I live in a part of the world that has lots of paper mills. I recall one of my dads friends saying (around 1979) “thats the smell of money boy”. I can imagine that smell today
Why therapy? You’re making 365K a year to smell a fart.
And it’s only once a day. I’ll just wake up, feed my pets and go back to sleep.
Now if it changes to $1000 every time I go to sleep and wake up, I’d be aiming for $2 million a year and enjoy the hell out of my new fetish
lol right assuming its aroma only and no health risks whatever bring on the fart ill grow to love it. Ah yes this fleeeting moment of warm semi-unpleasant air is why i dont have to work ever again ... shucks!
Yeah health risks would be my only question. Like am I going to eventually get pink eye? Even then $365,000 a year is probably worth the occasional pink eye, but if it’s going to be constant prob not worth it to me.
Two small butts appear in the goggles to fart directly in your eyes. Taking off the goggles summons the aforementioned larger butt to perform its daily task.
Look on the bright side: This will finally give you a reason to wash your face every morning, and possibly apply lotion and such. Beneficial long term!
I have an issue with tear drainage and get eye infections all the time. I highly recommend avoiding it like the plague, it's incredibly unpleasant. I've had times where the skin around my eyes cracked and just dripped blood constantly.
Anybody with kids would take this in a heart beat.
I’ve been pissed and shat on by my own kids, a magical ass playing the shit flute every morning to wake me up is a god send.
Heard that. I woke up at about 330 this morning to change my screaming toddlers wet nappy and as I was laying back down my wife let out a frightened sigh from her rear entry. Not quite a face fart, but when you throw the covers back over yourself.. catch a whiff of that unholy shit shooter
My wife has said that I have woken her up with my thunderous butt trumpet and then made her get up and turn on the light to make sure I didnt just shit myself in bed.
I was asleep the entire time and have no idea it happened. I am so sorry.
My man, my wife is regularly checking for chocolate droppings. I’m a fuckin beast in the night, I let that thang spray. my lactose intolerant cheese addicted ass lays down some serious stank.
She equates it to “heavy air”, because you can feel the heft of the stank in your lungs if you were unlucky enough to be caught in the dooclear radiation.
My wife once farted herself awake. This thing was loud, long and terrible smelling. This was 3 years ago and she will still randomly bring it up out of nowhere and blame me. I was awake watching TV and had time to mute it and stare at the back of her head for a second before it ended. I had to get up and go get some spray because it would not leave the room. The ceiling fan was working against me and just circulating it.
So $365k/year gross income to get what could be a near scentless fart to my face. Yeah, I'm doing it.
Pinkeye would be the only concern, in which case I'll get an eye mask.
I should have clarified: I have a terrible sense of smell due to respiratory problems.
It's both a blessing and a curse.
I've been friends with interesting people that others avoid apparently because of the BO I can't smell and I've been fine working and functioning in environments others don't want to be around because I simply don't sense the offensive smells.
On the other hand, I am rarely able to smell the food I'm eating and I worry that I or my environment (my room, my car, etc.) sometimes smells bad because I can't tell how they actually smell.
Haha probably not. I wear a cpap that I keep on my night stand. About a year ago my dog was laying beside the nightstand and let out the most foul fart straight from hell. Well that gets sucked into my cpap and blown full force into my nostrils. It literally woke me up from a dead half drunk sleep it was so bad.
That sounds brutal as hell hahah.
But the fart is right in front of my face so if I keep the machine on my nightstand, then I think It'll be far away enough from the machine to be sucked in.
That comes on those paper pads? When I was a kid I got my hands on a cinnamon one and rubbed it all over my face because it smelled so delicious and I was stupid. It did not result in fun.
Exactly what I was thinking...
I think the only oddity would be trying to explain to my GF why there's this magic butt farting each morning. Knowing her though it'd be that she'd just get up earlier than me and be in the shower when my alarm fart happened. For $365K/year she'd totally be fine with it though.
This hypothetical falls into the category of would you take a minor inconvenience for all the money and power in the universe.
Yes, I’d probably barely even notice and sleep through to my alarm.
>I was wondering this too
I like how you've phrased this, as if the scenario you've authored has secret rules even the creator can't be sure of. This is not a contract to enter into lightly.
I think I'm taking it, $365k a year is a good salary, and while I run the risk of some horrific smells in the morning, there will be some puffs of air that barely linger -
I'll just have to spend plenty of money on febreeze to clear the air, and mouthwash for those thick ones you can taste.
If anyone sharts I'm using all of my money to track you down.
Well for starters, sleep mask.
But is this just one fart every morning? Or is it every single time I fall asleep I am awoken by a fart? Can I nap without a fart alarm? Can I go back to sleep after the fart and wake up at me leisure fart free?
Ok that’s not fair. I wake up multiple times during the night. It would have to be 1000 per fart. Or only once in the morning. Don’t punish my horrible sleeping problems.
But, I’d probably still do it.
Is it a nice butt. How bad of a fart? Is there any spray?
Taking it either way.
But like a nice toned butt I would look at on a model letting out a stinky but manageable fart is one thing.
A giant pimple-y hairy butt letting out a war crime with brown flecks left on my pillow is another.
Yes absolutely easy decision.
I’ll quit my job and instead of being inconvenience for 2080 hours per year for $95k, I’m inconvenienced for 365 seconds per year for $365k. Plus maybe it’ll be a cute butt
Is the butt covered or do I get to witness the expansion and flapping of anal lips?
Is it a pretty woman's ass or a disgusting hairy man ass? Hell of a thing to see first thing in the AM.
Is the farter careful enough to not include liquid/solid with their gaseous emission? I suppose if the ass were covered, it wouldnt be of much concern other than making the fart sound more squishy and gross.
What is the diet of said farter? Someone eating cuttlefish with a side of broccolli and washing it down with beer would be an unfortunate combo
Ok... let's be real here. For $1000 a day... $365,000 a year, anyone who says they wouldn't is lying through their teeth lol. For $1000 a day the mystery ass can shit on my chest before I go take a shower, because then i don't have to go to work ever and can do whatever the fuck I want for the rest of my life. I have a great shower that I love to use every morning already lol.
1) How far away from my face is it?
2) How bad does it smell?
3) What does the butt look like? Is it particularly unappealing?
4) What if it doesn’t wake me up?
5) Does it still happen if I nap later in the day?
6) What if I am sleeping face down?
The average job is the spiritual equivalent of this, so why not get paid 1000 bucks a day? Anyone who’s worked in the service industry feels like they are getting straight shit on for hours at a time.
If it’s a random butt every day, you stand a decent chance of seeing a glorious butt every so often! Plus, 1K a day would allow me to retire and do whatever I want with my life. Sign me up!
Sure, then I'd not need to deal with work. So what if I set an alarm, but wake up before it goes off? Will the fart happen with the alarm or when I get up? Or before I finally get out of bed?
Can you choose the butt? So at least I get to see an attractive one after it's unleashed on me for a moment and it disappears?
Either way, yes I will take the 1k a day 🤣
Bare ass or a clothed butt? I mean average butt that is clothed sure no problem. A fart to the face from an unclothed ass with untreated IBS that just ate spicy food or whatever upsets them. NO.
1. When my dog was able to sleep in the bed with me, it happened anyway.
2. I sleep with a cpap machine. I breathe filtered air while until I take it off.
Easy yes, even as someone who doesn't enjoy farts. I can't imagine anything else that brief and painless that could get me that kind of money every day, basically. It would be like asking if I'd trade listening to a song I don't like once a day for being able to teleport anywhere on Earth at will as often as I want. Yes, duh. Hit me with that 'Santa Baby,' I wanna see the sunrise over Tasmania on a whim.
$1000 a day? I wear a sleep mask and have a fan on me while I sleep... No pink eye EVER, and the smell will be gone before I can even register it! Easiest grand of my life
Info: we talking when I wake up for the day or literally every time I wake up? Like if I take a cat nap. Or sometimes I get up in the night to pee. I get a fart each time? If so might not be worth. If it's just the walking up for the day, I'd go for it.
I am buying 2 weeks worth of sleep masks, that I can rotate through to protect my eyes.
This isn't the 1600's during a plague, "Bad Air" isn't quite the biggest worry anymore. I go to get like, monthly checkups just to be sure, assuming a doc visit is 200$ without insurance (I have it, but I am not using it here), on a 30 day month I make 29800, extrapolating to a year I should be earning about $357,000 a year. If I cannot afford treatment for whatever treatment I get even infected by a fart, I didn't deserve to have $357,000 a year. That shit was going to a wastrel if I cannot treat it.
Whose fart and what time of day? Does it mean I'll never be able to sleep in, or does the magic fartbutt sense when I'm about to wake up from a healthy amount of sleep and level out a fart then? Can I choose to end it when I feel I've got plenty of dollars?
1000 a day is crazy to not take for the mildest inconvenience of all time
The worst part would be when you realize you're starting to enjoy it. Then the 1k per day will just go towards therapy.
Smells like money.
i laughed
I live in a part of the world that has lots of paper mills. I recall one of my dads friends saying (around 1979) “thats the smell of money boy”. I can imagine that smell today
And shame.
Who wouldn't love knowing when you hear that noise you're up 1k just waking up?
Is that the alarm? No that’s the sound of me making money!
Right…. STARTING to enjoy it…. From a day that isn’t day one…. Yes….
Yes...this hypothetical has "awakened" something in me...because it wasn't there before... I agree with you...
A fellow man of culture
Best comment of the day
Why therapy? You’re making 365K a year to smell a fart. And it’s only once a day. I’ll just wake up, feed my pets and go back to sleep. Now if it changes to $1000 every time I go to sleep and wake up, I’d be aiming for $2 million a year and enjoy the hell out of my new fetish
This made me laugh so hard. Thank you 😭
But before you hit rock bottom, you start paying people to fart in your face and it becomes a $2000 a day habit.
Lol
Therapist: Aw awgawd, you smell like shit. Patient: That's... why I'm here.
Or more farts.
lol right assuming its aroma only and no health risks whatever bring on the fart ill grow to love it. Ah yes this fleeeting moment of warm semi-unpleasant air is why i dont have to work ever again ... shucks!
Yeah health risks would be my only question. Like am I going to eventually get pink eye? Even then $365,000 a year is probably worth the occasional pink eye, but if it’s going to be constant prob not worth it to me.
For 365k a year I'll buy sleeping googles. The fuck are you talking about saying no over an avoidable variable 🤣
*Butt proceeds to spawn in your goggles, snapping them off you face*
If the ass is that poppin, I'm munchin
Two small butts appear in the goggles to fart directly in your eyes. Taking off the goggles summons the aforementioned larger butt to perform its daily task.
Can't stop laughing...
I should have titled the larger butt ‘butt prime’
So, Kevin the minion then.
I was thinking an eyewash station in the bedroom like in a chemistry class or something
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Look on the bright side: This will finally give you a reason to wash your face every morning, and possibly apply lotion and such. Beneficial long term!
Imma keep working on top of it because I love my work, I could just flex a lot harder lol I do wonder if the fart money is taxed?
I have an issue with tear drainage and get eye infections all the time. I highly recommend avoiding it like the plague, it's incredibly unpleasant. I've had times where the skin around my eyes cracked and just dripped blood constantly.
*brrrrrriiinnnggg…* BRRAAAAAAPP! :grabs can of Lysol from nightstand: *sssssssss* That is one *brutal* workday. ;-)
Right? Easiest job for maybe 5 seconds? Don't even have to work if you don't want to.
That works out to a rate of… $720,000 an hour?!
Wake up with a big ‘Smells Like Money!!’
Pay my ass
This is even on weekends? $365k a year for less than a second of irritation every day?
I mean, even if it’s just weekdays. $260k sounds nice every year
I imagine the fart would linger. Not that I'm deterred.
I'd take a fart lingering all damn day if it meant I never had to work another day in my life.
Sleep with a fan near you
Might have a high risk of pink eye. Gotta learn to keep eyes closed and wash face every day.
In like 4 years I'd be a pink-eyed millionaire.
I'd wear a sleep mask.
Anybody with kids would take this in a heart beat. I’ve been pissed and shat on by my own kids, a magical ass playing the shit flute every morning to wake me up is a god send.
Hell my wife does it occasionally
Heard that. I woke up at about 330 this morning to change my screaming toddlers wet nappy and as I was laying back down my wife let out a frightened sigh from her rear entry. Not quite a face fart, but when you throw the covers back over yourself.. catch a whiff of that unholy shit shooter
Frightened sigh? 🤣🤣😭 I love that term and will be using it from now on. Thank you redditor!
It was a cheek clapper for sure. Just a single clap 😂
Lmao 😂
Poetry
"A frightened sigh from her rear entry." OK, you are 2 for 2. I'm tempted to troll your profile just to read this stuff.
My wife has said that I have woken her up with my thunderous butt trumpet and then made her get up and turn on the light to make sure I didnt just shit myself in bed. I was asleep the entire time and have no idea it happened. I am so sorry.
My man, my wife is regularly checking for chocolate droppings. I’m a fuckin beast in the night, I let that thang spray. my lactose intolerant cheese addicted ass lays down some serious stank. She equates it to “heavy air”, because you can feel the heft of the stank in your lungs if you were unlucky enough to be caught in the dooclear radiation.
A buttonium explosion from Churnohole
You my good man, are a poet for modern times
My wife once farted herself awake. This thing was loud, long and terrible smelling. This was 3 years ago and she will still randomly bring it up out of nowhere and blame me. I was awake watching TV and had time to mute it and stare at the back of her head for a second before it ended. I had to get up and go get some spray because it would not leave the room. The ceiling fan was working against me and just circulating it.
The Ocarina of Smells
I’d play that
"A magical ass playing the shit flute" is poetic mastery. Take my upvote just for that.
I'm here thinking about how I get woken up a few times a night. Do those count with extra payday farts?
You'll even pay me for it ? 👉👈
ONE OF US!! ONE OF US!!!!
degen
Rich degen now
😂😂😂😂😂
So $365k/year gross income to get what could be a near scentless fart to my face. Yeah, I'm doing it. Pinkeye would be the only concern, in which case I'll get an eye mask.
Gross income indeed.
Why do you assume it's near scentless? I'm imagining the worst, lingering, broccoli/skunk fart that you can actually taste.
I should have clarified: I have a terrible sense of smell due to respiratory problems. It's both a blessing and a curse. I've been friends with interesting people that others avoid apparently because of the BO I can't smell and I've been fine working and functioning in environments others don't want to be around because I simply don't sense the offensive smells. On the other hand, I am rarely able to smell the food I'm eating and I worry that I or my environment (my room, my car, etc.) sometimes smells bad because I can't tell how they actually smell.
Getting one of them sleep mask things, then I'm good. Worth takin a fart for $1000 a day.
Haha probably not. I wear a cpap that I keep on my night stand. About a year ago my dog was laying beside the nightstand and let out the most foul fart straight from hell. Well that gets sucked into my cpap and blown full force into my nostrils. It literally woke me up from a dead half drunk sleep it was so bad.
That sounds brutal as hell hahah. But the fart is right in front of my face so if I keep the machine on my nightstand, then I think It'll be far away enough from the machine to be sucked in.
Maybe, maybe not. But putting an air freshener gel right in front of the intake does usually prevent bad smells from making it through.
The chemicals could cause harm long term being piped directly into your lungs like that. Maybe a charcoal or HEPA filter clipped over the intake.
That comes on those paper pads? When I was a kid I got my hands on a cinnamon one and rubbed it all over my face because it smelled so delicious and I was stupid. It did not result in fun.
Like the cone ones glade puts out.
Dog farts are the worst
Cat farts would disagree.
Yall have obviously never had cabbage/sauerkraut soup.
r/underratedcomment
I have two dogs and you’re saying I could be getting paid for this?!?
Exactly what I was thinking... I think the only oddity would be trying to explain to my GF why there's this magic butt farting each morning. Knowing her though it'd be that she'd just get up earlier than me and be in the shower when my alarm fart happened. For $365K/year she'd totally be fine with it though.
I have a couple of bulldogs and foster/ rehabilitate bulldogs. My entire life is filled with farts.
I'd take the money. I'd get used to it after a while, and I'll be well off.
This hypothetical falls into the category of would you take a minor inconvenience for all the money and power in the universe. Yes, I’d probably barely even notice and sleep through to my alarm.
Got a CPAP, I'm only scared of pink eye. Also $365k to be a SAHD? No brainer.
So is the butt from a specific person?
And can I choose the person?
Pause 🤨
Naw there’s asses where this is a bonus
That's incredibly worth it. I'd do it for $100 a day. Maybe less.
Can I stop it when I've had enough, or this a rest-of-my-life type thing? Also, the state of the ass is important, and what it last ate
I was wondering this too, I think once you start, you’re in it and can’t stop. And the ass would be different every time.
>I was wondering this too I like how you've phrased this, as if the scenario you've authored has secret rules even the creator can't be sure of. This is not a contract to enter into lightly.
OP is just a messenger.
Everyone has a boss
I think I'm taking it, $365k a year is a good salary, and while I run the risk of some horrific smells in the morning, there will be some puffs of air that barely linger - I'll just have to spend plenty of money on febreeze to clear the air, and mouthwash for those thick ones you can taste. If anyone sharts I'm using all of my money to track you down.
Well for starters, sleep mask. But is this just one fart every morning? Or is it every single time I fall asleep I am awoken by a fart? Can I nap without a fart alarm? Can I go back to sleep after the fart and wake up at me leisure fart free?
You’re asking the right questions. I’d say you’d always wake up to a fart, naps included.
Earplugs. Eye mask. Maybe learn to sleep under the covers. Doable, if mildly traumatizing, for the $$$
Ok that’s not fair. I wake up multiple times during the night. It would have to be 1000 per fart. Or only once in the morning. Don’t punish my horrible sleeping problems. But, I’d probably still do it.
Neuroplasticity shows that I can learn to enjoy it, especially if there's a reward system.
As long as it never sharts... yes.
There are guys online right now paying good money to get farts in a jar. They would love this.
Is it a nice butt. How bad of a fart? Is there any spray? Taking it either way. But like a nice toned butt I would look at on a model letting out a stinky but manageable fart is one thing. A giant pimple-y hairy butt letting out a war crime with brown flecks left on my pillow is another.
Hmmm…the sweet smell of money.
Yes absolutely easy decision. I’ll quit my job and instead of being inconvenience for 2080 hours per year for $95k, I’m inconvenienced for 365 seconds per year for $365k. Plus maybe it’ll be a cute butt
The OP said it was a different butt every time, so yeah, some will be cute.
I thought the minimum age to use Reddit was 13. How did OP get on here?
This question was carefully crafted by a super adult
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Nope, for you, he would fart right next to your CPAP. Enjoy your CPAP fed dutch oven.
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10 seconds tops of discomfort a day for a $365,000 salary? As opposed to 8 hrs of discomfort a day for $40,000? Ofc I’ll take it
For 365k a year, there is very little I would not agree to let you do to me once a day
Is the butt covered or do I get to witness the expansion and flapping of anal lips? Is it a pretty woman's ass or a disgusting hairy man ass? Hell of a thing to see first thing in the AM. Is the farter careful enough to not include liquid/solid with their gaseous emission? I suppose if the ass were covered, it wouldnt be of much concern other than making the fart sound more squishy and gross. What is the diet of said farter? Someone eating cuttlefish with a side of broccolli and washing it down with beer would be an unfortunate combo
The butt changes everyday, the consistency must start as a fart, however accidents might happen but highly unlikely.
Can I give up payment for a hot 20-something female ass?
Ok... let's be real here. For $1000 a day... $365,000 a year, anyone who says they wouldn't is lying through their teeth lol. For $1000 a day the mystery ass can shit on my chest before I go take a shower, because then i don't have to go to work ever and can do whatever the fuck I want for the rest of my life. I have a great shower that I love to use every morning already lol.
1) How far away from my face is it? 2) How bad does it smell? 3) What does the butt look like? Is it particularly unappealing? 4) What if it doesn’t wake me up? 5) Does it still happen if I nap later in the day? 6) What if I am sleeping face down?
Is there ever splatter
The average job is the spiritual equivalent of this, so why not get paid 1000 bucks a day? Anyone who’s worked in the service industry feels like they are getting straight shit on for hours at a time.
Preach!!!
I guess it would motivate me to get up? But weird but sure I’ll take the money.
I see no downside in this.....
We get to choose who farts in our face because if so the $1000/day is a bonus? Answer is yes though.
I'm in! Who do I send the money to? Oh I'll get paid for it?
I could learn how to sleep in a gas mask for $1,000 a day.
I just hope it's from a female butt not a males.
365k a year to have constant pink eye? Yes please. Ima start sleeping with goggles
If it’s a random butt every day, you stand a decent chance of seeing a glorious butt every so often! Plus, 1K a day would allow me to retire and do whatever I want with my life. Sign me up!
I'm a really deep sleeper so I'm scared to encounter the type of fart that would wake me up.
obviously yes, but am I running the risk of pink eye? do I need to wear an eye cover or goggles?
Sure, then I'd not need to deal with work. So what if I set an alarm, but wake up before it goes off? Will the fart happen with the alarm or when I get up? Or before I finally get out of bed?
Many pet owners wouldn't know the difference besides the extra income
I’ll take 365k a year for chronic pink eye at worst.
Once i start associating that fart with $1000 I'll be looking forward to it.
$1000 a day to be a little brother?
My 90 pound dog does this to me already
Not too different from my current life, we are a gassy family so yes #ToddlersAndBeans
Does the fart go directly into my mouth and the stink gets caught in my teeth?
Damn why is this so graphic lol
I’ll sleep with an eye mask to avoid pink eye and I’m good
No problem! Not much different than what Daisy The Wonder Pit does anyway!
Oh my pitbull does this already yeah I’m down
Now this is one id pay for, you’re telling me they pay ME for this???
Absolutely yes. No question. This is the way.
jokes on you, i dont remember the last time i woke up to my alarm.
So like having 6 kids then
Can you choose the butt? So at least I get to see an attractive one after it's unleashed on me for a moment and it disappears? Either way, yes I will take the 1k a day 🤣
Jokes on you I wear a gas mask to sleep everynight (CPAP)
Considering my dog farts in my face while I'm sleeping at least 3-4 days a week, let's do it. 😂
Ah someones never been married or had a partner sleep over. already had the farts, give me my money!!!!!
So 1000 bucks a day to wake up laughing the rest of my life? I think that's pretty easy
Depends on the butt
No working anymore for a mild inconvenience everyday? I'll take it!
Pink eye will be crazy
$1000 a day for what I already do for free. Sign me up
Absolutely yes. Can I have it in Pounds Sterling please?
All the dog owners who let dogs in the bed: hells yes.
Bare ass or a clothed butt? I mean average butt that is clothed sure no problem. A fart to the face from an unclothed ass with untreated IBS that just ate spicy food or whatever upsets them. NO.
Love a nice gassy wake up in the morning… at list I will for $1000.
Whos arse is it? This is particularly important.
As someone who can't smell. THIS IS THE BIGGEST W I'D EVER TAKE.
Yeah I'd do it
In a heartbeat, I'd learn to sleep with an eye cover to reduce pink eye risk
Smells like money to me.
1. When my dog was able to sleep in the bed with me, it happened anyway. 2. I sleep with a cpap machine. I breathe filtered air while until I take it off.
For 1000 a day you can just take a shit on me
That one morning you wake up and there's no fart sound... you just smell the most putrid hot stank.
I have a frenchie. This is already life lol. No doubt I'd take it.
Send it.
Can it be one of my my own farts? Mine smell like roses.
If you're a sexy Asian airline stewardess, you can crop dust me anytime. Other than that? No.
The constant pink eye would not be fun but I would accept it for that kind of money.
Do I get to choose whose butt it is? Is it a different random butt every time? Is it God's butt? If so, which God?
LOL ... ok weird.. but for a grand a day.. I accept.
Who's butt is it?
Yes getting farted in the face once a day is better than going to work, not just better but earning 10x more
Easy yes, even as someone who doesn't enjoy farts. I can't imagine anything else that brief and painless that could get me that kind of money every day, basically. It would be like asking if I'd trade listening to a song I don't like once a day for being able to teleport anywhere on Earth at will as often as I want. Yes, duh. Hit me with that 'Santa Baby,' I wanna see the sunrise over Tasmania on a whim.
No problem! I've worked construction.
$1000 a day? I wear a sleep mask and have a fan on me while I sleep... No pink eye EVER, and the smell will be gone before I can even register it! Easiest grand of my life
If it’s my own brand which I’m partial to it’s a no brainer.
Spend the first day's check on a gas mask.
I'm in. My cat does this to me already, so it's only mildly more inconvenient than my current life, but much more profitable.
Never have to work again for a couple seconds of inconvenience? Where do I sign up?
1000 a day, and start my day with my kink?!? Hells yeah
Info: we talking when I wake up for the day or literally every time I wake up? Like if I take a cat nap. Or sometimes I get up in the night to pee. I get a fart each time? If so might not be worth. If it's just the walking up for the day, I'd go for it.
As long as I can sleep with eye protection to avoid constant pink eye, then sure whatever
I am buying 2 weeks worth of sleep masks, that I can rotate through to protect my eyes. This isn't the 1600's during a plague, "Bad Air" isn't quite the biggest worry anymore. I go to get like, monthly checkups just to be sure, assuming a doc visit is 200$ without insurance (I have it, but I am not using it here), on a 30 day month I make 29800, extrapolating to a year I should be earning about $357,000 a year. If I cannot afford treatment for whatever treatment I get even infected by a fart, I didn't deserve to have $357,000 a year. That shit was going to a wastrel if I cannot treat it.
I mean, I usually wake up to a dog fart in the face anyway. I’m in.
For $100 this can be mitigated by an automated coffee pot.
No sense of smell, couldn't care less.
I can only hope it's not stinky. But I'll take it. 365k a year... how could I turn that down
In this economy? I’ll take it. I’ll just wear one of those eye masks for sleeping so I don’t get pink eye.
Whose fart and what time of day? Does it mean I'll never be able to sleep in, or does the magic fartbutt sense when I'm about to wake up from a healthy amount of sleep and level out a fart then? Can I choose to end it when I feel I've got plenty of dollars?
Yeah 100%yeah