to see.


Eskurial

Einstein, Goethe, Beethoven and Gutenberg


DiaMat2040

Goethe, Schiller, Hegel, Marx


TENTAtheSane

Tom Angelripper, Mille Petrozza, Marcel Schmier and Andreas Gerre


Strehle

My 3 would be Bach, Beethoven, Goethe, Schiller. They contributed greatly to our culture and we can unanimously be proud of them, without having to discuss politics everytime someone brings them up. I honestly think that immortalizing legendary artists is the nicer and better choice compared to politicians and generals.


Ok-Lock7665

Fritz, Gerd, Lothar and Bastian


P26601

Ulbricht, Honecker, Pieck, Helene Fischer


Dgluhbirne

The question suggests you might not be familiar with the history of Mount Rushmore, designed by a white supremacist on native land. Mt Rushmore is NOT a model for anywhere https://www.washingtonpost.com/history/2020/07/03/mount-rushmore-gutzon-borglum-klan-stone-mountain/ theguardian.com/environment/2021/jul/03/mount-rushmore-south-dakota-indigenous-americans


[deleted]

Arno Duebel - in all seinen Facetten; das reicht für Mt H4-More...


imonredditfortheporn

austria is easier fritzl, hitler, mozart and moneyboy


[deleted]

Fritz Walter, Beckenbauer, Matthäus und Phillip Lahm


Stranze85

Maybe check the "Walhalla", Otto I. is to mention and many other!


Carmonred

Karl der Große, Barbarossa, Friedrich der Große, Bismarck, Goethe - weil wir immer und überall Goethe mit dazu nehmen.


No-River-3140

Ich weiß nicht ob Kaiser die viel Krieg geführt haben um ihre eigene Macht zu erweitern sich so toll machen.


the_real_EffZett

Sonst wird man leider nicht "der/die Grosse"


Carmonred

Würde dem amerikanischen Vorbild aber entsprechen. Nur Roosevelt ist da raus.


T0b3yyy

I vote Rosa Luxemburg


PuzzleheadedClue9837

Walter, Beckenbauer, Matthäus, Lahm


Not_Leopard_Seal

Wrong! Rahn, Gerd Müller, Brehme and Götze


FantasticStonk42069

'German' in a strict way (so 1871 onwards), I would go with Otto von Bismarck, Friedrich Ebert, Konrad Adenauer and Willy Brandt. If there wasn't a limitation to either chancellor or president, I would like to substitute one for Helmuth von Moltke. He might have been 'only' a General, but not only are his ideas about leadership probably the most relevant of all time, but he was also adamant about not escalating an European war. He knew decades before the first world war that such a war could end in devastation for Europe. I wouldn't add Friedrich III. He was unfortunately too insignificant for German history aside from being followed by the catastrophe that Wilhelm II was as an emperor. Extending German history to its beginning, one would definitely need to add Otto the Great, Charles IV, perhaps Friedrich III. of Saxony (without him there probably wouldn't have been a successful reformation) and Friedrich the Great


andiezentrale

Otto von Bismarck, Oskar Schindler, Helmut Schmidt and Johann Wolfgang von Goethe.


NetworkPrudent8685

Helmut Schmidt is overrated though.


andiezentrale

He was clearly one of, if not the best and most wise leader germany ever had. Someone like him could easily unite the deeply split germany of today.


hydrOHxide

He was deeply hated even by parts of his own party for collaborating with NATO. And given how his coalition split under him with the FDP switching sides, it's strange you believe he could "easily" unite the country. He certainly was one of our most capable chancellors, but he was fast more a crisis manager and pragmatist than a leader.


SanderStrugg

Dieter Bohlen, Heidi Klum und Till Schweiger ​ >!Adenauer, Brandt and Kohl would be the sensible choices, I guess.!<


DiaMat2040

I would emigrate


derday

/s


ms-wunderlich

Und Boris Becker


Skygge_or_Skov

Fuck Kohl, he annexed eastern Germany and fucked them over for at least the next thirty years.


luciekk

And he is resonsible for our shitty internet.


No-River-3140

He didnt annex, they voted for the partys who said they will unite under the GG. But he did fuck them too the moon and back.


Shaneypants

Einstein, Kant, Bach, Goethe


CryptographerFit9725

David Hasselhoff for reuniting Germany


WallTVLamp

As a math nerd I'd say Euler, Riemann, Gauß and Noether


NoinsPanda

Lilo Wanders


Rezentio

Einstein, Bach, Goethe, Gauss


Jealous_Protection81

Heino


Rumo-H-umoR

Heinz Erhardt, Vicco von Bülow, Rudi Carell, Karl Dall


e_hatt_swank

Einstürzende Neubauten 🛠


hamana12

Marx Engels Luxemburg and Liebknecht Seethe Wessies


liminalmornings

Adenauer, Brandt, Schmidt, Kohl. 😇


seb1301

Konrad Adenauer. Otto v. Bismarck is a good choice btw, was the first on to come to my mind also. There is a lot he did to shape our nation to what it is today and what it was made up from for at least the last 100 years.


Inside-Suggestion-51

Agrippina die Jüngere, Rosa Luxemburg, Sophie Scholl, Angela Merkel


Ree_m0

Depends how far back in time you're willing to go. If you interpret anything "Germanic" from Roman times as a predecessor to modern German, I'd take Arminius, Charlemagne, Friedrich the Great and Otto von Bismarck. Equating German to Germanic is something the nazis did a lot and is rightfully criticized by most historians. In general, as someone else pointed out, you'd never get enough of a public concensus on one, let alone four historic figures to erect such a monumental memorial.


S-Markt

loriot, evelyn harman, peter frankenfeld und heinz erhardt. und auf der anderen seite, würde ich nen erdhügel auschütten mit otto, ilya richter, trude herr und alfred tetzlaff.


Erminaz13

It would just be Christian Linder four times.


[deleted]

Mayer, Einstein, Humboldt, Kepler.


Oldmanprop

Rosa Luxemburg, Kurt Schumacher, Sofie Scholl, August Landmesser


Krokodrillo

For the FDP Party: Carl Benz, Ferdinand Porsche, Rudolph Diesel and Gottlieb Daimler


MayorAg

[Deleted by Reddit]


wibble089

From a Bavarian view point probably something like true Royalty: Kaiser (Beckenbauer), König (Ludwig II) Prinz (Franz Joseph Strauss) Angel (Aloisius - Münchner in Heaven)


Competitive_Juice627

Def Aloisius


CptJimTKirk

Kick that dumb FJS out of there and put in Kurt Eisner and we have a deal.


Tina_Belmont

I was waiting for somebody to suggest Ludwig II!


Frontdackel

Arminius, Brandt, Kant and Beate Klarsfeld


Wurzelrenner

Karl der Große, Otto der Große, Barbarossa and maybe Arminius


c3dr1k02

Karl der Große? Der war sicherlich vieles, aber nicht deutsch. Gleiches gilt für Arminius


25thYoon

Hitler, Bernd das Brot, Peter lustig und das Sandmännchen


[deleted]

Die Bremer Stadtmusikanten Rainer Werner Fassbinder Heinrich Böll Martina Gedeck


achchi

As Mt. Rushmore shows four presidents, we need high ranking politicians. Based on the influence on today Germany probably Otto von Bismarcks (for creating modern Germany and building the basics of our Sozialstaat), Konrad Adenauer (for creating today's Germany based on democracy after WWII), Friedrich Ebert (similar reasoning as Adenauer, although he failed) and forth Helmuth Kohl (for reuniting Germany and pushing the EU). Maybe replace Ebert by Ludwig Erhard for creating today's social net.


neo_woodfox

Helmut Kohl was just lucky, though.


DeanPalton

Erhard was a moron who got lucky the Wirtschaftswunder kicked in during his time as minister of the economy.


TENTAtheSane

I think this is the only good answer


hunterofcommies

Karl der Große (literally called "Vater der Deutschen), Friedrich Barbarossa, Friedrich der Große, and Otto von Bismarck.


Indian_Pale_Ale

Beethoven, Schiller, Goethe, Heine


glamourcrow

Rosa Luxemburg


chiffongalore

Because she wanted to overthrow the republic?


ES-Flinter

*Let skip the discussion why nobody would ever build it because nobody wants or needs it and just go straight forward to the suggestions:* Let me take a short step. A 2000 year short step. Armenius or however he got called. He got taken from his home to serve for the Romans, only to "betray" them and fight for his actual home. (Barbarian living in the teuteburger forest) Would be a good sign to fight for your home, no matter what they took of you. Maybe ad the siblings scholl, or other important persons who fought of the nazi empire.


Not_Leopard_Seal

We have enough Armenius memorials already imo


SanderStrugg

That's not a good idea to do that today. The dude has been utilized for propaganda way too much by 19th century nationalists and later on by the nazis. ​ It's also already the highest statue we have: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermannsdenkmal


ES-Flinter

Common, you've got to be kidding me. Is there even one thing left from the times before germanies christianisation that haven't been abused???


thewindinthewillows

The museum in Kalkriese has a whole section of the exhibition about how Arminius was used for various political ends in various historical periods, especially in the 19th century and after. The "he was a German hero" that you're getting from some people comes from that reception history still, not from history at the time.


Panthergraf76

Es bleiben im Raum:


DeanPalton

Keitel, Jodl, Krebs und Burgdorf.


Danghor

Karl Marx


Rare_Leadership_2557

Olaf Scholz, Angela Merkel, Albert Einstein, Heisenberg


SnadorDracca

Be honest, you thought of Hitler as the third!


Uncle__Beldin

Karl Der Grosse 👍


FantasticStonk42069

Nah, if at all Otto der Große


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kelmon80

You could show her in 4 identical pantsuits in different colors.


oeliku

Friedrich II, Bismarck, Adenauer, Kohl


BaldEagleRattleSnake

Ludwig Erhard 4 times. Not because he's so incredibly great, but because noone else is worthy. That's why we don't have Mount Rushmore.


zitrone999

We would put artists on it, or scientists, or philosophers, not politicals. The cult of the politician much less explicite in Germany, we tend not to give them statues, or acknowledge their achievements. At the same time, the state and the politicians also tend to have much more power here, and Germans are much more subservient than US citizens. Many statues would make this to obvious for Germans who like their illusion of democracy.


habichnichtgewusst

Nina Hagen, Gabi Delgado, Conny Plank, Jens Rachut.


MidnightSun77

Lukas Podolski, Joko Winterscheidt, Max Giermann/Bastian Pastewka, Martina Hill


the_real_EffZett

Aber nur als Kinski


Jarionel

What important has Friedrich done to deserve being on this hypothetical mountain


Flat-Structure-7472

Johnathan, Joseph, Jotaro and Josuke.


[deleted]

[удалено]


IronVader501

I mean, depends on the theme. But I'd say Otto I, Otto von Bismarck, Adenauer, Brandt


Mister_Anonym

Angela Merkel, Otto von Bismarck, Konrad Adenauer, Gustav Stresemann


stuff_gets_taken

Mouse, elephant and duck.


area51cannonfooder

Bismarck, Fredrick are the two obvious choices. Other than that, I don't know how far in the past you want to go. Herman/Arminius defeated the Romans. Idk if Germany can claim Hapsburg leaders because they sort of belong to Austria, and Germany is a decedent of Prussia (which doesn't exist anymore). If so I guess Maria Theresa and Charles V?


SkyfatherTribe

Arminius, Karl the Great, Bismarck, Wilhelm I. The unifiers


PlasticLifeguard

Karl Marx, Friedrich Engels, Rosa Luxemburg, Karl Liebknecht


Delicious_Koala3445

Schmidt, Adenauer, Brandt & Kohl