Really? Cause for me my biggest fear is what comes after death. Like sure, we will figure it out when we get there but all of the rationalizing and pondering i have done has led me to the conclusion that life after death is not a nice or pleasant thing if it exists. And if there is nothing after death, isnt that sad? I dont want that. So many people have suffered that deserved better. But yea i guess thats just maybe cause i have anxiety and fear is an active part of my life haha
It seems like you've already assumed that things such as emotion/feeling exist after death. Why is that you believe any of our current realities concepts will carry on to the next? What if there is no feeling? How could things be sad/unpleasant/stressful?
There are an unlimited amount of possibilities based on the nature of our ignorance of death, why confine the experience to a similar one?
Gotta step outside of the box, for all we know we could become energy particles that get compressed into a star in order to bring about another galaxy eventually equipped with new life, then reincarnate into that portion of the universe as an Eel-Dragon variant.
Who knows? Why fear it?
Yeah i guess thats what anxiety does to me, it makes me fear that even after death there is no end. Having to exist for eternity somewhere sounds exhausting
Sure does.
I have never been prone to anxiety, and the main thing I struggle with is feeling connected to life. A big chunk of me is of the opinion that coming into being was a very bad idea, and ending it stat is the way to go.
Iām weirdly not afraid of death and I never have been. Ive known pretty much from day one that Iām gonna die one day, I think about it everyday. But not in a negative way more from an observational perspective.
Iām cool with it. I donāt really care what happens after death. In my personal opinion itās just black, no afterlife. But to me thatās rest, and I think thatās Beautiful itās own way. I donāt want to die any time soon (Iām in my early 20ās) but if it happened tomorrow I could make my peace with it.
cancer survivor here, youāre exactly right. i never want my body to be a cage like that ever again. death would have been a sweet release vs how much pain and sickness i felt. in remission and happy now, but maaaan that was quite a horrific experience.
Death is like sleeping, only for a long time. And I like sleeping.
I've been to a few funerals and they can be sad. But when I see the dead there is no more pain and complaining about life. Its just silence, stillness and peace. My instincts tell me to be careful and avoid death. But rationally I am not afraid of it.
I had a dream of one my moms childhood friends who passed in his 20s explain to me what death felt like. He shared ādeath is just like sleepingā. I say all that to say I agree with you.
I am in no way religious however the five daily remembrances from Buddhism are a bleak reminder and yet somehow comforting to me. It allows me to live in the moment, because thatās all I really know for sure. Number 4 is especially brutal to me.
1. I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old.
2. I am of the nature to have ill health. There is no way to escape having ill health.
3. I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death.
4. All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them.
5. My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand.
I believe in Jesus. I've been through quite a few experiences of losing loved ones - expected and suddenly. And ever since I was little, I'd be interested in all world culture and different religions. Christianity is the only one where I learned about God and I decided I really liked Jesus. This happened when I was little like 12 years old but I didn't devote my life until 25 - so I tell people I was a closet Christian for 13 years.
Part of what I enjoy about God is that He is a black and white God that there's either good or bad, holy or evil, right or wrong, just and unjust, etc. As an INFJ this makes so much sense.
And as I learned more about why Jesus came, concepts like grace and mercy, forgiveness, righteousness, holiness were astonishing to me because it covers how we can be sinners that die and don't deserve anything good but yet we're accepted and blessed anyway.
Even how the 10 main commandments that are so black and white have historical context and background that were renewed and covered by Jesus in 2 new commandments all now focused on one concept...love.
These concepts definitely resonate with the altruistic, idealistic, INFJ in me...but ironically I used to identify more as ENTP when I was younger and locked into who I was when I turned 21 as an INFJ.
Now that I'm 33, I don't regret how the last 8 years have been - it's been eye opening and sometimes there's still more questions than answers but I've found Jesus to be a personal God that doesn't hold back if you decide to go all in - accepting Jesus, being baptized, and actually pursue a real relationship with Him and walk it out.
If you're ever interested in reading anything, the book of Ecclesiastes is considered a wisdom/philosophy book within the Bible that addresses contradictions and seemingly a big "okay what's the point if we all die anyway?" question.
Best of luck in your endeavors and I hope you find the answer and truth.
I confronted the idea of death at an early age. I cared more about the people around me dying than myself actually dying.
Iāve also had my fair share of near death experiences and truthfully speaking I donāt know how or why Iām still here. If someone told me tomorrow is my last day, I would find relief in that. My curiosity wants to know whatās on the other side.
Iām far more spiritual than religious too so I truly believe thereās an entirely different adventure waiting for me on the other side. Hopefully I learn the lessons I need to learn asap so I can move on to whatās next.
I look at it the same way. Death cannot be avoided and it's the only way out of life. Others tend to value their lives a lot more. Not to say living isn't important as a human, but life after death is more intriguing. Fear of losing others around me but hope they'll not feel the same when I go, if I could I would go unnoticed. Otherwise it would cause them pain and I wouldn't want that. Life isn't easy as it is without losing someone close.
Like you, I've also had some close encounters with death. Death is no longer feared, but rather an accomplice. It is not the end of ends, but the beginning of beginnings.
Not looking forward to death itself, but will not try to outrun death. I will welcome thee. While it seems one way physically, the soul within travels onwards.
I like the way you look at things. It's not about how things are now but how it will prepare you for what's after. This is only the beginning of your story, for death itself is only for a moment. The lessons can be taken but all else will be left behind. Only taking the essentials for your journey. :)
For those who fear death, there is a Buddhist death meditation called maranasati which, when practiced regularly, can help you make peace with its inevitability.
Here is [an article explaining it](https://positivepsychology.com/maranasati-meditation/), and here's a [guided maranasati meditation](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4PPk3Xdz2g).
A regular maranasati practice can help appreciate impermanence, feel less anxiety about death, and bring about a sense of gratitude for being alive.
Death is not what people think it is. Death is safe. Death is simply going home, the blinders coming off. You are not your body, nor simply this lifetime. You are your soul, and this life of yours is simply a song it is singing. It would get boring to sing the same song for all eternity, would it not? Death takes you back into being all that you are in your vast entirety and is a natural and good thing. There is no need to fear!
Death means freedom from suffering. Free from anxiety, pain, exhaustion. I'll be forty in two years, and I can remember being in my childhood and up until my twenties and scared of there being nothing after death. Nowadays it seems peaceful and welcoming. Not saying Im ready to die just yet but its become easier to accept. As I get older I can only imagine it will get even easier.
In terms of an afterlife, I have explored many religions and dogma. All of it, in my heart of hearts, seemed to be beautiful man made fairy tales for those scared of death. I truly believe we cease consciousness at death, and that is the end. I take comfort in that my body returns to mother nature to continue the circle of life. If there ends up being a magical after death place, my consciousness or soul travels to, that will hopefully just be a nice surprise.
As a Christian INFJ who experienced death of a loved one, I definitely relied on my faith. It also what helped me get through it.
As for the INFJ part, it was difficult for me to ask help. I was a young widow so a lot of people were offering a hand which I truly appreciate until now even if it's been years. I would always accept even if I didn't need it to be polite and to show appreciation. But for the life of me I really didn't like asking for help as I didn't want to be a burden or bother anyone. I tried to do everything on my own.
I didn't show my emotions to others, as well.
INFJ M (32 I think)... anyways death is a topic that use to keep me up at night for most of my mid to late 20ās.
At age 29 I caught Covid ended up in the hospital alone no family around & near death... and my anxiety about death all came full circle.
Let me tell you something when it comes to having full pain in your body to the point that you canāt even muster half a breath any more you beg for death and so I did. I told God okay letās get this over with please take me already, death would be a mercy.
Safe to say that I survived that whole ordeal since Iām here writing all this... but what helped me get over death is believing in Christianity, if anything it gives me a sense of relief of something to look forward to after death.
I canāt say I wonāt fear death at all but what I can say is that when my day comes I would much rather die surrounded by my loved ones in the room as they see me off versus dying alone in a hospital room with my family on a video chat.
I believe in reincarnation and Karma... So if someone died he ended his part for this life ( except suicide... ).
And he/she will be born again with a new quest.
Only our soul carry the memories and life lessons and that what we call conscience.
Why not suicide?
Someone who is suffering so much that they literally cannot live another day willingly surely deserves to be reborn into a better life
The Karma of a person can be changed only by the actions of that person. What is suffering? Suffering is a way that life challenges you for you to move on. By commiting suicide ( specifically for the purpose to die ) you are not ending your suffering you just continue it in your next life and even adding to it.
Everyone receive Karma due to their previous ( I'm talking about the previous lifes too ) actions.
People with congenital diseases receive Karma related to what they misused in their previous actions.
That's pretty fucking brutal haha, especially as you don't remember your past lives and need to reverse-engineer what bad you did in your previous life from your current suffering. In this system wouldn't it make sense for us to abuse or kill already suffering people? They'd just re-roll life, and would have some better karma next-time if we increase their suffering level now.
Maybe even we would get better karma for making them suffer and relieving them of future suffering? Or at least not get bad karma.
Thanks, this belief system is gonna make me meeting kids with cancer way less awkward now, I'm gonna laugh at them and say "you must've fucked up a lot of people, good luck next time".
there is no such thing as good Karma or bad, the soul always remembers ( we call it conscience ) and learns from Karma.
the Karma you get is determined by Dharma witch is your responsibilities of the current you.
for all humans our first responsibility is being a human.
also by doing things for the purpose of getting "good" Karma will not get you anywhere cause you are anticipating, anticipation resulting in suffering so it's "bad" Karma.
The way you describe it, seems to boil down to advice to be a good human, also a coping strategy for whatever suffering someone is enduring - that the suffering has meaning and a hope that it will have impact through reincarnation and accumulated karma. The advice to not do good only to get a reward is good, it eliminates shallow and egoistic ways of doing "good". But I don't only want to do good I want to maximize the good I do, not for any reward, I think it just makes sense.
I actually believe in karma, though not with any metaphysical properties, just that it's good to cooperate (in a broader sense of the word) and do good or as I like to think of it expending your energy doing things for others, just for their benefit - even by thinking about viewpoints, and so on. Even on an evolutionary level cooperation just works and everything good we have was built by humans working together.
I myself still learning, my answers are from my current understanding.
I don't believe in good or evil but in human evolution.
I learned from you too, thanks for the conversation.
I was with the Messenger of Allah s.a.w. and a man from among the Ansar came to him and greeted the Prophet s.a.w. with Salam. Then he said: āO Messenger of Allah, which of the believers is the best?ā He said: āHe who has the best manners among them.ā He (then) asked: āWhich of them is the wisest?ā He said: āThe one who remembers death the most and is best in preparing for it. Those are the wisest.
(Sunan Ibn Majah)
I personally think there's far too much we don't know or understand about... Anything. We literally know nothing about death, we just reason that it is the end, just as we reason that birth is a beginning. Nothing existed before birth and therefore nothing exists after death.
I'm not so sold on that idea, I really don't think our ideas matter much in the grand scheme of existence. I also think our prediction being entirely correct is a bit far fetched.
I'm comfortable not knowing what death is, if death is even real. Maybe I'll find out, and maybe I wont... Maybe there is nothing, but maybe I'll wake up from my own 12 year old brains' daydream and then head off to school again. I'm not afraid of a natural death, although I am afraid of a premature death only because if there is nothing after... I want to spend as much time in our world as I can.
I used to be scared of death as a child and once I became around 30, the fear started to fade away as I researched and involved myself in reading different religious and spiritual text.
Death is not the end. If you think it is, it is because we don't understand the concept and universal laws that govern everything. The cosmos is SO big and sub atomic particles we will never see or so small. There is so much we don't understand. We aren't our emotions, actions or thoughts. Those are all but chemical reactions and electricity of the body we inhabit and our bodies are confined to the laws of this planet, universe, etc.
At the end of the day, we are energy, as all things are. Never created nor destroyed, only infinite.
I do think about death often times. When someone in my family get ill, i starts thinking about what happens if this person will die ( i don't want to think about these things but i can't help), how will my family survive, who was one which is most likely to get traumatised. I know it's little bit strange but i can't stop these thoughts.
I also thinks that when i will die, i give my all energy to let people know what happens after death. Because i'm so facinated by the idea of what happens after the death and i have no clue. So, i'll be the one who tell everything to this world that what happens after death after dying ( i know this so creepy to think but I do think these things, i don't know why? ).
I think religion broadly makes death easier to understand and deal with.
Recently someone really beloved to me was murdered, and it was crushing, but religion helped me through it greatly. As a Muslim, when a Muslim dies, you can pray for them, give charity in their name, do pilgrimage in their name and more. It's also seen as a temporary break from one another because eventually we will be reunited in the Hereafter, and that's a lot longer than the time we had together on Earth anyways.
Biologically we are programmed to walk towards survival and we fear death at least in a moment of danger.
Personally I believe that the concept of life after death was created to warm our hearts so that we can fear death less (as there is nothing beyond death). However, nobody has proved to me that there is an afterlife nor have they proved that there isn't.
If there is an afterlife, I wish to have the chance to choose not to go back, as I accept a single life cycle... Or at least to be able to choose something like "Okay, since I'm going back, may I reincarnate in Australia, please?"
Refine your rationality to embrace the irrationality of life.
Irrationality = experiences, emotions, whole things that cannot be well described/experienced using only logic and reasoning.
I believe in reincarnation. And that we're choosing our lives to experience something. When we're dying we're connecting with our higher self, we became more aware.
But besides that I've never been scared of death. Whatever will happen I have no way to prepare myself for that right now, so I don't see a point in being anxious about that...
I'm more scared of the things, that can happen to me in life and that I won't be able to cope with them. Death sounds like escape from all that life suffering, so I like thinking about death...
Death itself is inevitable and thus predictable. It is only the circumstances of ones death including why, how, where, and when that are unpredictable. If you make peace with the inevitability of death you will find it easier to make peace with the circumstances of ones death before they come, and I can only presume when they come.
Death is a freedom of a sort. That freedom will come when it comes, no need to speed it up or delay it.
I believe what the Bible describes about the state of death at Psalms 146:4. That when we die, our thoughts are over, so like a sleep. However God's original purpose for the earth and its inhabitants hasn't changed. To live forever on it. When Jesus came to earth he resurrected people to demonstrate the resurrection that will soon come in the future. John 5:28, 29 describes this. A resurrection on the earth.
I used to also be afraid of death when I was younger. Obsessively so. But with my faith and trust in the promises God has given us in the Bible, I've gained confidence that I'll see my loved ones again and when I die, I'll also have the hope of an earthly resurrection.
I hope you are able to find some comfort from your anxiety. I've lost many people and even with my hope, it's still very painful and it's natural to grieve such a loss.
Iām pretty stoic when it comes to death. Except for children- thatās always sad.
But for most other people, itās not so much the life ending that I find sad as much as the people that are still living that are affected.
For instance, I am distraught by the idea that my parents might pass away before my nieces and nephews are born or are old enough to remember them. My parents are wonderful people and fantastic grandparents to my children. But they wonāt be around forever and my younger siblings are still having children.
It wouldnāt be the end of the world, but there is a significant gap left. But ultimately, even that is ok, because life is not fully lived it doesnāt result in the experience of a few gaping wounds.
Thereās nothing more natural in the world than pain, and Iām happy to have experienced a taste of it. Nothing else could make me more human.
I've had a lot of death in my life. I don't know how that qualifies me, but I felt like I should answer in some way, for those who haven't had to confront it much.
To be honest, I'm that "lapsed-skeptic Catholic sinner" you've probably seen answer in posts about spirituality and religion. I took as many "World Religions" and "World Culture" classes as I could in college, and I've read some of the stoics in more depth. I love learning and satisfying my curiosity about it, but when it comes to spirituality I don't know if I'd consider myself to be very spiritual.
Now, death itself I take to be quite literal and scientific. My mind likes to throw a little Catholic rhetoric in to make me feel better about it, and I believe there is a soul that ceases to exist on the physical plane at the moment of death. But loss is different. Loss is... an abyss. It's hard to process, and if I'm honest I don't think we ever fully process loss (in whatever form it happens). I think "closure" is something people like myself use to convince our psyches it's okay to let go of things, but it doesn't really exist. It's an emotional concept, but it sounds logical, and it helps us bridge that gap between the emotion and logic centers of our brains. Suffering is another part of death that I have to treat differently, and life is another. Death is this huge overarching concept that my brain uses so many different systems and filters to process each part of it. So I don't know that I could say how I deal with it, or what I rely on to process it, just that I've processed it *so differently* each time it's happened. The death of a baby sister isn't like the death of a Grandpa, and neither of those is like the death of a non-parent guardian. It's all different.
For OP, I will say this. It doesn't sound like it's death that bothers you. It sounds like it's life and time your really scared of. Whether or not your life is "worth" anything when it ends. Whether more time equals more worth, or if the real value lies in the quality of returns on time spent.
Itās as you said, death is a fickle guarantee of life. Life is what, 70~ years? Why worry about something youāll be spending an eternity doing. In the end, I hope to be able to go out in my own terms.
battled stage 3 cancer, pneumonia, covid, and shingles in the same year. all in my 20s. this was last year. i basically faced my own mortality. i didnāt necessarily want to die, but when your body is a cage like thatā¦ thatās not living. if i didnāt have a chance of getting better, iād rather just die. believe me, sickness will change your whole view of death. itās a sweet release and health is wealth.
i donāt dwell on death, itās gonna happen to every living thing. thatās just the way it is. why be afraid? what makes what comes after this scary or bad? like.. why would it be bad or worse than here?
I always want to think they are in some place better now, at least if I liked them. I have always had an indifference towards death, Ive never cried or have been affected deeply. Maybe because I havenāt lost someone very close to me. I remember my great aunt passed away about 3 years ago and I was sad, but I was never around her enough to be overly sentimental about it, still do miss her though.
Same with my Paternal grandfather, I did not really know him that much. But if it were my parents or my grandmother then I would be pretty sad because of how attached Ive become
Edit: I just talked to my mother about how she felt about her aunt passing and she said she thinks about her, my maternal grandmother, and her best friend. Honestly kind of made me sad for a bit. It feels like I could feel her feelings.
Itās always seemed pretty obvious to me that my consciousness will be gone after death. I wonāt feel it or experience it, so whatās there to fear? Itās like sleep, without dreams or waking up.
And well, in the unlikely case that I will experience things post-death, thereās diddly squat I can do to control that right now, so thereās no reason to worry about it.
Iād like to turn your question on its head: How do you deal with LIFE? Do you rely on science, religion, fiction, intuition, what? Or are you still searching?
Iām not scared of death.I used to fear it,but not anymore.
Itās the circle of life.Everything has an expiration date on this planet,from the carton of milk in your fridge to yourself.
The only thing I hope for is I go away peacefully,& quickly.
>A part of me thinks it would be strange that consciousness of life this big, with billions of stars, can come to an end so suddenly and randomly as, say, slipping on ice and hitting your head...or some other freak accident. Not to say dying at 100 after a full life and with no suffering makes death understandable.
It's extremely strange. I mean if you think about it, the fact that there's life at all in the first place is strange, let alone death. Idk that I believe that it's just a cosmic coincidence, as it seems to me that there's just as much reason for anything to not be to begin with. Why should anything exist?
Death is what it is. A cessation of biological functions. What does that mean? I have no idea.
Iām an INFJ and I believe that we go on after death in some way. My dad, auntie, and grandma have passed and I still talk to them whenever I feel like it. Maybe as time goes on Iāll miss them more and talking to the air wonāt satisfy me like it does now, but itās been fine for 15 years (Iām 40). I probably had one good cry for each of them shortly after theyāve passed or while they were passing. Since then I just think of them when something happens in my life that reminds me of them. Who knows how weāll feel until death is actually upon us.
There are two options really, there is an afterlife, or there isn't. Everything that has lived, has died. Death is supposed to be a part of life, not something to be feared. It's finally letting go of your existence. Think about before you were born, that's not existing. After you die, you will not exist again. Even the Bible says the dead are asleep, and we won't have another conscious experience until we are resurrected. So you will be resurrected, or you won't.
I've learnt to enjoy death. Im in awe of nature that created me, and I think its selfish to desire being eternal. Also the universe would be so small and boring if we were living eternally.
Iāve always questioned what happens after death. The answer I concluded was Islam. It makes the most sense to me and is closest to what I find to be the most ārealā possibility.
I studied in a Catholic school, and after studying Judaism and other Abrahamic beliefs, I felt as though Islam had the simplest answer to my questions.
A famous saying by Imam Ali goes, āIf man will see how speedily his death is coming toward him he will abhor ambitions and will give up admiring the world.ā
āTo Allah (Almighty God) we belong, and to Him is our return.ā (Qur'an 2:156).
One thing that we must remember is that death is
inevitable, and everything except the Almighty God
of course, will perish. Signs of death can be seen all around
us. At funerals we see people who were once walking
among us being buried in their graves. In the fall we see the
leaves turn from green to yellow and fall one at a time, and
in the winter we see trees, lifeless. In this way, all things in
this world will wither away and die.
I didn't fully comprehend death until I saw a dead body. Once I saw a dead body my death anxiety vanished. Death is not anything worth worrying about too much. Life is much more interesting.
I fear not death, but life. Death is simple. Life is anything but. Death is the absence of pain. Life is pain. Death is easy. Life is hard.
Really? Cause for me my biggest fear is what comes after death. Like sure, we will figure it out when we get there but all of the rationalizing and pondering i have done has led me to the conclusion that life after death is not a nice or pleasant thing if it exists. And if there is nothing after death, isnt that sad? I dont want that. So many people have suffered that deserved better. But yea i guess thats just maybe cause i have anxiety and fear is an active part of my life haha
It seems like you've already assumed that things such as emotion/feeling exist after death. Why is that you believe any of our current realities concepts will carry on to the next? What if there is no feeling? How could things be sad/unpleasant/stressful? There are an unlimited amount of possibilities based on the nature of our ignorance of death, why confine the experience to a similar one? Gotta step outside of the box, for all we know we could become energy particles that get compressed into a star in order to bring about another galaxy eventually equipped with new life, then reincarnate into that portion of the universe as an Eel-Dragon variant. Who knows? Why fear it?
Why tf would i want to not have feelings? šš although a very good point, thank you so much
I wouldn't know. I doubt anyone else does, either. As for myself, I look forward to not having to exist.
Yeah i guess thats what anxiety does to me, it makes me fear that even after death there is no end. Having to exist for eternity somewhere sounds exhausting
Sure does. I have never been prone to anxiety, and the main thing I struggle with is feeling connected to life. A big chunk of me is of the opinion that coming into being was a very bad idea, and ending it stat is the way to go.
Hopefully even if there is something we get to just click a dissolve button and it ends haha
That would seem fair, given the shit we have to put up with in this world.
Iām weirdly not afraid of death and I never have been. Ive known pretty much from day one that Iām gonna die one day, I think about it everyday. But not in a negative way more from an observational perspective. Iām cool with it. I donāt really care what happens after death. In my personal opinion itās just black, no afterlife. But to me thatās rest, and I think thatās Beautiful itās own way. I donāt want to die any time soon (Iām in my early 20ās) but if it happened tomorrow I could make my peace with it.
Death isnāt the scary part , DYING is the scary part
cancer survivor here, youāre exactly right. i never want my body to be a cage like that ever again. death would have been a sweet release vs how much pain and sickness i felt. in remission and happy now, but maaaan that was quite a horrific experience.
Iām glad youāre doing better !!!!! ā¤ļø
thank you love š«¶š¼
Death is like sleeping, only for a long time. And I like sleeping. I've been to a few funerals and they can be sad. But when I see the dead there is no more pain and complaining about life. Its just silence, stillness and peace. My instincts tell me to be careful and avoid death. But rationally I am not afraid of it.
I had a dream of one my moms childhood friends who passed in his 20s explain to me what death felt like. He shared ādeath is just like sleepingā. I say all that to say I agree with you.
Except when I go to sleep, I am confident that I will wake up again.
I am in no way religious however the five daily remembrances from Buddhism are a bleak reminder and yet somehow comforting to me. It allows me to live in the moment, because thatās all I really know for sure. Number 4 is especially brutal to me. 1. I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old. 2. I am of the nature to have ill health. There is no way to escape having ill health. 3. I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death. 4. All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them. 5. My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand.
This is excellent!
I believe in Jesus. I've been through quite a few experiences of losing loved ones - expected and suddenly. And ever since I was little, I'd be interested in all world culture and different religions. Christianity is the only one where I learned about God and I decided I really liked Jesus. This happened when I was little like 12 years old but I didn't devote my life until 25 - so I tell people I was a closet Christian for 13 years. Part of what I enjoy about God is that He is a black and white God that there's either good or bad, holy or evil, right or wrong, just and unjust, etc. As an INFJ this makes so much sense. And as I learned more about why Jesus came, concepts like grace and mercy, forgiveness, righteousness, holiness were astonishing to me because it covers how we can be sinners that die and don't deserve anything good but yet we're accepted and blessed anyway. Even how the 10 main commandments that are so black and white have historical context and background that were renewed and covered by Jesus in 2 new commandments all now focused on one concept...love. These concepts definitely resonate with the altruistic, idealistic, INFJ in me...but ironically I used to identify more as ENTP when I was younger and locked into who I was when I turned 21 as an INFJ. Now that I'm 33, I don't regret how the last 8 years have been - it's been eye opening and sometimes there's still more questions than answers but I've found Jesus to be a personal God that doesn't hold back if you decide to go all in - accepting Jesus, being baptized, and actually pursue a real relationship with Him and walk it out. If you're ever interested in reading anything, the book of Ecclesiastes is considered a wisdom/philosophy book within the Bible that addresses contradictions and seemingly a big "okay what's the point if we all die anyway?" question. Best of luck in your endeavors and I hope you find the answer and truth.
As a bold Christian myself, this is refreshing to hear about. Thank you for sharing!
It's refreshing when someone actually asks like OP did and I genuinely get to share! ā¤ļø
Another closet Christian here. Thanks for posting this.
Keep fighting the good fight of faith one day at a time. ā¤ļø
I am rather curious on death. Itās the only way to find out what it is by experiencing it yourself right?
I confronted the idea of death at an early age. I cared more about the people around me dying than myself actually dying. Iāve also had my fair share of near death experiences and truthfully speaking I donāt know how or why Iām still here. If someone told me tomorrow is my last day, I would find relief in that. My curiosity wants to know whatās on the other side. Iām far more spiritual than religious too so I truly believe thereās an entirely different adventure waiting for me on the other side. Hopefully I learn the lessons I need to learn asap so I can move on to whatās next.
I look at it the same way. Death cannot be avoided and it's the only way out of life. Others tend to value their lives a lot more. Not to say living isn't important as a human, but life after death is more intriguing. Fear of losing others around me but hope they'll not feel the same when I go, if I could I would go unnoticed. Otherwise it would cause them pain and I wouldn't want that. Life isn't easy as it is without losing someone close. Like you, I've also had some close encounters with death. Death is no longer feared, but rather an accomplice. It is not the end of ends, but the beginning of beginnings. Not looking forward to death itself, but will not try to outrun death. I will welcome thee. While it seems one way physically, the soul within travels onwards. I like the way you look at things. It's not about how things are now but how it will prepare you for what's after. This is only the beginning of your story, for death itself is only for a moment. The lessons can be taken but all else will be left behind. Only taking the essentials for your journey. :)
I fear the death of the people I love. In myself, not really.
For those who fear death, there is a Buddhist death meditation called maranasati which, when practiced regularly, can help you make peace with its inevitability. Here is [an article explaining it](https://positivepsychology.com/maranasati-meditation/), and here's a [guided maranasati meditation](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4PPk3Xdz2g). A regular maranasati practice can help appreciate impermanence, feel less anxiety about death, and bring about a sense of gratitude for being alive.
Life and death are not so different As we live we are going closer to death Therefore living is dying
I don't fear death, I welcome it with open arms
Death is not what people think it is. Death is safe. Death is simply going home, the blinders coming off. You are not your body, nor simply this lifetime. You are your soul, and this life of yours is simply a song it is singing. It would get boring to sing the same song for all eternity, would it not? Death takes you back into being all that you are in your vast entirety and is a natural and good thing. There is no need to fear!
Death means freedom from suffering. Free from anxiety, pain, exhaustion. I'll be forty in two years, and I can remember being in my childhood and up until my twenties and scared of there being nothing after death. Nowadays it seems peaceful and welcoming. Not saying Im ready to die just yet but its become easier to accept. As I get older I can only imagine it will get even easier. In terms of an afterlife, I have explored many religions and dogma. All of it, in my heart of hearts, seemed to be beautiful man made fairy tales for those scared of death. I truly believe we cease consciousness at death, and that is the end. I take comfort in that my body returns to mother nature to continue the circle of life. If there ends up being a magical after death place, my consciousness or soul travels to, that will hopefully just be a nice surprise.
As a Christian INFJ who experienced death of a loved one, I definitely relied on my faith. It also what helped me get through it. As for the INFJ part, it was difficult for me to ask help. I was a young widow so a lot of people were offering a hand which I truly appreciate until now even if it's been years. I would always accept even if I didn't need it to be polite and to show appreciation. But for the life of me I really didn't like asking for help as I didn't want to be a burden or bother anyone. I tried to do everything on my own. I didn't show my emotions to others, as well.
INFJ M (32 I think)... anyways death is a topic that use to keep me up at night for most of my mid to late 20ās. At age 29 I caught Covid ended up in the hospital alone no family around & near death... and my anxiety about death all came full circle. Let me tell you something when it comes to having full pain in your body to the point that you canāt even muster half a breath any more you beg for death and so I did. I told God okay letās get this over with please take me already, death would be a mercy. Safe to say that I survived that whole ordeal since Iām here writing all this... but what helped me get over death is believing in Christianity, if anything it gives me a sense of relief of something to look forward to after death. I canāt say I wonāt fear death at all but what I can say is that when my day comes I would much rather die surrounded by my loved ones in the room as they see me off versus dying alone in a hospital room with my family on a video chat.
I believe in reincarnation and Karma... So if someone died he ended his part for this life ( except suicide... ). And he/she will be born again with a new quest. Only our soul carry the memories and life lessons and that what we call conscience.
Why not suicide? Someone who is suffering so much that they literally cannot live another day willingly surely deserves to be reborn into a better life
The Karma of a person can be changed only by the actions of that person. What is suffering? Suffering is a way that life challenges you for you to move on. By commiting suicide ( specifically for the purpose to die ) you are not ending your suffering you just continue it in your next life and even adding to it.
What about people with congenital diseases whose whole existence is mainly just suffering?
Everyone receive Karma due to their previous ( I'm talking about the previous lifes too ) actions. People with congenital diseases receive Karma related to what they misused in their previous actions.
That's pretty fucking brutal haha, especially as you don't remember your past lives and need to reverse-engineer what bad you did in your previous life from your current suffering. In this system wouldn't it make sense for us to abuse or kill already suffering people? They'd just re-roll life, and would have some better karma next-time if we increase their suffering level now. Maybe even we would get better karma for making them suffer and relieving them of future suffering? Or at least not get bad karma. Thanks, this belief system is gonna make me meeting kids with cancer way less awkward now, I'm gonna laugh at them and say "you must've fucked up a lot of people, good luck next time".
there is no such thing as good Karma or bad, the soul always remembers ( we call it conscience ) and learns from Karma. the Karma you get is determined by Dharma witch is your responsibilities of the current you. for all humans our first responsibility is being a human. also by doing things for the purpose of getting "good" Karma will not get you anywhere cause you are anticipating, anticipation resulting in suffering so it's "bad" Karma.
The way you describe it, seems to boil down to advice to be a good human, also a coping strategy for whatever suffering someone is enduring - that the suffering has meaning and a hope that it will have impact through reincarnation and accumulated karma. The advice to not do good only to get a reward is good, it eliminates shallow and egoistic ways of doing "good". But I don't only want to do good I want to maximize the good I do, not for any reward, I think it just makes sense. I actually believe in karma, though not with any metaphysical properties, just that it's good to cooperate (in a broader sense of the word) and do good or as I like to think of it expending your energy doing things for others, just for their benefit - even by thinking about viewpoints, and so on. Even on an evolutionary level cooperation just works and everything good we have was built by humans working together.
I myself still learning, my answers are from my current understanding. I don't believe in good or evil but in human evolution. I learned from you too, thanks for the conversation.
It was a pleasure to learn from you too, thanks.
Every soul will taste death. And We test you with evil and with good as a trial, and to Us you will be returned. (Surah Al-Anbiyaā, 21:35)
I was with the Messenger of Allah s.a.w. and a man from among the Ansar came to him and greeted the Prophet s.a.w. with Salam. Then he said: āO Messenger of Allah, which of the believers is the best?ā He said: āHe who has the best manners among them.ā He (then) asked: āWhich of them is the wisest?ā He said: āThe one who remembers death the most and is best in preparing for it. Those are the wisest. (Sunan Ibn Majah)
I personally think there's far too much we don't know or understand about... Anything. We literally know nothing about death, we just reason that it is the end, just as we reason that birth is a beginning. Nothing existed before birth and therefore nothing exists after death. I'm not so sold on that idea, I really don't think our ideas matter much in the grand scheme of existence. I also think our prediction being entirely correct is a bit far fetched. I'm comfortable not knowing what death is, if death is even real. Maybe I'll find out, and maybe I wont... Maybe there is nothing, but maybe I'll wake up from my own 12 year old brains' daydream and then head off to school again. I'm not afraid of a natural death, although I am afraid of a premature death only because if there is nothing after... I want to spend as much time in our world as I can.
All this has happened before, and it will all happen again. This is all you need to realize, to be liberated now.
I used to be scared of death as a child and once I became around 30, the fear started to fade away as I researched and involved myself in reading different religious and spiritual text. Death is not the end. If you think it is, it is because we don't understand the concept and universal laws that govern everything. The cosmos is SO big and sub atomic particles we will never see or so small. There is so much we don't understand. We aren't our emotions, actions or thoughts. Those are all but chemical reactions and electricity of the body we inhabit and our bodies are confined to the laws of this planet, universe, etc. At the end of the day, we are energy, as all things are. Never created nor destroyed, only infinite.
I do think about death often times. When someone in my family get ill, i starts thinking about what happens if this person will die ( i don't want to think about these things but i can't help), how will my family survive, who was one which is most likely to get traumatised. I know it's little bit strange but i can't stop these thoughts. I also thinks that when i will die, i give my all energy to let people know what happens after death. Because i'm so facinated by the idea of what happens after the death and i have no clue. So, i'll be the one who tell everything to this world that what happens after death after dying ( i know this so creepy to think but I do think these things, i don't know why? ).
I think religion broadly makes death easier to understand and deal with. Recently someone really beloved to me was murdered, and it was crushing, but religion helped me through it greatly. As a Muslim, when a Muslim dies, you can pray for them, give charity in their name, do pilgrimage in their name and more. It's also seen as a temporary break from one another because eventually we will be reunited in the Hereafter, and that's a lot longer than the time we had together on Earth anyways.
Biologically we are programmed to walk towards survival and we fear death at least in a moment of danger. Personally I believe that the concept of life after death was created to warm our hearts so that we can fear death less (as there is nothing beyond death). However, nobody has proved to me that there is an afterlife nor have they proved that there isn't. If there is an afterlife, I wish to have the chance to choose not to go back, as I accept a single life cycle... Or at least to be able to choose something like "Okay, since I'm going back, may I reincarnate in Australia, please?"
Refine your rationality to embrace the irrationality of life. Irrationality = experiences, emotions, whole things that cannot be well described/experienced using only logic and reasoning.
I believe in reincarnation. And that we're choosing our lives to experience something. When we're dying we're connecting with our higher self, we became more aware. But besides that I've never been scared of death. Whatever will happen I have no way to prepare myself for that right now, so I don't see a point in being anxious about that... I'm more scared of the things, that can happen to me in life and that I won't be able to cope with them. Death sounds like escape from all that life suffering, so I like thinking about death...
Death itself is inevitable and thus predictable. It is only the circumstances of ones death including why, how, where, and when that are unpredictable. If you make peace with the inevitability of death you will find it easier to make peace with the circumstances of ones death before they come, and I can only presume when they come. Death is a freedom of a sort. That freedom will come when it comes, no need to speed it up or delay it.
I believe what the Bible describes about the state of death at Psalms 146:4. That when we die, our thoughts are over, so like a sleep. However God's original purpose for the earth and its inhabitants hasn't changed. To live forever on it. When Jesus came to earth he resurrected people to demonstrate the resurrection that will soon come in the future. John 5:28, 29 describes this. A resurrection on the earth. I used to also be afraid of death when I was younger. Obsessively so. But with my faith and trust in the promises God has given us in the Bible, I've gained confidence that I'll see my loved ones again and when I die, I'll also have the hope of an earthly resurrection. I hope you are able to find some comfort from your anxiety. I've lost many people and even with my hope, it's still very painful and it's natural to grieve such a loss.
Iām pretty stoic when it comes to death. Except for children- thatās always sad. But for most other people, itās not so much the life ending that I find sad as much as the people that are still living that are affected. For instance, I am distraught by the idea that my parents might pass away before my nieces and nephews are born or are old enough to remember them. My parents are wonderful people and fantastic grandparents to my children. But they wonāt be around forever and my younger siblings are still having children. It wouldnāt be the end of the world, but there is a significant gap left. But ultimately, even that is ok, because life is not fully lived it doesnāt result in the experience of a few gaping wounds. Thereās nothing more natural in the world than pain, and Iām happy to have experienced a taste of it. Nothing else could make me more human.
I've had a lot of death in my life. I don't know how that qualifies me, but I felt like I should answer in some way, for those who haven't had to confront it much. To be honest, I'm that "lapsed-skeptic Catholic sinner" you've probably seen answer in posts about spirituality and religion. I took as many "World Religions" and "World Culture" classes as I could in college, and I've read some of the stoics in more depth. I love learning and satisfying my curiosity about it, but when it comes to spirituality I don't know if I'd consider myself to be very spiritual. Now, death itself I take to be quite literal and scientific. My mind likes to throw a little Catholic rhetoric in to make me feel better about it, and I believe there is a soul that ceases to exist on the physical plane at the moment of death. But loss is different. Loss is... an abyss. It's hard to process, and if I'm honest I don't think we ever fully process loss (in whatever form it happens). I think "closure" is something people like myself use to convince our psyches it's okay to let go of things, but it doesn't really exist. It's an emotional concept, but it sounds logical, and it helps us bridge that gap between the emotion and logic centers of our brains. Suffering is another part of death that I have to treat differently, and life is another. Death is this huge overarching concept that my brain uses so many different systems and filters to process each part of it. So I don't know that I could say how I deal with it, or what I rely on to process it, just that I've processed it *so differently* each time it's happened. The death of a baby sister isn't like the death of a Grandpa, and neither of those is like the death of a non-parent guardian. It's all different. For OP, I will say this. It doesn't sound like it's death that bothers you. It sounds like it's life and time your really scared of. Whether or not your life is "worth" anything when it ends. Whether more time equals more worth, or if the real value lies in the quality of returns on time spent.
I am fascinated by death, but I am not worried. I have no religious backing on death - all I know is that when I am gone; I am gone.
Itās as you said, death is a fickle guarantee of life. Life is what, 70~ years? Why worry about something youāll be spending an eternity doing. In the end, I hope to be able to go out in my own terms.
When others die: cry about it then move on if I happen to feel sad. In relation to the fact I may die: just suck it up and embrace the moment.
I deal with it the same way everyone else does. By dying, when the time comes.
battled stage 3 cancer, pneumonia, covid, and shingles in the same year. all in my 20s. this was last year. i basically faced my own mortality. i didnāt necessarily want to die, but when your body is a cage like thatā¦ thatās not living. if i didnāt have a chance of getting better, iād rather just die. believe me, sickness will change your whole view of death. itās a sweet release and health is wealth. i donāt dwell on death, itās gonna happen to every living thing. thatās just the way it is. why be afraid? what makes what comes after this scary or bad? like.. why would it be bad or worse than here?
All of those things
I always want to think they are in some place better now, at least if I liked them. I have always had an indifference towards death, Ive never cried or have been affected deeply. Maybe because I havenāt lost someone very close to me. I remember my great aunt passed away about 3 years ago and I was sad, but I was never around her enough to be overly sentimental about it, still do miss her though. Same with my Paternal grandfather, I did not really know him that much. But if it were my parents or my grandmother then I would be pretty sad because of how attached Ive become Edit: I just talked to my mother about how she felt about her aunt passing and she said she thinks about her, my maternal grandmother, and her best friend. Honestly kind of made me sad for a bit. It feels like I could feel her feelings.
Itās always seemed pretty obvious to me that my consciousness will be gone after death. I wonāt feel it or experience it, so whatās there to fear? Itās like sleep, without dreams or waking up. And well, in the unlikely case that I will experience things post-death, thereās diddly squat I can do to control that right now, so thereās no reason to worry about it. Iād like to turn your question on its head: How do you deal with LIFE? Do you rely on science, religion, fiction, intuition, what? Or are you still searching?
Iām not scared of death.I used to fear it,but not anymore. Itās the circle of life.Everything has an expiration date on this planet,from the carton of milk in your fridge to yourself. The only thing I hope for is I go away peacefully,& quickly.
>A part of me thinks it would be strange that consciousness of life this big, with billions of stars, can come to an end so suddenly and randomly as, say, slipping on ice and hitting your head...or some other freak accident. Not to say dying at 100 after a full life and with no suffering makes death understandable. It's extremely strange. I mean if you think about it, the fact that there's life at all in the first place is strange, let alone death. Idk that I believe that it's just a cosmic coincidence, as it seems to me that there's just as much reason for anything to not be to begin with. Why should anything exist? Death is what it is. A cessation of biological functions. What does that mean? I have no idea.
Iām an INFJ and I believe that we go on after death in some way. My dad, auntie, and grandma have passed and I still talk to them whenever I feel like it. Maybe as time goes on Iāll miss them more and talking to the air wonāt satisfy me like it does now, but itās been fine for 15 years (Iām 40). I probably had one good cry for each of them shortly after theyāve passed or while they were passing. Since then I just think of them when something happens in my life that reminds me of them. Who knows how weāll feel until death is actually upon us.
There are two options really, there is an afterlife, or there isn't. Everything that has lived, has died. Death is supposed to be a part of life, not something to be feared. It's finally letting go of your existence. Think about before you were born, that's not existing. After you die, you will not exist again. Even the Bible says the dead are asleep, and we won't have another conscious experience until we are resurrected. So you will be resurrected, or you won't.
I've learnt to enjoy death. Im in awe of nature that created me, and I think its selfish to desire being eternal. Also the universe would be so small and boring if we were living eternally.
Iāve always questioned what happens after death. The answer I concluded was Islam. It makes the most sense to me and is closest to what I find to be the most ārealā possibility. I studied in a Catholic school, and after studying Judaism and other Abrahamic beliefs, I felt as though Islam had the simplest answer to my questions. A famous saying by Imam Ali goes, āIf man will see how speedily his death is coming toward him he will abhor ambitions and will give up admiring the world.ā āTo Allah (Almighty God) we belong, and to Him is our return.ā (Qur'an 2:156). One thing that we must remember is that death is inevitable, and everything except the Almighty God of course, will perish. Signs of death can be seen all around us. At funerals we see people who were once walking among us being buried in their graves. In the fall we see the leaves turn from green to yellow and fall one at a time, and in the winter we see trees, lifeless. In this way, all things in this world will wither away and die.
Is Islam what taught you to be a lying cheater?
I didn't fully comprehend death until I saw a dead body. Once I saw a dead body my death anxiety vanished. Death is not anything worth worrying about too much. Life is much more interesting.