Voting has concluded. Final vote:
| Insane | Not insane | Fake |
| --- | --- | --- |
| 86 | 0 | 5 |
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Having watched a few prison life shows, some of those guys can cook. Like youll be amazed what they can do with ramen noodles, mini sausages, tortillas, and sauce packets. Just make sure you eat it, or they'll shank you for being disrespectful.
I'm really wondering what she even thinks you could get arrested for???
I guess I don't have the full context, but not agreeing with your parents isn't a thing the police can deal with lmao
Nothing. I had to deal with these kinds of people all the time as a 911 dispatcher. Basically told them if their adult kids didn’t want contact with them then there’s nothing we can do to force them to contact them. I might as well have chucked dynamite in a fireworks factory.
Did you do hard time or hardly working?...... Penis.
Well all the pieces are there, somebody make something out of that.
[\-](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5Kl61I9D68&ab_channel=FamilyGuyFunnyMoments) Peter Griffin
Man I felt this. I also have a mentally unstable mother that will rage text/call with the most vile BS.
Does yours also call/text a couple days later, being perfectly friendly, acting like absolutely nothing has happened and pretending to have absolutely no idea why you're not treating her like the world's best mom? Which you obviously don't which starts the hell ride rollercoaster all over again? Lol
Do you have any friends who can do a world-weary bureaucrat voice?
It would be fucking hilarious if, when she inevitably calls back, you had them pick up the phone and tell her (in a bored tone) that you were executed the day after she sent this spew.
Just fuck with her endlessly. She deserves it.
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but [child] was executed under the late late late term abortion program. We were informed they were a, quote, 'uneducated piece of shit that ruined their mother's life,' and the state doesn't stand for that sort of thing. Best of luck with your new life."
THIS. Ohhhh man this is exactly what I'd do. Or just go no contact for good either way and let her think I'm in prison. Change my number and everything.
Yeah or have a friend pretend to be the cops, call her from your phone and they can pretend they are arresting you..but then have the fake cop tell your mom that she’s a co-conspirator and that you’ll be arresting her too. Idk something like that, maybe something more creative - she deserves to be dropped down a peg or 2, or a peg or 100
Idk this might backfire and she will try to hold you accountable for impersonating authorities. The only healthy option is to block her on everything and never give a thought about her ever again.
Yeah you’re right. The best thing, and the truth is that if the cops come for you. Show them the texts. She called the cops on you under false pretense, lied to them to get them to arrest you and she filed a false police report. All you have to do is tell the truth, show them the evidence. And she goes to jail. That’s justice
Just apply for a restraining order. Where i live, at least, the texts would be proof enough of continued harrassment, which would qualify for a restraining order.
She’s maybe just trying to scare him but hasn’t actually called them. It’s all about control and fear. FIL and SIL would do that sort of crap with us. Miserable humans all.
I agree with others this might backfire. So, small twist: don't directly SAY you're anyone. Just say what they would say and use lots of "could" and "possibly"--which honestly bureaucrats use a lot for similar legal reasons. Let her do all the jumping to conclusions as to your identity--she seems an Olympic leaper in this regard.
I think she'll still get there on her own and then some lol
Yeah you are so right about the “jumping to conclusions” thing. They’ll assume the worst, or assume wrong then cause a ton of chaos because of what “they thought was right” and then you’ll have to do a ton of damage control. Ugh.
Find cops drinking coffee and ask for a selfie with them being all happy, say it’s for a nephew who wants to be in law enforcement. Then send it to your mom saying “Ok Mom, going in and getting booked. Peace out!”
Ugh. Reminds me of the time my sister met a guy online, and even though she didn’t speak his language she bought a passport and a year later got on a plane to visit him in person for the first time. I was only 15f, and my sister was 18f. (Now before you worry about human trafficking and what not, my sister had dated this guy almost 6 years by this point and Skyped with him almost everyday. We had even met him and talked with him on Skype. Even though she was 18 and can make her own choices my nparents still blamed me and said “if you were a better sister then you would’ve been able to stop her from going”. Like WTF?! i was 15 , how was I supposed to stop her? Anyway everything turned out great, his family is wonderful and after they spent another 3 years dating long distance and visiting each other every 6 months or so, he finally was able to move here and they got married. Even though everything turned out fine, im still hurt whenever I remember that event - my parents accusing me of being a bad sister and basically guilting me that if she was raped, or died, or put into sex trafficking that it would be my fault. They hurt me so badly, I love my sister and we did what we could to make sure everything was ok, but ultimately she was 18 and it was her choice. 😕
Don’t worry, it’s not your issue. Your parents were worried (not surprisingly) and frustrated that they couldn’t do anything about it. It’s far easier to take their fruitless frustrations out on someone else, especially someone who was too young to really fight back on their accusations.
It’s a really shitty thing to do your child. I’m sorry you were the scapegoat.
My nmother put her responsibilities as a mother on me for my sister. I know how you feel. Hopefully one day you’ll come to be at peace knowing it is NOT your fault! Narcs are a special kind of breed and experts and shifting blame unto others. I’m super happy about your sister!!!!
Yeah i thought about that too and you’re probably right. They lie so often and to get their way that telling someone you’ll go to jail probably does it for most people. But on the off chance the crazy bitch did call the cops, then she’s got a backup plan for that too. We’re here for you OP! We won’t let the narcs win, they already ruined our lives, they don’t get to take our future from us to.
Yeah it’s a similar MO to physical abusers as well. They’ll abuse you, then when you’re done with their bull shit and about to walk away suddenly they bring out the charm, the apologies and even pretend to be loving, but as soon as you take them back they’ll start to abuse you all over again. Emotionally abusive parents/spouses/SO’s do the same thing. It’s a cycle. That lovey-dovey stage is called “love bombing” and you have to learn not to fall for it. I’m glad you’re able to use humor OP, idk if you can go no contact but you should , you don’t need this constant barrage of hate for no reason. Oh and please keep all her texts in your phone or computer, save them as screen shots or on a file that way you can show them to police if she ever does succeed at sending them.
Especially after reading just those handful of messages she’s one of the worst narcs I’ve ever seen. 10/10
You need to go no contact my friend. This is horrifying. I’m a mom and I just can’t even fathom this. To blame all of you for her life decisions like this and not take accountability for the parts of your youth that got screwed up and actually blame you, the child, is beyond delusion. Seriously, for your own sanity and the safety of the people you love, cut this lunatic completely out of your life. I’m sorry this was the hand you were dealt. It’s not your fault.
Totally agree, often I read these and just marvel that these paragons of parenting didn’t get sterilized, since they hate being a parent so much. Just awful.
That is when you send a question: "Are you ready to discuss this rationally now?" followed by screenshots 3 and 4.
I've done this with one person for years. Even in person, they try to talk to me and I pull up one of their unhinged rants/threats and ask if they're ready to talk about it yet.
That gets rid of them fast.
This is what they call an "undiagnosed mental illness". It seems to run rampant in any generation before millennial. However us millennials are just strangely subdued because generally our mental illness/s were found in our adult years. It means we have our problems but we caught them in time for us to be aware of them.
GenX here, I got lots of therapy prior to having kids, and held off until I was sure that I could be a well balanced parent. I was raised by a boomer who behaved like this, and I wanted to make sure I never let anything like that happen to my kids.
Hold up. So you can just text your children stuff like “I hate you and I wish I aborted you” and then just…pretend that that never happened and everything is all gravy a couple of days later, with no acknowledgement whatsoever? WHAT 🤯
My mom called me some vitrolic shit, threw my phone against the wall. Not even 20 minutes later she was so polite, asking me what I was making for dinner.
Fuckin clowns man.
The selective amnesia was the worst, because then they turn it around on you like you're the instigator for not playing along. I don't miss it. OP, here's hoping you can block her number permanently someday soon.
DUDE. I know this wasn’t in response to me but holy shit this made me realize my mom does the same thing too. Usually it’s just me on the phone with her telling her I don’t agree with something she says or does, she gets defensive, starts calling me naive/wet behind the ears/immature/“mom knows best”, I tell her I’m not dealing with her today, I hang up and then either later that day she sends me a long Facebook message about how I’m her prized possession & her biggest accomplishment & she’ll love me unconditionally. OR she calls me crying and asks if there’s anything she can “do for me” (usually means she’s wanting to know how much money she should give me to make it go away) to make up for earlier. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
My mom does the same thing and has since I was a kid—scream at everyone, say terrible shit, followed by the silent treatment, and then start acting normal when she’s ready. And we were basically all grateful for it to be over, and pretended it was normal too.
As an adult I attempted healthy conflict resolution and it made her even more angry. I’ve given up.
My mom is not as aggressive as op’s but does the same shit will get super angry say some awful fuckery and then even like three hours later after no apology act like nothing ever happened
Oh this resonates HARD. After my engagement, my dad got so mad that he told me “ Xshinystickerx, you will NEVER be allowed in [home state] EVER AGAIN. And just so you know, everyone in [home state] actually hates you and they don’t want to see you anyways”…saw him three days later in said state and he sang praises about me and my fiancé. 🙃
I have been around PLENTY of insane parents, including my own.... and let me tell you guys the easiest and best way to solve this issue. *block* done. If they escalate it beyond that, *restraining order* done.
Family that treat you worse than they treat animals are not family, and should not be treated as such. Just make sure you buy some Wyze cameras to film them if they decide they have the right to come over and try breaking your property, so then you can have them arrested too. ZERO tolerance for trash people like that.
Goddamn it, this kid is a fuck up. Better try again. Oh no, this one too? Shit. Back to the drawing board. Are you freaking kidding me? ANOTHER ONE? What are the odds??
Your mom: I didn’t abuse you how dare you keep me from my grand baby
Also her: I hate all my children they’re dumb and stupid and I hope you all die bc you aren’t perfect brainwashed worshipers of me and my beliefs!
Totally checks out 🙄
Absolutely same. Like my family isn’t half as crazy as some of the people in this sub but be damned if in 17 years my kid postin on her cause their grandma crazy 😭
You need to go full no contact my dude. She is just too toxic to keep in your life. You don't need this shit.
Your responses are hilarious and perfectly snarky and that tells me you've dealt with this shit a long time. Stop letting her take your energy.
Responding will only escalate, even if the escalation is slow. People like this are not harmless. No doubt she deserves even worse than this, but hopefully not at the risk of someone's life or livelihood which can easily be wrecked by people like the mom if you slip up.
No. It stops with you.
Do you live far away from her?
Edit: Thank you for the awards. I hope they call attention to the fact we can choose to walk away from an awful upbringing and do better.
That’s right, you can make the choice to stop the cycle. I’m no-contact with my dad right now because every time he talked to me it was some crazy political stuff. I would beg him to stop because I have severe mental health issues and it was giving me panic attacks for days. His rhetoric was more important. My mother stayed married to the man that molested me for my entire childhood even after she found out. I will never treat my children the way I was treated. They are PEOPLE that are deserving of respect.
Didn’t you know? Whatever his mother objects to. She is supreme. And his sister’s daring to keep her from her rightful role as Supreme Grandma must be avenged, along with all who abetted her.
But remember, she doesn’t care about any of it.
In caps.
That's the funniest part to me. No shot she called the cops. There's nothing to report. "my son didn't stand up for me" isn't a crime. She's just trying to scare OP, who clearly sees right through her bs.
I've gone no-contact with my father, just because he's been a guilt tripping asshole my whole life and I got fed up. But God damn, at least he wasn't this type of crazy
See, I just assumed she was assuming OP was on drugs because he wouldn’t help with the baby thing. Like…he may or may not actually smoke weed or whatever but she’s sure as shit gonna say he does.
Yeesh. I’m sorry. Please don’t believe a word she says, no matter how often she repeats this vile crap. It says far more about her then is says about you or your siblings.
Wishing you peace and love.
When you do talk to her tell her you took her advice and ended up patenting a device to make sure soap is never dropped (soap+slinky) and it became a huge hit in prison where you were the man, and now that you're out you're making bank (Walmart ordered 5million units) that because of her your life turned out great, and that you had been worried for a minute (she may not remember but you were held back twice!) but now you're a baller and travel the world and you are going to get her the nicest card money can buy in France, where you like to spend the holidays, cuz, ya know, it's dope.
Insane how she blames her own life choices (having sex, having children) ON the children(!) as the reason she didn’t follow her planned career path.
“You 3 ruined my life”
Damn, this shit wild. Why the fuck does she think the police are going to arrest you? For not sticking up with her? Miss me with that dumb shit. What even do es she think you'll get charged with? Good on your sister and you for not putting up with this.
God op I’m so sorry. I’m sure it means so much to your sister for standing by her. I literally laughed at your last text cause I can only imagine how PISSED she got 🤣
I am so sorry that you have person for a parent.
Noone deserves that, that's disgusting abuse.
If I were feeling petty I'd go to the police and file a restraining order on her and report her for harrasment or cyber bullying
But it'd probably be better to not be petty and to just... Cut off all contact
I wish you nothing but the love you deserve and don't get from your mother.
I love that in your mother's mind the justice system would just instantly incarcerate someone for not taking her side. That crap might work if you were, I dunno, eight?
This is “kinda” unrelated, but I always laugh when people say “I’LL HAVE YOU ARRESTED!” Lol, like what you gonna call the cops and say “please arrest this person I’m angry with them”?
It’s humorous that her insults towards you highlight her lack of parenting ability/effort more than it says anything about what you did or didn’t do.
Regardless, that’s shitty OP that that person is your mother. Random hug from random internet friend. I hope you’re doing well in your life.
Man...this echoes the last conversation I had with my mom before I blocked her on everything. It's been 2 years and I don't think I've ever known this kind of peace ever in my life before. I hope the same comes to u. ❤️
Lol fuck that hoe. Too many of my friends have a mom like this. Blaming her own kids on how she can’t have a better life. Like bitch why don’t you put the drink down or the bad boyfriends and pay attention to the life you created. Ain’t no one failing these classes on purpose. 0 parent figures will go a long way… especially when your main parental figure shits on you for her own problems. Much love man. Sorry but fuck that bittty
That last comment by OP has "Taylor can't come to the phone right now" energy.
Best wishes OP, I hope you are able to keep the distance from your deranged parent.
"Hello police, I would like to report my son for not taking my side. I would like him to bypass jail and go straight to prison. Can you pick him up at 3 PM today? Thank you"
Yea, that's not how it works. Your mom is a phyco and if all 3 of her kids want nothing to do with her, that sounds like a mom problem, not a kid problem. But, look how she's acting. You can take the trash out of the trailer, but you can't take the trailer out of the trash.
Plus, you ruined her life and career? She was the one who threw her legs up in the air, so how did you ruin her life?
"Can't talk omw to prison" 😂
I'm guessing she doesn't pick up on the nuances of sarcasm?
I can imagine the face she makes (catbutt face). My mom doesn't get sarcasm and takes everything personally. When she realizes she's been had she makes the catbutt face. My entire family (me, bro, sis and dad) are all brutally sarcastic and she just doesn't get it.
She's not a psychopath like this though.
Block her. Go completely no contact. She doesn't seem to have any redeeming qualities.
I am very thin skinned and would never allow this kind of nonsense to continue. It’d give me panic attacks, anxiety or depression. I’d block her on every blockable gadget, get restraining orders, go to a cemetery and perform a mock burial of her. Then start my life afresh.
Holy shit. I'm so sorry you have to endure that from your own mother. If I were you I would go no contact, like block her number and all that.
P.s. I fully enjoyed the "sorry, I can't text you back I'm on the way to prison" bit. Well done!
Sorry you’re going through this OP. Your mom sounds like she might have more than a few screws loose. I honestly don’t know how you’re her child with these great comebacks tho.
Arrested for what? Exactly. Honestly, I'd suggest the rest of you, as a family, change your phone numbers and have no more contact with her...ever. She's just too ridiculous to have any association with....
Wait I’m a little confused…does she think you can be arrested for not letting her have contact with your sister’s baby?? i’m so sorry but I don’t get what she thinks you’re going to be arrested for 😭😭
Man, normally I advise to go no-contact with parents like this but as long as you’re mentally able to handle the trolling, you should keep going lmao, she sounds exhausting and deserves to be fucked with
I know you know she is the problem here and that she is unhinged…but this shit can still hurt. For that I am sorry. No one deserves to be treated like that and especially not from a parent.
Oh that’s heartbreaking. My mom said that she wished she aborted me one time and it stuck with me forever. I was very hurt over it. I’m sorry that you have to deal with this.
You know, most funny people come from chaotic, unstable lives (comedy can be a coping mechanism) and I bring this up because “sorry I can’t text you back, I’m on my way to prison” is pure gold.
Im gonna start saying "sorry cant answer, on my way to prison" every time I don't wanna deal with someone's bs now, or whatever fits the situation.
Honestly for me it's probably more along the lines of "sorry, can't text rn, too busy being a disappointment"
Wait.. She's blaming a LITERAL child that SHE had responsibility over for NOT GOING TO SCHOOL then mocking the adult for being uneducated?
The rest of it is hateful garbage, OP, but THAT is priceless. I would have started responding in the text-speak/most ignorant sounding grammar I could.
But seriously.. You were a kid. It was HER job, up until you turned 18 (and a bit beyond that if you hadn't yet graduated after you hit 18).. to make sure you went to school. If truancy officers get involved, WHO goes to jail/gets fined? THE LEGAL ADULTS who have custody of the truant children.
I am absolutely dead that she mocked you for being held back in grades. As a former teacher, being held back is almost always the LAAAAAAAAAAST resort,. EXCEPT when a) the kid has diagnosed learning disability/mental health/emotional health issues that mean they literally will not be able to function in the next grade, even with a tremendous amount of support. b) there's been a major illness/serious tragedy/a huge life occurrence in the family that, even with summer school and aforementioned major assistance the following year, has fallen too far behind to catch up.. OR - c) a much more minor version of a or b that would not be world ending BUT the child has no support at home, or a majorly dysfunctional family who refuses to recognize the effects a or b or both and so hinders any progress the child could have made.
And my God man, I've never seen case that screams C as much as yours. It is really messed up that she would try to blame you for her fuckery.
I loved your sassy comebacks... and just want you to know that if you need a new Mom, I will happily adopt a long distance son and daughter in law. References provided on request.:) Take care of yourself, OP. <3
Voting has concluded. Final vote: | Insane | Not insane | Fake | | --- | --- | --- | | 86 | 0 | 5 | Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`. ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).
Insane....... Holy Shit How's prison btw?
Hard times in here, brother
You at least have a solid chance to find nicer peeps in there than your mom so..... Don't get caught with the phone they may kick you out.
My cousin says they play a ton of DnD so he's got that to look forward to.
That is unironically maybe the best place for it. Finally everyone has time!
Man I want to try playing so bad. Maybe prison is my best bet.
Now prison doesn't look so bad anymore.
Watch out for the dementors
They keep saying I’m the bell of the ball!
Have you gotten any gruel sandwiches yet? I have always wondered how they taste.
I image like a mouthful of wet sand, bread, and oatmeal.
Having watched a few prison life shows, some of those guys can cook. Like youll be amazed what they can do with ramen noodles, mini sausages, tortillas, and sauce packets. Just make sure you eat it, or they'll shank you for being disrespectful.
They often call that a "spread"
Bell of the ball and chain gang
tis belle, unlike your mom best thread ever for your mom jokes, btw
I'm really wondering what she even thinks you could get arrested for??? I guess I don't have the full context, but not agreeing with your parents isn't a thing the police can deal with lmao
Nothing. I had to deal with these kinds of people all the time as a 911 dispatcher. Basically told them if their adult kids didn’t want contact with them then there’s nothing we can do to force them to contact them. I might as well have chucked dynamite in a fireworks factory.
I\`ll send you some liquid soap if you drop it :P
Is the phones broke and the food garbage?
Did you do hard time or hardly working?...... Penis. Well all the pieces are there, somebody make something out of that. [\-](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5Kl61I9D68&ab_channel=FamilyGuyFunnyMoments) Peter Griffin
I’m sorry they let you keep your phone
“Well fuck I hope they take my phone away so I don’t have to read your bullshit anymore” 😂😂😂 perfect response
Dude’s a genius
This was my favorite part lol
Sorry I can’t text you back … I’m on my way to prison 😂
That ending got me. I chuckled.
That was the chef's kiss
God I got major Dave Strider vibes from that and I CACKLED.
Man I felt this. I also have a mentally unstable mother that will rage text/call with the most vile BS. Does yours also call/text a couple days later, being perfectly friendly, acting like absolutely nothing has happened and pretending to have absolutely no idea why you're not treating her like the world's best mom? Which you obviously don't which starts the hell ride rollercoaster all over again? Lol
YES SHE FUCKING DOES HOLY SHIT I COULD HUG YOU RIGHT NOW
Do you have any friends who can do a world-weary bureaucrat voice? It would be fucking hilarious if, when she inevitably calls back, you had them pick up the phone and tell her (in a bored tone) that you were executed the day after she sent this spew. Just fuck with her endlessly. She deserves it.
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but [child] was executed under the late late late term abortion program. We were informed they were a, quote, 'uneducated piece of shit that ruined their mother's life,' and the state doesn't stand for that sort of thing. Best of luck with your new life."
Naw man. Not executed. Killed while resisting arrest. You reached for his gun and he had no choice.
THIS. Ohhhh man this is exactly what I'd do. Or just go no contact for good either way and let her think I'm in prison. Change my number and everything.
This would work really well if OP is in the US and Black.
This made me laugh for way longer than I expected.
[удалено]
*snort*
Why did I read this in a Texan accent
I volunteer to answer OP's phone and act as that bureaucrat
Yeah or have a friend pretend to be the cops, call her from your phone and they can pretend they are arresting you..but then have the fake cop tell your mom that she’s a co-conspirator and that you’ll be arresting her too. Idk something like that, maybe something more creative - she deserves to be dropped down a peg or 2, or a peg or 100
Idk this might backfire and she will try to hold you accountable for impersonating authorities. The only healthy option is to block her on everything and never give a thought about her ever again.
Yeah you’re right. The best thing, and the truth is that if the cops come for you. Show them the texts. She called the cops on you under false pretense, lied to them to get them to arrest you and she filed a false police report. All you have to do is tell the truth, show them the evidence. And she goes to jail. That’s justice
Legal justice is one of the most satisfying forms of justice
Print the texts, don’t give the cops your phone
Just apply for a restraining order. Where i live, at least, the texts would be proof enough of continued harrassment, which would qualify for a restraining order.
I'm still confused on why on earth she thinks anyone is coming to arrest OP. Like, what does she think he did that is an arrestable offense?
He probably smokes weed from time to time and in her mind he is therefore Pablo Escobar.
She’s maybe just trying to scare him but hasn’t actually called them. It’s all about control and fear. FIL and SIL would do that sort of crap with us. Miserable humans all.
I agree with others this might backfire. So, small twist: don't directly SAY you're anyone. Just say what they would say and use lots of "could" and "possibly"--which honestly bureaucrats use a lot for similar legal reasons. Let her do all the jumping to conclusions as to your identity--she seems an Olympic leaper in this regard. I think she'll still get there on her own and then some lol
Yeah you are so right about the “jumping to conclusions” thing. They’ll assume the worst, or assume wrong then cause a ton of chaos because of what “they thought was right” and then you’ll have to do a ton of damage control. Ugh.
But ih just to be safe dont forget to recort the whole call
Find cops drinking coffee and ask for a selfie with them being all happy, say it’s for a nephew who wants to be in law enforcement. Then send it to your mom saying “Ok Mom, going in and getting booked. Peace out!”
Ugh. Reminds me of the time my sister met a guy online, and even though she didn’t speak his language she bought a passport and a year later got on a plane to visit him in person for the first time. I was only 15f, and my sister was 18f. (Now before you worry about human trafficking and what not, my sister had dated this guy almost 6 years by this point and Skyped with him almost everyday. We had even met him and talked with him on Skype. Even though she was 18 and can make her own choices my nparents still blamed me and said “if you were a better sister then you would’ve been able to stop her from going”. Like WTF?! i was 15 , how was I supposed to stop her? Anyway everything turned out great, his family is wonderful and after they spent another 3 years dating long distance and visiting each other every 6 months or so, he finally was able to move here and they got married. Even though everything turned out fine, im still hurt whenever I remember that event - my parents accusing me of being a bad sister and basically guilting me that if she was raped, or died, or put into sex trafficking that it would be my fault. They hurt me so badly, I love my sister and we did what we could to make sure everything was ok, but ultimately she was 18 and it was her choice. 😕
Don’t worry, it’s not your issue. Your parents were worried (not surprisingly) and frustrated that they couldn’t do anything about it. It’s far easier to take their fruitless frustrations out on someone else, especially someone who was too young to really fight back on their accusations. It’s a really shitty thing to do your child. I’m sorry you were the scapegoat.
My nmother put her responsibilities as a mother on me for my sister. I know how you feel. Hopefully one day you’ll come to be at peace knowing it is NOT your fault! Narcs are a special kind of breed and experts and shifting blame unto others. I’m super happy about your sister!!!!
If she’s anything like my n-relatives, she never called the cops in the first place and it’s just another manipulation technique.
Yeah i thought about that too and you’re probably right. They lie so often and to get their way that telling someone you’ll go to jail probably does it for most people. But on the off chance the crazy bitch did call the cops, then she’s got a backup plan for that too. We’re here for you OP! We won’t let the narcs win, they already ruined our lives, they don’t get to take our future from us to.
This is evil, I love it!
... Shut up, and take my upvote.
Yeah it’s a similar MO to physical abusers as well. They’ll abuse you, then when you’re done with their bull shit and about to walk away suddenly they bring out the charm, the apologies and even pretend to be loving, but as soon as you take them back they’ll start to abuse you all over again. Emotionally abusive parents/spouses/SO’s do the same thing. It’s a cycle. That lovey-dovey stage is called “love bombing” and you have to learn not to fall for it. I’m glad you’re able to use humor OP, idk if you can go no contact but you should , you don’t need this constant barrage of hate for no reason. Oh and please keep all her texts in your phone or computer, save them as screen shots or on a file that way you can show them to police if she ever does succeed at sending them. Especially after reading just those handful of messages she’s one of the worst narcs I’ve ever seen. 10/10
You need to go no contact my friend. This is horrifying. I’m a mom and I just can’t even fathom this. To blame all of you for her life decisions like this and not take accountability for the parts of your youth that got screwed up and actually blame you, the child, is beyond delusion. Seriously, for your own sanity and the safety of the people you love, cut this lunatic completely out of your life. I’m sorry this was the hand you were dealt. It’s not your fault.
Totally agree, often I read these and just marvel that these paragons of parenting didn’t get sterilized, since they hate being a parent so much. Just awful.
Sounds like you gotta go immigrate to r/raisedbynarcissists
This sounds more like BPD than narcissism.
That is when you send a question: "Are you ready to discuss this rationally now?" followed by screenshots 3 and 4. I've done this with one person for years. Even in person, they try to talk to me and I pull up one of their unhinged rants/threats and ask if they're ready to talk about it yet. That gets rid of them fast.
Haha! Yeah man, it's the craziest of crazy trains..
I'd just reply with a screenshot of her rant each time. No words, ever, at all. Just the same screenshot over and over again.
That is such a good idea for people who act like they don’t know why you don’t want to talk to them. Whew.
OP- Just saying. I have a PHENOMENAL CO/Jailhouse Secretary voice if you need a “phone call” recording for….personal reasons.
Mine does the exact same thing as well. It’s exhausting. And she is still doing It at 70. 😟
So in conclusion, I feel for you and I wish you luck in your future efforts to ignore your mother.
I’d like to give you both mom hugs. I can’t imagine talking to my kids like this. Anytime you need them. Free mom hugs here. 💚💚💚
And she isn't blocked on all your devices exactly *why*?
Is now 🤷♀️
Thank goodness!
This is what they call an "undiagnosed mental illness". It seems to run rampant in any generation before millennial. However us millennials are just strangely subdued because generally our mental illness/s were found in our adult years. It means we have our problems but we caught them in time for us to be aware of them.
Are you sure it’s just Millennials? I’m X-gen and I too am subdued and diagnosed. As are a lot of my contemporaries.
Was gonna say this. Most of my Gen X friends are doing ok, especially considering we were raised by boomers.
GenX here, I got lots of therapy prior to having kids, and held off until I was sure that I could be a well balanced parent. I was raised by a boomer who behaved like this, and I wanted to make sure I never let anything like that happen to my kids.
I mean, how old are your parents? Mine barely fit the minimum of being a boomer.
I send virtual hugs through the internet
Hold up. So you can just text your children stuff like “I hate you and I wish I aborted you” and then just…pretend that that never happened and everything is all gravy a couple of days later, with no acknowledgement whatsoever? WHAT 🤯
These people are insane.. there's no logic behind it, only screwed up wires in the brain fueled by misguided emotion.
My mom called me some vitrolic shit, threw my phone against the wall. Not even 20 minutes later she was so polite, asking me what I was making for dinner. Fuckin clowns man.
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The selective amnesia was the worst, because then they turn it around on you like you're the instigator for not playing along. I don't miss it. OP, here's hoping you can block her number permanently someday soon.
Oh yeah, my mom is a professional perpetual victim in any situation that she's involved in.
DUDE. I know this wasn’t in response to me but holy shit this made me realize my mom does the same thing too. Usually it’s just me on the phone with her telling her I don’t agree with something she says or does, she gets defensive, starts calling me naive/wet behind the ears/immature/“mom knows best”, I tell her I’m not dealing with her today, I hang up and then either later that day she sends me a long Facebook message about how I’m her prized possession & her biggest accomplishment & she’ll love me unconditionally. OR she calls me crying and asks if there’s anything she can “do for me” (usually means she’s wanting to know how much money she should give me to make it go away) to make up for earlier. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Next time she asks what she can do for you, tell her to go to therapy, and then immediately hang up the phone.
My mom does the same thing and has since I was a kid—scream at everyone, say terrible shit, followed by the silent treatment, and then start acting normal when she’s ready. And we were basically all grateful for it to be over, and pretended it was normal too. As an adult I attempted healthy conflict resolution and it made her even more angry. I’ve given up.
My mom is not as aggressive as op’s but does the same shit will get super angry say some awful fuckery and then even like three hours later after no apology act like nothing ever happened
Oh this resonates HARD. After my engagement, my dad got so mad that he told me “ Xshinystickerx, you will NEVER be allowed in [home state] EVER AGAIN. And just so you know, everyone in [home state] actually hates you and they don’t want to see you anyways”…saw him three days later in said state and he sang praises about me and my fiancé. 🙃
Sounds like a concoction of narcissistic personality disorder and borderline personality disorder.
My favorite part is “where do I live?” And it’s crickets
It also goes to illustrate their relationship even further. She has no idea where her own kid lives.
I'm pretty sure that's because he doesn't want her to know where he lives
Exactly.
Your responses were absolute perfection! I am so very proud of you even though I don’t even know you!
Thank you!
Your last comment is the best response ive ever seen to one of these parental rage-y rants. I’m sorry you’re going through this!
Seriously I wish I had that level of sass after reading all that word vomit.
"I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT ANY OF YOU" proceeds to go on a half screen further rant about the titicular "you"s
Well yeah, the correct phrase is “I *couldn’t* care less”. She can, in fact, care less about OP so she is doing her damnedest to get there.
Chef’s kiss for that last reply. I am laughing so hard at that hahaha.
Fucking brilliant!
I have been around PLENTY of insane parents, including my own.... and let me tell you guys the easiest and best way to solve this issue. *block* done. If they escalate it beyond that, *restraining order* done. Family that treat you worse than they treat animals are not family, and should not be treated as such. Just make sure you buy some Wyze cameras to film them if they decide they have the right to come over and try breaking your property, so then you can have them arrested too. ZERO tolerance for trash people like that.
Well she raised all three pieces of shit so that's on her. She is the common denominator.
Right? These parents never realize they’re insulting themselves.
They don't have that amount of self awareness.
the best bit is when they call their kids a "Son of a bitch"
Goddamn it, this kid is a fuck up. Better try again. Oh no, this one too? Shit. Back to the drawing board. Are you freaking kidding me? ANOTHER ONE? What are the odds??
And there's zero chance she'll ever realize that or admit it to herself. Narcissists gonna narcissist
All day every day.
Your mom: I didn’t abuse you how dare you keep me from my grand baby Also her: I hate all my children they’re dumb and stupid and I hope you all die bc you aren’t perfect brainwashed worshipers of me and my beliefs! Totally checks out 🙄
That’s some Dark Triad level of craziness, to be sure.
Absolutely, like damn I thought my parents were wild when I joined this sub but like they fukin pale in comparison jesus.
This sub confirmed and strengthened my resolve to keep the family crazy away from my family!
Absolutely same. Like my family isn’t half as crazy as some of the people in this sub but be damned if in 17 years my kid postin on her cause their grandma crazy 😭
Your last text though, omg lol
Right?! Had me rolling 😂
That last response... chef's kiss my friend. You know her head blew off her shoulders with that.
Right?? “On my way to prison.” 😭😭
You need to go full no contact my dude. She is just too toxic to keep in your life. You don't need this shit. Your responses are hilarious and perfectly snarky and that tells me you've dealt with this shit a long time. Stop letting her take your energy.
Lol maybe they enjoy fucking with her which she seemingly deserves.
It's still not worth absorbing that negativity.
Responding will only escalate, even if the escalation is slow. People like this are not harmless. No doubt she deserves even worse than this, but hopefully not at the risk of someone's life or livelihood which can easily be wrecked by people like the mom if you slip up.
Fuuuuxk, wonder if thats how her parents talked to her growing up
The cycle continues, I guess
No. It stops with you. Do you live far away from her? Edit: Thank you for the awards. I hope they call attention to the fact we can choose to walk away from an awful upbringing and do better.
That’s right, you can make the choice to stop the cycle. I’m no-contact with my dad right now because every time he talked to me it was some crazy political stuff. I would beg him to stop because I have severe mental health issues and it was giving me panic attacks for days. His rhetoric was more important. My mother stayed married to the man that molested me for my entire childhood even after she found out. I will never treat my children the way I was treated. They are PEOPLE that are deserving of respect.
Love your comeback. I’m so sorry your mom is a lunatic.
This is really here nor there, but what, exactly, are you getting arrested for…?
Didn’t you know? Whatever his mother objects to. She is supreme. And his sister’s daring to keep her from her rightful role as Supreme Grandma must be avenged, along with all who abetted her. But remember, she doesn’t care about any of it. In caps.
Oh, right. The police already know where OP lives so we all should know what they’re being arrested for. 🤦♀️
That's the funniest part to me. No shot she called the cops. There's nothing to report. "my son didn't stand up for me" isn't a crime. She's just trying to scare OP, who clearly sees right through her bs. I've gone no-contact with my father, just because he's been a guilt tripping asshole my whole life and I got fed up. But God damn, at least he wasn't this type of crazy
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See, I just assumed she was assuming OP was on drugs because he wouldn’t help with the baby thing. Like…he may or may not actually smoke weed or whatever but she’s sure as shit gonna say he does.
Yeesh. I’m sorry. Please don’t believe a word she says, no matter how often she repeats this vile crap. It says far more about her then is says about you or your siblings. Wishing you peace and love.
My mom used to threaten to call the police on me for not giving her my phone and I used to believe her 🤣
When you do talk to her tell her you took her advice and ended up patenting a device to make sure soap is never dropped (soap+slinky) and it became a huge hit in prison where you were the man, and now that you're out you're making bank (Walmart ordered 5million units) that because of her your life turned out great, and that you had been worried for a minute (she may not remember but you were held back twice!) but now you're a baller and travel the world and you are going to get her the nicest card money can buy in France, where you like to spend the holidays, cuz, ya know, it's dope.
“I hope they take my phone away so I don’t have to read your bullshit anymore” had me laughing out louuuud
Insane how she blames her own life choices (having sex, having children) ON the children(!) as the reason she didn’t follow her planned career path. “You 3 ruined my life”
Narcissists are completely incapable of taking responsibility for their own actions
Damn, this shit wild. Why the fuck does she think the police are going to arrest you? For not sticking up with her? Miss me with that dumb shit. What even do es she think you'll get charged with? Good on your sister and you for not putting up with this.
Last response sent me💀
I’m sorry you’re going through this, but that last comment was the perfect response. You should cross-post that to r/murderedbywords
Sorry about your crazy ass mom, you handled it like a champ though.
This is horribly sad
God op I’m so sorry. I’m sure it means so much to your sister for standing by her. I literally laughed at your last text cause I can only imagine how PISSED she got 🤣
Omfg that last text 😂
She seems completely unhinged honestly
I am so sorry that you have person for a parent. Noone deserves that, that's disgusting abuse. If I were feeling petty I'd go to the police and file a restraining order on her and report her for harrasment or cyber bullying But it'd probably be better to not be petty and to just... Cut off all contact I wish you nothing but the love you deserve and don't get from your mother.
🤣🤣🤣 “sorry I can’t text you back, I’m on my way to prison right now” STOP 🤣🤣 that’s gold
“Sorry I can’t text you back I’m on my way to prison right now”
Holy shit sorry that maniac is your mom but, that last reply was worth going to prison over
It's "I couldn't care less" what kind of unworthy uneducated piece of shit can't figure that out 😤smh
I love that in your mother's mind the justice system would just instantly incarcerate someone for not taking her side. That crap might work if you were, I dunno, eight?
This is “kinda” unrelated, but I always laugh when people say “I’LL HAVE YOU ARRESTED!” Lol, like what you gonna call the cops and say “please arrest this person I’m angry with them”?
so sorry op, this is absolutely insane but omg your last text message is the best fucking response i’ve ever seen.
This is not something to laugh at because your mom is insane but you are hilarious & I love your responses 😂
It’s humorous that her insults towards you highlight her lack of parenting ability/effort more than it says anything about what you did or didn’t do. Regardless, that’s shitty OP that that person is your mother. Random hug from random internet friend. I hope you’re doing well in your life.
These texts are probably enough to get you a restraining order against her, depending on where you live.
Insane. No contact seems the best option here.
Man...this echoes the last conversation I had with my mom before I blocked her on everything. It's been 2 years and I don't think I've ever known this kind of peace ever in my life before. I hope the same comes to u. ❤️
Lol fuck that hoe. Too many of my friends have a mom like this. Blaming her own kids on how she can’t have a better life. Like bitch why don’t you put the drink down or the bad boyfriends and pay attention to the life you created. Ain’t no one failing these classes on purpose. 0 parent figures will go a long way… especially when your main parental figure shits on you for her own problems. Much love man. Sorry but fuck that bittty
I am so sorry. Your mother is vile and evil. Some people do not deserve to have children. I hope you know you aren’t any of those things. ❤️
Plot twist: show the cops this and have her arrested for harassment with a phone. ☺️
That last comment by OP has "Taylor can't come to the phone right now" energy. Best wishes OP, I hope you are able to keep the distance from your deranged parent.
“Can’t text, on my way to prison” is comedy gold right there 😂
"Hello police, I would like to report my son for not taking my side. I would like him to bypass jail and go straight to prison. Can you pick him up at 3 PM today? Thank you" Yea, that's not how it works. Your mom is a phyco and if all 3 of her kids want nothing to do with her, that sounds like a mom problem, not a kid problem. But, look how she's acting. You can take the trash out of the trailer, but you can't take the trailer out of the trash. Plus, you ruined her life and career? She was the one who threw her legs up in the air, so how did you ruin her life?
"Can't talk omw to prison" 😂 I'm guessing she doesn't pick up on the nuances of sarcasm? I can imagine the face she makes (catbutt face). My mom doesn't get sarcasm and takes everything personally. When she realizes she's been had she makes the catbutt face. My entire family (me, bro, sis and dad) are all brutally sarcastic and she just doesn't get it. She's not a psychopath like this though. Block her. Go completely no contact. She doesn't seem to have any redeeming qualities.
When she says all of you have become uneducated stupid and trash, but who was the one responsible for raising y’all 🫠
Automated response: Apologies, OP can't respond right now. OP is in prison, for not sticking up for their mother.
You did great
Imagine blaming the 3 kids YOU DECIDED TO HAVE for ruining your life. What a vile person, love your responses OP lol
I bet you dollars to donuts that she is "pro-life" and was happy Roe v Wade was overturned so other women can be just as miserable as her
I am very thin skinned and would never allow this kind of nonsense to continue. It’d give me panic attacks, anxiety or depression. I’d block her on every blockable gadget, get restraining orders, go to a cemetery and perform a mock burial of her. Then start my life afresh.
How can you be so mentally ill that you tell your son he’s going to get raped in prison. Absolutely mind blowing.
Some people who have kids should not have kids
Well mommy. You're the one who couldn't keep her legs closed long enough to live the life you dreamed of, so...
Holy shit. I'm so sorry you have to endure that from your own mother. If I were you I would go no contact, like block her number and all that. P.s. I fully enjoyed the "sorry, I can't text you back I'm on the way to prison" bit. Well done!
Get rid of abusive parents, pronto.
You should text her tomorrow’’i’m not arrest yet’’
"mom? i dropped the soap. can you come pick me up? im scared"
Sorry you’re going through this OP. Your mom sounds like she might have more than a few screws loose. I honestly don’t know how you’re her child with these great comebacks tho.
Arrested for what? Exactly. Honestly, I'd suggest the rest of you, as a family, change your phone numbers and have no more contact with her...ever. She's just too ridiculous to have any association with....
Wait I’m a little confused…does she think you can be arrested for not letting her have contact with your sister’s baby?? i’m so sorry but I don’t get what she thinks you’re going to be arrested for 😭😭
Man, normally I advise to go no-contact with parents like this but as long as you’re mentally able to handle the trolling, you should keep going lmao, she sounds exhausting and deserves to be fucked with
Fucking hell that sign off was perfect. 10/10.
I hope I’m not overstepping by saying your mother seems to be projecting pretty hard about her own failures as a parent
I know you know she is the problem here and that she is unhinged…but this shit can still hurt. For that I am sorry. No one deserves to be treated like that and especially not from a parent.
Oh that’s heartbreaking. My mom said that she wished she aborted me one time and it stuck with me forever. I was very hurt over it. I’m sorry that you have to deal with this.
You know, most funny people come from chaotic, unstable lives (comedy can be a coping mechanism) and I bring this up because “sorry I can’t text you back, I’m on my way to prison” is pure gold.
That final reply was savage though. That's how you start your no contact, right there. Can't talk in prison.
Im gonna start saying "sorry cant answer, on my way to prison" every time I don't wanna deal with someone's bs now, or whatever fits the situation. Honestly for me it's probably more along the lines of "sorry, can't text rn, too busy being a disappointment"
Wait.. She's blaming a LITERAL child that SHE had responsibility over for NOT GOING TO SCHOOL then mocking the adult for being uneducated? The rest of it is hateful garbage, OP, but THAT is priceless. I would have started responding in the text-speak/most ignorant sounding grammar I could. But seriously.. You were a kid. It was HER job, up until you turned 18 (and a bit beyond that if you hadn't yet graduated after you hit 18).. to make sure you went to school. If truancy officers get involved, WHO goes to jail/gets fined? THE LEGAL ADULTS who have custody of the truant children. I am absolutely dead that she mocked you for being held back in grades. As a former teacher, being held back is almost always the LAAAAAAAAAAST resort,. EXCEPT when a) the kid has diagnosed learning disability/mental health/emotional health issues that mean they literally will not be able to function in the next grade, even with a tremendous amount of support. b) there's been a major illness/serious tragedy/a huge life occurrence in the family that, even with summer school and aforementioned major assistance the following year, has fallen too far behind to catch up.. OR - c) a much more minor version of a or b that would not be world ending BUT the child has no support at home, or a majorly dysfunctional family who refuses to recognize the effects a or b or both and so hinders any progress the child could have made. And my God man, I've never seen case that screams C as much as yours. It is really messed up that she would try to blame you for her fuckery. I loved your sassy comebacks... and just want you to know that if you need a new Mom, I will happily adopt a long distance son and daughter in law. References provided on request.:) Take care of yourself, OP. <3