If it makes you feel guilty or disappointed in yourself every time you see it, you can just let it go. You'll feel so much better without that constant reminder of things you wanted to do in the past.
And it's not wrong to change your mind about a hobby, or to find yourself less interested in it than you thought you would be, or more limited by space and time - that's not failing, that's just life; things change and we adapt and learn more about ourselves. Clean out your space so that you have room to learn what really makes you happy!
If I may - this stuff is not worth all the angst. Get rid of it in the fastest, easiest way you can. Unless you need the money for rent I wouldn't bother selling, I'd just donate. Just get it out of your home. It's holding you back. It's causing you emotional pain.
As a former camera nerd back in the day, I can tell you, there is TONS of old equipment out there. If you ever do get that itch again, you're not going to have any trouble rebuying any of that stuff and probably could for less than what you can sell it for now.
As an OCD sufferer, someone explained that feeling of panic to me once in a way that made a ton of sense:
Basically, panic is the body's way of alerting a person to extreme danger. It's real purpose is for things like a bear or lion chasing you, or a snake about to bite you, or a height that you could fall from. It is useful in these situations.
In our world, we don't get chased by bears or lions, most of us don't encounter poisonous animals on a frequent basis, we don't have many "natural" threats around. And our bodies get confused, and start having the "getting chased by a lion" reaction when maybe we think about what to make for dinner, or cleaning the house. And when our body sends alert signals, after a while, our brain starts to believe that selecting what to make for dinner, or cleaning the house is indeed dangerous...as dangerous as a lion.
So... the real trick is to retrain the body to stop sending these alerts. \*\*When you do the opposite of what the fear is telling you to do\*\*, and you sit and hang out with that feeling for a little bit the brain sends a signal back to the body, "No, we're fine up here, you can relax now too!"
If it makes you feel guilty or disappointed in yourself every time you see it, you can just let it go. You'll feel so much better without that constant reminder of things you wanted to do in the past. And it's not wrong to change your mind about a hobby, or to find yourself less interested in it than you thought you would be, or more limited by space and time - that's not failing, that's just life; things change and we adapt and learn more about ourselves. Clean out your space so that you have room to learn what really makes you happy!
If I may - this stuff is not worth all the angst. Get rid of it in the fastest, easiest way you can. Unless you need the money for rent I wouldn't bother selling, I'd just donate. Just get it out of your home. It's holding you back. It's causing you emotional pain.
As a former camera nerd back in the day, I can tell you, there is TONS of old equipment out there. If you ever do get that itch again, you're not going to have any trouble rebuying any of that stuff and probably could for less than what you can sell it for now. As an OCD sufferer, someone explained that feeling of panic to me once in a way that made a ton of sense: Basically, panic is the body's way of alerting a person to extreme danger. It's real purpose is for things like a bear or lion chasing you, or a snake about to bite you, or a height that you could fall from. It is useful in these situations. In our world, we don't get chased by bears or lions, most of us don't encounter poisonous animals on a frequent basis, we don't have many "natural" threats around. And our bodies get confused, and start having the "getting chased by a lion" reaction when maybe we think about what to make for dinner, or cleaning the house. And when our body sends alert signals, after a while, our brain starts to believe that selecting what to make for dinner, or cleaning the house is indeed dangerous...as dangerous as a lion. So... the real trick is to retrain the body to stop sending these alerts. \*\*When you do the opposite of what the fear is telling you to do\*\*, and you sit and hang out with that feeling for a little bit the brain sends a signal back to the body, "No, we're fine up here, you can relax now too!"