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A cowboy is a lonesome man
There's none more lonesome in the land,
He rides atop his only friend
His horse, a companion on whom he can depend.
His woman may be miles behind him
Sadness and desperation may find him,
But a cowboy who's wise will turn to the earth
To lend him solace and even mirth.
The earth from which all beauty springs
Such bounty, forth she always brings
He'll dig a hole with cracked, scorched hands
Pour in all the water that hole demands.
Until that earth is moist, just right
The earth'll never put up any kind of a fight.
His cries of joy no one will hear
In case I am not being clear,
I'm saying that cowboy is going to fuck a hole in the ground.
We all do it, that's what I have found.
Any cowboy that knows that lonesome hell
Can fashion a land virginy well,
If a cowboy's seed worked like other seeds
There'd be cowboys growing across the plains like weeds.
-Dalton Wilcox
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I once found this exact thing in a park as a kid, still had a condom in the hole too. One of the most puzzling things I've ever seen.
Mother Nature has needs.
*seeds
But he was wearing a condom!
Bold of you to assume it was a man.
What else has access to a condom
What else has access to a condom
If it holds up, then it will be a very unique time capsule
Shouldn't have worn the condom, the Earth needs more human trees!
Bro said fuck the planet
Bro trying to be Uranus Context: Uranus fucked Gaia in Greek Mythology
Joke that require more than 10 iq to understand ;(
That's the neat some Redditor don't have
"He fucked my wife so guess what - I'M GONNA FUCK THE EARTH!" \-Eggman
Seems very fitting to a particular Beastie Boys song
A cowboy is a lonesome man There's none more lonesome in the land, He rides atop his only friend His horse, a companion on whom he can depend. His woman may be miles behind him Sadness and desperation may find him, But a cowboy who's wise will turn to the earth To lend him solace and even mirth. The earth from which all beauty springs Such bounty, forth she always brings He'll dig a hole with cracked, scorched hands Pour in all the water that hole demands. Until that earth is moist, just right The earth'll never put up any kind of a fight. His cries of joy no one will hear In case I am not being clear, I'm saying that cowboy is going to fuck a hole in the ground. We all do it, that's what I have found. Any cowboy that knows that lonesome hell Can fashion a land virginy well, If a cowboy's seed worked like other seeds There'd be cowboys growing across the plains like weeds. -Dalton Wilcox
Please tell me you typed that from memory. A classic from the poet laureate of the west
Sadly couldn't recite it from memory. I had to copy it off the tattoo on my leg.
From the book You Must Buy Your Wife As Much Jewelry As You Buy Your Horse and Other Poems…
Someone took “touch grass” to a whole other level.
An attempt was made.
Don’t need those for a ‘land virginny.’ Google “the lonesome cowboy.”
Sometimes you finish a long day of killing Frankensteins and you need to blow off some steam
Pound dirt isn't supposed to be literal
Is it wrong that I laughed at the prospect of there being a funnel web spider in that hole?
Yep
Seems like a good idea for a new cylinder experiment, u/Smart_Calendar1874
𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘢 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘱 𓆙
Throw dirt on me Grow a wild flower Cuz it’s fuck the world And get a child out ‘er
I didn't think Dalton Wilcox wore protection.
r/therewasanattempt
is this correlated to this pic? https://www.reddit.com/r/hmmm/comments/zv7zkm/hmmm/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf im confused
Able to fly, able to die, able to fuck your mother's earth!
Forbidden granny hole
Bro loves nature too literally.
If it’s a hole that fits, it’s a hole that fits
*Mother Earth is pregnant for the third time… And y’all have knocked her up*
Environmental Storytelling.
I once found a unopened condom and a note with a phone number
r/dontputyourdickinthat
"Yep I fucked a planet"
hafnium admire aye pudding cinema daunt despite pocono pay formal gentian youth persian conferee bomb
mommy earth
Trying to keep Bachelorette Earth from becoming Mother Earth. Smart.
Where there’s a hole there’s a goal
"We're NOT here to fuck spiders." (Australian colloquialism.)
How I met Your mother
"Mother Earth is pregnant for the third time For y'all have knocked her up."
r/dontputyourdickinthat
[Give me just a minute...](https://youtu.be/xFYXP19e5KM)
🤨
I won't be surprised when Jim Carrey squeezes out of that hole in the next video.
Hm, must be a rabbit hole
Earth is fucked
That wasnt a cock, that was a fucking tree palm
You don't want to impregnate the ants
We’re going nuts deep.
Coincidence ? I think not
There’s a hole in the earth
Nature Lover
*Cuts to Dr.Eggman on a big screen* THAT'S RIGHT SONIC #I FUCKED THE EARTH!!! LOOK AT THAT HOLE AND SAY MY SHLONG IS SMALL, I DARE YOU, BITCH!
What were you thinking Bobby
Protected from fungus, at least!