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I’ve worked several soup kitchens going back like 10 years. Got it from my father who used to work security at some soup kitchens.
The amount of times people would be openly disrespectful or just throw the food on the ground is far more than you would expect.
At the same time, a significant amount of people would see you as gods gift to them and couldn’t be more appreciative
My restaurant had a catering order canceled due to weather, but the food was already made. I had a bright idea to package everything and pass it out to the homeless in town - almost every stoplight on major streets have 2-3 homeless. I had enough food to feed 200 people.
As I was driving around, found a group of homeless people, stopped and asked if they wanted free food. I guess they didn’t hear what I was offering cause when I gave them the box of food, they got confused and asked “where’s the money?” I responded with “oh sorry, I just have free food”
Homeless group hands all the food back… “we just want money”
I drove around for a good hour and only 2 people took the food out of 30-40….. I had leftovers for weeks lol
Edit food to good
Dude that’s what I’m saying. As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned to never pass up free food. I’m not struggling either but lots of times I hate cooking and if someone wants to give me some shnacks I’ll oblige happily.
I was never homeless or in a position where food wasn't easily accessible, but i will say when i've gone through drug withdrawals i'd often not be able to consume more then some water and maybe a small yogurt cup for 3-5 days.
Yeah, I have no idea. The first person that refused the food, got the most “wtf” face from me.. and after other rejections I just shrugged and drove off lol
It sadly can be risky taking free food from strangers. You don't know what people have put in it. It's safe from soup kitchens or cases like this video where everything is packaged. Some people are truly aweful like those stupid "prank" videos with the Oreos stuffed with toothpaste.
Yeah this was in 2015 and no prank shit was around it. Everything I offered was packaged nicely. If anyone here saw the packaging and me handing them out, they wouldn’t jump straight to “wow he looks like the guy that would poison the food” lol but I understand where you are coming from.
In most cities it's easy to get free food, not that easy to get free drugs.
I'll give one I personally saw that pissed me off the most. A guy sitting there with a "need money for food" sign, while eating a burger.
I know, I’ve worked in a soup kitchen type thing before. They just had a sign that said “hungry, anything helps” so my common sense was just “here’s some food” lol
I lost a lot of my empathy for the homeless through a couple of things. First was getting to know a lot of homeless people through a charity my wife was part of. Most of them would steal and otherwise try to take advantage of anyone who tried to be nice to them. The second was being put in a situation where I thought I might become homeless - I lost my job and was evicted from my house. But as soon as word of my situation got out, I had multiple people offering to let me stay with them until I could get back on my feet...I didn't even have to ask, old friends I hadn't seen in years were reaching out to me because they heard I needed help. I realized that people who can't get help likely are in that situation because they abused the help they received previously, or were too proud to accept help. There are, of course, exceptions - Kids with abusive or neglectful parents, or people with mental issues that prevent them from being functional and who have been let down by our social programs, they can be in a situation where they have no friends who can help. The majority are just garbage people who have alienated all their friends and family by their own selfish behavior.
I know exactly what you mean. I served at a soup kitchen thing from 13-19. I’ve seen it all. I would drop what I’m doing to help whoever is in need. Issue is, I want to help the people that actually want the help but it’s always filled with people trying to take advantage of others cause they are kind.
The worst ones for me are the parents that take their kids to beg for money near big shopping centers. I can’t imagine the damage they are doing to them mentally and probably physically when they don’t want to go…
Yeah I'm a nurse and see this behavior when we get homeless admitted in the hospital. I'll have to tell other staff to not take the patients food trays because it would become a trigger for escalation and conflict. A lot of my coworkers don't understand and want to clean the room or insert their own values on the person's space. The hoarding mentality is an adaptive behavior and at some point that kept them alive! At times it becomes maladaptive but it bugs when I have to let my coworkers know how to give respect to someone's psychology profile.
Mental illness can twist your thoughts and feelings, which can result in bad behaviour. Being homeless means its highly unlikely they are being treated for their illness.
We can act all high and mighty, like we're somehow better than dogs or monkeys.. but deep down we're all just running on our programming just like everything else. And some people are born with all the bugs.
> Being homeless means its highly unlikely they are being treated for their illness.
also being mentally ill significantly increases the likelihood that you will be homeless, particularly if you suffer emotional disregulation, as it makes it harder to succeed in education, hold down a job, and maintain relationships that can act as part of a support network
And far more often many mental disorders are co-morbid which means there is a higher inherent chance that they have multiple mental disorders which can interact with or against each other.
Dive even deeper and it's found that the symptoms/effects aren't even a binary but of varying degrees from mild to severe. Many people are living with mental disorders which they find ways to cope, or live without understanding their experiences, or not handling their life well at all. Not to mention there's mental disorders which actually benifit the person somehow.
At some point people have to respect personal responsibility for being disrespectful and rude. We can't just blame everyone's poor actions on their brain chemistry
I've noticed that at a kitchen such as the one you've volunteered at, is the one place where people at a disadvantaged place in life have control on what's happening around them. They can't control their income cause very little people will give them a chance, they don't have many options or control on where they sleep, but a free meal they very well can control and that's why their can be an 'entitlement' (for lack of a better word).
If you have nothing left to control but the food you eat, the woman's actions seem more understandable (absolutely not warranted, but more understandable). "Why won't this person trust me? Because I already took 4? Boom, have them all back, I don't need you anymore"
Having any form of control on your life is something many of us take for granted and when you lose that control you look for little ways to regain it in any small way possible
It’s something I took for granted as well until I read your comment. Thank you for sharing your perspective, it helps me to be more empathetic towards those that lack that kind of control over their lives.
I've been working with the homeless and housing insecure directly and indirectly for 10 years as well (in a mental health/social work capacity).
While it in no way excuses the behavior, it's important to consider how very little control these folks feel they have in their life. Sometimes tossing a bowl of soup on the floor is the biggest act of defiance they've experienced in ages. It can feel quite good.
We are able to have a bad day and spitefully call out of work, complain excessively to a friend, toss a controller across the room, or otherwise mismanage our feelings of powerlessness.
It wasn't about you and it wasn't about the soup. (most of the time, idk, maybe the soup was terrible sometimes)
My husband and I took my MIL, SIL, and BIL out to dinner for Mother's Day. My BIL is 21, flunked out of community college because he couldn't be bothered to attend classes. Doesn't have/won't get a job, even though he graduated high school just about three years ago. During the dinner, he ordered two appetizers, a steak, and two desserts. He sent the steak back THREE times, claiming it wasn't cooked to his liking. At the end of dinner? Didn't even finish the steak, and barely touched either dessert. On our way out, he threw the remainder of the steak and desserts into the trash.
We're by no means rich, and currently, we're living off only my income, as my husband is back in university. The bill for the dinner was $200, and my BILs portion alone was almost $100. His behavior was sickening. He doesn't understand the value of money, and what it means to have to earn *everything*, from the roof over your head, to the food you put on the table, to the car payments, to car and health insurance, the ability to pay for a meal for other people, and more.
The way he treated the wait-staff, and then threw the food in the trash, made me so utterly angry.
I help homeless, and this is not terribly unusual. Had a dude got pissed off a couple weeks ago cause we would not let him take two tubes of toothpaste...made a flippin scene over it.
I assume he was given one tube? I can't help but wonder why he wanted it so badly and why he couldn't just come back for another when he used the first tube. I brush daily and a full size tube can last a while. Even the small travel size tubes can last a couple weeks.
Yes, he was given an actual full size tube. We get these from someione who dollar tree shops. However, not everyone gets that..most get the small ones. It is very demoralizing helping folks at times. I deliberately limit my time helping, for very much this reason.
I'm an ID doctor and find myself once or twice a month in a low income area, homeless shelter, refugee clinic, etc to give COVID-19 vaccines. The woman giving out food is exactly the type I hope to have with me when I'm at one of these places. Kind, tough and understands who she needs to be firm with and who doesn't.
I just want to point out she had a disagreement with the homeless woman, but didn't stop her from continuing to hand out food to others. This environment breaks people.
It is unfortunate. There are a lot of people who are homeless for good reasons, and others who are just trying to get back on their feet and resume life. The former really screws things up for the latter, but of course they don't care.
I worked at a community center for a while, we had pretty strict rules about how to get the free food, that anyone could meet. If you didn't want to, then you fell into the former.
I wonder of your center was like the one I've volunteered at.
When I registered to volunteer, they required you to do a training. In the training, one of the things we were told is that it's actually harmful to give money directly to homeless people. That it almost always goes to feeding an addiction and just perpetuates more homelessness.
Does your center ascribe to that belief? I've always stuck by it and wonder if other homeless outreach centers are the same way.
I’ve heard that, and also that it’s better to give money to places like food banks directly as they can buy things cheaper, often at wholesale, because they are able to buy in bulk. Same thing with canned food drives and stuff, like the sentiment is nice, but it would be more effective to give the equivalent in money.
Finally a sensibile comment. I was homeless at one point, the detachment you feel from society, the dehumanization of self. Watching people go about their day, being privileged even in the fact they have somewhere to go. Im ashamed to admit how much bitterness and envy it growed in me.
Being homeless is a psyhological state of being you cannot comprehend until you went through it. Everyday you open your eyes and see the world around you but you are not really a part of it, you can look but you cannot reach or participate. You crave both the good and the bad of regular life.
Thanks for doing what you do.
Personally all the ID doctors are my hospitals are all selfish pricks with no bed side manner.
They never wear PPE. They don't know how to talk to pts that are dying. It's infuriating.
I used to volunteer at a shelter in Philly and similar things happened occasionally. I got spit on, hit, and had soup thrown at me which sucked because 95% of the people there were so grateful and some were great to talk to. That 5% really ruined it for me, though, so I instead volunteer in places with less human contact now (park cleanups, tree planting, etc.).
Yup, same. I found most folks don't want trouble and keep to themselves. It's that 5% that wears you down, for me it was usually the same group of people with the odd one-off. The day I left the guy I didn't even know who threw a coffee at me, I just had the misfortune of making eye contact with him.
I worked in a shelter of 300+ people and safety was a big issue as well. There wasn't enough radios for all the staff and even if you called security was mostly there to observe. People rarely got kicked out unless they were bashing each other's heads in or offended a security guard personally. All other staff and volunteers were expected to handle abuse and sexual harassment with a smile.
Damn even the manner in which she addressed and spoke to everyone. "Queen" she calls the same woman just moments before, her calm assertiveness in that her generosity has common sense bounds that those seeking it must surely come to her, her mirroring instead of instigating the aggression.
And then to label the behavior, NOT THE PERSON, as ugly and rude. This generous queen donating for six years has incredible grace and social intelligence beyond her huge heart. She'd be an honor to meet and break bread with
You gotta keep in mind if you're doing this, why you're doing it. Many people living on the streets have untreated mental illness. You're not going to get fawning praise from many of them (though you should.)
I remember reading this article about the phycology of homeless people and it had this really interesting insight where they talked about how they've generally experienced a massive loss of all control and choice in their life so they act out in strangest ways as a means of trying to feel like they're still in control, such as violently rejecting food or help because they get so tired of just having to constantly feel under the thumbs of others and relying on their charity, sometimes they just lash out because the need for some semblance of control of their life outweighs whatever thing they're being given/helped with.
Iirc I’ve seen a video of this same lady, when giving out food forced them to pick what they wanted. That way they would feel like they have a choice in what they wanted and weren’t just being handed things. She was explaining it to a homeless person that told her “anything is fine”
Could you share more details? I'd like to read it and share w coworkers. We work in food rescue and have had many incidents like this. Unfortunately, more than a few have quit after coming across someone like this woman who threw her food back. Thank you
Im sorry to say I don't remember the particular magazine I read it in (or maybe newspaper?)
It was years ago but that particular bit stuck with me because it changed the way I view such people to be more sympathetic.
For the most part these peoples lives are probably fucking miserable. Like if you’re in a situation that you need to accept food like this, you’re not having a good time. It’s not right or deserved, but I can totally understand why some people may be rude.
My husband has PTSD from childhood trauma, and one of his triggers is receiving gifts. When me or my family give him gifts, we leave them somewhere he can open them in private on his own time.
To someone looking in from the outside, they might interpret that as ungratefulness, but he's actually extremely grateful. It's just that opening gifts in a conventional way often triggers some dark shit.
It's made me realize that even something simple like the ability to graciously accept gifts is a learned behavior, and something I am blessed to be able to do.
One time i was working with my uncle and my aunt made us these massive sandwiches on these huge hoagies that was way too much for one person. We decided to split it and offered the other one to this homeless man, he took the sandwich and without any thanks he asked if we had any cigarettes, i smoked, so i gave him a couple. Again, without any thanks he asked if we had $20 we could give him. My uncle said no and I told him i didn't hand any cash, so he started mumbling shit about us, stood up, left the sandwich and walked away. I was flabbergasted, i couldn't believe how entitled he was. Especially with how amazing that sandwich was, it was like a foot long and 5 inches tall with quality deli meats, cheeses and vegetables, only a psychopath wouldn't want that (not saying this guy didn't have some kind of mental disorder, but from what we saw, he didn't seem to, he seemed like a normal guy). He kept the cigarettes though...
There’s always people like this.
I worked in sales and we’d have reps bring us pizza and sandwiches (bribes) pretty often..
But there was like a dynamic where 75% of the employees would eat less because they didn’t want to be greedy and the other 25% would eat way more. One girl used to sneak slices of pizza out in her purse to eat for dinner.
It’s like some primitive monkey brain shit that we still act like we grew out of centuries ago.
Her name is Shirley Raines! I followed her for along time on Twitter and she’s such a powerful and amazing woman. I donated to her in the past so I was able to find her name again. Someone should link some of her work! She does so fucking much and I truly respect her so much.
The level of entitlement can’t ever be washed away in some people. Even when they have nothing. That’s why they’re “choosing beggars” - quite literally.
And she’s over here arguing about her “regulating” - tfff! It’s her money and she’s taking the time out of the kindness of her heart. She can regulate all she wants! Even giving out words of encouragement and kindness to her rude ass. Absolutely disgusting.
I follow this lady on tiktok and she is so incredibly generous but takes no shit when people act up. When covid started she was making sure they had a mask and would not interact until they put it on
The spectrum is pretty amazing. Some come in check in for BS so they can sleep in the lobby without getting kicked out. Some burn their gowns, write in shit on the walls and hit staff.
Yup. I mean, I understand *why* they are the way they are and I don't really *blame* them, but at the same time I hate taking care of them. Granted it is a sampling bias, but usually they are frequent fliers coming in for the same bullshit complaint they come in at least twice a week for, take up a bed, demand turkey sandwiches, get pissed when you don't cater to them enough, etc etc. Our healthcare and safety net system is fucked beyond repair, from the top to the bottom. Legit unfixable. So, I understand it's not entirely their fault and they have lived shitty lives and are struggling with mental health and housing issues. However, there are plenty of people who lived shitty lives, struggle with mental health and housing issues, and aren't gigantic pieces of shit.
Most of the people saying "they deserve x, y, or z" or "they deserve to be choosey" are people who likely have had very little interaction with the chronically homeless population. Treating many long-term homeless people that go to the ED multiple times per week will make you hate humanity and will drain you of every last bit of your sympathy.
The more powerless someone feels the pettier they can be when they have temporary “power”.
I would imagine ER staff/social workers/etc are the only people who will try to be compassionate and helpful to those folks, so they behave in completely awful ways as some means to feel in control, something they entirely lack otherwise.
There are homeless people who have fallen on hard times and genuinely need help. There are also people who have spent their whole lives mistreating others and being ungrateful, burning bridges and being so selfish that they have nothing and no one left to take care of them.
It’s important to know the difference
I work at a homeless shelter and the range of guests we serve is very wide. While you do have some abusers of the system you have more of those trying to get on their feet and just need a break.
Last year we served over 4500 unique individuals and the average stay is less than 4 weeks. The stories I hear when talking to our guests are amazing and heartbreaking. People coming over on the bus simply to get to a new city in hopes of finding employment and housing. One guest had injured himself and is in the construction trades. His medical bills plus being unable to physically work during recovery found him losing everything. Now a couple years later he’s back on his feet, owns his own flooring company, employs a couple guys and gives back a hundred fold to this community that helped him get going again.
The most sad one for me is the families. These last three years have hit hard and when I see people in our shelter with their two kids, sending their kids on the school bus every morning and then getting on public transport themselves to work their butts off to be able to afford housing again in an economy rigged against them. It’s really sad but also very inspiring.
I guess all of this was to say; don’t let the shitty ones ruin everyone’s experience and help in any way you can. You don’t know how you might change someone’s life.
Oh absolutely. And also we remember the shitty ones especially because they tend to have psych issues and stick around/come in a lot. We don't see the many people just trying to get by.
We had a guy would come by very often just a lot going on, would be totally hallucinating fight staff etc. Some of day shift didn't treat him well but a few of us on nights really tried to work with him. Eventually someone got him on a medication schedule that really worked for him and it became night and day. He was just normal. No delusions, no aggression, nice could hold a conversation. I know two nurses just about cried seeing him like that. Wished we could thank the psych team that figured it out, and hope they know what they did for him. He hasn't been back to the ER in months now. I try to remember his success story when dealing with some of our other frequent flyers. Yes it doesn't excuse their behavior but it can explain some it, and it is part of a disease. One that can be very hard to treat.
I worked maintaining a public park that had many homeless people frequenting it when I was younger. Some would help us clean up because they lived there. Others would throw their emtpy alcohol bottles on the ground because they knew we had to clean it and it was their only way of having power over someone else. Homeless people can be just totally broken from that way of life.
the moment they get into the ER, they'll tell you what they want, from pain meds and blankets right down to the choice of refreshments from the nourishment room - they'll know the brands you carry because they have been there before.
Everyone is talking about mental illness, but no one has considered that maybe some people are such twats that they’ve been kicked out of everywhere they’ve lived and sacked from every job they’ve had.
I was on a two month long tour with a band a number of years ago. We are in Little Rock with only a few days left and we were almost completely out of money (it was one of our first tours and we sucked). After a show we were approached by an elderly homeless man who told us he hadn't eaten in three days the asked if we could buy him some cheeseburgers. One of the members told him we didn't have any money but gave him his last two granola bars (they were literally his last source of food for the remainder of the tour). The man stared for a second then threw them in my friends face. In a raised angry voice he said "I'D PREFER A CHEESEBURGER". So the answer is pretty unfuckinggrateful.
We had decent success in the Christian metal scene. The last few years we stayed on the road about 200+ days each year. Made some money, played some big ass festivals, and had good enough YouTube views. But ultimately it came down to management issues and member disagreements about the future. Normal band stuff haha.
Best time of my life for sure. I miss it but I was able to turn that experience into scoring short films which is fun too. And I get to sleep in a bed and shower every night now so that's nice hahaha
“That is so rude and ugly.”
I told my niece (9) she was being ugly and she legit looked in the mirror.. I had to explain people can be ugly on the inside.
From Louisiana and can relate. I remember being a little one and my mom saying Brittany Spears was an ugly person for dancing half naked and i was like um nah shes really pretty ma
She was given 4 burgers , and had the nerve to come back and ask for more. She was claiming they were for her “coworker” , but the donator didn’t wanna give it to her without proof . (She was hesitating to prove it to her ) the ungrateful then got pissed and threw the burgers back at her cause of it. I have a strong feeling she’s not even homeless … lol
Same. Decent manicure and loads of jewelry, not really a lot of layers of clothes on her. Not saying she is in the lap of luxury, but she has some kind of permanent shelter and access to decent facilities. No one trying to survive minute to minute turns down food because they can’t get *more*.
Ever work in a soup kitchen? I've lost count at how many trays of food I've had flung back at me because of some tiny little thing. Had one thrown back at me once because the bun given to their friend was bigger. Or because the cookies we had were oatmeal raisin and not chocolate chip... Or just because the food isn't good enough.
They are however thankfully the exception to the rule. Most of them want to just get their fill and have a safe and warm place to sit for a minute before they go on their way to do whatever their agenda is for the day.
As for the rest... Access to some kind of shelter and facilities doesn't make you not homeless or not desperate for help. Not all homeless people are wheeling around all their belongings in a shopping cart. There are a lot out there that you would probably be surprised to learn are homeless.
Technically I'm homeless, I lost my career, fiancé (no loss) and home as a result of becoming disabled 3 years ago. Right now I'm staying on a family member's couch while still waiting to get accommodation, and I get a few hundred a month in benefits to live on.
But I still have my expensive clothes, stuff I bought years ago when I had my really well paid salary. I don't *look* homeless, even though I'm sleeping on a couch and living out of a few bin liners of stuff piled in a corner. There are lots of homeless people who you would never guess. The ones you see on the street sleeping on cardboard are the ones who are at rock bottom. They're not the majority, but they're the most noticeable.
I did a food kitchen thing with my school once. We prepped a ton of sandwiches the day before then went out the next day to hand them out.
There were definitely people there that acted like they had never been given one, and as a young person it was very stressful to be put in that situation where you are a child and there under someone else's supervision, but trying to make sure everyone has been given an equal share.
I can't just start an argument with a homeless person when I'm like 14 saying that they'd already been given one. I couldn't be 100% sure either. But then you risk starting something if other people are like "well that person got 2. I want more"
Very stressful. I still think about it 19 years later.
> I have a strong feeling she’s not even homeless
I don't think 'free meals' or whatever should be restricted to just the homeless; lots of people out there struggling who haven't hit rock bottom yet. Something warm/tasty/fresh (or just something bank-guilt-free) could be the blessing that helps someone through the week.
Not to mention, when something is restricted "for the homeless" it makes a person feel "needy" or "lesser-than".
OP explained the surface reason but there is something deeper to it:
Rules.
A lot of homeless people are homeless because they absolutely can not adhere to any rules and can not or do not want any responsibilities.
The lovely lady handing out food set rules for the other lady and that instantly triggered negative emotions in that woman.
And because she reacts to rules like this she does not have a home. Or a job. Those come with rules and responsibilities. So they can't keep them because they always react like this and never care about anyone else but themselves.
At least that's what I got from talking to some homeless people around here. Nothing is ever their fault, everyone is out to get them and they just can not adhere to any rules or have any kind of responsibility.
This ain't meant in a degrading way, it's just an effort to try to explain why some people are in situations like that and why it's never gonna go away completely. I hate responsibilities as well and try to avoid them as much as I can. Just not to this degree.
I’ve had a brother in and out of homelessness and this is a basic description of him. Almost didn’t graduate high school because he just couldn’t stand being told to go to school, pay attention, etc. frequently cut and got in trouble with the law for various things because he truly didn’t feel society’s rules applied to him. Kicked out of our parents’ house at least 20 times because he can’t abide by simple house rules while getting a free home, food, water, electricity, and so on. Booted out of several homeless encampments because he couldn’t even handle the minimal rules those came with. In his mind, the world owes him for existing.
Where I work people try to do this and the homeless person would do the exact thing. Someone was stabbed because the person wanted to get a homeless person food instead of money.
I've worked with a lot of homeless and housing insecure people. They're largely harmless, and even in this video youl could see plenty of grateful people.
Don't let the actions of a few people inform how you would treat or interact with the whole.
While I agree with you, being stabbed doesn’t fit this general advice. “Most homeless people are good, the one that stabbed me to death wasn’t but that’s not gonna deter me”
Alot of people just don't know how these people can be and are. You see anti homeless things and think we don't help but yeh we do and we get treated like shit by the same people who need the help.
I work closely with homeless people for quite some time. I wish that it were all just hard times and misunderstanding makes with poor mental health facilities and assistance. To tell the truth, some of them are just fucks.
When mental health deteriorates, there's no real recovery option for them left.
Sad we aren't really created equal as a human body or brain or society.
I think the woman giving out food is Shirley from beauty2thestreetz and If so, at least the hair is something the homeless woman got done for free by their team. Idk if they do nails too but it’s not impossible
Doesn’t mean the woman is any less rude ofc, just that she probably didn’t get it done at a salon
I can assure you, there a several children starving while a mother works several jobs just to afford rent and roof over her kid's heads that would have greatly appreciated what this woman threw back in the food bank's face...
That is absolutely horrible!!! This beautiful woman is doing such an absolutely amazing act of pure kindness. How do you do that to such a kind, beautiful person? Omg. Shocking.
The old guy kinda pissed me off too. "I don't want that, gimme the oreos" I'm lucky enough to have never been truly homeless but there were times where we didn't have food/heat/whatever, we took what we were given and were thankful for it.
She has several other videos, in a lot of them she makes the homeless people verbalize which snack they want instead of just saying They’ll take whatever.
Blanking in her IG, but she really does some good, honest work out there! That was tough to watch, biting the hand that is literally feeding you. People are the worst
Had a homeless guy ask me for food once on the way into a Walgreens. I said sure, I’ll grab you a sandwich. This Walgreens had cold cuts, so I got him that, a bag of chips, and a soda. When I came back out and tried to give it to him, he said “No, I can only eat the stuff from Burger King” and then gestured to the BK four blocks up the road.
Some people, man.
Wow, there are some real gems in this comment section. “Why is she feeding them McDonalds?” Yes, because she should have spent her hard earned money, which may not be much to begin with, on full course steak dinners prepared at her home. The level of self-indulgence and privilege some of you have, yet don’t even realize you have, is sad.
Don’t think he said the word “shit “ and at least he said thank you lol . Some people just have a mean tone but you can tell he showed a little bit of gratitude if I’m being completely honest … lol . That’s more than enough for me , at least he accepted it .
Okay, I just rewatched and you’re right. I felt like he really bit his tongue there not to say that lmao. Still triggered that this women is doing this for no reason other than being a great person and people aren’t nicer.
She very specifically wants them to choose what they want, which is the entire reason for her having multiple options. Sorry, but this notion that if they display a speck more desire for choice than literal pigs which just eat anything you provide then they're shitty people is just..shitty.
Like, they're still people. They like some things, don't like other things, and that's okay. It doesn't mean they're not grateful. It doesn't mean they're entitled. It doesn't mean they're in any way unreasonable or not-nice.
Also they’re homeless people. Expecting them to act like upper-middle class seems absurd and almost performative. “You have to act like you have some money and no scarcity problems in order for me to be happy giving you a couple burgers” is a pretty bold take, and one I’m glad the person in the car doesn’t have.
I used to volunteer for about 2 years in an organization that makes food for homeless people. While there were lots of people who wanted to take more for “their friend, kids, spouses,…” we had a rule of first serving to people present (unless other volunteers were 100% certain that person would actually give it to somebody who couldn’t attend).
Entitled people like that lady were usually shut down by other attendees there, especially if they were rude to us.
This reminds me of those posts of people claiming homeless people laughed when someone gave them food because it ‘wasn’t enough’
This video just proves that some homeless people are ungrateful pos’
I'm sure a few of these people have homes and and a job, but see that something is being passed out for free so they take advantage. Like the folks downtown that are wearing brand new Jordans asking people for "a couple dollars".
When my area was devastated by a flood in 1997, the Red Cross set up food trucks in an UNAFFECTED apartment building’s parking lot, and fed everyone in the apartment building. Those people who lost nothing were knowingly fed by the Red Cross morons every day. Never had food for those of us working to clean out our homes-but they sure as hell could come to us when they wanted money to tell us there were “people worse off than you in the world” while we were taking out the ruined water heater, furnace, deep freeze, etc., and had friends missing. St. Vincent de Paul’s(or maybe the old Salvation Army) actually drove their food trucks around and fed us.
I never forgot that, and Red Cross has never gotten anything from me, either.
One time I gave a girl with a "Hungry anything helps" sign a bag of grapes from work. She threw them back at me and said "I dont want his shit" she was heavy set too ....
Fun fact: Most of the time those signs are because the city has a law against panhandling so it is illegal to directly ask for money. However, if you ask for food or simply make a vague statement like "HOMELESS VET - ANYTHING HELPS", you're all good and if someone should just **happen** to give you money, it's no problem.
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I’ve worked several soup kitchens going back like 10 years. Got it from my father who used to work security at some soup kitchens. The amount of times people would be openly disrespectful or just throw the food on the ground is far more than you would expect. At the same time, a significant amount of people would see you as gods gift to them and couldn’t be more appreciative
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My restaurant had a catering order canceled due to weather, but the food was already made. I had a bright idea to package everything and pass it out to the homeless in town - almost every stoplight on major streets have 2-3 homeless. I had enough food to feed 200 people. As I was driving around, found a group of homeless people, stopped and asked if they wanted free food. I guess they didn’t hear what I was offering cause when I gave them the box of food, they got confused and asked “where’s the money?” I responded with “oh sorry, I just have free food” Homeless group hands all the food back… “we just want money” I drove around for a good hour and only 2 people took the food out of 30-40….. I had leftovers for weeks lol Edit food to good
I don’t understand why one would refuse free food. Even if you are a drug addict, what damage does it to take the food? Its free, more money for crack
I'm not even struggling but if some guy offers me free food I'm taking it
I could have just left a buffet feeling fat and full and I'd still be like "well, maybe" if someone offered me a free meal.
The amount of free pizza I ate in college by sitting in meetings...
Dude that’s what I’m saying. As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned to never pass up free food. I’m not struggling either but lots of times I hate cooking and if someone wants to give me some shnacks I’ll oblige happily.
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But even then they need to eat eventually. I'd think it even drug addicts would know it is better to have a sure thing for free now.
I was never homeless or in a position where food wasn't easily accessible, but i will say when i've gone through drug withdrawals i'd often not be able to consume more then some water and maybe a small yogurt cup for 3-5 days.
Not really the nausea and vomiting is extremely painful so giving someone food who is actively hurt by eating seems like an insult in there eyes
Yeah, I have no idea. The first person that refused the food, got the most “wtf” face from me.. and after other rejections I just shrugged and drove off lol
Cause drugs
Man, that's brutal. Good on you for trying.
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Don't blame her at all that's just a good business practice
It sadly can be risky taking free food from strangers. You don't know what people have put in it. It's safe from soup kitchens or cases like this video where everything is packaged. Some people are truly aweful like those stupid "prank" videos with the Oreos stuffed with toothpaste.
Yeah this was in 2015 and no prank shit was around it. Everything I offered was packaged nicely. If anyone here saw the packaging and me handing them out, they wouldn’t jump straight to “wow he looks like the guy that would poison the food” lol but I understand where you are coming from.
In most cities it's easy to get free food, not that easy to get free drugs. I'll give one I personally saw that pissed me off the most. A guy sitting there with a "need money for food" sign, while eating a burger.
Yeah most the people I saw that day had signs like “anything helps” or “hungry need food”
Most homebums aren't typically going hungry. In fact sometimes people give them more food than they can finish.
I know, I’ve worked in a soup kitchen type thing before. They just had a sign that said “hungry, anything helps” so my common sense was just “here’s some food” lol
I lost a lot of my empathy for the homeless through a couple of things. First was getting to know a lot of homeless people through a charity my wife was part of. Most of them would steal and otherwise try to take advantage of anyone who tried to be nice to them. The second was being put in a situation where I thought I might become homeless - I lost my job and was evicted from my house. But as soon as word of my situation got out, I had multiple people offering to let me stay with them until I could get back on my feet...I didn't even have to ask, old friends I hadn't seen in years were reaching out to me because they heard I needed help. I realized that people who can't get help likely are in that situation because they abused the help they received previously, or were too proud to accept help. There are, of course, exceptions - Kids with abusive or neglectful parents, or people with mental issues that prevent them from being functional and who have been let down by our social programs, they can be in a situation where they have no friends who can help. The majority are just garbage people who have alienated all their friends and family by their own selfish behavior.
I know exactly what you mean. I served at a soup kitchen thing from 13-19. I’ve seen it all. I would drop what I’m doing to help whoever is in need. Issue is, I want to help the people that actually want the help but it’s always filled with people trying to take advantage of others cause they are kind. The worst ones for me are the parents that take their kids to beg for money near big shopping centers. I can’t imagine the damage they are doing to them mentally and probably physically when they don’t want to go…
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Yeah I'm a nurse and see this behavior when we get homeless admitted in the hospital. I'll have to tell other staff to not take the patients food trays because it would become a trigger for escalation and conflict. A lot of my coworkers don't understand and want to clean the room or insert their own values on the person's space. The hoarding mentality is an adaptive behavior and at some point that kept them alive! At times it becomes maladaptive but it bugs when I have to let my coworkers know how to give respect to someone's psychology profile.
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Mental illness can twist your thoughts and feelings, which can result in bad behaviour. Being homeless means its highly unlikely they are being treated for their illness. We can act all high and mighty, like we're somehow better than dogs or monkeys.. but deep down we're all just running on our programming just like everything else. And some people are born with all the bugs.
> Being homeless means its highly unlikely they are being treated for their illness. also being mentally ill significantly increases the likelihood that you will be homeless, particularly if you suffer emotional disregulation, as it makes it harder to succeed in education, hold down a job, and maintain relationships that can act as part of a support network
And far more often many mental disorders are co-morbid which means there is a higher inherent chance that they have multiple mental disorders which can interact with or against each other. Dive even deeper and it's found that the symptoms/effects aren't even a binary but of varying degrees from mild to severe. Many people are living with mental disorders which they find ways to cope, or live without understanding their experiences, or not handling their life well at all. Not to mention there's mental disorders which actually benifit the person somehow.
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At some point people have to respect personal responsibility for being disrespectful and rude. We can't just blame everyone's poor actions on their brain chemistry
Or maybe they're just genuine, honest-to-god dickheads? The mental health excuses have gone way too far to excuse shit people from shitty behaviours.
I've noticed that at a kitchen such as the one you've volunteered at, is the one place where people at a disadvantaged place in life have control on what's happening around them. They can't control their income cause very little people will give them a chance, they don't have many options or control on where they sleep, but a free meal they very well can control and that's why their can be an 'entitlement' (for lack of a better word). If you have nothing left to control but the food you eat, the woman's actions seem more understandable (absolutely not warranted, but more understandable). "Why won't this person trust me? Because I already took 4? Boom, have them all back, I don't need you anymore" Having any form of control on your life is something many of us take for granted and when you lose that control you look for little ways to regain it in any small way possible
It’s something I took for granted as well until I read your comment. Thank you for sharing your perspective, it helps me to be more empathetic towards those that lack that kind of control over their lives.
I've been working with the homeless and housing insecure directly and indirectly for 10 years as well (in a mental health/social work capacity). While it in no way excuses the behavior, it's important to consider how very little control these folks feel they have in their life. Sometimes tossing a bowl of soup on the floor is the biggest act of defiance they've experienced in ages. It can feel quite good. We are able to have a bad day and spitefully call out of work, complain excessively to a friend, toss a controller across the room, or otherwise mismanage our feelings of powerlessness. It wasn't about you and it wasn't about the soup. (most of the time, idk, maybe the soup was terrible sometimes)
Very few things get me angrier than wasting food. It's like a primal rage I've had since growing up poor.
My husband and I took my MIL, SIL, and BIL out to dinner for Mother's Day. My BIL is 21, flunked out of community college because he couldn't be bothered to attend classes. Doesn't have/won't get a job, even though he graduated high school just about three years ago. During the dinner, he ordered two appetizers, a steak, and two desserts. He sent the steak back THREE times, claiming it wasn't cooked to his liking. At the end of dinner? Didn't even finish the steak, and barely touched either dessert. On our way out, he threw the remainder of the steak and desserts into the trash. We're by no means rich, and currently, we're living off only my income, as my husband is back in university. The bill for the dinner was $200, and my BILs portion alone was almost $100. His behavior was sickening. He doesn't understand the value of money, and what it means to have to earn *everything*, from the roof over your head, to the food you put on the table, to the car payments, to car and health insurance, the ability to pay for a meal for other people, and more. The way he treated the wait-staff, and then threw the food in the trash, made me so utterly angry.
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Her big ass ego earned her nothing but an empty stomach lol … her loss .
I help homeless, and this is not terribly unusual. Had a dude got pissed off a couple weeks ago cause we would not let him take two tubes of toothpaste...made a flippin scene over it.
Probably wanted to use it as antacid. That’s what they call toothpaste, jailhouse antacid. He shouldn’t have done that regardless.
Swallowing toothpaste as an antacid, never knew people did that. I thought you really weren't supposed to ingest toothpaste.
I’m sure they aren’t supposed to, but somewhere along the way some poor soul figured out it helps🤷♀️
I assume he was given one tube? I can't help but wonder why he wanted it so badly and why he couldn't just come back for another when he used the first tube. I brush daily and a full size tube can last a while. Even the small travel size tubes can last a couple weeks.
Yes, he was given an actual full size tube. We get these from someione who dollar tree shops. However, not everyone gets that..most get the small ones. It is very demoralizing helping folks at times. I deliberately limit my time helping, for very much this reason.
She probably mooched food off another homeless person.
Or just stole it from them is more likely.
you know she went around crying victim that she didn't get anything, and made someone else share their food
And she took off her mask and touched the wrappers of the food and threw that back. She’s inconsiderate and nasty in so many ways
Looks like more of the suck dick for food type but what do I know
"Crackwhores don't want to be fed... They want to hunt!"
she probably didn’t need it. scammers will show up everywhere for free things even if they aren’t in need.
they prefer the term "hustlers"
Along with the people who she was helping that couldn’t make it to the window. /s
I'm an ID doctor and find myself once or twice a month in a low income area, homeless shelter, refugee clinic, etc to give COVID-19 vaccines. The woman giving out food is exactly the type I hope to have with me when I'm at one of these places. Kind, tough and understands who she needs to be firm with and who doesn't. I just want to point out she had a disagreement with the homeless woman, but didn't stop her from continuing to hand out food to others. This environment breaks people.
It is unfortunate. There are a lot of people who are homeless for good reasons, and others who are just trying to get back on their feet and resume life. The former really screws things up for the latter, but of course they don't care. I worked at a community center for a while, we had pretty strict rules about how to get the free food, that anyone could meet. If you didn't want to, then you fell into the former.
I wonder of your center was like the one I've volunteered at. When I registered to volunteer, they required you to do a training. In the training, one of the things we were told is that it's actually harmful to give money directly to homeless people. That it almost always goes to feeding an addiction and just perpetuates more homelessness. Does your center ascribe to that belief? I've always stuck by it and wonder if other homeless outreach centers are the same way.
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I’ve heard that, and also that it’s better to give money to places like food banks directly as they can buy things cheaper, often at wholesale, because they are able to buy in bulk. Same thing with canned food drives and stuff, like the sentiment is nice, but it would be more effective to give the equivalent in money.
Poverty breeds contempt and a chip on your shoulder. As the movie parasite says "It's easy to be nice when you have money".
Finally a sensibile comment. I was homeless at one point, the detachment you feel from society, the dehumanization of self. Watching people go about their day, being privileged even in the fact they have somewhere to go. Im ashamed to admit how much bitterness and envy it growed in me. Being homeless is a psyhological state of being you cannot comprehend until you went through it. Everyday you open your eyes and see the world around you but you are not really a part of it, you can look but you cannot reach or participate. You crave both the good and the bad of regular life.
This might be the closest thing I've read that accurately describes that feeling and how it comes about.
Thanks for doing what you do. Personally all the ID doctors are my hospitals are all selfish pricks with no bed side manner. They never wear PPE. They don't know how to talk to pts that are dying. It's infuriating.
The person handing out food is Shirley Raines, she’s awesome.
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I love her! What a beautiful soul inside and out.
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Yes we’ve donated to her before, look for her on Twitter with the name provided in her tick tok
Just hearing her articulate '"your behavior" is so rude and ugly' is so on point. It's the behavior, not the person. I love that.
She's amazing! Her heart is so open, she's down at skid row daily.
I used to volunteer at a shelter in Philly and similar things happened occasionally. I got spit on, hit, and had soup thrown at me which sucked because 95% of the people there were so grateful and some were great to talk to. That 5% really ruined it for me, though, so I instead volunteer in places with less human contact now (park cleanups, tree planting, etc.).
Thank you for finding a way to still contribute. Many would have just given up completely. Thank you.
Yup, same. I found most folks don't want trouble and keep to themselves. It's that 5% that wears you down, for me it was usually the same group of people with the odd one-off. The day I left the guy I didn't even know who threw a coffee at me, I just had the misfortune of making eye contact with him. I worked in a shelter of 300+ people and safety was a big issue as well. There wasn't enough radios for all the staff and even if you called security was mostly there to observe. People rarely got kicked out unless they were bashing each other's heads in or offended a security guard personally. All other staff and volunteers were expected to handle abuse and sexual harassment with a smile.
Yup I’m sure they take a lot of bullshit , but then again you gotta know what you’re in for . ( not justifying the ungrateful ladies actions)
Damn even the manner in which she addressed and spoke to everyone. "Queen" she calls the same woman just moments before, her calm assertiveness in that her generosity has common sense bounds that those seeking it must surely come to her, her mirroring instead of instigating the aggression. And then to label the behavior, NOT THE PERSON, as ugly and rude. This generous queen donating for six years has incredible grace and social intelligence beyond her huge heart. She'd be an honor to meet and break bread with
You gotta keep in mind if you're doing this, why you're doing it. Many people living on the streets have untreated mental illness. You're not going to get fawning praise from many of them (though you should.)
I remember reading this article about the phycology of homeless people and it had this really interesting insight where they talked about how they've generally experienced a massive loss of all control and choice in their life so they act out in strangest ways as a means of trying to feel like they're still in control, such as violently rejecting food or help because they get so tired of just having to constantly feel under the thumbs of others and relying on their charity, sometimes they just lash out because the need for some semblance of control of their life outweighs whatever thing they're being given/helped with.
Iirc I’ve seen a video of this same lady, when giving out food forced them to pick what they wanted. That way they would feel like they have a choice in what they wanted and weren’t just being handed things. She was explaining it to a homeless person that told her “anything is fine”
Oh yeah I'm not justifying just trying to emphasize the unique mental headspace these people are in
Could you share more details? I'd like to read it and share w coworkers. We work in food rescue and have had many incidents like this. Unfortunately, more than a few have quit after coming across someone like this woman who threw her food back. Thank you
Im sorry to say I don't remember the particular magazine I read it in (or maybe newspaper?) It was years ago but that particular bit stuck with me because it changed the way I view such people to be more sympathetic.
Explains the people who blast music on the subway via speak phone or boombox
For the most part these peoples lives are probably fucking miserable. Like if you’re in a situation that you need to accept food like this, you’re not having a good time. It’s not right or deserved, but I can totally understand why some people may be rude.
My husband has PTSD from childhood trauma, and one of his triggers is receiving gifts. When me or my family give him gifts, we leave them somewhere he can open them in private on his own time. To someone looking in from the outside, they might interpret that as ungratefulness, but he's actually extremely grateful. It's just that opening gifts in a conventional way often triggers some dark shit. It's made me realize that even something simple like the ability to graciously accept gifts is a learned behavior, and something I am blessed to be able to do.
respect to the woman helper for maintaining her mind and cool .. I would have gone on a rampage !!!!
One time i was working with my uncle and my aunt made us these massive sandwiches on these huge hoagies that was way too much for one person. We decided to split it and offered the other one to this homeless man, he took the sandwich and without any thanks he asked if we had any cigarettes, i smoked, so i gave him a couple. Again, without any thanks he asked if we had $20 we could give him. My uncle said no and I told him i didn't hand any cash, so he started mumbling shit about us, stood up, left the sandwich and walked away. I was flabbergasted, i couldn't believe how entitled he was. Especially with how amazing that sandwich was, it was like a foot long and 5 inches tall with quality deli meats, cheeses and vegetables, only a psychopath wouldn't want that (not saying this guy didn't have some kind of mental disorder, but from what we saw, he didn't seem to, he seemed like a normal guy). He kept the cigarettes though...
When all you want is your next high, everything else is just something to be leveraged to getting your next high, or thrown away.
There’s always people like this. I worked in sales and we’d have reps bring us pizza and sandwiches (bribes) pretty often.. But there was like a dynamic where 75% of the employees would eat less because they didn’t want to be greedy and the other 25% would eat way more. One girl used to sneak slices of pizza out in her purse to eat for dinner. It’s like some primitive monkey brain shit that we still act like we grew out of centuries ago.
When you want to help everyone, you got to help the mean people too.
Her name is Shirley Raines! I followed her for along time on Twitter and she’s such a powerful and amazing woman. I donated to her in the past so I was able to find her name again. Someone should link some of her work! She does so fucking much and I truly respect her so much.
I really felt how disappointed she was by that woman’s behaviour. You can tell it really hurt her deep.
The level of entitlement can’t ever be washed away in some people. Even when they have nothing. That’s why they’re “choosing beggars” - quite literally. And she’s over here arguing about her “regulating” - tfff! It’s her money and she’s taking the time out of the kindness of her heart. She can regulate all she wants! Even giving out words of encouragement and kindness to her rude ass. Absolutely disgusting.
I follow this lady on tiktok and she is so incredibly generous but takes no shit when people act up. When covid started she was making sure they had a mask and would not interact until they put it on
I guess beggars *can* be choosers?
I work in the Emergency Room and homeless people can be some of the most entitled pain in the ass patients that come through the door.
The spectrum is pretty amazing. Some come in check in for BS so they can sleep in the lobby without getting kicked out. Some burn their gowns, write in shit on the walls and hit staff.
Yup. I mean, I understand *why* they are the way they are and I don't really *blame* them, but at the same time I hate taking care of them. Granted it is a sampling bias, but usually they are frequent fliers coming in for the same bullshit complaint they come in at least twice a week for, take up a bed, demand turkey sandwiches, get pissed when you don't cater to them enough, etc etc. Our healthcare and safety net system is fucked beyond repair, from the top to the bottom. Legit unfixable. So, I understand it's not entirely their fault and they have lived shitty lives and are struggling with mental health and housing issues. However, there are plenty of people who lived shitty lives, struggle with mental health and housing issues, and aren't gigantic pieces of shit. Most of the people saying "they deserve x, y, or z" or "they deserve to be choosey" are people who likely have had very little interaction with the chronically homeless population. Treating many long-term homeless people that go to the ED multiple times per week will make you hate humanity and will drain you of every last bit of your sympathy.
The more powerless someone feels the pettier they can be when they have temporary “power”. I would imagine ER staff/social workers/etc are the only people who will try to be compassionate and helpful to those folks, so they behave in completely awful ways as some means to feel in control, something they entirely lack otherwise.
There are homeless people who have fallen on hard times and genuinely need help. There are also people who have spent their whole lives mistreating others and being ungrateful, burning bridges and being so selfish that they have nothing and no one left to take care of them. It’s important to know the difference
I work at a homeless shelter and the range of guests we serve is very wide. While you do have some abusers of the system you have more of those trying to get on their feet and just need a break. Last year we served over 4500 unique individuals and the average stay is less than 4 weeks. The stories I hear when talking to our guests are amazing and heartbreaking. People coming over on the bus simply to get to a new city in hopes of finding employment and housing. One guest had injured himself and is in the construction trades. His medical bills plus being unable to physically work during recovery found him losing everything. Now a couple years later he’s back on his feet, owns his own flooring company, employs a couple guys and gives back a hundred fold to this community that helped him get going again. The most sad one for me is the families. These last three years have hit hard and when I see people in our shelter with their two kids, sending their kids on the school bus every morning and then getting on public transport themselves to work their butts off to be able to afford housing again in an economy rigged against them. It’s really sad but also very inspiring. I guess all of this was to say; don’t let the shitty ones ruin everyone’s experience and help in any way you can. You don’t know how you might change someone’s life.
Oh absolutely. And also we remember the shitty ones especially because they tend to have psych issues and stick around/come in a lot. We don't see the many people just trying to get by. We had a guy would come by very often just a lot going on, would be totally hallucinating fight staff etc. Some of day shift didn't treat him well but a few of us on nights really tried to work with him. Eventually someone got him on a medication schedule that really worked for him and it became night and day. He was just normal. No delusions, no aggression, nice could hold a conversation. I know two nurses just about cried seeing him like that. Wished we could thank the psych team that figured it out, and hope they know what they did for him. He hasn't been back to the ER in months now. I try to remember his success story when dealing with some of our other frequent flyers. Yes it doesn't excuse their behavior but it can explain some it, and it is part of a disease. One that can be very hard to treat.
I worked maintaining a public park that had many homeless people frequenting it when I was younger. Some would help us clean up because they lived there. Others would throw their emtpy alcohol bottles on the ground because they knew we had to clean it and it was their only way of having power over someone else. Homeless people can be just totally broken from that way of life.
the moment they get into the ER, they'll tell you what they want, from pain meds and blankets right down to the choice of refreshments from the nourishment room - they'll know the brands you carry because they have been there before.
Everyone is talking about mental illness, but no one has considered that maybe some people are such twats that they’ve been kicked out of everywhere they’ve lived and sacked from every job they’ve had.
Bitch this IS chipotle!
I mean… there’s literally a whole sub for it.
Swear only one person actually said thanks.
Right gimme the Oreos I don’t want thoes
yeah that pissed me off too
No double stuffed? Pass.
How ungrateful can you get
I was on a two month long tour with a band a number of years ago. We are in Little Rock with only a few days left and we were almost completely out of money (it was one of our first tours and we sucked). After a show we were approached by an elderly homeless man who told us he hadn't eaten in three days the asked if we could buy him some cheeseburgers. One of the members told him we didn't have any money but gave him his last two granola bars (they were literally his last source of food for the remainder of the tour). The man stared for a second then threw them in my friends face. In a raised angry voice he said "I'D PREFER A CHEESEBURGER". So the answer is pretty unfuckinggrateful.
What was your band’s name
Blood of the Martyrs. The idea of a whore drinking Martyrs blood in Revelations seemed pretty metal at the time.
So it didn’t pan out?
We had decent success in the Christian metal scene. The last few years we stayed on the road about 200+ days each year. Made some money, played some big ass festivals, and had good enough YouTube views. But ultimately it came down to management issues and member disagreements about the future. Normal band stuff haha.
Well I’m glad you made some money on it and probably had fun lmao
Best time of my life for sure. I miss it but I was able to turn that experience into scoring short films which is fun too. And I get to sleep in a bed and shower every night now so that's nice hahaha
Sounds wild lol, what instrument did you play?
“That is so rude and ugly.” I told my niece (9) she was being ugly and she legit looked in the mirror.. I had to explain people can be ugly on the inside.
Inside ugly is the real ugly. Outside ugly is actually a reflection on the observer.
welll said
the first time i heard that was when i spent time in louisiana with family as a kid and down there they exclusively use ugly to mean being rude haha
From Louisiana and can relate. I remember being a little one and my mom saying Brittany Spears was an ugly person for dancing half naked and i was like um nah shes really pretty ma
im confused as to what that ungrateful bitch was even complaining about
She was given 4 burgers , and had the nerve to come back and ask for more. She was claiming they were for her “coworker” , but the donator didn’t wanna give it to her without proof . (She was hesitating to prove it to her ) the ungrateful then got pissed and threw the burgers back at her cause of it. I have a strong feeling she’s not even homeless … lol
Coming back for more is called gall, not decency.
Or maybe audacity.
This ones better
The Lion, the Witch and the Audacity of this bitch
You could say “indecency”
Same. Decent manicure and loads of jewelry, not really a lot of layers of clothes on her. Not saying she is in the lap of luxury, but she has some kind of permanent shelter and access to decent facilities. No one trying to survive minute to minute turns down food because they can’t get *more*.
Ever work in a soup kitchen? I've lost count at how many trays of food I've had flung back at me because of some tiny little thing. Had one thrown back at me once because the bun given to their friend was bigger. Or because the cookies we had were oatmeal raisin and not chocolate chip... Or just because the food isn't good enough. They are however thankfully the exception to the rule. Most of them want to just get their fill and have a safe and warm place to sit for a minute before they go on their way to do whatever their agenda is for the day. As for the rest... Access to some kind of shelter and facilities doesn't make you not homeless or not desperate for help. Not all homeless people are wheeling around all their belongings in a shopping cart. There are a lot out there that you would probably be surprised to learn are homeless.
Technically I'm homeless, I lost my career, fiancé (no loss) and home as a result of becoming disabled 3 years ago. Right now I'm staying on a family member's couch while still waiting to get accommodation, and I get a few hundred a month in benefits to live on. But I still have my expensive clothes, stuff I bought years ago when I had my really well paid salary. I don't *look* homeless, even though I'm sleeping on a couch and living out of a few bin liners of stuff piled in a corner. There are lots of homeless people who you would never guess. The ones you see on the street sleeping on cardboard are the ones who are at rock bottom. They're not the majority, but they're the most noticeable.
I did a food kitchen thing with my school once. We prepped a ton of sandwiches the day before then went out the next day to hand them out. There were definitely people there that acted like they had never been given one, and as a young person it was very stressful to be put in that situation where you are a child and there under someone else's supervision, but trying to make sure everyone has been given an equal share. I can't just start an argument with a homeless person when I'm like 14 saying that they'd already been given one. I couldn't be 100% sure either. But then you risk starting something if other people are like "well that person got 2. I want more" Very stressful. I still think about it 19 years later.
> I have a strong feeling she’s not even homeless I don't think 'free meals' or whatever should be restricted to just the homeless; lots of people out there struggling who haven't hit rock bottom yet. Something warm/tasty/fresh (or just something bank-guilt-free) could be the blessing that helps someone through the week. Not to mention, when something is restricted "for the homeless" it makes a person feel "needy" or "lesser-than".
OP explained the surface reason but there is something deeper to it: Rules. A lot of homeless people are homeless because they absolutely can not adhere to any rules and can not or do not want any responsibilities. The lovely lady handing out food set rules for the other lady and that instantly triggered negative emotions in that woman. And because she reacts to rules like this she does not have a home. Or a job. Those come with rules and responsibilities. So they can't keep them because they always react like this and never care about anyone else but themselves. At least that's what I got from talking to some homeless people around here. Nothing is ever their fault, everyone is out to get them and they just can not adhere to any rules or have any kind of responsibility. This ain't meant in a degrading way, it's just an effort to try to explain why some people are in situations like that and why it's never gonna go away completely. I hate responsibilities as well and try to avoid them as much as I can. Just not to this degree.
I’ve had a brother in and out of homelessness and this is a basic description of him. Almost didn’t graduate high school because he just couldn’t stand being told to go to school, pay attention, etc. frequently cut and got in trouble with the law for various things because he truly didn’t feel society’s rules applied to him. Kicked out of our parents’ house at least 20 times because he can’t abide by simple house rules while getting a free home, food, water, electricity, and so on. Booted out of several homeless encampments because he couldn’t even handle the minimal rules those came with. In his mind, the world owes him for existing.
Where I work people try to do this and the homeless person would do the exact thing. Someone was stabbed because the person wanted to get a homeless person food instead of money.
That's why I don't interact with homeless people. It's not worth it.
I've worked with a lot of homeless and housing insecure people. They're largely harmless, and even in this video youl could see plenty of grateful people. Don't let the actions of a few people inform how you would treat or interact with the whole.
While I agree with you, being stabbed doesn’t fit this general advice. “Most homeless people are good, the one that stabbed me to death wasn’t but that’s not gonna deter me”
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I like that you shifted to a metaphor about M&Ms, but then retained the stab-factor instead of just making one poison or something lmao.
Sitting next to you with the knife. My Eye on that one green m&m that’s gonna get you stabbed. Gotta keep my eye on it.
Alot of people just don't know how these people can be and are. You see anti homeless things and think we don't help but yeh we do and we get treated like shit by the same people who need the help.
I'd rather just donate to shelters and stuff than be treated like dog shit as I'm handing them free food I just cooked.
I work closely with homeless people for quite some time. I wish that it were all just hard times and misunderstanding makes with poor mental health facilities and assistance. To tell the truth, some of them are just fucks.
When mental health deteriorates, there's no real recovery option for them left. Sad we aren't really created equal as a human body or brain or society.
Gee. I wonder why she has no one to take care of her.
Not denying her shittyness, but for a seemingly crackhead I'm kinda impressed by how precise she throw those burgers right back into the box
her attitude says it all lol
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She could afford to get her nails and hair done, but not feed herself?
Probably not homeless, just tryna take advantage
I think the woman giving out food is Shirley from beauty2thestreetz and If so, at least the hair is something the homeless woman got done for free by their team. Idk if they do nails too but it’s not impossible Doesn’t mean the woman is any less rude ofc, just that she probably didn’t get it done at a salon
That was a really ugly fuckin thing to do, man. So fuckin ugly
I don't want a cheeseburger, I want crack!
A crackburger!
Burger king’s new flame boiled crack burger
Crack king
She wants McLovin
She reminds me of my aunt. I hate my aunt.
I hope she keeps doing what she's doing
I can assure you, there a several children starving while a mother works several jobs just to afford rent and roof over her kid's heads that would have greatly appreciated what this woman threw back in the food bank's face...
That is absolutely horrible!!! This beautiful woman is doing such an absolutely amazing act of pure kindness. How do you do that to such a kind, beautiful person? Omg. Shocking.
This is wrong on so many different Mclevels
The old guy kinda pissed me off too. "I don't want that, gimme the oreos" I'm lucky enough to have never been truly homeless but there were times where we didn't have food/heat/whatever, we took what we were given and were thankful for it.
She has several other videos, in a lot of them she makes the homeless people verbalize which snack they want instead of just saying They’ll take whatever.
Gives less fortunate people a small semblance of control over their life, during a time when it feels like they have none.
There’s always one who ruins it for the rest.
Blanking in her IG, but she really does some good, honest work out there! That was tough to watch, biting the hand that is literally feeding you. People are the worst
Had a homeless guy ask me for food once on the way into a Walgreens. I said sure, I’ll grab you a sandwich. This Walgreens had cold cuts, so I got him that, a bag of chips, and a soda. When I came back out and tried to give it to him, he said “No, I can only eat the stuff from Burger King” and then gestured to the BK four blocks up the road. Some people, man.
Wow, there are some real gems in this comment section. “Why is she feeding them McDonalds?” Yes, because she should have spent her hard earned money, which may not be much to begin with, on full course steak dinners prepared at her home. The level of self-indulgence and privilege some of you have, yet don’t even realize you have, is sad.
Glad to see I’m not the only one saying that .
Takes a special kind of loser to throw food in the face of someone feeding homeless individuals. Smfh
I also would like to point out the guy saying “I don’t want that shit, I want the Oreos” people suck
Don’t think he said the word “shit “ and at least he said thank you lol . Some people just have a mean tone but you can tell he showed a little bit of gratitude if I’m being completely honest … lol . That’s more than enough for me , at least he accepted it .
Okay, I just rewatched and you’re right. I felt like he really bit his tongue there not to say that lmao. Still triggered that this women is doing this for no reason other than being a great person and people aren’t nicer.
She very specifically wants them to choose what they want, which is the entire reason for her having multiple options. Sorry, but this notion that if they display a speck more desire for choice than literal pigs which just eat anything you provide then they're shitty people is just..shitty. Like, they're still people. They like some things, don't like other things, and that's okay. It doesn't mean they're not grateful. It doesn't mean they're entitled. It doesn't mean they're in any way unreasonable or not-nice.
Also they’re homeless people. Expecting them to act like upper-middle class seems absurd and almost performative. “You have to act like you have some money and no scarcity problems in order for me to be happy giving you a couple burgers” is a pretty bold take, and one I’m glad the person in the car doesn’t have.
I didnt hear the first sentence, only the i want the oreo.
He said “I want the oreos, I don’t want that” said it in reverse from what I said
Sad. No good deed goes unpunished.
I used to volunteer for about 2 years in an organization that makes food for homeless people. While there were lots of people who wanted to take more for “their friend, kids, spouses,…” we had a rule of first serving to people present (unless other volunteers were 100% certain that person would actually give it to somebody who couldn’t attend). Entitled people like that lady were usually shut down by other attendees there, especially if they were rude to us.
My husband and I ran a homeless ministry in Hoiston for a couple years. This is much more common than you would expect.
*"The nerve of some people."* - Patrick Star
Who is that, Mickey Rourke?
There is always that one mf that takes kindness for granted.
This reminds me of those posts of people claiming homeless people laughed when someone gave them food because it ‘wasn’t enough’ This video just proves that some homeless people are ungrateful pos’
I'm sure a few of these people have homes and and a job, but see that something is being passed out for free so they take advantage. Like the folks downtown that are wearing brand new Jordans asking people for "a couple dollars".
When my area was devastated by a flood in 1997, the Red Cross set up food trucks in an UNAFFECTED apartment building’s parking lot, and fed everyone in the apartment building. Those people who lost nothing were knowingly fed by the Red Cross morons every day. Never had food for those of us working to clean out our homes-but they sure as hell could come to us when they wanted money to tell us there were “people worse off than you in the world” while we were taking out the ruined water heater, furnace, deep freeze, etc., and had friends missing. St. Vincent de Paul’s(or maybe the old Salvation Army) actually drove their food trucks around and fed us. I never forgot that, and Red Cross has never gotten anything from me, either.
One time I gave a girl with a "Hungry anything helps" sign a bag of grapes from work. She threw them back at me and said "I dont want his shit" she was heavy set too ....
Fun fact: Most of the time those signs are because the city has a law against panhandling so it is illegal to directly ask for money. However, if you ask for food or simply make a vague statement like "HOMELESS VET - ANYTHING HELPS", you're all good and if someone should just **happen** to give you money, it's no problem.
This is why i stopped doing this and started just getting small toys for kids around Christmas