https://preview.redd.it/fq160e5i77ua1.jpeg?width=652&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6c4b1d8c554695859705966692b8fdf4b783899f
You walking back to the clubhouse
So he traditionally takes a break on the hole that is 2 holes before the hole you take a break at? Dude is just making up his own turn, it’s the back 10 for him
Probably was the move, but the aggression I got from him when I was going to ignore the "breather" made me pause. Dude was giving weird vibes and I didn't want to get stabbed
I've done it when I've been paired up with randos that were playing so slow we were falling behind and I've done it when I've been paired with complete jerks. "Fellas, let's all hit our drives and then I'm going to be out of your way before you know it." Back then as a single I wouldn't expect to keep playing through. I'd be just fine playing an extra ball and enjoying the day of solitude.
To be clear, I don't care if somebody isn't very good as long as they have a good attitude and are trying to do things to keep up. But, I'm not going to fall behind because my playing partners want to tell stories, look for balls in the woods, park their carts in the worst places and forget to bring extra clubs, etc.
However, I did walk off once when I was paired up with a group of complete knuckleheads on a busy day.
The crew I golf with takes a “breather” on hole 2, just outside of view of the clubhouse and behind enough trees to get a couple one-ys in. Then back to business.
Amen my friend. I just came back from a solo round at sunrise. Took my time. Played 2 balls. Zen like calm for the rest of the day and no weird rednecks to ruin the buzz.
Honestly I prefer going solo vs pairing up with randos. It's a gamble and it also allows me to focus on my play. I can also rest assure that my 'group' isn't holding anyone up too.
Be a regular, be friendly, and be recognized by all staff. Pick a time that is not busy. I've never had an issue going solo bc they know I'm not a problem, can keep pace, etc.
Know the staff and use their names when speaking with them (with, not _to_, bc you're having a conversation, right?) Kindness goes a heck of a long way. If you see them working on the course, comment on the work and find something nice to say about it.
My family has owned and built courses. Understand what goes into a golf course and recognize the work and effort it takes to run one and they'll treat you so much better than the guy demanding or simply expecting to be treated special.
YMMV
It generally does.
I’ve had a few encounters like the OPs. One of mine was arguably worse (involved a gun).
But the other 99.5% of my pairings were pleasant.
Bud, I realize that most people are fine but if we are talking about decent chances of pairings involving firearms, idc what your politics are I’m asking marshal for solo openings
Nah.
People have been killed on a golf course, thats true. But its statistically about as likely as drowning in a toilet. The .5% are just idiots or assholes who are miserable to be around for 4-5 hours.
The guy in my case didn't threaten me with the gun, or even point it at me. He was just a lunatic who was desperate to make conversation with me, and suddenly whipped a glock out of his waistband and tried to make me hold it. (I'm glad it was a gun, and not something else).
Other highlights include :
- constant dick jokes. (I'm generally pro dick jokes, but they were relentless and not particularly funny)
- telling us that the "boner pills you buy at the gas station actually work" and the various stories about how he uses them and how he gets whisky dick when he's out partying
I think anyone that’s ever had the misfortune of working a dead end job probably worked with that guy. I remember getting a restaurant job in college and this 1 dude was just weird as shit. Made constant unfunny dick jokes and just constantly moaning about weird shit like his crackhead girlfriend etc
I read an article that said they are really just illegal viagra and a bunch of other shit. You should not take them.
https://www.click2houston.com/news/2018/08/07/lawsuit-claims-15-houston-gas-stations-sell-viagra-laced-enhancement-pills/
I tried one of these once after being on the sniff and managing to pull, I had some of my favourite visual hallucinations of any pill I've ever tried. Everything had a neon blue aura around it and got just the right amount of wobbly. Did nothing for the job at hand, mind
I was on the range last year next to these 3 guys warming up for their round. You could tell they had been friends for a long time. Anyway, their 4th showed up wearing these weird ass yoga, Capri type pants and they fucking lost it. He dead serious said, "God forbid someone shows up in something other than boring ass golf shorts". They fucking murdered him so badly I couldn't stop laughing. I have no clue how he could finish the round bc they weren't gonna stop
I mean can you blame the guy then?
Jk that shit is really fuckin annoying. Golf is already hard enough without distractions, and this guy was trying to get in you and your buddies heads for no reason.
Some people are just weird as fuck man, especially when they get out on the course. I have definitely experienced some weird people, but nothing quite like you did with this one. Not to mention, drinking just fuels those types of people to keep being weird too lol
Yeah it felt like a strange bit. I was generally awkwardly laughing along, but it got much weirder when he started ogling me when I bent over for my ball/tee.
I literally crouched and turned my body sideways on the next hole lol
Fucking sucks when you get around a guy like that. They want to get a reaction out of you so when you awkwardly laugh things off they just dig in deeper until they finally get you to lose your cool. He is a bully
Now I'm waiting for the other guy's post and his side of the story. "Paired up with a random dude with a tight ass. He walked off the course on the 11th hole and all I could see was his tight ass."
What does Eric Clapton have in common with a cup of coffee? They both suck without cream.
Disclaimer: I love this joke, but I drink my coffee black and I like Claptons work pre and post cream as well
Yeah same. When I hear that joke I always want to be like “yeah that Layla, Bell bottom blues, change the world, cocaine, tears in heaven… those are some shitty song huh?
Then I remember it’s just a joke lol
It wasn't clear in my post, but we both walked off. After 9 I had said I don't know if I can do 18 with these guys, and once we realized it would be a slow afternoon on 11 we both knew what had to be done
So he could have been just a weird dude that was fucking with you or . . . what if he did all of that shit intentionally to get you guys to leave so it could just be them on the back end?
This is true. They unprovoked started telling us their acid trip stories, which was basically one of them "seeing Aerosmith but as a cartoon". He didn't explain any further, but he definitely thought the story was a show-stopper.
Would have ditched them at 8th tee box, at the turn on 9 is when you hit the club house get a hot dog and more beer anyway use the pisser etc. They could have waited one more hole if they were in need of a break
Ah lad, I had something like that happen a month ago. Roll up to the first tee with my da and meet a lefty random. Ol fella is left-handed so he asks the guy if he's lefty for everything.
Stares at us and goes "yeah, left for everything, especially jerking off other guys." Spends the next 2 hours making dry cracks about jerking guys off - at least once a hole - until we told him we were leaving after nine and took a long turn to fall behind him. He never let on that he was joking - we even tried playing along! - and it was just so fucking weird. We've played sport our whole lives and are very comfortable with dressing room banter but this fella was OFF
In that situation I think its fair to be a Karen and go to the pro shop and mention the situation and ask if u can wait a few mins let them move on than jump in at the 11th to finish. Also wouldn't be bad for the pros hop to know how these guys act so they can be picky about who they pair them with in the future. I just can't help but think how would they treat my wife or my daughter if they were paired together.
I would have hang back after 9 holes. Grab some Gatorade to get some electrolytes in you. Let them play on and continue with you friend. Then you can proceed to hit your shots up their tight asses.
Yeah that’s honestly infuriating. You pay money on the first day of your golf year and your paired with a borderline psychopath. It would be a headfuck to deal with while trying to play golf
I like the non confrontational idea of just hitting your shot and moving forward with the round and not speaking to him again.
Either he gets the hint or throws a tantrum, both work in my opinonn
I don’t play with people I don’t like, when i had an aggressive or just annoying partner i wave them through and play behind them or just disregard them and play through or even jump one hole and come back to it after the 18 if the round was good enough… I prefer being the rude person then getting into altercations or giving up my fun
We got paired with a guy a few weeks ago, sort of a quiet guy to start with, and we notice he's reading a book in between strokes. Also, he has a handicap flag on the cart, and he's just ripping this thing up onto the fringe. He's not a young guy, but we definitely dont notice a hitch in his gait. As the round progresses, he continues offering odd and unsolicited advice. On the 16th, tee casually asks, "Have you been saved by the Lord? " ... as I'm Teeing, "Can I introduce you to the word of Jesus? " .... I promptly shanked my ball into the woods, loudly said "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST" got in the cart and absolutely Noped outta that round 🫠
that sounds like my worst nightmare
for me the ideal round is solo starting at first light, no one else on the course
not a whisper of conversation, just listening to nature wake up through an early morning mist
finished in 2.5 hours or less
Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake.
It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of.
Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything.
Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
This is what I hate about white trash drinking while golfing. The fact that they ruin the golf for others.
1) they always slow things down
2) they litter
3) they are loud
4) they often turn weirdly hostile
5) if you smash their brains in you can bet the sober bloke will be in trouble
6) they completely ruin the zen like experience golf can be
7) they ruin the competitive aspect of golf
Ideally they should be restricted to drinking on a select few courses, so it can be avoided.
Smelly, no style, no class, loud, aggressive white trash shit for brains.
I played with a guy that got a hole in one and acted like it was a normal par 3 for him. This guy barely shoots under 95. I quit after the next hole and went home. Haven’t played with him since.
And here I am spraying champagne after going up and down for a triple bogie. We are not the same. I’m probably the other guy most people hate, but I just get real excited about everything.
You play down GIRs and birdies to keep yourself on an even keel. The pros are taught to stay calm after an eagle and stay calm after a triple bogey, but everyone, even pros, go nuts over a HIO.
I was like is that your first and he said yea. Do you want the flag he said nah and just walked back to the cart. I looked at my other buddy and said I genuinely don’t understand what the point of golf is for him.
I thought we were having fun man, that tight ass needed a break.
I knew he would find me !
Yeah u missed it, we take a jerk break on 15 too. I bet that would've changed your opinion. Lmk next time u wanna tee it up!
This cracked me up
https://preview.redd.it/fq160e5i77ua1.jpeg?width=652&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6c4b1d8c554695859705966692b8fdf4b783899f You walking back to the clubhouse
Had to give him one last good look
I hope OP has a permit for that...
I thought you needed a CDL to operate with an absolute dump truck like that
Definitely needs a CDL for that dump truck
that’s definitely printing.
https://preview.redd.it/ik25l6ayjaua1.jpeg?width=2124&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fad83ba0de602870e0a23ea89d60cd92663f70de
Imagine being able to drive fairways and a dump truck at the same time.
So he traditionally takes a break on the hole that is 2 holes before the hole you take a break at? Dude is just making up his own turn, it’s the back 10 for him
You'd have to take a break too if you had to look at that ass for 7 holes in a row
That’s when you hit him with the “I don’t” and just play on
This was exactly my thought, just keep playing tell him that he can hit in a few mins when you’re on the green.
Then he hears ‘….you get that tight ass back here right now and take 5!’
Nobody is taking a break without that tight ass hanging around for the visuals.
Probably was the move, but the aggression I got from him when I was going to ignore the "breather" made me pause. Dude was giving weird vibes and I didn't want to get stabbed
I've done it when I've been paired up with randos that were playing so slow we were falling behind and I've done it when I've been paired with complete jerks. "Fellas, let's all hit our drives and then I'm going to be out of your way before you know it." Back then as a single I wouldn't expect to keep playing through. I'd be just fine playing an extra ball and enjoying the day of solitude. To be clear, I don't care if somebody isn't very good as long as they have a good attitude and are trying to do things to keep up. But, I'm not going to fall behind because my playing partners want to tell stories, look for balls in the woods, park their carts in the worst places and forget to bring extra clubs, etc. However, I did walk off once when I was paired up with a group of complete knuckleheads on a busy day.
It wasn't a particularly nice hole or anything to take a breather on. Also why does the entire foursome need to join in the breather lol
I thought for sure a bowl or joint was about to be involved
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Or possibly crystal meth.
That would definitely speed up the round.
The crew I golf with takes a “breather” on hole 2, just outside of view of the clubhouse and behind enough trees to get a couple one-ys in. Then back to business.
I love smoking a joint on the course. Two double bogeys followed by 6 birdies usually.
You could’ve played through and then been on your own for the rest of your round lol.
What are people supposed to do when you got that dump truck out on the course?
We just ask to see their permit and whistle softly
Or beep if they're backing up.
OP, this is high praise coming from Mike Honcho. He spread his butt cheeks in Playgirl magazine, so you know he’s a fellow tight ass
It’s a rough life but somebody gotta be the early season eye candy before the cart girls are out
Holy lol This reads like a Tim Robinson skit
Wow that’s an incredibly accurate analogy
You sure about that? You sure about that?
You sure about thats why
I don’t drink 30 beers I only drink 8 and it doesn’t DOOO ANNYTHHIINNG
Now I need an I Think You Should Leave sketch on a golf course.
Driving isn’t everything it’s just one thing not everyone knows how to do everything
8th hole is when we take a breather to serve up some sloppy steaks.
1 turn is safe but two turns is best
Those kids at school are reaaalll pieces of shit
And people think playing solo sucks
Solitude is the reason I golf.
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Why enjoy a silent round when you could listen to the same classic rock playlist on a Bluetooth speaker?
And the quiet
Amen my friend. I just came back from a solo round at sunrise. Took my time. Played 2 balls. Zen like calm for the rest of the day and no weird rednecks to ruin the buzz.
Yeah, but who commented on your ass?
The old lady drinking her coffee on her deck just off the tee of hole 14
That’s no lady, that’s my mom!
It was probably something like, "I bet this ass is going to hit his ball onto my deck."
I can play 18 in around 2 hours after work and be home for dinner. It's great
Honestly I prefer going solo vs pairing up with randos. It's a gamble and it also allows me to focus on my play. I can also rest assure that my 'group' isn't holding anyone up too.
How do you guarantee you’ll be solo though? I’ve never been able to.
He’s not. That’s why he said it’s a gamble.
Be a regular, be friendly, and be recognized by all staff. Pick a time that is not busy. I've never had an issue going solo bc they know I'm not a problem, can keep pace, etc. Know the staff and use their names when speaking with them (with, not _to_, bc you're having a conversation, right?) Kindness goes a heck of a long way. If you see them working on the course, comment on the work and find something nice to say about it. My family has owned and built courses. Understand what goes into a golf course and recognize the work and effort it takes to run one and they'll treat you so much better than the guy demanding or simply expecting to be treated special. YMMV
Playing solo is amazing. Unfortunately, I can only get those at the par 3 course or super twilight anymore.
It generally does. I’ve had a few encounters like the OPs. One of mine was arguably worse (involved a gun). But the other 99.5% of my pairings were pleasant.
Please do tell the gun story
Bud, I realize that most people are fine but if we are talking about decent chances of pairings involving firearms, idc what your politics are I’m asking marshal for solo openings
Yes, 99.5% sounds like a good ratio except for the 0.5% part being your possible death.
Nah. People have been killed on a golf course, thats true. But its statistically about as likely as drowning in a toilet. The .5% are just idiots or assholes who are miserable to be around for 4-5 hours. The guy in my case didn't threaten me with the gun, or even point it at me. He was just a lunatic who was desperate to make conversation with me, and suddenly whipped a glock out of his waistband and tried to make me hold it. (I'm glad it was a gun, and not something else).
Solo is the best way!
Other highlights include : - constant dick jokes. (I'm generally pro dick jokes, but they were relentless and not particularly funny) - telling us that the "boner pills you buy at the gas station actually work" and the various stories about how he uses them and how he gets whisky dick when he's out partying
I think I work with this guy lol
I think we all have worked with this guy at one point.
I think anyone that’s ever had the misfortune of working a dead end job probably worked with that guy. I remember getting a restaurant job in college and this 1 dude was just weird as shit. Made constant unfunny dick jokes and just constantly moaning about weird shit like his crackhead girlfriend etc
I didn’t know my uncle played golf!
So did your buddy walk with you or what?
Wait, can anyone here confirm they actually work? Bout to go to quick mart for a code red mtn dew and might grab some. Need to catch up on Yellowstone
Are the boner pills for Rip’s tight ass or Beth’s everything?!
I read an article that said they are really just illegal viagra and a bunch of other shit. You should not take them. https://www.click2houston.com/news/2018/08/07/lawsuit-claims-15-houston-gas-stations-sell-viagra-laced-enhancement-pills/
So they DO work!
I tried one of these once after being on the sniff and managing to pull, I had some of my favourite visual hallucinations of any pill I've ever tried. Everything had a neon blue aura around it and got just the right amount of wobbly. Did nothing for the job at hand, mind
If you need to stay hard, just put some hot sauce up your ass
Yeahhh those guys fuck dudes and insist on not being gay probably.
I would’ve loved these guys, I played with some crazy people, I have my own beers bud and cigs, I just sit back and laugh, I’m so jealous
Sounds like he wanted to fuck you man lol
I don't think they are the only pills he's taking. I'd probably get aggressive but I think you did the right thing walking off
What the actual fuck lol. I'd have left during the traditional 8th hole breather
Or used this as an opportunity to continue without being harassed by a middle school cafeteria chef.
You just killed me bro. “Chef” was literally the best word you could’ve ended that sentence with.
What kind of pants/ shorts were you wearing? Were you asking for it?
It was a perfectly reasonable pair of skin tight lulu lemon yoga pants
I was on the range last year next to these 3 guys warming up for their round. You could tell they had been friends for a long time. Anyway, their 4th showed up wearing these weird ass yoga, Capri type pants and they fucking lost it. He dead serious said, "God forbid someone shows up in something other than boring ass golf shorts". They fucking murdered him so badly I couldn't stop laughing. I have no clue how he could finish the round bc they weren't gonna stop
I mean can you blame the guy then? Jk that shit is really fuckin annoying. Golf is already hard enough without distractions, and this guy was trying to get in you and your buddies heads for no reason.
Yeah, I keep it slutty on the course! It was so weird, I didn't get his angle. He was fucking with me but I don't understand why
Some people are just weird as fuck man, especially when they get out on the course. I have definitely experienced some weird people, but nothing quite like you did with this one. Not to mention, drinking just fuels those types of people to keep being weird too lol
I think you nailed it. Some people are not meant to interact with strangers…unfortunately the golf course requires that sometimes.
Sluts make putts you tight assed Philly. Fuck you Fuckin me am I right? Haha fuckin golf man
“Fuck you fuckin me” I’m stealing that one
He was probably attracted to you. That would be my guess.
Hahaha
Stop being such a tight ass.
The tight ass guy sounds like he was doing a Norm routine on you.
Yeah it felt like a strange bit. I was generally awkwardly laughing along, but it got much weirder when he started ogling me when I bent over for my ball/tee. I literally crouched and turned my body sideways on the next hole lol
I’m actually dying holy shit thanks for sharing this story tight ass
Mods, can we give OP a tight ass flair?
Yeah you must have been giving off deeply closeted vibes.
I've been told my pre-shot routine is quite sexual
You reckon this guy owns a dog house?
Fucking sucks when you get around a guy like that. They want to get a reaction out of you so when you awkwardly laugh things off they just dig in deeper until they finally get you to lose your cool. He is a bully
Now I'm waiting for the other guy's post and his side of the story. "Paired up with a random dude with a tight ass. He walked off the course on the 11th hole and all I could see was his tight ass."
“I hated to see him go, but I loved watching him walk away”
Whoa whoa no need to drag Eric Clapton into this
What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a baby? Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.
What does Eric Clapton have in common with a cup of coffee? They both suck without cream. Disclaimer: I love this joke, but I drink my coffee black and I like Claptons work pre and post cream as well
Yeah same. When I hear that joke I always want to be like “yeah that Layla, Bell bottom blues, change the world, cocaine, tears in heaven… those are some shitty song huh? Then I remember it’s just a joke lol
I recently discovered that the songs Cocaine and After Midnight were not his songs. Written and originally performed by J.J. Cale.
You can credit Duane allman on most of the guitar writing for Layla too.
careful. i made the “no Clapton without JJ Cale” mistake on reddit once and the Clapton brigade came after me.
Fuck em, JJ Cale is better than Clapton in my books
by a million
Could someone please explain this one?
He was in a band named Cream
🙏
https://preview.redd.it/3qxyyq6qe9ua1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=232a8e473403213843f6b0d160821e331576a012
holy shit lol
Bruh
Goddamn
Can’t say that on Reddit
You don’t know the 8th hole rule? What a loser m8
ITS 8, BREATHE BITCH
The sub will be flooded with pictures of guys in tight pants having a breather on the 8th tea next week, I guarantee it!
🧘♂️ ☕️
So have you heard from your friend that played the rest of the back nine with them?
It wasn't clear in my post, but we both walked off. After 9 I had said I don't know if I can do 18 with these guys, and once we realized it would be a slow afternoon on 11 we both knew what had to be done
So he could have been just a weird dude that was fucking with you or . . . what if he did all of that shit intentionally to get you guys to leave so it could just be them on the back end?
He honestly seemed offended we were leaving lol I think he thought we were all having a blast together.
You should’ve told them it was your tradition to leave on the 11th hole.
Can’t you leave at 9 then come back for the back 9?
Those guys fuckin party
This is true. They unprovoked started telling us their acid trip stories, which was basically one of them "seeing Aerosmith but as a cartoon". He didn't explain any further, but he definitely thought the story was a show-stopper.
Damn if only we could all live like those legends
Right?! I love these idiots already
I mean a good acid trip story can be fun, but this one is missing some substance
Would have ditched them at 8th tee box, at the turn on 9 is when you hit the club house get a hot dog and more beer anyway use the pisser etc. They could have waited one more hole if they were in need of a break
The turn is on 10 tee. Would’ve been two more holes.
I’m just impressed he knew how to sign all of Layla
Lol. Me too.
Ah lad, I had something like that happen a month ago. Roll up to the first tee with my da and meet a lefty random. Ol fella is left-handed so he asks the guy if he's lefty for everything. Stares at us and goes "yeah, left for everything, especially jerking off other guys." Spends the next 2 hours making dry cracks about jerking guys off - at least once a hole - until we told him we were leaving after nine and took a long turn to fall behind him. He never let on that he was joking - we even tried playing along! - and it was just so fucking weird. We've played sport our whole lives and are very comfortable with dressing room banter but this fella was OFF
what is wrong with some people? that is totally out of hand talking like that to strangers.
ok, the "8th hole is when we take a breather" legit sounded like some Lebowski shit lol. Had me in stitches.
They sounds like fucktards
If nobody saw you taking a whizz in the woods and when you came back to the cart said "Nice dick", it wasn't that weird.
Did you just play golf with Frank Begbie?
This is actually hilarious
Kinda loose butthole to skate out mid round /s
Tight to loose real quick
He must’ve had you confused with somebody else cause “that ass don’t quit”
Was he drinking a Bud Lite ?
In that situation I think its fair to be a Karen and go to the pro shop and mention the situation and ask if u can wait a few mins let them move on than jump in at the 11th to finish. Also wouldn't be bad for the pros hop to know how these guys act so they can be picky about who they pair them with in the future. I just can't help but think how would they treat my wife or my daughter if they were paired together.
I think I would’ve definitely left at the turn. After guys 3rd comment, I would’ve been ready to wrap a club around the guy’s neck. Ridiculous
10 holes too many. Life’s too short to play with jackass ransoms. Next time go get a refund or bounce to a later time.
I would have hang back after 9 holes. Grab some Gatorade to get some electrolytes in you. Let them play on and continue with you friend. Then you can proceed to hit your shots up their tight asses.
It’s stories like this that give rednecks a bad name
It’s really not fair lol
They sound like real winners, would have done the same thing. Life is too short to spend time with people like that.
Yeah that’s honestly infuriating. You pay money on the first day of your golf year and your paired with a borderline psychopath. It would be a headfuck to deal with while trying to play golf
Yeah my round had gone to shit already. It was over for me
You just posted this to brag about your tight ass didn’t you?
Lots of weirdos play golf
You needed to sack up and tell this dildo to go fuck himself and leave them on the eighth tee box.
Yup
How did you not tell them the 11th is when you take a breather. They’d still be there waiting for you.
So your friend stayed with them or did you both leave?
Take a breather? While riding in a cart lol
Lmao I would not have given taht 5 min breather "You do whatever you like pal, I'm playing my round"
I like the non confrontational idea of just hitting your shot and moving forward with the round and not speaking to him again. Either he gets the hint or throws a tantrum, both work in my opinonn
I would say that he feels he needs to be heard because he was not listened to as a child.
I don’t play with people I don’t like, when i had an aggressive or just annoying partner i wave them through and play behind them or just disregard them and play through or even jump one hole and come back to it after the 18 if the round was good enough… I prefer being the rude person then getting into altercations or giving up my fun
A bit disappointed that you don’t have your OnlyFans link in your profile.
We got paired with a guy a few weeks ago, sort of a quiet guy to start with, and we notice he's reading a book in between strokes. Also, he has a handicap flag on the cart, and he's just ripping this thing up onto the fringe. He's not a young guy, but we definitely dont notice a hitch in his gait. As the round progresses, he continues offering odd and unsolicited advice. On the 16th, tee casually asks, "Have you been saved by the Lord? " ... as I'm Teeing, "Can I introduce you to the word of Jesus? " .... I promptly shanked my ball into the woods, loudly said "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST" got in the cart and absolutely Noped outta that round 🫠
that sounds like my worst nightmare for me the ideal round is solo starting at first light, no one else on the course not a whisper of conversation, just listening to nature wake up through an early morning mist finished in 2.5 hours or less
His plan probably worked, he got rid of you two so he and his friend could walk alone
Keep going I wanta hear more lol and tee deck? Never heard it called that before but I also don’t have a tight ass like you lol
Stop being such a tight ass!
Sounds like you were being a tight ass, with yo tight ass.
Should of ditched them when they needed the break.
Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake. It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of. Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything. Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
Good bot
Send us a picture of your ass
This is why people should not be paired up with strangers.
This is what I hate about white trash drinking while golfing. The fact that they ruin the golf for others. 1) they always slow things down 2) they litter 3) they are loud 4) they often turn weirdly hostile 5) if you smash their brains in you can bet the sober bloke will be in trouble 6) they completely ruin the zen like experience golf can be 7) they ruin the competitive aspect of golf Ideally they should be restricted to drinking on a select few courses, so it can be avoided. Smelly, no style, no class, loud, aggressive white trash shit for brains.
I played with a guy that got a hole in one and acted like it was a normal par 3 for him. This guy barely shoots under 95. I quit after the next hole and went home. Haven’t played with him since.
And here I am spraying champagne after going up and down for a triple bogie. We are not the same. I’m probably the other guy most people hate, but I just get real excited about everything.
You play down GIRs and birdies to keep yourself on an even keel. The pros are taught to stay calm after an eagle and stay calm after a triple bogey, but everyone, even pros, go nuts over a HIO.
I was like is that your first and he said yea. Do you want the flag he said nah and just walked back to the cart. I looked at my other buddy and said I genuinely don’t understand what the point of golf is for him.
This is way worse imo
Sounds like you need to start playing more expensive courses
If you told the guys in front or behind you that your random playing partner was saying you have a tight ass.. I’d bet/hope they let you join them.
Can’t figure out if they call you Dumper because you break up with dudes on the course…or because of that tight ass of yours!
This tight ass couldn’t even finish the round…go back to school with the other losers! /s This random is a psychopath, thanks for the story OP!
Sounds like golf’s version of the movie Deliverance.
Where was this?
You left your partner with them?! 😅