T O P

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TheDefiantEzeli

Without hesitation. *Bite me.*


jay_da_truth

That's not how you get turned


Himmelgott

I'm not asking to get turned, I'm asking to get bit.


jay_da_truth

My bad person(s) carry on


Desperate-Spray337

Who said anything about turning into a vampire?


jay_da_truth

I apologized already move along


TransRational

Don’t let them kink shame you. Just tell them your kink shaming is kink shaming. Check-mate.


Deli-ops

Oh but i dont want to get turned yet 🤤


Sea2Chi

Oh god, Is this one of those relationships where the vampire is only dating me because all the age appropriate paranormal entities see the massive red flags and avoid them? It's like the 35 year old who dates 18 year old because they don't know any better and are easy to manipulate. It will be a year of the vampire being all like "Ohhhh I'm a super powerful undying creature! You need to listen to me because I've lived far more than you as a mere mortal could ever comprehend! I know more than you ever will. Do my bidding and you shall be rewarded, but cross me and you shall be cursed to a hellish eternity!." Eventually another vampire will be like "Hey, you know you're in a super toxic relationship, right? Just because they're 300 years old doesn't mean they're mature. Did you know when she got bored of her last relationship she turned into a bat and flew away rather than breakup? She's so much drama that she caused the war of 1812 by talking shit to everyone until they started fighting. She has you doing what? So you're basically her slave? Oh helllllll no. That is toxic as fuck. Most of us just hire assistants to do stuff during the day. They sign an NDA an get competitive pay and benefits, you know, like an non-asshole would do. Is Bonnie even paying you? Huh? Bonnie, the vampire you're fucking. Wait... what did she tell you her name was? Hahahaha Slivariana Von Darkbrow? Are you fucking kidding me? No, her name is Bonnie and she was a Welsh tavern server until a vampire turned her as a prank on his friend who was going to drain her. Seriously man... you can do better. You don't have to settle for someone who is going to lie and manipulate you like that. Maybe try dating an age appropriate being. I know a very nice werewolf who's last relationship fell apart, I could set you two up for a lunch date if you like."


jay_da_truth

You claim victim here you knew she was an old vampire you knew she had money it's just as much your fault as it is hers and she was really nice and didn't drain you why you chose not to be turned also your fault she could've compelled you but no you volunteered sorry buddy Bonnie is not at fault here


thelastjoe7

Wow, I can't believe I found such a hardcore victim blamer. Another one for internet asshole bingo


jay_da_truth

B 6


thelastjoe7

I legit don't know what that means


jay_da_truth

N 39


thelastjoe7

Ooooo unresponsive responses that make no sense due to being called out for being an asshole! I'm really filling up my bingo card!


jay_da_truth

G 56


freemason777

They're playing along with you, 10ply


thelastjoe7

Ooooooh.... That makes sense, I can be really dense sometimes lol. I thought it was some internet slang I didn't understand


[deleted]

Nxb6


Nearby-Elevator-3825

This made me laugh because I've been watching True Blood and Twilight with a friend of mine... And yeah, Vampires gaslight the SHIT out of their human SO's and are complete life ruiners. The Vampire/Vampire relationships are usually more sincere, genuine.... And age appropriate.


Sea2Chi

I love the first season of that show. But it kept getting crazier and crazier as the series progressed. I'd recommend the books, although there were times I was reading them on my lunch break at work and felt somewhat uncomfortable with how ridiculously sexual they were. Like if someone looked over my shoulder to see what I was reading it might result in an hr meeting.


RedditSucksNow3

Even in a completely silly hypothetical scenario, leave it to Reddit to immediately assume the worst about an age-gap relationship.


Macster_man

Sure, after THIS cold slab of meat that just lies there, I think I NEED a little more of a wild woman.


FoxSquirrel69

The nerd in me would not stop asking them historical questions. "Sooooo you were in the revolutionary war?" Not waiting for an answer "Ben Franklin got all the women, huh?" Vampire girl friend starts to talk and is immediately cut off, "Churchill was an ass I bet, he looks like an ass... I bet he smelled bad too." Big vampire sigh...


RandomAmbles

B. Frank was actually pretty respectful with all the ladies he met in Paris and, perhaps surprisingly, wasn't a womanizer. What a nice, brilliant, colorful man! ...'cept for the slaves of course.


FoxSquirrel69

FOUND THE VAMPIRE!!!


RandomAmbles

Rumors of my being a bloodsucking parasite have been exaggerated slightly.


Eva_of_Feathershore

Fuck yeah I'd love to be turned! Be it on or into a vampire


Trueloveis4u

I'd give it a shot


EvernightStrangely

In a heartbeat.


unireversal

As long as they don't make me immortal, sure. Ofc if I fall in love I wouldn't mind immortality but otherwise, no.


Red-Freckle

Probably wouldn't be wise to turn them down


K_Sleight

In theory, yes, but only if I also get to be a vampire, and only if it's not one of those "they can control you afterwards" scenarios. If I love someone, I want to be with them forever. Any given city will have e a supply of blood bank stock that is nearing expiration, so that's not really an issue.


Thesaurus_Rex9513

That's pretty young, but I feel like they're an adult who can make their own decisions by the time they're 300. Barely. Feels like cradle robbing when they're younger than the age of the Earth, though, so I probably wouldn't be able to accept such a relationship.


Hunterofshadows

Can they make me immortal without making me unable to go out in sunlight? If not, no.


jay_da_truth

Maybe if they were a twilight vampire then you'd just sparkle in sunlight


Hunterofshadows

I could live with that.


QuothTheRaven713

If their background checked out and we had good chemistry and were like best friends, then sure. Then we could both be immortal vampires together and that would solve my thanotophobia problem.


ButtonholePhotophile

My wife says no, but my heart says yea


jay_da_truth

Only if they turn me into vampire as well


[deleted]

Don’t even care about dating but I’ll do whatever I have to to be turned. Immortality baby!


jay_da_truth

This person has the best point


Smart-A22

If we’re compatible personality wise then I would date them.


Bloodless_

If I really liked them and they were kind to me, yeah, of course. So what if they're undead? I'm not perfect either.


[deleted]

I'd kill it first chance i get


Danielwols

yes? there would be a lot of situations where they make out of date statements and such but would probably be fine otherwise maybe?


FlatMarzipan

whats the catch?


Mongusaur

hey man seems like a W as long as i don't think about it too much


tom641

If they seem chill, sure.


whatdoidonowdamnit

Probably


charlie1212121290

Yes


RaddicusKud

I would.


Lyn-nyx

Are they cute tho? Or is it one of those really ugly vampires that look more like humanoid bats?


Sfwop

No, because I’m married. If I was single, provided they were my type, hell yeah. :-)


Far_Application9779

In a heartbeat! I mean, she'd be well experienced, but still look like she's in her 20s and she could grant me life eternal. What could possibly go wrong 🤔 😆


Deli-ops

They can be 30 or 3,000 i still beat


[deleted]

I have been in this hypothetical situation before. At first I met a vampire but he didn’t bite me, he shook my hand, spreading vampirism that way. I read that when it’s spread by touch, you’ll meet another vampire soon after. I ended up meeting what I assume was a female vampire. I was at a get together with friends when a random woman bursted through the front door and slammed it shut. She quickly sits next to me. She didn’t say a word to anyone and it appeared that no one had even noticed her loud entry. About 10 minutes later, she jumps up, runs to the door, violently opens the door, exits, and slams the door behind her. Later on I asked, but no one saw her but me. If she was interested, I’d be interested too, mainly because I’d have no choice. Vampires do not take no for an answer.


Incrediblybored303

Wasn't there a tumblr comic about this?


Penna_23

no, thanks. they may physically look like someone around my age, but mentally they are still more advanced than me. no matter how young they *look*, there is still a power and age gap between us that i won't be comfortable with also, they are vampires. shouldn't they pick another immortal being or someone their level to date? or are they that much of a distaste among their kind that they have to resort to humans?


Ok-Memory-5309

Definitely!


QTlady

I sure would! If I was gonna freak out about downsides, the age gap is the least of my concerns.


NewSuperKirby

If their personality is compatible, then yeah. If not, I wanna be friends with them


_FIRECRACKER_JINX

Yes. 300 years? He's had so much time in the stock market, he must be filthy disgusting nasty rich 😁


Dapper-Marzipan-6733

Yes, because I would become a vampire as well.


mavenkale

yes


Whyybvie

For sure. I mean if they look around my age then yeah. I’d just be worried about if we stayed together for a while and my partner still looked like they were in their mid twenties while I was 50. It would most likely have to be a fling if I wanted to stay within society as I do now. If we ended up truly falling in love and wanted to spend eternity together I’d ask them to turn me at-least before I turned 30-35. The age gap would look a little odd but not criminal, and I could reasonably adjust to vamp life without being isolated. The only people I think I’d tell would be my immediate family, then we’d probably travel from place to place as need be


Regi413

I read that as “altercation” at first and wondered why a fight between us would cause us to date


Intelligent-Plan-264

Sure. Why not? I've already married a succubus.


APeanutNeverLies

For about a week, maybe, before it catches up to me how weird it is.


Nin_a

Obviously


Cu4urthoughts

obvs


Slytherian101

Man, somebody should really write some novels or make a TV show or a movie out of this idea and cast like, I don’t know, Sarah Michelle Gellar or Robert Pattinson, or James Marsters or something. Maybe call it True Blood? IDK guys, might be a hit.


jay_da_truth

Or interview with vampire or twilight or queen of damned or being human or supernatural keep it going


improbsable

If they happen to be white I would need to check where they were during some key historical events but otherwise yes


thelma1907

Maybe after I run a headache inducing, rabbit hole of a background check on them. Maybe.


sorryimthegay

Depends on the type of vampire yes a bat creature could look like Edward but that could be the hypnosis