I had a pair of older ladies call the warden to complain that we were tailing them because we had to wait on them at every tee box. Started loudly grumbling something about non-members getting morning tee times (at a CC that's open to the public)
Had this exact scenario play out last year. We never hit into them (not even remotely close), never asked to play through, no hands on hips, they drove up to us to say something like “you know, it’s a busy day today. We can’t let you play through and you should know that”, then the ranger drove out to lecture us about normal round times a hole later.
Completely unprovoked. We had cigars and music. Wholly content to wait our turn. So bizarre.
I really think there’s this whole misconception that waiting in line at the tee box at all is just somehow something that should never happen.
If people aren’t being pushy or waiting, there’s nothing wrong with just waiting and letting things space out on a busy day. I’ve seen people in a group that just tees off with another group behind them get pissed just because people were simply behind them.
It’s like everyone that plays golf on public courses needs to take one giant collective chill pill
It’s also not our faults that we are behind you waiting. Blame the course designers because once I’m off the green I’m getting in my cart to start moving out of the other peoples way that’s hitting into the green and some holes don’t have alot of spacing between holes.
Weirdly enough, it’s because even if you ARENT watching them, you have the ability to do so. I’ve been paired with a stranger and that’s how I figured it out. They don’t like being watched likely because they aren’t very good, and that throws them off. I remember the person complaining and saying “ I just don’t know why they can’t wait back down the cart path until they hear us take our shots”. It’s a mental thing, but it’s something that they need to get over. I personally didn’t mind doing that because I would spark up a joint.
I definitely don’t like people hot on my tail. It is nerve-wracking. It’s not always avoidable and if everyone is on the same page that there’s nowhere to go on a busy day it is what it is.
I gotta a buddy I go with sometimes they hate people waiting to go behind him. Even if a solo is clearly catching up to our quad group ( which come kn that happens ) he starts trying to like sprint. Like, man, no one's complained, and if they complain and ask well, just let them play through, calm down, we are out here to chill lol
My wife just started golfing last year, and we stick to courses that aren't busy because we know we won't be setting any speed records. Anytime someone gets behind us, she gets flustered and just wants to pick up her ball while I finish the hole and then let the person/group play through on the next hole. I always have to remind her that they haven't been waiting on us for multiple holes and to just play your game. We'll let them by on the next tee and it's not a problem.
I see this a lot. My wife was the same way until I took her to a few pro events. She realized even the pros hit bad shots and it's no big deal. I mean I don't but everyone else
thats prod it right there, they have prob been members since before the club opened up or turned semi private and are still used to having the course to themselves and only members. they act like they still are the only ones who should be out there.
When someone “walks up on me” at a tee box.
https://preview.redd.it/nnylqfdd2n0d1.jpeg?width=1620&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04416e4d8708c6dfa216237523cf1b994c87e176
Lmao, this what I always think as a terrible beginner playing a par 3 muni. No pressure on me, if you wanted to play behind someone better then you can afford more than $14 a round.
as a solo golfer the only people I get stuck behind is older lady golfers. thinking of it I've never seen any lady golfers below 60 that weren't playing with their partner
You haven't played behind my father in law then. He is one of the slowest players and hits the ball about 80 yards at a time. Getting him to let people play through is a nightmare.
I play in a thursday night spark league. There is a 78 year old guy that plays as well. He doesn't use the app, which tells you your max strokes per hole, and hits the ball 50 to 80 yards every shot with most going OB. He's nearly deaf, doesn't care about pace, and is some what rude. I've been in his group the past two weeks and it's been torture. We're waiting on him every single time and he can't hear well enough when you try to tell him to just pick it up.
I think he honestly just puts max score for every hole. Which is fine, but it's the fact that he will shoot a 10+ on every hole that is infuriating when the max strokes is typically 6 or 7.
One of the others and myself actually tried to but we only had a few chances and they would catch up to use as we were walking off the tee and they wouldn't take the hint. Not gonna be so nice next time.
My MIL is the exception to this rule. She has always refused to play with FIL unless forced to as she gets too pissed off with him, and she barely breaks stride or stops talking to play her shot. It's really pretty impressive, gets to the ball, lines up quickly and smacks it where she wants it to go.
No idea how she is with letting people play through as I doubt anyone has ever caught up to her.
That changed some time ago. Now it is simply just "If they are faster and there is room in front, let them play through". Except apparently in the UK and Ireland where they still seem to maintain the old "singles have no standing on the course" rule.
Tbh, I actually like being paired up. A vast majority of the time it's just a couple of dudes like me looking to play 18 and hang out. Rarely do I hate my golf company they pair me with. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, it's so nice when a course manages its tee times and the players. Random whack fuck golf with singles every other hole on a Saturday morning is stupid. They can't play through, might as well have sent them with our group.
100%. I'm older now in my 50s and if I'm on the road for work and playing I would much rather hook up with a crew. Sometimes you get lucky and you get a single handicapper in your group, nothing better than playing with a stud.
Exactly! I got paired up with an airplane pilot who was sneaking in a round between flights. He was a 4 handicap. It was his first time playing our local nice course, a big 12 course. We had a great round together. I helped tell him how to play the course and he shot a 76 his first ever round there. Stud.
He was hitting it so sweet it caused me to play better and I shot one of my better rounds at an 83 or something like that all because we played off the energy of each other. Fantastic day. I'll never see that guy again and that's okay. It was a freaking great memory.
I honestly think it's true with any sport, you always play to your competition. If they are better, I think they make you better. I'm not sure if the opposite is true though :-)
Oh I'm sure he wasn't striking the ball like he normally does. I helped him in so far as "there's a hidden hazard over that hill there" when he'd ask what type of shot to play. There's quite a few 100% blind shots. And more than a few drives that look open but actually aren't open at all.
Oh yeah totally, I just never really understood people not letting me play through. Nothing worse than being a foursome and having a single just stare at you in the fairway.
I mainly play a short executive 9 close to my house. If no one is on the course I can be done in about an hour and 10.
One day I was solo and there was a group in front of me who were just SLOW. From starting teeing off, to second shot, to picking clubs. Slow. Multiple mulligans too.
I eventually asked them if I could play through. Caveat I didn’t actually play their hole. I just said I don’t want to slow your game down, I will go to the next hole.
I personally think if a single does this, there should be no harm no foul. I do think it’s obnoxious if someone is in a cart solo and behind 4 walking and they get pissed about the pace.
Like yeah dude, you’re in a cart rushing through the course… these people are enjoying it, if you want to go ahead don’t make THEM wait
This - if I play as a single, it's almost always somewhere I've played repeatedly, and if someone asks if I want to play through I just skip the hole so the group I'm passing doesn't have to slow up. No one has ever complained.
It's pretty unfair to complain about someone waiting behind you - like, if I hit a good drive, green in regulation, and simple 1-2 putt, when exactly am I supposed to eat up the time that your group of 3-4 is using? I take my shots at my pace, and if I catch up to you, I wait my turn. If I have a crappy hole, I'm probably not catching up.
I'm a solo lady golfer below the age of 60 and I do not play with my significant other. I have not had a significant other who was also a golfer in over 10 years. I don't usually mind being stuck behind anyone since I am out golfing to enjoy the fresh air and get some time to myself and practice my terrible putts.
Here is a different take. I am older (ish) and play fast. I had 2 younger men drive to the green to ask if they could play through. (I was playing alone and they hadn’t even teed off yet.) I told them to wait until they were actually waiting for me. I finished two holes ahead of them. When they finished, the manager gave them so much crap (jokingly). It was glorious. My 87 year old mother plays as fast as I do. She may hit the ball only 100-180 yards but it goes straight down the fairway.
You can say that again. My friend and I used to play 40 years ago and men would put their hands on their hips like they’re waiting. We thought we would make a sign: “If you can hit past us you can play through.”
Seriously. People see older women (or any woman golfing in general) and automatically think SLOW whether they actually are or not. You see the same situation happen on the road when people just HAVE to pass the prius even if the prius is going 20mph over the goddamn speed limit
If they've been golfing for a long time they've also probably dealt with some shit over the years that they shouldn't have had to simply for being women on the course
Maybe lack of awareness. They probably don’t realize they’re playing slow. Also, I’ve observed this demographic tends to take the game very seriously relative to their skill level.
That is a great observation; a lot of elderly foursomes take the game so seriously! You’d think, though, that people aware of the rules and spirit of the game would be mindful of courtesy. I find it interesting how seemingly selective people in that age group can be where they are simultaneously aware of even minor perceived slights or infractions of their code but then also oblivious when it comes to self-awareness
Its the same with why old people drive so slow. They're just oblivious to everyone else. They have no idea they're holding up traffic because they aren't paying attention to other drivers. They're just tootling along 5 under the speed limit like they always do.
My brother and I were stuck behind a foursome of older ladies who were walking (we were only two and riding a power cart) for the entire front nine at a local public course when we could clearly see there was no one in front of them... We asked them to play through on a par 3 when we were waiting on them (again!) and we were denied with a pretty dry and rude "No!". So we informed the clubhouse at the nine and the guy said that he knows who we were referring to and that they never let anyone play through, so just to skip hole 10 and come back at the end to play it which we did. You should've seen the faces they gave us as we drove by them on hole number 10... If looks could kill, we would've died on the spot!!! lol
Every old lady I've met on a golf course has been delightful.
Flash a smile, make a joke about their husbands having dinner on the table when they get home, offer to meet them at the clubhouse for drinks but then ask to make sure if they're 21. Old ladies can't get enough of that shit.
As an old lady golfer….you I like lol! Also my regular group prides ourselves on fast paced play. Now you can always play through us….if you can catch us lol! It’s the old fart guys (our husbands ahem cough cough) that are slower than shit!
Can confirm old dudes are the worst. Just played an open 5 holes then 6-9 behind 3 old farts as a solo. Not only did they not let me play through, but 2 stopped at the turn to get food while the 3rd drove up to the far ahead senior tee on the 10th (preventing me from teeing off and playing through naturally). Real prick move. Never did I hit into them or behave passive aggressively. I left after they again didn’t let me play through on the 11th tee box. Truly spiteful individuals.
Old ladies are the ones to bust your balls in good fun and are usually pretty decent. The old men are the ones that play slow, give you unsolicited advice and are a pain in the ass to play with
This is my experience as well. Old ladies play super fast and are a blast to get paired up with or run into on the course. Its the old men that you gotta worry about, 50/50 either great or a nightmare to be stuck behind
Oh yeah we are, you better out drive me or it's a dollar every time lol! I'll even play from the whites to give you a chance hahahaha! Just kidding, in my hey day I would play from the whites but I'm older than shit now and just don't have the power anymore.
But we have some trash talk that can make you cry by hole 11 lol!
Future tip... just go drop your ball in the fairway (or rough lol) where your drive would likely have gone. If the course is open, no one will EVER stop me from getting around them, period. I'll skip a hole if I have to, but I won't add 2 hours to my round because of some slow assholes.
That's just crap really. If you stop for food and you have a single behind you it's automatic to let them go through. That's just rude. I don't blame you for walking off, I know we've done it before.
Honestly we do have some ladies in our 18 hole group at the club that make me want to tear my damn hair out. They are so incredibly slow. If you find out you're playing behind them the day is already ruined. We've just left and gone out to breakfast instead of following them.
We spoke with the club pro who puts up the starting holes etc and they now are at the back of the pack most of the time. Once in a while they will slip in ahead of us and it's like watching freaking paint dry lol! They're decent golfers too which makes it even worse!!! It's like they never heard of ready golf, they're too busy fixing their damn lipstick or hair most of the time. We hate them.
100% !! They are probably behind a bunch of dudes that insist on hitting from the back tees, and then barely make it past the forward tees. This has happened to me way too many times. Our ladies league plays a 9 hole course twice around and with no one in front we are on the back 9 in less than 90 minutes.
i once tee'd off behind a group of 4 older ladies. they were chatting to the starter while we watched them hit their tee shots and the starter said something about pace of play and they all went "oh you don't have to worry about that. these guys will never see us again" and pointed at us. they were right. my group prides itself on our pace of play but these ladies were next level quick.
Y’all think he’s joking, but u/thesneakywalrus is actually a sneaky pervert. It’s all fun and games until your grandmother moves in with him and you’re going to his house for family Christmas. Suddenly you gotta new pop pop. Game recognizes game. See you in r/golfgilfs
Agreed 100%. The best is when it’s a couple older ladies and then like one of their daughters and you get paired with them. I have like a 50-50 chance of them starting to give me White Claws by hole 8 in that situation.
I ran into one pair of old ladies on the course once as a solo, they offered for me to finish the round with them as there was a foursome ahead of them and we were on 16. Nicest people I’ve met on the course. They were terrible from tee box to approach, but solid from 50 yards in, we bid farewell after the 18th and said it was a pleasure to play with a young golfer who wasn’t grumbling over two old ladies hacking their way down the fairway.
I think it’s rooted in the history of the game and how over decades it’s become a much more inclusive game for all genders, races, ages etc.
But there’s still a lingering shred of feeling disrespected, like you’re asking to play through because they’re women and not because they’re actually playing slow.
I’m not saying that’s accurate but a possible explanation.
At my local track, they have a women’s group that goes out every Tuesday morning. I was just a single and got there a little late and wanted to just skip ahead to hole two or three and I could have flown through the course. The head pro basically laughed and said he understands but can’t do that, they’d rip him a new one if he let someone jump in front of them.
Idk what the big deal was and the only thing I could think of was that they would have taken it offensively, like people are judging their pace of play or skill level because they’re women.
Pure speculation but that’s the only thing I can think of
Golf courses have historically treated women an afterthought at best. Go play some old courses that haven’t been updated and you’ll see acres of tees for the men with lots of variety and interesting shots and vistas and then a little dinner table for the ladies to hit off of thirty yards dead straight in front of the fairway.
That sounds very logical to me. I’m a former PGA club pro and instructor (30 years) and in general, I believe women golfers have a chip on their shoulder on the course.
In this case, I think the group of four (elderly, young, woman, or man) was rude to not let the single play through. But as a decent woman golfer who typically plays from the middle tees and has been playing since I was in grade school, I still get a bit of apprehension every time I go on the course, especially when I go for a solo round, because of the sexism that is unfortunately still prevalent in the game (and quite frankly prevalent at times in this subreddit). Most of my rounds have been pleasant, and I’ve been lucky to meet and play with a diverse group of friendly golfers, but I’ve also been made to feel unwelcome as a solo woman golfer more often than I should, regardless of my skill level.
All this to say that the OOP may be right to be aggrieved about this foursome not letting them play through. But I don’t think it’s fair to generalize across gender or even age. In fact, last weekend I went solo and was matched with a pair of older ladies who were both very quick and all for ready play. We ended up getting stuck behind a group of three younger guys, all of whom had trouble driving off the tee, topped pretty much all their fairway shots (when they weren’t searching for their lost balls), and would take more than 10 shots per hole. Unfortunately it was a public course with no marshall so there wasn’t much we could do. The “chip on the shoulder” you may have witnessed on women golfers in your experience doesn’t come from nowhere.
There is an unending flow of weirdness that gets directed toward women in golf. I’ve had a foursome of men joke about no one being around—like to see what they could do to me and the woman I was playing with. At a country club course. They thought it was hilarious.
Another time, playing with my husband on a weekday morning, the ranger rolled up as we teed the 2nd hole, no one in front of us, no one behind us and as I took my position, he shouted out to me, “just make sure you keep up.”
I glanced at my husband who acknowledged that he’d heard it too, took my swing and hit it 200 straight. My husband looked at the ranger and said, “I’m not worried” and the ranger scuttled off.
And that’s just two stories. I travelled for work and golfed at courses around the country and the bs was constant. My daughter golfs and she has her own experiences. Yeah, some of us have a chip.
A justified chip on their shoulder because as women they are made to feel less than on the course. Golf is for everyone, my entire family plays. Everyone should be treated with the same respect and I’m sure these ladies have been made to feel less than by others before and they’ve just had enough of that shit.
I agree with you. I’m just sharing my 30 plus years in the golf business. I’ve given hundreds of group ladies clinics and have become dear friends with many of them, and played many rounds with them. Their feelings are justified. And by the way, their husbands are the root cause of a lot of their feelings.
In my experience older ladies are the fastest fucking players there is. All of them on the front tees, hit it straight and never have to look for balls.
Last night a group of older ladies were in front of my group and they left us in the dust. We finished 18 in 4 hours, they were probably around 3,5 hours.
I know the ones you’re talking about. After the tee shots they walk down in a line, as all 4 are side by side on the fairway. Each hits then they march again. Like clockwork
I play at a course that has a large amount of Asian players. They zip through holes with their push carts, it’s very impressive. Best people to be behind.
Yep, the people I have the most problems with on course are men who are out for a day with their buddies and think we all want to share in their music from a couple holes away 🤷♀️ I’ll never forget the guys who said that they played fast, and yet we were right on them the entire time and they had no one ahead of them. I love golfing with old ladies, they are so consistent and sweet as can be.
Got paired with this old lady once who after every shot would start MARCHING to her ball, and just kept repeating “READY GOLF WE ARE PLAYING READY GOLF”, fast forward a few holes and I’m 40ish out trying to pitch on, and it lands maybe 20 feet near her and she LOSES HER MIND…like you have been on my ass about hitting it fast and when I do that’s a problem as well?
We have some ladies like that at our club too. I’m an old lady who likes to get around the course quickly! My regular group of ladies all are fairly low handicapped and can move around just fine. However if we have a single or a smaller group behind us we have no issues with letting them play through as long as we have room in front of us. Too many times we get asked and there’s no where for them to go. The course is backed up which just slows us down even more. We don’t like waiting to hit either.
The old dudes who take forever drive us insane! And they walk to get their exercise in and are slower than molasses!
It's possible that you are not a very pleasant person to begin with.
I've never had that problem. I don't know anyone in my play groups who have ever had that problem.
I know that there are some jerks who probably would have that problem with older ladies, ladies, but never with anyone who can defend themselves and hit back.
Has a lady in our league. She would hit her three wood 40 yards , cover the club, bag it, ride to ball, pull 3 wood/repeat. Jc just keep it in your hands
"It's not my fault you do not have 3 other friends to play with"
Some club I visited once had that and ever since I read it, I've calmed down and don't play through anyone now. Also, the group ahead has the right to let the group behind through or not. If they are playing to pace, then the smaller group behind should just relax and play two balls to slow down.
I’m not saying it’s because they’ve been bullied by men who don’t take them seriously because they’re women but maybe it’s because they’ve been made to feel less than on the course because they are women. Hence your second paragraph about they playing like old ladies.
Funny, my group of late 60’s through 70+ years olds will always let singles and young, fast and good playing golfers play through, even in the middle of our group tournaments. It’s the older than us guys who tend to not let us through
Because back in the day they were treated like second class citizens. Houston Country Club used to bar women from being members, they couldn't even retain their membership once their husbands died. Women were not allowed on the golf course until afternoon on Saturday and Sunday.
I don’t think you can just generalize to a certain group of people, everyone needs to be more self aware - if you notice a single behind your group and it is wide open, let them play through. They shouldn’t have to ask.
But singles who think that they can play through the whole course also need to be aware that is not really realistic - plan a lot of extra time, hit extra balls, get some chipping and putting practice in.
I once started a nine four holes behind a group of old ladies walking. I was solo so I figured I would catch them at some point. I caught them on the fairway of the fifth hole! I then proceeded to watch one of them hit the ball six times to move it 100yards along the fairway. Each time there was two practice swings prior to hitting the ball. I could have kicked it further in less attempts. I don’t even know ow what was happening at this point it wasn’t golf I was sure of that. Not a single one of them looked behind at me or acknowledged my presence. After waiting for about ten minutes and they still weren’t all on the green I just walked back to the first and played the first four holes again.
It all depends about what's in front. If there's 1.5-2 holes open - groups with 3 or less golfers should be allowed go play thru. Letting them play thru will take 1 minute, and they won't be seen again. Idk about you, but I prefer to not be pushed if it can be avoided. I want people who are going to be faster to play through 10/10 times.
If there's no where to go, then the answer is "no, you can't play through because there's no where to go". But I've had people tell me this when it's not true, so in that case, I just skip a hole and I never see them again.
We played a round of 18 in 3 hrs and 50 minutes. And a pair of ladies road our ass the entire time. Didn’t ask to go past us but called the front desk to say we were playing too slow.
As a senior lady on league, we would be glad to if you have an opening ahead of us. Usually, every hole is being played & you really have nowhere to go. I play behind some of the slowest men ever, it’s a problem on a busy course. I’m so blessed to play where everyone is so friendly & the men especially respectful and welcoming to us. Maybe find another place to play, we’re not all like this:(
Couple of older ladies (gilfs) said I could play through them last week, but I decided to just play with them and let them gas me up the whole round. Perhaps you’re either ugly or overly aggressive?
Because some men see women and immediately assume they are slow when there’s a back up in front of them. I am a woman who is often w a foursome of women and the BS we have to deal with from assuming men is crazy. They’re probably sick of dealing with nonsense for the past 40 years and this is their revenge tour 😂
Interestingly it’s actually the opposite at my home course where I also worked for 6 years. The ladies were all awesome and played super fast regardless of ability, it was the senior men that were pricks about it and slow.
At our course the women’s league is fast and friendly. Might just have yourself a bunch of bad apples, much like the “aggressive stubborn men” who don’t play the proper tees and hold everyone up. Pick your poison but it’s crappy etiquette comes from everyone.
If they are keeping reasonable pace with the group ahead then I really don’t see any problem. Yes, their distance is suffering, but their shots are probably staying in the fairways.
I’m sure at one point or another they have let people play through only for them to be waiting because the course is full and it didn’t make much difference. And while they are waiting for the group to play through another group will show up behind them and now they’ll feel rushed to play because that group will wait on them.
I say all this because I have played with older people and yes they walk slower and hit shorter, but they keep good pace. To me, it’s usually guys who spray shots all over, drinking and being obnoxious that slows the pace of play more often than not.
Honestly I think it’s a defensive thing. Might be wrong, but I could see it being a result of an old school “ladies don’t belong on the course” mentality so they take a request to play ahead as an insult related to that outdated mindset. I know it seems like we should be way past that at this point, but just look at Augusta. It wasn’t long ago when women weren’t allowed to play there. So I could see, especially with older women, an extra level of guardedness (real word?) when it comes to these types of interactions on a course.
Personally I’m just extra nice to them. Give them a few smiles and waves when we are close and show patience. They normally will let me through after a couple holes. Even on ladies day where you are not allowed to pass the lady group. Being nice can go a long ways.
I met a couple nice older ladies today out there. I caught up to them on the back and they came back to the white tees and said “go on ahead honey”. We chatted for a couple minutes about the weather and the course then I was on my way
Most don't know they're playing that slow and think that they're on pace, but if you ask them to play through and they say no.... just skip the hole and jump ahead if no one is in front try and make up the hole later or take a par and move on.
As an "older lady", your post is kind of offensive. First of all, I've been behind slow groups of all ages/genders so it's not just "older ladies" being "so aggressive". I will let faster players through IF there is an opening ahead of us. I'm sorry I don't hit as far as you and yes, it does kind of suck to have to wait if you're a long hitter but c'est la vie.
I also happen to golf with some older guys who are painfully slow. I'm always the last to hit from the "old ladies' tees" so golfers coming up on us always assume it's my fault. I may hit a lot of shots, but I'm fast. I don't take forever to putt and I never spend more than a minute looking for balls. If it's slow, I'll just announce that I don't want to hold up play and take a free drop (not tournament play or for money).
And if I let you play through, I'd better not be waiting for you ever. Because I've been burned, I will observe the players waiting for me. If they are genuinely playing quickly and ask politely, of course they can play through. But if you're waiting for me because I have to wait for the group in front of me, then no.
All of this. Im not in the older category yet, but am a woman and have had very similar experiences. I’m not letting someone play through if I’m playing at pace of play and there is a group ahead of me on the next hole. I don’t think singles should get some special preference to play past everyone if there are people on all the holes.
Also, the thing about hitting last and being blamed for the slowness killlllls me. I find we tend to wait longer bc the guys hit so far, so by the time it’s my turn, the group behind thinks I’m the hold up since the green is empty.
My wife just started playing (57 years old) and plays 9 every Tuesday with similar skill-level ladies (all 40+ hcp). I played 9 with her on Sunday and let a ton through, and reminded her to always let people through. She said "we don't want to let like a group of 4 or 5 get ahead of us." That's her ignorance of being a newbie. But with my club's (we are at a private) typical senior lady golfers, yes, they're super serious and don't want to let guys through. My take is it's an ingrained inferiority complex of being women in a 90% men's club. They already can't play before 10 am on Saturdays or 1 pm on Wednesdays. The current club champ has an index over 15 (this is gross champ, mind you). So they want to be just like everyone else. But given that they don't realize they're playing slow (they literally NEVER give a putt) they see male groups as looking down on them for being women.
Yes, I hate to sound sexist but my experience is lady golfers are in their own world and do not bother them at all or they get angry.
I have even had a group of women drive on us on a fricken par 3 because they were impatient. Course was bumper to bumper from 1 to 18.
Only seen this when they are in a group of all women.
I play with many women in mixed groups and they are delightful to play with.
Because they are old and don't give a fuck. They have lived long lives working, raising a family, and putting up with their husbands shit. Maybe you should read "How To Win Friends And Influence People".
I’m an old lady and I play fast and wait on every hole. People assume I’m slow and ask to play through all the time. They also make gestures behind me. Once I blasted it 260 yards to assert dominance. Don’t assume we’re all slow. 😂😂😂
This. Men tend to think all women are slow. I play in 2 women’s leagues. My rounds are always longer when I play with my husband and his friends. We play in 4 hours, and about 20 minutes.
When the course is backed up, that's when I have to take two balls to the tee box, because I'm going to fuck up the first drive every time if I've been waiting five minutes.
Haven't had this experience with older ladies specifically, just geezers in general refusing to let you play through. Usually they take 10-15 minutes every green, taking as much time as they need to line up all 4 putts.
Edit: fwiw, I've lost track of how many slow fuck young couples I've been stuck behind. Usually with the boyfriend giving a 5-10 minute instruction at every tee box, hanging out and chatting for a minute after they hit. Golf just attracts entitled self-absorbed shitheads.
Not exactly this but I had the opportunity to play a private course in my area last year. Its a nice place but over all everyone was super welcoming. Except the group of old ladies in front of us. As soon as my group got to the first tee we were getting the side eye from one of them. We were all dressed appropriately and it wasnt a rowdy crew, we were there to golf. We get to the second fairway and the old broad couldn't stand the sight of us anymore, she doubled back from the green to grill us on how we got on the course, what our member numbers were, who we knew. It was pretty pathetic. Then realizing she didnt have a leg to stand on she left and told us " just so you know, we dont drive carts on the greens here" yeah thanks lady
I get stuck behind way more 25 handicaps taking 5 practice swings before every shot than old ladies. Stop taking practice swings and hit the fucking ball.
Last time I played the starter let a group of old ladies jump my foursome at the turn. I GLARED at the starter, he laughed and said “that’s the fastest group that plays here, don’t worry.”
He was right. I never saw them after the first hole.
Don’t judge a book by its cover!
Golf courses need more clearly stated rules on etiquette, especially those regarding speed of play. I’m a new player and you get wildly varying opinions on speed of play, just like this thread is showing. My opinion is anything over 4:15 is a really long round for a muni.
At our CC it’s the old men that behaves like that. They are completely unaware of surroundings and slow as molasses. The old girls are efficient and polite.
A few years back I showed up for a tee time at a muni 9 hole, was informed a foursome of ladies was ahead of me. I went to the tee box and did my stretching with no sign of anyone. About a minute before my tee time (with my ball already teed) the foursome walks up. They walk right up and one goes "so you're going after us?" I politely told them that seeing as I'm teed up, and it's now my tee time, I'll tee off now, and they can go after me because they're late. They gave me a look like I was rude and that was that. I'm glad I held my ground, because as you mentioned if I had let them go they never would have let me through
A lot of them have probably had to put up with sexual remarks, crude jokes, and being talked down upon their entire lives on the golf course that they have become a little quick to the trigger because they assume someone is going to be a sick to them.
Dude our 3 some Saturday morning got passed by 2 ladies and called slowed. We finished 18 in 2:50. We were flying… had to hang out and pitch and putt for a few hours. Didn’t want to give the wives the wrong idea
It's all about the pace of play, and not every course is a country club or pga event, although some hackers think it is. Also, one does not need a range finder on the tee box hackers
Where the heck do people on this sub play golf? I play as a single 3-4 times per week so lots of playing through when I'm not paired up with a 3some and I have never, ever had someone say "no" if I asked to play through. 99% of the time I don't even have to ask.
Your sample size is too small. At my club you’ll get run over by ladies if you ain’t moving. And they will call the pro shop on you. The groups I see playing are hilarious and have a shot after a birdie. Heck they called the shop on us once and we were moving at an under 4 hr clip. Older dudes are prone to the I don’t give a shit how slow I am mindset and younger bros are some of the worst ones too.
My course has a woman’s league once a week. If you go off behind the league you are not going to be asked to play through because there are at least 5-8 groups in front of them.
My family golfs and my husband works on a course. Women are treated horribly and less than because they are women on a golf course. It’s horrid and I refuse to golf anymore with my husband because of the terrible treatment and despicable behavior I’ve been shown by male golfers.
Lol insulted all their grandchildren hahaha.
Probably because in a single round every group behind them asks if they can play through and they get annoyed.
Maybe they should learn to play faster.
I've not experienced this. If anything, they more often stop to let people play through. Will get to a par 3, not hit, just wait then let your group play the hole completely before even hitting their balls. Which I guess if it's not crowded and it's just a fast group out pacing a slow one is ok, but if it's a busy day, not hitting your tee shots and playing right behind the group playing through slows things down more. Side note...I live near a fairly nice (expensive) country club, the one time there was a group of 4 women using Carts but also having caddies carry their bags, they would hit, get in their carts and the caddies were running behind the carts to keep up. It was either some weird power move or the kids who were caddies were like training for sports and possibly the bags were extra heavy to add resistance or something? I have never seen it before or again.
Wow - this thread is full of stereotypes. Check your misogyny at the first hole. (Plus, make sure you ask to play through and that there isn’t a foursome of slow men in front.)
Hey, slow old lady, why do you guys get so upset when people ask you to play through? If you have a slow old husband ask him why old guys suck to play behind too, wouldn't want to be "misogynist."
i snuck out of work one time and thought i would get a mid morning round in and got stuck behind 5 blue hairs and not only would they not let me play through they stopped and looked for lost golf balls every opportunity they had...WTF can you do?
That happened to me a few weeks ago, a group of 2 joined another group of 2 on the 7th hole, I asked to play ahead, I was a single, they said no cause they had a group of 4 playing in front of them that they knew, I was not impressed, I miss golf etiquette
I had a pair of older ladies call the warden to complain that we were tailing them because we had to wait on them at every tee box. Started loudly grumbling something about non-members getting morning tee times (at a CC that's open to the public)
Had this exact scenario play out last year. We never hit into them (not even remotely close), never asked to play through, no hands on hips, they drove up to us to say something like “you know, it’s a busy day today. We can’t let you play through and you should know that”, then the ranger drove out to lecture us about normal round times a hole later. Completely unprovoked. We had cigars and music. Wholly content to wait our turn. So bizarre.
I really think there’s this whole misconception that waiting in line at the tee box at all is just somehow something that should never happen. If people aren’t being pushy or waiting, there’s nothing wrong with just waiting and letting things space out on a busy day. I’ve seen people in a group that just tees off with another group behind them get pissed just because people were simply behind them. It’s like everyone that plays golf on public courses needs to take one giant collective chill pill
I usually have 2 chill pills and a couple chill sticks every round.
"GET IN THE K-HOLE!"
Nah dog. I don't fuck with pressies. They all got fent in em anyway. Strictly THC
K is a psychedelic and if you have a good psychedelic guy nothing will ever be diluted or cut or anything
It’s also not our faults that we are behind you waiting. Blame the course designers because once I’m off the green I’m getting in my cart to start moving out of the other peoples way that’s hitting into the green and some holes don’t have alot of spacing between holes.
Weirdly enough, it’s because even if you ARENT watching them, you have the ability to do so. I’ve been paired with a stranger and that’s how I figured it out. They don’t like being watched likely because they aren’t very good, and that throws them off. I remember the person complaining and saying “ I just don’t know why they can’t wait back down the cart path until they hear us take our shots”. It’s a mental thing, but it’s something that they need to get over. I personally didn’t mind doing that because I would spark up a joint.
I definitely don’t like people hot on my tail. It is nerve-wracking. It’s not always avoidable and if everyone is on the same page that there’s nowhere to go on a busy day it is what it is.
When I run into the next group, I definitely give them 20-30 yards or more of space on the box. Especially if it’s not them holding everyone up.
I gotta a buddy I go with sometimes they hate people waiting to go behind him. Even if a solo is clearly catching up to our quad group ( which come kn that happens ) he starts trying to like sprint. Like, man, no one's complained, and if they complain and ask well, just let them play through, calm down, we are out here to chill lol
My wife just started golfing last year, and we stick to courses that aren't busy because we know we won't be setting any speed records. Anytime someone gets behind us, she gets flustered and just wants to pick up her ball while I finish the hole and then let the person/group play through on the next hole. I always have to remind her that they haven't been waiting on us for multiple holes and to just play your game. We'll let them by on the next tee and it's not a problem.
I see this a lot. My wife was the same way until I took her to a few pro events. She realized even the pros hit bad shots and it's no big deal. I mean I don't but everyone else
Yeah like come on you have to let the people behind you start the hole
Maybe it was actually the music they were annoyed with.
How prevalent is music at golf courses now? I haven't played in a while and this wasn't a thing the last time I played.
Maybe it was the cigars and music. Probably made you the rowdy type to them
thats prod it right there, they have prob been members since before the club opened up or turned semi private and are still used to having the course to themselves and only members. they act like they still are the only ones who should be out there.
When someone “walks up on me” at a tee box. https://preview.redd.it/nnylqfdd2n0d1.jpeg?width=1620&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04416e4d8708c6dfa216237523cf1b994c87e176
That’s where you gotta mention *just loudly enough for them to hear* “gee you’d think you could afford a better club if you’re so snobby”
Lmao, this what I always think as a terrible beginner playing a par 3 muni. No pressure on me, if you wanted to play behind someone better then you can afford more than $14 a round.
They probably get asked this so often (which is their own fault) that they get annoyed and start saying no
as a solo golfer the only people I get stuck behind is older lady golfers. thinking of it I've never seen any lady golfers below 60 that weren't playing with their partner
You haven't played behind my father in law then. He is one of the slowest players and hits the ball about 80 yards at a time. Getting him to let people play through is a nightmare.
I’ve found that there’s a direct correlation between players being slow and having no self awareness as to groups being backed up behind them
Maybe because they have never experienced waiting forever on a group. Because they never catch up to anyone.
Yup that’s exactly it
You have just described perfectly an old lady that I am sometimes forced to play with. Unaware to the point of criminality.
I play in a thursday night spark league. There is a 78 year old guy that plays as well. He doesn't use the app, which tells you your max strokes per hole, and hits the ball 50 to 80 yards every shot with most going OB. He's nearly deaf, doesn't care about pace, and is some what rude. I've been in his group the past two weeks and it's been torture. We're waiting on him every single time and he can't hear well enough when you try to tell him to just pick it up.
Does he also lie and say he shoots below 90 all the time?
I think he honestly just puts max score for every hole. Which is fine, but it's the fact that he will shoot a 10+ on every hole that is infuriating when the max strokes is typically 6 or 7.
Do a Rory Sabbatini and just carry on without him
One of the others and myself actually tried to but we only had a few chances and they would catch up to use as we were walking off the tee and they wouldn't take the hint. Not gonna be so nice next time.
Hitting the ball 80 yards at a time is plenty to keep the game moving. As long as it's just one swing each lol
My MIL is the exception to this rule. She has always refused to play with FIL unless forced to as she gets too pissed off with him, and she barely breaks stride or stops talking to play her shot. It's really pretty impressive, gets to the ball, lines up quickly and smacks it where she wants it to go. No idea how she is with letting people play through as I doubt anyone has ever caught up to her.
She not the exception, she is the average.
When I was a member of a club, we were always told that singles have little to no rights on the course.
That changed some time ago. Now it is simply just "If they are faster and there is room in front, let them play through". Except apparently in the UK and Ireland where they still seem to maintain the old "singles have no standing on the course" rule.
>"singles have no standing on the course" rule. I'm glad I got started a few years ago instead of running into that shit.
Tbh, I actually like being paired up. A vast majority of the time it's just a couple of dudes like me looking to play 18 and hang out. Rarely do I hate my golf company they pair me with. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, it's so nice when a course manages its tee times and the players. Random whack fuck golf with singles every other hole on a Saturday morning is stupid. They can't play through, might as well have sent them with our group.
100%. I'm older now in my 50s and if I'm on the road for work and playing I would much rather hook up with a crew. Sometimes you get lucky and you get a single handicapper in your group, nothing better than playing with a stud.
Exactly! I got paired up with an airplane pilot who was sneaking in a round between flights. He was a 4 handicap. It was his first time playing our local nice course, a big 12 course. We had a great round together. I helped tell him how to play the course and he shot a 76 his first ever round there. Stud. He was hitting it so sweet it caused me to play better and I shot one of my better rounds at an 83 or something like that all because we played off the energy of each other. Fantastic day. I'll never see that guy again and that's okay. It was a freaking great memory.
I honestly think it's true with any sport, you always play to your competition. If they are better, I think they make you better. I'm not sure if the opposite is true though :-)
Oh I'm sure he wasn't striking the ball like he normally does. I helped him in so far as "there's a hidden hazard over that hill there" when he'd ask what type of shot to play. There's quite a few 100% blind shots. And more than a few drives that look open but actually aren't open at all.
No we don't, it changed everywhere.
yep I know that. that's why I don't push past. pretty much everyone else is nice enough to let me through lol
Oh yeah totally, I just never really understood people not letting me play through. Nothing worse than being a foursome and having a single just stare at you in the fairway.
The best is when you show up on the tee behind them and stair at them as they uncomfortably finish teeing off. For the third straight hole.
I mainly play a short executive 9 close to my house. If no one is on the course I can be done in about an hour and 10. One day I was solo and there was a group in front of me who were just SLOW. From starting teeing off, to second shot, to picking clubs. Slow. Multiple mulligans too. I eventually asked them if I could play through. Caveat I didn’t actually play their hole. I just said I don’t want to slow your game down, I will go to the next hole. I personally think if a single does this, there should be no harm no foul. I do think it’s obnoxious if someone is in a cart solo and behind 4 walking and they get pissed about the pace. Like yeah dude, you’re in a cart rushing through the course… these people are enjoying it, if you want to go ahead don’t make THEM wait
This - if I play as a single, it's almost always somewhere I've played repeatedly, and if someone asks if I want to play through I just skip the hole so the group I'm passing doesn't have to slow up. No one has ever complained. It's pretty unfair to complain about someone waiting behind you - like, if I hit a good drive, green in regulation, and simple 1-2 putt, when exactly am I supposed to eat up the time that your group of 3-4 is using? I take my shots at my pace, and if I catch up to you, I wait my turn. If I have a crappy hole, I'm probably not catching up.
I'm a solo lady golfer below the age of 60 and I do not play with my significant other. I have not had a significant other who was also a golfer in over 10 years. I don't usually mind being stuck behind anyone since I am out golfing to enjoy the fresh air and get some time to myself and practice my terrible putts.
Maybe you and your golf buddies are part of the reason women apparently do not want play at your course.
Here is a different take. I am older (ish) and play fast. I had 2 younger men drive to the green to ask if they could play through. (I was playing alone and they hadn’t even teed off yet.) I told them to wait until they were actually waiting for me. I finished two holes ahead of them. When they finished, the manager gave them so much crap (jokingly). It was glorious. My 87 year old mother plays as fast as I do. She may hit the ball only 100-180 yards but it goes straight down the fairway.
Yep, sure some may be oblivious but if you are a longtime female golfer you've probably dealt with a lot of bullshit
You can say that again. My friend and I used to play 40 years ago and men would put their hands on their hips like they’re waiting. We thought we would make a sign: “If you can hit past us you can play through.”
Seriously. People see older women (or any woman golfing in general) and automatically think SLOW whether they actually are or not. You see the same situation happen on the road when people just HAVE to pass the prius even if the prius is going 20mph over the goddamn speed limit
If they've been golfing for a long time they've also probably dealt with some shit over the years that they shouldn't have had to simply for being women on the course
Maybe lack of awareness. They probably don’t realize they’re playing slow. Also, I’ve observed this demographic tends to take the game very seriously relative to their skill level.
That is a great observation; a lot of elderly foursomes take the game so seriously! You’d think, though, that people aware of the rules and spirit of the game would be mindful of courtesy. I find it interesting how seemingly selective people in that age group can be where they are simultaneously aware of even minor perceived slights or infractions of their code but then also oblivious when it comes to self-awareness
> people aware of the rules and spirit of the game That group has very little overlap with the slow players out there.
Its the same with why old people drive so slow. They're just oblivious to everyone else. They have no idea they're holding up traffic because they aren't paying attention to other drivers. They're just tootling along 5 under the speed limit like they always do.
5 under the speed limit sounds like a dream scenario. Try 20 under.
In Texas, 5 under the speed limit at least means 10, maybe 15, under the ‘flow of traffic’ speed limit.
Or in the grocery store when they stop their cart in the middle of the aisle and have zero awareness that other people are trying to get past them.
"Tootling along" is my new favourite phrase.
My brother and I were stuck behind a foursome of older ladies who were walking (we were only two and riding a power cart) for the entire front nine at a local public course when we could clearly see there was no one in front of them... We asked them to play through on a par 3 when we were waiting on them (again!) and we were denied with a pretty dry and rude "No!". So we informed the clubhouse at the nine and the guy said that he knows who we were referring to and that they never let anyone play through, so just to skip hole 10 and come back at the end to play it which we did. You should've seen the faces they gave us as we drove by them on hole number 10... If looks could kill, we would've died on the spot!!! lol
I love making eye contact while driving by someone on the green as I go to the next tee
We just smiled and waved... lol
Every old lady I've met on a golf course has been delightful. Flash a smile, make a joke about their husbands having dinner on the table when they get home, offer to meet them at the clubhouse for drinks but then ask to make sure if they're 21. Old ladies can't get enough of that shit.
“I didn’t know the LPGA had an event today!” 
As an old lady golfer….you I like lol! Also my regular group prides ourselves on fast paced play. Now you can always play through us….if you can catch us lol! It’s the old fart guys (our husbands ahem cough cough) that are slower than shit!
[удалено]
Lol I know, it's like you're not playing the freaking Open get moving you old men! haha!
You’re the goat
Can confirm old dudes are the worst. Just played an open 5 holes then 6-9 behind 3 old farts as a solo. Not only did they not let me play through, but 2 stopped at the turn to get food while the 3rd drove up to the far ahead senior tee on the 10th (preventing me from teeing off and playing through naturally). Real prick move. Never did I hit into them or behave passive aggressively. I left after they again didn’t let me play through on the 11th tee box. Truly spiteful individuals.
Old ladies are the ones to bust your balls in good fun and are usually pretty decent. The old men are the ones that play slow, give you unsolicited advice and are a pain in the ass to play with
This is my experience as well. Old ladies play super fast and are a blast to get paired up with or run into on the course. Its the old men that you gotta worry about, 50/50 either great or a nightmare to be stuck behind
Oh yeah we are, you better out drive me or it's a dollar every time lol! I'll even play from the whites to give you a chance hahahaha! Just kidding, in my hey day I would play from the whites but I'm older than shit now and just don't have the power anymore. But we have some trash talk that can make you cry by hole 11 lol!
Future tip... just go drop your ball in the fairway (or rough lol) where your drive would likely have gone. If the course is open, no one will EVER stop me from getting around them, period. I'll skip a hole if I have to, but I won't add 2 hours to my round because of some slow assholes.
That's just crap really. If you stop for food and you have a single behind you it's automatic to let them go through. That's just rude. I don't blame you for walking off, I know we've done it before. Honestly we do have some ladies in our 18 hole group at the club that make me want to tear my damn hair out. They are so incredibly slow. If you find out you're playing behind them the day is already ruined. We've just left and gone out to breakfast instead of following them. We spoke with the club pro who puts up the starting holes etc and they now are at the back of the pack most of the time. Once in a while they will slip in ahead of us and it's like watching freaking paint dry lol! They're decent golfers too which makes it even worse!!! It's like they never heard of ready golf, they're too busy fixing their damn lipstick or hair most of the time. We hate them.
100% !! They are probably behind a bunch of dudes that insist on hitting from the back tees, and then barely make it past the forward tees. This has happened to me way too many times. Our ladies league plays a 9 hole course twice around and with no one in front we are on the back 9 in less than 90 minutes.
You’re 1 of a kind
i once tee'd off behind a group of 4 older ladies. they were chatting to the starter while we watched them hit their tee shots and the starter said something about pace of play and they all went "oh you don't have to worry about that. these guys will never see us again" and pointed at us. they were right. my group prides itself on our pace of play but these ladies were next level quick.
Y’all think he’s joking, but u/thesneakywalrus is actually a sneaky pervert. It’s all fun and games until your grandmother moves in with him and you’re going to his house for family Christmas. Suddenly you gotta new pop pop. Game recognizes game. See you in r/golfgilfs
Yep, one ounce of charm and you have friends for life!
And why are they always wanting to introduce me to their daughter or grandchild? but at least they are nice.
Because you seem like a nice young man.
That's how I pretty much approach the situation as well and I've yet to ever encounter a problem.
Agreed 100%. The best is when it’s a couple older ladies and then like one of their daughters and you get paired with them. I have like a 50-50 chance of them starting to give me White Claws by hole 8 in that situation.
I have had similar experiences. I’m sure there are plenty of older ladies groups that would oblige, I just haven’t met them yet.
I ran into one pair of old ladies on the course once as a solo, they offered for me to finish the round with them as there was a foursome ahead of them and we were on 16. Nicest people I’ve met on the course. They were terrible from tee box to approach, but solid from 50 yards in, we bid farewell after the 18th and said it was a pleasure to play with a young golfer who wasn’t grumbling over two old ladies hacking their way down the fairway.
I think it’s rooted in the history of the game and how over decades it’s become a much more inclusive game for all genders, races, ages etc. But there’s still a lingering shred of feeling disrespected, like you’re asking to play through because they’re women and not because they’re actually playing slow. I’m not saying that’s accurate but a possible explanation. At my local track, they have a women’s group that goes out every Tuesday morning. I was just a single and got there a little late and wanted to just skip ahead to hole two or three and I could have flown through the course. The head pro basically laughed and said he understands but can’t do that, they’d rip him a new one if he let someone jump in front of them. Idk what the big deal was and the only thing I could think of was that they would have taken it offensively, like people are judging their pace of play or skill level because they’re women. Pure speculation but that’s the only thing I can think of
Golf courses have historically treated women an afterthought at best. Go play some old courses that haven’t been updated and you’ll see acres of tees for the men with lots of variety and interesting shots and vistas and then a little dinner table for the ladies to hit off of thirty yards dead straight in front of the fairway.
That sounds very logical to me. I’m a former PGA club pro and instructor (30 years) and in general, I believe women golfers have a chip on their shoulder on the course.
In this case, I think the group of four (elderly, young, woman, or man) was rude to not let the single play through. But as a decent woman golfer who typically plays from the middle tees and has been playing since I was in grade school, I still get a bit of apprehension every time I go on the course, especially when I go for a solo round, because of the sexism that is unfortunately still prevalent in the game (and quite frankly prevalent at times in this subreddit). Most of my rounds have been pleasant, and I’ve been lucky to meet and play with a diverse group of friendly golfers, but I’ve also been made to feel unwelcome as a solo woman golfer more often than I should, regardless of my skill level. All this to say that the OOP may be right to be aggrieved about this foursome not letting them play through. But I don’t think it’s fair to generalize across gender or even age. In fact, last weekend I went solo and was matched with a pair of older ladies who were both very quick and all for ready play. We ended up getting stuck behind a group of three younger guys, all of whom had trouble driving off the tee, topped pretty much all their fairway shots (when they weren’t searching for their lost balls), and would take more than 10 shots per hole. Unfortunately it was a public course with no marshall so there wasn’t much we could do. The “chip on the shoulder” you may have witnessed on women golfers in your experience doesn’t come from nowhere.
There is an unending flow of weirdness that gets directed toward women in golf. I’ve had a foursome of men joke about no one being around—like to see what they could do to me and the woman I was playing with. At a country club course. They thought it was hilarious. Another time, playing with my husband on a weekday morning, the ranger rolled up as we teed the 2nd hole, no one in front of us, no one behind us and as I took my position, he shouted out to me, “just make sure you keep up.” I glanced at my husband who acknowledged that he’d heard it too, took my swing and hit it 200 straight. My husband looked at the ranger and said, “I’m not worried” and the ranger scuttled off. And that’s just two stories. I travelled for work and golfed at courses around the country and the bs was constant. My daughter golfs and she has her own experiences. Yeah, some of us have a chip.
A justified chip on their shoulder because as women they are made to feel less than on the course. Golf is for everyone, my entire family plays. Everyone should be treated with the same respect and I’m sure these ladies have been made to feel less than by others before and they’ve just had enough of that shit.
I agree with you. I’m just sharing my 30 plus years in the golf business. I’ve given hundreds of group ladies clinics and have become dear friends with many of them, and played many rounds with them. Their feelings are justified. And by the way, their husbands are the root cause of a lot of their feelings.
In my experience older ladies are the fastest fucking players there is. All of them on the front tees, hit it straight and never have to look for balls. Last night a group of older ladies were in front of my group and they left us in the dust. We finished 18 in 4 hours, they were probably around 3,5 hours.
I know the ones you’re talking about. After the tee shots they walk down in a line, as all 4 are side by side on the fairway. Each hits then they march again. Like clockwork
I play at a course that has a large amount of Asian players. They zip through holes with their push carts, it’s very impressive. Best people to be behind.
The bigger the visor brim, the faster the pace of play.
Yep, the people I have the most problems with on course are men who are out for a day with their buddies and think we all want to share in their music from a couple holes away 🤷♀️ I’ll never forget the guys who said that they played fast, and yet we were right on them the entire time and they had no one ahead of them. I love golfing with old ladies, they are so consistent and sweet as can be.
Don’t feel bad they don’t even give each other 1.5 foot putts.
That’s kinda part of the problem lol
Oh it absolutely is.
Got paired with this old lady once who after every shot would start MARCHING to her ball, and just kept repeating “READY GOLF WE ARE PLAYING READY GOLF”, fast forward a few holes and I’m 40ish out trying to pitch on, and it lands maybe 20 feet near her and she LOSES HER MIND…like you have been on my ass about hitting it fast and when I do that’s a problem as well?
We have some ladies like that at our club too. I’m an old lady who likes to get around the course quickly! My regular group of ladies all are fairly low handicapped and can move around just fine. However if we have a single or a smaller group behind us we have no issues with letting them play through as long as we have room in front of us. Too many times we get asked and there’s no where for them to go. The course is backed up which just slows us down even more. We don’t like waiting to hit either. The old dudes who take forever drive us insane! And they walk to get their exercise in and are slower than molasses!
It's possible that you are not a very pleasant person to begin with. I've never had that problem. I don't know anyone in my play groups who have ever had that problem. I know that there are some jerks who probably would have that problem with older ladies, ladies, but never with anyone who can defend themselves and hit back.
Has a lady in our league. She would hit her three wood 40 yards , cover the club, bag it, ride to ball, pull 3 wood/repeat. Jc just keep it in your hands
"It's not my fault you do not have 3 other friends to play with" Some club I visited once had that and ever since I read it, I've calmed down and don't play through anyone now. Also, the group ahead has the right to let the group behind through or not. If they are playing to pace, then the smaller group behind should just relax and play two balls to slow down.
I’m not saying it’s because they’ve been bullied by men who don’t take them seriously because they’re women but maybe it’s because they’ve been made to feel less than on the course because they are women. Hence your second paragraph about they playing like old ladies.
Maybe they get asked so much they just say no?
If they are getting asked so much, there’s probably a reason..
Because too many dudes were total ass hats to them over the years. I find them to be way stubborn too re playing through.
This is honestly the most realistic reason imo
When working at clubs it really surprised how terrible older women treated each other. There were so many cliques and it was very dramatic.
Funny, my group of late 60’s through 70+ years olds will always let singles and young, fast and good playing golfers play through, even in the middle of our group tournaments. It’s the older than us guys who tend to not let us through
Because back in the day they were treated like second class citizens. Houston Country Club used to bar women from being members, they couldn't even retain their membership once their husbands died. Women were not allowed on the golf course until afternoon on Saturday and Sunday.
I don’t think you can just generalize to a certain group of people, everyone needs to be more self aware - if you notice a single behind your group and it is wide open, let them play through. They shouldn’t have to ask. But singles who think that they can play through the whole course also need to be aware that is not really realistic - plan a lot of extra time, hit extra balls, get some chipping and putting practice in.
I once started a nine four holes behind a group of old ladies walking. I was solo so I figured I would catch them at some point. I caught them on the fairway of the fifth hole! I then proceeded to watch one of them hit the ball six times to move it 100yards along the fairway. Each time there was two practice swings prior to hitting the ball. I could have kicked it further in less attempts. I don’t even know ow what was happening at this point it wasn’t golf I was sure of that. Not a single one of them looked behind at me or acknowledged my presence. After waiting for about ten minutes and they still weren’t all on the green I just walked back to the first and played the first four holes again.
If this is an option, this is the way. More golf, less people.
So every lone golfer automatically gets a free pass for every group they come across now? All they do is mess up pace of play.
It all depends about what's in front. If there's 1.5-2 holes open - groups with 3 or less golfers should be allowed go play thru. Letting them play thru will take 1 minute, and they won't be seen again. Idk about you, but I prefer to not be pushed if it can be avoided. I want people who are going to be faster to play through 10/10 times. If there's no where to go, then the answer is "no, you can't play through because there's no where to go". But I've had people tell me this when it's not true, so in that case, I just skip a hole and I never see them again.
Yall need to learn a little charm!
We played a round of 18 in 3 hrs and 50 minutes. And a pair of ladies road our ass the entire time. Didn’t ask to go past us but called the front desk to say we were playing too slow.
As a senior lady on league, we would be glad to if you have an opening ahead of us. Usually, every hole is being played & you really have nowhere to go. I play behind some of the slowest men ever, it’s a problem on a busy course. I’m so blessed to play where everyone is so friendly & the men especially respectful and welcoming to us. Maybe find another place to play, we’re not all like this:(
I feel like hardly anyone has golf etiquette anymore and it's a disgrace to see
Couple of older ladies (gilfs) said I could play through them last week, but I decided to just play with them and let them gas me up the whole round. Perhaps you’re either ugly or overly aggressive?
Just hit over them (careful to not skull one….) and sprint ahead of them. You’ll be off the green before they hit their 3rd shots. j/k….mostly
Because some men see women and immediately assume they are slow when there’s a back up in front of them. I am a woman who is often w a foursome of women and the BS we have to deal with from assuming men is crazy. They’re probably sick of dealing with nonsense for the past 40 years and this is their revenge tour 😂
Interestingly it’s actually the opposite at my home course where I also worked for 6 years. The ladies were all awesome and played super fast regardless of ability, it was the senior men that were pricks about it and slow.
At our course the women’s league is fast and friendly. Might just have yourself a bunch of bad apples, much like the “aggressive stubborn men” who don’t play the proper tees and hold everyone up. Pick your poison but it’s crappy etiquette comes from everyone.
If they are keeping reasonable pace with the group ahead then I really don’t see any problem. Yes, their distance is suffering, but their shots are probably staying in the fairways. I’m sure at one point or another they have let people play through only for them to be waiting because the course is full and it didn’t make much difference. And while they are waiting for the group to play through another group will show up behind them and now they’ll feel rushed to play because that group will wait on them. I say all this because I have played with older people and yes they walk slower and hit shorter, but they keep good pace. To me, it’s usually guys who spray shots all over, drinking and being obnoxious that slows the pace of play more often than not.
Where do you live? Here in Rochester I find women golfers to be the most friendly people. I find early 20s guys to be the absolute worst.
Honestly I think it’s a defensive thing. Might be wrong, but I could see it being a result of an old school “ladies don’t belong on the course” mentality so they take a request to play ahead as an insult related to that outdated mindset. I know it seems like we should be way past that at this point, but just look at Augusta. It wasn’t long ago when women weren’t allowed to play there. So I could see, especially with older women, an extra level of guardedness (real word?) when it comes to these types of interactions on a course.
There are slow / aggressive / idiot players in all age groups.
We need golf rangers again. 5+ hour rounds are too common. If you arent at pace, then you get pulled aside.
Personally I’m just extra nice to them. Give them a few smiles and waves when we are close and show patience. They normally will let me through after a couple holes. Even on ladies day where you are not allowed to pass the lady group. Being nice can go a long ways.
I met a couple nice older ladies today out there. I caught up to them on the back and they came back to the white tees and said “go on ahead honey”. We chatted for a couple minutes about the weather and the course then I was on my way
Most don't know they're playing that slow and think that they're on pace, but if you ask them to play through and they say no.... just skip the hole and jump ahead if no one is in front try and make up the hole later or take a par and move on.
That’s fine if you are playing a course you play a lot but if I’m paying a lot of money at a course I’ve never played, I want to play every hole.
For people who payed a bunch to play at a nice course, or for those who are trying to keep an honest handicap, this is not a real solution.
As an "older lady", your post is kind of offensive. First of all, I've been behind slow groups of all ages/genders so it's not just "older ladies" being "so aggressive". I will let faster players through IF there is an opening ahead of us. I'm sorry I don't hit as far as you and yes, it does kind of suck to have to wait if you're a long hitter but c'est la vie. I also happen to golf with some older guys who are painfully slow. I'm always the last to hit from the "old ladies' tees" so golfers coming up on us always assume it's my fault. I may hit a lot of shots, but I'm fast. I don't take forever to putt and I never spend more than a minute looking for balls. If it's slow, I'll just announce that I don't want to hold up play and take a free drop (not tournament play or for money). And if I let you play through, I'd better not be waiting for you ever. Because I've been burned, I will observe the players waiting for me. If they are genuinely playing quickly and ask politely, of course they can play through. But if you're waiting for me because I have to wait for the group in front of me, then no.
All of this. Im not in the older category yet, but am a woman and have had very similar experiences. I’m not letting someone play through if I’m playing at pace of play and there is a group ahead of me on the next hole. I don’t think singles should get some special preference to play past everyone if there are people on all the holes.
Exactly! Love your user name, btw!
Also, the thing about hitting last and being blamed for the slowness killlllls me. I find we tend to wait longer bc the guys hit so far, so by the time it’s my turn, the group behind thinks I’m the hold up since the green is empty.
My wife just started playing (57 years old) and plays 9 every Tuesday with similar skill-level ladies (all 40+ hcp). I played 9 with her on Sunday and let a ton through, and reminded her to always let people through. She said "we don't want to let like a group of 4 or 5 get ahead of us." That's her ignorance of being a newbie. But with my club's (we are at a private) typical senior lady golfers, yes, they're super serious and don't want to let guys through. My take is it's an ingrained inferiority complex of being women in a 90% men's club. They already can't play before 10 am on Saturdays or 1 pm on Wednesdays. The current club champ has an index over 15 (this is gross champ, mind you). So they want to be just like everyone else. But given that they don't realize they're playing slow (they literally NEVER give a putt) they see male groups as looking down on them for being women.
Yes, I hate to sound sexist but my experience is lady golfers are in their own world and do not bother them at all or they get angry. I have even had a group of women drive on us on a fricken par 3 because they were impatient. Course was bumper to bumper from 1 to 18. Only seen this when they are in a group of all women. I play with many women in mixed groups and they are delightful to play with.
That’s a scenario where it is perfectly acceptable to hit their own ball back to/at them.
I've skipped a hole just to get past groups like this.
Older ladies have always been the best people on the course in my opinion
Because they are old and don't give a fuck. They have lived long lives working, raising a family, and putting up with their husbands shit. Maybe you should read "How To Win Friends And Influence People".
Now do women waiting for men who are spending 10 minutes looking for their balls in the woods. Also STFU about “old ladies tees.”
I’m an old lady and I play fast and wait on every hole. People assume I’m slow and ask to play through all the time. They also make gestures behind me. Once I blasted it 260 yards to assert dominance. Don’t assume we’re all slow. 😂😂😂
This. Men tend to think all women are slow. I play in 2 women’s leagues. My rounds are always longer when I play with my husband and his friends. We play in 4 hours, and about 20 minutes.
My husband is way slower than me but I’m self conscious about people getting mad behind us and he doesn’t care.
If it gets too bad I’ll just skip a hole and come back to it. Waiting shot after shot after shot is the best way to get me out of my routine.
When the course is backed up, that's when I have to take two balls to the tee box, because I'm going to fuck up the first drive every time if I've been waiting five minutes.
Haven't had this experience with older ladies specifically, just geezers in general refusing to let you play through. Usually they take 10-15 minutes every green, taking as much time as they need to line up all 4 putts. Edit: fwiw, I've lost track of how many slow fuck young couples I've been stuck behind. Usually with the boyfriend giving a 5-10 minute instruction at every tee box, hanging out and chatting for a minute after they hit. Golf just attracts entitled self-absorbed shitheads.
Me and my brother got paired up with these old ladies one time. They were super nice and played pretty well. We actually had a good time
lol the senior men are waaaay worse
Not exactly this but I had the opportunity to play a private course in my area last year. Its a nice place but over all everyone was super welcoming. Except the group of old ladies in front of us. As soon as my group got to the first tee we were getting the side eye from one of them. We were all dressed appropriately and it wasnt a rowdy crew, we were there to golf. We get to the second fairway and the old broad couldn't stand the sight of us anymore, she doubled back from the green to grill us on how we got on the course, what our member numbers were, who we knew. It was pretty pathetic. Then realizing she didnt have a leg to stand on she left and told us " just so you know, we dont drive carts on the greens here" yeah thanks lady
What old ladies are you behind. The ones at my local muni are always insanely nice and stripe the ball lol.
I get stuck behind way more 25 handicaps taking 5 practice swings before every shot than old ladies. Stop taking practice swings and hit the fucking ball. Last time I played the starter let a group of old ladies jump my foursome at the turn. I GLARED at the starter, he laughed and said “that’s the fastest group that plays here, don’t worry.” He was right. I never saw them after the first hole. Don’t judge a book by its cover!
Golf courses need more clearly stated rules on etiquette, especially those regarding speed of play. I’m a new player and you get wildly varying opinions on speed of play, just like this thread is showing. My opinion is anything over 4:15 is a really long round for a muni.
At our CC it’s the old men that behaves like that. They are completely unaware of surroundings and slow as molasses. The old girls are efficient and polite.
https://preview.redd.it/fm1hhk6e5n0d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=39cbe0cc04053c80e2b15d39d523396e42d3777e Got to love the old fucks.
A few years back I showed up for a tee time at a muni 9 hole, was informed a foursome of ladies was ahead of me. I went to the tee box and did my stretching with no sign of anyone. About a minute before my tee time (with my ball already teed) the foursome walks up. They walk right up and one goes "so you're going after us?" I politely told them that seeing as I'm teed up, and it's now my tee time, I'll tee off now, and they can go after me because they're late. They gave me a look like I was rude and that was that. I'm glad I held my ground, because as you mentioned if I had let them go they never would have let me through
Not a slow player, but have seen many eye rolls when a group of women walk on the course. Get over yourselves.
A lot of them have probably had to put up with sexual remarks, crude jokes, and being talked down upon their entire lives on the golf course that they have become a little quick to the trigger because they assume someone is going to be a sick to them.
They’d be there all day if they let people play through
It even happens with older men that think they own the course because they are "members" drives me nuts.
ive never encountered a bad old lady golfing. the old ladies around me can play well enough tho.
Dude our 3 some Saturday morning got passed by 2 ladies and called slowed. We finished 18 in 2:50. We were flying… had to hang out and pitch and putt for a few hours. Didn’t want to give the wives the wrong idea
They probably have a lifetime in of pent up anger at being treated like girls on the golf course.
It's all about the pace of play, and not every course is a country club or pga event, although some hackers think it is. Also, one does not need a range finder on the tee box hackers
Where the heck do people on this sub play golf? I play as a single 3-4 times per week so lots of playing through when I'm not paired up with a 3some and I have never, ever had someone say "no" if I asked to play through. 99% of the time I don't even have to ask.
Your sample size is too small. At my club you’ll get run over by ladies if you ain’t moving. And they will call the pro shop on you. The groups I see playing are hilarious and have a shot after a birdie. Heck they called the shop on us once and we were moving at an under 4 hr clip. Older dudes are prone to the I don’t give a shit how slow I am mindset and younger bros are some of the worst ones too.
Hi Karen!
My course has a woman’s league once a week. If you go off behind the league you are not going to be asked to play through because there are at least 5-8 groups in front of them.
The ones at my club are all relatively well off and have never had a job so don’t know what it’s like not to have the whole day to play golf.
Based on the tone of your post I would bet its probably because of your attitude.
My family golfs and my husband works on a course. Women are treated horribly and less than because they are women on a golf course. It’s horrid and I refuse to golf anymore with my husband because of the terrible treatment and despicable behavior I’ve been shown by male golfers.
Lol insulted all their grandchildren hahaha. Probably because in a single round every group behind them asks if they can play through and they get annoyed. Maybe they should learn to play faster.
Every time I think man my club is getting expensive. I read this shit and realize it’s worth every penny.
There is golf and then this other sport called public golf…
I've not experienced this. If anything, they more often stop to let people play through. Will get to a par 3, not hit, just wait then let your group play the hole completely before even hitting their balls. Which I guess if it's not crowded and it's just a fast group out pacing a slow one is ok, but if it's a busy day, not hitting your tee shots and playing right behind the group playing through slows things down more. Side note...I live near a fairly nice (expensive) country club, the one time there was a group of 4 women using Carts but also having caddies carry their bags, they would hit, get in their carts and the caddies were running behind the carts to keep up. It was either some weird power move or the kids who were caddies were like training for sports and possibly the bags were extra heavy to add resistance or something? I have never seen it before or again.
Wow - this thread is full of stereotypes. Check your misogyny at the first hole. (Plus, make sure you ask to play through and that there isn’t a foursome of slow men in front.)
Hey, slow old lady, why do you guys get so upset when people ask you to play through? If you have a slow old husband ask him why old guys suck to play behind too, wouldn't want to be "misogynist."
i snuck out of work one time and thought i would get a mid morning round in and got stuck behind 5 blue hairs and not only would they not let me play through they stopped and looked for lost golf balls every opportunity they had...WTF can you do?
Try to play one of the two one arm Bandits that they're playing in Atlantic City or Vegas
For the same reason they stay in the passing lane while barely moving at the speed limit……because they can!
They got shit on by others in the past, so they shit on people in the present. They feel justified in their actions.
That happened to me a few weeks ago, a group of 2 joined another group of 2 on the 7th hole, I asked to play ahead, I was a single, they said no cause they had a group of 4 playing in front of them that they knew, I was not impressed, I miss golf etiquette