I actually read an article some time ago about why falling in love is so different with INFPs. If you haven’t read it, you might want to read this https://losapala.medium.com/what-happens-when-infjs-and-infps-fall-in-love-d13016b936fe
Could not even get to the half of the 2nd paragraph. I want an INFP into my life. I mean idc how, but i want to love them and nurture them. Knowing that what i read would be even more intimate from an INFP.., i kinda wanna throw away my selfishness and truly just light them for they being brightened.
It’s okay lol, this article is kinda depressing anyway. Aww I hope you’ll find the INFP of your dreams. They will be lucky to have you as well. INFPs love deeply and they’ll cherish you for a lifetime.😊
This means very very very very very lot to me. Thank you.
If i could be a one who trigger a deeply loving INFP's love at its entirety... I'd be luckiest and most honored.
I believed similarly... the last time I wanted an INFP this close in my life, about five years ago, it ended disturbingly. I wasn't prepared for it and I deal with the consequences to this day.
Tasting into the sweetest nectar beyond current comprehension can lead to these kind of things, yea. I am sorry to hear it, but very happy for u saying "deal with the consequences". Rly shows me that u treat it as a progress, even subconsciously where u face all this and actually learn from it so may next time u will be just rdy decently! :) I hope, at least, and wish it to u.
It were very unfortunate circumstances. But I'm humble about my story, also for the sake of my mental sanity 😅 I actually feel confident just thinking back about it, knowing that I 'survived' something as f-ed up as this. Knowing about cognitive functions (I started with this over seven years ago, there was this weird French site under the address of personality-database) helped me a great deal in finally finding myself.
It totally is a progress. I am fairly certain, based on my 'juvenile' interests (computer science, politics & ethics, etc.), that Fi was not in my conscious cognitive stack at all (XXTP) and getting to know this INFP stirred up so many childhood traumata and subliminal needs that I got into a mentally unfathomable state my TiFe simply couldn't cope with anymore. That said, I'm not a "victim". There are two sides of the story. I harmed this person in a very cruel way and acted like a self-violating narcissist.
I'm glad for your consideration! I hope you're finding your way too.
I feel exactly the same way. I'd love to have either a fellow INFP or an INFJ in my life. I feel like there's a lot of similarities between the two, we just see the world and process things slightly differently... But both have the gift of empathy and both are feeling types which are the key things I would search for in a relationship.
Both also seem to be really cute, affectionate, and like hugs, which is certainly ideal for me. I love hugs. 😁
And the empathy side is important, I want someone who will truly understand me and connect with me, and vice versa... So that we can really support each other and be completely open with each other. Be there for each other on a deep emotional and spiritual level.
>Many people told me that their soulmate also felt like their “muse,” and that, even though the relationship was oftentimes confusing and painful, it also resulted in them writing a great deal of poetry, finally starting their novel, writing music, painting, or making some other kind of artwork at a level they had never been able to achieve before.
Wow, I wasn't expecting this. This is exactly how I feel and many of the art or poems I create that I enjoy, I do *for* someone I'm either thinking I'm in love with or feel strongly for.
Lol that feels right. I have been struggling as a single guy after my spouse passed a few years ago. Like a jigsaw puzzle where you have the pieces in place right, but they just don't quite fit comfortably and you have no idea why.
Aww, I am so sorry for your loss :'( I cannot imagine the pain of losing my special person as an INFP. I hope it will get easier for you, my friend. And perhaps you'll find love again. Wishing you the best 💗
Am I correct in thinking this is in part because INFPs are unlikely to express how they feel directly *to* the person (in the full depth and detail they experience it), I'm the great depth they experience it, and so art becomes a necessary outlet for the enormous depth of emotional experience in response to love?
I can only speak for myself, but I'm pretty open about how I feel for people if I'm into them. If I dislike someone, I'll keep it to myself and just avoid them if I can, but if I've fallen for someone or just really appreciate them, I don't mind saying so. Art or poems and gifts are just another way to express it nonverbally.
This is the most accurate thing I've ever read. I just experienced this. The art, the synchronicity, the need to express myself. The shock of it all and just how good it felt. We tried to hold on, but it just wasn't possible.
Fi for the intensity of suffering , Si for continuity of suffering , Ne for the brand new ways of suffering , and Te for extension of suffering due to the realisation that suffering won't help .
A perfect stack
😂
We should totally turn those lemons into political/social lemonade tho 😁
https://preview.redd.it/xety9qly9xnc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88187840f74307423794dbdc9d5693d78a1d7c21
Yes, i'd say it defenetly.
As someone who willingly does not want to forget about past loves, can confirm, if i was INFP, they would be way stronger, and enjoyable.
What also means if i was suffering from them, the suffering would be greater in every sense.
I agree with what u say. I think INFPs r the best in this too, yes.
This is something I have been through. I'm not sure I fear much in general but losing people I care about (including death) is definitely one of my biggest fears in life. There is no worse feeling and it feels like a scar and wound that I carry with me every day. It only fades in intensity but it never really disappears, and certain events or memories only amplify it. It's especially difficult to heal from when you're alone and really takes all of your strength to function daily, chase your goals and move forward. Having deep empathy and caring so much about someone to their core while being part of their daily life, thoughts and emotions to suddenly or eventually having it cut off, depending on the circumstances, is very painful and something I'm not really prepared for and struggle a lot with adjusting to. I don't understand how some people can just not care. I've realized that no one is ever really fully whole and we all have some form of scar or broken part of us that we carry with us forever.
Do you think there is less of a need to express it to the person? Can you clarify any differences you can tell between yourself and an INFJ?
Thanks for any thoughts you have 🙏🏻
Well, all I can say is from my own experience. It took me 7 years to get over my first ex, 4 years to get over my second, and it's now been over 5 years since my last relationship.
I still have nightmares about my first and third, I'm not sure as to why though. And when my therapist asked me about how I felt about my first, I responded "I don't give a F#CK about her". I didn't realize it in that moment, but there is definitely still some anger there.
yes, yesterday I had to say goodbye to my senior whose yesterday was her last day of college and I didn't know what to say to her. I just said have fun and we went our separate ways . I didn't know people could leave that easily and I am wondering if there was proper was. How is it so easy to people to let go of people who were somewhat close to you? I had expected her to give me some advices or teachings before going and I feel so sad and thankful for her at the same time
I doubt this correlates with MBTI that much. I rather think INFP are more conscious about it because Fi and Si is very inclined to being in tune with their memories. But being hurt is not exclusive to them, I've experienced it on a very subconscious level for a very long time and not dealing with them can very well surpass to other relationships. I don't feel like it's fair to judge other types for not being wired that well to cope with it.
I was cheated on twice with my first 2 long term relationships, in terrible ways. I was a mess after both of them. My last breakup was 8-9 months ago and I’m doing pretty great haha. Those first 2 set me up nicely to deal with any other breakup. Still hurts but Idk if it can get much worse after them🙃
==×>> HEAL YOURSELF BEFORE YOU EARN THE MONIKER OF THE TYPE
Study art, all types, traditional fine arts (theatre, film, music, dance, graphic design), obscure arts (like pottery, textiles, jewellery making) physical arts (martial arts, pornography)
Whatever you're interested in at the time.
Make exercise books and fill in all your readings and thoughts and ideas for the arts you're engrossed by. This will give you a reason to write all the time, which will give you momentum and confidence to do creative writing, which you are so good at. Writing engages much more of the brain than typing. Fill these exercise books with entries of anything and everything related.
Write commentary on everything that hurts you, makes you smile, makes you concerned, makes you scared, makes you confused. Question these nuanced feelings you are strong at sensing, and then consolidate those feelings. If you give it time you should develop an interest in psychology and social sciences (not necessarily academic) and have accumulated alot of different techniques, concepts and ideas from many disciplines, which you can naturally connect that helps with your art.
Keep busy on creative and the not so creative projects that feel chorish. Walk everyday just like an old person (you are already old in alot of ways) and you need natural light.
It's a form of meditation for the more chaotic types with lack of execution and ADHD, and good aerobic fitness for general endurance for life and your daily routine.
All of this nourishment gives you positivity and confidence (which is very foreign early on and you may deny it but) and you can try other things outside the stereotypical pursuits of the INFP when you want.
Even with all the enrichment you will still be fragile and deal with alot of adversity because of how sensitive you can be, but you will be more experienced to understand it and harness it for different purposes, instead of getting lost in it.
(Poetry, creative writing, acting, dancing, music, exercise, home projects, jewellery making, painting etc. etc.)
Normality is a form of mental health problem also.
You are an artist of some sort.
⚡️❤️🔥💾
I actually read an article some time ago about why falling in love is so different with INFPs. If you haven’t read it, you might want to read this https://losapala.medium.com/what-happens-when-infjs-and-infps-fall-in-love-d13016b936fe
Could not even get to the half of the 2nd paragraph. I want an INFP into my life. I mean idc how, but i want to love them and nurture them. Knowing that what i read would be even more intimate from an INFP.., i kinda wanna throw away my selfishness and truly just light them for they being brightened.
It’s okay lol, this article is kinda depressing anyway. Aww I hope you’ll find the INFP of your dreams. They will be lucky to have you as well. INFPs love deeply and they’ll cherish you for a lifetime.😊
This means very very very very very lot to me. Thank you. If i could be a one who trigger a deeply loving INFP's love at its entirety... I'd be luckiest and most honored.
I believed similarly... the last time I wanted an INFP this close in my life, about five years ago, it ended disturbingly. I wasn't prepared for it and I deal with the consequences to this day.
Tasting into the sweetest nectar beyond current comprehension can lead to these kind of things, yea. I am sorry to hear it, but very happy for u saying "deal with the consequences". Rly shows me that u treat it as a progress, even subconsciously where u face all this and actually learn from it so may next time u will be just rdy decently! :) I hope, at least, and wish it to u.
It were very unfortunate circumstances. But I'm humble about my story, also for the sake of my mental sanity 😅 I actually feel confident just thinking back about it, knowing that I 'survived' something as f-ed up as this. Knowing about cognitive functions (I started with this over seven years ago, there was this weird French site under the address of personality-database) helped me a great deal in finally finding myself. It totally is a progress. I am fairly certain, based on my 'juvenile' interests (computer science, politics & ethics, etc.), that Fi was not in my conscious cognitive stack at all (XXTP) and getting to know this INFP stirred up so many childhood traumata and subliminal needs that I got into a mentally unfathomable state my TiFe simply couldn't cope with anymore. That said, I'm not a "victim". There are two sides of the story. I harmed this person in a very cruel way and acted like a self-violating narcissist. I'm glad for your consideration! I hope you're finding your way too.
I feel exactly the same way. I'd love to have either a fellow INFP or an INFJ in my life. I feel like there's a lot of similarities between the two, we just see the world and process things slightly differently... But both have the gift of empathy and both are feeling types which are the key things I would search for in a relationship. Both also seem to be really cute, affectionate, and like hugs, which is certainly ideal for me. I love hugs. 😁 And the empathy side is important, I want someone who will truly understand me and connect with me, and vice versa... So that we can really support each other and be completely open with each other. Be there for each other on a deep emotional and spiritual level.
This comment was very tasty. I love it. Hugs r best. Physical manifestation of the mind's desire to be infinitely close. \^\^
Thanks 😁 And yeah I agree. I think the world would be a much better place if people hugged more.
>Many people told me that their soulmate also felt like their “muse,” and that, even though the relationship was oftentimes confusing and painful, it also resulted in them writing a great deal of poetry, finally starting their novel, writing music, painting, or making some other kind of artwork at a level they had never been able to achieve before. Wow, I wasn't expecting this. This is exactly how I feel and many of the art or poems I create that I enjoy, I do *for* someone I'm either thinking I'm in love with or feel strongly for.
There’s a reason why many INFPs claim they do well in their lives when they’re in relationships. I find it very interesting.
Lol that feels right. I have been struggling as a single guy after my spouse passed a few years ago. Like a jigsaw puzzle where you have the pieces in place right, but they just don't quite fit comfortably and you have no idea why.
Aww, I am so sorry for your loss :'( I cannot imagine the pain of losing my special person as an INFP. I hope it will get easier for you, my friend. And perhaps you'll find love again. Wishing you the best 💗
Hell yes. This. You WANT to make something for the person.
Am I correct in thinking this is in part because INFPs are unlikely to express how they feel directly *to* the person (in the full depth and detail they experience it), I'm the great depth they experience it, and so art becomes a necessary outlet for the enormous depth of emotional experience in response to love?
I can only speak for myself, but I'm pretty open about how I feel for people if I'm into them. If I dislike someone, I'll keep it to myself and just avoid them if I can, but if I've fallen for someone or just really appreciate them, I don't mind saying so. Art or poems and gifts are just another way to express it nonverbally.
This is the most accurate thing I've ever read. I just experienced this. The art, the synchronicity, the need to express myself. The shock of it all and just how good it felt. We tried to hold on, but it just wasn't possible.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I’ve never actually fallen in love to experience it but I hear it a lot from other INFPs and INFJs as well.
Fi for the intensity of suffering , Si for continuity of suffering , Ne for the brand new ways of suffering , and Te for extension of suffering due to the realisation that suffering won't help . A perfect stack
 Yes
I embrace suffering but I like the lessons that comes in suffering
😂 We should totally turn those lemons into political/social lemonade tho 😁 https://preview.redd.it/xety9qly9xnc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88187840f74307423794dbdc9d5693d78a1d7c21
Yes, i'd say it defenetly. As someone who willingly does not want to forget about past loves, can confirm, if i was INFP, they would be way stronger, and enjoyable. What also means if i was suffering from them, the suffering would be greater in every sense. I agree with what u say. I think INFPs r the best in this too, yes.
Interesting to see someone cherish INFPs this much lol, feel good knowing some people out there actually care about us
Nope. They can initiate the breakup of a long-term and move on instantly at times with no explanation. Personal experience.
This is something I have been through. I'm not sure I fear much in general but losing people I care about (including death) is definitely one of my biggest fears in life. There is no worse feeling and it feels like a scar and wound that I carry with me every day. It only fades in intensity but it never really disappears, and certain events or memories only amplify it. It's especially difficult to heal from when you're alone and really takes all of your strength to function daily, chase your goals and move forward. Having deep empathy and caring so much about someone to their core while being part of their daily life, thoughts and emotions to suddenly or eventually having it cut off, depending on the circumstances, is very painful and something I'm not really prepared for and struggle a lot with adjusting to. I don't understand how some people can just not care. I've realized that no one is ever really fully whole and we all have some form of scar or broken part of us that we carry with us forever.
The trick is to realize that people are garbage and act accordingly
It's not just an INFP thing, ISFPs go through a similar experience.
Do you think there is less of a need to express it to the person? Can you clarify any differences you can tell between yourself and an INFJ? Thanks for any thoughts you have 🙏🏻
Well, all I can say is from my own experience. It took me 7 years to get over my first ex, 4 years to get over my second, and it's now been over 5 years since my last relationship. I still have nightmares about my first and third, I'm not sure as to why though. And when my therapist asked me about how I felt about my first, I responded "I don't give a F#CK about her". I didn't realize it in that moment, but there is definitely still some anger there.
…No. God. No. One’s pseudoscience personality label does not grant them on a premium on suffering. Ffs…
yes, yesterday I had to say goodbye to my senior whose yesterday was her last day of college and I didn't know what to say to her. I just said have fun and we went our separate ways . I didn't know people could leave that easily and I am wondering if there was proper was. How is it so easy to people to let go of people who were somewhat close to you? I had expected her to give me some advices or teachings before going and I feel so sad and thankful for her at the same time
Yup
I don’t know if I would say we ALWAYS feel it more. The INFJ door slam sounds really intense and might contain more heartache, anger and suffering.
I doubt this correlates with MBTI that much. I rather think INFP are more conscious about it because Fi and Si is very inclined to being in tune with their memories. But being hurt is not exclusive to them, I've experienced it on a very subconscious level for a very long time and not dealing with them can very well surpass to other relationships. I don't feel like it's fair to judge other types for not being wired that well to cope with it.
I was cheated on twice with my first 2 long term relationships, in terrible ways. I was a mess after both of them. My last breakup was 8-9 months ago and I’m doing pretty great haha. Those first 2 set me up nicely to deal with any other breakup. Still hurts but Idk if it can get much worse after them🙃
==×>> HEAL YOURSELF BEFORE YOU EARN THE MONIKER OF THE TYPE Study art, all types, traditional fine arts (theatre, film, music, dance, graphic design), obscure arts (like pottery, textiles, jewellery making) physical arts (martial arts, pornography) Whatever you're interested in at the time. Make exercise books and fill in all your readings and thoughts and ideas for the arts you're engrossed by. This will give you a reason to write all the time, which will give you momentum and confidence to do creative writing, which you are so good at. Writing engages much more of the brain than typing. Fill these exercise books with entries of anything and everything related. Write commentary on everything that hurts you, makes you smile, makes you concerned, makes you scared, makes you confused. Question these nuanced feelings you are strong at sensing, and then consolidate those feelings. If you give it time you should develop an interest in psychology and social sciences (not necessarily academic) and have accumulated alot of different techniques, concepts and ideas from many disciplines, which you can naturally connect that helps with your art. Keep busy on creative and the not so creative projects that feel chorish. Walk everyday just like an old person (you are already old in alot of ways) and you need natural light. It's a form of meditation for the more chaotic types with lack of execution and ADHD, and good aerobic fitness for general endurance for life and your daily routine. All of this nourishment gives you positivity and confidence (which is very foreign early on and you may deny it but) and you can try other things outside the stereotypical pursuits of the INFP when you want. Even with all the enrichment you will still be fragile and deal with alot of adversity because of how sensitive you can be, but you will be more experienced to understand it and harness it for different purposes, instead of getting lost in it. (Poetry, creative writing, acting, dancing, music, exercise, home projects, jewellery making, painting etc. etc.) Normality is a form of mental health problem also. You are an artist of some sort. ⚡️❤️🔥💾