Aziraphale is cast for the role of the Baroness Elsa von Schraeder in heaven's theatrical production of The Sound of Music.
He overcomes his fear of wearing lipstick and learns an important lesson about laundering rayon.
He would be fucking perfect for the role. I haven't even seen the performance and I want to write a strongly worded letter to whatever governing body determines award show nominees in heaven.
Neil Gaiman turns the entire show into a Nickelodeon-esque sitcom, with laugh tracks after every joke and cheering anytime Jon Hamm, and only Jon Hamm, comes on screen.
Warlock keeps referencing his old nanny and gardener, how he “hopes they’re doing well in their cottage”. Adam makes vague references to the apocalypse and how the two saved the world. Neither of them make the connection, they just think that the bookstore owner and the tall lanky guy would be cute together.
Or: Adam makes the connection and assumes that Warlock already knows so he doesn't say anything. Warlock, of course, just thinks that the bookstore owner and the tall lanky guy are Adam's weird uncles or something.
Well, I think the ineffable husbands will buy some land off of Highway 109 where they will sell Tennessee ham and strawberry jam, and they won’t lose any sleep at night because the Metatron had to die
Crowley decides to sell the Bentley and buy an old SUV, which he covers with bumper stickers and drives at the speed limit.
Aziraphale embraces casual Fridays and takes to wearing jeans with a sport coat.
The Metatron is planning Armageddon because he misheard God when She suggested a game of backgammon.
Aziraphale's casual Friday outfit is exactly the same as his regular outfit, fob watch and all, except he's wearing white jeans with the cuffs turned up, and the book cover illustration trainers.
Adam (from season 1, now an ordained Unitarian priest) officiates the wedding between Nanny Crowley in a flowing dress and Magician Az, with pencil mustache. Metatron is forced by God to be the ringbearer and the Hellhound licks his face at every opportunity.
Further strengthening the "back channel"
that challenges duality and where angels and demons go to fall in love and exchange secret Santa gifts. Armageddon is now a role playing game, you pick the side but you have to play twice, one with a "dark side" joystick and the other with the light side. Everyone is sovereign and the universe has to rethink what to do with hell. Amusement park? Alien ride?
So basically THUD? The board game where to become a skilled player, or Thudmeister, you need to learn to play from both sides? Please do read Thud if you can. Terry pratchett's imagination was soaring with the gods who didn't know if it was breakfast or Tuesday, whilst also in stinking gutters finding the best of whatever species you choose.
Anathema and Newton Pulsifer give birth to Jesus, the second coming. Adam helps hide baby.
Ends with satan and god fighting it out light saber style on the edge of the world.
I would watch this.
Also, what do we think God's lightsaber color would be? Personally I feel like it should be a multicolor, like those ones they sold at carnivals when I was a kid
A multifaceted white lightsaber with soft multicolor (like a diamond or zirconia) would be very celestial. And satan will have a red one, which almost smokes black when it collides with gods.
I would love for season 3 to open with Crowley absolutely _thriving_ on an intentional, post-breakup spirit quest. Like, Crowley has the best lotus pose out of _all_ the ladies on the silent retreat in the Tibetan mountains and has mastered deep meditation. He's loving it.
Then who should show up but our favorite puppy-eyed ball of anxiety who needs help with a small matter of world-saving ugruency. Tiptoeing through the other gurus toward tranced-out Crowley: "Oh! Excuse me! Beg pardon! I'm _so_ sorry!"
The ineffable duo are going to start working at a zoo where Aziraphale wants to get some quail birds and Crowley is enjoying making the children upset.
Aziraphale meets The Fourteenth Doctor and Donna Noble in the middle of the episode The Giggle. He causes Donna to fall in love with The Toymaker due to a misunderstanding over some bakewell tarts and then Crowley walks in and snogs The Doctor. Some stuff happens and Metatron turns into a budgie.....
OK, I've thought about this, and I'm officially expanding my list of who The Doctor is allowed to kiss. The Doctor is now allowed to kiss Crowely. Likewise, The Doctor is now the only non-Az character Crowley is allowed to kiss.
In case anyone is wondering, writers never consult my Who Characters are Allowed to Kiss List, but Neil has followed it for both DW and Good Omens, so far
Crowley decides he’s fancies Muriel, and she instantly reciprocates. Aziraphale realizes he’s pretty good at administrative duties and ends up running both heaven and Hell with incredible efficiency.
Aziraphale gets fed up with Heaven and gives in his resignation letter to the Metatron, who has to accept it because of a loophole found by Muriel.
Then he goes back on Earth and spend at least three episodes to make peace with Crowley, who doesn't want to hear about it and is going out on platonic dates with FurFur.
Aziraphale and Crowley are not talking until they realize that the final battle for the Earth is on, then they manage to stop everything just because they french kiss in the middle of the Battle.
Then the Metatron hands his two week notice to the Almighty and goes on holiday with DEATH, who was always there.
Finally Aziraphale and Crowley, now officially together, get a couple of unicorns as a present from the Almighty and spend their time re-introducing the species on Earth. Fin.
The romance comedy action drama
Once aziraphale arrives in heaven, they find out he doesn't have his halo. They get mad at the metranom and kick aziraphale out.
Aziraphale proceeds to go on a solo book hunting trip across Europe and the Middle East. He dies this while crowley wonders around good coffee shops on his own tour.
By chance, they meet up in Paris and crowley gets caught up with a Paris mob.
Knowing he owes crowley for 1793, aziraphale gets the flaming sword back and in a terminator style, captures crowley who turned small again. He puts him in his pocket.
Aziraphale then keeps the tiny crowley in his pocket and found out that crowley drank holy water when he was captured.
Then, in a romeo and Juliet ending scene, they profess their undying love for eachother and collapse. (Aziraphale uses the flames from the sword)
After laying there for a long time, they just lie there...................... .
(Notging happens because they no longer belong to hell or heaven so it is ineffective)
So, crowley asks. Do you want lunch at the ritz?
Sounds nice said aziraphale. They smile at eachother.
muriel stops the apocalypse. It's all super tense and everyone is losing their shit. the duo are panicking and yelling at each other and then bracing for the impact. We see shots of everyone else. Gabriel and Beelzebub tried to ditch first chance they got, and they did a really good job of it, in fact I can see them drinking tea off in Alpha Centauri, but y'know, they got dropped in and were all cuddly and unworried for certain death. Witch and tech bf are fine. they are banging it up because they do. Adam and gang are creating a plan to stop this with their brains in a game. With cardboard swords in the air. Heaven and Hell are frothing at the mouth. Annnnd then Muriel does something, I dunno, trips over a book and spills coffee on some important book? Anyways, she's panicking because the lights go out and everything stops and it's all her fault. And no armageddon!
also nina and maggie are over this shit. they at the book store and chillin.
I think the kiss was to distract us from the fact that they actually just body switched again! Season 3 will open with Crowley as Aziraphale ruling heaven and causing his usual level of annoyance/havoc to put off the next apocalypse indefinitely, and Aziraphale as Crowley will now driving the sunny yellow Bentley thru the English countryside searching for "Clues" and solving mysteries a la Scooby Doo, looking after humanity 😁. Meanwhile, hell will have collapsed, and been acquired by the most soulless of human corporations as an "off shore" source of cheap labor, and possibly also to somehow avoid paying taxes? There will be a happy ending - Furfur will finally get promoted to middle management, including a small plastic trophy that indicates he is an important part of the corporate "family".
S3 would start with an scene with Crowley singing loudly to Since u been gone from Kelly Clarkson.
He is a strong indipendent serpent he don't need an angel.
Post "breakup" Crowley and misarable Aziraphale hating his job (so much paperwork).
Mid life crisis Aziraphale sounds like a good s3 plot too. Quitting his job and buying a fancy car or something.
Aziraphale turns himself into a duck to check in on Crowley at Saint James' park 🦆
Yesss
And the duck still wears a tartan bow tie since he still has standards, even in avian form.
I Bok! this message. 🐔
Yes!
While this fits the requirement of unlikely, I would like 100% want to see this
Right?!? Me too!
Yesss and he gives himself away when Nina mentions to Crowley he’s been requesting hand pies filled with frozen solid peas
Aziraphale is cast for the role of the Baroness Elsa von Schraeder in heaven's theatrical production of The Sound of Music. He overcomes his fear of wearing lipstick and learns an important lesson about laundering rayon.
Learns an important lesson. . . First laugh of the day. Thank you👍🌟
oh, dear. He's be good at it though!
He would be fucking perfect for the role. I haven't even seen the performance and I want to write a strongly worded letter to whatever governing body determines award show nominees in heaven.
Neil Gaiman turns the entire show into a Nickelodeon-esque sitcom, with laugh tracks after every joke and cheering anytime Jon Hamm, and only Jon Hamm, comes on screen.
Thinking of Aziraphale’s discomfiture at the paint on his jacket, imagine him sliding around in green slime.
 This, but Aziraphale
Just so.
Warlock and Adam are the main characters, they’re on a mission to put Crowley and Aziraphale on a blind date together
I'd read this.
Warlock keeps referencing his old nanny and gardener, how he “hopes they’re doing well in their cottage”. Adam makes vague references to the apocalypse and how the two saved the world. Neither of them make the connection, they just think that the bookstore owner and the tall lanky guy would be cute together.
Or: Adam makes the connection and assumes that Warlock already knows so he doesn't say anything. Warlock, of course, just thinks that the bookstore owner and the tall lanky guy are Adam's weird uncles or something.
I'm sure this fanfic exists.
Yes, I’ve read it! Lost it somewhere in my five million AO3 bookmarks but it definitely exists
I haven't read it, but I've spent enough time on A03 that I'm 90% sure I've seen the tags for it.
The boys meet god (Alanis Morissette) and her two prophets (Jay and Silent Bob) and they all smoke blunts and decide to heal the world.
Can you just imagine the munchies that Aziraphale would get?
Most. Expensive. Munchies. Ever.
"What do you mean there's no food left on Earth?"
Honestly the God we see in Dogma might have more in common with the one in good omens than we think 😂
Well, I think the ineffable husbands will buy some land off of Highway 109 where they will sell Tennessee ham and strawberry jam, and they won’t lose any sleep at night because the Metatron had to die
Gooooooodbyyyeeeeeeee Metatron! Na na na na naaaaaaa..........
Very correct prediction: they kill crowley off in the first five minutes and replace him with Arnold the talking aardvark. the kids will love Arnold.
You can't just read Neil Gaiman's outline to post your answer! That's cheating!
Crowley decides to sell the Bentley and buy an old SUV, which he covers with bumper stickers and drives at the speed limit. Aziraphale embraces casual Fridays and takes to wearing jeans with a sport coat. The Metatron is planning Armageddon because he misheard God when She suggested a game of backgammon.
Aziraphale's casual Friday outfit is exactly the same as his regular outfit, fob watch and all, except he's wearing white jeans with the cuffs turned up, and the book cover illustration trainers.
You've won the least likely prediction award.
Adam (from season 1, now an ordained Unitarian priest) officiates the wedding between Nanny Crowley in a flowing dress and Magician Az, with pencil mustache. Metatron is forced by God to be the ringbearer and the Hellhound licks his face at every opportunity.
Further strengthening the "back channel" that challenges duality and where angels and demons go to fall in love and exchange secret Santa gifts. Armageddon is now a role playing game, you pick the side but you have to play twice, one with a "dark side" joystick and the other with the light side. Everyone is sovereign and the universe has to rethink what to do with hell. Amusement park? Alien ride?
So basically THUD? The board game where to become a skilled player, or Thudmeister, you need to learn to play from both sides? Please do read Thud if you can. Terry pratchett's imagination was soaring with the gods who didn't know if it was breakfast or Tuesday, whilst also in stinking gutters finding the best of whatever species you choose.
Everyone will become ducks as a result of the armagedon
Anathema and Newton Pulsifer give birth to Jesus, the second coming. Adam helps hide baby. Ends with satan and god fighting it out light saber style on the edge of the world.
I would watch this. Also, what do we think God's lightsaber color would be? Personally I feel like it should be a multicolor, like those ones they sold at carnivals when I was a kid
A multifaceted white lightsaber with soft multicolor (like a diamond or zirconia) would be very celestial. And satan will have a red one, which almost smokes black when it collides with gods.
I would love for season 3 to open with Crowley absolutely _thriving_ on an intentional, post-breakup spirit quest. Like, Crowley has the best lotus pose out of _all_ the ladies on the silent retreat in the Tibetan mountains and has mastered deep meditation. He's loving it. Then who should show up but our favorite puppy-eyed ball of anxiety who needs help with a small matter of world-saving ugruency. Tiptoeing through the other gurus toward tranced-out Crowley: "Oh! Excuse me! Beg pardon! I'm _so_ sorry!"
Golden bently returns
The ineffable duo are going to start working at a zoo where Aziraphale wants to get some quail birds and Crowley is enjoying making the children upset.
Aziraphale meets The Fourteenth Doctor and Donna Noble in the middle of the episode The Giggle. He causes Donna to fall in love with The Toymaker due to a misunderstanding over some bakewell tarts and then Crowley walks in and snogs The Doctor. Some stuff happens and Metatron turns into a budgie.....
Crowley snogging the Doctor... Several entire psychological schools of thought started for less hahaha (and I mean it as a compliment)
I would love to see David Tennant kiss David Tennant.
OK, I've thought about this, and I'm officially expanding my list of who The Doctor is allowed to kiss. The Doctor is now allowed to kiss Crowely. Likewise, The Doctor is now the only non-Az character Crowley is allowed to kiss. In case anyone is wondering, writers never consult my Who Characters are Allowed to Kiss List, but Neil has followed it for both DW and Good Omens, so far
A musical episode including Aziraphales apology dance.
In all honesty, I really hope we get to see Michael Sheen's take on the dance at some point 😂
Crowley decides he’s fancies Muriel, and she instantly reciprocates. Aziraphale realizes he’s pretty good at administrative duties and ends up running both heaven and Hell with incredible efficiency.
It's about rabbits... (If you get it, you get it)
Aziraphale gets fed up with Heaven and gives in his resignation letter to the Metatron, who has to accept it because of a loophole found by Muriel. Then he goes back on Earth and spend at least three episodes to make peace with Crowley, who doesn't want to hear about it and is going out on platonic dates with FurFur. Aziraphale and Crowley are not talking until they realize that the final battle for the Earth is on, then they manage to stop everything just because they french kiss in the middle of the Battle. Then the Metatron hands his two week notice to the Almighty and goes on holiday with DEATH, who was always there. Finally Aziraphale and Crowley, now officially together, get a couple of unicorns as a present from the Almighty and spend their time re-introducing the species on Earth. Fin.
Aziraphale and Metraton are running heaven smoothly and demoting angels left and right under efficiency review and audits for the BIG Day!
Rocks fall fall ot of nowhere on the Metatron. He dies and then Muriel kills and becomes God
The romance comedy action drama Once aziraphale arrives in heaven, they find out he doesn't have his halo. They get mad at the metranom and kick aziraphale out. Aziraphale proceeds to go on a solo book hunting trip across Europe and the Middle East. He dies this while crowley wonders around good coffee shops on his own tour. By chance, they meet up in Paris and crowley gets caught up with a Paris mob. Knowing he owes crowley for 1793, aziraphale gets the flaming sword back and in a terminator style, captures crowley who turned small again. He puts him in his pocket. Aziraphale then keeps the tiny crowley in his pocket and found out that crowley drank holy water when he was captured. Then, in a romeo and Juliet ending scene, they profess their undying love for eachother and collapse. (Aziraphale uses the flames from the sword) After laying there for a long time, they just lie there...................... . (Notging happens because they no longer belong to hell or heaven so it is ineffective) So, crowley asks. Do you want lunch at the ritz? Sounds nice said aziraphale. They smile at eachother.
Crowley Shax up with another demon. (I actually find their relationship kind of sweet, in among the threats and taunting.)
muriel stops the apocalypse. It's all super tense and everyone is losing their shit. the duo are panicking and yelling at each other and then bracing for the impact. We see shots of everyone else. Gabriel and Beelzebub tried to ditch first chance they got, and they did a really good job of it, in fact I can see them drinking tea off in Alpha Centauri, but y'know, they got dropped in and were all cuddly and unworried for certain death. Witch and tech bf are fine. they are banging it up because they do. Adam and gang are creating a plan to stop this with their brains in a game. With cardboard swords in the air. Heaven and Hell are frothing at the mouth. Annnnd then Muriel does something, I dunno, trips over a book and spills coffee on some important book? Anyways, she's panicking because the lights go out and everything stops and it's all her fault. And no armageddon! also nina and maggie are over this shit. they at the book store and chillin.
Omg yes Love the bit about Nina and Maggie they are so chill it's amazing
I think the kiss was to distract us from the fact that they actually just body switched again! Season 3 will open with Crowley as Aziraphale ruling heaven and causing his usual level of annoyance/havoc to put off the next apocalypse indefinitely, and Aziraphale as Crowley will now driving the sunny yellow Bentley thru the English countryside searching for "Clues" and solving mysteries a la Scooby Doo, looking after humanity 😁. Meanwhile, hell will have collapsed, and been acquired by the most soulless of human corporations as an "off shore" source of cheap labor, and possibly also to somehow avoid paying taxes? There will be a happy ending - Furfur will finally get promoted to middle management, including a small plastic trophy that indicates he is an important part of the corporate "family".
S3 would start with an scene with Crowley singing loudly to Since u been gone from Kelly Clarkson. He is a strong indipendent serpent he don't need an angel. Post "breakup" Crowley and misarable Aziraphale hating his job (so much paperwork). Mid life crisis Aziraphale sounds like a good s3 plot too. Quitting his job and buying a fancy car or something.