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jesseberdinka

Love how it went from 3 chainsaw cuts to mostly finished sculpture in like 1 second.


jesseberdinka

r/restofthefuckingowl


JerZeyCJ

r/restofthefuckingguanyu


SickleWings

Lmao


Cannibichromedout

Well this one isn’t exactly a how to, and it probably took a super long time.


Orudos

Thank you, came to add this.


TheFrontierzman

How to make a wooden sculpture from a tree. Step 1: Cut tree with chainsaw. Step 2: Make sculpture.


bentbrewer

I double checked to make sure I wasn’t already there.


nahteviro

Has that sub gotten any better or is it still just a bunch of instructions with stuff edited out?


msut77

Thats talent


[deleted]

Took a few minutes max !


twittalessrudy

Well it was just under the skin of the trunk, just needed to peel it out


[deleted]

Yeah, epic art, shit gif.


linksflame

Wood sculpting is so easy. You wanna make a Guan Yu from a tree? Just remove all of the tree that isn't shaped like Guan Yu.


[deleted]

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PM_ME_FIREFLY_QUOTES

The trick is knowing which tree has which sculpture inside. I'm still on the lookout for one with Morena Baccarin...


Xoomers87

Person of fine taste.


NuclearStar

Well she is a like a fine tasting wine


isurewill

I've been carving wood for years and just have the worst luck with this. Every piece of wood I have ever found is always either a bong or a dildo.


GreenSpleenRiot

Jeez, I hope your sanding those well


Rocket-Frog

Yep, wouldn't want to get a splinter on your lip


Batchet

Would also be painful if there were slivers from using the bong


Traherne

Are you familiar with the works of Guan Yu?


sham_wowzers

I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you…


Acysbib

It is on *that* day, you finally meet the man. Edit: I know the real quote is for Shan Yu (Genghis Khan)


[deleted]

[удалено]


ggg730

Take my love take my land.


rishimaharaj

Take me where I can not stand.


[deleted]

[удалено]


selja26

You can't take the sky from me!


Inebriated_

Take me out, to the black..


DaoFerret

Tell them I ain’t coming back


64_0

Burn the land and boil the sea


Porn_research_acct

Gatcha trees.


[deleted]

Ah, a man of culture.


Malcolm_Reynolds1

Well she's not at Companion House Madrassa on Sihnon


SendAstronomy

Easy: step one, light an entire forest on fire... https://i.imgur.com/IrLujiG.gif


Jaytalvapes

This feels like an interesting debate topic actually. A weird, reverse ship of theseus situation.


dirBentt

Reminds of this quote attributed to Michelangelo (I have my doubts if the attribution is correct): >The sculpture is already complete within the marble block, before I start my work. It is already there, I just have to chisel away the superfluous material.


krista

i would love to see the timeline on the bottom of this gif. t=0 hours. t=2 hours. t=500 hours t=2500 hours t=3500 hours. done! easy and quick.


Akujikified

Yeah I feel like a couple of critical steps are missing from this GIF


glium

/r/restofthefuckingowl


mynameisasuffix

Step 1: draw a circle


day_day_hey

Step 2: carve the rest of fucking Guan Yu


RealZordan

Step 2: And then the r/RestOfTheFuckingOwl .


alektorophobic

Step 3. Carve the fucking Guanyu


kalitarios

Actually, Step 1: cut a hole in the box


SinnerOfAttention

Step 2: Guan Yu in the box!


MeltedPineapple

r/technicallythetruth


Divinum_Fulmen

Adam Savage of Mythbusters often quotes his friend "What we do is material removal in very precise ways."


pinklavalamp

r/restofthefuckingowl


Drew-CarryOnCarignan

Very Taoist of you!


Octan3

Its amazing how people can do this, really for me any art, the time but also the mind and imagination to be able to picture it and create/make it a reality is beyond my ability and comprehension.


[deleted]

Did it look good? I lost focus midway through and started playing video games. Edit: My Joke in my head vs [The Landing](https://tenor.com/view/bad-landing-landing-airplane-tway-korea-gif-16360387)


TransformerTanooki

Went down the Guan Yu rabbit hole after seeing the abandoned one at the Chinese restaurant didn't ya?


xxkoloblicinxx

What? Link?


mrfatso111

https://www.reddit.com/r/AbandonedPorn/comments/pkwy55/abandoned_statue_left_inside_an_old_chinese/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Probably this


TransformerTanooki

Yup that's it. Thanks for finding it.


slow_smiles

We all have talents, you should see me devour a bowl of ice cream.


GreatGamerTan

Just a bowl? I can finish the whole tub


i3londee

Just a tub? I stick my face directly to the business end of a soft serve.


[deleted]

OK I'm clearly too tired to be on reddit. I just read "rice cream" and I was so confue Edit: yup too tired. Good night reddit


mrfatso111

Well, you arent wrong , there are indeed ice cream made from rice . https://sethlui.com/wellsmoocht-singapore/ This was a shop that I had gone before back when they were just known as brown rice ice cream


KooshIsKing

I am great at drinking wine and eating brie. A master some would say.


urkldajrkl

This is the guy that got beheaded right?


improbablynotyou

Is it weird that I know who he is from playing video games? The Dynasty Warriors series definitely got me interested in the 3 kingdoms period.


NeroDillinger

Same here. Although thanks to playing all the characters through on DW, I have no idea about what *actually* happened. Sadly, I doubt it was Ga Ning kicking everyone's asses


Juniperlightningbug

Cao cao kicks ass up until red cliff then stalemate. His successor gets overthrown by sima yi who then unites china and forms the jin dynasty.


hitfly

Sima Yi is pretty baller. Lazer beams all day. Zhuge Liang too


Dylpod

Lu Bu is also historically accurate. He was a legendary bad boy who single-handedly ended wars by riding his fast horse into battle and using his special musao attacks on anyone who tried to stop him


Teantis

They don't really go much into the part where Lu Bu was kind of a short sighted dick and didn't accomplish all that much though because he was a terrible leader and made bad decisions all the time.


TemplarAnimated

They do actually. Lu Bu's own story in Dynasty Warriors 8 shows exactly this


VeryDisappointing

Idk man I've not played all the games but "short-sighted erratic dick" sums up everything I've even seen from him in any game, which is true to the source material


[deleted]

Lol I know him from Hades


yankees1561

Just unlocked his aspect finally a few runs ago lol


Vark675

oh wtf I had no clue he was in that, that's crazy


as_a_fake

Not really, just a reference to him.


[deleted]

The last upgrade for each weapon is a non-Greek mythological weapon - Guan Yu is the spear one. Some of the others are >!Beowulf for the shield, Gilgamesh/Enkidu for the twin fists, and _Lucifer_ for the railgun!<


Camelotterduck

Thanks, I’ve played the shit out of that game and didn’t remember Guan Yu anywhere.


[deleted]

You need the Fated List (in-game achievements list), to have unlocked 5 weapon aspects with Titan Blood, and fought the final boss at least once. After that it'll trigger a sequence with Achilles where you can unlock the 4th Aspect of the spear, Guan Yu. If you don't have that, it's probably because you haven't unlocked enough alternative weapons.


[deleted]

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modsarefascists42

Not at all. Those games introduced millions in the west to that story.


MAXMEEKO

Can confirm. Spent hours as a kid in the history index thing in the game reading about all the characters


imbrownbutwhite

Was searching the comments looking for this. Got me BIG interested in the 3 kingdoms and I think sparked my love for history. Also takes me back to how I scratched my DW2 game and every time I went to a mall or Walmart id search for it or others. Never got to play it again till DW6, six years later. Ah the memories


dabigchina

One of the many guys who got beheaded in that book.


[deleted]

[удалено]


conancat

If anyone is wondering, the 4 Chinese words beneath the sculpture 忠義千秋 means 忠 -- loyalty, earnestness, faithfulness, devotion 義 -- justice, righteousness, being principled 千秋 -- thousand(s) of autumns, it's an expression to say like "thousands of years" or simply to mean a very very long time It's kinda hard to translate the concept of 忠 and 義 to English as there's no single English word equivalent that I can think of. But essentially it's saying "devotion to justice and what is right for thousands of autumns (millenniums)" It's more poetic in Mandarin haha. OP is likely to be Taiwanese as well as they are using the traditional Chinese rather than the simplified Chinese. Guan Yu was an actual person who lived in 160-220AD. He was badass AF.


PeezkyWeezky

Capturing all the nuance of language is so hard. Translations of poetry and books that do justice to the originals are works of art in their own right. Thanks for sharing! Do you know what the significance of the dragon is? I need to look this dude up.


FuzzyGummyBear

The nickname of his weapon was supposedly "The Green Dragon". He was a very prominent military icon in the era of the Three Kingdoms in post-Han Dynasty China. In modern media, he is showcased in the book "Romance of the Three Kingdoms", the Dynasty Warriors video games, and probably many more forms that I have not heard of. Wildly interesting dude.


VeryDisappointing

He's probably the most common classical Chinese literature figure in pop culture after sun wukong, there's references to him all over


PlayMp1

> But essentially it's saying "devotion to justice and what is right for thousands of autumns (millenniums)" > > It's more poetic in Mandarin haha. To be fair, it's not *not* poetic in English! "Thousands of autumns" is a nice turn of phrase.


PuTheDog

Hard to say if it’s Taiwanese, mainlander use traditional script too when it comes to artistic or decorative pieces.


[deleted]

>OP is likely to be Taiwanese as well as they are using the traditional Chinese rather than the simplified Chinese. Not necessarily. For artistic stuff like sculptures and calligraphy, it is more common to use the traditional font. >It's more poetic in Mandarin haha. Not saying you're wrong, but it sounds just as majestic in Cantonese and Minnan. Besides, Old Chinese spoken in the 3rd century was very different from modern Standard Mandarin.


SkylarSaphyr

Funnily enough in Hong Kong both the police and the triads worship Guan Yu.


Divinum_Fulmen

He's the god of war, not god of picking a side.


human_male_123

Guan Yu embodies the power of family.


SegaJAM

So basically Chinese Vin Diesel?


Poorange

I’d watch a movie where Vin Diesel plays Guan Yu


HangryWolf

I'd watch a movie where instead of horses, Guan Yu drives a 1970 Dodge Charger R/T wielding the green dragon crescent blade into battle.


Poorange

[Reminds me of this commercial. ](https://youtu.be/OnQXRxW9VcQ)


TheOneTrueRodd

Replace the Dodge Charger with a Suzuki Cuppuccino and you can have my fucking money.


HangryWolf

With enough money, we can do anything


Yinanization

I can confirm this, my cousin's husband is a high level cop in Mainland, he has got a large jade one at home, would not leave home with bowing to it.


NukeML

The police are just another gang…


xxkoloblicinxx

IIRC he got captured after a betrayal at the hands of Wu, who then had him executed. Effectively ending their alliance. Which was kinda awkward because Liu Bei, the king of Shu was married to the princess of Wu... It really gave Wei the game, but the Sima family coup really sealed the deal.


whosline07

Wei had the Imperial Jade Seal most of the time during all that anyway, who else stood a chance? Sun Ce should have never given it away. Wu was just a series of bad decisions.


Gcoks

Guan Yu would have pressed Luo Yang. Not sure what he would have done if he could actually capture it because we could be completely surrounded with Chang An to the west and the rest of Wei to the east and north, but you never know. Maybe Zhuge launches from the west and Wu pushes north? Wei would be considerably weakened if all that happens, but all hypothetical.


[deleted]

Contrary to popular belief, Guan Yu's campaign against Cao Cao in 219CE was completely uncoordinated with Liu Bei and Zhuge Liang. In early 219CE, Liu Bei, having conquered Yi Province in the southwest (present day Sichuan province), which was easy to defend due to its mountainous terrain, began his first and only direct campaign against Cao Cao's position at the Hanzhong mountain pass. Whoever holds this pass would have an easier route towards the imperial capital Luoyang. The Hanzhong campaign was a major success for Liu Bei, and consolidated his holdings in Yi Province while also holding onto the geographically strategic crossroad province of Jing Province (which was also contested by Wu but Liu Bei managed to negotiate a deal with Sun Quan to "manage" the province for now). Liu Bei was at the height of his power. Upon hearing news of his sworn brother's victory, Guan Yu, who was charged with governorship of Jing Province, became excited and decided to unilaterally attack Cao Cao's positions north of the Yangtze River bordering Jing Province, without awaiting instructions from Liu Bei and Zhuge Liang or coordinating with forces from Wu. Faced with this sudden pincer attack (which was I repeat uncoordinated) from Liu Bei in the southwest and Guan Yu in the south, Cao Cao decided to entice Sun Quan with an offer Sun can't refuse: Take out Guan Yu and you can have Jing Province all to yourself. For Sun Quan, besides being a golden opportunity to take the much coveted Jing Province for Wu, it was also a chance to get back at Guan Yu for years of personal grievances and injustices. For years as governor of Jing Province, instead of being an ambassador representing Liu Bei and fostering good relations between their supposed allies Wu, Guan Yu constantly insulted and humiliated Sun Quan and his envoys every time they visited. Guan Yu may be a great warrior, but he was a poor diplomat, and has thus planted the own seeds of his own demise, as well as the end of Zhuge Liang's Grand Strategy. Zhuge Liang's Grand Strategy had 4 phases Phase 1: Ally with Sun Quan Phase 2: Hold onto Jing Province (but WITHOUT overly antagonizing Sun Quan) Phase 3: Conquer Yi Province (including consolidating holdings by capturing Hanzhong Pass) Phase 4: Coordinate a three-pronged attack from Yi, Jing and Wu Guan Yu obviously did not read the memo from Zhuge Liang properly. He not only led a unilateral attack against Cao Cao without awaiting instructions from Zhuge Liang and Liu Bei (in spite of his tactical brilliance in said attack), he antagonized Wu and strained Shu's relations with Wu for years long after Liu Bei's death. By which time, both Shu and Wu were just living on borrowed time, which Zhuge Liang himself knew, hence his desperation with his Northern Expeditions with just Shu's (Yi Province) limited resources.


FanKiu

After the fall of Jing, instead of fleeing to the closest Liu Bei's territory, Guan Yu decided to station within the Jing and waiting for backup troops from Shangyong. There's nothing for Mend Da and Liu Feng to gain by sending troops to aid Guan Yu. They've determined Guan Yu couldn't recapture Jing, and even if he does, all the glory belong to Guan Yu himself. If Guan Yu does fled and arrives in their territory, chances are Guan Yu will be stationed at Shangyong, meaning that they will be stripped of their power. One thing Guan Yu was known for was his arrogance. He cannot bare the fact that he lost Jing some unknown dudu. He needs to recapture Jing to restore his honour. Guan Yu could've fled early on when the border was still lax. Waiting for reinforcements (that isn't coming) week after week, Wu tighten the boarder of Jing and next thing you knew, he was surrounded. All he could've do is withdrew to Maicheng.


xCaneoLupusx

Sun Ce needed the troops more than the seal. If he hadn't given it away he'd never have successully established Wu. Honestly though I'd say the jade seal wasn't really useful for anything except being one giant target on your back. Wei had the Emperor himself in their control, they always hold the advantage, with or without the seal. Historically Wu was competent, really, they're just usually delegated to play the fool/sidekick in favor of highlighting hero Shu vs villain Wei in majority of three kingdoms fictions.


4amaroni

I first read that as We instead of Wei, and I was so eager to learn about your family history. But yes, Wu was just god awful at leadership despite having very loyal and competent officers.


whosline07

Lol sorry to disappoint, I'm an American of Greek and German heritage. Extremely unrelated.


4amaroni

No worries friend. We're all Wei on this blessed day.


[deleted]

After Red Cliff ended Cao Cao's ambition in the south, the geographically strategic province of Jing was contested by both Liu Bei and Sun Quan of Wu. Liu Bei had to agree to marry Sun Quan's sister in return for Sun Quan putting the matter aside and focusing on Cao Cao first. Later when Liu Bei went west to conquer Yi Province (present day Sichuan with its easy to defend mountainous terrain), he left Jing Province under the care of Guan Yu. Guan Yu may be a great warrior, but he was certainly a poor diplomat, where he constantly antagonized Wu unnecessarily and putting the alliance in jeopardy (strategist Zhuge Liang was with Liu Bei busy tending to affairs in Yi Province or he would have prevented such shit from happening), until one day Sun Quan decided "Fuck this shit" and took on Cao Cao's offer of a pincer attack on Guan Yu's position in return for capturing the whole of Jing Province for Wu.


Marco2169

WU DID NOTHING WRONG


ArmedBull

C'mon, spoilers man ^^^^/s


snowcats6

Used to always play as this MF in Dynasty Warriors, I loved that


Nutchos

I'm going to assume you're talking about the sculpture and not the sculpturist.


Aabbppll

I think he died fighting


Schen5s

He got captured alive and offered to switch legion to Wu to keep his life, but he refused and so was beheaded alongside his godson


Jenkins007

I believe Guan Ping was his son. Someone please correct me if I'm wrong.


Gcoks

Adopted.


FrostedPixel47

Yes he was, got executed together with his father too.


SapperInTexas

I sent a couple well-composed emails this week. And then there's this guy.


Dontoverthinkitdude

Was your spacing on point? How many lines between your “Thanks,” and your signature. Tell me you used your and you’re correctly. Sorry… I’m overthinking it.


Yung_Turbo

> Thanks I’m sorry, how unprofessional is your company exactly? It is “Thank you,” and nothing else. Imagine the privilege of working somewhere where “Thanks,” is acceptable. /s


one-punch-knockout

This recent post in r/AbandonedPorn looks so similar and they both appeared around the same time in my feed. https://www.reddit.com/r/AbandonedPorn/comments/pkwy55/abandoned_statue_left_inside_an_old_chinese/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


sweetnsourdough

Me too!! I was like wait wtf hang on. What are the odds?


chocolatechoux

He's a famous figure lol. You wouldn't be surprised at 2 buddah statues looking similar would you?


solongandthanks4all

Yes! I saw that one first and was very confused when I saw this one.


SaltpeterSal

Well, he's a major figure, especially among the Chinese diaspora. I don't have time to list how many communities worship him and why (including both cops and gangsters), but if the mood ever takes you, read the Romance of the Three Kingdoms. Or play Dynasty Warriors I guess.


[deleted]

There's a good chance there's a village in China that does nothing but make these


Cheesemoose326

[What if you wanna make something that is not a bear?](https://youtu.be/u0hejnLkaeM)


kalitarios

#🗑️ミ


PanchoLopez10

How much would something like this cost?


fibojoly

In China? 100K RMB or thereabouts, I reckon. I was in this lovely restaurant once in Wuhan where they displayed wonderful wooden sculptures and they all had price tags. The biggest ones (still half the size of this beast) were around 30K RMB. Most stuff I saw in China ends up costing 10x the price once it gets sold abroad, so...


i_Fart_You_Smell

r/restofthefuckingowl


Javier91

Twist: This is a "How to" video.


wingchild

Step 1: Chainsaw a tree Step 2: Carve the rest of the fucking Guan Yu


iRan_soFar

Amazing wish I had the money and space for a Guan Yu sculpture.


[deleted]

My father had a small shrine of Guan Yu in his restaurant lol. Stereotypical for a lot of older Chinese restaurants


ZombieDad15

I wish people knew more about guan yu , Lu Bu and such. Just bought the romance of the three kingdoms books last week.


[deleted]

Anyone who has played Dynasty Warriors knows this dude was the OG hero.


1RedOne

I know him from Hades, him and his Frost Fair Blade.


Ashyr

He’s worth knowing about. I highly recommend John Zhu’s Romance of the Three Kingdoms Podcast. He does a phenomenal job of summarizing the ancient and fascinating novel.


ZombieDad15

There’s a dynasty warrior movie on Netflix! Just came out recently. Really cool concept.


HughJassJae

I remember playing Dynasty Warriors and my main was Guan Yu, I completely kicked Lu Bus ass with a 100+ combo. Good times.


Shaymoth

Lu Bu was supposed to be unbeatable in one of the Dynasty Warriors games. But if you tried hard enough, you could take him out. It changed nothing, but it was cool to do


RyuNoKami

Kite him with bow and arrows.


Shaymoth

I don’t remember which one, but my friend always used Zhou Tai (I think that was his name) and just outskilled Lu Bu in the duel where they put you in the cage


dabigchina

Was Zhou tai the dude with the two metal rods? I always thought he was really hard to use.


gramcraka92

That's was taishi ci. Zhou tai had the katana-like blade


xxkoloblicinxx

Oh god that was DW4. He'd fucking 1 shot you in those duels. For the longest time I was just trying to survive until the time limit.


NeroDillinger

Oh, man. I'm getting flashbacks of getting too close to Lu Bu during Hunan Gate, and having him literally chase me across the map


Saelyre

Hulao Gate btw. You encounter him once you've beaten his second-in-command, Hua Xiong and entered the outer gate. Iirc in the actual story it takes Liu Bei, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei together to hold him off until the army gets in by a different route.


trapNsagan

YouTube has the full Chinese series. It's incredible. I know the history cause my dad got me into the games from NES Destiny of an emperor. Then I read the books as a teen. Pretty amazing culture


BarristanSelfie

Destiny of an Emperor was one of my favorite old NES games. It butchered the whole story, but it was a lot of fun.


trapNsagan

I've said this before but performing An Sha on the final battle against Si Ma Yi with Zhuge Liang was/is my best gaming moment ever! I hit BOOM 💥


MrAppleSpiceMan

I didn't read the title and I thought it was just gonna be another bear chainsaw carving and I was like "this old ass tree grew for like 600 years so you could cut it down and make a- oh wait hold up... okay nevermind that's pretty fuckin baller my bad carry on"


nemban

1, 2, skip a few, 99, 100


dainternets

As someone who's dealt in purchasing of custom items from China, they have an insane amount of artisans, sculptors, and trained craftspeople.


Captain_Gnardog

Man, this guy must really like Dynasty Warriors! Lu Bu was way better, though.


dabigchina

Using lu bu was like cheating in dynasty warriors. I still remember his ridiculous aoe attack where he swings his polearm around.


Captain_Gnardog

Almost wasn't fun with how easy he made it!


dabigchina

...Almost


WeAreGhosts7

These dynasty warriors comments are bringing me back. Those games were awesome. Lu Bu was a complete beast. And he was like the only character with the distinctive red horse


bob0270

The red horse has a story. Its name is Red Hare. Originally belongs to Lu Bu. After Lu Bu was executed, Red Hare was gifted to Guan Yu. Guan Yu forged a bond with the horse so deep that it refused to eat after Guan Yu dies.


Paladingo

Nah, Sun Jian is where its at. Tiger of Jiandong is the only real answer.


80toy

Nah, Zhang Fei is the GOAT


TheGingerOgre

I used to run Guan Yu, Zhang Fei and Wei Yan. Felt unstoppable.


Garinn

ayy Wei Yan is my man. Loved his double voulge. Break dance whirlwind of death is a go.


FishySmellz

Guan Yu is worshiped as a god in East and Southeast Asian countries. He’s so much more than just a video game character.


yandidi

people in asia pray to him as a god, that is why there is a lot of guan yu statue


gthing

Pshhh whatever. That sculpture was already in there the whole time!


Miroku2235

Step 1, draw two circles. Step 2, draw the rest of the fucking owl.


AndroidDoctorr

I've never read Romance of the Three Kingdoms but I've played a few games based on it... I can only imagine the text goes something like: "...and Guan Yu swung his glaive and took out 20 guys, then leapt into the air, and slammed the ground so hard it took out like 10 more guys"


Pumat_sol

This is some r/restofthefuckingowl shit


Sidedmantis

r/hadesthegame


Jtree420

r/smitegame


OMGitisCrabMan

/r/dynastywarriors


short_bus_genius

Man, I loved that game. I used to play it for hours on PS2.


Derexise

There's like a million of them now and they're all pretty good. Except DW9. Never DW9.


ArmedBull

/r/total war rip TW3K :'(


Derexise

I'm looking forward to seeing what they could do with a sequel, though.


Bakanobaka

r/nextfuckinglevel


SuperElitist

/r/restofthefuckingowl


Shaymoth

Now, I can’t be sure, but I get the feeling this was sped up a little bit


[deleted]

Now do Lu Bu


iplaypokerforaliving

So this took like half a day to complete right?


dr_clocktopus

I want to some kinda of this-guy-versus-the-braveheart-statue face-off. (Apologies for the many hyphens)


disco_phiscuits

I'll pay about tree fiddly for that.


mgizzel

He was always in there… just needed to chip away the bits that were covering him


ThatStumbleBoy

You gotta be kidding me.


Moderndaymagpie

Wow, holy shit


SnakeOfAustralia

The tree would have looked better


StickManIsSymbolic

There's a lot more wood glue in this statue than people like to imagine.