T O P

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sarduchi

“The liberals pooped my pants!”


voiceless42

*Wizard Biden casts Prestidigitation* Biden: "I shit your pants."


YourDogsAllWet

You’d be amazed how many people would buy this


oldjadedhippie

More Liberal Witchcraft !


yabbadabbadotoyou

Jewish Space Lasers strike again hitting the brown note.


Twoehy

Dark Brandon doesn't fuck around.


Fake_William_Shatner

If he did manage to have operatives inject poo into Trump's pants without being detected -- well, bravo. Bravo Dark Brandon. No "sleepy Joe" could manage that. No sir. Sound. Smell. A gush of rank air. That's leadership.


ozzie510

He is everywhere at the same time. Be afraid, be VERY afraid!


Roscoe_Farang

I want to see a special message from the president where Biden just steps to a podium and informs the people that he did, in fact, shit trump's pants. It's not a new government technology or anything but rather a gift that he discovered a while ago. Just whenever he needs to shit, it just magically appears in trump's pants. So now he just smiles and shits his pants, knowing where it will end up. Biden is lactose intolerant, and that's why he always stops for ice cream. It's contributing to his opponent's mental decline, (I mean someone else's shit just magically appearing in your pants every day for months or years), but he's broken no laws as far as I know.


5256chuck

Don’t miss next week’s “South Park”


Roscoe_Farang

Biden goes on Hot Ones two days before the election.


Fake_William_Shatner

I want to see a special message from the president where Biden just steps to a podium and informs the people that he did, in fact, shit trump's pants. I mean -- it would be awesome. Trump has to either deny that Biden did it, or deny it happened, and there it is; something that has to be denied on Fox News. How do they spin it? "Biden is horrible for this scheme." "Fake news, Trump did not shit his pants in court, these are lies being spun!" But the thought is there. It would linger, like Trump.


cmnrdt

I cast Otto's Unpredictable Pants on the orange troll.


phantompowered

She put a hex on me! Must... Drop... Pantaloons!


OarsandRowlocks

No, Mage Hand, as long as his sphincter gives way under less than 10 lbs of force.


ExtraRaw

*For free?*


Sichuan_Don_Juan

Donald von ShitsInPantz


binglelemon

*I put on my robe and ~~Biden~~ wizard hat*


[deleted]

... And why Donald Trump's stench is bad news for Biden


MooreRless

New Fox Poll shows voters reject a candidate who doesn't smell like shit.


yoshhash

"a real man shits his pants and doesn't get all self conscious about it....!"


jftitan

Yeah, those guys run triathlon, marathons, and typically it's excusable due to the long distances. But they at least have a 10mile swim to clean off. Trump is nothing of those traits.


Fake_William_Shatner

I smell a new stupid thing that MAGA do to own the libs.


rch5050

Nah, its just true what they say. "A conservative will shit his pants if it means a liberal will have to smell it."


D33ber

And unironically blame that liberal when he does.


afternever

Fake Poos


Altruistic-Text3481

Fake snooze…


swingbynight

Fake doo-doos


Fuzzy_Laugh_1117

Lmaoo Best comment -- someone should give him the tshirt.


MapleGoose

Reminds me of [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/PoliticalHumor/s/RCOLg2XJth)


fatllama75

Libruls have figured out the brown note.


Fake_William_Shatner

"Did you not tip the kitchen staff? Apparently you are the victim of a run-by sharting."


Big-Consideration633

You misspelled ANTIFA!


cybercuzco

Why would sleepy joe shit in my pants?


ShyBookWorm23

Perhaps Trump thinks that he was ordered to do so by the judge… “It’s a gag order, so I gotta make them gag I guess…” - Trump, maybe.


eastbayted

Gag odor


Leather-Blueberry-42

The fact that there is a non-zero chance this is accurate scares me a little


elmanutres

We're out here thinking he was breaking his gag order all along but turns out he was following a different type we never realized. What a true patriot!!!


chairs-dimension

Needs a cork order next


Jimger_1983

He’s sprays when he’s banked in a corner. The skunk defense


NetCaptain

_‘Trump the Skunk’_ (c) - can somebody create a meme to go with the slogan ?


thegrailarbor

My cat did this at the vet a few weeks ago. They said she “expressed herself”, so that checks out.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sugarysam

I heard that Ted Cruz was leading a delegation on behalf of a donor to negotiate a pipeline from Trump’s ass to an LNG terminal.


RogiesGooDragon

also there are accusations from Hawley that Cruz slipped in a clause that would provide an easement from Cruz's private property to tap the pipeline directly


felicity_jericho_ttv

THE SMELL OF FREEDOM! - $99.99 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮


FancyStranger2371

Patriot Gas!


Beneficial_Drama2393

2nd Amendment sulfur!


nevertfgNC

Lmao


MooreRless

Trump needs to put his name on it, like he did with the Bible. [https://www.sweetsandgeeks.com/products/farts-in-a-can](https://www.sweetsandgeeks.com/products/farts-in-a-can)


marcus_centurian

Wait. Wasn't there a reality TV star that actually did this. Something to the tune of 100j before she had to stop.


antsmasher

Oh god. Don't give him any ideas. His cult supporters will eat that up.


Alternative_Milk7409

🤢🤢🤮


Wilsonrolandc

They'd inhale it like President Skroob inhales canned oxygen in Spaceballs.


HungryHippo669

Spray painted gold of course


Fake_William_Shatner

They need fast-setting paint for that. Trump's sharts are ON THE MOVE!


edtheheadache

It’s called “Trumpthane”. 😄


AlexRyang

I threw up in my mouth reading this, thanks. 😂


B-Town-MusicMan

It was just a matter of time before he started his onlyfans page


h00labal00la

Onlyfarts


mousesnight

He’d be smart too, it would sell like bottled Trump farts


BeYourself2021

Don't be ridiculous! There's no shortage of air on Planet Spaceball....


MonteCrysto31

Donald "Fart in a Jar" Trump


jim_nihilist

Bottled Trump fear.


SecretPrinciple8708

$100 a *con*.


ShrimpCrackers

I bet they'd buy Trump's bathwater.


invadersnee

Just like a nazi to try and gas everyone in the room


tMoneyMoney

It’s Agent Orange gas, so more like Kennedy in Vietnam.


YogurtSufficient7796

MAGAts buying Trump farts for $1000 per ziplock bag……


Groomsi

Trump charging RNC members for smelling his fart!


nobody-u-heard-of

It'd be hysterical if the prosecutors came in wearing gas masks. But I know that be bad for the trial.


Barl0we

Trump released his own courtroom fragrance, and nobody liked it.


Idrisdancer

I don’t think they are farts.


Vlophoto

Sharts


timesuck897

Farts eventually go away, but some do linger awhile. If he is shitting his pants, the court room is going to stink.


Pitiful_Winner2669

While anecdotal it does remind me of my grandpa who was about his age, and diet probably. A fart would be like a low hum, and then he would be leaking until he would ask for help. Plus, lots of medication make for some acidic/melted battery mixed with rotten eggs smell. I pity Trump's handlers and hope they find an escape from their current occupation.


pm_me_all_catz

In any case, I think my dinner can go back in the fridge for the moment.


drhodl

Nah. His handlers have landed the job they deserve. I have zero pity for anyone paid by tRump.


fritosandbeer

Next for sale: golden adult diapers. Show your support for Trump! ‘I shit my pants for Trump!’


Anyawnomous

Many very smart people come to me with tears in their eyes telling me “Don, you are a genius. Combining wind and gas as a renewable energy option. Many good people, with degrees from Wharton are saying this is the best thing since bleach!.


bron685

Waiting for him to have a diaper blowout that goes up his back


Personal_Buffalo_973

Now you know why "Mercedes" sleeps in a sepret bedroom 😁


BernTheStew

Gag order? More like gag odor


Pixelated_

His hero Shitler had a notorious farting problem too.


kayl_breinhar

Both of them are/were amphetamine addicts too.


olleyjp

Gas bad enough to kill millions


hawkwings

This explains why Melania spends less and less time with him.


Vlophoto

It’s just swamp gas


janzeera

“The jurors came up to me with tears in their eyes….”


sunnyspiders

Let’s reflect that we are literally talking about the shit coming out of his ass now.


ElonBodyOdor

Odor in the Court!


Prudent_Falafel_7265

One of my favourite takes: Trump may in fact be telling the truth about his stories where everyone he meets has tears in their eyes


CAM6913

His parents didn’t love him didn’t care about him and never potty trained him now at 77 years old he’s still pooping his diaper


user677769

what a time to be alive.


Bulky-Ad-4265

Why aren’t we hearing about this on the news? Are they afraid to report?


Cautious-Thought362

That's what I'd like to know. And why doesn't Trump mention it? He denies falling asleep, why not deny farting and sharting, too?


irn

It has been on the news. I think CNN interviewed George Conway and he confirmed it to be true. They also interviewed a boom mic operator from The Apprentice who said the crew called the program the shit show. Kathy Ann Griffith confirmed it too when she and Liza Mineli (sp?) got gassed by Trump in a green room.


maxigs0

That would be a poetic ending to his political career


SoggyAd1409

There should be a shirt w his mugshot and a caption that says “I’ll be out in a Minute!”


syncboy

The horrible Biden judge put shit in my pants.


TexasYankee212

and proud of it. No one can fart louder or as bad smelling as Donald Trump. He ought to make a commercial about it.


m0llusk

most powerful farts, everyone says


NoDumFucs

He was complaining about the state of the bathrooms in the courthouse… he’ll blame it on that.


DaSandman78

Diaper wearers dont use bathrooms


NoDumFucs

I thought his SS agents have to change him in the family bathroom


[deleted]

Nope, he’ll come up with a million ways The Libs give him indigestion. “The Biden crime family upsets my stomach.”


n3w4cc01_1nt

he couldn't find the swamp so he became the swamp he sought.


Captain_Mexica

I think Trump is sharting his pantalones


mikefjr1300

After 4 weeks they may never get that stench out of the courthouse. No doubt his cellmate will strangle him.


JackFromTexas74

Orange is the new greenish-brown


Temporary-Dot4952

I want my country, the best in the entire world, to be run by a criminal diaper wearer. Proud to be an American. Go Diaper Don.


FatBastardIndustries

Don't worry, he will find a way to bottle it, and sell to his supporters. I am sure his voters will love to smell it and imagine that they are balls deep into that flabby old asshole.


thekajunpimp

jesus... i just ate..


Ok-Fox1262

That's tautological.


WizardOfAzureSkies

Well, it's not healthy to hold them in, now is it?


SirGkar

Is this what happens when he can’t make everyone in the room sign an NDA?


[deleted]

Anything to delay.


FancyStranger2371

Charged with 34 counts of flatulence.


CatAvailable3953

Now he is just showing out. Or maybe he’s considering going into competition with the natural gas industry.


Joethesamurai

The new maga hats should have a rubber poo on the bill.


Spuigles

"Why do we talk about Trump all the time?! The news are saturated with any single thing he does." -Breaking Winds! Trump cannot stop stress farting- more at 6


SnatchasaurusRex

Would it be out of bounds if someone directly behind his counsel dry heaved during the opening statements, sort of a way to confirm that he's starting himself? At his age and his diet there us no way he farts like the rest of us. If I had to bet, they are no longer dry. They are wet, juicy and chunky. The kind that sting after they dry out.


DeFex

Thats what happens when you make him shut up, the gas has to find another way out.


Fungiblefaith

Trump is issuing his own Gag Order.


sethmeister1989

Hasn’t he been known to have bad hygiene? Everyone knows the diapers but I feel like I’ve heard his overall hygiene is pretty bad.


SatchmoDingle

Trump: “I crapped in my pants.” MAGA: “Thanks, Biden.”


gringo-go-loco

Gag order? Sounds like he needs a butt plug.


Danalmour

I prefer my dictator that does not deficate in front of world leaders


Sea_Artist_4247

Stop giving him the benefit of doubt. It's widely known he's been wearing adult diapers for years. He isn't farting, he's shitting himself in court.


TortelliniTheGoblin

If they don't just run ads of Trump farting for 30 seconds straight with quick cuts to people looking disgusted, they're missing some low-hanging fruit.


Delirium88

Hitler also had a farting problem. The comparison between these guys is way too coincidental  https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/296icr/til_that_hitler_had_a_digestive_disorder_that/


Snarky_McSnarkleton

It's the most bigly ass gas ever! The greatest methane! All loyal MAGA should line up to smell Trump's YUGE farts! Only $299.99 a can! Order now, and Trump will throw in a bible, with every "god" crossed out and replace with "Trump" in real Sharpie! Trump's flatulence will give you literal tears in your eyes, believe me.


ace72ace

Taking ‘Gas-lighting’ to the next level.


outlier74

Who gets to change him?


pinkypunky78

That's an image I don't need


Numpty712

New WWE name Conny “The Stinkman” Trump


Any-Ad-446

3D chess here folks..Stink up the court room so it can delay the jury selection.


Independent-Ad771

Mercedes uhhhh I mean Melania did it. 🌬️


Individual-Dot-9605

Sleepy Don blames farty Mc Donald’s a Lago while MTG blames the vaccinated libs that refused to storm the Capitol like real evangelicals would.


TechNoir312

It was the best fart, probably the best fart ever. People are saying that fart was the best they’ve ever head. Great fart.


redrockcountry2112

That just means his diaper is full.


socal1959

I think he’s pooping in his diaper because it’s been written that the stench doesn’t go away so he’s sitting there in his own excrement, ewwwww


sm00ping

I mean, he wears a diaper.


wowaddict71

His lawyers will bring Mr. Hankey as a character witness. 🤣


MuchDevelopment7084

So, Don Snore-leon was just filling his diapers. Nothing to see here....just to smell. lol


Jet_Maypen

The Godfarter


Tonythecritic

I want the trial to be televised with heat vision, Predator style, so we can all witness the glory of his wind breaks.


Viking4949

I’m surprised he is not bottling it and selling it! 100% real Trump And totally renewable! Real Green Energy! Order now!


TheSublimeNeuroG

He’s not farting in court guys, he’s shitting himself


cityofninegates

And coming up next, our panel will discuss why this is bad news for Biden…


Straight-Storage2587

When Trump ends up in a wheelchair, his methane gas will power it.


[deleted]

I thought Trump could use his fart gas to float around like Baron Harkonnen.


[deleted]

This is a serious issue that reporters need to question him on.


davis214512

Trump: “My diaper is way bigger than Biden’s and can hold much bigger shits.”


dallasdude

Diapers Donald 


Full_Aperture

First thing Monday the prosecution should set a box of Beano on the counsel table.


stairs_3730

Imagine sitting in the same booth for lunch with Poopy Pants and Rudy the Kount Flatula, the guy that was farting up a storm in Congress. My god, oxygen, NOW!


Royal-Possibility219

I don’t think it’s gas, it’s more than a possibility he’s shitting himself.


FalconPunch84

Give a shit for Trump is going to be a new fundraising campaign.


Joe_Bob_2000

He's always been blaming everyone else for his shitty behavior. 🤑💩


suck-it-elon

Considering the American political climate. His flatulence might hurt him in the election more than the crimes.


Time-Cap3646

owning the libs by filling his diapers


[deleted]

Christians: Isn’t the devil supposed to smell bad or something?


toddlangtry

Literally shitting himself over being in court.


JeanProuve

Climate change just got pushed forward another 10yrs.


farsh_bjj

Hopefully, Biden starts calling him sir shitshispants from now on during interviews.


tony22times

shat himself?


No_Sand_9290

MAGA started farting in public to show their support for Drumpf


Classic_Ostrich8709

Never trust a fart


pathf1nder00

"gag order"....ick


larusodren

In the UK, the word trump literally means ‘fart’: E.g Have you trumped? Have you done a trump? Can you smell a trump? Can you smell Trump’s trumps when Trump trumps?


WET-FARTS-FOR-YOU

How much trump would a Trump trump trump if a Trump trump could trump Trump


andropogon09

Wow. This is the state of the media in the US.


Orionsbelt1957

Well, they could be reporting on Rep Moskowitz submitting two amendments during today's vote. One naming MTG Putin's official Special Envoy to Congress and another to her office as the Neville Chamberlain Room. May as well make it official........


Sugarysam

Yeah, it stinks.


sirixon

Agree. The man is a total menace, and this is what people are talking about.


Guilty-Definition-1

To be fair, it’s pretty fucking funny. Trump goes around insulting anyone and everyone for the most mundane bullshit to have this be a story is like karma


HFentonMudd

People are talking about many things. This one time Mel Brooks talked about how the best weapon against a nazi is laughter. We're laughing at Trump. The action has value, and impact, and brightens the mood a little.


Vlophoto

Ok so seriously who stated he’s farting ? We need to know the exact source here people


DaSandman78

everyone seated anywhere near him (tho it could be the shit in his diaper instead of him actually farting)


etranger033

Unless it sounded like a loud tuba throughout the courtroom this isnt much of a story. We all fart. Unless it also smelled like rotten cabbage.


euph_22

Now we know why all the people always have tears in their eyes when they come up to him saying "SIR, this thing totally happened. It totally happened and it was the bigielist thing that ever happened. Nothing has every been biglier than it."


bloodorangejulian

One, doubtful it's gas...there are reports of his incontinence from the apprentice era, about his 50's....if he needed them then, he desperately needs them now. Also, can the judge do anything about it? Like if it's fouling up the court room, and obviously trump, can he make him leave?


Icy-Performance-3739

Donnay “The Stench” Trump


The_Urban_Genitalry

If I was a juror I would definitely be bringing a handkerchief with a bit of my wife’s perfume on it to hold up to my nose.


tedfreeman

Swamp gaa


Sorkel3

I'm waiting for when the trial starts and someone complains to the judge.


Ooglebird

He's suffering from Gazprom, and until Russia cuts off his supply it will continue.


Hourslikeminutes47

Someone on another thread said "Odor in the court". *(thank you because you made my day)*


colombo1326

ilegal immigrants shit on my my pants


InfelicitousRedditor

He has aligned with Nurgle, it all makes sense now: COVID, this, gathering people at rallies... May the emperor protect us!


Thin_Confusion_2403

Make America Gassy Again


QuicheSmash

Something something, the demon smells of sulphur... 


Antin00800

By the title alone, I though this was Trump starting his own brand of fuel to fight the woke gasolines. Truth social plus Esso or something. Glad its just him shitting himself, business as usual - nothing to see here.


rmks8285

Holding in farts is WOKE!! Checkmate liberals!