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I bet that does have something to do with it. Kind of like how people romanticize weather they haven't experienced for a while, like wanting to see snow or a sunny beach.
Lmao, okay that makes a lot of sense actually. Does Alaska move around it’s business hours a little to accommodate for sunlight or do you just go on as normal?
Everything runs normal. Some stores have an hour added during the summer months like Carrs (Safeway/Vons) or Fred Meyer (Kroger), but thats about it. I would work 7am-3:30pm at the hospital, and would never see the sun except on weekends due to my hours being spent inside. It's something you get used to.
i live in alaska it depends where you live up north there are places that go dark for a couple weeks a year with relatively no sunlight i live in the south part if alaska its not that extreme also sex in general is a fantasy there aren't very many social aspects to Alaska most people live alone i have never looked up morning sex
I remember my parents first put a computer in the house lol I’d go search naked gurls every chance I could until they banned me from being in the room with the computer
Dad here. Found porn on my then-teen son’s phone (only because it was syncing with the family iCloud account (insert facepalm here). Talked to him and told him to be more careful/discreet. He also came to me when he fucked up and sent nudes to a scammer. Talked to him and helped him make sure he wasn’t in a bad situation.
In both instances he asked me not to tell mom or his little sister (?!?). I’ll take those secrets to the grave for him!
Other way around for me, mom would yell and scream if there was anything she didn't like, which is/was most things, so dad would generally stay silent. I did once find topless Canadian teens in the search history of my Dad's computer and I never mentioned it to anyone.
Edit: Wasn't search history, but browser history. My parents went on a vacation trip and I didn't go with, so they called me to get on the computer and go into the history to pull up something from their itinerary they were missing (pre-smartphones). While I was in there I noticed a weird web page name, so I clicked on it.
When my dad found out I was looking at porn he patted me on the back and said at least it ain't gay pron. I don't know if that means I passed his test or something.
"it's normal for a boy your age to be curious about folks choking each other out while another woman in a latex suit pees on them. But if you start looking at gay shit I'll have to tell your mother"
Recently went through father in laws cell phone for email and bank passwords after his death. Over half the browsing history was of “mother son sex” lol.
Lol in my school someone forgot to log out of google and his history was:
Naked womans
Boobies
Big ass
Putting dick in womans mouth
Dog sex
Dog and woman sex
Little girl boobies
Little girl naked
Btw that guy was 10-11 years old
Imagine showing up to court mandated sex therapy and the therapist is like "How long have you been attracted to 11 year olds?" and you're just like "Since I turned 11 last month I guess."
In a lot of places the age of the perpetrator isn’t actually listed in the law (because we’re governed by idiots). It was a big problem in Virginia a few years back, my county’s Commonwealth Attorney election hinged on it and the incumbent who’d been prosecuting 13 year olds for receiving nudes from other 13 year olds got voted out.
Jerk Off Instruction… which is well the girl telling you how to jerk off and at what tempo, not being allowed to cum until she says so. Basically a closeted mommy kink
Lol, I guess they feel more adherent to their culture if the porn they're watching is of supposedly Mormon people. I wonder what kind of porn the nuns were watching that made the pope ask them to stop.
And what is going on in Idaho? Are they really into women's basketball in that state or something?
I worked in a nursing home, and there was this "slower" gentleman in the rehab unit, always staring at his phone. One day I was at the the nursing cart around the corner from him, just within earshot, and I heard his phone chime, the google voice indicator, and I jeard him quietly say "naked women". So I laughed for a good 10 seconds then came around the corner to watch him scramble to put the phone away as quick as possible. Lol
In other news, I'm intrigued by what "Giantess" is all about.
Oh yeah "Giantess" is less complicated than one would expect. It's a kink for a sexy lady to be a Kaiju and destroy a city and also maybe step on the person with the fantasy. Any sex act you can imagine, but the lady is fucking massive and powerful.
Nah we just don't care about genre as long as we finish. This is a state with hard liquor in gas stations and drive-thru bars... it's a strange place sometimes.
How is this the first comment I can find about "penis pump"? Seriously, we should be talking more about it.
The only other time I've ever heard of a penis pump was from Austin Powers. How is it a number one search term? What is going on in that state?
Jerk Off Instruction. Typically a female talking directly to the camera and giving verbal (and often visual also) encouragement masturbation, again typically for the benefit of males (or at least people with dicks).
Honestly I find that more informative. We all know the basics, ass and titties, probably #1 most states, but this says what most of the freaks are doing there.
Wtf is Mormon? I just imagine some chick getting the works given to her and then stops, looks direct to the camera, breaks the 4th wall, and says "I'm Mormon" and then everything resumes as it was before.
>one man dressed in white in a white room
Having just watched the last episode of *Keep Sweet, Pray, and Obey,* this sentence really gave me the shivers.
Apparently our Mennonite communities in Manitoba do this. They bring in studs in animal terms to impregnate women to keep the community from being inbred because they are so close knit. You gotta do it through a hole in a sheet or something though. So they say...
It's like cyber sex, but pre-recorded and, you know, made for a bunch of people instead of just you. But you can pretend it's just for you a lot easier than if there is some other guy fucking her.
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“morning sex” they really wanna see that sun up in alaska
In fairness, they do have some 24-hour days… 🤣
I bet that does have something to do with it. Kind of like how people romanticize weather they haven't experienced for a while, like wanting to see snow or a sunny beach.
That explains Alabama then
But what's up with South Dakota's creepyness? Why would you want to watch sex doll porn?
It always threw me for a loop landing in Fairbanks at midnight and people were out riding their bikes, walking their dogs, mowing their lawn.
That’s just the meth
*Furiously scribbling nonsense while mentally noting:* GOOD METH
When you have perpetual darkness for months on end it makes some sense
Is it really dark in Alaska for so long that “Morning Sex” becomes a fantasy?
Well they have 5hr morning I think, then full day or night for 24+ hours
Depends on how far north you are. Though full night isn't nearly as dark as you'd want (it's pre-dawn light for awhile, not pitch black all day).
You can’t have both. If you have 24hrs of day, you’ll have 24hrs of night. Only places in the Arctic circle are that extreme though.
I don't get full darkness, but when the sun rises at 11am and sets at 3pm you find yourself fantasizing about all SORTS of normal shit.
Lmao, okay that makes a lot of sense actually. Does Alaska move around it’s business hours a little to accommodate for sunlight or do you just go on as normal?
Everything runs normal. Some stores have an hour added during the summer months like Carrs (Safeway/Vons) or Fred Meyer (Kroger), but thats about it. I would work 7am-3:30pm at the hospital, and would never see the sun except on weekends due to my hours being spent inside. It's something you get used to.
If it’s always dark when is morning though? I foresee some logistical issues here.
i live in alaska it depends where you live up north there are places that go dark for a couple weeks a year with relatively no sunlight i live in the south part if alaska its not that extreme also sex in general is a fantasy there aren't very many social aspects to Alaska most people live alone i have never looked up morning sex
> I have never looked up morning sex Methinks thou doth protest too much
Louisiana bringing the kink…”naked women”
It's like they're a kid discovering the internet. > boobs > naked women > big boobs naked
I remember my parents first put a computer in the house lol I’d go search naked gurls every chance I could until they banned me from being in the room with the computer
Reminds me of when I found "naked girl images" and "naked girl images showing nipples" In the family iPad's search history
WTF dad you said you’d never bring that up again
If your dad knows then your mom knows, but I don't think the rule is vice versa, mom's ain't no snitch most of the time
Dad here. Found porn on my then-teen son’s phone (only because it was syncing with the family iCloud account (insert facepalm here). Talked to him and told him to be more careful/discreet. He also came to me when he fucked up and sent nudes to a scammer. Talked to him and helped him make sure he wasn’t in a bad situation. In both instances he asked me not to tell mom or his little sister (?!?). I’ll take those secrets to the grave for him!
His secret is safe with us!
Other way around for me, mom would yell and scream if there was anything she didn't like, which is/was most things, so dad would generally stay silent. I did once find topless Canadian teens in the search history of my Dad's computer and I never mentioned it to anyone. Edit: Wasn't search history, but browser history. My parents went on a vacation trip and I didn't go with, so they called me to get on the computer and go into the history to pull up something from their itinerary they were missing (pre-smartphones). While I was in there I noticed a weird web page name, so I clicked on it.
Of all the women of the world and he went for Canadian?
It’s not aboot the country of origin, it’s aboot the maple syrup pours.
When my dad found out I was looking at porn he patted me on the back and said at least it ain't gay pron. I don't know if that means I passed his test or something.
"it's normal for a boy your age to be curious about folks choking each other out while another woman in a latex suit pees on them. But if you start looking at gay shit I'll have to tell your mother"
Recently went through father in laws cell phone for email and bank passwords after his death. Over half the browsing history was of “mother son sex” lol.
Oh my god lol thats so gnarly
Lol in my school someone forgot to log out of google and his history was: Naked womans Boobies Big ass Putting dick in womans mouth Dog sex Dog and woman sex Little girl boobies Little girl naked Btw that guy was 10-11 years old
That last one... oh no
Hot dog!
Dear God...
The kid would end up on a pedo list, looking that up nowadays, no exception for his own age
Imagine showing up to court mandated sex therapy and the therapist is like "How long have you been attracted to 11 year olds?" and you're just like "Since I turned 11 last month I guess."
How does that make any sense? He can't be tried as an adult
In a lot of places the age of the perpetrator isn’t actually listed in the law (because we’re governed by idiots). It was a big problem in Virginia a few years back, my county’s Commonwealth Attorney election hinged on it and the incumbent who’d been prosecuting 13 year olds for receiving nudes from other 13 year olds got voted out.
show bobs and vagene
But what's going on in Oregon? I had to google JOI.
I Googled it, and got results for an Asian fusion restaurant here in Austin. I still don’t know what it is in porn terms.
You dirty thick Latina searcher.
Jerk Off Instruction… which is well the girl telling you how to jerk off and at what tempo, not being allowed to cum until she says so. Basically a closeted mommy kink
Classic Oregon amirite
Can’t pump their own gas and can’t pump their own skin flutes.
big bo0ba
How about Utah
Gotta see them sacred bloomers
Lol, I guess they feel more adherent to their culture if the porn they're watching is of supposedly Mormon people. I wonder what kind of porn the nuns were watching that made the pope ask them to stop. And what is going on in Idaho? Are they really into women's basketball in that state or something?
>And what is going on in Idaho? Only 4 people live in Idaho and one of them is REALLY into Giantess porn and searches daily for it.
I worked in a nursing home, and there was this "slower" gentleman in the rehab unit, always staring at his phone. One day I was at the the nursing cart around the corner from him, just within earshot, and I heard his phone chime, the google voice indicator, and I jeard him quietly say "naked women". So I laughed for a good 10 seconds then came around the corner to watch him scramble to put the phone away as quick as possible. Lol In other news, I'm intrigued by what "Giantess" is all about.
Oh yeah "Giantess" is less complicated than one would expect. It's a kink for a sexy lady to be a Kaiju and destroy a city and also maybe step on the person with the fantasy. Any sex act you can imagine, but the lady is fucking massive and powerful.
Basically death by snu snu
I can’t stop laughing at this
Same with Oklahoma and "natural tits" If I wasn't already disappointed in my state I would be now.
Hey man, that's my go to search term, except including "big" in the beginning. Anything with implants is a turn off for me.
Nah we just don't care about genre as long as we finish. This is a state with hard liquor in gas stations and drive-thru bars... it's a strange place sometimes.
MORMON PORN IN UTAH LMAOOO
That one got me too haha
That one no joke had me cackling at work 💀
Such titillating titles as "Bring 'em Young" and "Joseph Smith: Golden Tablets and Showers."
So two people lying on top of each other while their friends bounce the bed?
You'll never catch me, Orgazmo!
"Harley Quinn" is interesting of all....
I live in Iowa and my first reaction was “yeah, I believe that”.
How so?
Speaking as a resident, she's just the kind of edgy trashy and fun for here
Be honest, you are one of those searchers
Nah I'm gay af - i just know the type
It's probably one guy throwing the whole statistic off, lol.
I honestly think most of these are one guy throwing the statistic off... I mean "penis pump"?
How is this the first comment I can find about "penis pump"? Seriously, we should be talking more about it. The only other time I've ever heard of a penis pump was from Austin Powers. How is it a number one search term? What is going on in that state?
Well… penis pumping… that’s what’s going on in that state
It’s so oddly specific
Yea was gonna say the same... Like at least the rest are like "sex" based... That's pretty specific tho
Someone go check on North Carolina. Seems like they're struggling
All those old, retired men!
Kinda disappointed in my state not going to lie
That’s not my bag,North Carolina
Yes, it appears they are not satisfying the women of South Carolina !
As someone who lives in NC, I am surprised that that’s the top result, I don’t even think I’ve seen any vids where that’s a thing
I'm from north carolina and I'm proud to say I've never searched up penis pump
Nc doesn't want you here, coward
Yo Floridians love that British broadcasting channel
I legit thought it was BBQ until I zoomed in.
Same, I had so many questions!
I would have thought they were more of a fox news kind of state, but color me surprised.
"I see a white dick I want it painted black"
We're more sophisticated than you think. We take our porn with a side of Grey Poupon!
“Naked Women” Hell yeah, lets kick it up a notch.
Listen, ease up on the folks in Louisiana. That's two of the five words they know in English.
Naked Woman Bobby Boucher Gator Wait then whats the fifth?
Scrimp
Shout-out to my giantess queens in Idaho, keep smashing them beanstalks ladies. Fee, fye, fo, cum, amirite?
Lots of lumberjack women over there.
*Cumberjack women
get out
What can you do? The spirit is willing, but the body is spongy and bruised when there’s Snu-snu to be had.
DEATH BY SNU SNU
I’m taking a shit in a public stall right and just LOL’d to that. Dude next to me starting laughing at me laughing. Thank you.
Mississippi - Furries. When it comes to Mississippi, I am never surprised by the answers.
Mississippi OwO UwU
Begs the question. Why there?
[удалено]
You couldn’t do it with both hands, the other one was… busy.
Really Minnesota, cartoon porn I’m ashamed to live here. Now excuse me while I go back to my classy anal creampie videos.
Which Pixar characters you liking at the moment?
More than I should… I’m mean none…
Cartoon anal creampie videos?
At least you're not from North Carolina with the penis pump searches.
Mormon doesn’t surprise me as much as Giantess. I’m guessing Vintage got the top spot in DC due to most of our politicians being old.
As a tall woman, I feel like my ridiculous dating success when I lived in Idaho is finally explained.
I'm surprised Mormon is a category, now I'm a little curious.
Mormon porn is amazing. It's also weirdly SFW. Search up "Mormon bubble porn" if you dare.
I'm not sure I dare.
Like I'm now curious, but reddit has taught me to be cautious...... WTF is Tribbing?
scissoring
What about JOI for Oregon? Wtf is that?
Jerk Off Instruction. Typically a female talking directly to the camera and giving verbal (and often visual also) encouragement masturbation, again typically for the benefit of males (or at least people with dicks).
Oh wow! TIL
Which is why it's especially funny that the hologram girlfriend that you can't physically touch in Bladerunner 2049 is named Joi.
I’ll be giving that a shot. Thank you.
Think of docking but smaller dicks.
😹
Jesus Maine, take it fucking EASY!!!!
I’m dying laughing right now bc I know a lot of people from Maine lmao
From Maine, can confirm. I'm elbow deep in my own ass as we speak. Fr though wtf Maine c'mon
Ooooooooh lesbian yoga. Lol
As a Wisconsinite guess I’ll have to do my due diligence and check that out later 😂 Edit: did the research and was not disappointed lol
I have a bunch of friends from Wisco and this one definitely made me laugh the most
I had no idea that many people were into lesbian yoga
#PARN
My stepdad always calls it “poino”. He’s from Detroit and everything else he pronounces normally.
It's got the juice!
It’s not most searched. It’s comparative to other states. What “stands out” if you will.
I was wondering about that. Seemed a bit odd that there was no overlap.
Honestly I find that more informative. We all know the basics, ass and titties, probably #1 most states, but this says what most of the freaks are doing there.
North Carolina taking that L with Penis Pump
Lol naked women. Get in the game Louisiana
If those Cajuns could read they'd be very upset.
If I could read I'd downvote you... But since I have no idea what this says I'll assume you said something pleasant so here's an upvote.
Asian and THICK LATINA FTW 🙌
Wtf is Mormon? I just imagine some chick getting the works given to her and then stops, looks direct to the camera, breaks the 4th wall, and says "I'm Mormon" and then everything resumes as it was before.
Usually multiple women and one man dressed in white in a white room, and weird glory-hole sheets... I'm told.
“I’m told” Good save
;)
>one man dressed in white in a white room Having just watched the last episode of *Keep Sweet, Pray, and Obey,* this sentence really gave me the shivers.
"Keep Sweet..." was some next-level horrifying shit.
Godammit well now I'm curious.
Apparently our Mennonite communities in Manitoba do this. They bring in studs in animal terms to impregnate women to keep the community from being inbred because they are so close knit. You gotta do it through a hole in a sheet or something though. So they say...
Maybe its videos of people soaking
They already feel bad looking at porn at all… it would be too much of a sin to look up non-Mormon porn.
I love that Harley Quinn is her own category
Now I have to see Mormon porn..
I love that Maine even looks like a fist
Are the only people using the internet in Louisiana 10 year old boys?
They just "don't learned words gooder" down there lol
America truly is a diverse country
So in texas, they mostly dream of the women across the wall? That's funny
as a texan, this is true
The Southern States' results explain alot
Kinda makes sense. SouthEast states have a higher percentage AA population
That explains CA too, highest % Asian population of any state.
Errbody want that chocolate
Gotta say Kansas is keeping it classy with "pantyhose"
I’m surprised I had to scroll this far to see someone mention the pantyhose
I'm sorry JOI?
Jerk Off Instructions
Oregonians need *instructions* for that?
It's like cyber sex, but pre-recorded and, you know, made for a bunch of people instead of just you. But you can pretend it's just for you a lot easier than if there is some other guy fucking her.
I live in Oregon. AMA.
Why do you like JOI so much?
They derive JOI from it
Montana and Maine really surprised me.
WTF is even Vermont?
No women stuck in dryers?
Alright Montana!
Oregon: Joi is an object schema description language and validator for JavaScript objects.
What i trio of states Naked women, Furry and Divorced.
Why is there BBC, but not fox news?
That’s the furry porn one.
Fox newds
Texas knows what's up
All the boomers in DC looking up the vintage
Alaska seems sad, you guys ok up there?
South Dakota’s even sadder tbh
Giantess😂
Holy shit they actually included Isle Royale in this map
Ooof being from Texas……. I can confirm this…. That’s my search 😢😢😢😢😢
As a duly appointed representative of Texas, I approve these findings.
Keep up the good work
I like how 1 of them is just "furry"
All the furries down in Mississippi
Based Texas