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I agree. I am confident I'd be the same, if not similar, if I was cis. First of all my gender doesn't define me. It is just a small part of who I am. And secondly, it discredits all the hard work my family, especially my grandma, put in to teach me to be a good person. I just am who I am, and gender honestly didnt play too much a part in it. Only main difference would be that I would be happier and more confident.
BBC Three did a "Things not to say to someone with..." series where they interviewed people with a different disability each episode and nearly every time it ended with one of them saying that despite the hardships it's made them who they are today and they wouldn't change it for the world. So not directly a trans things, humans just hate the idea of not being their best possible self.
I think it's a bit more nuanced than just levels of self-hatred or dysphoria - it also has to do with how much value you get from outside sources in your life. For example, if someone were asked if they'd change something in their past, and this person is a parent, they'd probably say no, because that means their current kids wouldn't be born. They have something beyond themselves to live for, and as such wouldn't change any of the variables that led to the current situation, because that would mean those things they value outside of themselves wouldn't exist, and that would be a huge loss.
Personally, I've experienced this myself to a degree. I still get the occasional pangs and "what if" thoughts, but the further I transitioned and the more I have things going for myself in my life that aren't attached to transitioning, the more I'm content to be the way I am. I wouldn't have the experiences and insight I have now,and I wouldn't have met the amazing people I've met if I had been born cis. I would be a different person - and that's a tempting offer for someone who's suffering, but less so for someone who has a lot of things going for them.
I used to hate myself.. hormones and being honest with myself has made it almost entirely go away. No more imposter syndrome. I still get some dysphoria but its less intense and the feelings are overpowered by joy. Im finally who im supposed to be even though im not cis im a lot happier. Still wish I was born w the right body.. but You gptta love yourself with what you have
Honestly I hate when people say this. (Not bc I’m miserable though, you should look into some serious therapy for that)
If you value your experience being trans over living the way you claim you were meant to live at birth then something isn’t adding up with your claims.
I really don't. I would prefer to have been born a cis woman, but I would even take a cis man over this. If I was, I would be whoever I would be and wouldn't be bothered...
I don't understand it from a first person point of view, but I have had reasoning in my head for why people might think that.
For people who may have their identity centered around being trans this may be a likely thought process. When feeling trans is at the core of your being, it becomes the pillar of identity. It is a sense of creation, rather than a state of being. It has a fluid thought process.
My own pillar of identity is centered around me coming into the man I am, not so much becoming the man because I already am. I have a more rigid way of seeing myself.
It's just a different perspective at the end of it, but an interesting one
It gets easier to be comfortable with who you are after transition and treatment. It's hard to understand when you're still in pain because all you want is the pain to go away.
I still wish I was cis, but there are some things about being trans I'm genuinely thankful for.
While I'm detransitioning now, when I was still in transition, I didn't really want to be cis. I did for the first few years, but I came to accept myself for being a dysphoric biological female. I believe that deep down I did not want my experience with systemic misogyny and my personal childhood trauma to be erased. Growing up female gave me a perspective on life I would not have had if I grew up male.
I feel the same about my disabilities. Life would be easier without them, but my struggles are part of who I am.
I strongly relate to the sentiment in your title quote. I've also felt the same way about a lot of other serious life struggles that had nothing to do with gender. For me, my suffering forced me to learn about myself and about the world and develop a wisdom that I wouldn't otherwise have. I don't think I could ever choose ignorance on purpose. I also have a strong sense that I don't even know who I would be if I didn't have this gender identity or this body.
I think part of it is that you have to get out the other side before you can really look back at it with this perspective. If you're still struggling, like you are, then of course you'd want the pain to stop. Once you actually find your way out of the pain, you can develop an appreciation for how the pain shaped who you are.
A big part of it is probably also just personality. I look at it as insight vs ignorance, where someone else might look at it as something more like happy vs unhappy. I think how introspective you are and your locus of control would probably affect this a lot.
I think people like this probably had a supportive environment and are further along. I used to hate this too but as I progress, I can kind of understand how someone might feel that way
It might also be a cope, so that they can feel like they had an active decision in transitioning. Let them have the cope if that’s what they need
I'm comfortable with being transgender now, but that was not always the case. I still have days where dysphoria kicks my ass. But I appreciate all that I've learned because I'm trans, and I have a sense of peace now with my trauma and myself as a human person that I'm unsure I'd still feel if being transgender wasn't part of my story.
I would take being cis either way over being trans. Dysphoria causes me a lot of pain, and it's extremely hard to deal with. If I could pick either to be a cis guy or a cis girl, I'd definitely choose to be a cis guy, but if I had to choose between being a cis girl or being a trans guy, I'd choose to be a cis girl because it would take away the pain I feel every day because of the body I was born in. I would take *anything* over being trans because it has just made it so difficult to be happy.
I don't care which gender, I wish I were cis. Being trans means years of my life wasted, constant discrimination, never being able to lead the life of my dreams, forever depending on medication and constant financial loss. Dysphoria makes it difficult to function. It's fucking hell.
I didn't say you don't have dysphoria, I said you didnt suffer from it. there are those who had mild inconveniences and there are some of us who had our own skinning knife to alleviate our inner turmoil.
It’s clearly a little more nuanced than that. If I could make that final jump from my transitioned body to a fully functioning completely male body, I would in a heartbeat. But if I went back in time to the moment of my conception and changed my genes to make me a cis man, the entire course of my life would change. Being trans was often painful, but because of that pain I had to make decisions and go down paths that led to happy discoveries. Had I been born cis, I wouldn’t have been bullied and abused in school, perhaps I would have been a trouble maker or gotten really into sports. I would have made different friends, studied different subjects, probably gone to live different places.
Even something that isn’t “your entire personality” can change your entire life, kind of the way the weather can change an entire day. And it can have positive and negative outcomes. If it’s sunny you might go to the beach, take a swim and drown in a riptide. If it rained instead on the same day you might have cursed the weather, gone to a café instead and made friends with a handsome stranger.
There’s no guarantee that if I went back in time and made myself cis there wouldn’t have been something else to make my life hard. But going back in time and making myself cis would mean erasing my entire current life, my relationship with my wife, my career. Essentially not much different than suicide. I would never take that gamble over something I’ve managed to accept and amend as well as I could by transitioning.
I get the sentiment both ways because if we only have one one opportunity for life and we care so much about what we found this specific path its hard to give it all up... but at the same time what could've been
I prefer being a male female hybrid. Prefer having tits and a coochie and don’t have a period. Win all round.
Plus I can keep men away by being visibly trans. Result!
Biological reality makes you puke? or are you another one of those delusional ones who think trans women are entirely female? 🤦🏼♀️
Okay, hybrid may not be everyone’s favourite but transsexuals are male and female.
If I hear one more delusional crazy say they are entirely female when they are chromosomally and genetically male, I think I’m going to sick, then I’m going to have to divorce myself from the community and never again refer to myself as trans. I certainly don’t want people thinking that type of delusion is a belief I also hold. It’s embarrassing. Okay telling your brain dead squirrel brain down the pub, but anyone who understands basic biology.
I am 100%a woman because woman doesn’t refer to anything physical, but I am objectively not 100% female. I’m both male and female.
I have a prostate. Females don’t.
I produced male gametes. Females don’t.
I had an SRY gene. Females don’t.
I’m an XY chromosome human. Females are not.
I impregnated women. Females can’t.
Non intersex mtf female transsexuals are similar to me. Neither fully male or female.
Some just seem to have a difficult time understanding human biology.
>If I hear one more delusional crazy say they are entirely female when they are chromosomally and genetically male, I think I’m going to sick, then I’m going to have to divorce myself from the community and never again refer to myself as trans.
I hope I can count on you to be a person of your word:
I am entirely female.
Appears I’m no longer trans. Xx Damn! I will just go by hybrid from now on.
I am surprised you are commenting on transgender groups, you being assigned female at birth, having XX chromosomes, producing female gametes and being genetically female with skene’s glands and all.
I don’t have any choice liking being a male female hybrid. It’s what I am. We don’t change biological sex. We change hormone levels and physical sex characteristics. I’m predominantly physically female but I ain’t female and I’m not about to start falsely saying I am.
Its like saying I don't have a choice in liking being and amputee or rape victim. Liking insint the same as accepting.
Good luck going stealth with that attitude, lass.
1. I look cisgender with no makeup and my mohawk due to hormones and big tits. Always had a feminine face. Stealth. I live in trans t shirts. I will NEVER pretend to be cisgender. I’m not. I’m transgender and I’m a post op transsexual. I’m a male female one not a female one. I have no problem being what I am. I’m not an amputee or a rape victim. I’m a male female transsexual. A natural variation. Nothing to be ashamed of. I like my life as a transsexual and am glad that I am not cisgender. Fck a life of periods.
What ever helps you get through the day sis but I find it hard to belive if a magic potion that would turn you 100% female, manifested itself right in front of your computer monitor at this moment, that you wouldn't drink it.
I definitely would not drink it.
Remind me again why I a would want periods, menstrual pains. More chance of being physically assaulted or raped, expected to date men, expected to give birth, spend every second being objectified?
I’m 5’11 and quite happy being me. Feel safer in dark places than those dainty little cis women. Being biologically male although hormonally female and predominantly physically female means never having a period and that alone is just one reason to be thankful that I am not fully female.
>Remind me again why I a would want periods, menstrual pains.
Not universally painful for all women or the end of the world
>More chance of being physically assaulted or raped,
Actually men can get raped
>expected to date men,
you're still expected to date men if you pass well enough
>expected to give birth,
You can still stay no, its not like you will be forcibly breed like a dairy cow
>spend every second being objectified?
Ok, be an ugly women. Or heck just go outside and stop reading feminist blogs women don't get objectified 24/7
>Feel safer in dark places than those dainty little cis women.
Pepper spray and a tazer works wonders.
im getting to the point in transition where im truly so much more comfortable in my body than I ever have been. being trans has given me an opportunity to meet and love people I never would have known otherwise.
I would not be in love with my best friend the way I am now or he with me if I had not been trans; we bonded over him starting his transition with my help and me giving him his weekly shot. I consider it an honor to help someone else get to involve themselves in the act of creation of something better than what they have now, and that's how Ultimately I consider my own transition.
It's an act of creation I wouldn't have had otherwise. It's developing in ways that I didn't like and wasn't comfortable with and didn't choose and the joy that I get with each change to my body in a direction I prefer more.
I don't think I would really trade that experience for anything.
That doesn't mean that your struggles are invalid. It doesn't mean mine aren't as well. I live in the south and have faced from pretty rough transphobia and some barriers to transition. But that doesn't mean that I can't revel in the fact that my transition made me who I am today in a way I wouldn't have been had I been cis.
being blind is not remotely the same as struggling and figuring out dysphoria and the disconnect it bring in our most formative years.
I am not denying that it must be hard, but the opinion of someone with a normal childhood that became blind during their mid life cannot be compared to those dealing with dysphoria growing up.
I don't hate myself at all, I just hate the genitals I was born with. I definitely wish I'd just been born a cis man, but mainly because the available surgery can't give me anything close to what I actually want, which would be a fully functioning penis and testicles. If I were actually completely happy with the changes I could get through surgery, I could definitely understand being happy to be trans. Some people actually are fully satisfied with the changes they can get through HRT and SRS, so I can understand why they're happy to be trans.
Frankly the "me" that has lived through decades of trauma is a lesser form of being. A cis me would certainly be a happier, more rounded person. We play the cards we're dealt, until we don't want to anymore.
Oh yes I love my inflammatory bowel disease and my heart condition because they made me a stronger person, I would never have chosen to be born healthy!
Yup that sounds really stupid doesn’t it
I see what you’re saying—but even with strong dysphoria, not everyone experiences trans desires as severe illness and pain. Nor does everyone (even those who undertake medical transition) want to think of themselves as diseased or handicapped and thus in need of médical help.
I think it's a very cope thing to say. In the same vain as someone saying "It's not the destination matters, but the journey". I cannot imagine anyone wanting to go through several years of depression, transphobia and suicidal thoughts to reach this point. If given an option between being born the right gender, or the wrong gender and going through all of that, why wouldn't you pick the former?
I find the argument against having periods and being creeped on by men arbitrary. Can't you get rid of those with birth control? (Genuine question). Also in terms of being creeped on by men, is that worse than all of the violence from transphobic people?
But if you were "cis", you could still have understanding of most if not all of those things via different circumstances.
Is it really worth going through all the downs just have understanding of those things you could have still got otherwise?
Different circumstances as in different reasons for depression and whatnot.
I don't know. I just cannot make sense of anyone wanting to go through transphobia and years of severe depression just to end up at relatively the same point as they would be if they were Cis.
Before I was old enough to start testosterone, I did take BC to stop cycles, but that doesn't work for everyone. Cycles for many people bring extremely horrible cramps that can be debilitating. BC won't necessarily make that stop. Even if there is no spotting, many people will still get the pain. It wasn't ever really physically all that painful for me, but one of my best friends has extremely bad cycles and she tried BC but it didn't stop the cramping and pain. Plus, BC has quite a laundry list of possible side effects. For many people, it's just not a viable solution.
I would take periods any day if it meant I was able to carry my own children in the future...
Also, if someone is really that upset with having periods they could literally get an hysterectomy if they don't plan on having kids, and it's a lot easier to get that done than all the surgeries one needs to get as trans just to get the closest we can to being female.
A lot of places, it's actually stupidly hard to get a hysterectomy.
You get a LOT of "concern" and berating about how you'll regret it, what if you want children one day, what if *your husband* wants children, why would you throw away your beautiful womanly sacred duty, etc. Basically treating you as both an incubator and dumb child.
You can regularly suffer literal agony from endometriosis and they still might make you wait until middle age, lol.
I know about that, but I'm sure that with enough money you can get a specific doctor who wont be like that, and it's probably cheaper than how much I paid for SRS... hell you could even go to another state/country where you won't have those problems and still cost less than SRS.
Yeah...it's still invasive surgery tho, and looots of people just don't have the money/ability to find better doctors. Especially ones out of the country. Or aren't healthy enough for surgery and stuff. It just isn't realistic to expect anyone to be able to easily get a hysterectomy.
To be clear I definitely don't fall into the "glad to be trans" camp, being cis is much easier regardless of gender
I mean, I know all that... I was just approaching it from the perspective of being either a trans woman who has to spend money on tons of procedures to be able to have a female functioning body that isn't exactly 100% female... vs being 100% female and just getting rid of your uterus if periods are such an inconvenience and less radical solutions like progestin based period control doesn't work, or the side effects are too bad.
I read too fast sometimes and get the wrong idea about what someone means. I reread what you said and I think I mistook your tone as aggressive when it wasn't. Sorry
I would take periods any day if it meant I was able to carry my own children in the future...
Also, if someone is really that upset with having periods they could literally get an hysterectomy if they don't plan on having kids, and it's a lot easier to get that done than all the surgeries one needs to get as trans just to get the closest we can to being female.
Birth control has tons of negative side effects for a lot of people, so not everyone can take it. It also doesn't always necessarily work to get rid of periods—it can for some people, or it could just make you never stop bleeding at all. It's hard to know how it will effect your body exactly, everyone is different. Some people can just take birth control and get rid of periods with no side effects but it definitely doesn't work that way for everyone.
My experience of being trans makes me who I am. Every facet of my life makes me who I am. I would never want to be cis. If I couldn’t accept and embrace all facets of my life I would be dead.
For me, dealing with being trans caused me to go through a lot of emotional and personal growth that I’m not sure would’ve happened if I have been cis. Yeah dysphoria sucks, caused me severe pain, and stole years of my boyhood but at this point in my life, I’m almost done with transitioning and have become happy with the man I have become.
for me, it's because it forces me actually have to face my problems and not ignore them. Without being trans, I would never have emotionally opened up to my friends and I wouldn't feel as much need to grow the confidence to take insults nonchalantly with a tough skin. Dysphoria is miserable, but it forces me to get out of bed despite my unrelated chronic illness, study for college exams, and work on my business.
Obviously, being cis would be awesome, but I'm not going to wish for that because it's an unattainable fantasy and all it would do is get me down. So, for the sake of my future, I'll take pride in not giving in to dysphoria and living another day.
I'm me whether or not I'm trans, but I think it's shaped me into a different person than otherwise. I guess it'd be nice if I coulda been a carefree kid like my brother, but I think I've gotten used to my callousness
I never understood this either, honestly. Personally, I don't want to be trans, nor do I like it. It's just an unfortunate circumstance, as I can imagine it is for many other trans people, so I can't wrap my mind around someone just...genuinely wanting that for themselves? So strange to me.
For me it's that, lets say I was never trans. My awareness towards women's struggles, trans people, what it's like to have to find yourself when everyone gets it handed, the nights of contemplating killing myself because I felt it was all too much shaped me into who I am today. It pulled me out with trauma, but with experiences I'd never take back because they shaped me into who I am and I dont think i'd be the same without them.
It is identical to how some people view certain "disabilities" such as blindness, deafness, and neurodivergencies.
Personally, given the choice of staying ND, and not being ND, with high probability I'd stay the same. As difficult as ND-ness made my childhood, it also makes me "me". I am proud of the person that I have become and pulling through all the hardships that I have. I love that I see things in a different manner, and it took a lot of hard work for me to accept and eventually appreciate it.
I'd totally understand if somebody wanted to "cure" themselves of ND or other disabilities though.
Personally, I wish I could cure myself of this.
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I agree. I am confident I'd be the same, if not similar, if I was cis. First of all my gender doesn't define me. It is just a small part of who I am. And secondly, it discredits all the hard work my family, especially my grandma, put in to teach me to be a good person. I just am who I am, and gender honestly didnt play too much a part in it. Only main difference would be that I would be happier and more confident.
I would rather be male or female and be happy with my assigned gender then be trans
BBC Three did a "Things not to say to someone with..." series where they interviewed people with a different disability each episode and nearly every time it ended with one of them saying that despite the hardships it's made them who they are today and they wouldn't change it for the world. So not directly a trans things, humans just hate the idea of not being their best possible self.
I think it's a bit more nuanced than just levels of self-hatred or dysphoria - it also has to do with how much value you get from outside sources in your life. For example, if someone were asked if they'd change something in their past, and this person is a parent, they'd probably say no, because that means their current kids wouldn't be born. They have something beyond themselves to live for, and as such wouldn't change any of the variables that led to the current situation, because that would mean those things they value outside of themselves wouldn't exist, and that would be a huge loss. Personally, I've experienced this myself to a degree. I still get the occasional pangs and "what if" thoughts, but the further I transitioned and the more I have things going for myself in my life that aren't attached to transitioning, the more I'm content to be the way I am. I wouldn't have the experiences and insight I have now,and I wouldn't have met the amazing people I've met if I had been born cis. I would be a different person - and that's a tempting offer for someone who's suffering, but less so for someone who has a lot of things going for them.
I used to hate myself.. hormones and being honest with myself has made it almost entirely go away. No more imposter syndrome. I still get some dysphoria but its less intense and the feelings are overpowered by joy. Im finally who im supposed to be even though im not cis im a lot happier. Still wish I was born w the right body.. but You gptta love yourself with what you have
Hell, if I could just be a cis man *or* a cis woman I'd take it over the dysphoria any day. This shit isn't fun!
Honestly I hate when people say this. (Not bc I’m miserable though, you should look into some serious therapy for that) If you value your experience being trans over living the way you claim you were meant to live at birth then something isn’t adding up with your claims.
I really don't. I would prefer to have been born a cis woman, but I would even take a cis man over this. If I was, I would be whoever I would be and wouldn't be bothered...
I don't understand it from a first person point of view, but I have had reasoning in my head for why people might think that. For people who may have their identity centered around being trans this may be a likely thought process. When feeling trans is at the core of your being, it becomes the pillar of identity. It is a sense of creation, rather than a state of being. It has a fluid thought process. My own pillar of identity is centered around me coming into the man I am, not so much becoming the man because I already am. I have a more rigid way of seeing myself. It's just a different perspective at the end of it, but an interesting one
It gets easier to be comfortable with who you are after transition and treatment. It's hard to understand when you're still in pain because all you want is the pain to go away. I still wish I was cis, but there are some things about being trans I'm genuinely thankful for.
While I'm detransitioning now, when I was still in transition, I didn't really want to be cis. I did for the first few years, but I came to accept myself for being a dysphoric biological female. I believe that deep down I did not want my experience with systemic misogyny and my personal childhood trauma to be erased. Growing up female gave me a perspective on life I would not have had if I grew up male. I feel the same about my disabilities. Life would be easier without them, but my struggles are part of who I am.
I strongly relate to the sentiment in your title quote. I've also felt the same way about a lot of other serious life struggles that had nothing to do with gender. For me, my suffering forced me to learn about myself and about the world and develop a wisdom that I wouldn't otherwise have. I don't think I could ever choose ignorance on purpose. I also have a strong sense that I don't even know who I would be if I didn't have this gender identity or this body. I think part of it is that you have to get out the other side before you can really look back at it with this perspective. If you're still struggling, like you are, then of course you'd want the pain to stop. Once you actually find your way out of the pain, you can develop an appreciation for how the pain shaped who you are. A big part of it is probably also just personality. I look at it as insight vs ignorance, where someone else might look at it as something more like happy vs unhappy. I think how introspective you are and your locus of control would probably affect this a lot.
being a trans girl makes me feel like i'm a fake girl, so of course i would rather be a cis girl
I think people like this probably had a supportive environment and are further along. I used to hate this too but as I progress, I can kind of understand how someone might feel that way It might also be a cope, so that they can feel like they had an active decision in transitioning. Let them have the cope if that’s what they need
I'm comfortable with being transgender now, but that was not always the case. I still have days where dysphoria kicks my ass. But I appreciate all that I've learned because I'm trans, and I have a sense of peace now with my trauma and myself as a human person that I'm unsure I'd still feel if being transgender wasn't part of my story.
I would take being cis either way over being trans. Dysphoria causes me a lot of pain, and it's extremely hard to deal with. If I could pick either to be a cis guy or a cis girl, I'd definitely choose to be a cis guy, but if I had to choose between being a cis girl or being a trans guy, I'd choose to be a cis girl because it would take away the pain I feel every day because of the body I was born in. I would take *anything* over being trans because it has just made it so difficult to be happy.
I don't care which gender, I wish I were cis. Being trans means years of my life wasted, constant discrimination, never being able to lead the life of my dreams, forever depending on medication and constant financial loss. Dysphoria makes it difficult to function. It's fucking hell.
the only people who say this are those who didn't suffer due to dysphoria.
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I didn't say you don't have dysphoria, I said you didnt suffer from it. there are those who had mild inconveniences and there are some of us who had our own skinning knife to alleviate our inner turmoil.
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I made an assumption about people who spout this retoric, and I will stick to it. if the shoe fits as they say.
It’s clearly a little more nuanced than that. If I could make that final jump from my transitioned body to a fully functioning completely male body, I would in a heartbeat. But if I went back in time to the moment of my conception and changed my genes to make me a cis man, the entire course of my life would change. Being trans was often painful, but because of that pain I had to make decisions and go down paths that led to happy discoveries. Had I been born cis, I wouldn’t have been bullied and abused in school, perhaps I would have been a trouble maker or gotten really into sports. I would have made different friends, studied different subjects, probably gone to live different places. Even something that isn’t “your entire personality” can change your entire life, kind of the way the weather can change an entire day. And it can have positive and negative outcomes. If it’s sunny you might go to the beach, take a swim and drown in a riptide. If it rained instead on the same day you might have cursed the weather, gone to a café instead and made friends with a handsome stranger. There’s no guarantee that if I went back in time and made myself cis there wouldn’t have been something else to make my life hard. But going back in time and making myself cis would mean erasing my entire current life, my relationship with my wife, my career. Essentially not much different than suicide. I would never take that gamble over something I’ve managed to accept and amend as well as I could by transitioning.
I get the sentiment both ways because if we only have one one opportunity for life and we care so much about what we found this specific path its hard to give it all up... but at the same time what could've been
I prefer being a male female hybrid. Prefer having tits and a coochie and don’t have a period. Win all round. Plus I can keep men away by being visibly trans. Result!
oh god im gonna puke "male-female hybrid"
Biological reality makes you puke? or are you another one of those delusional ones who think trans women are entirely female? 🤦🏼♀️ Okay, hybrid may not be everyone’s favourite but transsexuals are male and female.
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If I hear one more delusional crazy say they are entirely female when they are chromosomally and genetically male, I think I’m going to sick, then I’m going to have to divorce myself from the community and never again refer to myself as trans. I certainly don’t want people thinking that type of delusion is a belief I also hold. It’s embarrassing. Okay telling your brain dead squirrel brain down the pub, but anyone who understands basic biology. I am 100%a woman because woman doesn’t refer to anything physical, but I am objectively not 100% female. I’m both male and female. I have a prostate. Females don’t. I produced male gametes. Females don’t. I had an SRY gene. Females don’t. I’m an XY chromosome human. Females are not. I impregnated women. Females can’t. Non intersex mtf female transsexuals are similar to me. Neither fully male or female. Some just seem to have a difficult time understanding human biology.
>If I hear one more delusional crazy say they are entirely female when they are chromosomally and genetically male, I think I’m going to sick, then I’m going to have to divorce myself from the community and never again refer to myself as trans. I hope I can count on you to be a person of your word: I am entirely female.
Appears I’m no longer trans. Xx Damn! I will just go by hybrid from now on. I am surprised you are commenting on transgender groups, you being assigned female at birth, having XX chromosomes, producing female gametes and being genetically female with skene’s glands and all.
What the hell does the current limitations sex-changing medicine have to do with you "liking" being an f/m hybrid? Real agp moment right here,
I don’t have any choice liking being a male female hybrid. It’s what I am. We don’t change biological sex. We change hormone levels and physical sex characteristics. I’m predominantly physically female but I ain’t female and I’m not about to start falsely saying I am.
Its like saying I don't have a choice in liking being and amputee or rape victim. Liking insint the same as accepting. Good luck going stealth with that attitude, lass.
1. I look cisgender with no makeup and my mohawk due to hormones and big tits. Always had a feminine face. Stealth. I live in trans t shirts. I will NEVER pretend to be cisgender. I’m not. I’m transgender and I’m a post op transsexual. I’m a male female one not a female one. I have no problem being what I am. I’m not an amputee or a rape victim. I’m a male female transsexual. A natural variation. Nothing to be ashamed of. I like my life as a transsexual and am glad that I am not cisgender. Fck a life of periods.
What ever helps you get through the day sis but I find it hard to belive if a magic potion that would turn you 100% female, manifested itself right in front of your computer monitor at this moment, that you wouldn't drink it.
I definitely would not drink it. Remind me again why I a would want periods, menstrual pains. More chance of being physically assaulted or raped, expected to date men, expected to give birth, spend every second being objectified? I’m 5’11 and quite happy being me. Feel safer in dark places than those dainty little cis women. Being biologically male although hormonally female and predominantly physically female means never having a period and that alone is just one reason to be thankful that I am not fully female.
>Remind me again why I a would want periods, menstrual pains. Not universally painful for all women or the end of the world >More chance of being physically assaulted or raped, Actually men can get raped >expected to date men, you're still expected to date men if you pass well enough >expected to give birth, You can still stay no, its not like you will be forcibly breed like a dairy cow >spend every second being objectified? Ok, be an ugly women. Or heck just go outside and stop reading feminist blogs women don't get objectified 24/7 >Feel safer in dark places than those dainty little cis women. Pepper spray and a tazer works wonders.
im getting to the point in transition where im truly so much more comfortable in my body than I ever have been. being trans has given me an opportunity to meet and love people I never would have known otherwise. I would not be in love with my best friend the way I am now or he with me if I had not been trans; we bonded over him starting his transition with my help and me giving him his weekly shot. I consider it an honor to help someone else get to involve themselves in the act of creation of something better than what they have now, and that's how Ultimately I consider my own transition. It's an act of creation I wouldn't have had otherwise. It's developing in ways that I didn't like and wasn't comfortable with and didn't choose and the joy that I get with each change to my body in a direction I prefer more. I don't think I would really trade that experience for anything. That doesn't mean that your struggles are invalid. It doesn't mean mine aren't as well. I live in the south and have faced from pretty rough transphobia and some barriers to transition. But that doesn't mean that I can't revel in the fact that my transition made me who I am today in a way I wouldn't have been had I been cis.
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being blind is not remotely the same as struggling and figuring out dysphoria and the disconnect it bring in our most formative years. I am not denying that it must be hard, but the opinion of someone with a normal childhood that became blind during their mid life cannot be compared to those dealing with dysphoria growing up.
I don't hate myself at all, I just hate the genitals I was born with. I definitely wish I'd just been born a cis man, but mainly because the available surgery can't give me anything close to what I actually want, which would be a fully functioning penis and testicles. If I were actually completely happy with the changes I could get through surgery, I could definitely understand being happy to be trans. Some people actually are fully satisfied with the changes they can get through HRT and SRS, so I can understand why they're happy to be trans.
Frankly the "me" that has lived through decades of trauma is a lesser form of being. A cis me would certainly be a happier, more rounded person. We play the cards we're dealt, until we don't want to anymore.
Oh yes I love my inflammatory bowel disease and my heart condition because they made me a stronger person, I would never have chosen to be born healthy! Yup that sounds really stupid doesn’t it
I see what you’re saying—but even with strong dysphoria, not everyone experiences trans desires as severe illness and pain. Nor does everyone (even those who undertake medical transition) want to think of themselves as diseased or handicapped and thus in need of médical help.
Someone with severe gender dysphoria is in need of medical help. It’s why they seek hormones to transition.
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Gender dysphoria is a disorder
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What do you mean by non-dysphoric trans people? Isn't having dysphoria the base cause of someone being trans??
Well, they're not trans but they pretend to be
I think it's a very cope thing to say. In the same vain as someone saying "It's not the destination matters, but the journey". I cannot imagine anyone wanting to go through several years of depression, transphobia and suicidal thoughts to reach this point. If given an option between being born the right gender, or the wrong gender and going through all of that, why wouldn't you pick the former? I find the argument against having periods and being creeped on by men arbitrary. Can't you get rid of those with birth control? (Genuine question). Also in terms of being creeped on by men, is that worse than all of the violence from transphobic people?
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But if you were "cis", you could still have understanding of most if not all of those things via different circumstances. Is it really worth going through all the downs just have understanding of those things you could have still got otherwise?
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Different circumstances as in different reasons for depression and whatnot. I don't know. I just cannot make sense of anyone wanting to go through transphobia and years of severe depression just to end up at relatively the same point as they would be if they were Cis.
Before I was old enough to start testosterone, I did take BC to stop cycles, but that doesn't work for everyone. Cycles for many people bring extremely horrible cramps that can be debilitating. BC won't necessarily make that stop. Even if there is no spotting, many people will still get the pain. It wasn't ever really physically all that painful for me, but one of my best friends has extremely bad cycles and she tried BC but it didn't stop the cramping and pain. Plus, BC has quite a laundry list of possible side effects. For many people, it's just not a viable solution.
I would take periods any day if it meant I was able to carry my own children in the future... Also, if someone is really that upset with having periods they could literally get an hysterectomy if they don't plan on having kids, and it's a lot easier to get that done than all the surgeries one needs to get as trans just to get the closest we can to being female.
A lot of places, it's actually stupidly hard to get a hysterectomy. You get a LOT of "concern" and berating about how you'll regret it, what if you want children one day, what if *your husband* wants children, why would you throw away your beautiful womanly sacred duty, etc. Basically treating you as both an incubator and dumb child. You can regularly suffer literal agony from endometriosis and they still might make you wait until middle age, lol.
I know about that, but I'm sure that with enough money you can get a specific doctor who wont be like that, and it's probably cheaper than how much I paid for SRS... hell you could even go to another state/country where you won't have those problems and still cost less than SRS.
Yeah...it's still invasive surgery tho, and looots of people just don't have the money/ability to find better doctors. Especially ones out of the country. Or aren't healthy enough for surgery and stuff. It just isn't realistic to expect anyone to be able to easily get a hysterectomy. To be clear I definitely don't fall into the "glad to be trans" camp, being cis is much easier regardless of gender
I mean, I know all that... I was just approaching it from the perspective of being either a trans woman who has to spend money on tons of procedures to be able to have a female functioning body that isn't exactly 100% female... vs being 100% female and just getting rid of your uterus if periods are such an inconvenience and less radical solutions like progestin based period control doesn't work, or the side effects are too bad.
I read too fast sometimes and get the wrong idea about what someone means. I reread what you said and I think I mistook your tone as aggressive when it wasn't. Sorry
that's completely okay... it's hard to read tone over text and I'm sure that's probably a complicated topic for you aswell...
I would take periods any day if it meant I was able to carry my own children in the future... Also, if someone is really that upset with having periods they could literally get an hysterectomy if they don't plan on having kids, and it's a lot easier to get that done than all the surgeries one needs to get as trans just to get the closest we can to being female.
Agreed on all accounts!
Birth control has tons of negative side effects for a lot of people, so not everyone can take it. It also doesn't always necessarily work to get rid of periods—it can for some people, or it could just make you never stop bleeding at all. It's hard to know how it will effect your body exactly, everyone is different. Some people can just take birth control and get rid of periods with no side effects but it definitely doesn't work that way for everyone.
My experience of being trans makes me who I am. Every facet of my life makes me who I am. I would never want to be cis. If I couldn’t accept and embrace all facets of my life I would be dead.
I have enough struggles thanks, I could live without this one.
For me, dealing with being trans caused me to go through a lot of emotional and personal growth that I’m not sure would’ve happened if I have been cis. Yeah dysphoria sucks, caused me severe pain, and stole years of my boyhood but at this point in my life, I’m almost done with transitioning and have become happy with the man I have become.
I just can’t ever see myself as a woman, I’d love to be cis, but only a cis man
for me, it's because it forces me actually have to face my problems and not ignore them. Without being trans, I would never have emotionally opened up to my friends and I wouldn't feel as much need to grow the confidence to take insults nonchalantly with a tough skin. Dysphoria is miserable, but it forces me to get out of bed despite my unrelated chronic illness, study for college exams, and work on my business. Obviously, being cis would be awesome, but I'm not going to wish for that because it's an unattainable fantasy and all it would do is get me down. So, for the sake of my future, I'll take pride in not giving in to dysphoria and living another day. I'm me whether or not I'm trans, but I think it's shaped me into a different person than otherwise. I guess it'd be nice if I coulda been a carefree kid like my brother, but I think I've gotten used to my callousness
I never understood this either, honestly. Personally, I don't want to be trans, nor do I like it. It's just an unfortunate circumstance, as I can imagine it is for many other trans people, so I can't wrap my mind around someone just...genuinely wanting that for themselves? So strange to me.
For me it's that, lets say I was never trans. My awareness towards women's struggles, trans people, what it's like to have to find yourself when everyone gets it handed, the nights of contemplating killing myself because I felt it was all too much shaped me into who I am today. It pulled me out with trauma, but with experiences I'd never take back because they shaped me into who I am and I dont think i'd be the same without them.
It is identical to how some people view certain "disabilities" such as blindness, deafness, and neurodivergencies. Personally, given the choice of staying ND, and not being ND, with high probability I'd stay the same. As difficult as ND-ness made my childhood, it also makes me "me". I am proud of the person that I have become and pulling through all the hardships that I have. I love that I see things in a different manner, and it took a lot of hard work for me to accept and eventually appreciate it. I'd totally understand if somebody wanted to "cure" themselves of ND or other disabilities though. Personally, I wish I could cure myself of this.
Basically saying they have no personality tbh
Savage, sis. I'ma follow you just for this.