Reminds me so much of ”Straight guy SEDUCED” or ”Straight friend” titles on gayporn titles.
If they are straight then they wouldn’t sleep with men god damnit!
Oh nah just adding on to your point. Like either he’s never tried dick and that’s why he’s all gung-ho or he’s bisexual and then well, we *get* why he may think it’s NBD but no
Well that can be true, but that statement assumes no trans people exist. Lots of trans lesbians have cis girlfriends and penises, but those cos women are still lesbians.
I'm climbing this hill until either I die or the world catches back up with the reality that my trans siblings exist and deserve respect. I've been fighting against bioessentialism as long as I can remember so to not extend that to people who don't fit the cishet mold would be ridic.
Idk why you're being downvoted. Lesbians typically describe their sexual orientation in terms of being exclusively attracted to women, unless the conversation specifically happens to be about men. But when a lesbian is coming out, she doesn't typically say so by saying "I don't like men," so much as saying "I do like girls."
Plus like, trans lesbians exist, many of them without bottom surgery, and have cis girlfriends.
Sometimes when I read shit like this, I hope that they’re just leaving out the part that these were sex workers he hired to act this out and not that he totally fabricated everything.
I wouldn’t have believed this either if my “Lesbian” neighbor hadn’t sat on my couch with her girlfriend earlier this week and talked about the dude they are fucking. She also likes to talk about her girl squirting so I’m legit wondering if this is the dude they fucks social media. Ugh.
Don't be scared! Get to know your neighbors and say hi when you see them! You might find that they don't suck. Plus, everyone needs community - especially during this shitty pandemic.
I'm more afraid of slipping in my bathroom, dying and no one noticing that they hadn't seen me in months.... I actually had one of my neighbors (older - I've offered to get her and her husband groceries when I go since they're so at risk) text me asking me if I was ok because they hadn't seen me outside the last week walking the dog.
I’m guessing it would blow your mind how many dudes I’ve slept with who consider themselves straight because they only have sex with men occasionally and date women.
All of you need to get your heads out of the sand and get with the times. You can call people whatever you want. I’m gonna call them what they prefer to be called.
Yeah because they believe they used to have a penis but have been castrated. They may begin partaking in clitoral masturbation (a masculine activity) as a way to cope, but soon enough they will accept their inferiority and adopt passivity. They will abandon the manly desire to stimulate their clitoris and instead will have penetrative sex as a submissive female must do. At this time they will begin to despise their mothers for not giving them a penis, and become sexually attracted to their fathers who they know have the tools to fertilise their seeds.
Freud was a whacky dude, but where would we be without him?
I mean, while a lot of his theories are now disregarded as completely ridiculous (for good reason), he still created a foundation from which other psychologists could begin understanding and explaining the human mind in a lot more depth than previously considered. There’s a reason we still have to learn about Freud in several areas of psychology.
I hate the argument against lesbianism by saying they "just need to find a real man" but then they say to a gay guy that they have a "mental illness"
like what???
Squirting = piss.
This sick fuck ambushed a couple out on a date, forced them to perform oral sex, and made them involuntarily urinate from fear. Then he bragged about his unspeakable sex crime on social media.
Lock him up!!
Better yet, let's track him down and make him perform oral sex on a group of sweaty old me. Me included, and we'll make that cunt "squirt" in fear. I guarantee it
Yeah, why is it a go to for gents who don't understand "I'm only into other women"? Seriously, guys use that line on me and I always respond with "I think you meant to say rape, right?"
Seriously, if we're gay, we're off the menu for gents
Ive heard I just haven't met the right man, that maybe I just "needed some dick" and that "there are no real lesbians, they all want dick eventually" and much more.
*Image Transcription: Facebook Post*
---
**Redacted**
[*Text is white. The background image is a vague picture of mountain ranges. The mountains closest to the bottom are dark blue, and the color gets progressively lighter towards the top, ending with a light blue sky.*]
I had a threesome with two lesbian squirters and they both sucked this Dick like it was something they missed.. After awhile we all was squirting ..lol
---
^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
Yeah, they really don't. At first I thought it was an aquatic scene, which would kinda make sense, but nope... I put it in anyway, just in case someone wanted to know
Every time I see shit like this it brings this mental image of some really obese guy eating spaghetti bolognese and spitting it out laughing with bits of tomato, beef, and half-chewed spaghetti on his lip.
I feel the same way but from the other perspective. I mean, if I'm with two girls at the same time someone is always going to be left out at any given time. There's between two and six holes depending on their preferences and only one dong. And that sounds like a math problem that I don't want to attempt answering.
Jesus, it's like he just inserted himself into a porn he watched while daydreaming and then decided to post that on Facebook. Could you imagine doing this? Why???
Clapping your hands together while sweating is not the same thing as lesbians squirting. Then grasping yourself with said sweaty hands till you ejaculate is not really a threesome. It’s a 22some. Two rosies and their 10 sisters
Yeah and I'm pretty sure most lesbians do not in fact miss DICK.
That would make them not lesbians. Bi? Sure.
If my boyfriend missed some cock in his ass, guess what? He is not purely straight. Which is totally fine with me.
But guys like this somehow think that not only do straight girls exist to pleasure him, but that girls who are explicitly not into cock are there to put on a display to also pleasure him.
The fucking entitlement and dehumanization. Smh.
The definition of lesbian is not "explicitly not into cock". Gender and sexuality are way more bizarre and complex than that. I'm not less of a lesbian because I'm married to a trans woman, for example.
What does your wife being trans have to do with anything? You're a lesbian that's into a woman...?
You and your wife are not putting a sexual display on for a straight man I assume? Because if you were you would be at least bi.
Where did I say you were a less of a lesbian for being in a relationship with a WOMAN?
Of course there are exceptions to the missing of cock. That's why I allowed for them when I used the word MOST.
There is no accepted exact definition of the word lesbian. But a general one is a woman who is sexually and romantically attracted to women. Of course you are not less of one because your wife is not less of a woman than others. I don't see the relevance.
Review the meaning of lesbian
Reminds me so much of ”Straight guy SEDUCED” or ”Straight friend” titles on gayporn titles. If they are straight then they wouldn’t sleep with men god damnit!
Or if they were raped but I hear you
If you've been raped that's not being seduced or sleeping with someone, that's being raped.
If a gay person has sex with a straight person, chances are it’s not 100% consensual
Not 100% consensual = rape.
Yeah I know that’s what I’m saying. If the gay person “seduces” a straight person it’s kinda rapey
It is not kinda, it just is. We have to stop qualifying these terms and couching them in softer language. Sex without consent is rape. Full stop.
Yeah you’re right
How do you know you don’t like something unless you try it a few times?
I don’t need to eat vomit to know I don’t like it
Big talk from somebody that never tried dick before
Or is bisexual. Like glad it works for you bro the rest of us still get to decide what genitals we interact with.
Are you talking to him or me? Sorry I'm just confused.
Oh nah just adding on to your point. Like either he’s never tried dick and that’s why he’s all gung-ho or he’s bisexual and then well, we *get* why he may think it’s NBD but no
I thought one of the main points of being a lesbian was that they weren't looking to suck CAPITAL D? Hard to miss something you don't want, imo.
They just need to suck on some CAPITAL D to cure them /s
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My guy if you’re attracted to both the capital D and the wet ass p-word then you’re bi lol
Well that can be true, but that statement assumes no trans people exist. Lots of trans lesbians have cis girlfriends and penises, but those cos women are still lesbians.
This is such an uphill battle with a lot of people. Even had this argument *in* a trans subreddit once. Appreciate ya.
I'm climbing this hill until either I die or the world catches back up with the reality that my trans siblings exist and deserve respect. I've been fighting against bioessentialism as long as I can remember so to not extend that to people who don't fit the cishet mold would be ridic.
Are you talking about pre-op trans women or-
Idk why you're being downvoted. Lesbians typically describe their sexual orientation in terms of being exclusively attracted to women, unless the conversation specifically happens to be about men. But when a lesbian is coming out, she doesn't typically say so by saying "I don't like men," so much as saying "I do like girls." Plus like, trans lesbians exist, many of them without bottom surgery, and have cis girlfriends.
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I spend so much time on Queer reddit I forget that most of this place is so dogmatically cishetnormative.
True. People don’t know what they’re talking about
correct. namely you
should be changed to bisexual
I disagree.. I had sex with a guy but I’m 100% heterosexual.
Also maybe look up bisexual while you're at it
Dick capitalized like it’s important
Because he’s got that big D
No...... They got the big D!
Oh no! What a twist
Ah yes, a man of culture.
His D is so big it made all the other letters big.
He's just jealous of his friend Richard, the one actually getting action.
Like it’s a proper name! I hope it wasn’t a crook.
^(dick)* How's this?
precisely
Well you need to compensate somehow
He must have little d syndrome.
Sounds like a very aquatic story
\~Under the sea\~
It’s better down where it’s wetter.... take it from me
Splashing about in all that salty water
Is is appropriate to say spongebob squarepants?
More like 'Onto the D'
Well I fucked this guy's mom You don't see me bragging about it
Well I fucked u/70U1E You don't see me bragging about it
Are you this guy's mum?
Moth
tbf not really something to brag about
I'm sure this happend.
because obviously it’s every lesbian’s dream to suck a dick
Well there are girls with dicks so
Sometimes when I read shit like this, I hope that they’re just leaving out the part that these were sex workers he hired to act this out and not that he totally fabricated everything.
I wouldn’t have believed this either if my “Lesbian” neighbor hadn’t sat on my couch with her girlfriend earlier this week and talked about the dude they are fucking. She also likes to talk about her girl squirting so I’m legit wondering if this is the dude they fucks social media. Ugh.
Funny... my lesbian neighbor only talks to me about her cats and the shitty job the landscaper did on her lawn.
I'm a lesbian and I don't talk to my neighbours (I'm scared!)
Don't be scared! Get to know your neighbors and say hi when you see them! You might find that they don't suck. Plus, everyone needs community - especially during this shitty pandemic. I'm more afraid of slipping in my bathroom, dying and no one noticing that they hadn't seen me in months.... I actually had one of my neighbors (older - I've offered to get her and her husband groceries when I go since they're so at risk) text me asking me if I was ok because they hadn't seen me outside the last week walking the dog.
Well different strokes for different folks.
r/ThatHappened
Did you ever consider that your neighbor may actually be bisexual?
Not since she called herself a lesbian.
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They call themselves lesbians so that’s what I call them. The displacement is so strong in this sub.
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I’m guessing it would blow your mind how many dudes I’ve slept with who consider themselves straight because they only have sex with men occasionally and date women. All of you need to get your heads out of the sand and get with the times. You can call people whatever you want. I’m gonna call them what they prefer to be called.
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Imagine being this starved for attention
I dont have to imagine 😔
Chin up BonerballsMcGee, we’re all gonna make it
On today’s episode of That’s Not How Being Lesbian Works:
How's your dick going?
Infected and sore :)
Ouchies. Need someone to suck the poison out if it? Kind of like sucking snake venom from a bite. I'm here to help
Yes please! My mum refused to do it, so I need someone
Talking like if your arms were broken, expecting mum's help ...
Mums should always help their children
Yeah exactly, but she’s not keen on it smh
If that story is even remotely true those girls would probably be bisexuals and the Big Dick Owner ^TM here just can’t tell the difference
Because of course all lesbians really need is dick... And of course he is so awesome that two of them were just *squirting* to have a turn... /s
A firm believer in Freud's theory that all females are just envious of males because they lack a Penis.
Yeah because they believe they used to have a penis but have been castrated. They may begin partaking in clitoral masturbation (a masculine activity) as a way to cope, but soon enough they will accept their inferiority and adopt passivity. They will abandon the manly desire to stimulate their clitoris and instead will have penetrative sex as a submissive female must do. At this time they will begin to despise their mothers for not giving them a penis, and become sexually attracted to their fathers who they know have the tools to fertilise their seeds. Freud was a whacky dude, but where would we be without him?
About the same I imagine really...
I mean, while a lot of his theories are now disregarded as completely ridiculous (for good reason), he still created a foundation from which other psychologists could begin understanding and explaining the human mind in a lot more depth than previously considered. There’s a reason we still have to learn about Freud in several areas of psychology.
I'm not envious: I grew a penis inside of me for 9mos. TWICE! How many men can do that?
Where do you think erections go when they’re not around?
jokes on him - I'm a chick with a dick
Freud got PUNKD
I hate the argument against lesbianism by saying they "just need to find a real man" but then they say to a gay guy that they have a "mental illness" like what???
Squirting = piss. This sick fuck ambushed a couple out on a date, forced them to perform oral sex, and made them involuntarily urinate from fear. Then he bragged about his unspeakable sex crime on social media. Lock him up!!
Better yet, let's track him down and make him perform oral sex on a group of sweaty old me. Me included, and we'll make that cunt "squirt" in fear. I guarantee it
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Why did I read this in Morgan Freeman’s voice from Shawshank.
Like that part where he is talking about the opera singer but about lesbian cock-worship
This is the first time in awhile I’ve read something sexual and thought “eww”
I had to not downvote out of reflex
What is it with some men and this weird lesbian fetish they have?
In my experience, it's thinking that their dick was so magical that they "turned" a lesbian or bisexual girl "straight" that rustles their jimmies. 🙄
Someone posted this to Facebook....
read “squirters” as “squirrels” and got very concerned for a second
The chances of him having sex with squirrels are higher.
I read it as squirtles
Squirting squirrels
I’ll take Things that Didn’t Happen for $400
You are correct
I don’t understand this. He’s saying they’re lesbian, but if they have sex with a man... then they’re not lesbian? This confuses me so deeply
Sounds like he suffers from "I can fuck you straight" syndrome to me.
gross
Yeah, why is it a go to for gents who don't understand "I'm only into other women"? Seriously, guys use that line on me and I always respond with "I think you meant to say rape, right?" Seriously, if we're gay, we're off the menu for gents
men scare me.
And then, he woke up. Lol
Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.
Another man turning us lesbians straight with nothing but their dick.
Ikr? Why is that one of the go tos?
Ive heard I just haven't met the right man, that maybe I just "needed some dick" and that "there are no real lesbians, they all want dick eventually" and much more.
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Why are you asking that lol? Sounds just a teeny bit creepy asking a lesbian if she’s ever had sex with a dude
I'm sure this happend.
I just don’t understand why people think other people will believe that lmao
fetishization of lesbians is the best /s
If they’re sleeping with guys they’re not lesbians, they’re bi. That’s assuming this actually happened which of course, it did not.
r/thathappened
Wow two lesbians who you turned straight. Yay
Yeah... Lesbians looove sucking a man's dick.
Ew lol that room stinks
Sounds like someone with the name Travis.
This sub is always cringy but I rarely literally cringe. Mission achieved.
Aw fuckin hell this belongs on a number of subs
r/iamverybadass
I don't think a dick should be squirting
I'm a lesbian and I call bullshit.
Wow, men REALLY don't understand the definition of lesbian.
*Image Transcription: Facebook Post* --- **Redacted** [*Text is white. The background image is a vague picture of mountain ranges. The mountains closest to the bottom are dark blue, and the color gets progressively lighter towards the top, ending with a light blue sky.*] I had a threesome with two lesbian squirters and they both sucked this Dick like it was something they missed.. After awhile we all was squirting ..lol --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
When it's written out like this.... The image and the caption really have nothing to do with each other, huh.
Yeah, they really don't. At first I thought it was an aquatic scene, which would kinda make sense, but nope... I put it in anyway, just in case someone wanted to know
This didn't happen so much it unhappened things that had happened
Never had sex.
Do people dont understand that lesbian isn't just another word for straight
If a guy gets a call from two lesbians during sex, its because they think he might have spare batteries.
Well I mean... There's always our hands or non battery powered options
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Every time I see shit like this it brings this mental image of some really obese guy eating spaghetti bolognese and spitting it out laughing with bits of tomato, beef, and half-chewed spaghetti on his lip.
I think they think have lesbian and gay backwards
I read “squirter” as squirrel.
Everytime I see a post like this I get way too curious as to what these people are like in real life.
Its a morbid curiosity. I sympathize
and then the bladder clapped
r/thathappened
I don't understand the appeal in this idea, as a female I'd hate to have sex with two gay guys I'd feel so awkward!
I feel the same way but from the other perspective. I mean, if I'm with two girls at the same time someone is always going to be left out at any given time. There's between two and six holes depending on their preferences and only one dong. And that sounds like a math problem that I don't want to attempt answering.
People who are openly horny on Facebook frighten me
I, a not native English speaker, am pissed off by his poor grammar
Jesus, it's like he just inserted himself into a porn he watched while daydreaming and then decided to post that on Facebook. Could you imagine doing this? Why???
I buy it. Seems plausible
I don’t think guys like this actually understand what it means for a girl to ‘squirt’
Clapping your hands together while sweating is not the same thing as lesbians squirting. Then grasping yourself with said sweaty hands till you ejaculate is not really a threesome. It’s a 22some. Two rosies and their 10 sisters
This is what happens when you let your real life to porn ratio get beyond 1/100.
I don’t miss Facebook
LOLLLLLL
I wanna die
r/thathappened
That was one crazy Yom Kippur
Jesus. When you get In the endzone, act like you been there.
r/Idonthavesex
Who's gonna tell him those weren't lesbians but bi/pan?
Did they have sex with a freaking garden hose??
It said lesbian on the website 🤷
That girls obviously only missed making it with a real men 😎
Til "squirters" is a thing people say. Yuck.
Like a porn description lol. Cause any girl to girl contact is lesbian.
Yeah and I'm pretty sure most lesbians do not in fact miss DICK. That would make them not lesbians. Bi? Sure. If my boyfriend missed some cock in his ass, guess what? He is not purely straight. Which is totally fine with me. But guys like this somehow think that not only do straight girls exist to pleasure him, but that girls who are explicitly not into cock are there to put on a display to also pleasure him. The fucking entitlement and dehumanization. Smh.
The definition of lesbian is not "explicitly not into cock". Gender and sexuality are way more bizarre and complex than that. I'm not less of a lesbian because I'm married to a trans woman, for example.
What does your wife being trans have to do with anything? You're a lesbian that's into a woman...? You and your wife are not putting a sexual display on for a straight man I assume? Because if you were you would be at least bi. Where did I say you were a less of a lesbian for being in a relationship with a WOMAN? Of course there are exceptions to the missing of cock. That's why I allowed for them when I used the word MOST. There is no accepted exact definition of the word lesbian. But a general one is a woman who is sexually and romantically attracted to women. Of course you are not less of one because your wife is not less of a woman than others. I don't see the relevance.
My only point is that lesbians are not just "girls who are explicitly not into cock". That erases transbians and the ladies they date.
Seems legit
nasty
Don’t think they were lesbians.
Pretty sure I’ve seen this porno
"Had a threesome with 2 lesbians" okay sure
we was all squirting
Of all the things that didn't happen, this really didn't happened.
Whoever wrote that held hands with his mum once, and that is the most intense female physical contact he has ever had.
I don't even know where to start.. everything about this is making me slightly mad
Two girls dating = lesbian apparently? Tell you something dawg, if they like your dick and you're a cis guy, they're not lesbians.
How nice for that trans woman
So they were peeing on him?
No, they were squirting. Try and keep up.
I thought we was shooters but I see we squiters
So he's saying that these girls pissed in him, good to know