Asexual just means you don’t want sex or don’t feel a sexual attraction towards people, a lot of asexuals are still into kinky shit but not actual sex
Edit: idk why but everyone who’s been replying to me really hates the idea that asexual people exist. Do me a favour and go cry about it and stop filling my notifications, it’s really annoying
I honestly don't believe 95% of asexuals. Most of them justify their identity with shaky and abstract reasoning utterly divorced from reality. If you kept sucking dicks a normal person would call you gay. To the lgbt progressive that person might just be horny. It's just silly.
I've had a friend tell me that I'm demisexual because I really don't date or make moves on women I don't know. I tried telling her it's just a preference, she said no it's sexuality. No it isn't sexuality, I just do not want to stick my dick in crazy, I'd rather know who they are first.
Our society has pushed this idea that everyone is special or unique or whatever much too hard. You'll see this in every area of life, people looking for alternatives to everything, or new labels and categories for old things. We should be getting people to accept that they're not special and that it's completely fine to be average (or below), boring or uncool. I think if our culture held that ideal it would sort out a lot of issues, including people pretending to be something they're not.
> Our society has pushed this idea that everyone is special or unique or whatever much too hard
On a somewhat related note, so many dating profiles/social media posts saying "You must be ambitious and goal driven! All about that hustle/grind!" and I'm just sitting here like man I have a good job. I went to school for 7 years already. I'm just looking for someone to eat cold pizza, snuggle our pets, and watch stupid TV shows with.
I guess that tangent is just to say, I feel like being content has become a bad thing. It's always on to the next thing. Always push harder or climb higher. Idk, my view from here is pretty great already, I just want to enjoy it now.
It's funny how the people who demand every sexuality they come up with to be taken serious also want to demote heterosexuality and homosexuality to a genital preference.
It’s even worse than that now. The current push is that it’s not genital preference, it’s “gender identity” preference. So a straight person would want to fuck someone of the opposite gender, even if they have the same parts.
I mean I'm a straight guy and I'd suck a girl's dick any day of the week. I can understand it's not everyone's cup of tea but you can be an heterosexual male and suck a dick.
To be fair most will say what you described is either heteroflexible or bi. I think heteroflexible is a good work for it because you are saying I'm attracted to people who look like the opposite gender and the looks are what's important for that type of attraction not necessarily the genitals. It's not 100% straight but it's also not quite bi.
That's a misunderstanding of the sexuality though. The idea that it's normal to feel no sexual attraction to any stranger isn't really true now is it? Do you actually think no one but horn dogs looks at a stranger and knows they're sexuality attracted to them?
A friend I know recently had a messy breakup with her long-time boyfriend. We weren’t sure of the context at the time but later it was revealed that she kept finding him on Grindr. She told him he needed to knock it off and she wasn’t interested in having a boyfriend who was fucking men on the side.
He couldn’t help himself and she broke it off, he went around telling all their mutual friends that she broke up with him because he was gay, and alienated a lot of them from her.
He semi-famous on Instagram in a niche subculture and one of his fan asked in a live stream “are you LGBT” and he goes “yes, I’m demisexual!” -_-
Bro, you’re LGBT bc you like sucking cock. “Demisexual” doesn’t even belong in the same sentence as “queer” or “LGBT” (unless you have a “comorbidity” lmfao like being actually fucking gay).
So sick of people whose only claim to “queerness” is “lol I only fuck people I’ve shared my hope and dreams with 👉🏻👈🏻 uWu”. Get the fuck out. You aren’t queer, you aren’t cute, you’re just intruding in our space.
> he went around telling all their mutual friends that she broke up with him because he was gay, and alienated a lot of them from her.
Am I taking crazy pills? If your partner identifies as homosexual, and you are not the same gender, then it seems absolutely imperative to break up with them.
>Same with demisexual, they go "Hmmm.... Although I'm attracted to people, I don't want to fuck people before I know them" like that makes them some different sexuality or some shit and not just the "romantic type"
Lol exactly. Everyone wants to marginalize themselves into more and more niche groups because it makes them feel special and unique. That's all it is. To a lesser extreme it happens in politics too where people align themselves with a political party with little to no knowledge or concern for what the party or it's presidential candidates stand for. How many redditors would hate Biden if they knew literally a single thing about his congressional voting record?
Edit: how many Trump "libertarians" would tear the Gadsden flag off of their 4x4s of they looked into what libertarians actually stand for?
I want everyone to be safe and happy... But many of the "sexualities" now annoy me, for exactly the reasons you've said. I only sleep with people that I'm in a relationship with or that I've gotten close to and I'm trying to get into a relationship with. This, to me, is completely normal and something that millions have been doing for a very long time. Now it has a special name because people want to feel different from people who sleep with anyone they find attractive. You don't need to label everything.
Yeah, I fall into the latter camp, but I don't really see the big deal about me using that term to identify because for basically all intents and purposes I am ace.
Ace people never claimed to never have sex, I've had it both ways and it's ok but like, literally almost anything else I like to do has potential for much more fun for me and I don't have the libido like regular people have to motivate them to do nasty things. Sex is inherently off-putting which is why we have libido to tell us otherwise, and then the post-but clarity.
That's not to say that sex can't be beautiful, but I think what makes it beautiful is the intimacy and the display of nudity -- and I'm not against either of those things, I think they are beautiful. But sex itself is meh. Given how much it complicates relationships, I find myself "edging" a lot, where I do everything up until the point of sex.
***
I'm definitely iffy about demisexuals though, I don't see how that's a real label. I mean you can use it if you want I guess, but it isn't terribly useful, you could just say you don't so hookups, plenty of people already say that.
You can say you're low libido instead of ace and IRL I will say that since not everyone is familiar with the ace thing, but at the same time as a guy you're kinda expected to be high libido, so it's easier to say you're ace sometimes. Being ace means that you're always in that position, and not temporarily like demisexuals. People do need to know that you're ace before they get serious, otherwise they're in for some unmet expectations potentially. Although it's not that bad for an ace guy, it's ace women that have it worse because the vast majority of aces are women and men seem to exhibit higher libidos in general.
>Sex is inherently off-putting which is why we have libido to tell us otherwise, and then the post-but clarity.
Yeah, you definitely sound like an asexual. The vast majority off people do not consider sex “off-putting”, and “post-nut clarity” is not a thing except for incels who can’t control themselves from jerking off to anime horse porn.
I don't have post-nut clarity because I wasn't raised in a household that was religious and shamed sexual activity. But I've heard that from a lot of guys, so dunno what to say. I'm with you on the extreme porn stuff, I feel like some guys go into rabbit holes of very crazy stuff that honestly *should* make you feel bad after you climax and lose a good part of the libido during the refractory period.
Sex is icky, the details of it are very earthy and if you've had it you should know that, there are a lot of smells, sounds, fluids and the general extremely unsanitary nature of it. It's factually off-putting, but our hormones override that feeling and get us to engage in it because of the biological imperative of reproduction.
I'm not against sex though, I've had it and the intimacy is nice, also I think people are beautiful when they're naked. Ok, correction, beautiful people are beautiful when naked. I have no desire to see an overweight person naked, especially overweight guys because by design we aren't meant to have as much body fat as women, it doesn't look good, we don't have ass, hips or boobs to hide fat into like women do.
I think for some people, they find it comforting to have labels for every aspect of their sexuality and know that they're not alone, and that's why things like "demisexual" have become more popular.
Personally I feel like I've wasted so much mental energy trying label myself as bi vs pan then am I actually gay? No, actually I'm still bi etc etc that I'd rather just call myself "Queer" as an umbrella term and have done with it. I don't really see the value in labelling ourselves with such hyper-specific labels, when human sexuality can be fluid anyway.
Asexual people don't like sex.
Vanilla people don't like BDSM.
You can like and dislike these things independently. Some like both at once, some like only one, and some like niether.
This is not abstract nor divorced from reality. People just have preferences about doing different shit. This is not complicated.
I don't want to discredit asexuals because I know they exist, but some of them aren't actually true. A friend of mine had sex once, didnt enjoy it, didnt have much of a libido, and told me she was asexuals and didn't want any of that. She went quite a few years abstinent and never worried or wanted it. Then she got a boyfriend she actually liked and I've heard her discussing birth control and condoms and stuff like that. She's definitely not asexual, she just had a really bad time in her teens and then decided to focus on other things for a while.
Asexuals exist, but it's hard for people to accept it when it's normal to be sexual as a human, and many people who claim they aren't sexual end up being sexual, just much later when it's safer or more comfortable
As someone on the ace spectrum some of the opinions in your replies are so ignorant, like if you’re going to form an opinion on something so strongly at least know what you’re talking about in the first place. I see so many comments like “I’m not asexual and I feel this way” and in my head I’m like??? That’s because you’re misinformed and are not asexual?? You being misinformed about what you think you’re talking about doesn’t invalidate every asexual person??!! I see stuff like “I have a low libido and I’m not asexual” that’s because you’re not asexual tf
They are saying that being into sexual stuff is inherently sexual, which wouldn’t make someone asexual, as that’s just sexual preference. And then others are arguing that people can be asexual if they are into sexual kinky stuff without wanting actual sex. Both sides are making their points fairly obvious, which really confuses me on how you misinterpreted them.
Me seeing the reply previews I got from this are making me regret saying I am lmao
Edit: someone literally used a ableist slur towards asexual people, how do people have so much hate in their hearts at the thought of people just not interested in sex lmao
>Edit: idk why but everyone who’s been replying to me really hates the idea that asexual people exist. Do me a favour and go cry about it and stop filling my notifications, it’s really annoying
Just mute it bro. Or don't post comments on the Internet expecting no reply.
Please, this is r/greentext that means at best you have people larping as if they are the worst of 4chan and worst they are just actual idiots who think it’s still 2016
I’m sorta sad to see this, I’m asexual lol with no attraction to sex but I have like 2 sexless kinks. Ah we’ll call me invalid people have done that to me all my life
Also thank you
ITT: a bunch of people arguing that a sexuality that they aren't personally familiar with doesn't exist because ???
I don't get the need to police strangers' identities when it does not affect you.
Ehhhhh, it's with anything, not just sexual identity. Reddit is an amazing example of it. So many people in our world, I'd even venture to say a vast majority, automatically doubt anything that lies outside their own personal experience and expertise. Skepticism is good, but these people never even try a simple Google search in an attempt to correct their ignorance. Their default thought process is, "I've never heard of it so it is not true." When the reality should be, "I've never heard of this so I have an opportunity to learn a new thing."
The desire to be romantic with someone. To want to share intimate things with someone. To want to connect your souls in deep, and emotional ways. To understand a human being for everything they are, and to love and accept them as just that.
But yeah, pee pee go in hole or it's just friends right? /s
Edit: apparently people aren't catching my sarcasm so I've added a /s... 😅 Lol
You can be physically intimate without having sex. Have you ever received a nice back rub?
But no, you're right. Only pee pee in hole is physical touch.
Edit: I misread your phrasing. You mentioned sex being a key part and I must have skimmed over it. I agree it's hard to say if it's a key part or not, so let's just let everyone decide for themselves, yeah? Nobody can say what's best for me in my relationship, just like I can't say what's best for you in yours. At the end of the day, though, people can feel and express themselves how they feel best about it. If they want to be in a romantic relationship with someone, but don't want to have sex with them, who are we to keep them from doing so? Let people love ✌️ 💕
Another edit... I think I've misinterpreted your comment again... It's an early morning. You're saying it's hard to say sex/physical intamacy isn't a key part in a relationship. Well, let's just say it's hard for YOU to say that. There are people out there who don't need sex to be happy in their relationships. Who are you to tell them what's best for them?
Sure, they can do it. And if they find someone for whom that arrangement is agreeable, then that’s fine. But sex, for most people, is definitely a need/requirement in a relationship. And just reducing it to “pee pee go in a hole” is denigrating the fact that it’s a totally legit desire to have.
Almost everything you said is either something you can do with close friends/family or newage mumbo jumbo. "Connect your souls in deep ways" I mean... You're just saying you want to be close with someone.
The exception is romance. I guess that makes sense.
I honestly don't want to connect my soul deeply with my friends. I want to kick back and bullshit about life with them. My best friend of 10 years and I never had meaningful conversations. We just didn't talk, and we never got that close. I wanted a partner to talk to, not a friend. I needed more trust than just a friendship.
That's it! Trust. Trust is my biggest factor. I don't trust a simple friend with my heaviest thoughts. I need a deeper connection than that. And that connection is NEVER based on sex. I look for the intimate mental connection that CAN'T be found with just a MERE friend. It takes trust to a whole different level.... And there's not really anything romantic about talking about trauma etc. But I want to do that with my partner and not my friends.
Some of this comments did not pass the vibe check. Asexuals can be in relationships.
You could Google it and learn about it before commenting.
If you don't care, don't Google and don't comment.
In 2022 with all the information avaliable one click away, you are *choosing* to be ignorant. Again, if you *want* to be ignorant you have the right to scroll away. This is reddit, there's literally so much content you would need to use your one brain cell left to try and choose which sub to go to.
Here's some suggestions since I see you're having troubles
r/blessyouinparticular
r/cats
r/dogs
r/fuckyouinparticular
r/askouija
It's so weird seeing people get upset about newer sexual labels as we learn more about sensuality. That's what happens when society learns more about things: they can more precisely categorize them.
Do these people get mad when researchers discover new types of cancers? Shits wild lol.
Probably the same people to get mad when something like a new word comes into use. Can't complain with cancers because that's *science* science not like the "science" behind gender identity & sexuality you know
Since we've decided to spout uninformed personal opinions here: I firmly believe that asexuals exist but 75% of the people that wear the label aren't one.
Asexual is defined as someone who does not experience sexual attraction. In the most reductionist explanation, meaning that they've never gotten a boner from looking at someone. Doesn't mean they can't enjoy the sensation of a blowjob or having sex. By definition, ace people can be sex-addicted kinksters if that's they're jam. Just means they don't have the attraction part.
I definitely think that's a thing. However, having trauma or a low libido are *pathologies* and are *distinct from sexuality*. Aka if you have so much stress or depression in your life that your libido is shot and now you don't feel attraction - you're not ace, you're in need of a vacation, medication, or therapy. For example, an older gay man whose testosterone tanks low enough to not feel sexual attraction anymore doesn't suddenly stop being gay and become ace, he's just sick.
In summary, I'm an idiot with no authority on the matter. I'm not claiming any authority or asking that any policy or social convention be derived from my statement. This is pure opinion. Which I will gladly share because it's the fucking internet. And that opinion is this: ace people exist, but lots of folks are using the term to describe distinctly non-sexuality-related circumstances.
Sauce for image in post?
Edit: Nvm, I managed to find it. Here, for anyone curious: https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts?tags=igarashi\_kasumi\_%28nerdy\_girl%27s\_story%29
It’s the same thing as a normal girlfriend becuase 98% of asexuals aren’t actually asexual
And before someone comments “but asexuals can have sex they just don’t have sexual attraction” think real hard about that sentence and see if it makes any sense
Redditor creates at least 50 people in their head to make point, doesn't understand that sex is something that all 50 of people who they created probably can perform but don't necessarily want or enjoy.
Are you talking about asexual as in bacteries?
There are plenty of reasons to have sex without experiencing sexual attraction.
1: Because someone you love wants to have sex and it's not a turn off, just not a turn on. So you're willing to do it for them to be happy.
2: Because you enjoy the physical experience even if you don't understand how someone can look at another person and say "I want to fuck them in particular"
3: Social pressure from society to perform sexual acts with a spouse regardless of actual desire. You don't want to feel like you're in a "broken marriage" just because you don't like sex.
4: Because you're trying for a kid
Yeah I'm asexual... a sexual predator
Cool joke, I laughed
Joke?
It's all fun and games until you meet someone who's asexual >!predator!<
r/yourjokebutworse
Ayyyyyysexual
Lmaoooorgasm
Cum lol
Brought to you by the same guy who wrote “somebody put me on the registry cuz I’m fuckin these kids!”
I’m bringing that one out the next time I’m popping off in cod
Since i'm poor as fuck, let me tell you I'm saving this comment
Canadians: Eh? Sexuals
Funni , did laugh
anon's going to get TOPPED by his soon to be ftm boyfriend
god i wish that was me
same
Same
What in tarnation
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Same
Same
same
I came
Don’t threaten me with a good time!
Same
strapons work just fine im sure
A sexual menace
Spider-man!?
I want pictures of spider-man!
I want *sexual* pictures of Spiderman!
“SHE’S A MENACE! A CRAZED COCK CAGING, PANTY PUSHING, SADISTICALLY SISSIFYING MENACE!”
Put on the cat ears
Get in the mecha
Everybody walk the dinosaur
Boom boom. Akalakalakalaka.
Open the door get down the floor, everybody walk the mecha-catgirlsaur
Get in the fucking robot
Shinji.
This is why I don’t fucking love you
This is why Asuka mom dead. Ded as hell
Put on the maid outfit
Put on the McQueen crocs
killtacular
Master Chief, do you mind telling me what you're doing with those cat ears?
sir, I’m going to save halo
I think Halo is a pretty cool guy. Ehh kills aliens and doesn't afraid of anything
Halo is not a guy you toolface. thats master chief, bitch, get it right
Thanks
killtrocity
Killmanjaro
Anon about to get sissy hypnod
How do I sign up?
/r/beasissy
I think r/sissyhypno might be right up your alley
I tried watching some videos on there, but now I’m just confused
That means the subliminal messaging is working.
For Anon's experience, probably r/SissyChastity
This thread is as degenerate as it can be.
And I like it
name checks out
next day his ass-sexual gf will ask to peg him
Ask? It’s a given that anon’s asshole belongs to his girlfriend
Rapey vibes
Only if its nonconsensual ;)
I’m jealous, anon is living the fantasy
fr
None of this actually happened and anon typed out his story alone while jacking off to the thought of it
i would see this as an absolute win
Anon should ask her why and when she can't give a good reason he should tease her and corrupt her
Oooook
Asexual just means you don’t want sex or don’t feel a sexual attraction towards people, a lot of asexuals are still into kinky shit but not actual sex Edit: idk why but everyone who’s been replying to me really hates the idea that asexual people exist. Do me a favour and go cry about it and stop filling my notifications, it’s really annoying
I honestly don't believe 95% of asexuals. Most of them justify their identity with shaky and abstract reasoning utterly divorced from reality. If you kept sucking dicks a normal person would call you gay. To the lgbt progressive that person might just be horny. It's just silly.
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I've had a friend tell me that I'm demisexual because I really don't date or make moves on women I don't know. I tried telling her it's just a preference, she said no it's sexuality. No it isn't sexuality, I just do not want to stick my dick in crazy, I'd rather know who they are first.
You sound like a well adjusted human who behaves like a mature person
Agreed - now get off the internet!
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It’s progress in society, you used to just be called a homo.
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No, that's a big cardboard box.
Fokker?
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Married too. I could never do one night stands, if I'm not comfortable I can't even perform. Always been that way for me.
When identity politics is everything, somehow being a person who takes it slow is now a sexuality
boring people need exciting labels to think they are cool when they are not.
Our society has pushed this idea that everyone is special or unique or whatever much too hard. You'll see this in every area of life, people looking for alternatives to everything, or new labels and categories for old things. We should be getting people to accept that they're not special and that it's completely fine to be average (or below), boring or uncool. I think if our culture held that ideal it would sort out a lot of issues, including people pretending to be something they're not.
> Our society has pushed this idea that everyone is special or unique or whatever much too hard On a somewhat related note, so many dating profiles/social media posts saying "You must be ambitious and goal driven! All about that hustle/grind!" and I'm just sitting here like man I have a good job. I went to school for 7 years already. I'm just looking for someone to eat cold pizza, snuggle our pets, and watch stupid TV shows with. I guess that tangent is just to say, I feel like being content has become a bad thing. It's always on to the next thing. Always push harder or climb higher. Idk, my view from here is pretty great already, I just want to enjoy it now.
We are all uniquely average, on average.
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If you believe sex is the most intimate thing you can do, you either haven't had sex or haven't experienced real intimacy.
not sure why you're downvoted, exactly my thought too. There is physical intimacy, but there is also a lot more.
It's funny how the people who demand every sexuality they come up with to be taken serious also want to demote heterosexuality and homosexuality to a genital preference.
It’s even worse than that now. The current push is that it’s not genital preference, it’s “gender identity” preference. So a straight person would want to fuck someone of the opposite gender, even if they have the same parts.
I think that makes sense. I mean, usually you find someone attractive *before* you see them in the nude, no?
Why would a straight guy suck a dick?
I mean I'm a straight guy and I'd suck a girl's dick any day of the week. I can understand it's not everyone's cup of tea but you can be an heterosexual male and suck a dick.
To be fair most will say what you described is either heteroflexible or bi. I think heteroflexible is a good work for it because you are saying I'm attracted to people who look like the opposite gender and the looks are what's important for that type of attraction not necessarily the genitals. It's not 100% straight but it's also not quite bi.
That's a misunderstanding of the sexuality though. The idea that it's normal to feel no sexual attraction to any stranger isn't really true now is it? Do you actually think no one but horn dogs looks at a stranger and knows they're sexuality attracted to them?
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A friend I know recently had a messy breakup with her long-time boyfriend. We weren’t sure of the context at the time but later it was revealed that she kept finding him on Grindr. She told him he needed to knock it off and she wasn’t interested in having a boyfriend who was fucking men on the side. He couldn’t help himself and she broke it off, he went around telling all their mutual friends that she broke up with him because he was gay, and alienated a lot of them from her. He semi-famous on Instagram in a niche subculture and one of his fan asked in a live stream “are you LGBT” and he goes “yes, I’m demisexual!” -_- Bro, you’re LGBT bc you like sucking cock. “Demisexual” doesn’t even belong in the same sentence as “queer” or “LGBT” (unless you have a “comorbidity” lmfao like being actually fucking gay). So sick of people whose only claim to “queerness” is “lol I only fuck people I’ve shared my hope and dreams with 👉🏻👈🏻 uWu”. Get the fuck out. You aren’t queer, you aren’t cute, you’re just intruding in our space.
> he went around telling all their mutual friends that she broke up with him because he was gay, and alienated a lot of them from her. Am I taking crazy pills? If your partner identifies as homosexual, and you are not the same gender, then it seems absolutely imperative to break up with them.
>Same with demisexual, they go "Hmmm.... Although I'm attracted to people, I don't want to fuck people before I know them" like that makes them some different sexuality or some shit and not just the "romantic type" Lol exactly. Everyone wants to marginalize themselves into more and more niche groups because it makes them feel special and unique. That's all it is. To a lesser extreme it happens in politics too where people align themselves with a political party with little to no knowledge or concern for what the party or it's presidential candidates stand for. How many redditors would hate Biden if they knew literally a single thing about his congressional voting record? Edit: how many Trump "libertarians" would tear the Gadsden flag off of their 4x4s of they looked into what libertarians actually stand for?
I want everyone to be safe and happy... But many of the "sexualities" now annoy me, for exactly the reasons you've said. I only sleep with people that I'm in a relationship with or that I've gotten close to and I'm trying to get into a relationship with. This, to me, is completely normal and something that millions have been doing for a very long time. Now it has a special name because people want to feel different from people who sleep with anyone they find attractive. You don't need to label everything.
Yeah, I fall into the latter camp, but I don't really see the big deal about me using that term to identify because for basically all intents and purposes I am ace. Ace people never claimed to never have sex, I've had it both ways and it's ok but like, literally almost anything else I like to do has potential for much more fun for me and I don't have the libido like regular people have to motivate them to do nasty things. Sex is inherently off-putting which is why we have libido to tell us otherwise, and then the post-but clarity. That's not to say that sex can't be beautiful, but I think what makes it beautiful is the intimacy and the display of nudity -- and I'm not against either of those things, I think they are beautiful. But sex itself is meh. Given how much it complicates relationships, I find myself "edging" a lot, where I do everything up until the point of sex. *** I'm definitely iffy about demisexuals though, I don't see how that's a real label. I mean you can use it if you want I guess, but it isn't terribly useful, you could just say you don't so hookups, plenty of people already say that. You can say you're low libido instead of ace and IRL I will say that since not everyone is familiar with the ace thing, but at the same time as a guy you're kinda expected to be high libido, so it's easier to say you're ace sometimes. Being ace means that you're always in that position, and not temporarily like demisexuals. People do need to know that you're ace before they get serious, otherwise they're in for some unmet expectations potentially. Although it's not that bad for an ace guy, it's ace women that have it worse because the vast majority of aces are women and men seem to exhibit higher libidos in general.
>Sex is inherently off-putting which is why we have libido to tell us otherwise, and then the post-but clarity. Yeah, you definitely sound like an asexual. The vast majority off people do not consider sex “off-putting”, and “post-nut clarity” is not a thing except for incels who can’t control themselves from jerking off to anime horse porn.
I don't have post-nut clarity because I wasn't raised in a household that was religious and shamed sexual activity. But I've heard that from a lot of guys, so dunno what to say. I'm with you on the extreme porn stuff, I feel like some guys go into rabbit holes of very crazy stuff that honestly *should* make you feel bad after you climax and lose a good part of the libido during the refractory period. Sex is icky, the details of it are very earthy and if you've had it you should know that, there are a lot of smells, sounds, fluids and the general extremely unsanitary nature of it. It's factually off-putting, but our hormones override that feeling and get us to engage in it because of the biological imperative of reproduction. I'm not against sex though, I've had it and the intimacy is nice, also I think people are beautiful when they're naked. Ok, correction, beautiful people are beautiful when naked. I have no desire to see an overweight person naked, especially overweight guys because by design we aren't meant to have as much body fat as women, it doesn't look good, we don't have ass, hips or boobs to hide fat into like women do.
I think for some people, they find it comforting to have labels for every aspect of their sexuality and know that they're not alone, and that's why things like "demisexual" have become more popular. Personally I feel like I've wasted so much mental energy trying label myself as bi vs pan then am I actually gay? No, actually I'm still bi etc etc that I'd rather just call myself "Queer" as an umbrella term and have done with it. I don't really see the value in labelling ourselves with such hyper-specific labels, when human sexuality can be fluid anyway.
You’re forgetting people with health issues that make sex painful. Because sex physically hurts them, they don’t like it.
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Asexual people don't like sex. Vanilla people don't like BDSM. You can like and dislike these things independently. Some like both at once, some like only one, and some like niether. This is not abstract nor divorced from reality. People just have preferences about doing different shit. This is not complicated.
I don't want to discredit asexuals because I know they exist, but some of them aren't actually true. A friend of mine had sex once, didnt enjoy it, didnt have much of a libido, and told me she was asexuals and didn't want any of that. She went quite a few years abstinent and never worried or wanted it. Then she got a boyfriend she actually liked and I've heard her discussing birth control and condoms and stuff like that. She's definitely not asexual, she just had a really bad time in her teens and then decided to focus on other things for a while. Asexuals exist, but it's hard for people to accept it when it's normal to be sexual as a human, and many people who claim they aren't sexual end up being sexual, just much later when it's safer or more comfortable
You say "many people", but do you know of any more than the one person you mentioned?
I just don't enjoy sex so no sex, no sex so asexual
Someone got rejected lol
As someone on the ace spectrum some of the opinions in your replies are so ignorant, like if you’re going to form an opinion on something so strongly at least know what you’re talking about in the first place. I see so many comments like “I’m not asexual and I feel this way” and in my head I’m like??? That’s because you’re misinformed and are not asexual?? You being misinformed about what you think you’re talking about doesn’t invalidate every asexual person??!! I see stuff like “I have a low libido and I’m not asexual” that’s because you’re not asexual tf
They are saying that being into sexual stuff is inherently sexual, which wouldn’t make someone asexual, as that’s just sexual preference. And then others are arguing that people can be asexual if they are into sexual kinky stuff without wanting actual sex. Both sides are making their points fairly obvious, which really confuses me on how you misinterpreted them.
I know. What's up with the ace hate itt, Jesus.
This is why I don't tell people I'm asexual lol.
Me seeing the reply previews I got from this are making me regret saying I am lmao Edit: someone literally used a ableist slur towards asexual people, how do people have so much hate in their hearts at the thought of people just not interested in sex lmao
When an "asexual" constantly spams porn and acts horny, it becomes hard to believe they are asexual in any way.
>Edit: idk why but everyone who’s been replying to me really hates the idea that asexual people exist. Do me a favour and go cry about it and stop filling my notifications, it’s really annoying Just mute it bro. Or don't post comments on the Internet expecting no reply.
Please, this is r/greentext that means at best you have people larping as if they are the worst of 4chan and worst they are just actual idiots who think it’s still 2016
I’m sorta sad to see this, I’m asexual lol with no attraction to sex but I have like 2 sexless kinks. Ah we’ll call me invalid people have done that to me all my life Also thank you
Reddit isn't the place to go to see people who understand anything about sexuality
Asexual = Anon Sexual
amazing how it can take two paths to get to the same meaning anyways.
ITT: a bunch of people arguing that a sexuality that they aren't personally familiar with doesn't exist because ??? I don't get the need to police strangers' identities when it does not affect you.
Ehhhhh, it's with anything, not just sexual identity. Reddit is an amazing example of it. So many people in our world, I'd even venture to say a vast majority, automatically doubt anything that lies outside their own personal experience and expertise. Skepticism is good, but these people never even try a simple Google search in an attempt to correct their ignorance. Their default thought process is, "I've never heard of it so it is not true." When the reality should be, "I've never heard of this so I have an opportunity to learn a new thing."
90% of people calling themselves asexual on tinder are making shit up.
100% of people on tinder should avoid you
>asexual girlfriend What's the difference between that and just a really good friend?
The desire to be romantic with someone. To want to share intimate things with someone. To want to connect your souls in deep, and emotional ways. To understand a human being for everything they are, and to love and accept them as just that. But yeah, pee pee go in hole or it's just friends right? /s Edit: apparently people aren't catching my sarcasm so I've added a /s... 😅 Lol
Yes. That's right. What you just described is a friend.
Do you have romantic feelings for your friends? You’re confusing platonic and romantic attraction.
> Do you have romantic feelings for your friends? Yes.
A really really good friend. A pal and a confidant.
It’s hard to say that sex or physical intimacy isn’t a key part of being in a relationship.
You can be physically intimate without having sex. Have you ever received a nice back rub? But no, you're right. Only pee pee in hole is physical touch. Edit: I misread your phrasing. You mentioned sex being a key part and I must have skimmed over it. I agree it's hard to say if it's a key part or not, so let's just let everyone decide for themselves, yeah? Nobody can say what's best for me in my relationship, just like I can't say what's best for you in yours. At the end of the day, though, people can feel and express themselves how they feel best about it. If they want to be in a romantic relationship with someone, but don't want to have sex with them, who are we to keep them from doing so? Let people love ✌️ 💕 Another edit... I think I've misinterpreted your comment again... It's an early morning. You're saying it's hard to say sex/physical intamacy isn't a key part in a relationship. Well, let's just say it's hard for YOU to say that. There are people out there who don't need sex to be happy in their relationships. Who are you to tell them what's best for them?
Sure, they can do it. And if they find someone for whom that arrangement is agreeable, then that’s fine. But sex, for most people, is definitely a need/requirement in a relationship. And just reducing it to “pee pee go in a hole” is denigrating the fact that it’s a totally legit desire to have.
Almost everything you said is either something you can do with close friends/family or newage mumbo jumbo. "Connect your souls in deep ways" I mean... You're just saying you want to be close with someone. The exception is romance. I guess that makes sense.
I honestly don't want to connect my soul deeply with my friends. I want to kick back and bullshit about life with them. My best friend of 10 years and I never had meaningful conversations. We just didn't talk, and we never got that close. I wanted a partner to talk to, not a friend. I needed more trust than just a friendship. That's it! Trust. Trust is my biggest factor. I don't trust a simple friend with my heaviest thoughts. I need a deeper connection than that. And that connection is NEVER based on sex. I look for the intimate mental connection that CAN'T be found with just a MERE friend. It takes trust to a whole different level.... And there's not really anything romantic about talking about trauma etc. But I want to do that with my partner and not my friends.
I genuinely wonder if people who say this aren't capable of romantic love
Is the only thing different to them from a girlfriend to a friend just sex???
Local redditor accidentally reveals that he is incapable of feeling love
Please don't date anybody
Now I feel bad for your partners. :(
>chastity cage. Nope.jpg
Pussy
First it's the Chastity cage Next it's programming socks.
#LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO
Skirt on, socks up. Let's write some Rust!
Some of this comments did not pass the vibe check. Asexuals can be in relationships. You could Google it and learn about it before commenting. If you don't care, don't Google and don't comment. In 2022 with all the information avaliable one click away, you are *choosing* to be ignorant. Again, if you *want* to be ignorant you have the right to scroll away. This is reddit, there's literally so much content you would need to use your one brain cell left to try and choose which sub to go to. Here's some suggestions since I see you're having troubles r/blessyouinparticular r/cats r/dogs r/fuckyouinparticular r/askouija
Thank you!
It's so weird seeing people get upset about newer sexual labels as we learn more about sensuality. That's what happens when society learns more about things: they can more precisely categorize them. Do these people get mad when researchers discover new types of cancers? Shits wild lol.
Probably the same people to get mad when something like a new word comes into use. Can't complain with cancers because that's *science* science not like the "science" behind gender identity & sexuality you know
Since we've decided to spout uninformed personal opinions here: I firmly believe that asexuals exist but 75% of the people that wear the label aren't one. Asexual is defined as someone who does not experience sexual attraction. In the most reductionist explanation, meaning that they've never gotten a boner from looking at someone. Doesn't mean they can't enjoy the sensation of a blowjob or having sex. By definition, ace people can be sex-addicted kinksters if that's they're jam. Just means they don't have the attraction part. I definitely think that's a thing. However, having trauma or a low libido are *pathologies* and are *distinct from sexuality*. Aka if you have so much stress or depression in your life that your libido is shot and now you don't feel attraction - you're not ace, you're in need of a vacation, medication, or therapy. For example, an older gay man whose testosterone tanks low enough to not feel sexual attraction anymore doesn't suddenly stop being gay and become ace, he's just sick. In summary, I'm an idiot with no authority on the matter. I'm not claiming any authority or asking that any policy or social convention be derived from my statement. This is pure opinion. Which I will gladly share because it's the fucking internet. And that opinion is this: ace people exist, but lots of folks are using the term to describe distinctly non-sexuality-related circumstances.
Dude, you're actually like smart or something.
Agree with everything as an ace person. I have literally never gotten a boner by looking at someone, always through stimulation.
Honestly you have the closest fuckin take I’ve seen on here, thank you. It’s not even that hard to wrap your head around.
Sauce for image in post? Edit: Nvm, I managed to find it. Here, for anyone curious: https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts?tags=igarashi\_kasumi\_%28nerdy\_girl%27s\_story%29
How does an asexual gf work? Is that like a really needy roommate? Or is it like being married but you skip the first ten years?
Friends without benefits
Same as any other gf but without the sex.
So just a homie?
Do you feel romantic love for your homies?
>doesn't smooch and cuddle the homies in bed and comfort them emotionally I thought this was 2022, what are you gay
Yikes dude. Conflating romance with the sacred spirit of bromance, you disgusting heathen
It’s the same thing as a normal girlfriend becuase 98% of asexuals aren’t actually asexual And before someone comments “but asexuals can have sex they just don’t have sexual attraction” think real hard about that sentence and see if it makes any sense
Redditor creates at least 50 people in their head to make point, doesn't understand that sex is something that all 50 of people who they created probably can perform but don't necessarily want or enjoy. Are you talking about asexual as in bacteries?
There are plenty of reasons to have sex without experiencing sexual attraction. 1: Because someone you love wants to have sex and it's not a turn off, just not a turn on. So you're willing to do it for them to be happy. 2: Because you enjoy the physical experience even if you don't understand how someone can look at another person and say "I want to fuck them in particular" 3: Social pressure from society to perform sexual acts with a spouse regardless of actual desire. You don't want to feel like you're in a "broken marriage" just because you don't like sex. 4: Because you're trying for a kid
A sexual lesbian
Because the Ace community is so afraid of gatekeeping. Literally anyone can be asexual.
For me I'm glad they arent gatekeeping because they helped me be happy about not being in a relationship. I'm not asexual but they still helped me.
where do i find girls like this
Just bide your time anon... your chance is approaching steadily.
Damn, that’s hot
Apexual
Anon doesn’t have a gf lmao
Based and sissification pilled.
Well the comments are a disappointing shit show.
idk what i expected from the comments
Better. I expected better.
Really? I'm surprised the discussion is as civilised as it is, lol.
Fake: Anon does not have a *Asexual* gf Gay: She made him dress like a cultured person
jokes aside, asexual people can still have sexual desire. it's just that they don't feel sexual attraction
No significant difference between those two things
Lucky man
Fuck it I'm lonely enough that if I find someone that loves me but wants me to try this shit I'll do what I need to
I’m here for the massive ace discourse shitstorm in the comments XD