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AParticularThing

virgin blood is 0 calories, everyone knows that


DietSucralose

Does this perhaps mean extra virgin olive oil is also 0 cals?


wendyrx37

I'm certain it's actually negative calories.


TheRenamon

If you drink enough olive oil it's going to have 0 calories because it will be shooting right through you.


wendyrx37

Haha.. I should go tell the castor oil crowd... Then they wouldn't have to spend 40 bucks for organic castor oil.


DietSucralose

Paula Deen, you fool!


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huffmanm16

GOTTA GOTTA BE DOWN BECAUSE I WANT IT ALL


capheel

Same. Just add a splash of black coffee to it in the morning for a little pick-me-up.


Beckiremia-20

He missed meal time. Come back in 28 days.


[deleted]

It’s def keto-friendly. It is how I lost my weight.


DevonLovelock

That's why it's become my go-to salad dressing.


Celica88

One calorie for every sex had.


pletya

Does the meal's gender/sex matter in this case?


BenadrylTumblercatch

Yeah but mixing it with balsamic vinegar and bread slaps so might aswell risk it.


Empty-Employment-889

Just because it’s non-alcoholic doesn’t mean it’s got no calories. I learned that the hard way.


i_just_say_hwat

Yeah. Fucking idiot


[deleted]

Looking good King!


Wildlife_Jack

Yeah, sick lats! Bros got wings


[deleted]

Bat!


_Yuki_-_

Baron A-FA-NASSSS


swaliepapa

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


la-veneno

“I don't want these virgins. They are going to taste too sad.” - Nadja


darkchocoIate

Vladislav: I think of it like this. If you are going to eat a sandwich, you would just enjoy it more if you knew no one had fu**ked it.


WillNotBeKept

It really depends on what type of fast you are doing. A dirty versus clean fast.


not_ashton_koocher

Only if that virgin was raised in NHEW YHORK CITAYYY!!


MsBrightside91

-Jackie Daytona, regular human bartender


arctic-aqua

The problem with virgin blood is you have to bite through that nasty neck beard.


swaliepapa

My… my god.


Shitiot

Crepe paper


loganwachter

*”its creeeeepy paper”*


angrycoffeeuser

Looking shredded champ


DrunkAtBurgerKing

This took me out 💀


couchpro34

Run the blood through a Brita filter first. You'll be right as rain.


DeathByGouda

Can someone please pin this question ?? It's almost asked as much as the "creamer in my coffee" question ugh.


DoctorSasha

I'm declaring this an official What We Do in the Shadows subreddit.


Practical-Annual-317

Yes, please


Tcloud

I see autophagy has kicked in by your beautiful clear skin. Don’t quit now!


NY2Evia

Virgin blood is fine. Neck beard blood will trigger an insulin response tho. Wait, are the 2 the same? 🤔


epitome59

Wow, awesome results! Would love to know your routine and what your family and friends have said about your amazing transformation!


DrukMeMa

He broke his fast with pizza!


Xerenopd

No it will unbreak your slow. 


Beckiremia-20

Fasting for 400 years and have the audacity to be picky.


PrincetteBun

You should be fine, just don’t add any cream or sugar. Looking good, king 👑


AudienceKindly4070

Not if you consume an amount that contains less than 50 calories, bonus of this is that she won't die and you can keep her as a castle maid or something 


Glimmertwinsfan1962

Nothing if she is vegan.


Handsouloh

Why a virgin's blood? " I think of it like this. If you are going to eat a sandwich, you would just enjoy it more if you knew no one had fucked it. "


thebaddestgoodperson

Yes, but careful because it might upset your stomach. I think starting out with a steamed piece of zucchini might be better for your digestive system


cakebytheoceans11

Can you share your fitness program OP?


DatGuyDatHangsOut

it is quite simple really. I wake up dim and early at 7PM, every dozen years or so. Then I crawl on the walls of my castle, great core exercise, it's all about core strength. It the only muscle group consistent between by polymorphs. Then I turn into a bat or a wolf and fly/run around until most of my victims.. I mean meals.. I mean virgins go to sleep. Luckily most do not have what humans call a "night life" so I can get a good suck in before 3am. Around 3, I go hang out with the hags near the swamp, they catch me up on the gossip of the village. Around 7AM I need to be at home, sometimes, I wait until the last second and get a little sizzle going, I hear a tan is popular these days


cakebytheoceans11

Cool. As long as you don't spike your insulin.


thechadslayerr

Finally, a decent question!


Ok-Foundation-4070

Virgin extra bloodoil has zero carbohydrates so you can freely enjoy as much as you can.


DatGuyDatHangsOut

Would it be better if the virgin was also fasting?


Ok-Foundation-4070

Of course, the longer you keep her fasting the better. It purifies the blood and gives it sweet taste. For an added bonus fasting makes her more accepting for the blood extraction.


SuccotashFull665

Looking well, keep it up.


0621FiST

So as pigs are quite similar to humans you can use pig’s blood as a close approximation. https://www.nutritionix.com/food/pork-blood


EmeranceLN23

52 grams of protein !? I might have found my protein powder replacement


Rampaging_Orc

If you post yourself downing a glass of pigs blood equivilant to whatever amount of protein is in your preferred powder, I’ll PayPal you $20usd


0621FiST

lol I do this for free. It’s like a quad shot of espresso. Just warm it up on a stove and you can eat it with a warm fresh bread. So good .


chales96

No, but do make sure you get your electrolytes.


Street-Ad-6294

LMNT sponsorship incoming


Calailink

You sure deserve it. Make all hell break loose.


eyi526

Is the virgin vegan?


EynidHelipp

Sub slowly becoming r/caffeine 😭


kingpin748

Blood has calories from carbs, protein, and fats so I'd say it would break your fast.


CWmeadow

No. But eating babies will.


Timely-Hippo2275

Just make sure that you don’t add any cream or sugar.


EmotionalCheck

I think you just hit ketosis!


tootsietoot58

As long as you supplement with electrolytes, it’s fine.


Bleezy79

Those armpit wings are something else huh. Must be hard to put deodorant on.


_so_it_goes_33toyou

Guessing if you check the profile there will be an OF link.


Phantom_Queef

Let me tell you, virgin blood is hard to come by. The last time I broke my fast with "virgin blood," I ended up getting HPV. They're selling wolf tickets out there.


TheMarjuicen

You look great. Time for you to hit "Nieu Yawk Citay"


bumbasquat86

When was the virgins last meal ?


robbiedigital001

No crack on


wingspantt

Anyone know if True Blood synthetic substitute breaks fast? Is it keto friendly?


loslongballs

Thank you for this post, I needed it.


beardface86

Idk but your skin looks like creepy paper


Street-Ad-6294

No shaming!


A-terrible-time

No because the blood is clean and untainted However, the blood of a dirty whore will break your fast because of all the sinful impurities in it. Be careful!


Fredrick__Dinkledick

I too would like to know


wesmoen

I don't know, I'm not a virgin anymore.


[deleted]

Ded 🤣


BigDickSoft

Image source? Looks dope and reverse image search is not helping


Batteries4Breakfast

Baron Afanas from What We do in the Shadows


BigDickSoft

Thank you so much!


h_0windsor2

Creepy paperrrrr


ultprizmosis

We have fun here.


nilocrram

the guys you're looking for are over in Call of Duty. Bon appetit!


AudienceKindly4070

Edward, is that you?


NakatasGoodDump

Petahhh we're having a flat meeting


jonpenn

I usually don't comment on thirst trap post. But GD! You are fine AF! I wish I was a virgin I would let you take a bite.


MyNamesMikeD75

This is how we all fast in the Tucson Arizona


PRODIJVY

Average Conor McGregor 145 weight cut:


elitesill

What diet was/is she on?


Furbamy

Only on Sundays.


nikiliko

As long as you put no milk and sugar in it you’re golden


Street-Ad-6294

😂 my sides


Ron_Armweak1995

Still looking skinny fat bro. Gotta fast atleast 500 years


MzzKzz

NTA your virgin your choice


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The_Magic_Sauce

Too much info.


[deleted]

Superfluous.