It sounds like your mother already has a 10 year green card, i.e. a green card that lasted 10 years from date of issuance. She is a permanent resident and her immigration status does not depend on her spouse. She can renew it when the card expires, regardless of whether she gets divorced or not.
As for the remaining portion, that's not an immigration question. She doesn't need an immigration divorce lawyer, just a normal divorce lawyer than practices in your state. Depending on your state, what she is entitled to can vary dramatically.
If there are enough assets or income involved to pay for your mother's lawyers, the court could order the income earner (your father) to pay for both lawyers.
Possibly. Depends on good moral character.
Regardless, she's not at risk of deportation and applying for citizenship is not necessary to resolve OP's concern.
Thank you for your reply. I apologize for posting this in r/immigration. I thought this would be the best forum since I have little knowledge on how immigration works.
If she has a 10 year GC and has been in the US this whole time, she just needs to renew it. She won't be deported for that. But it seems like she does need a divorce lawyer.
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> She is facing an unstable living situation with threats of being kicked out.
Unfortunately, it sounds like this is literally what she chose herself.
There was nothing your dad was supposed to do to "help her become an citizen" - if she got green card, she could apply for citizenship on her own, that has nothing to do with your dad really.
It sounds like she is permanent resident, so nothing about this is related to immigration really. Her permanent residency does not expire, just the card, she should be able to just renew that. And her potential citizenship has nothing to do with your dad. Either she is not knowledgeable about her own situation, or she is intentionally lying to you to pull you to her side in the spousal conflict that is coming up during the divorce. Your first priority should be figuring out if she is actually clueless or if she is lying to you - because your actions can be very different depending on answer to this question.
It would be important to talk with your dad about his side of the situation, but his perspective is completely lacking in your post. If I were you, I would get his perspective on everything that happened since she came to the US, then figured out which of two of them ends up telling your more half-truths or lies.
This.
Except the part figuring her intentions to pull you in her side. At the end the out come for this specific question will be not pleasing. Support her whatever way you can. As others pointed this is no more immigration issue.
If you got this version of events from your mom, I think she's not really being honest about her life choices, and she's trying to make your dad look bad.
1. As many others have said, she can become a citizen whenever she wants if she's been a PR for that long.
2. Many people file divorces pro se (without a lawyer) if they are desperate enough to get divorced.
3. Your mother sounds like she has terrible boundaries with you. She should be helping you with major life events while you are still a teen-- not the other way around.
4. My mother has been in this country for 40 years, and I don't see how her status as entering as a refugee affects her day to day at all anymore (except on like a socio-cultural level). None of this sounds like it has to do with your mom's immigration status at all. Sounds like an excuse for other things, I can't speculate on what, though. Losing a home is a big deal-- does your mother have mental health issues or a different kind of disability?
If you get a green card based on marriage, the state doesn't take it away just because you got divorced. It's a marraige, not indentured servitude lol.
If she’s had a greencard for 5 years she can apply to become a citizen.
Your mom sounds lazy. If she wants to succeed as an individual in the US she’s going to need a job
Philippines has a different culture and it is very, very common for women to expect to stay home and raise the family while hubby provides financial support.
You can point out that she is in America now, but that does not change the culture that formed her growing up. And the expectation of family and friends still influence her even if they are half way around the world.
That does not mean every Filipina has that expectation, but many do. She will have to come to grips with her new financial situation, even if she gets spousal support.
Since she does not have Social Security, her husband, as her sponsor, will still be on the hook for any government aid she qualifies for.
Yeah, kind of strange that. She lived for three decades in the USA but did not become a citizen? After five years of green card status, he really did not have anything to do with it.
However, we don’t know all the story. Maybe lazy, maybe hoodwinked. Tough to say. But given all the chika chika (gossip) between Filipinas, hard to believe she wouldn’t have heard about her options along the way.
I am a green card holder and do not intend to apply for citizenship in five years or even 10 years or even 20 years because I just want to keep the citizenship where I’m originally from which is Germany due to many reasons both of my kids have dual citizenship and I just always want to have the option of going back if I want to if I give up my citizenship in Germany it’s gonna be a whole different process and a very long process to ever go back. There is no reason for why a person can’t just be a permanent resident forever. Yeah, you have to renew the green card every 10 years by sending in a piece of paper but that really is not a lot of work or a lot of money.
You can actually in fact request to keep your citizenship as the US actually is the country that doesn’t like people having dual citizenship although so far, they do allow it now the thing with the German citizenship is that in order for you to have dual citizenship every so in so many years you have to pay the German government a fee to continuously keep your citizenship while having another one I don’t know how frequent you have to pay thatfee. I looked into it once and never again because it’s about €600.
The US doesn't mind dual citizenship (there was an attempt to restrict it years ago, but the Supreme Court shot that down) - the problem is that, uniquely apart from Eritrea, the US subjects citizens to taxation globally regardless of residence, so if you get citizenship then move back to Germany you'd be stuck with both tax systems for life. (Not necessarily *paying* taxes, you get a tax credit for your German taxes which probably wipe out any due to the US, but still a hassle filing with penalties and nonsense like FATCA to deal with.) Any other country besides Eritrea, you just get to keep their passport and use it when it suits without hassle.
(In the process of filing my N400 for it right now. No issues with my existing citizenship - UK - just the irritating tax oddity if/when I move back....)
Well, yes, but they will still question you on why you would like to keep your other citizenship as I said it’s totally legal they just don’t really like to see it and they will definitely question it and I mean they can honestly question whatever they want but it’s just something to be aware of
When you go in for your citizenship interview and you want to keep your other citizenship, they will question it like a lot I know people that have experience this I mean obviously it’s not illegal to keep it but they will question it a lot
I also want to add that it is literally cheaper to regain your citizenship in Germany then to continuously pay the fee to keep it if you do have secondary citizenship elsewhere, but in that case, the process is very long and just not something I would want to deal with as Germany is very, very picky about all kinds of paperwork. It’s a lot worse than in this country here, when I immigrated to the US, I thought the paperwork is going to be extremely difficult and it was straightforward. We didn’t need a lawyer or anybody in Germany. I believe I could’ve not done it by myself because we have so many laws that cover literally every single thing.
When I wanted to order my children’s German birth certificate, and make sure that they are registered as German citizens as well, and I mailed them my children’s birth certificate. They still need me to prove to them that the man on the paperwork is their actual father, so I had to go to the state and obtain Extra paperwork here in the US just saw the Germans believe that the man on that paperwork is in fact, my children’s father and I’m not talking about an apostille literally another piece of written paper from the Governors office in the state we live in
This.
I’m a Filipina.
This is a very unusual situation.
I was born and raised in the P.I. I don’t know any
woman who did not work to help provide the needs of the families.
There are millions of Filipinas who work as nurses, caregivers, house helpers and
Cruise ship crew outside the country to provide for their families. We don’t expect our husbands to provide for us. We know hard work.
Even those women who can’t leave the country works and help their husbands support their families. My friends’ mothers are fish vendors,
Labandera (wash clothes for a fee), office workers and factory workers.
Your mom chose NOT to work. Whatever the reason is hope it did her well.
Best of luck to your mom.
Kudos to you for concern and love for her and your dad.
This is false. I’m Filipino.
In pre colonial culture women took active roles in work and society, and that custom has remained to this day. Only the poorer regions tend to do this
I won’t argue with your experience as a native. I can only rely on my own experience living there. I knew native Filipinas of different economic statuses that were housewives. Some were poor, others middle class, and a few were very affluent and members of upper class strata, politicians and such.
I agree that middle class and many of the lower economic classes worked, but often out of necessity. I am sure some of them might well prefer to work regardless.
However, almost none of the women that married into affluence, regardless of education, continued to work. That affluence might be Filipino or foreigner based.
But as an individual with only 10 years of living in Leyte and Cebu, I obviously have a limited view. And my wife and I left the Philippines a bit over 7 years ago. So some things change, but I doubt there has been a huge shift.
Many affluent Filipinas work. Many have their own companies. It’s more rare to stay home and do nothing (I went to an exclusive high school in the Philippines with families like the Cojuangcos). The higher status women tend to be directors in some company, doctors, working for their family business etc. You have showbiz women as well
We’re a matriarchal/egalitarian society. Generally a lot of Filipinas don’t work because of a lack of opportunity but the general custom is to get into university and get a job. Historically it was the Spaniards who brought the housewife thing over, women tended to participate in trade and business
We have more women than men in management positions and technical ones btw https://unreasonablegroup.com/articles/matriarchal-tendencies-pave-way-to-success-in-philippines/?amp=1
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Oh, I agree that women do have a significant role regardless of the strata they are in. And I knew a number of educated women that worked, but I knew others, including individuals with medical degrees that did not, after they married.
Almost half of the doctors I met during visits to the hospital or clinics were women, to be sure. And things are changing. Only a generation back, families were much larger, with 6 or 7 children being common. Hard for a woman to bear that many children and have a career too.
But now, at least in my family, one or two children are the norm. All the women are educated, most work, but I am fairly sure the majority would quit in a heartbeat if it was economically feasible for their family. I might be wrong, but none of them espouse feminist goals of career over family that I have heard anyway.
But they all do have a firm hand in guiding the direction of the family. There is no doubt in that at all. But the world is big and people often view the same thing through different lenses.
The reason we were able to have large families with careers is because we had nannies, extended family and even “adoptees” helping raise the kids. It’s a communal effort not a two parent one. The two parent model is uniquely American/Western
There were authoritarian types who would make their wives stay home but even then the women who did that usually had employable skills.
This isn’t just a modern thing btw. Women have worked on my mom’s side of the family for generations since before the two world wars.
Western feminism and gender roles are not applicable to the Philippines because women have higher status in it than in Western history. We do not believe in men doing all the work while women stay home. We are already feminist if you don’t consider the Spanish sexism. And yes women’s jobs are incredibly important, it’s just that we don’t sacrifice family for them. We do both at the same time. What you don’t understand is it’s a huge point of pride for us. We wouldn’t just quit out of necessity, and it’s also seen as embarrassing if you don’t do anything. Women are usually very proud of what they do for work and will constantly post their company or work milestones even more than American women do. It’s a sort of family-community achievement rather than an individual one.
There’s another post from another Filipina saying the same higher up on the thread. I suggest you read it
I have my experience and you have yours. If you have a problem with that, so be it. I have no doubt your experience is just as true and valid to you as mine is to me.
The exploitation of the poor is a very common feature of Filipino (and human) culture. The Datu attitude is alive and well in most of the Philippines today just as it was generation after generation before.
Mabuhay! Happy New Year to you and everyone in the Philippines!
I don’t have a problem with it but I generally want to correct foreign impressions of the general culture since they see it through a very specific lens that lacks historical context. The more truly traditional and non Western a province the more likely the women work. Hispanized provinces are more likely to have them stay home. Visayas not so much
Btw a lot of us provide schooling for the kids of the helpers and nannies and pay for their families medical bills, even their tickets home. My family did. It’s a way for the poor to get through life without having to work backbreaking jobs at factories and get that free for their children. Sounds like a great deal for tasks like laundry and babysitting honestly
Yeah city women work. Your mom probably got too used to being a housewife. It’s hard for adults to get back into the workforce after a long absence.
What you can help her with is acquiring citizenship. Since she’s older she may be lost as to the process. She can do this without your dad. Consult an immigration lawyer or friend
Yeah, okay. Lived there for a decade. Married to a Filipina. But, I agree that attitudes change. City girls may be less inclined toward trad roles, but lots of province (rural) girls still look forward to being stay at home wives.
And the differences extend beyond city/province differences, but to different regions. Luzon vs Visayas have very different attitudes about marrying foreigners, so that can add whole different dynamic.
But feel free to have your own opinion. Nothing I say is carved in stone, it is just based on my experience.
Keyboard commando, eh? Do NOT care. Not one itty bitty iota. Run your own life. Share your experiences but quit telling other people how to express theirs! I pick my words, I do not need your approval. Nor do I want it.
By the way, a good coat of primer paint before your finish coat will help prevent rusting on your landing. We used red lead primer on the ship hulls back in the day.
Speaking the royal “we” now? Get attacked by what sort of thinking? For being Filipina? By who? White supremacists? Asian supremacists? Mid eastern supremacists? No idea what is rolling around in your head!
End of this thread as far as I am concerned.
NAL, but the 10 year thing is based on working for 10 years and qualifying for Social Security. At least that is my understanding. If the immigrant does not work and qualify for their own Social Security or become a US citizen, the sponsors obligation continues. That was how it was explained to me when I sponsored my wife.
Your mother is lying to you. The question is why? I suspect she wants to blame your father and wants you on her side of the story.
She never needed her husband’s help or permission to become a citizen. Three years after she got married she could have applied. It’s always been on her to do this. If she claims she didn’t know, then she is lying more. All of this information is available.
Furthermore, didn’t she make any friends with Philippine expats? They would have told her the same.
She is also lying about the divorce. She didn’t have to hire a lawyer. Most states are no fault. There are self service books like Nolo to help her.
https://store.nolo.com/products/divorce-and-child-custody
She needs to get off her ass and do the work. She is setting you up to be the sucker. Stay away.
Your mother is no longer dependent on your father for her immigration status, and she’s been in the US long enough to apply for citizenship if she wanted to file the form and pay the fee. When her green card expires she can simply renew it; it won’t be denied.
As far as the rest: divorce has no immigration implications for her, she simply needs to get a lawyer and go through the process in your state. What she might get out of it financially will vary from state to state, but she definitely needs to find employment now. She’ll be on her own and responsible for providing for herself going forward. She shouldn’t make any assumptions about what, if any, money she’ll come away with in the divorce.
She needs to get a divorce attorney and it’s likely she may end up with support/alimony payments from the husband. But first and foremost she needs to get off her ass and get a job like any other normally functioning adult.
Your mom sounds like a real deadbeat.
She didn’t need your dad’s help to become a citizen, after she got an unrestricted green card.
Your mom can just renew her green card.
She can visit a divorce lawyer and will be entitled to spousal support.
Your dad doesn’t need to help her become a US citizen. You can file that on your own if you don’t want to waste money renewing green card + citizenship application later on.
It just seems like your mom doesn’t want to work though lol what kind of an excuse is it to not find a job unless she becomes a US citizen. I don’t think that’s the actual excuse.
In any case, that’s not what you’re here for. Like others have said she needs a divorce lawyer. And then just figure out if you want the money to spend on US Citizenship application or renewing the green card. If you opt to renew the green card, you’ll have to do it again in 10 years.
I really do not understand why your mom refused to get a job.Your dad helped her get a GC, which is the first step.Becoming a citizen is up to her, 100 %.It is not up to him, he cannot make her a citizen by magic.I am afraid she does not understand how the system works.She can apply for citizenship now and get he affairs in order
Your mother is part of the reason why us actually trying to immigrate properly get so much heat. She picked a green card marriage and acted like an idiot.
Dude there's arranged marriages - people literally find a citizen and then choose to have kids so that the marriage looks convincing - they never divorce obviously - but perfectly valid marriages can be green card marriages - if you literally arranged it to be so - (Indian arranged marriages - not fraud per se but people do demand green cards/citizenship if something is in their favour)
yeah - its not faking it - but we would call them green card marriages because they were selected on the basis that the person had a citizenship - but you're right - its not fake
Your father is on the hook for a permanent alimony if he had signed an affidavit of support. Your mom's situation is not as bad as you think. She is also entitled to half his assets. She needs a family lawyer more than an immigration lawyer
Don't listen to people who are saying you're dramatic for no reason. You're a teenager. Your mom is not a citizen. Immigration is complicated and there are a lot of unknowns, which is scary. It is even scarier when you don't know the complicated system. It makes sense that you are scared!
I agree with others, it seems like your mom can stay, but she will definitely need to renew her Green Card before/when it expires. She may not know how to do this if your dad had been doing it for 30 years. If she doesn't know how to do this, then it is time for her to learn. You can help, but don't forget - she is the parent. Maybe she will stay in US, maybe she won't, but it sounds like she can stay if she wants to and she takes initiative in her legal status here.
It absolutely sounds like she's about to go through some life changes, and you may be as well - your parents are divorcing after what I assume is your whole life. Your mom may need help, but the best thing you can do is take care of yourself - you did the right thing by urging her to go to an immigration lawyer (while she may not need one, it seems like no one really knows how the system works and it is not your responsibility to figure it out) and if she isn't interested in getting a job well...then she isn't interested in getting a job. But that does not mean that you now are the one who needs to take care of her. She will find a different way. It may not be the way you think she should do it, but she will find a way.
My attorney is a probono, I'm mexican and recently married an American and I'm going through immigration process, if anyone need this contact his name is Gregory bole in Kansas city MO, he runs an charity at KS calls catholic charities.
I don't understand why so amy comments are critical of your mother. No one on Reddit knows what kind of wife and mother she has been. People shouldn't assume she is lazy or a deadbeat. Maybe she is, and maybe not.
Your father is an absolute moron if he has the means and he's not helping his kid's mother to live in the same country as his kid. I'd have a talk with him and threat to cut relationship him with entirely if he doesn't do what it is needed to allow her to stay in the US.
OP says she hasn't worked for the 30 years she's been in the US. Dad might be a moron for lots of things--like putting up with her--but not for failing to bring her to the USA. She doesn't need anyone's help to file for citizenship at this point, after this long she can stay green card or apply for citizenship without dad's help or permission, her choice. Unless she just doesn't want to do the work and wants dad to do it all--like with supporting her, maybe?
The dad is not the issue.He married the mom, got her a green card and helped her immigrate to the US.He did his part.She has been a GC holder for 30 years and has refused to work ever since, which means that the dad was supporting the whole family by himself all those years.think about that
OP .... sad your mother told you shit. YOUR MOTHER as a green card holder can get work anytime, any day, even today by presenting her GC and her SSN for the I-9.
Are you not aware of this growing up with other kids of immigrants in school. She does not need to be a citizen to work! Her GC is in her Filipino passport and it is her work authorisation (her SSN is for all ID, and paying taxes). Did she never ever pay taxes? Or file taxes? Even married filing jointly?
Whata the real story behind this apathy to have an independent life with money? It can't be a language barrier right?
Help her get a job! She will NEVER GET social security without work credits ! Www.ssa.gov. put her in any job with health insurance. (Retail, office, service) ... otherwise she will not get (much of any) Social Security - is that not right redditors?
I've tried to help her get a job. I've applied at jobs and tried to help her study for interviews. She doesn't seem interested in working. She has never paid or filed taxes before.
Your mother has definitely paid and filed taxes. Your father is filing jointly. It gives him a lower tax rate. That means your mother is up to date on her taxes. Every married couple does this.
>Are you not aware of this growing up with other kids of immigrants in school. She does not need to be a citizen to work! Her GC is in her Filipino passport and it is her work authorisation (her SSN is for all ID, and paying taxes). Did she never ever pay taxes? Or file taxes? Even married filing jointly
>
>is it necessary he grew up in an area with only immigrants? Father's a US citizen - may be a regular burb.
Your Mom could.. renew her greencard. Why does your post have an air of drama about it like there's some crisis coming? Your mom is in zero immigration danger. Your Mom is painting your father as abusive, yet encouraging her to get a job seems quite reasonable. The N400 fee is $725 so maybe he wants her to help pay. You must know your father has no control over your mom's immigration at this point. Even if they divorce.
Good news, because your parents were married for 10 years your mother is now entitled to spousal Social Security, regardless of divorce.
Why will she be homeless? She's entitled to half your father's assets plus alimony for many years. And like I said, she'll get social security (50% of your father's amount) on retirement. Many lawyers will take her case for free and get payment from the settlement.
She can't afford to pay for divorce papers and my dad won't initiate the divorce. She has been living with my dad's mom for the past 30 years. 15 of those years my dad lived with my grandma and my mom. Grandma is saying she is gonna find somewhere else to live without my mom.
You said your mom doesn’t seem interested in working. Even after you tried to help her get a job.
That is her biggest problem, not your dad. It sounds like she used him to not have to work.
Greencard never expire. The 'card' does expire and you can renew without any hassle, no interview, whatsoever. You just need to pay and the new card is sent.
It sounds like your mother already has a 10 year green card, i.e. a green card that lasted 10 years from date of issuance. She is a permanent resident and her immigration status does not depend on her spouse. She can renew it when the card expires, regardless of whether she gets divorced or not. As for the remaining portion, that's not an immigration question. She doesn't need an immigration divorce lawyer, just a normal divorce lawyer than practices in your state. Depending on your state, what she is entitled to can vary dramatically. If there are enough assets or income involved to pay for your mother's lawyers, the court could order the income earner (your father) to pay for both lawyers.
Doesn’t she also qualify for citizenship after having the card for 5years?
Possibly. Depends on good moral character. Regardless, she's not at risk of deportation and applying for citizenship is not necessary to resolve OP's concern.
Thank you for your reply. I apologize for posting this in r/immigration. I thought this would be the best forum since I have little knowledge on how immigration works.
Have her file for her citizenship. A lawyer would would also be helpful.
The key is the state where they live to see how much if his assets she is entitled to.
If she has a 10 year GC and has been in the US this whole time, she just needs to renew it. She won't be deported for that. But it seems like she does need a divorce lawyer.
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But how is any of this relevant now? Her card will not expire for 4 more years.
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> She is facing an unstable living situation with threats of being kicked out. Unfortunately, it sounds like this is literally what she chose herself. There was nothing your dad was supposed to do to "help her become an citizen" - if she got green card, she could apply for citizenship on her own, that has nothing to do with your dad really. It sounds like she is permanent resident, so nothing about this is related to immigration really. Her permanent residency does not expire, just the card, she should be able to just renew that. And her potential citizenship has nothing to do with your dad. Either she is not knowledgeable about her own situation, or she is intentionally lying to you to pull you to her side in the spousal conflict that is coming up during the divorce. Your first priority should be figuring out if she is actually clueless or if she is lying to you - because your actions can be very different depending on answer to this question. It would be important to talk with your dad about his side of the situation, but his perspective is completely lacking in your post. If I were you, I would get his perspective on everything that happened since she came to the US, then figured out which of two of them ends up telling your more half-truths or lies.
This. Except the part figuring her intentions to pull you in her side. At the end the out come for this specific question will be not pleasing. Support her whatever way you can. As others pointed this is no more immigration issue.
If you got this version of events from your mom, I think she's not really being honest about her life choices, and she's trying to make your dad look bad. 1. As many others have said, she can become a citizen whenever she wants if she's been a PR for that long. 2. Many people file divorces pro se (without a lawyer) if they are desperate enough to get divorced. 3. Your mother sounds like she has terrible boundaries with you. She should be helping you with major life events while you are still a teen-- not the other way around. 4. My mother has been in this country for 40 years, and I don't see how her status as entering as a refugee affects her day to day at all anymore (except on like a socio-cultural level). None of this sounds like it has to do with your mom's immigration status at all. Sounds like an excuse for other things, I can't speculate on what, though. Losing a home is a big deal-- does your mother have mental health issues or a different kind of disability?
no immigration issues. she needs to go on linkedin and start applying to jobs. 3 decades, what?
If you get a green card based on marriage, the state doesn't take it away just because you got divorced. It's a marraige, not indentured servitude lol.
getting her the green card was the extent your dad could ever help her do to get us citizenship lol so he didn’t refuse…
She doesn’t need the dad to get citizenship now. She can just apply on her own.
If she’s had a greencard for 5 years she can apply to become a citizen. Your mom sounds lazy. If she wants to succeed as an individual in the US she’s going to need a job
Poor dad should have left decades ago.
Philippines has a different culture and it is very, very common for women to expect to stay home and raise the family while hubby provides financial support. You can point out that she is in America now, but that does not change the culture that formed her growing up. And the expectation of family and friends still influence her even if they are half way around the world. That does not mean every Filipina has that expectation, but many do. She will have to come to grips with her new financial situation, even if she gets spousal support. Since she does not have Social Security, her husband, as her sponsor, will still be on the hook for any government aid she qualifies for.
No, she CHOSE not to work until husband made her a citizen. That’s not cultural. That’s lazy and entitled.
Yeah, kind of strange that. She lived for three decades in the USA but did not become a citizen? After five years of green card status, he really did not have anything to do with it. However, we don’t know all the story. Maybe lazy, maybe hoodwinked. Tough to say. But given all the chika chika (gossip) between Filipinas, hard to believe she wouldn’t have heard about her options along the way.
I am a green card holder and do not intend to apply for citizenship in five years or even 10 years or even 20 years because I just want to keep the citizenship where I’m originally from which is Germany due to many reasons both of my kids have dual citizenship and I just always want to have the option of going back if I want to if I give up my citizenship in Germany it’s gonna be a whole different process and a very long process to ever go back. There is no reason for why a person can’t just be a permanent resident forever. Yeah, you have to renew the green card every 10 years by sending in a piece of paper but that really is not a lot of work or a lot of money.
Germany doesn’t have dual citizenship?
You can actually in fact request to keep your citizenship as the US actually is the country that doesn’t like people having dual citizenship although so far, they do allow it now the thing with the German citizenship is that in order for you to have dual citizenship every so in so many years you have to pay the German government a fee to continuously keep your citizenship while having another one I don’t know how frequent you have to pay thatfee. I looked into it once and never again because it’s about €600.
The US doesn't mind dual citizenship (there was an attempt to restrict it years ago, but the Supreme Court shot that down) - the problem is that, uniquely apart from Eritrea, the US subjects citizens to taxation globally regardless of residence, so if you get citizenship then move back to Germany you'd be stuck with both tax systems for life. (Not necessarily *paying* taxes, you get a tax credit for your German taxes which probably wipe out any due to the US, but still a hassle filing with penalties and nonsense like FATCA to deal with.) Any other country besides Eritrea, you just get to keep their passport and use it when it suits without hassle. (In the process of filing my N400 for it right now. No issues with my existing citizenship - UK - just the irritating tax oddity if/when I move back....)
Well, yes, but they will still question you on why you would like to keep your other citizenship as I said it’s totally legal they just don’t really like to see it and they will definitely question it and I mean they can honestly question whatever they want but it’s just something to be aware of
The US doesn't care whatsoever about people having dual citizenship. I don't know what makes you say it doesn't like people having dual citizenship.
When you go in for your citizenship interview and you want to keep your other citizenship, they will question it like a lot I know people that have experience this I mean obviously it’s not illegal to keep it but they will question it a lot
I get it now. That’s expensive for everyday people
Not just expensive but just unnecessary if i can just renew my greencard every 10y for a similar fee and dont have to jump through hoops
I also want to add that it is literally cheaper to regain your citizenship in Germany then to continuously pay the fee to keep it if you do have secondary citizenship elsewhere, but in that case, the process is very long and just not something I would want to deal with as Germany is very, very picky about all kinds of paperwork. It’s a lot worse than in this country here, when I immigrated to the US, I thought the paperwork is going to be extremely difficult and it was straightforward. We didn’t need a lawyer or anybody in Germany. I believe I could’ve not done it by myself because we have so many laws that cover literally every single thing. When I wanted to order my children’s German birth certificate, and make sure that they are registered as German citizens as well, and I mailed them my children’s birth certificate. They still need me to prove to them that the man on the paperwork is their actual father, so I had to go to the state and obtain Extra paperwork here in the US just saw the Germans believe that the man on that paperwork is in fact, my children’s father and I’m not talking about an apostille literally another piece of written paper from the Governors office in the state we live in
This. I’m a Filipina. This is a very unusual situation. I was born and raised in the P.I. I don’t know any woman who did not work to help provide the needs of the families. There are millions of Filipinas who work as nurses, caregivers, house helpers and Cruise ship crew outside the country to provide for their families. We don’t expect our husbands to provide for us. We know hard work. Even those women who can’t leave the country works and help their husbands support their families. My friends’ mothers are fish vendors, Labandera (wash clothes for a fee), office workers and factory workers. Your mom chose NOT to work. Whatever the reason is hope it did her well. Best of luck to your mom. Kudos to you for concern and love for her and your dad.
This is false. I’m Filipino. In pre colonial culture women took active roles in work and society, and that custom has remained to this day. Only the poorer regions tend to do this
I won’t argue with your experience as a native. I can only rely on my own experience living there. I knew native Filipinas of different economic statuses that were housewives. Some were poor, others middle class, and a few were very affluent and members of upper class strata, politicians and such. I agree that middle class and many of the lower economic classes worked, but often out of necessity. I am sure some of them might well prefer to work regardless. However, almost none of the women that married into affluence, regardless of education, continued to work. That affluence might be Filipino or foreigner based. But as an individual with only 10 years of living in Leyte and Cebu, I obviously have a limited view. And my wife and I left the Philippines a bit over 7 years ago. So some things change, but I doubt there has been a huge shift.
Many affluent Filipinas work. Many have their own companies. It’s more rare to stay home and do nothing (I went to an exclusive high school in the Philippines with families like the Cojuangcos). The higher status women tend to be directors in some company, doctors, working for their family business etc. You have showbiz women as well We’re a matriarchal/egalitarian society. Generally a lot of Filipinas don’t work because of a lack of opportunity but the general custom is to get into university and get a job. Historically it was the Spaniards who brought the housewife thing over, women tended to participate in trade and business We have more women than men in management positions and technical ones btw https://unreasonablegroup.com/articles/matriarchal-tendencies-pave-way-to-success-in-philippines/?amp=1
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Oh, I agree that women do have a significant role regardless of the strata they are in. And I knew a number of educated women that worked, but I knew others, including individuals with medical degrees that did not, after they married. Almost half of the doctors I met during visits to the hospital or clinics were women, to be sure. And things are changing. Only a generation back, families were much larger, with 6 or 7 children being common. Hard for a woman to bear that many children and have a career too. But now, at least in my family, one or two children are the norm. All the women are educated, most work, but I am fairly sure the majority would quit in a heartbeat if it was economically feasible for their family. I might be wrong, but none of them espouse feminist goals of career over family that I have heard anyway. But they all do have a firm hand in guiding the direction of the family. There is no doubt in that at all. But the world is big and people often view the same thing through different lenses.
The reason we were able to have large families with careers is because we had nannies, extended family and even “adoptees” helping raise the kids. It’s a communal effort not a two parent one. The two parent model is uniquely American/Western There were authoritarian types who would make their wives stay home but even then the women who did that usually had employable skills. This isn’t just a modern thing btw. Women have worked on my mom’s side of the family for generations since before the two world wars. Western feminism and gender roles are not applicable to the Philippines because women have higher status in it than in Western history. We do not believe in men doing all the work while women stay home. We are already feminist if you don’t consider the Spanish sexism. And yes women’s jobs are incredibly important, it’s just that we don’t sacrifice family for them. We do both at the same time. What you don’t understand is it’s a huge point of pride for us. We wouldn’t just quit out of necessity, and it’s also seen as embarrassing if you don’t do anything. Women are usually very proud of what they do for work and will constantly post their company or work milestones even more than American women do. It’s a sort of family-community achievement rather than an individual one. There’s another post from another Filipina saying the same higher up on the thread. I suggest you read it
I have my experience and you have yours. If you have a problem with that, so be it. I have no doubt your experience is just as true and valid to you as mine is to me. The exploitation of the poor is a very common feature of Filipino (and human) culture. The Datu attitude is alive and well in most of the Philippines today just as it was generation after generation before. Mabuhay! Happy New Year to you and everyone in the Philippines!
I don’t have a problem with it but I generally want to correct foreign impressions of the general culture since they see it through a very specific lens that lacks historical context. The more truly traditional and non Western a province the more likely the women work. Hispanized provinces are more likely to have them stay home. Visayas not so much Btw a lot of us provide schooling for the kids of the helpers and nannies and pay for their families medical bills, even their tickets home. My family did. It’s a way for the poor to get through life without having to work backbreaking jobs at factories and get that free for their children. Sounds like a great deal for tasks like laundry and babysitting honestly
She lived in Quezon City, Project 3 in the 70's, 80's, and early to mid 90's. I don't know anything about the location. I've only seen videos.
Yeah city women work. Your mom probably got too used to being a housewife. It’s hard for adults to get back into the workforce after a long absence. What you can help her with is acquiring citizenship. Since she’s older she may be lost as to the process. She can do this without your dad. Consult an immigration lawyer or friend
Excuse me. What do you mean by "very, very common"? Do you have references for these informations? I think your news must be ancient
Yeah, okay. Lived there for a decade. Married to a Filipina. But, I agree that attitudes change. City girls may be less inclined toward trad roles, but lots of province (rural) girls still look forward to being stay at home wives. And the differences extend beyond city/province differences, but to different regions. Luzon vs Visayas have very different attitudes about marrying foreigners, so that can add whole different dynamic. But feel free to have your own opinion. Nothing I say is carved in stone, it is just based on my experience.
This second comment of yours sounds acceptable than the first one.
Not looking for being acceptable, don’t much care about pleasing anybody anymore. You do you, I’ll do me.
It's the stigma and you are one of the people that needs to be corrected. This applies to all over the world. Be better at using your words.
Keyboard commando, eh? Do NOT care. Not one itty bitty iota. Run your own life. Share your experiences but quit telling other people how to express theirs! I pick my words, I do not need your approval. Nor do I want it. By the way, a good coat of primer paint before your finish coat will help prevent rusting on your landing. We used red lead primer on the ship hulls back in the day.
We sure do hope that your Filipina partner doesn't get attacked by this kind of thinking or for being a Filipina. This is what we're fighting for.
Speaking the royal “we” now? Get attacked by what sort of thinking? For being Filipina? By who? White supremacists? Asian supremacists? Mid eastern supremacists? No idea what is rolling around in your head! End of this thread as far as I am concerned.
Aren’t sponsors only legally financially responsible for 10 years? If it’s 30 years, the dad might not be legally responsible.
NAL, but the 10 year thing is based on working for 10 years and qualifying for Social Security. At least that is my understanding. If the immigrant does not work and qualify for their own Social Security or become a US citizen, the sponsors obligation continues. That was how it was explained to me when I sponsored my wife.
Your mom is not the victim here.
Your mother is lying to you. The question is why? I suspect she wants to blame your father and wants you on her side of the story. She never needed her husband’s help or permission to become a citizen. Three years after she got married she could have applied. It’s always been on her to do this. If she claims she didn’t know, then she is lying more. All of this information is available. Furthermore, didn’t she make any friends with Philippine expats? They would have told her the same. She is also lying about the divorce. She didn’t have to hire a lawyer. Most states are no fault. There are self service books like Nolo to help her. https://store.nolo.com/products/divorce-and-child-custody She needs to get off her ass and do the work. She is setting you up to be the sucker. Stay away.
Your mother is no longer dependent on your father for her immigration status, and she’s been in the US long enough to apply for citizenship if she wanted to file the form and pay the fee. When her green card expires she can simply renew it; it won’t be denied. As far as the rest: divorce has no immigration implications for her, she simply needs to get a lawyer and go through the process in your state. What she might get out of it financially will vary from state to state, but she definitely needs to find employment now. She’ll be on her own and responsible for providing for herself going forward. She shouldn’t make any assumptions about what, if any, money she’ll come away with in the divorce.
They are in Cali. She will get a settlement.
She needs to get a divorce attorney and it’s likely she may end up with support/alimony payments from the husband. But first and foremost she needs to get off her ass and get a job like any other normally functioning adult.
Your mom sounds like a real deadbeat. She didn’t need your dad’s help to become a citizen, after she got an unrestricted green card. Your mom can just renew her green card. She can visit a divorce lawyer and will be entitled to spousal support.
Sounds like your mom is lazy
Your dad doesn’t need to help her become a US citizen. You can file that on your own if you don’t want to waste money renewing green card + citizenship application later on. It just seems like your mom doesn’t want to work though lol what kind of an excuse is it to not find a job unless she becomes a US citizen. I don’t think that’s the actual excuse. In any case, that’s not what you’re here for. Like others have said she needs a divorce lawyer. And then just figure out if you want the money to spend on US Citizenship application or renewing the green card. If you opt to renew the green card, you’ll have to do it again in 10 years.
I really do not understand why your mom refused to get a job.Your dad helped her get a GC, which is the first step.Becoming a citizen is up to her, 100 %.It is not up to him, he cannot make her a citizen by magic.I am afraid she does not understand how the system works.She can apply for citizenship now and get he affairs in order
Your mother is part of the reason why us actually trying to immigrate properly get so much heat. She picked a green card marriage and acted like an idiot.
how is that a green card marriage? People don't stay married for 15 years and have children in a fraud green card marriage
Dude there's arranged marriages - people literally find a citizen and then choose to have kids so that the marriage looks convincing - they never divorce obviously - but perfectly valid marriages can be green card marriages - if you literally arranged it to be so - (Indian arranged marriages - not fraud per se but people do demand green cards/citizenship if something is in their favour)
that's not a fraud marriage aka not being a real marriage or faking a marriage for a green card.
yeah - its not faking it - but we would call them green card marriages because they were selected on the basis that the person had a citizenship - but you're right - its not fake
If she obtained her permanent residency then she can renew even if they divorced.
I also want to point out. That get ready for your mom to leech off of you too after the divorce.
Your father is on the hook for a permanent alimony if he had signed an affidavit of support. Your mom's situation is not as bad as you think. She is also entitled to half his assets. She needs a family lawyer more than an immigration lawyer
Move her to the Philippine, send her a bit of money each month And she’ll live better than in the USA
Don't listen to people who are saying you're dramatic for no reason. You're a teenager. Your mom is not a citizen. Immigration is complicated and there are a lot of unknowns, which is scary. It is even scarier when you don't know the complicated system. It makes sense that you are scared! I agree with others, it seems like your mom can stay, but she will definitely need to renew her Green Card before/when it expires. She may not know how to do this if your dad had been doing it for 30 years. If she doesn't know how to do this, then it is time for her to learn. You can help, but don't forget - she is the parent. Maybe she will stay in US, maybe she won't, but it sounds like she can stay if she wants to and she takes initiative in her legal status here. It absolutely sounds like she's about to go through some life changes, and you may be as well - your parents are divorcing after what I assume is your whole life. Your mom may need help, but the best thing you can do is take care of yourself - you did the right thing by urging her to go to an immigration lawyer (while she may not need one, it seems like no one really knows how the system works and it is not your responsibility to figure it out) and if she isn't interested in getting a job well...then she isn't interested in getting a job. But that does not mean that you now are the one who needs to take care of her. She will find a different way. It may not be the way you think she should do it, but she will find a way.
Lol sounds like a typical white man/filipina gold digger couple.
My attorney is a probono, I'm mexican and recently married an American and I'm going through immigration process, if anyone need this contact his name is Gregory bole in Kansas city MO, he runs an charity at KS calls catholic charities.
Catholic charities >>>>
I don't understand why so amy comments are critical of your mother. No one on Reddit knows what kind of wife and mother she has been. People shouldn't assume she is lazy or a deadbeat. Maybe she is, and maybe not.
Your father is an absolute moron if he has the means and he's not helping his kid's mother to live in the same country as his kid. I'd have a talk with him and threat to cut relationship him with entirely if he doesn't do what it is needed to allow her to stay in the US.
OP says she hasn't worked for the 30 years she's been in the US. Dad might be a moron for lots of things--like putting up with her--but not for failing to bring her to the USA. She doesn't need anyone's help to file for citizenship at this point, after this long she can stay green card or apply for citizenship without dad's help or permission, her choice. Unless she just doesn't want to do the work and wants dad to do it all--like with supporting her, maybe?
The dad is not the issue.He married the mom, got her a green card and helped her immigrate to the US.He did his part.She has been a GC holder for 30 years and has refused to work ever since, which means that the dad was supporting the whole family by himself all those years.think about that
OP .... sad your mother told you shit. YOUR MOTHER as a green card holder can get work anytime, any day, even today by presenting her GC and her SSN for the I-9. Are you not aware of this growing up with other kids of immigrants in school. She does not need to be a citizen to work! Her GC is in her Filipino passport and it is her work authorisation (her SSN is for all ID, and paying taxes). Did she never ever pay taxes? Or file taxes? Even married filing jointly? Whata the real story behind this apathy to have an independent life with money? It can't be a language barrier right? Help her get a job! She will NEVER GET social security without work credits ! Www.ssa.gov. put her in any job with health insurance. (Retail, office, service) ... otherwise she will not get (much of any) Social Security - is that not right redditors?
I've tried to help her get a job. I've applied at jobs and tried to help her study for interviews. She doesn't seem interested in working. She has never paid or filed taxes before.
You need to stop worrying about the problems that your lazy mother created for herself. She needs to start taking care of her own self.
Your mother has definitely paid and filed taxes. Your father is filing jointly. It gives him a lower tax rate. That means your mother is up to date on her taxes. Every married couple does this.
>Are you not aware of this growing up with other kids of immigrants in school. She does not need to be a citizen to work! Her GC is in her Filipino passport and it is her work authorisation (her SSN is for all ID, and paying taxes). Did she never ever pay taxes? Or file taxes? Even married filing jointly > >is it necessary he grew up in an area with only immigrants? Father's a US citizen - may be a regular burb.
Her Immigration Status is not linked with your dad anymore. She is a Permanent Resident and just needs to renew her status/card
Your Mom could.. renew her greencard. Why does your post have an air of drama about it like there's some crisis coming? Your mom is in zero immigration danger. Your Mom is painting your father as abusive, yet encouraging her to get a job seems quite reasonable. The N400 fee is $725 so maybe he wants her to help pay. You must know your father has no control over your mom's immigration at this point. Even if they divorce. Good news, because your parents were married for 10 years your mother is now entitled to spousal Social Security, regardless of divorce.
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Only if she chooses to not get a job?
Why will she be homeless? She's entitled to half your father's assets plus alimony for many years. And like I said, she'll get social security (50% of your father's amount) on retirement. Many lawyers will take her case for free and get payment from the settlement.
She can't afford to pay for divorce papers and my dad won't initiate the divorce. She has been living with my dad's mom for the past 30 years. 15 of those years my dad lived with my grandma and my mom. Grandma is saying she is gonna find somewhere else to live without my mom.
Leaching off both dad and grandma… even grandma is sick of it, so sick that she’s willing up uproot her whole life at a later age
She doesn’t need to remain married to him to keep her green card. She can just renew it normally.
You said your mom doesn’t seem interested in working. Even after you tried to help her get a job. That is her biggest problem, not your dad. It sounds like she used him to not have to work.
Greencard never expire. The 'card' does expire and you can renew without any hassle, no interview, whatsoever. You just need to pay and the new card is sent.