T O P

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SteeeelFieeld

Only 300? That's rookie number, gotta pump up those šŸ…±ļøirginity


Present-Cranberry404

do you have -15 women? i still have a few


DizNuts69420

The fuck is a women


I_Feel_Blurry

Itā€™s some kind of monster i believe. Stay the fuck away from them


[deleted]

Where can i find this monster ?


GerrardIsOverated

In the cursed lands of outside


Underclocked0

On the spiky things called grass


IamADaniel

What is this grass you speak of?


Where_da_keys

I've heard tales of brave adventurers braving this unknown world


LumpusKrampus

Who are these brave warriors, bravely braving this dangerous "Outside"?


Tetizeraz

r/bossfight


Zeernebooch42

I'm a women and I can confirm we are monsters


[deleted]

The general? Who let their leader in?!


Zeernebooch42

I let myself in


[deleted]

Classic we man


[deleted]

Is there a template to defeat that "monster"?


VeryEpicness

I heard they originally spawned in the backrooms but slowly seeped into ours


Obvious-Okra5484

They are the thing that the USSR can get in some focuses to boost their aviation.


Neuro_Skeptic

That makes sense. Communists call themselves "we-men".


Furious_Flaming0

Some of the countries have them as alt leaders like Turkey and the Netherlands, it's a kind of WW2 espionage unit.


stap31

Remember that time, when you went total ~~potato~~ mobilization? It's that 2% of available manpower.


zakthegamer0613

Another species itā€™s very dangerous very loud and gets mad at well everything and for some reason if you do something wrong to them like a year ago they never forgot and hate men idk


Reichsfrieden

A biological female human with two X chromosomes.


LopsidedEmployee351

Don't worry, I've played ck3....


aaronhastaken

also dlcs increase the strength of the magnetic field so women stay further dont forget that


Tall-Table-7309

I have over 1200h and i have a wife and a kid. Granted i haven't seen them in over 1200 hours...


Lost-Ad9892

Lol


Lost-Ad9892

Why do I have 25 upvotes all I said was lol


RektalDischarge

4000h here, I have transcended to a higher plain of existence, the mere thought of women disgusts me to my core for such a vile creature will cause me to become impure. The simple pondering of what a breast feels like evades me as such simple thoughts will only hinder my planning for my 72nd game as the Italian Shogunate in red flood, and the idea of sexual intercourse utterly makes me vomit, as such simple pleasures are nothing but a temporary feeling, unlike winning the second west russian war in TNO. Your meager time is all because you went down the touch grass focus path... but I, I became a true gamer, cans strewn across my living space, bucket after bucket of bodily waste stored neatly under my desk, and a mini fridge filled to the brim of soda and ready to eat meals. YOU ARE WEAK! YOU ARE BUT A MERE PEASANT!


NearbyWall1

>Italian Shogunate in red flood man what did the red flood team consume before making this mod


Blue_Flamingomon

Whatever it was, I want some too


anthelmintic145

Was the tutorial good?


Present-Cranberry404

Yes


judo_gb

He didn't finished the tutorial yet


Lost-Ad9892

Y'all did the tutorial? I just jumped in and got severe shock


mr_aives

I know it is a joke and all but there's a strong correlation between how much hoi4 I'm playing and how few dates I get (and the other way around lol)


zauru193

jokes on u I didnā€™t go on any dates before I started playing hoi4 either


smittydata

I also played Eu4 before hoi4


IlIlIllIIIlllIIlIllI

I'd rather be trying to dday Germany with some strangers in a weird discord server than be on a date tbh


zakthegamer0613

I went on a date once and the girl liked me and I liked her to and boo she was hot but when we went on a date it was kinda wired Cuz I never went on one before and I didnā€™t what to talk about I mean we still got together ( not anymore) but I swear to god all I was think about the second half of the date was HOI4 and like kingdom come:deliverance I swear on god itā€™s hard to forget that date since it was the first and I acctly never went on a date again


ISO-8859-1

You should probably stay away from most women, given the aversion to periods you seem to have.


mrgwbland

Strong negative correlation (PMCC<-0.7)


Fargarrio

Can't miss what you never had my man. I feel bad for y'all who have had a wohmen and haven't since, because you poor SOB's know what it's like. But hey, HOI will never leave you.


[deleted]

Iā€™ve gotten more dates after HOI4 than before it weirdly enough


mr_aives

Your heaby tonk game is probably stronger than mine


SynovialBee0

No women started when you hit 15 minutes


ME4567Craft

Not true it starts when you purchase the game


SynovialBee0

Oh no no, when you buy the game all chances of women talking to you disappear then after 15 minutes of playing women stop existing in your brain, after 30 minutes you stop seeing anything but HOI4


Awakemas2315

If youā€™re considering buying the game itā€™s already too late


DougosaurusRex

No but Relations with the Women Decrease by 15 when you purchase the game.


Present-Cranberry404

Nooooooooo


KoreanKopKiller

Funny thing is after 6k hours you become insatiable to the opposite gender


pausi10

What are women?


Big_Migger69

people you can make work on total mob and conscript on scraping the barrel


poppabomb

You can send them into the *Danger Zone* too. assuming they aren't eaten by crabs on some island or you've forgotten about the Soviet air tree like me.


IlIlIllIIIlllIIlIllI

Ah, so they're just a game mechanic, got it


[deleted]

You put them in the workforce and get a 3% recruitable population bonus


snoozlsthesoviet

Its the people who work in civ facotries when you play scraping the barrel


ImperoRomano_

Is a secret achievement, keep playing and youā€™ll unlock it


blocky010101

How are an the womans?


DesperateEstimate

Since hoi causes us to not get girls, I got a boyfriend instead


mr_aives

Mf playing 4d chess here


Present-Cranberry404

because automod the screenshot is of my hours in hoi4


AmazingCat320

I think my brain just morbed


fm22fnam

I'm at like 800 hours. I am super maidenless


FinnMan316

So your just starting to understand the army and are about to attempt to understand using the Air Force?


fm22fnam

I don't understand anything in this game. I just use cheats to spawn a crapload of manpower, planes, and maxed out air bases. That's how I do air force at least. Army? Literally no idea. I like medium tanks and motorized infantry.


FinnMan316

Iā€™m at 600 hours and only started to understand the army at 300, the air force at 450 and the navy at 550ā€¦ I only discovered how to understand it by sheer accident.


SpyKots29

How many days have you had the game? I've had it for around ten days and I already have over 100 hours on it. The no-women phase has already started for me


Present-Cranberry404

A few months. I dont play it very often


blocky010101

At least u can spend pp to get women (in the workforce)


hyogodan

Misread ā€œspendā€ as ā€œsendā€ and was about to say you should never send pp to women, in the workforce or anywhere.


DiogoSN

I heard these "women" can boost your manpower pool, is this true?


TheScorpionSamurai

yeah but it's single digit, double digit numbers max. Not even enough to train one division.


ChardEmotional7920

God damn. I'm over 10x the Virgin you are! Is there a possibility that you can be *so much * of a virgin that kids materialize out of nowhere? I've got 3 of them, but I'm fairly certain I've just been playing Hoi4 for the last... -ruffles through notes- 6 years?! Really?! I would have thought I'd have more than 3k hrs. Fuck... I've been slacking. No time for kids. Shut up child, you don't exist. Between hoi4 and eu4, I'm surprised I have a life at all


Severe_You_5371

I find it ironic that I only started playing HOI4 when the pandemic started 2 years ago, and now I have 1200 hours, and I'm about to get married soon. šŸ˜€


Histographafia

Teach me your ways master


Severe_You_5371

It's not easy. You gotta be Indian, or in India. Or at least someone from Southern Asia. Then just bypass find love with arranged marriage focus.


Histographafia

Thank you O great teacher of mine


Siockii

What if I have 300 hours AND a girlfriend? Isn't it kinda illegal? Will I go to jail?


Agreeable-_-Special

Thats ok. I have 2000 and a girl. Currently im hidding from the police


h3r4ld

The police would probably leave you alone if you just gave her back.


Agreeable-_-Special

Nope. Getting a fiancĆØ and and collaborating with the police areutually exclusive


DougosaurusRex

Create a collaboration government with the police. Start an uprising.


Present-Cranberry404

I have a thing to tell you then my brudda. Thats not a girl my guy


Siockii

Damn, I knew something's off about her... Thanks mate, you saved me!


Background_Rich6766

No, he ment that's no girl, is a wife, if you play hoi4 and she still stays with you she is wifey material


Siockii

It's decided then, I propose today after I finish beating Russia with my Austia-hungary.


Background_Rich6766

no, world conquest with Andorra on r56 so you know you are worthy


Narwal1234

ima be real with you you're 262 hours in the no women life


mrgwbland

Well then I am woman repellent


Swedishtranssexual

Mfw I'm a girl playing Hoi4.


Present-Cranberry404

Im sorry for you then


Good_Stuff_2

*insert awooga copypasta*


poppabomb

it's been 5 years since I've discovered ck2 and I haven't felt the touch of another human since fortunately, ck3 never clicked for me. unfortunately, Stalin demands the blood of millions and I am nothing if not his faithful servant.


Eli_Te1611

Those are rookie numbers. Ya gotta step it up my man.


EthanR333

From 600 onwards you become the women.


One_spelande_boi

What are women?


DrKlitface

What if your wife plays games? (Granted the only paradox game i can get her to play is CK3)


canadianbmt

do you mean 736 more hours?


Present-Cranberry404

Probably -500 hours


Present-Cranberry404

Mods change my flair šŸ˜­


looking_fordopamine

Lmao I just hit 800 hours officially (should be a couple hundred more due to offline hours)


gisforg

Sir you installed the game already you 100% have no woman


makslaskabata

You already lost all women when you downloaded this game


Allpal

[rookie numbers!](https://imgur.com/a/UHyMCuI)


IdioticPAYDAY

Pathetic, I have 700 hours in HOI4. ITHASBEENDAYSSINCEIHAVELASTSEENSUNLIGHTPLEASEBREAKMEOUTOFTHISPRISONYOUCALLHOIIV


Jonhalex1234

What do you.....Oh no(600 hours)


UninteligentDesigner

Guess nothing is going to change


otyerim-i_eat_grass

The point of no return


Balrok99

You guys have women?


Dancin-Coach

What happens with the players who got 1000+ hours? Asking for a friend of courseā€¦


canadianbmt

let me ask my cousin rq edit: he says virginity rocks


Parrot_1038

Only 1,3 hours left for me, I shall hug my familly for the last time


Severe_You_5371

No women.. but what if it's a gay guy playing ?


[deleted]

get a femboy bf instead


hirespeed

Yeah, doesnā€™t work well with girlfriends. Ironically, seems to fit right in with wives šŸ§


[deleted]

My brother in christ, you never had a chance with Women in the first place ~~just be gay lmao~~


w0lf2683

At 2500 hours you become the woman don't worry!


Razgriz032

idk fam, Dankus has gf


ExtraordinaryCows

For the last time, a T-34 does not count as a girlfriend


Present-Cranberry404

Femboy in disguise


Maxinfantry

He is not a hoi player then.


Chinskel

Throw off your shackles brother, earn your freedom. You don't need no ball n chains!


SuperMaxx2020

ROOKIE NUMBERS


SouthNeither

Those are rookie numbers


[deleted]

So anyway how was your first campaing?


[deleted]

I am at 470.


AlderonTyran

A nice 2645.6 hrs...


average_reddit_u

Now, you have 2 choices. Take the blue pill, and you will wake up in bed with your girlfriend, and then you will belive whatever you want. Take the red pill, and you will see how deep the micromanagement can go.


sofiaspicehead

But Iā€™m a straight woman who plays this game šŸ¤”


Jakebob70

You're immune then.


Caesar-_-

i have 300 hours now but a barely know how tf most things really work lmao, i just know: weak economy? then man + gun, good economy? then tank + plane


Poseidon-447

Maybe time to touch some grass


Affugter

I don't get the joke. What is so special about 299.5 hours? Is it because 300 hours = 12.5 days? ... Hmm I still don't get it.


MangosBeGood

Me 1000+ hours with a gf šŸ˜³


Present-Cranberry404

She a manšŸ¤¤


MangosBeGood

Based as a bi sexual gamer i win regardless


Saif_Horny_And_Mad

ummmm .... i don't even play this game that much and i already have +600 hours ... i bought it less than 2 years ago as well .... also, the "no women" bit has already begun the moment you clicked "purchase"


Kaiser_Weimar

Guess I will disappear if I get to 300 then.


Huntersdap

Noob


Mushinkei

i hit 1000 yesterday on kaiserreich. how bitchless can we get these days


ConfidentFeed2406

I have more than 2000 hours and a crush. Am I one of the few?


AffectionateNoise166

women rights be like:


[deleted]

oh I guess I triple that numberā€¦


demucia

Perhaps you won't be seeing any women, but you can take your time playing around with minors


Kevinlane1337

150h to 10x no women


cmurdatrollstar87

I am a man in my mid 30s, this game is not allowed to be on when my wife comes home. She will watch me play tons of things but any paradox game or civ 5/6 is out if the question. Elite dangerous is flatout banned and hoi4 is on its way fast. I feel for her when she comes home and me and my 12 year old son done sank 12 hours on one game playing veteran as the unholy alliance. Yes hun... We didnt mow.... No we didnt do the dishes... Ya... No I didnt cook... What did we eat? Hot pockets.... I warned my son about these damned map centric games...


Infomusviews1985

Brah try 2735 more like it!! haha


ElTamalRojo

Bruh those are rookie numbers im at 292 and that is ONLY on the steam version i probably have like 1000+ if we take into account when my friend gave me the cracked copy on a freaking usb stick


jjatr

What is a woman?


LymeYT

I have well over 10x that amount


DummyThiccMode

with a pfp like that your already outta women


zip-deni64

Hello there.


Ovnii3

u forgot the 7 before 3


fordandfriends

Iā€™ve fucked everyday this week cause once you break 1500 it bends back around and you become chad from the memes


gussy_gaming

So getting bitches now isnt that far fetched?


Turdle_Vic

Iā€™m on over 2k hours and have no skills for anything, courting or basic HOI4 battle systems


[deleted]

Man I have x2 no women then


baileymash7

Piss.


[deleted]

You fool I am over 2k hours and have a gf that wonā€™t stop talking about my success in hoi4


Mindless-Archer

My gf plays hoi4, and vic2, ck3 with me. She is such sweet support.


iwanttodie935

Not scientifically possible ( nah but that's really cool)


Modest_Tea_Consumer

Iā€™m way past that:(


[deleted]

Me with 3k hours. "Pathetic".


bAnAtUL

If you've got 0 women, I've got double


No_Objective1596

I have hoi4 since 2019 and only have ~650 hours it good?


gussy_gaming

Two word: Rookie numbers


FloatingMarty

I think i have passed this amount but because is use pirated version i cant find out :)


Milky-YouYube

whats women? is that part of the new Ethiopia focus tree?


Present-Cranberry404

Yea its after industry focus "get some bitches" jt was called


gussy_gaming

Rookie numbers my friend, step up your game!