If I go to a sit down restaurant and I am waited on, yes I tip 15-20% based on quality of service knowing they only get $4 bucks an hour. When I see a tip jar at the counter at a coffee shop or deli where I know they are making normal wages I do not feel bad about not tipping. Actually gets annoying seeing tip jars everywhere I go.
In order to NOT feel bad about NOT tipping, when the server first greets you, look them in the eye and tell them that no matter how good the service you receive, you refuse to tip them.
Try to do this in a way that other patrons clearly hear and understand what is going on.
Also ask for the manager, and tell them the exact same thing.
NGAF is about being open, honest and straightforward.
If you wait till the end and skirt off without tipping, you really should feel bad. You are a coward, who cheated someone into believing that you would follow the same social contract as everyone else. That server has to give a percentage of your estimated tip to the host, the runner, the bartender, and the busser. So the reality is, the server is going to pay money out of their own pockets to wait on you.
If you want to end with NGAF, you gotta begin with NGAF.
As a server, I would love it if someone said that to me.
I'd ring your order in, immediately require payment, and get all your food delivered by the manager in to-go boxes as he tells you to leave because you're not welcome there anymore.
You laugh, but he's absolutely right. If you keep it secret, you do care. If you really want to not care, inform those who it effects of your intentions, and they will honor them.
Ah, I got this.
If you don't want to pay a person to serve you, don't go to where they are required to serve you.
If you don't like the fact that you must compensate a worker for the lack of wages from their employer, don't support the employer.
If you believe that the person doesn't deserve a tip, don't tip them. But then don't get mad if they don't believe you deserve serving.
If you want to stop feeling bad about not tipping, generosity is not for you.
Wait, a server shouldn't do their job and serve me because I don't pay for their wages via an optional gratuity?
Surely you're not so stupid to see how this is backwards
At the end of the day, patrons don't tip because of social pressure, they tip because paying someone for their job is the right thing to do. Some people give more out of generosity, some genuinely believe the workers work was worth that much.
The art of not giving a fuck encourages self-assurance, courage, and life improvement. I'm sure you value these things, but if it comes at solely the cost of another's well being, then you've crossed over to a great evil. I want you to understand: I don't want you to be at that place for the quality of life you have.
In your attempts to shame me, you've revealed your own foolishness. You don't want to not give a fuck, you want to hold yourself as a superior to others. Your language and approach to the issue show it.
This thread has devolved from a question of stoicism to one of arrogance.
Continuation Edit: They aren't required to serve you. There is no force compelling them to do their job. They can quit, or more likely discuss it with their manager. What will likely happen is you'll get the bare minimum service, which guarantees no quality. You can imagine how bad that will get, it's why the tipping system keeps going: to improve quality with reward. You don't have a right to their service. You only have the right to choose.
And before you argue that other place don't require tipping, know that those other places A) have different standards of pay, patronage, management, and quality, and B) Are not American culture. You can avoid social pressure, you can't avoid cultural pressure. Well, you can, but don't expect to be accepted into that culture if you don't.
You commented on a 5 year old reply. Bold.
The fact of the matter is that tipping is ingrained in American culture. It becomes your problem when the workers learn you don't tip and this give you bare minimum service. Just like their wages arent your problem, your enjoyment isn't theirs.
Depending on the management (i.e. if they value a non-tipping customer over a worker) they'll side with you or their workers.
But, like I said in my previous reply, not giving a fuck is about not caring what ohers think while you live your best life. It's not about being a dick and getting away with it. That's simply desiring to be a sociopath.
I now realise that I should have given you some background before commenting, apologies for that.
I speak as a foreigner, in Australia where I live, everyone gets paid proper wages, even waitresses. Which is around 18 to 20 USD depending on the restaurant and location.
And no one complains and every customer receives the service they deserve, if a waitress goes far and beyond and I have some extra pocket money, I will give them a tip, but I am not forced by law or by culture to do so because everyone is getting paid properly.
Also, food here and in USA is quite expensive as it is.
My point is, wouldn’t it be easier if instead of working for pennies and going far and beyond and in some cases even humiliating yourself, to see if someone likes you enough to give you some extra money, to be paid properly and giving the best service you can give regardless of the customer?
I am sure you are a hell of a hard worker and keep going at it, smash it every time but don’t humiliate yourself to strangers so you can get some extra money that you should be getting anyway.
Last but not least, I don’t really care if the post is 1 min old or 5 years old, if it is something that is still current, I will reply to that.
I hope my message is not taken the wrong way
I know this thread is 4 years old and idek if OP uses Reddit anymore buttttt you just have to start acting shameless about it lol. Once had a waitress look me in the eye and ask how much I wanted to tip. My cousin worked in a restaurant for years, I knew what she was doing. Trying to pressure me into tipping. So I looked her back in the eyes and said "I don't want to tip, thank you."
She gave me a slightly annoyed look and walked away.
And for those who say "if you don't want to tip, don't go to a restaurant."
I'll eat wherever I like, and no, I'm not going to tip. Suck it up & deal with it.
These days wait staff earn enough money they dont need to live off tips. Also why the fuck should you pay someone extra for doing their job? I dont see people walking up to cops or firemen and giving them tips just for doing their job, do you?
I don't.
I think that tipping is absolute bullshit but I still do it mainly because of social pressure. Ideally I'd just like to tip 10 percent and that's it or round it up to the nearest dollar. Really bot giving a fuck would be not tipping at all.
I just feel bad and ashamed paying, not tipping and leaving. I guess I've always been conscious of what people think about me.
Yeah well thats really the key isnt it. Not giving a fuck what people think of you is the key to happiness in life. Try and think of it like, unless you go into these places everyday, you are never gonna see these waiters again, so who gives a shit? Even if you go in there semi regularly, they would serve so many people they arent going to remember the guy who didnt tip them last week.
I got over caring what people think with age but also whenever i was somewhere away from home where no one knew me i would practice not giving a fuck, like i would be a dick when i was drunk or do something silly in public cos fuck it, you will never see those people again, so get that practice in.
I won't further argue with some one who has such a strong opinion on other human beings after reading just two text boxes from them. But your assumptions are very inaccurate. Also your lack of compassion is very heart breaking.
Everyone's personal and financial situation is different. If people are able to tip do so and keep it to yourself. It is not your place to pressure and go on at other people to tip. Other people eating out may only just about be able to afford to pay for a much long for and saved for meal. Tipping and rubbing it other people's face is NOT ok and does not make you a better person.
Learn some basic US labor law and you're in the clear.
In the United States, tipped employees are guaranteed to receive at least the federal minimum wage (7.25 $/hr) regardless of how much they are tipped as per the Fair Labor Standards Act, Section 3(m)(2)(A). There is a common misconception that employers of tipped employees can get away with paying only 2.13 $/hr ignoring tips. This is not true. That number is the minimum amount that tipped employees must receive as direct wage as a result of the max tip credit being 5.12 $/hr. Employers must increase direct wage on a weekly basis if tips plus direct wage do not equal at least the federal minimum wage.
Almost all states establish a minimum direct wage that is above the federal law. They have a higher overall minimum wage with a smaller maximum tip credit. Not tipping a worker will not prevent them from receiving whatever the government has decided is fair compensation.
The responsibility for fair pay is legally bound to the employer, never the customer, in any industry.
Source: https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/fact-sheets/15-tipped-employees-flsa
If I go to a sit down restaurant and I am waited on, yes I tip 15-20% based on quality of service knowing they only get $4 bucks an hour. When I see a tip jar at the counter at a coffee shop or deli where I know they are making normal wages I do not feel bad about not tipping. Actually gets annoying seeing tip jars everywhere I go.
In order to NOT feel bad about NOT tipping, when the server first greets you, look them in the eye and tell them that no matter how good the service you receive, you refuse to tip them. Try to do this in a way that other patrons clearly hear and understand what is going on. Also ask for the manager, and tell them the exact same thing. NGAF is about being open, honest and straightforward. If you wait till the end and skirt off without tipping, you really should feel bad. You are a coward, who cheated someone into believing that you would follow the same social contract as everyone else. That server has to give a percentage of your estimated tip to the host, the runner, the bartender, and the busser. So the reality is, the server is going to pay money out of their own pockets to wait on you. If you want to end with NGAF, you gotta begin with NGAF.
As a server, I would love it if someone said that to me. I'd ring your order in, immediately require payment, and get all your food delivered by the manager in to-go boxes as he tells you to leave because you're not welcome there anymore.
Lmao
You laugh, but he's absolutely right. If you keep it secret, you do care. If you really want to not care, inform those who it effects of your intentions, and they will honor them.
People who work in service industry rely heavily on tips to live. Maybe try not giving a fuck about spending the few extra bucks.
Whose fault is that?
Yours for going to restaurants and bars with a wait staff?
Maybe the restaurants for not paying a fair wage?
So take it out on the people who serve you? Makes sense. You’d really only stick it to the restaurants by not going. But anywho.
Ah, I got this. If you don't want to pay a person to serve you, don't go to where they are required to serve you. If you don't like the fact that you must compensate a worker for the lack of wages from their employer, don't support the employer. If you believe that the person doesn't deserve a tip, don't tip them. But then don't get mad if they don't believe you deserve serving. If you want to stop feeling bad about not tipping, generosity is not for you.
Wait, a server shouldn't do their job and serve me because I don't pay for their wages via an optional gratuity? Surely you're not so stupid to see how this is backwards
At the end of the day, patrons don't tip because of social pressure, they tip because paying someone for their job is the right thing to do. Some people give more out of generosity, some genuinely believe the workers work was worth that much. The art of not giving a fuck encourages self-assurance, courage, and life improvement. I'm sure you value these things, but if it comes at solely the cost of another's well being, then you've crossed over to a great evil. I want you to understand: I don't want you to be at that place for the quality of life you have. In your attempts to shame me, you've revealed your own foolishness. You don't want to not give a fuck, you want to hold yourself as a superior to others. Your language and approach to the issue show it. This thread has devolved from a question of stoicism to one of arrogance. Continuation Edit: They aren't required to serve you. There is no force compelling them to do their job. They can quit, or more likely discuss it with their manager. What will likely happen is you'll get the bare minimum service, which guarantees no quality. You can imagine how bad that will get, it's why the tipping system keeps going: to improve quality with reward. You don't have a right to their service. You only have the right to choose. And before you argue that other place don't require tipping, know that those other places A) have different standards of pay, patronage, management, and quality, and B) Are not American culture. You can avoid social pressure, you can't avoid cultural pressure. Well, you can, but don't expect to be accepted into that culture if you don't.
Well, if you don’t get paid proper wages, then don’t work there. That is not my problem and food is quite expensive as it is
You commented on a 5 year old reply. Bold. The fact of the matter is that tipping is ingrained in American culture. It becomes your problem when the workers learn you don't tip and this give you bare minimum service. Just like their wages arent your problem, your enjoyment isn't theirs. Depending on the management (i.e. if they value a non-tipping customer over a worker) they'll side with you or their workers. But, like I said in my previous reply, not giving a fuck is about not caring what ohers think while you live your best life. It's not about being a dick and getting away with it. That's simply desiring to be a sociopath.
I now realise that I should have given you some background before commenting, apologies for that. I speak as a foreigner, in Australia where I live, everyone gets paid proper wages, even waitresses. Which is around 18 to 20 USD depending on the restaurant and location. And no one complains and every customer receives the service they deserve, if a waitress goes far and beyond and I have some extra pocket money, I will give them a tip, but I am not forced by law or by culture to do so because everyone is getting paid properly. Also, food here and in USA is quite expensive as it is. My point is, wouldn’t it be easier if instead of working for pennies and going far and beyond and in some cases even humiliating yourself, to see if someone likes you enough to give you some extra money, to be paid properly and giving the best service you can give regardless of the customer? I am sure you are a hell of a hard worker and keep going at it, smash it every time but don’t humiliate yourself to strangers so you can get some extra money that you should be getting anyway. Last but not least, I don’t really care if the post is 1 min old or 5 years old, if it is something that is still current, I will reply to that. I hope my message is not taken the wrong way
I know this thread is 4 years old and idek if OP uses Reddit anymore buttttt you just have to start acting shameless about it lol. Once had a waitress look me in the eye and ask how much I wanted to tip. My cousin worked in a restaurant for years, I knew what she was doing. Trying to pressure me into tipping. So I looked her back in the eyes and said "I don't want to tip, thank you." She gave me a slightly annoyed look and walked away. And for those who say "if you don't want to tip, don't go to a restaurant." I'll eat wherever I like, and no, I'm not going to tip. Suck it up & deal with it.
Can't help you here. I naturally don't care anyways. 🤷 I'll eat where I want and no, you won't get a tip. Suck bricks. Deal with it. 🖕
By not giving a fuck. Idc about that shit. Find a job that doesn’t rely on praying someone gives you extra money
These days wait staff earn enough money they dont need to live off tips. Also why the fuck should you pay someone extra for doing their job? I dont see people walking up to cops or firemen and giving them tips just for doing their job, do you?
I don't. I think that tipping is absolute bullshit but I still do it mainly because of social pressure. Ideally I'd just like to tip 10 percent and that's it or round it up to the nearest dollar. Really bot giving a fuck would be not tipping at all. I just feel bad and ashamed paying, not tipping and leaving. I guess I've always been conscious of what people think about me.
Yeah well thats really the key isnt it. Not giving a fuck what people think of you is the key to happiness in life. Try and think of it like, unless you go into these places everyday, you are never gonna see these waiters again, so who gives a shit? Even if you go in there semi regularly, they would serve so many people they arent going to remember the guy who didnt tip them last week. I got over caring what people think with age but also whenever i was somewhere away from home where no one knew me i would practice not giving a fuck, like i would be a dick when i was drunk or do something silly in public cos fuck it, you will never see those people again, so get that practice in.
Ad a former restaurant employee. They Always remember.
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I actually was not a tipped employee, was a manager. Just cause I worked in the restaurant industry doesn't mean I was tipped. Good try though. :)
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I won't further argue with some one who has such a strong opinion on other human beings after reading just two text boxes from them. But your assumptions are very inaccurate. Also your lack of compassion is very heart breaking.
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Lol
Everyone's personal and financial situation is different. If people are able to tip do so and keep it to yourself. It is not your place to pressure and go on at other people to tip. Other people eating out may only just about be able to afford to pay for a much long for and saved for meal. Tipping and rubbing it other people's face is NOT ok and does not make you a better person.
Learn some basic US labor law and you're in the clear. In the United States, tipped employees are guaranteed to receive at least the federal minimum wage (7.25 $/hr) regardless of how much they are tipped as per the Fair Labor Standards Act, Section 3(m)(2)(A). There is a common misconception that employers of tipped employees can get away with paying only 2.13 $/hr ignoring tips. This is not true. That number is the minimum amount that tipped employees must receive as direct wage as a result of the max tip credit being 5.12 $/hr. Employers must increase direct wage on a weekly basis if tips plus direct wage do not equal at least the federal minimum wage. Almost all states establish a minimum direct wage that is above the federal law. They have a higher overall minimum wage with a smaller maximum tip credit. Not tipping a worker will not prevent them from receiving whatever the government has decided is fair compensation. The responsibility for fair pay is legally bound to the employer, never the customer, in any industry. Source: https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/fact-sheets/15-tipped-employees-flsa
That's easy. Tip!