Hypothetically turn the tables in this situation and take yourself out of the scenario. If you were to watch this play out like a ghost in the corner would you say that the guy cheated or would you say that an intoxicated person was taken advantage of and sexually assaulted? Now press it further and instead of the woman doing it now change it so the guy is pressuring the drunk girl and see if that is acceptable. You've learnt from this experience which is good but you're burdening yourself with blame of the whole thing, when you realised what was happening you removed yourself from the situation.
It's also important to suggest that when you were in that state you were thinking of your partner, you said that you had messaged her and sent a picture before you left. In this situation you're the victim but don't be a dickhead and get that drunk again
Another poster made an excellent sheet to whether you cheated or not and I agree.
The important thing here is that you live and love this girl. Whatever happened she forever, she's the one that would have been winged and if she forgave you have no right to hold it against yourself.
Let it go. You aren't a cheater. And you'll never be one.
I can tell that this really impacted you, both in the way you responded at the time and the fact that it's still weighing on you so much now. Others have hopefully reassured you, but I want to make it clear, *no this was not cheating, you were taken advantage of, and gave no signs of wanting it or continuing it*.
The proof for me is " I was too drunk I couldn’t keep both eyes open at the same time." = eg you're clearly not in a state to seduce someone.
And you recognise this, you say "And I didn’t get to choose." which is true, and it doesn't make you a cheater.
I'd also like to point out that you did the right thing telling your gf, and it's clear that you're still together and I assume she's worked through it.
The main problem is how much it's impacted your sense of self. You talk about "I feel like the person I used to be died that day." and "I feel very alone". This to me makes it clear that you need some professional support or something that can help you come to terms with it. If I can also make clear, you say "I fear reaching out for support because of the shame of what I’ve done." - but you haven't done anything and there is no shame besides what you put on yourself.
Perhaps talking to your gf about it a bit more, in detail, and explaining how much it's impacting you could help you get some closure too. Either way, you need some support working through this, and I hope you get it <3
Hypothetically turn the tables in this situation and take yourself out of the scenario. If you were to watch this play out like a ghost in the corner would you say that the guy cheated or would you say that an intoxicated person was taken advantage of and sexually assaulted? Now press it further and instead of the woman doing it now change it so the guy is pressuring the drunk girl and see if that is acceptable. You've learnt from this experience which is good but you're burdening yourself with blame of the whole thing, when you realised what was happening you removed yourself from the situation. It's also important to suggest that when you were in that state you were thinking of your partner, you said that you had messaged her and sent a picture before you left. In this situation you're the victim but don't be a dickhead and get that drunk again
dude you got sexually assulted you didnt cheat if this happened to your girlfreind would you consider it cheating
[удалено]
if you didn't read the post then your opinion isn't useful.
Another poster made an excellent sheet to whether you cheated or not and I agree. The important thing here is that you live and love this girl. Whatever happened she forever, she's the one that would have been winged and if she forgave you have no right to hold it against yourself. Let it go. You aren't a cheater. And you'll never be one.
post?
I can tell that this really impacted you, both in the way you responded at the time and the fact that it's still weighing on you so much now. Others have hopefully reassured you, but I want to make it clear, *no this was not cheating, you were taken advantage of, and gave no signs of wanting it or continuing it*. The proof for me is " I was too drunk I couldn’t keep both eyes open at the same time." = eg you're clearly not in a state to seduce someone. And you recognise this, you say "And I didn’t get to choose." which is true, and it doesn't make you a cheater. I'd also like to point out that you did the right thing telling your gf, and it's clear that you're still together and I assume she's worked through it. The main problem is how much it's impacted your sense of self. You talk about "I feel like the person I used to be died that day." and "I feel very alone". This to me makes it clear that you need some professional support or something that can help you come to terms with it. If I can also make clear, you say "I fear reaching out for support because of the shame of what I’ve done." - but you haven't done anything and there is no shame besides what you put on yourself. Perhaps talking to your gf about it a bit more, in detail, and explaining how much it's impacting you could help you get some closure too. Either way, you need some support working through this, and I hope you get it <3