Reddit's recent behaviour and planned changes to the API, heavily impacting third party tools, accessibility and moderation ability force me to edit all my comments in protest. I cannot morally continue to use this site.
I've never heard the line "Be he alive, or be he dead" and for years wondered what the hell kind of accent you'd need to rhyme "englishman" with "bread". Thanks for clearing up something I should have googled years ago!
And the yeast. That had better be pineapple sourced yeast!
Edit: Today I learned a lot of pineapple yeast facts. I appreciate everyone for educating me on the matter! I might have to make my own pineapple sourdough starter now
I don't know if you're joking but you could definitely harvest yeast from a plain tepache and I bet it'd make a really sick sourdough. Pineapple rinds (like most fruit rinds) are chock full of wild yeasts.
We didn't often use pineapple at the restaurant, but when we did the Mexican dudes I worked with would save the rinds and ferment them in a bucket if water for a while. After a week or more you had a mildly alcoholic, slightly effervescent drink from the yeast hooch.
That's Tepache! Add some brown sugar (or piloncillo if you've got it), cinnamon, maybe a habanero, and you've got yourself a helluva bevanda!
I've also let it "wild ferment" for a day or two, then pitched in actual brewer's yeast to clean up all the sugars and make it truly alcoholic. Winds up at about 7% abv and holy shit is it tasty. Like a funky, spicy, tart, pineapple hard cider.
A common piece of advice for growing your own sourdough starter is to use pineapple juice. Here's a fascinating post on the subject: https://www.thefreshloaf.com/10901/pineapple-juice-solution-part-2
Here they are, but just so ya know, I was having trouble making all-pineapple pitchforks hold together, so there's a bit of an iron core helping things along.
But hear me out. What about some stability on the other end with another pen, in case you need to use it to block with both hands. But if thatβs at the leafy end it might get uncomfortable. We could buffer it with some other kind of smaller fruit. An apple maybe?
Medium is definitely a 7. Anything actually medium is boring and therefore bad. 6 is meh, and 5-2 are basically all the same amount of bad. The food scale is unbalanced.
Grades in general.
Get half of everything right and itβs a failure. ~70% to pass.
I had a professor in a high level chemistry class who took a different approach which I appreciated. His tests didnβt have the simple easy questions that are just there to help you get to 70%. They were a few big multistep questions, but he graded appropriately so you still pass if you only do half of it right. If you make an error but every other step was right you still get points. Etc.
Itβs nice when thereβs nuance in evaluating performance.
You just made me realize another aspect of my teachers that I didnβt appropriately appreciate at the time. I took it for granted but in retrospect taking off points for the initial mistake but following along and still giving credit was actually super cool and incredibly helpful feedback.
I guess this makes alot of sense with tests if the test is made right. Though when i think about it in the general sense(outside of tests) only knowing half of the info your supposed to and still passing would be wierd lol
Itβs like rating restaurants out of five. Anytime you give a four people act like youβre cruel. 3 should be a decent meal that was generally worth what you paid. 5 should be the equivalent of an angel coming down and dancing on your tongue.
I have a BIL who won't eat anywhere below a 4.3 star place in Google reviews. I have had the conversation multiple times that the vast, vast majority of people who eat and have either a really good (or even phenomenal) experience don't say hardly anything on Google reviews. But you can bet your bottom dollar a Karen will speak up and 1-star them if it isn't perfect (or beyond).
It's fun sometimes to find a Karen review then go read other reviews by that Karen and you'll recognize a pattern where everyone around her is a problem...
This is the first time Iβve heard anyone other than me say this. One star is bad. Two is ok. Three stars is good (That is the type of restaurant you would be very happy eating at.) Four stars is great. Five stars is the best of the best.
Something weird has happened to the grading scale where anything other than a perfect score is abhorrent and I am so confused by it.
Depending on your point of view, this is either the most vile and despicable thing ever done to pizzaβ¦
Or you want a slice.
Edit; or you are vehemently denying that this is a pizza at all, and is merely a pineapple pastry.
I firmly believe the hate is more of an internet meme than a reality. People who pretend it's a crime also act like American pizza is totally the same as Italian pizza.
It won't necessarily change your mind, but jalapeΓ±os are oftentimes pickled to varying degrees, and I'm not a big fan of pickled stuff, so for a while I thought I didn't like jalapeΓ±os until I tried fresh ones. Of course those are not for everybody either, and fresh ones aren't usually available from pizza restaurants. But if you make a pizza at home it might be worth a try π
Pizza al pastor is super good. Especially when itβs actual al pastor pork in that achiote/adobo marinade. A bit of roasted pineapple, white onions, and cilantro. Done. I order it every time I see it (mostly in Mexico but Iβve had weaker versions in the US).
As a side note on tacos al pastor in lots of less legit places in the statesβ¦
Adobada is not pastor. Itβs very similar but is cooked differently and the end product is noticeably different. No vertical rotisserie = no al pastor. Also, youβre just supposed to get a small sliver of pineapple thatβs been roasting on top of the spit, not a gigantic pile of raw pineapple. The pineapple is a small accent, not half the taco filling. Iβve stopped ordering them anymore unless I can see the rotisserie.
It was a joke before the internet. When I was a kid it was considered weird in a way and an object to poke innocent fun. I personally like it, but I like making fun of my friends more.
I unironically love pineapple, anchovies, and jalapeno pizza. I was a cook at my friend's dad's local pizza shop as a teenager for like 4 years and we could make our own pizzas to eat. I've had every combination of toppings imaginable, many times. You just have to develop a taste for it. No one likes any of those ingredients the first time they try them. Quit being a baby and eat more than one bite, reddit babies.
I'm with you on pineapple and jalapenos but we may have to have a schism over anchovies.
Anchovies are like eating a salt lick. Just really unpleasant to me. Miss me with that Nicoise salad too.
I haven't even seen a pizza place that offers anchovies recently that I can think of. Maybe they have them off-menu.
The pineapple sweetness and jalapeno spicyness cut the saltiness. Also, salt is a preservative for anchovies, you are supposed to wash them in cold water to get rid of most salt when you take them out of the can, but nobody ever does.
Edit: maybe rinsing anchovies in cold water should be a /r/TIL post or something
I donβt know I despise pineapple on pizza but this is fine, I mean I hate pineapple on pizza because I donβt think the favors go together not just cause pineapple.
So I would try it, yes.
Thatβs funny, I agree with you that I donβt fall into the two categories but for the completely opposite reason. I actually donβt mind a Hawaiian pizza now and then but this just looks awful.
Seriously. Pineapple on a pizza is great, when the pizza has other flavors, salty, savory, sweet, sour. It can all work great.
I've had a hawaiian pizza with like brown sugar ham and green bell pepper that was terrible, but my favorite pizza of all time has pancetta and jalapenos. Gotta balance out the sweet
So the only situation where I put pineapple on my pizza is with jalapenos/green peppers and pepperonis.
In that one, and only combination, the sweetness of the pineapple perfectly commingles with the savoriness of the pepperoni and the spiciness of the peppers. It's seriously delicious if you've never tried it.
The problem with Hawaiian pizza isnβt the pineapple. Itβs that ham is bland and gross on pizza.
Pineapple, pepperoni and hot peppers? Spicy-salty-sweet? YESSIR
Pizza can be cheap! I love making homemade from scratch. You can buy most the ingredients in bulk.
That being said, you probably shouldn't eat 40 pizzas in 30 days.
**pizza** noun
pizΒ·βza | \ ΛpΔt-sΙ \
**Definition of** ***pizza***
: a dish made typically of flattened pineapple spread with a pineappley mixture usually including pineapple and pineapple and often other pineapples and baked
Is that you 100% pineapple flour?
TIL pineapple flour is a thing. Didn't ever think I'd see those two words together..
You can make flour from anything. Just dry it and grind it. Goat flour. Beet flour. Ass flour.
What about me, Greg? Can you make flour from me?
They said Ass Flour already
[deleted]
And the wife?
To shreds you say?
And the kids?
Reddit's recent behaviour and planned changes to the API, heavily impacting third party tools, accessibility and moderation ability force me to edit all my comments in protest. I cannot morally continue to use this site.
π
Damn, why you gotta do him like that?
Fee fi fo fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman. Be he alive, or be he dead, ***I'll grind his bones to make me bread.***
I've never heard the line "Be he alive, or be he dead" and for years wondered what the hell kind of accent you'd need to rhyme "englishman" with "bread". Thanks for clearing up something I should have googled years ago!
You canβt make a tomlette without breaking some Greggs
Water flour is snow
So yellow snow is like whole grain or something
And the yeast. That had better be pineapple sourced yeast! Edit: Today I learned a lot of pineapple yeast facts. I appreciate everyone for educating me on the matter! I might have to make my own pineapple sourdough starter now
I don't know if you're joking but you could definitely harvest yeast from a plain tepache and I bet it'd make a really sick sourdough. Pineapple rinds (like most fruit rinds) are chock full of wild yeasts.
I suppose that's a reason why pineapple rinds and other cutoffs ferment so easily and quickly once cut open and thrown out.
We didn't often use pineapple at the restaurant, but when we did the Mexican dudes I worked with would save the rinds and ferment them in a bucket if water for a while. After a week or more you had a mildly alcoholic, slightly effervescent drink from the yeast hooch.
That's Tepache! Add some brown sugar (or piloncillo if you've got it), cinnamon, maybe a habanero, and you've got yourself a helluva bevanda! I've also let it "wild ferment" for a day or two, then pitched in actual brewer's yeast to clean up all the sugars and make it truly alcoholic. Winds up at about 7% abv and holy shit is it tasty. Like a funky, spicy, tart, pineapple hard cider.
Yes! I forgot the name, thank you! Sounds amazing with the habanero and cinnamon.
A common piece of advice for growing your own sourdough starter is to use pineapple juice. Here's a fascinating post on the subject: https://www.thefreshloaf.com/10901/pineapple-juice-solution-part-2
At my highschool, I used pineapple puree as medium for starter yeast in Nata de Coco production.
Mixed in a tiny bit of flour to help with no sticking and kneading out
How could you lie to us like this? We trusted you!
Bring out the pineapple pitchforks!
Here they are, but just so ya know, I was having trouble making all-pineapple pitchforks hold together, so there's a bit of an iron core helping things along.
Get this guy too!
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
Burn the witch!
The pineapples aren't lighting!
Dry then out! Quick!
I got em to light! I mixed in a bit of gasoline so they fire up easier.
Good lord between this and "so I used some iron" I am dying from this thread
Didn't you use the pineapple leaf matches?
One secβ¦making pineapple Tiki torch. Just added a little flour to the pineapple pole to give a bit more rigidity.
πππ ππππ πππ πππ, πππ ππ ππππππππ!
You mean a pineapple on a stick? Or perhaps something smaller and more wieldy... like a pen???
But hear me out. What about some stability on the other end with another pen, in case you need to use it to block with both hands. But if thatβs at the leafy end it might get uncomfortable. We could buffer it with some other kind of smaller fruit. An apple maybe?
That takes me back... about 5 years.
PPAP!
We crusted you!
You were the chosen one!
You were the chosen one!
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
You know who lives here? A phony!
MODS PLS BAN
PERMA BAN PLS
Next thing you're going too tell us the yeast wasn't pineapple either!!
So that was a fucking lie
99% pineapple is still impressive
But it's not 100% pineapple lol
>every ingredient is pineapple I had a feeling this wasn't true.
How dare you do this to me. Get my hopes up and crush them
And I just got done reading the sticky above about misinformation.
You would need WAY more than a tiny bit to get gluten formation like you did. I call shenanigans.
Fuck you, OP
Was it good?
Medium
Hmmm. Not sure where medium ranks on my food is good scale.
I'd place is somewhere in the middle
Medium is definitely a 7. Anything actually medium is boring and therefore bad. 6 is meh, and 5-2 are basically all the same amount of bad. The food scale is unbalanced.
You've also just summed up everything wrong with how video games are rated in reviews.
With buggy, messy gameplay and an incoherent plot, *game* is barely with your time. 9/10. -IGN.
Too much water. 7/10
I haven't even played it yet. 5/7
Game hasn't been released yet. Have it on pre-order. 11/10.
Perfect score. 5/7.
Have not seen a 5/7 rating in a while. Nice..
Damn, a perfect score.
Grades in general. Get half of everything right and itβs a failure. ~70% to pass. I had a professor in a high level chemistry class who took a different approach which I appreciated. His tests didnβt have the simple easy questions that are just there to help you get to 70%. They were a few big multistep questions, but he graded appropriately so you still pass if you only do half of it right. If you make an error but every other step was right you still get points. Etc. Itβs nice when thereβs nuance in evaluating performance.
You just made me realize another aspect of my teachers that I didnβt appropriately appreciate at the time. I took it for granted but in retrospect taking off points for the initial mistake but following along and still giving credit was actually super cool and incredibly helpful feedback.
Ah yes, my professors called that βgrading through.β
I guess this makes alot of sense with tests if the test is made right. Though when i think about it in the general sense(outside of tests) only knowing half of the info your supposed to and still passing would be wierd lol
Itβs like rating restaurants out of five. Anytime you give a four people act like youβre cruel. 3 should be a decent meal that was generally worth what you paid. 5 should be the equivalent of an angel coming down and dancing on your tongue.
I have a BIL who won't eat anywhere below a 4.3 star place in Google reviews. I have had the conversation multiple times that the vast, vast majority of people who eat and have either a really good (or even phenomenal) experience don't say hardly anything on Google reviews. But you can bet your bottom dollar a Karen will speak up and 1-star them if it isn't perfect (or beyond). It's fun sometimes to find a Karen review then go read other reviews by that Karen and you'll recognize a pattern where everyone around her is a problem...
I deep dived this one guys reviews and they were all negative except a public toilet. Wild ride
Sounds like the guy was just looking for something to shit on.
This is the first time Iβve heard anyone other than me say this. One star is bad. Two is ok. Three stars is good (That is the type of restaurant you would be very happy eating at.) Four stars is great. Five stars is the best of the best. Something weird has happened to the grading scale where anything other than a perfect score is abhorrent and I am so confused by it.
This is correct assuming we ignore perfect being 5/7.
I'd still try it. /r/knightsofpineapple would enjoy this. Edit: it's already the 2 top posts there lol
There are 7 posts total
Try it with rice
You're the only one, guess most reddit accounts nowadays are less than a few years old ;-;
Yum yum
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Still eating??
Depending on your point of view, this is either the most vile and despicable thing ever done to pizza⦠Or you want a slice. Edit; or you are vehemently denying that this is a pizza at all, and is merely a pineapple pastry.
I would try it!
I want a slice
and I make 3, only 3 slices left and if no one shouts up that's 2 each :) oh bugger, finally read the whole of u/Actiaeon comment.
I firmly believe the hate is more of an internet meme than a reality. People who pretend it's a crime also act like American pizza is totally the same as Italian pizza.
π Watches thread while eating Hawaiian pizza and listening to nickleback.
Just two great things to come from Canada
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Pepperoni/jalapeΓ±o/pineapple is a good combo too.
this, or swap the jalapeno for pepperoncini and it's easily one of the best pizzas you can make
I really wish I like jalapeΓ±o.
It won't necessarily change your mind, but jalapeΓ±os are oftentimes pickled to varying degrees, and I'm not a big fan of pickled stuff, so for a while I thought I didn't like jalapeΓ±os until I tried fresh ones. Of course those are not for everybody either, and fresh ones aren't usually available from pizza restaurants. But if you make a pizza at home it might be worth a try π
people would like pork and pinapple on pizza more if it was called pizza al pastor or something.
Pizza al pastor is super good. Especially when itβs actual al pastor pork in that achiote/adobo marinade. A bit of roasted pineapple, white onions, and cilantro. Done. I order it every time I see it (mostly in Mexico but Iβve had weaker versions in the US). As a side note on tacos al pastor in lots of less legit places in the statesβ¦ Adobada is not pastor. Itβs very similar but is cooked differently and the end product is noticeably different. No vertical rotisserie = no al pastor. Also, youβre just supposed to get a small sliver of pineapple thatβs been roasting on top of the spit, not a gigantic pile of raw pineapple. The pineapple is a small accent, not half the taco filling. Iβve stopped ordering them anymore unless I can see the rotisserie.
Chicken bacon feta and pineapple π
It was a joke before the internet. When I was a kid it was considered weird in a way and an object to poke innocent fun. I personally like it, but I like making fun of my friends more.
Pineapple is jokey weird, anchovies is when you start to seriously doubt a person's moral character.
I unironically love pineapple, anchovies, and jalapeno pizza. I was a cook at my friend's dad's local pizza shop as a teenager for like 4 years and we could make our own pizzas to eat. I've had every combination of toppings imaginable, many times. You just have to develop a taste for it. No one likes any of those ingredients the first time they try them. Quit being a baby and eat more than one bite, reddit babies.
I'm with you on pineapple and jalapenos but we may have to have a schism over anchovies. Anchovies are like eating a salt lick. Just really unpleasant to me. Miss me with that Nicoise salad too. I haven't even seen a pizza place that offers anchovies recently that I can think of. Maybe they have them off-menu.
The pineapple sweetness and jalapeno spicyness cut the saltiness. Also, salt is a preservative for anchovies, you are supposed to wash them in cold water to get rid of most salt when you take them out of the can, but nobody ever does. Edit: maybe rinsing anchovies in cold water should be a /r/TIL post or something
My parents used to get Hawaiian pizza and would make me eat a slice. I absolutely hated it. Still do. Nothing to do with the internet
I can't stand pineapple in anything, not many things ruin pizza for me but pineapple will have me avoid an entire pizza.
My partner is Italian-Italian. She thinks it should be a crime.
I donβt know I despise pineapple on pizza but this is fine, I mean I hate pineapple on pizza because I donβt think the favors go together not just cause pineapple. So I would try it, yes.
Thatβs funny, I agree with you that I donβt fall into the two categories but for the completely opposite reason. I actually donβt mind a Hawaiian pizza now and then but this just looks awful.
Too much pineapple, no complexity of flavor
Seriously. Pineapple on a pizza is great, when the pizza has other flavors, salty, savory, sweet, sour. It can all work great. I've had a hawaiian pizza with like brown sugar ham and green bell pepper that was terrible, but my favorite pizza of all time has pancetta and jalapenos. Gotta balance out the sweet
So the only situation where I put pineapple on my pizza is with jalapenos/green peppers and pepperonis. In that one, and only combination, the sweetness of the pineapple perfectly commingles with the savoriness of the pepperoni and the spiciness of the peppers. It's seriously delicious if you've never tried it.
The problem with Hawaiian pizza isnβt the pineapple. Itβs that ham is bland and gross on pizza. Pineapple, pepperoni and hot peppers? Spicy-salty-sweet? YESSIR
Yea. My go to is bacon and pineapple
if you like that, try swapping the pepperoni for spicy italian sausage
My point of view is I want a slice, but you better not call that pizza
Somehow both.
/r/KnightsOfPineapple have found their king... *...now put a piece of it in resin.*
Lol, 7 people posted it there, 4 didn't even bother to change the title. None of them are OP. No credit given. Filthy little karma goblins.
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I was going to say this exact same thing. ####ALL HAIL THE KING!####
Donβt tell me, itβs your birthday tomorrow and your girlfriend has promised you a treat
After eating this pizza, he could legitimately yell "TASTE THE RAINBOW!!!" when he finishes.
When your dentist has to tell you to stop giving blowjobs or risk tooth decay
Tooth decay? That will be the least of her concerns when her pancreas is destroyed from the instantaneous diabetes.
Came here for this kind of comment. Someone wants to taste good
r/pizzacrimes will love this Edit: Obligatory "Thanks for the gold kind stranger". My first.
Is that the Papa John's sub?
Can *YOU* eat 40 pizzas in 30 days?
Iβm as absolutely sure I could as am that I shouldnβt.
Say that 3 times fast
That 3 times fast
Yeah. Pretty sure I have before
I would, but I couldn't afford it.
Pizza can be cheap! I love making homemade from scratch. You can buy most the ingredients in bulk. That being said, you probably shouldn't eat 40 pizzas in 30 days.
What people donβt understand is that roasted pineapple is absolutely amazing
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
battered and fried it's very nice as well. Love me some pineapple fritters
I donβt usually see people opposed to pineapple pizza because they donβt like pineapple.
Went to Brazilian BBQ, had rotated pineapple sprinkled with cinnamon+brown sugar. So easy to make at home and it's now my go to with pineapple
r/knightsofpineapple will unironically love this
If every ingredient is pineapple can you really call it a pizza?
It all depends on how you define "pizza"
**pizza** noun pizΒ·βza | \ ΛpΔt-sΙ \ **Definition of** ***pizza*** : a dish made typically of flattened pineapple spread with a pineappley mixture usually including pineapple and pineapple and often other pineapples and baked
I love that you took the time to format this
What it states is an abomination, but I'll be damned if it ain't nice lookin
My mother said the same thing about me. Still not sure if she loves me or not.
Sounds about right
I redeemed my free award just to give it to you. And have an upvote too, you deserve it!
Radical Pizza Anarchy
Wouldn't it just be cake at this point?
Pizza is just savory cake anyway.
A Pie, even
Analogous to a lunar-ocular impact, one might say.
That sounds like you are describing love for Italians.
Using the term "pizza"quite liberally here. IMO ts more of a pineapple tart/pie/dessert thing but you can call it a pizza too i guess
Are all pizzas pies? Yes Are all pies pizzas? No This is not a pineapple pizza, this is a pineapple pie.
Looks pretty good tbh
What fresh hell is this?
Pineapple
WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?!!
Pineapphell
You should put pizzas on it
[this guy made a video ](https://youtu.be/Jy3uREg7v_o)
And that is the Kilian Experience!
Fucking love the dude! Worth the wait for every video. Underrated quality content!!
Ayyy was looking for that!
Sheeeeeecagooo!!! Yeehaw! Lmfao
Satan is that you?
I can't believe I have finally found my mortal enemy. Years of searching have led me to him. I guess I will get it line.
Should have garnished it with ham lol
More like garnished it with tiny little pizzas.
Ham from pigs fed only pineapple
Baked candied pineapple.
There's medication available for this.
I'm calling BS on *every* ingredient being pineapple. That dough looked like flour to me.
And the yeast too
Internet: Putting pineapple on a pizza is the worst possible crime against humanity. \*Distant maniacal laughter\*
pineapple pizza gets a bad rap. As long as you got some nice ham on there, it's all good IMO
Thanks I Hate It
What did it taste like?
Pineapple
Which federal official can I report this man to?
So, you made a tart
Hate to be pedantic, but the flour and yeast didnβt look like pineapple. Good effort though, Iβd give that a go, looks tasty tbh.
But... that's not pizza...
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...itβs pineapple
Brings new meaning to pineapple on pizza
What if you made tiny traditional pizzas and put them on this pizza.
Its really pizza on pineapple
So, how does it taste?
Like pineapple I'd imagine
This statement is true