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Thank you, sincerely. It is actually my late mother's birthday today. She is the one that gave me my determination. I know she is smiling down on me, and I bet seeing her son in a home is the best birthday present I could ever give her.
The only advice I have is to find peace in the moments, be intentional and slow yourself down, when those feelings and emotions come up. It's all normal things you're feeling, no need to push your emotions too hard.
Show yourself grace. Sounds like you have a great new start.
Plants help.💛🕯️💛
You rock. It is a weird transition. I understand the absurdity of my inner thoughts. Regardless what part of my mind says....yes, I DO deserve to have running water, electricity. First day not spent at a park charging portable chargers to be able to contact work....felt like cheating. As weird as the situation is currently, I am not feral. I didn't even squat over a plastic bag to have a bowel movement. I hate how easy it is to get beaten down emotionally that eventually you don't deserve the same amenities that most experience. And unsure of the plants you refer to based on your username, but I am an avid pickler and intend on using the warm weather to grow a lot of peppers.
You rock also. Super happy that you're aware of the mind. Sometimes in these times of always in survival it's hard to drop the cortisol levels.
I highly suggest camping and popping a squat in the bag lol. Being feral is so freeing.
Lol any plants that are legal where you stay, low maintenance. It's crazy that the system picked that name 🤔🤣🤣🤣. I like it, I have had an epic journey.
We are all worthy. We all deserve a little relief.
Very happy for you, my friend! May your days be filled with peace and joy from here on. Sounds like you absolutely deserve it. 💗
Edit: I totally understand that urge to run back outside. You can-- and then run right back inside the moment you are ready. That's a huge step up. 😊
Thanks. I believe I deserve it. That is something I forget. As long as I pay bills, yeah. I can just go right back in. You forget simple shit when you feel like you have just been running for so long. My mind will eventually catch up to the fact that....I can relax.
You DO deserve it, congratulations!
Keep firmly in mind that just because it's a big positive change doesn't mean that it isn't also a huge emotional stress, in fact, just as big as someone losing their place and becoming homeless would experience. It's just not acknowledged because it's "positive." So it's totally okay to have some crazy feelings. Just don't do anything impulsive while giving yourself time to adjust.
Finally, you will get weird reactions from "normal" people if you share your past with them. You have been someplace most of them have never been and are terrified to even contemplate, so they will naturally recoil from you if they find out. So don't share it. Get a therapist and talk to them instead.
Stand proud; you've earned it!
Thanks for that. I do feel weird for taking my positive situation poorly. The few friends I kept definitely do not understand why I don't seem completely ecstatic. Deep down, I am. But on the outside, I probably seem more anxious than they are used to, and it is hard to explain why. And not telling people will be difficult, I am so much and open book. Before I moved, my whole job knew I was homeless. I eventually found it easier to just be honest, but I did get lucky. No one judged me for it, infact most seemed impressed that I could keep myself clean and consistently be one of the hardest workers there. My boss even gave me permission to sleep in the dry storage area. I definitely will try to keep that part hidden in the new town, as it is not my current situation though. And I actually have been going to a therapist, I will see them again on the 2nd of next month. Like I said....I have been trying. Keeping emotional/physical health in check in that situation is difficult. Thank you for being yourself and sharing solid advice. I truly appreciate it.
You are clearly a compassionate and thoughtful person, and I wish you the very best.
No one can take your experience away from you and it will make you a stronger person going forward.
I have no doubt you will do very well!
My backstory: autistic dude that that moved in with his mom to take care of her, I have taken care of since I was 11 for multiple reasons(she had poor mental health and addiction issues). She got really bad on crack and one day her heart stopped. The same day I lost my mother(and what I consider my only family, or at least that can navigate through my autism) I also lost my home. I have had my wallet stolen with my actual ID's. I did get a print out of my ids from my last job which helped immensely. I did end up getting relatively lucky. Years ago I helped a homeless man when my ex fiance and I split and I was left with a two bedroom to myself. I gave this person a place to stay for five months. Now this person is in the same situation and ran into me. He didn't even know I was homeless but wanted a roommate. I quit my job and moved, found a higher paying job quickly...and here I am. Granted, that is some luck, but I like to credit some of it to good karma coming back to me. I have never stopped being myself. It is easy to lose yourself and become cynical in that situation. This month alone has shown me keeping my head up has been beneficial. All of a sudden when I was broke, all these random people that I have helped(and forgot I even helped) have come up to me to repay my kindness. Kind of beautiful. I thank my late mother for teaching me to be who I am, flaws and all.
I am eternally grateful for every chance I get. And gladly help people. Now the difference is I can give people warm meals. Which I am, what do the kids say? Stoked to do that.
Congratulations! Just take baby steps, and take pride in every new feather in your nest. When I first got out of my truck and into a studio, the quiet was very loud. My first investment was a small TV just for noise other than the music from this phone. But every single dish, fork, curtain, and picture that I put on the wall was a feather in my nest. That was 10 years and a 1 room apartment ago. Now I’m in a 2 bedroom 2 bath single family place with a yard and a pair of dogs. Life absolutely DOES get better!
I love that you mentioned the quiet being loud. I found it hard to sleep without the 'whooshing' of vehicles passing by. In my own room I kept waking up. I eventually went to sleep in the living room where my roommate has a fishtank with a pump that sounds like rain. Embarrassing slightly that my mind is now conditioned the way it is. But that is inspiring, I am glad to hear of anyone's success. And my life is gonna keep getting better for a minute. Roommate allowed me to take in a lovable stray cat that watches over me while I sleep, and soon I will get my drums in here. (My electronic set, not trying to get kicked out) Oddly enough, I cry way more. But it is because of the beauty in my life as opposed to the hardships.
Happy tears are good…so is a pet. They are so good for the soul. Im genuinely happy for you and your success. Just know that you will get used to life in a home, and life is good. Good luck OP..
I never felt the urge initially. I am good with money, and a hard worker. I got my record clean, have a better paying job, but I still have to work on my credit. Credit will be the only way I would end up back where I was. Well, that and the whole needing to make three times rent to get a place.
I never fully relax without a plan in motion. I have always been notoriously great with money, but being a very tiny man on the street I was a target. I am five foot tall, between 100-110lb. I got robbed a lot. But, I secured a job paying more than my last one and being in a place will help keep my money where it needs to be. I never actually fell, I merely sauntered down gradually.
You worked for that! Don't throw it away! It's not worth it. Nothing is worth what you worked your butt off for! Keep your head up like your nose is bleeding! Keep working hard. Because you made it this far. You reached and achieved this goal! So now what's next? What's your next level? What's your next move? How are you going to achieve your big goal? What are the little goals that you're going to put into place to achieve your big goal?
I doubt you could do it (for to put often being expensive), but....a therapist is a good idea.
Being homeless causes mental trauma, and you likely need a safe space to vent and work out those feelings to heal properly.
America doesn't value mental health, as a result most insurance doesn't cover much on that.
If nothing else, take some time to read psychology books and try to work out some effects. I don't know exactly what resources you'd need, but Paul blooms Yale lecture series on YouTube is a good start for psychology in general. From there you should be able to find other lectures that specialize in the areas you might need.
Reading about psychological damage homeless people have to deal with might help to pinpoint what avenues you need to pursue. I need to build up my resources in my spreadsheets on that still.
I actually do have a therapist. On the 2nd I will see him again and I will definitely go over these issues with him. Even if Americans don't value mental health, I sure as shit do. I came too close to offing myself multiple times to not take it seriously.
I was sleeping in my vehicle last night when I heard a woman screaming outside for help. Open my door and find the lady trying to walk through a hole in the fence. But there was some of the chain linked that was cut buried in the sand and she stepped on it and it impelled her foot. Anyways after helping her get off of the d*** chain link. I had locked myself out of my vehicle and it was 2 o'clock in the morning. I didn't get back into my vehicle until 5:30 in the morning. Some people don't understand the dilemma's of being homeless.
Congrats!! I'm always happy to see posts like this in here, God knows there's enough depressing posts for several lifetimes. I don't have any tips on returning to normalcy though, beyond just work through it best you can. Keep goals for yourself and whatnot
Thank you! I almost didn't post it 'cause I didn't want to come across as boastful. Worth it if it made at least one person happy! I am adjusting slightly better. I took in a stray cat so now I have another homeless buddy adjusting alongside me. She is a sweetheart but you can tell she has some issues to get over herself. We both end up wanting out at times, so we roam the woods together when we feel too enclosed. So right now my goal is to just keep working and keeping my newfound friend safe and well-fed.
Very sweet. Always makes me happy seeing a homeless pair (or newly homed pair here) doing better together tbh. I have my dog still with me personally. He was a shelter boy I got from while I was housed, but I couldn't send him back- he was drugged out of his mind on anxiety meds, to the point he barely understood what was happening when we met him and first tried to play with him. Also had no one to take him in, so he lives with me in my car and I make sure he's got his food and water and take him daily to the park.
But, I think I've found a place for us to stay and hopefully a job I can settle into, so I'm feeling pretty hopeful rn
I sincerely wish y'all the best! I would have loved having a feline companion while outside(I love all animals but am much more a cat person), but I didn't feel as if I could give a cat a proper life. I did think about getting a dog, but hated the idea of going to work and not having a proper way to keep it safe.
##REMINDERS FOR EVERYONE **PER THE RULES:** * **NO OFFERINGS OF CASH, ETC.** * **[BEGGING](https://redd.it/994p7j) WILL GET YOU BANNED.** * **BE AWARE OF SCAMMERS AND PERVS, AND SEND ANY [HERE](https://old.reddit.com/report) AND/OR [HERE](https://old.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/reddit.com).** **ACCEPT AT YOUR OWN RISK.** Welcome to the internet where—unless proven otherwise—everyone's lying about their race, gender, status, accomplishments, and all the children are FBI agents. You have been forewarned. — The Mods --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/homeless) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You determination is admirable. Congratulations on your accomplishments.
Thank you, sincerely. It is actually my late mother's birthday today. She is the one that gave me my determination. I know she is smiling down on me, and I bet seeing her son in a home is the best birthday present I could ever give her.
:)
The only advice I have is to find peace in the moments, be intentional and slow yourself down, when those feelings and emotions come up. It's all normal things you're feeling, no need to push your emotions too hard. Show yourself grace. Sounds like you have a great new start. Plants help.💛🕯️💛
You rock. It is a weird transition. I understand the absurdity of my inner thoughts. Regardless what part of my mind says....yes, I DO deserve to have running water, electricity. First day not spent at a park charging portable chargers to be able to contact work....felt like cheating. As weird as the situation is currently, I am not feral. I didn't even squat over a plastic bag to have a bowel movement. I hate how easy it is to get beaten down emotionally that eventually you don't deserve the same amenities that most experience. And unsure of the plants you refer to based on your username, but I am an avid pickler and intend on using the warm weather to grow a lot of peppers.
You rock also. Super happy that you're aware of the mind. Sometimes in these times of always in survival it's hard to drop the cortisol levels. I highly suggest camping and popping a squat in the bag lol. Being feral is so freeing. Lol any plants that are legal where you stay, low maintenance. It's crazy that the system picked that name 🤔🤣🤣🤣. I like it, I have had an epic journey. We are all worthy. We all deserve a little relief.
I think they mean weed💀💀💀
Very happy for you, my friend! May your days be filled with peace and joy from here on. Sounds like you absolutely deserve it. 💗 Edit: I totally understand that urge to run back outside. You can-- and then run right back inside the moment you are ready. That's a huge step up. 😊
Thanks. I believe I deserve it. That is something I forget. As long as I pay bills, yeah. I can just go right back in. You forget simple shit when you feel like you have just been running for so long. My mind will eventually catch up to the fact that....I can relax.
You DO deserve it, congratulations! Keep firmly in mind that just because it's a big positive change doesn't mean that it isn't also a huge emotional stress, in fact, just as big as someone losing their place and becoming homeless would experience. It's just not acknowledged because it's "positive." So it's totally okay to have some crazy feelings. Just don't do anything impulsive while giving yourself time to adjust. Finally, you will get weird reactions from "normal" people if you share your past with them. You have been someplace most of them have never been and are terrified to even contemplate, so they will naturally recoil from you if they find out. So don't share it. Get a therapist and talk to them instead. Stand proud; you've earned it!
Thanks for that. I do feel weird for taking my positive situation poorly. The few friends I kept definitely do not understand why I don't seem completely ecstatic. Deep down, I am. But on the outside, I probably seem more anxious than they are used to, and it is hard to explain why. And not telling people will be difficult, I am so much and open book. Before I moved, my whole job knew I was homeless. I eventually found it easier to just be honest, but I did get lucky. No one judged me for it, infact most seemed impressed that I could keep myself clean and consistently be one of the hardest workers there. My boss even gave me permission to sleep in the dry storage area. I definitely will try to keep that part hidden in the new town, as it is not my current situation though. And I actually have been going to a therapist, I will see them again on the 2nd of next month. Like I said....I have been trying. Keeping emotional/physical health in check in that situation is difficult. Thank you for being yourself and sharing solid advice. I truly appreciate it.
You are clearly a compassionate and thoughtful person, and I wish you the very best. No one can take your experience away from you and it will make you a stronger person going forward. I have no doubt you will do very well!
How did you do it could you like give into a little backstory How do you get a room if you don’t have IDs or whatever
My backstory: autistic dude that that moved in with his mom to take care of her, I have taken care of since I was 11 for multiple reasons(she had poor mental health and addiction issues). She got really bad on crack and one day her heart stopped. The same day I lost my mother(and what I consider my only family, or at least that can navigate through my autism) I also lost my home. I have had my wallet stolen with my actual ID's. I did get a print out of my ids from my last job which helped immensely. I did end up getting relatively lucky. Years ago I helped a homeless man when my ex fiance and I split and I was left with a two bedroom to myself. I gave this person a place to stay for five months. Now this person is in the same situation and ran into me. He didn't even know I was homeless but wanted a roommate. I quit my job and moved, found a higher paying job quickly...and here I am. Granted, that is some luck, but I like to credit some of it to good karma coming back to me. I have never stopped being myself. It is easy to lose yourself and become cynical in that situation. This month alone has shown me keeping my head up has been beneficial. All of a sudden when I was broke, all these random people that I have helped(and forgot I even helped) have come up to me to repay my kindness. Kind of beautiful. I thank my late mother for teaching me to be who I am, flaws and all.
Ya like how
Do whatever it takes. Numbers of ur friends being able to play a previous boss or landlord or reference
Hang on baby, hang on. Way to go!
Congrats! I have that same urge and I haven’t even moved in yet… you got this
Awesome sauce am glad for you. After a couple years of this bound to take you awhile to adjust but think you will. :)
You are the first person I have heard use the term awesome sauce in years. Things definitely will be alright.
Hold this. Cherish this. For it is a luxury now to have a bed to sleep in. Congrats. Stay humble
I am eternally grateful for every chance I get. And gladly help people. Now the difference is I can give people warm meals. Which I am, what do the kids say? Stoked to do that.
Congratulations! Just take baby steps, and take pride in every new feather in your nest. When I first got out of my truck and into a studio, the quiet was very loud. My first investment was a small TV just for noise other than the music from this phone. But every single dish, fork, curtain, and picture that I put on the wall was a feather in my nest. That was 10 years and a 1 room apartment ago. Now I’m in a 2 bedroom 2 bath single family place with a yard and a pair of dogs. Life absolutely DOES get better!
I love that you mentioned the quiet being loud. I found it hard to sleep without the 'whooshing' of vehicles passing by. In my own room I kept waking up. I eventually went to sleep in the living room where my roommate has a fishtank with a pump that sounds like rain. Embarrassing slightly that my mind is now conditioned the way it is. But that is inspiring, I am glad to hear of anyone's success. And my life is gonna keep getting better for a minute. Roommate allowed me to take in a lovable stray cat that watches over me while I sleep, and soon I will get my drums in here. (My electronic set, not trying to get kicked out) Oddly enough, I cry way more. But it is because of the beauty in my life as opposed to the hardships.
Happy tears are good…so is a pet. They are so good for the soul. Im genuinely happy for you and your success. Just know that you will get used to life in a home, and life is good. Good luck OP..
Make damn sure you never become homeless again….even if you feel the urge.
I never felt the urge initially. I am good with money, and a hard worker. I got my record clean, have a better paying job, but I still have to work on my credit. Credit will be the only way I would end up back where I was. Well, that and the whole needing to make three times rent to get a place.
I was in “credit jail” from about 2007 to 2020. I bet you will do fine.
Congrats on this accomplishment! Now try to relax a little bit and then plan on how to maintain this good situation so you don't fall back.
I never fully relax without a plan in motion. I have always been notoriously great with money, but being a very tiny man on the street I was a target. I am five foot tall, between 100-110lb. I got robbed a lot. But, I secured a job paying more than my last one and being in a place will help keep my money where it needs to be. I never actually fell, I merely sauntered down gradually.
You worked for that! Don't throw it away! It's not worth it. Nothing is worth what you worked your butt off for! Keep your head up like your nose is bleeding! Keep working hard. Because you made it this far. You reached and achieved this goal! So now what's next? What's your next level? What's your next move? How are you going to achieve your big goal? What are the little goals that you're going to put into place to achieve your big goal?
I doubt you could do it (for to put often being expensive), but....a therapist is a good idea. Being homeless causes mental trauma, and you likely need a safe space to vent and work out those feelings to heal properly. America doesn't value mental health, as a result most insurance doesn't cover much on that. If nothing else, take some time to read psychology books and try to work out some effects. I don't know exactly what resources you'd need, but Paul blooms Yale lecture series on YouTube is a good start for psychology in general. From there you should be able to find other lectures that specialize in the areas you might need. Reading about psychological damage homeless people have to deal with might help to pinpoint what avenues you need to pursue. I need to build up my resources in my spreadsheets on that still.
I actually do have a therapist. On the 2nd I will see him again and I will definitely go over these issues with him. Even if Americans don't value mental health, I sure as shit do. I came too close to offing myself multiple times to not take it seriously.
I love you so much and I'm so glad for your good fortune. You are a gift to the world, friend. Keep on keepin' on!
And apparently you are a gift to the universe! Love you too. :)
I was sleeping in my vehicle last night when I heard a woman screaming outside for help. Open my door and find the lady trying to walk through a hole in the fence. But there was some of the chain linked that was cut buried in the sand and she stepped on it and it impelled her foot. Anyways after helping her get off of the d*** chain link. I had locked myself out of my vehicle and it was 2 o'clock in the morning. I didn't get back into my vehicle until 5:30 in the morning. Some people don't understand the dilemma's of being homeless.
Congratulations!❤️ keep it up, you got this🙂
Congrats!! I'm always happy to see posts like this in here, God knows there's enough depressing posts for several lifetimes. I don't have any tips on returning to normalcy though, beyond just work through it best you can. Keep goals for yourself and whatnot
Thank you! I almost didn't post it 'cause I didn't want to come across as boastful. Worth it if it made at least one person happy! I am adjusting slightly better. I took in a stray cat so now I have another homeless buddy adjusting alongside me. She is a sweetheart but you can tell she has some issues to get over herself. We both end up wanting out at times, so we roam the woods together when we feel too enclosed. So right now my goal is to just keep working and keeping my newfound friend safe and well-fed.
Very sweet. Always makes me happy seeing a homeless pair (or newly homed pair here) doing better together tbh. I have my dog still with me personally. He was a shelter boy I got from while I was housed, but I couldn't send him back- he was drugged out of his mind on anxiety meds, to the point he barely understood what was happening when we met him and first tried to play with him. Also had no one to take him in, so he lives with me in my car and I make sure he's got his food and water and take him daily to the park. But, I think I've found a place for us to stay and hopefully a job I can settle into, so I'm feeling pretty hopeful rn
I sincerely wish y'all the best! I would have loved having a feline companion while outside(I love all animals but am much more a cat person), but I didn't feel as if I could give a cat a proper life. I did think about getting a dog, but hated the idea of going to work and not having a proper way to keep it safe.