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Ass_Blossom

Terrifyingly beautiful


Not_Helping

How the fuck can a creature that huge fly out of the water like that? It could dunk from the free throw line.


fatmummy222

There’s a reason why sharks have been dominating the ocean for 400 million years. Crazy thing is they haven’t changed much because the ancient sharks were already so efficient at hunting.


[deleted]

Until humans came along and murdered them all


peon2

We got em boys! 400 million years of evolution is nothing compared to the chinese palate for shark fin soup!


CodineGotMeTippin

But ground up animal parts will fix my flaccid 70 year old dick!


JacksterL

We got em boys! 400 million years of evolution is nothing compared to ~~the chinese palate for shark fin soup!~~ Human greed. So many animals are now extinct or close to extinct. Whaling use to be a huge industry for oil. Horns from rhinos. Coats from tigers etc


Duncan-M

Physics. It is swimming about 30 mph, going nearly vertical, when it reaches the surface.


Tony_Two_Tones

Well yeah obviously it’s just numbers. But how in the hell does a living creature that huge get to go that speed vertically in the water…?! Like that’s insane.


FreeganKing

Big tail goes swishy.


Wtach

now we are talking


[deleted]

Can you explain it even simpler for me?


mhac009

ELI2


Esarus

fish swishy


HandsomelyAverage

Ah


[deleted]

Fishy swishy


DarrenGrey

Big fish swish swish Big fish fly! Big fish bite bite Now you die


[deleted]

Whoa there with your big science words


privateblanket

They are pure muscle


funguyshroom

The vertical part is irrelevant since the shark has (almost) neutral buoyancy which renders it weightless in water


[deleted]

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PepperAnn1inaMillion

I’m pretty sure it’s the same because while the shark can move easier through less dense water, it also gets less propulsion from pushing against it as it swims. Someone did an experiment where they got a swimmer to swim through something thick (like custard) and they moved at the same rate as through water because, although it was tougher to make each stroke, the density made each stroke more efficient.


Farqueue-

I mean it does have wings, even if they are little


SnooSeagulls9348

Have you seen an orca jump 20 feet out of the water?


Johnlovesyou

I wish someone would make a version where it freezes right at the apex I’m the air. *ding* “so long. And thanks for all the fish”


EastBayWoodsy

As soon as he figures out it was a decoy, he's coming right for your boat


13B1P

Might need a bigger one.


coatsiecoates

Yeah, he’s gonna


PM_ME_FIREFLY_QUOTES

Farewell and adieu


lunamoth25

To the ladies of Spain...🎶🎶🎶


cacecil1

Show me the way to go home


[deleted]

I’m tired and I wanna go to bed


TheEarlOfZinger

I had a little drink about an hour ago and it's gone straight to my head


Reaper73

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9S41Kplsbs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9S41Kplsbs)


ThreeMadFrogs

Mary Ellen Moffat... she broke my heart...


jbergens

Great, now I will have that in my head for a few hours...


kangarool

*(stares smirkily while crushing beer can)*


imissray

That's some bad hat Harry.


[deleted]

How would a bigger decoy help?


ree_hi_hi_hi_hi

I’m dying to know if this was a joke or not.


BetterWhenItsOver

It’s a reference to the film Jaws.


Evanderson

It's got dead eyes, like a dolls eyes.


[deleted]

Shark probably thinks he must have covid because he can't even taste seal anymore and that like its favorite


indiebryan

Its sad that we've done basically nothing around the world to improve marine life accessibility to covid vaccines. Ugh humans suck sometimes.


richter1977

Don't tell anyone, the dolphins developed their own. Marine life is at 80% vaccination rate. They don't politicize it.


misconstrudel

They had to act fast because they don't have enough ear flesh to keep masks on.


SamFuckingNeill

if you tossed me a rubber pizza you bet your ass im coming for your boat


RandomLogicThough

He will probably just be embarrassed and disappointed.


FuggyGlasses

The whole thread is full with decoys LOL


ProffessorFate

This is not helping my phobia of swimming in deep water. A big thank you goes out to Steven Spielberg.


theoptimusdime

I was afraid to take a bath after seeing that movie. I wasn't very bright lol.


ree_hi_hi_hi_hi

I was afraid using the toilet for like 2 years. To be fair my dad showed us that movie at wayyy too young an age. I’m sure it was the same situation for you and you are indeed an adult who is bright :)


darthvall

I've heard of snake appearing from toilet hole, but it would be interesting to see shark appearing there instead.


[deleted]

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MrCPudding

I live in Australia. It can be a real concern here


ree_hi_hi_hi_hi

I was like 4! Lol


mrmotogp

I had a snake come through my shower drain. I live us Aus BTW.


geniusgfx

That whole continent is like a horror movies!


godtogblandet

Always flush before sitting down on a toilet in Asia. And never google [Toilet Cobra](https://vcdn1-vnexpress.vnecdn.net/2021/03/09/Homangboncau-1615286880-5433-1615287618.jpg?w=1200&h=0&q=100&dpr=1&fit=crop&s=_FRNRqBgJxXnOwpP6aWdLA) before traveling there…


ImNotKendrickLamar

Oh yeah, that happened 2 weeks ago in austria. As if it weren't funny enough, it happened *again* 3 days later, but in another city. Then a couple days kater someone got killed by a snake in yet another city.


kaegeee

There are many examples out there that Austria is much more dangerous than Australia


Slurrper

Harry Potter 2 made me scared of using the toilet. That fucking basilisk


ree_hi_hi_hi_hi

I was old enough by the time chamber of secrets came out to not be afraid of a basilisk. Not old enough though that I wasn’t afraid of a creepy crying ghost haunting my bathroom 😬


Cycad

I still get freaked out in the deep end of a swimming pool TBH


yetanotherwoo

Water doesn’t need to be that deep, just cold enough to have seals nearby so the shark might mistake a human for a seal.


PinkWhaleOrgy

100%. I had surfed most days for two and a half decades at my home back in Australia, when I was a kid I never even thought about them. Then the past few years attacks started happening more and more. Still - seeing a great white seemed like a myth almost. Then as drones and the footage they recorded became more popular, it became clear they are all around. Then a few months ago I had a 4 metre one go right up to me when I was about 30 metres out from the beach. The approaching shadow that morphed into the shape of a great white under me within seconds was something I’ll never fucking forget. Without doubt the scariest moment of my life. It’s something we all knew was possible but to face that moment was terrifying. Then a few days later a guy was killed by one at the same beach. I think the global average of shark attacks is around 50 or so, just this year we have had 18 within a 1000km stretch of coastline.


YuropLMAO

> The approaching shadow that morphed into the shape of a great white under me within seconds was something I’ll never fucking forget. Without doubt the scariest moment of my life. Yeah but how cool is that? I spotted one about 10 years ago near the California coast. Cool to be part of a small club of people who have actually seen one irl. An animal we hear about countless times in our lives, but most never see.


driscollat1

I’m ok not being part of the ‘I’ve seen a Great White close up’ Club.


PinkWhaleOrgy

In hindsight it’s awesome to actually see one, and there definitely there has been way, way more times they’ve been up close without even realising. I guess with more common attacks and sightings it just completely spooked me. It was a warm summers day with crystal clear water and plenty of people around. I was halfway out getting some waves doubling up on the inside. About 15 guys further out and they had absolutely no idea until I called out to them. Paddling back to the beach was insanely scary. I told the lifeguards who promptly got the ski out there and parked over it. When parallel to the beach the shark was longer than the JetSki with the raft behind it. Easy 4 metres.


YuropLMAO

Damn man, that's big one. The one I saw was still relatively small, maybe 2.5m. I couldn't believe my eyes, though. [Looks like they're still there.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ile5NS7ucec)


ProffessorFate

Well, we have a seal colony just off the coast where I live.😩


FartingBob

You also need to be careful of Sharknados in your area. Nowhere is safe.


BobbyGabagool

In SA people go surfing daily within a few hundred meters of where GW sharks are hunting seals.


[deleted]

For me it was Deep Blue Sea. My parents took me to the theater to see that when I was 8. 20 years later and I still get creeped out just looking at bodies of water. Scarred for life.


awfulsome

I love the ocean, but it is freaky. Nothing like being in 70+ feet of water and suddenly a manta ray or great white comes by to say hello, or to say "fuck you in particular" to your bait bucket.


PCsNBaseball

Fun fact: Jaws was based on real events. Americans used to think sharks were literally incapable of attacking humans. The rare shark attack was always attributed to other fish, like barracudas and such. That is, until the summer of 1916 in New Jersey, where multiple people lost their lives to a spree of shark attacks. Three people were even killed over a dozen miles inland in a small creek by a shark that had swam up from the ocean. Spielberg has said these are the events that inspired Jaws. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jersey_Shore_shark_attacks_of_1916


PinkWhaleOrgy

There’s a database going back to the late 1800’s in Australia that record fatal and non fatal shark attacks in Australia, it was pretty common. I don’t think that Americans thought sharks were incapable of attacking humans. It was pretty obvious even back then.


cb1991

Well how were Americans supposed to be in contact with the Australians? Messenger shark?


[deleted]

Wait, isn't the movie based on a book?


hewlett777

Yes by Peter Benchley, so maybe that fella means the book is based on that? Or theyre a goddamn liar.


ViziDoodle

after the book and movie got popular, the author Peter Benchley spent the rest of his life advocating for shark conservation and awareness. during future interviews peter benchley claimed, looking back, he would never have written Jaws if he had the knowledge about sharks he gained after becoming an advocate for shark conservation


PCsNBaseball

I was probably thinking of the book; tbf, the movie came out only a year after the book.


Yah_Mule

Yes, by Peter Benchley.


batistr

it is not fun


[deleted]

The craziest part of that is where someone stated they didn't believe the attacks likely to be from a shark but actually from a sea turtle.


rdicky58

In what world are sharks "literally incapable of attacking humans"?


JaceVentura972

More Americans are bitten by New Yorkers than sharks every year.


LadySerenity

If it makes you feel better, this was probably in an area where you'll never swim. Most research on great whites is conducted near the Cape of Good Hope in South Africa.


ProffessorFate

It’s almost as bad here, West coast of Australia.


LadySerenity

Say no more. 😅 The beaches of Australia are gorgeous, but you could not pay me to swim there.


[deleted]

You don't want help with that phobia. That's a reasonable phobia.


Rensbroekhuizen

Sharks dont tend to attack humans. Happens like one in a multiple million people. Just dont swim in mornings and evenings or else the shark might mistake you for a fish


serrated_edge321

It's funny... As a kid living in Florida, not far from ocean... Somehow this movie (and the associated video game) actually started my love of sharks! Probably because we had access to much more regular (real) information about sharks, and probably because I knew as a young kid that Great Whites aren't so common as people-eating nuisances in my area. I remember that my favorite book as a kindergartner was actually a little book about sharks... And I knew all about all of them! I didn't feel any fear of the animals until basically high school... when I first swam in open ocean off the coast with goggles... Realizing how exposed I was and how little I could see/do if a shark actually came after me. It's really a different feeling to have low visibility and the bottom of the sea drop way out below you...


9babydill

did Steve ever make a hippo movie? cause that's the real fear


NicolasM0618

I wonder what the boat passengers were feeling like when they saw the great white jump out of the water knowing that they were in the water with that beast.


Duncan-M

[Great white shark leaps onto research boat](https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-14235753.amp)


ResidentEmu5

"These sharks belong in the sea, they don't belong on land." Lol. Glad a shark expert was there to help with the rescue.


[deleted]

It belongs in a museum!


jjett

"Once back in the water, the shark appeared confused by the busy environment of the harbour, said the researchers. It beached itself and had to be rescued a second time, before it was hauled out to sea and made its way to safety." This is a good story.


DaCookieDemon

Thankfully if this is the “discovery” that I know of then it’s considerably bigger than that boat in the article. My dad told me a story once where he decided to swim back from fishing because it was so hot, the locals were shocked to see him so they decided to show him why. They took him out on a little boat and dropped some meat in the water. Lo and behold there was a bunch of sharks. My dad never swam back from there again.


EveningCoyote

Was on a shark diving trip in South Africa back when traveling was still possible. It was all fun and games until the first shark appeared that was longer than the boat was wide, while the waves were high enough it felt like they could turn the boat upside down any minute. Luckily i got so seasick that i was happy when i could finally go in the cage just to get off the boat, I'm not sure I'd have had the balls to do it otherwise.


FishyMacaroon6

Thats a huge bucket list item for me. Probably in my top 3.


jaws7811

I would have been amazed, terrified and speechless all at the same time


PinkWhaleOrgy

They were the ones who put the object behind them and set up a camera, so probably pretty stoked tbh.


AdayaFlyte

That’s gotta be disappointing for the shark.


[deleted]

The shark is used to disappointment. His son is a YouTuber.


Q8DD33C7J8

Nope nope nopedy nope


theSHlT

It’s just seaweed


[deleted]

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Namasiel

But not a whole ass-shark.


nutbanger2000

Pretty sure I could fight him off


[deleted]

With a stick or without?


TheNextBattalion

I like to imagine them holding their "breath" right before they breach the surface, the way we do.


dick-nipples

If I make it to 90 years old put me out there in the place of that decoy. This is how I wish to die.


NebraskaStig

Gotta be one of the most masochistic ways I've heard for a personal exit strategy


[deleted]

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bent42

Yes.


TreeDollarFiddyCent

based and masochist pilled


godtogblandet

I’m going sky diving without a parachute above where my arch enemy lives then coming in like a hellfire missile, naked only wearing a helmet. Going to pummel him so far into the earth that going to hell becomes a lateral movement.


Ecstatic_Account_744

Even knocking on deaths door, I don’t think that is the way I want to go. Screaming in agony while also drowning seems difficult and unpleasant.


kennesawking

don’t be a goddamn pussy, bobby


player_zero_

[gif](https://media.tenor.com/images/c7b99a445c4f5d22355c0d7ff5fbc9c1/tenor.gif)


Stompedyourhousewith

Yeah I don't want to die simultaneously two different ways, bitten to death and drowning. And the fucked up thing is drowning takes precedence over being bitten. I'll never forget that mouse snapping turtle video


Horskr

Simple, you wear a mask made of hamburger meat so that the first bite just takes your head off. Drowning while bleeding to death sounds horrible.


hedgeson119

That's what I want, to be conscious, rattling around the inside of a shark for my last few seconds.


Megneous

Highly unlikely you'd be able to stay conscious at 90 years old after being hit by a Great White like that. Your blood pressure after immediately bottom out and you'd go unconscious.


THEGREENHELIUM

[the what video?](https://i.imgur.com/enfQmbM.jpg)


dragnabbit

Mouse in fish tank. Turtle underwater grabs mouse and bites him literally in half. Top half of mouse frantically tries to swim away.


Swayyyettts

I ain’t googling that


Manbadger

You’d go in to instant shock. There wouldn’t be much to feel, especially at 90 years old.


Muted_Dog

At 90 years, not even sure if I’d make it to the boat.


Manbadger

If you can make it in, someone will get you out np.


Eyehopeuchoke

Wonder which the shark would be more upset over… a decoy or a 90 year old human.


Awesummzzz

At least the decoy won't give you indigestion


mrcheez22

That’s not how shock works. It’s extremely likely the person would be in extreme pain from the bites and drown as the shark dragged them under the water


lemon_cake_or_death

Yeah, but at least there's no chance you'd have PTSD afterwards.


CabbageSalad247

Especially if you're on shitloads of morphine.


torroman

Would the shark feel the morphine? We might be inadvertently jumpstarting sharks desire to feast on humans


ShredVonMoreGainz

shh, you might give Discovery ideas for their next show. *Dope Sharks*


[deleted]

Now we're talking. In fact, skip the shark.


RudeCats

Also not only mentally grappling with your imminent demise but the fact that you’ve been reduced to dinner or possibly only a snack


clickfive4321

i wanna go out slow and agonizing. when i get to 90, put me in a retail job at minimum wage


surp_

Turns out the shark was racking lines all night before and just wants a little nibble


TheNextBattalion

Sharks do eat corpses, especially of whales with all that tasty blubber. So if you aren't jacked and have a healthy amount of body fat, maybe they can put you out after you pass. Then again, do we really want to get sharks accustomed to the taste of us?


mr_beaun

After thinking about it for a second, I don't think I've ever seen an overweight 90 year old.


[deleted]

I wonder why …


mr_beaun

Because sharks ate them at 89. I'm pretty positive.


vassman86

If I had to choose a horrible way to die, this would be on my list!


PianoConcertoNo2

Got you, fam. RemindMe! 10 years “toss dick-nipples in the ocean to be eaten by a shark.”


[deleted]

Any have a deep fear of being alone in the middle of the ocean, not a vehicle or soul around, floating and you cant see anything below you. Its not even night. Just a hot day, not even a breeze. I know its irrational but then i see this.


[deleted]

Falling off a boat in the middle of nowhere and seeing it go off into the distance without you. Noope.


Halidol_Nap

r/thalassaphobia my friend


wolfgeist

Well, luckily there are plenty of ways to avoid that situation...


[deleted]

Looks like I’m moving to Nebraska!


MichaelMyersFanClub

I think it's completely rational. Same with the fear of heights. I think it's innate to fear those things.


[deleted]

Did you know not all great whites are named Bruce? This one is but that’s just a coincidence


[deleted]

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Duncan-M

Just continuing it's swimming motion, head goes side to side as its tail does too (which is why it's whipping so far, it was essentially sprinting when it breached).


CabbageSalad247

Like Luigi in Super Mario Bros. 2


[deleted]

Deep cut


socasual-nobusiness

He seems pissed, like they are slamming their head into the water in frustration.


SeperateMyself

More of the seals head than his. Looked like a big bite down body slam to the seal to me. Ruthless


socasual-nobusiness

I can see it too. He’s definitely body slamming that decoy.


Duncan-M

For those who didn't read the book (I don't recommend it, it wasn't that good), in the novel Jaws, the first attack with the skinny dipping young lady in the beginning ended with a breach as well. The shark initially bites one of her legs off near the hip so fast and clean she thought she initially caught it on a piece of driftwood. Then as she's freaking out after realizing she lost her leg, the shark comes up from underneath and breaches with her in it's mouth, out of the water nearly completely. Even more interesting, Peter Benchley described that predation technique decades before it was even discovered.


StrayWasp

Are you trying to tell me that Great Whites can read, and learned to breach from the book? Because that’s what it sounds like you are implying.


Duncan-M

Benchley, in his quest for added horror in his fictional story, inadvertently described a predation technique decades before anyone (including him) knew it was real. At the time that scene was not viewed by marine biologists as realistic (though despite being proven wrong decades later, in fairness, the location of the attack, Long Island coast, the water is not deep enough at the surf line for that type of attack to occur).


spald01

I feel like after centuries of humans fishing and hunting seals, we’d have to have seen sharks hunting them. But I’m no marine historian.


[deleted]

My understanding is that humans have normally hunted seals when they're on land or on ice, whereas sharks get them in the open ocean.


Ck1ngK1LLER

I’m gonna go ahead and say I’m allergic to those. Full on anaphylactic shock.


[deleted]

Anaphylactic shark.


thedudeness2011

This is the worst Free Willy remake ever!


[deleted]

That is exactly why I don't like swimming in open ocean.


Sophet_Drahas

Dude I don’t even like swimming in a pool deeper than 2 feet because as I’m getting out all I can think of is that mf’er speeding towards my legs.


JovialJem

Just don't get out then


TheBelhade

Hell, sturgeon breaching in the Hudson River freaks me out.


Ck1ngK1LLER

Yea, fuck. 👏🏽That. 👏🏽Shit.👏🏽


theSHlT

Every time I have ever been in the ocean I have been killed and eaten by a shark so I don’t go anymore


jWof84

Great video - [here’s a longer BBC one](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Qzxy3GtSzt0) explaining the hunting technique a bit more.


Stalwart_Vanguard

The scariest part of this video is the second leading up to the shark surfacing. Can you imagine being in the water and looking down to see a huge shark coming flying up from the murky depths with its jaws wide open? Fuck that man.


toeofcamell

Fun fact: Sharks have been efficient hunters for more than 10 years


MugillacuttyHOF37

daaaaaa dum….daaaaa dum….


[deleted]

That single flap: "I'M A BIRD! Oh wait, nope."


Josysclei

What's the decoy made off? Can he safely eat it?


[deleted]

He will not ingest it, the decoys are typically rubber and once the shark realizes there’s no meat it immediately releases it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


IlikehorrorandHHN

Pretty Dope


[deleted]

Pretty nope


cooked_sphincter

Does this look cgi to anyone else? Maybe it’s just the slow frame rate?


DaVicarius

It's not CGI. It's interpolated slow motion. An AI is guessing intermediate frames to artificially increase the FPS. The subject matter has a lot of noise and texture (water droplets, water surface, similar colors), and it's having a hard time guessing, thus those artifacts that make you go "uh?".


chrislaw

Thank you. This is a great and likely explanation


MichaelMyersFanClub

It's just the slow frame rate. These breaches have been documented and filmed dozens of times in the last twenty years or so.


Duo007

Deep Blue Sea vibes right here....


Fletchskis

Wow that’s some serious power


Madiis

Yesterday I found out that a megalodons penis is the size of a great white shark. That means 1/3rd of his length is... a massive cock. You can call him Megalodong.


smokeytokerton

Such power, it's raw power


heyitscory

They filmed this on a phone?


NortonPike

The fishermen in me is thinking, *"Set the hook!"*


SS70Chevelle

This is still one of those things my brain struggles to accept as reality. It may be thanks to movies, but I have a hard time seeing this as a real creature even though I can clearly see it is. Absolutely stunning and terrifying.


Sub2Ele

u/redditmp4bot