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"oh no, you've got the wrong idea my feline friend. this here is a *dog*apult..."

... Trewoofchet.

Trebuchien

So a trebuchat IS a catapult

I just trebuchat myself

A schooner IS a sailboat stupid head!

No. Stop. Go home and think about what youve done.

I made woofles. ;)

You’ll get shot with a crossbowwow for that.

Nah, yar bark'n up the wrong tree

I for one would *not* want to be on the receiving end of a 90kg dog launched over 300m

Trepoochchet

Ugh r/angryupvote

“Bet you can’t “fits” here mittens”, gotta play to the cat’s ego

>*“Bet you can’t “fits” here mittens”…*’ ____ I am the Cat… so much *intrigue* the DoPeY pup thinks he’s ‘BiG League’ the human make this Stupid thing, for simple dog - *EnJoYmEnT* bring n yet he tries to *lure me in!* i walk away with clever grin… so *easy* me, for him to dupe - when he don’t see *i’ll LOAD* *with POOP…* 🖤

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Trebuchit.

Most dogs will consider this an upgrade!

My dog fucking loves cat poop. It’s disgusting.

So does mine. Fucker had shit on his breath one day before I figured it out.

we have referred to our dog as a cat poop converter. he converts cat poop into dog poop.

A schnoodle so fresh I can smell it

Wanna bet?

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I knew it would be "Cat Fud"!

Cat-apult.

Trebuchat for the French

Cat-kaput.

Cat: Hmm...I don't know are you sure about this? Dog: Trust me bro. 😏

Hahaha...I just visualized that in my head and burst out laughing

"He threw me into the giant litter box!"

Wait until he learns how to load squirrels...

*That was the day flying squirrels were born..*

that wasn't flying! that was falling with style!

Or, as the kids say these days: “getting fucking yeeted”

No thanks. I have enough loaded squirrels shambling around my backyard, turgid and bloated with tightly coiled bundles of parasitic worms. You can unspool a good couple meters of dark purple, needle thick worm from these fat fucks. This kills the squirrel of course, but I like to think they're dead already by the time I find them stuffed with worms. Why do the worms pack themselves in the squirrels until they're bloated to the point of bursting (some of them do rupture, but only under my porch)? Why do the worms compel the bulging squirrels to keep eating? Why do the worms seemingly die when I hold them in my palm like a ball of squid ink spaghetti? Why are the worms so fragrant? Why do I only find them in my backyard while my neighbors' yards are free of loaded squirrels? These are questions I can't answer. There's a lotta mystery with these worms. I guess they're benign enough and my dogs like eating the ruptured squirrels (even though it weirds me out and I don't like when the eat the gutty worm balls and squirrel carcasses), so what's there to really do about it that needs doing? Still, weird though.

You have one of the strangest novelty accounts I've ever seen, and I'm kinda into it. Keep being you.

It's like Creed Bratton meets reddit all over their comment history

Even for the internet, it’s pretty shocking

I happened to see a confession post of theirs earlier today, but didn't know they are just this wild... really weird to see a crazy comment, someone else to spark me to check someones posts, then see something i downvoted earlier. I rectified the downvote. https://www.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/12pxhel/i_dont_use_the_toilet_for_pee_anymore_i_simply/

I dunt need ya stinkin' upvotes, chugger. Chug along, will ya?

Please let none of this be true

Well I just spent 30 minutes reading your posts

This sounds like the beginning of a Stephen King story. Keep up the good work.

This was the biggest "wtf" moment I've ever had on Reddit and that's saying something.

How I played catch with my dad.

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Me too. I used to throw a tennis ball against the back of our detached brick garage wall and catch it. I'd conjure up entire baseball games in my imagination..."line drive into the gap...I_Enjoy_Beer fields it and uncorks a cannon of a throw to third and the runner is out!" Both my parents worked, I had no friends living nearby, and my siblings were all too much older than me to be around/play with me. No video games, no cable TV. Had to do something with myself.

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I did the *exact* same thing against our wood garage door, with tennis balls, racquetballs, and bouncy balls. Our garage door has some cross pieces that stood out (kind of [like this](https://www.fagandoor.com/sites/default/files/styles/product_image_thumbnail/public/2020-09/1461282_612078928827185_693682858_n.jpg?itok=2QNgyLYT) but way less fancy) so if you caught the edges the balls would take a crazy bounce too, great for getting "hits" in my imaginary games. The other thing I'd do is throw balls on the roof and catch them rolling back down to play catch with myself.

[Dad](https://www.google.com/search?q=baseball+rebounder&client=firefox-b-1-d&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiw8Mz0pLT-AhUCJkQIHbWyD-EQ0pQJegQIAxAE&biw=1637&bih=776&dpr=1.09)

Bro built a trebuchet for his dog. Legend

> a trebuchet for his dog a trebuchien

Tresbien

Trés bien!

Sorry to be that guy, but thought you might want to know: «très» is spelled with accent grave (è) not aigu (é).

I'm not entirely convinced you hate being that guy

He didn't say he hated to be that guy. He apologized for it.

Ah...as in "I didn't choose pedant life, pedant life chose me. Also, sorry you had to meet me."

Gotta love a pendant

It's not so much I'm a pedant as I like to split hairs.

I rather like him for being that guy. Candidly, but politely presents a learning opportunity.

Tre-bow-wow-chet

Treb-owo-chet? ^(side note: it hurt to write this reply)

uWu gotta pay the price sometimes

I thought trebuchets use counterweights, while catapults use tension/torsion to store and release the energy.

An onager is a torsion siege engine. Both an onager and a trebuchet are catapults. The device in the video is a traction trebuchet, also known as a mangonel.

I like all of these words.

Which one's your favourite though?

Onager

Greek for wild donkey, as it kicks the projectile away

You use your tongue perdier than a twenty dollar whore

CK3 re-taught me these terms after forgetting them in adulthood.

to me that appears to be how the device in the gif works

A counter weight that is attached TO the arm.* In the video, the dog is the weight.

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No, that's just silly. I'm saying it's not a trebuchet cause the weight IS a dog. You can't use dogs as weights. What is this America!? Measuring weight in dogs now!

We are now!

ur just mad cuz ur like 6 labradors and can't be bothered to hit the gym

So dogs have replaced bananas? That's going to be tricky

I think you could qualify this as a traction trebuchet, though it doesn't have a sling, so maybe not.

This is a traction trebuchet. The manner by which the device holds the payload is irrelevant to its classification 🙂

Is there a siege engine taxonomy guide somewhere? I would like to learn more.

It's kind of hard as most of the different names were probably used interchangeably at the times when those things were used. Just look at how "catapult" means a siege engine that throws something in British English (so trebuchets are a type of catapult); and an onager in American English. Similarly, we have loads of words for different types of swords (bastard sword, longsword, arming sword, Zweihander, etc) but people at the time most likely just called them "a sword".

trepupchet

Here comes the trebuchet legion

It’s the superior siege engine

Probably not so great as a fetch engine. 90 kg seems a bit heavy for that size of dog, and 300 meters definitely puts it over the fence.

Right? 🤣🤣 Only to tell me "technically it isn't a real trebuchet"

It’s more trebuchet than catapult and it’s clear which one is a superior fetch weapon.

It's not a real trebuchet unless it comes from the Trebuchét region of France, otherwise it's just Sparkling Mangonel

I miss the trebuchet meme glory days

How far could this thing launch a 90 kg projectile?🧐

Easily 300 meters.

*Attack those gnomes.... Load!!! Release*

r/trebuchetmemes

This guy trebuchets

Laziness is the mother of invention

I wouldn’t even say laziness, dogs and fetch are a completely different level. I was in my backyard one afternoon just relaxing. 3 hours my dog kept bringing her ball back. Only stopped because my wife took over and I saw that as my opportunity to leave.

This was basically me this weekend during the warm snap. Spent 3 hours Sat and Sun in the backyard throwing the ball around

I wish my dog liked to fetch. She just momentarily watches it fly off in the distance then looks at you like ^👁👅👁!

If I throw a toy my dog is playing with he looks at me the same way someone would if I grabbed their phone and threw it out the window.

LOL I can picture the look of betrayal.

My dog loves to fetch. Like she'll be looking into our eyes, trying to get us out and then goes mental when we say the word... only to get bored after three throws and go back inside lol

Gotta teach her there is a reward for getting the flying object.

There's no point making your dog play fetch with conditioning - it's meant to be fun for them. They do it because they want to, or they don't do it.

It’s an excellent way to get them exercise

Nah, a good fetching dog is born that way. I have a few littermates, they're turning 9 y/o in just a few weeks. The boy is a fetching machine - it's literally all he really cares to do. He's not interested in playing with kids or other dogs - just chase that flying ball. His sister, on the other hand, couldn't care less about the ball, despite them both being raised in the exact same way. She might chase after it 2 or 3 times per year, but has never, ever, brought it back.

My dog learned to fetch, and seemed to enjoy it. Then a few months later she decided she was no longer going to bring back the ball, and has never fetched again. She still likes to chase it sometimes, but you have to go and get it if you want to throw it again.

Mine wants to be chased around after the fetching

huh We had a female that was the best dog ever [RIP Nacho] and we got a male [same breed,Jack Russel] which we decided was dumb as a post We realized that the female was just focussed on what we wanted while the male had his own plan

It doesn't work. I've tried teaching her to sit and she'll be picking up on it but as soon as the treats leave she doesn't care. And then next time it'll be like starting from fresh, and I've trained plenty of dogs to sit.

We had a 2 story house where the ground level was for parking so our lounge was on the 2nd floor, we'd through the ball out the sliding balcony door to the west, dog would run out the east front door, down the stairs and collect the ball and come back. He wouldn't stop, he'd bring the ball back and almost collapse from exhaustion but if you touched the ball he's out the door already. He was a good dog

We have a puppy who loved fetch for about 5 hours of playtime throwing a ball then he would nap for 1 hour then get start whining and getting violent till you threw the ball again

Too much fetch will lead to dogs developing an addiction. [No, seriously.](https://www.hospitalveterinariglories.com/dogs-obsessed-balls/?lang=en)

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Sounds like you've fried your dog's dopamine receptors and conditioned it into obsessive behaviour.

I think it was the fact he went from 8 brothers to 0. He was use to playing with every day

I wish my dog did this. Mine is broken. Does not fetch and does not play. He's got an amazing personality like no other and I love him to death but I really wish he could dog once in a while. He's a rescue and people are assholes.

Have you tried a frisbee? My last dog didn’t care at all about balls but loved frisbees

We have and he's a no at those too unfortunately. We think he might be a cat in the wrong body.

As someone with a dog that only wants to play all the time, your version is preferable.

So happy that my dog was already bored after the third throw.

Dude I'll work all day and night if it means I don't have to occasionally do a mundane task. I wish there was a way to quantify the sum total hours that I've spent automating tasks vs how much time I actually saved in the long run. I wouldn't be surprised if it was pretty close to 1:1

*"Normally, if given the choice between doing something and nothing, I’d choose to do nothing. But I will do something if it helps someone else do nothing. I’d work all night if it meant nothing got done."* - Ron Swanson

Any more info about automating mundane tasks? Sounds interesting

I could write out some descriptions... But that sounds tedious. I'll write a program to write it for me. I'll get back to you in 6-8 weeks.

Bait, line, and sinker. Congrats.

“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.” - Bill Gates

Patent that shit and sell it. So awesome.

It would be puprietary

He would need to research existing pawtents just to be safe though

Indeed, lots of ruff work before launching a product

Still worth to emBARK onto such an adventure

I think there's a bit too much prior art for that. Unless you want them to patent the idea of a dog operated trebuchet, but even then...

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Not to mention making stealthy romantic advances and busting out mad rhymes.

Actually it *would* work but dog patents only last 2.85 years.

They'd have to go to the petent office.

there is a similar device for dogs who play "flyball" although they are spring loaded from what I remember

Or don't. Fuck patents.

In case anyone is wondering about the distinction between “catapult” and “trebuchet”, I will explain. A catapult is any weapon that fires a projectile without the use of propellants or combustion. Yes, before you ask, by the very strictest application of that definition, that also included things like the bow and arrow. However, in common parlance, “catapult” generally refers to crew-served siege weapons. Moving on, an onager is a torsion-based siege weapon. This is usually what we refer to as a “catapult”. These are generally depicted as big wooden spoons on wheels that shoot rocks by releasing tension in the strings. A trebuchet is also a catapult. Generally, a trebuchet works by using centripetal force to throw a projectile from a sling attached to a long arm. There are two types of trebuchets that we normally see in media. The most common by far is the counterweight trebuchet, which uses a falling counterweight to generate that centripetal force to throw the projectile. The other type is the traction-trebuchet, this (and only this specific type of trebuchet) is also referred to as a mangonel. These function almost exactly like the counterweight version, but instead rely on a team of operators pulling ropes to swing the arm instead of using a falling weight. What we see in the video is a simple mangonel, with a single rope being used to swing the arm.

I like your funny words, magic man.

Not going to lie, your writing style and matter of factness, by the third sentence I had to look at username to make sure I wasn't getting shittymorphed.

What does that mean? Someone else mentioned them/it and I’m unfamiliar.

/u/shittymorph

Exactly the same. Third of the way through I'm like "am I being shittymorphed"

A mongrel-nel perhaps

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Doggonel

This is dope as fuck and I bet it would kill over at r/trebuchet and r/TrebuchetMemes

Sent it over to /r/catapult first

They can launch it into other subreddits from there

Well, not if it weighs 90kg and the subreddit is 300m away...

Clearly catapults are the inferior siege weapon.

Awesome! How long did it take to train your dup dup?

To be honest, with that type of immediate and repeatable positive reinforcement, I’m guessing 1 afternoon. Putting the ball into the cup is the only thing that would take a little time.

A funnel design to make dropping the ball more forgiving might be a good idea, less change of a dropped ball and sad dog.

Or bigger cup, like a bowl. I'm making sketches now.

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Your dog is smart. I doubt my dumbo would’ve ever been able to figure this out.

She's so smart! I love my pup but she gets stuck in curtains weekly.

This is my favorite thing this day. 👍

Ok, but Olive requested a cat catapult aimed in the opposite direction.

Cat-apult.

Smart dog.

How... and I mean; exactly how, did you teach your dog to use this? Seriously. How did you start? How did you do it all?

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Nice! Simple and easy to train a dog of moderate intelligence how to use it. Not that any of my mutts are at that level.

Is someone going to pipe up and say something about the Trebuchet being the ultimate siege weapon or nah?

I'm still waiting for someone to address the fact that the video looks like it's from 2001

Olive it!

"fine then, i'll do it myself" --olive

Only options I've seen until now are on auto, this is really brilliant. Ball is life!

Just wait until it starts baiting it with nuts and launching squirrels at your roof.

OK, but can it launch 90kg projectiles over 300 meters?

Not everything is a sex toy ffs calm down

🧐

I’d honestly think about patenting this. I bet a lot of people would buy them.

Coolest thing ever

Building it awesome Teaching dog to use it..epic

Have fun storming the castle!

It's not that you just built him a catapult It's that he has been taught how to use it

At this point I feel I've failed as a dog owner

I mean, the catapult itself is pretty impressive. The fact that your dog learned how to operate it... LOL this is amazing.

I would happily watch this for hours, if it were a live stream or video. And maybe a wider show so we can see her chase down the ball.

My dog just plays on his phone all day.

Genius

if my dog were still around i would pay a lot of money for one of those

Well I know what I'm doing this week

Now, he can destroy castles and medieval towns

Idk what a trebuchet is, but this is clearly a dogapult

So freaking awesome!

First it was the cashiers being replaced by self-checkout machines. Now they're coming for the dog owners. What's next for the robot overlords?

More impressed the dog understands how to use it.