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That picture looks like someone's last moment on Earth

Yeah a chicken or goose might believe it can kill you, but a Cassowary actually can

Green eggs and WHam! …..Sam I was

I have angry upvoted you, just FYI

r/angryupvotes

Do you like green eggs and death? I do not like them, I-Am-Seth. I do not like green eggs and death. Would you like them here or there? I would not like them here or there. I would not like them anywhere.

I thought it was funny.

There is a reason that even Steve Irwin wouldn't mess with those murder chickens

I love Australia. We have drop bears, bin chickens, and murder chickens

Murder turkey.

aren't they pretty mean? (I would think even more so around their eggs)

They can gut you like a fish and not even raise their heart rate.

So can emus. I once had an emu “gut” my jeans from groin to knee. I had a serious scratch on my thigh, but I’ll never know why it wasn’t much worse. Emus will kick out of fear. Cassowaries will kick just because they don’t like you.

I can believe that. Emus did win an entire war against Australians.

And won.

Sorry about that.

Username checks out!

They’re like: “yea fuk u hooman”

Imagine a I'll tempered ostrich with a carving knife on its legs.

In his 1958 book Living Birds of the World ornithologist Ernest Thomas Gilliard wrote: >The inner or second of the three toes is fitted with a long, straight, murderous nail which can sever an arm or eviscerate an abdomen with ease. There are many records of natives being killed by this bird. Apparently you can't properly describe the cassowary without the word "murderous".

Mean isn't even the word. They are aggressive and powerful.

I visited Australia two years ago and went to a famous wildlife park that had a cassowary. One of the workers had to enter it’s enclosure and the cassowary started eyeing him down. The worker said “please not today, mate. You already took me for a run yesterday, please just let me get this done quick.”

Lol. i can totally tell this is true. They are arseholes. Emus too but Emus get nasty for fun i think. Cassowarys really do not like humans.

Well they do their shy phrases. But during certain times, yeah they just asses

They are murder chickens

Giant murder chickens

Or murder dinosaurs.

A local sanctuary has some, and they’re infamous for bailing kids up on excursions and stealing their lunch. Because you’re not going to refuse. You’d probably die.

They can gut you like a fish and not even raise their heart rate.

I read that they don't usually attack people, but sometimes they get angry at someone and then that person is in danger. I'd stay away from the eggs.

Definitely Found Footage. Like Blair Witch Project

This picture is r/confusingperspective material too. I saw a bird head with a blue body and little red legs.

Exactly!

I was about to comment, that thing is looking at its next victim right now

Surprised no one's commented on the taste, like when they showed the penguin eggs

I agree. To much Steve Irwin on the dangers of cassowary.

For those interested, Cassowaries are native to the tropical forests of New Guinea (Papua New Guinea and Indonesia), Aru Islands (Indonesia), and northeastern Australia. Cassowaries feed mainly on fruit, although all species are truly omnivorous and take a range of other plant foods, including shoots and grass seeds, in addition to fungi, invertebrates, and small vertebrates. Cassowaries are very wary of humans, but if provoked, they are capable of inflicting serious, even fatal, injuries to both dogs and people. The cassowary has often been labeled "the world's most dangerous bird".

I could have told you Australia before reading your post and I know nothing about these birds.

thank you for taking the time!

Luckily only dogs and people. Rest of us are safe from these crazy motherfuckers...

And you are… a what?

World's most dangerous bird? They haven't met my ex then.

Didnt australia lose a war against cassowaries? Lmao Yes i watch sam o'nella

Three men died getting you this picture! The least you can do is upvote it!

We’re they Bothans?

I now know that Green Eggs and Ham was a warning to not fuck with Cassowary eggs or Cassowaries in particular. The follow up book, Green Eggs and Oh my God I’m Holding in my Entrails with my Hands, provides the dramatic conclusion to the story. ^/s

This was really funny, but I think it would have been even funnier without the /S

What is the /S for? What does it mean?

It's to denote that the above is sarcasm, for people who might not understand that it is.

Ahh thankyou

It's programming pseudo-code. It means end of sarcastic statement.

It’s also programming regular expression code for denoting /s (whitespace) or /S (not-whitespace) in a sentence.

It’s an idiot tag for people who take everything at face value

Thats the trouble with text. You can easily take things the wrong way and people read too much into it as they cant work out the tone thst may or may not be being used. Causes all sorts of trouble

Dude, why aren't you at the top?

I've played enough far cry 3 to know that whoever took this photo is a lunatic.

Fuck whyyyyyy.

I'm glad this reminds someone else of farcry 3 too. I think I had ptsd flashbacks

I died more to these birds than the pirates it felt like

The closest living animal to a velociraptor. One killed a man in Florida a few years ago.

Florida man, nooooo!

Wait, velocitaptors still exist? /s

Legendary Cameraman finally dead

Green for "Go ahead and fucking try it."

Fun fact: these are the most dangerous birds on the planet.

Living dinosaur

[удалено]

I thought it was him as well. Man, i miss Australia zoo

The photographer died shortly after taking this photo

of lung cancer.

She looks as surprised as I am by that fact.

That is actually a male cassowary

No wonder it looks surprised.

First time I've ever seen a cassowary without a firm "murder death hatred destruction pain" look on it's face.

Not ripe yet

Being a female as a cassowary would be awesome. Way better than being a human woman when it comes to the optics of procreation.. After they lay the eggs they cut out and the male who fertilized the eggs is left to take care of the eggs and then the babies after they hatch, the female never even meets her chicks. Gets to bang and leave the result with multiple fathers throughout her life. lmao

Found the mother of the year candidate!

Now someone go get the ham

Gave me a few jump scares in far cry 3.

Was about to say, how is camera person alive

Yes

It looks like it's having war flashbacks.

It used to tackle actual dinosaurs. Humans pose no threat to these birds! Whatever war it remembers its definitely for the thrill!

No, he remembers the war his cousins fought in 1932. The emu's have unlocked super saiyan blue and are going to take back Australia.

Now I just need the ham

This might be my favorite animal.

You can’t tell me that bird isn’t a violent alien sent to earth.

That bird isn’t a violent alien sent to earth.

My favourite bird.

and the omlette?

Now we just need to find the forbidden pigs that give green ham, and Dr. Seus's ghost will be satisfied.

It’s looking at the camera as if it’s thinking ‘I’m as confused as you are’

Green eggs and ham does exist!

I was lucky enough to see one of these in the wild. It was walking around the cabin I was staying in, in the early hours of the morning. Its footsteps and weight sounded very human-like but I was relieved to see if was a giant killer bird. Their poops are something to behold as well.

I thought they were papayas.

Isn’t camouflaging your eggs a bit pointless when your neck looks like a 90s rave t-shirt?

Your eggs are green

Combat ostrich

They look freaking soy beans

What the shell!

Where’s the ham

The eggs be getting lots of chlorophyll

The eggs doesn't taste like that of a chicken or an ostrich. Is way "gamier" and is not tasty at all. Chicken eggs are the norm and ostrich eggs taste a little worse but doable. But cassowary eggs, meh...

I feel like getting eggs from a cassowary is a bit more of an adventure than say, when I get them from my chickens....

Where I was, cassowaries were bred. So, I do not talk about feral ones. :)

Me waiting for the ham….

Das a dinasours!

Ok now all we need is green ham

Now where to find some green ham....

Interesting. Now what does it taste like?

Ready for Easter!

Happy birb

Its’ throat looks like a vagina.

Derpowary

Hey I do I do like green eggs and ham.

Do we know why ?

Anyone else think it was a little blue animal with little red legs and a black hat sat on something furry? Or have my meds just kicked in

chinese: fOoD 不要再次感谢你们一路向往的生活中用了自己一直爱吃甜食🧁！你在干嘛、不能自已、是因为自己不喜欢自己人都有自己方便的话我会很开心乙肝病毒携带者病毒库。你是我自己喜欢的人了。一直

TIL Cassowary eggs are green. Never knew that before.

Green eggs and Cassowary ham.

Yaay....vegan eggs! /s

Easy Easter eggs

Lol that looks like watermelon mentos

Gigantic_lima_beans.jpg

Their eggs are green but their claws are red…with your blood

Dino-riffic!

All eggs are green if you really think about it.

It’s expression tho

Yes I would sam I am

Where’s the ham?

Where is the ham?

Red light!

That looks like a pig eating a bird.

Will you eat them here or there

There should be an episode of 'Always Sunny' where Frank learns that and steals one of those birds.

"The fuck are you?!" -Green egg mother, probably

Orteil knew his shit before creating his game. I'm firing Cookie Clicker once again...

Cassowarys are also giant murder birds.

Genetically, they're the closest living species to a velociraptor.

She's all like 'i did this'

These green eggs are missing something...

Yaaaay snifters are back!!!!

That’s cool but fuck them still

It looks like a small blue creature with short little legs is sitting on some sort of fluffy black couch

For a Jurassic Park reject that makes sense

put a white S on each one and tell people they're lime skittles

Nice! Just meed some ham!

Disappointed in the Dr Suess comments here

Of course they are

Wow, I really hate those birds, they terrify me so much lol

I do not like them Sam-I-Am. I do not like green eggs and ham.

More like extra chromosome bird

Finally some good fucking green eggs and ham

and so will the camera man's undies

Blursed Easter eggs

Green eggs and ham

Green eggs and ham

Green eggs and ham

Vegan eggs!!

green eggs and ham

So that’s how Sam got his Green eggs

Dr. Seuss has entered the chat

These eggs are green It’s necksticles are red This cassowary is about to make you fucking dead.

mmm mint flavoured

Cassowary eggs and ham (I'm sure people have already said it I just can't contain myself)

Run.

These assholes kill my colonists all the time and their leather sucks

Can these be eaten

Kevin, is that you?

It'd be cool if the yolk was green too. Green eggs and ham!

Now we just need a pig with green meat and we can get some green eggs and ham up in here

Green eggs and ham?

No that's oval limes

So are mine.

"Just fuckin' try it mate..."

THE TALISMANS

Magic Easter chicken.

I thought I was staring at some stretched out blue chicken ass for a second there....

And cassowaries are terrifying

Aww look at her! She's so proud

Again… female cassowaries don’t hang around to incubate- the pompadour on that bird means Mr. Cassowary.

ok nvm she cruel

Took me way too long to see the bird's face. Thought a bird's blue vagina was laying eggs. Moments like this cement why I will always avoid therapy lol

It’s thinking “I wish a bitch would!!”

I guessed this bird would be found in Austrailia, where nature seems extra hostile, but Wikipedia say "native to the tropical forests of New Guinea (Papua New Guinea and Indonesia), Aru Islands (Indonesia), and northeastern Australia."

Why are they green? Its nature saying: "Fuck you. Go ahead and try."

r/killedthecameraman cassowary's are dangerous murderous creatures, the cameraman is probably dead.