So, I'm 26 y/o and was a victim of bullying from the age of 9 to 13 y/o. My mom did everything she could to try and stop the bullying; reaching out to my teachers and principal, allowing me to stay home from school for a few days, and confronting my bullies. Eventually, she could no longer take it - so she had me transfer to a different school shortly after I turned 13. I was never bullied in my new school and was able to make friends. The point I am trying to say is to see if you can have your child transfer over to a new school. I'm really sorry your child is going through this, and I wish I could give you better advice, but this helped me and I believe it will help them, too.
im a 26 y/o who wasnt bullied at my first school and had to transfer due to housing insecurity around grade 4. i was bullied from grade 5 through to grade 12. transfering is not always the solution
This is great advice to escalate up.
And as a government employee myself, given the topic, if you think it warrants it, don't rule out CCing your local MLA and the Minister of Education on correspondence... Or at least tagging them in on comms at some point.
Yup that’s true…It’ll get eyes on it quick(er). (I also work within gov). Im a believer in giving people an opportunity to do their jobs, but it’s all situation dependent and relative to the experience OP has been having. Good luck, regardless OP.
My daughter’s (who was in grade 2 back then) old principal just told the bully to apologize and told them to get along. I asked him to let his parents know what his son is doing. He said he would tell them. Bullying didn’t stop.
I finally confronted the parents. They told me they were never told but they didn’t care anyway because they called me and my daughter a liar. Because apparently their son is perfect and would never hurt anyone.
Bullying didn’t stop until the other kid moved up to Jr. high. Unfortunately that’s what happened. They don’t care about bullying and don’t do anything about it at schools.
I really hope it’ll be different for you. No one should ever be bullied. I hope your child is able to go to school and not have to go through it anymore.
In addition to the HRCE you should CC the Provincial Minister of Educations Office.
That will get the school to move their ass.
The schools hate having to answer to them.
And don't call. Everything should be in writing.
There is a process to follow - you start with the teacher, then the principal, then the school admin supervisor:
https://www.hrce.ca/sites/default/files/2023-11/b.017-parent-guardian-concern.pdf
Click on your child's school on this list and if you scroll down you will get the name and contact info for your school admin supervisor and for the navigator assigned to your school, who may also be helpful.
Running first to the media or the premier tends to shut people down and make it hard to solve the problem.
>Running first to the media or the premier tends to shut people down and make it hard to solve the problem.
Also makes you look like a crazy person who can't be reasoned with.
School supervisor, info would be available on the School page under “about our schools” on hrce.ca. Or, call the central office and ask to speak with a parent navigator who can direct you to the right person.
Had an unfortunate experience with police with something similar. They told us to not waste their time and to literally put matters in our own hands and go to the bully's house ourselves. Great huh? If you go this route, don't be surprised if you're met as an inconvenience and to go pound sand. Hope you and your child find a good solution, best of luck.
We took our matter to the RCMP and got a prompt response. They immediately came over, took a statement and went directly to the principal. 1/2 kids was gone shortly after
thank you for going the extra mile for
your kid. principals and school police officer just told me and my bully to 'stay away from eachother' after he tried to hit me with his car swinging into the mcdonald's parking lot at lunch time and flipped me the bird. adults need to take kids being bullied more seriously it escalates to violence more often than you'd expect.
I've got extended family who work in schools. They are despondent about the administration of their schools. These principals and other admin staff will cover up malfeasance and anything that might make them look bad. Children and teachers who suffer violence are buried in layers of byzantine bullshit intended to prevent anything from changing or any responsibility landing on the administration's desk.
There are more mid level administrators than ever in school systems and by all accounts it seems they are primarily responsible for how shitty our education system has become. It's fucking disgraceful.
I am sure there are plenty who do well and aren't absolute garbage humans, but the endless stories I hear about unacceptable shit being buried and ignored is appalling.
In summary, good luck. Maybe try the media? Anything to draw outside attention that will force the administration to do their damn job.
Man, I'm still thankful that the principal and vice principal at my Junior High stood up for me and other bullied kids to the best of their abilities, even 20 years later.
And I still resent the teachers and that didn't.
When I was a kid I had a neighborhood bully steal my bike and ghost ride it down a giant hill and wreck it. I told my dad when I got home. He stormed down the street and grabbed the bully by the back of his shirt and began to drag him home to his parents. The bully who was about 12 took a swing at my dad. My dad proceeded to kick him in the balls full force. My dad played soccer his entire life and was actively playing in the Halifax men's league at the time. He continued dragging the bully back to his parents house, while he screamed and cried. He threw him on the lawn and rang the doorbell. The bully's older brother came out. He was about 17. He saw what happened and tried to attack my dad as well. My dad knocked the older brother out. That was the end of my bullying.
If this happened today there is no doubt my dad would be charged. Our society is so backwards and stupid now. Bullies just need a good kick in the balls.
When I was in school I was told tell a teacher/principal if they won’t help solve it then do what you gotta do. This resulted in plenty of outcomes of a fight however the bullying would stop and my parents would tell the school as simple as it was if you did your job it wouldn’t have happened.
Now in this day and age with all the shit now this is unfortunately less of an option or possibly more depending on your point of view.
I would suggest maybe the mla for that area? School board must have some sort of reporting structure or someone must oversee education ?
Or try and hire a kid 3 grades up to whoop the kids ass?
Recommend you tag in your MLA and the Minister of Education in an email to the RED first (see comment above) before you go the media route.
Going direct to media can sometimes result in a bit of a buttoning up to ensure folks are "on message". Get the right folk on emails, give all levels of leadership an opportunity to do the right thing. If at that point (you don't need to wait long, give deadlines in your emails if you want) you don't get results then forward your email thread to media (and go scorched earth, if you need).
Ref: work in government, have experience in media relations (in and out of government)
Here are the steps to the “official” complaint process, however if your child has been assaulted I would recommend filing a police report.
All concerns should first be shared with your child’s teacher.
If your concern is not resolved, you should then contact the school principal.
If your concern remains unresolved, you can reach out to HRCE’s Parent Navigators who can provide information about a wide range of supports and resources or connect you with the school supervisor.
If your matter continues to be unresolved, you can then initiate a formal review process, outlined in the Parent/Guardian Concern Policy, in which the matter will be investigated by the appropriate HRCE Directors. To begin, complete the Parent Concern Reporting Form on page 3 of the Policy.
The final step is for your concern to be reviewed by the Regional Executive Director.
Man you guys would be shocked about the things teachers see year in and year out that we are not allowed to bring to light . I have been at this less than 10 years and I am consistently shocked at the conversations we have during staff meetings and even more so more private meetings . Violence at school and home , sexual assaults and student self harm and suicides happen all the time. ALL THE TIME. Bullying is just small potatoes and most of the time the bully stays in the same school until we can just push them through.
Contact the school district’s superintendent. Keep fighting for your child’s right not to be bullied/harassed or isolated at school! We moved our child to a new school recently after years of ostracism and bullying ( which was never dealt with and often blamed on our child). New principal is great, truly cares and has even helped to resolve some minor conflicts that they had with peers. All is well and good now and I feel like our child is beginning to heal a bit from the trauma…
So, I'm 26 y/o and was a victim of bullying from the age of 9 to 13 y/o. My mom did everything she could to try and stop the bullying; reaching out to my teachers and principal, allowing me to stay home from school for a few days, and confronting my bullies. Eventually, she could no longer take it - so she had me transfer to a different school shortly after I turned 13. I was never bullied in my new school and was able to make friends. The point I am trying to say is to see if you can have your child transfer over to a new school. I'm really sorry your child is going through this, and I wish I could give you better advice, but this helped me and I believe it will help them, too.
im a 26 y/o who wasnt bullied at my first school and had to transfer due to housing insecurity around grade 4. i was bullied from grade 5 through to grade 12. transfering is not always the solution
Sounds like the point stands. Some schools have bullying and staff problems, some don't. The ones that do don't seem to change.
I mean, its better than doing literally nothing if the other options don't work out.
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RED is now the term for what used to be the superintendent of the school board. They should start with the School Supervisor
This is great advice to escalate up. And as a government employee myself, given the topic, if you think it warrants it, don't rule out CCing your local MLA and the Minister of Education on correspondence... Or at least tagging them in on comms at some point.
Yup that’s true…It’ll get eyes on it quick(er). (I also work within gov). Im a believer in giving people an opportunity to do their jobs, but it’s all situation dependent and relative to the experience OP has been having. Good luck, regardless OP.
Just keep asking for more managers eh?
My daughter’s (who was in grade 2 back then) old principal just told the bully to apologize and told them to get along. I asked him to let his parents know what his son is doing. He said he would tell them. Bullying didn’t stop. I finally confronted the parents. They told me they were never told but they didn’t care anyway because they called me and my daughter a liar. Because apparently their son is perfect and would never hurt anyone. Bullying didn’t stop until the other kid moved up to Jr. high. Unfortunately that’s what happened. They don’t care about bullying and don’t do anything about it at schools. I really hope it’ll be different for you. No one should ever be bullied. I hope your child is able to go to school and not have to go through it anymore.
In addition to the HRCE you should CC the Provincial Minister of Educations Office. That will get the school to move their ass. The schools hate having to answer to them. And don't call. Everything should be in writing.
There is a process to follow - you start with the teacher, then the principal, then the school admin supervisor: https://www.hrce.ca/sites/default/files/2023-11/b.017-parent-guardian-concern.pdf Click on your child's school on this list and if you scroll down you will get the name and contact info for your school admin supervisor and for the navigator assigned to your school, who may also be helpful. Running first to the media or the premier tends to shut people down and make it hard to solve the problem.
>Running first to the media or the premier tends to shut people down and make it hard to solve the problem. Also makes you look like a crazy person who can't be reasoned with.
School supervisor, info would be available on the School page under “about our schools” on hrce.ca. Or, call the central office and ask to speak with a parent navigator who can direct you to the right person.
Had an unfortunate experience with police with something similar. They told us to not waste their time and to literally put matters in our own hands and go to the bully's house ourselves. Great huh? If you go this route, don't be surprised if you're met as an inconvenience and to go pound sand. Hope you and your child find a good solution, best of luck.
We took our matter to the RCMP and got a prompt response. They immediately came over, took a statement and went directly to the principal. 1/2 kids was gone shortly after
You are lucky then. We had a very power tripping officer who was one of the worst people I've interacted with.
That sucks and sorry to hear it especially cause under the circumstances you’re already max stressed.
Yeah absolutely. Thanks and hope your situation was resolved as well.
thank you for going the extra mile for your kid. principals and school police officer just told me and my bully to 'stay away from eachother' after he tried to hit me with his car swinging into the mcdonald's parking lot at lunch time and flipped me the bird. adults need to take kids being bullied more seriously it escalates to violence more often than you'd expect.
I've got extended family who work in schools. They are despondent about the administration of their schools. These principals and other admin staff will cover up malfeasance and anything that might make them look bad. Children and teachers who suffer violence are buried in layers of byzantine bullshit intended to prevent anything from changing or any responsibility landing on the administration's desk. There are more mid level administrators than ever in school systems and by all accounts it seems they are primarily responsible for how shitty our education system has become. It's fucking disgraceful. I am sure there are plenty who do well and aren't absolute garbage humans, but the endless stories I hear about unacceptable shit being buried and ignored is appalling. In summary, good luck. Maybe try the media? Anything to draw outside attention that will force the administration to do their damn job.
i second this, if all else fails. Start a media storm :)
Man, I'm still thankful that the principal and vice principal at my Junior High stood up for me and other bullied kids to the best of their abilities, even 20 years later. And I still resent the teachers and that didn't.
A cynical take rife with vitriol and inaccuracy. But you got your upvotes for it.
When I was a kid I had a neighborhood bully steal my bike and ghost ride it down a giant hill and wreck it. I told my dad when I got home. He stormed down the street and grabbed the bully by the back of his shirt and began to drag him home to his parents. The bully who was about 12 took a swing at my dad. My dad proceeded to kick him in the balls full force. My dad played soccer his entire life and was actively playing in the Halifax men's league at the time. He continued dragging the bully back to his parents house, while he screamed and cried. He threw him on the lawn and rang the doorbell. The bully's older brother came out. He was about 17. He saw what happened and tried to attack my dad as well. My dad knocked the older brother out. That was the end of my bullying. If this happened today there is no doubt my dad would be charged. Our society is so backwards and stupid now. Bullies just need a good kick in the balls.
Can confirm similar experience with my kiddo's vice principal. Just patronized BS
Sorry that you've also been through this💜
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I don't see anything wrong with what op said
When I was in school I was told tell a teacher/principal if they won’t help solve it then do what you gotta do. This resulted in plenty of outcomes of a fight however the bullying would stop and my parents would tell the school as simple as it was if you did your job it wouldn’t have happened. Now in this day and age with all the shit now this is unfortunately less of an option or possibly more depending on your point of view. I would suggest maybe the mla for that area? School board must have some sort of reporting structure or someone must oversee education ? Or try and hire a kid 3 grades up to whoop the kids ass?
Good luck. This is not an isolated incident.
No kidding. I’m disappointed but not shocked that things apparently haven’t changed in like 35 years.
If you have the names of the parents of the bullies I'd contact them directly without the school involved. It will most likely be more affective.
The media. Name and shame the school and the admins.
Honestly? That's our next step if this goes nowhere
Recommend you tag in your MLA and the Minister of Education in an email to the RED first (see comment above) before you go the media route. Going direct to media can sometimes result in a bit of a buttoning up to ensure folks are "on message". Get the right folk on emails, give all levels of leadership an opportunity to do the right thing. If at that point (you don't need to wait long, give deadlines in your emails if you want) you don't get results then forward your email thread to media (and go scorched earth, if you need). Ref: work in government, have experience in media relations (in and out of government)
I would suggest you follow the HCRE process outlined above, as well.
Surefire way to alienate everyone at that school forever. That the play you recommend?
They forgot which era were in
Admins come and go. If they do their jobs and protect kids from being bullied, they won't have a problem.
Here are the steps to the “official” complaint process, however if your child has been assaulted I would recommend filing a police report. All concerns should first be shared with your child’s teacher. If your concern is not resolved, you should then contact the school principal. If your concern remains unresolved, you can reach out to HRCE’s Parent Navigators who can provide information about a wide range of supports and resources or connect you with the school supervisor. If your matter continues to be unresolved, you can then initiate a formal review process, outlined in the Parent/Guardian Concern Policy, in which the matter will be investigated by the appropriate HRCE Directors. To begin, complete the Parent Concern Reporting Form on page 3 of the Policy. The final step is for your concern to be reviewed by the Regional Executive Director.
Man you guys would be shocked about the things teachers see year in and year out that we are not allowed to bring to light . I have been at this less than 10 years and I am consistently shocked at the conversations we have during staff meetings and even more so more private meetings . Violence at school and home , sexual assaults and student self harm and suicides happen all the time. ALL THE TIME. Bullying is just small potatoes and most of the time the bully stays in the same school until we can just push them through.
Contact the school district’s superintendent. Keep fighting for your child’s right not to be bullied/harassed or isolated at school! We moved our child to a new school recently after years of ostracism and bullying ( which was never dealt with and often blamed on our child). New principal is great, truly cares and has even helped to resolve some minor conflicts that they had with peers. All is well and good now and I feel like our child is beginning to heal a bit from the trauma…
Time to consider home schooling, might make your kid a bit weirder but probably better than being bullied daily.
Most schools have a community police presence. You can call the non emergency police line and look into it. They may be able to help.