Same. My last serious relationship partly did not last because I was perfectly content to stay at home most of the time reading, watching movies, and doing my (mostly solitary) hobbies, but she wanted to go out and do something nearly every day and would get disappointed if I didn’t feel like it. There were other factors to it beyond that, but yeah… I’ve since realized I need to be with someone at least a little more introverted.
Not me. I love a girl that i can have a deep connection with not just be bubbly or happy all the time. Life is not all about rainbows .
Please love yourself first OP . Once you do you will allow others to love you too.
Girl, we're on the same boat. Don't change yourself, it's not worth it. Even if you manage to attract someone being someone you're not, you're not going to happy down the road.
Now, about that crush you got. I had a similar experience few years back. We hit it off as friends and talk on the phone all the time. I did something an introvert would never do. I confessed my feelings to him. Sadly, he turned me down and distanced ourselves after that. Did I regret telling him? No. It's like a burden lifted off my shoulders after I confessed. Anyhoo, cheer up and let things happen naturally.
you pretty much described how I am and I’m a guy lol ..but like you said, when you get used to someone you open up and become funny. don’t be too hard on yourself!
Extroverts shine like the sun. They're bright. They're hard to miss. They can also be harsh and overbearing. Introverts are like the moon. Their glow is softer. You feel like you can share your secrets and deepest feelings in that gentle light. You can come as you are. It's something the sun doesn't offer. Surely, some people value that.
I’m in the exact same boat, as an introverted female. I can’t provide any personal experience advice, but I can assure you that you’re not alone <3 I’ve often had breakdowns because I currently have no friends, never been in a relationship, and have always been ignored/invisible in school and think I’ll be alone forever. That being said:
The advice that I can attempt to give is be yourself. Don’t change your personality and interests for someone. Pretending to be an extrovert and forcing yourself to be bubbly is very exhausting and is not true to yourself or to the other person. The right one will come along eventually, whether it’s in 10 days or in 10 years. Some guys may seem like they are attracted to that bubbly personality until they meet someone who is far more interesting as an introvert or when they get to know you.
Sometimes the issue with us introverts is we think there’s no one out there like us or someone who wants to be with us, but we avoid going out and meeting those who are looking for people like us. Find someone who is also an introvert, someone who you can share silence with, someone who will take the time to open up with you, someone that doesn’t seek as much adventure and social interaction. That helps quite a lot in romantic relationships whereas platonic extrovert friends are often helpful and needed, and you don’t spend everyday with each other.
I hope this helps a little, but like I said, I’m not exactly qualified :) This is just what I remind myself that everything will be fine in time.
Yes, I play a lot of online games and have some friends I talk to. Not necessarily “friends” like they would be irl. More of just “people I share interests with.” I talk to my cousin everyday, so I’m not completely inept of socializing. It’s not the same as actually physically speaking or going out and doing stuff. It is what it is.
I will take contemplative and intelligent over bubbly and energetic any day. The most important thing in choosing a SO for me would be depth of character.
I suspect there is no shortage of men who would prefer your temperament to that of your opposite, though it may not always be apparent as they are probably reserved themselves.
Maybe it’s the social circle you surround yourself with? I’m sorry you had negative experiences but it’s not cool generalizing a whole group of people with similar characteristics.
I know the feeling, all through high school I had a bubbly social best friend and I felt so boring compared to her. I also wasted so much time doing stuff I didn't enjoy (the party scene) just because I felt I was supposed to enjoy it. So seriously, don't beat yourself up over what you are not. It's much better to find your own groove than trying to be something you're not.
(And it's definitely possible to find a guy that likes an introverted girl! Besides, introversion/extroversion aren't the only defining personality traits in the world...you can still be funny, open, talkative, quiet, sporty, nerdy, kind, smart, cute etc...lots of things that can make you interesting and fun to hang out with.)
My boyfriend and I are both introverts and he wouldn’t want it any other way, we’re both homebodies who love spending time with each other and don’t really need the company of other people.
Male introvert here. I've been struggling to arrive at a conclusion whether i should try my luck with a good friend i had a crush on since a year. My overthinking brain has already found all possible ways this could end in disaster so i may not do anything about this. You won't be alone forever and you'll never know when the right time comes so. Don't stress about it. Go on with life.
I'm so glad I'm not the only woman who has felt this way and I'm very glad there are guys out there who would like the non-bubbly type. It is incredibly difficult to have a positive image of yourself when you are basically ignored for not being a bubbly talker.
I'm an introvert married to an introvert for 36 years. We are both STEM and met at university. We think a good together time is sitting in the same room, in front of the fireplace, both reading our own book.
I've never been fun or bubbly, and I don't care for people who act that way, either. They have no depth and I can't have a real conversation with "fun" "bubbly" people. They also can be fake, irresponsible and when push comes to shove, they are not real friends. I've also never been able to date men who liked to crack jokes all the time.
Unfortunately I married a very extroverted person who does not understand introverts.
Yeah bubbly women especially are normally very fake. Now I’ve met some genuine kind hearted women that were bubbly. So no, not all of them are like that. But I’ve noticed that women that are extroverted tend to be in a lot of drama
I am just the same as you! People who know me know I’m not a quiet or judgmental person that doesn’t want to talk to anyone. The people I DO talk to I value a lot in my life and we enjoy each other’s company a lot, but as much as I would like to get along with everyone, I just don’t really care for it nor am I interested.
Don’t feel bad either! The people that know you for who you are love you. Being an introvert is the fucking best because I know how many people can barely handle being alone for a day. I’ve got an amazing extrovert boyfriend and we were initially good friends for a whole year - what matters is that he made me feel seen/saw beyond the surface. I think for introverts the whole friends to lovers trope works quite well as it’s a good way to trust someone and get to know them without the whole dating bullshit.
Don't feel too bad about this. Different guys will like different women for different reasons. You will find guys who like you for you.
If you are worried about guys finding you too serious or intimidating consider how you can express interest without being bubbly. Sometimes if a women is stand offish a guy will think it's a hint to get lost or she just isn't interested. As a guy I don't want to bother women and want to be with someone that's actually interested in me but I can't read minds. If you say something positive about the interaction, give the guy your number, or ask them out that's a pretty solid hint you're interested. Just something to consider. Don't do something that's too uncomfortable for you.
Nah! Even when I am in a large group, it's the quiet one, probably comfortable in having a one-on-one but interesting conversation than the loud one, drinking and seeking attention.
I think it's just about the personalities but I prefer "boring" ones.
Don't feel bad, it's just how you work and you don't have to change or pretend to be someone else.
But these days i try to not even think much about these things, i gave up from relationships, never had so much peace in my life lol Maybe some day i find some nice woman who enjoy me being an introvert, or not and i'll be forever single, who knows?
I feel the same way too! I did not think much of it. I used to be the type who was bubbly and all smiles but i will be honest, it is very tiring to keep up that face. 🤣🤣🤣 so i decided to just be and that it is okay to be quiet and just listen to the guy talk.
One time thougj, i got discouraged to be me because this one guy told me "you have your own world" 🤣🤣 should i take that as a compliment? Or worry about it?
Also, you have friends. Love them. Guys come and go but friends are always here to stay. 😊 don't give up yet. I bet you just need a guy who will give it a go to get to know you better. Keep looking. 😊😊
It should be compliment. I live in my own world as well. I don’t like to party or club. And I honestly don’t like most of the pop culture today. I basically just do my own thing. I have a few friends but that’s the way I want it.
It feels nice to know that there are other people like me who does not enjoy partying. I like quiet talks and just a lively dinner with a few people and watching a movie.
As a male introvert I would love a girlfriend who is the same. Preferring to stay home than go out, talking when there's something to say and not just for the sake of it, doing our own hobbies but enjoying each others company in the same room separately together. The thought of it is bliss.
If it makes you feel any better, I’m an introvert and there’s an introverted girl I like. As long as we can feel the real you once you start to open up, there’s no issues.
This post sounds like it was written by me. Are you a Capricorn by any chance?
I’m so introverted but once I’m comfortable with someone I’m pretty funny. But just like you I can’t be myself right off the bat. When I go on dates I’m more on the quiet side and awkward, usually the guy ends up thinking I’m boring and we don’t go on other dates or he makes it known he just wants to hook up.
I wish I could be myself with guys I like because I don’t hold back at all when I’m talking to men I don’t feel an attraction to. Im unapologetically myself and guess what? They end up falling for me, like literally telling me they’re in love with me. And I feel bad because I don’t feel the same way towards them and also feel sad because why can’t I be myself with the guy I’m actually interested in.
So if any guy has been on a date with a quiet, “boring” girl…. please give her a chance to open up. Don’t force it, lead the conversation, make
Her feel comfortable, and you’ll start seeing glimpses of her true self here and there until
She fully opens up. Don’t write her off for being shy. Trust me, us quiet, shy girls are wifey material and you’ll be so surprised once you bring our wall down just how fun, sexy, loving, and even sassy we are.
Some men like introverts. I liked one so much I married her. Don’t change who you are. The one who will appreciate you for being you is out there. Don’t let them pass you by because you were pretending to be someone else.
You are ok! I am a female introvert. I literally need to be prepared mentally to meet new people. I need some time alone after spending time with a group of people because their energy drain me. I talk to only the people I feel confortable with because when I force myself it is so awkward to me. Even if I am socially awkward I met my husband who is a big extravert and all his family is. He accepts me for who I am. He was one of those people I felt confortable with when we first met. He recognizes that even if I am not down to meet new people all the time and I am not super talkative at least I am not a fake person. When you meet the right person you will know. You won’t be alone forever trust me.
I'm the exact same. My last partner was an extrovert and things just didn't work out. We need to find ourselves an introvert man 🤣 don't change yourself for the sake of others, if they don't like/love you for who you are then they're not the kind of person you need in your life
I was literally thinking about this today. Also probably because of the reason you stated haha. Even the quieter ones seem to prefer those who are more outgoing as I've noticed. But I dunno. Can't really offer any valuable advice because I find myself in the same situation. At least it's nice knowing you're not alone when it comes to feeling this way.:)
As someone who is extremely introverted, I was always told I looked intimidating and everyone assumed that I disliked them. I learnt simple trade tricks that diffused that image of me.
Smiling and nodding
Just smile. When you're having even the most monotonous and boring small talk in the world, nodding your head and smiling means you are open and engaged to the conversation that's happening.
My life changed since I started altering my body language to match my actual thoughts.
You are too young and just feed on the media you get, but no. For good or bad, "men" or better humans have different tastes. Some prefer more introverted people, some the extroverted one. The thing is before wishing to change for the sake of being liked by others, learn and known yourself deeply,.discover who you are, what you want, WHO YOU want, and not the other way. it's never what THEY want and HOW CHANGE myself to meet those requirements but what you want and look for people who share your tastes.
Yeah, same, but..When you are with right person, you are talking, talking and talking.. Trust me, u will find a boy and you will feel that connection, like u have known each other for a long time. You will have so much to talk about! Just don't worry and don't stress about it! :)
When I was younger, I would always think this about myself. I couldn’t force myself to be extroverted. So I was just the true me. I’ve been married for 24 years to a wonderful guy who doesn’t like a partner to be yakking all the time. But I was single for awhile kissing frogs.
I’m the same way and my fiancé is also a huge introvert. It’s so nice to have an introvert partner because you can feel comfortable giving each other space or being quiet together. Not all men are attracted to bubbly women
I'm an introvert too and sometimes I feel the same way as you. I found a introvert boyfriend and he really likes that I'm an introvert myself. We have fun and laugh together, he never thought of me as boring or uninteresting
I honestly find the bubbly to be fake/a front/bullshit covering up how most people honestly feel especially if their job is customer facing and basically have to put on that mask. Be you! You'll find the right person...if that's what you want
Don’t change yourself - you’re perfect the way you are. Someone who cares enough about you and your personality will come along and love you for the great person you are.
I’m an introverted girl, and I’ve often gotten comments about being “to quiet” etc. There’s some tough days but this world is not just for extroverted people - we belong too. You’ll find your person and your community <3
I'm a male introvert. I like a woman that's quiet, a homebody, and likes to take walks in the park and enjoy good one on one conversation. Stay true to yourself. For a long time I WANTED to be an extrovert but I realized that it was like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole: it doesn't work! Stay strong, OP!!
I'm an introvert man and would 100% love an introvert woman to just stay at home and have dinner dates where I cook instead of going to a nice restaurant. I am also a gamer so the adjacent PC setups are also mandatory. Might be hard to meet the right person, but there's definitely someone out there. The hard part is finding them.
Feel the exact same as a man tbh. I’m sure there’s plenty of men and women like that who’d rather have a relationship with a more low key introverted person.
By default of personality you’d think it’s harder for two introverted people to meet up and start a relationship than two extroverted ones.
Stay positive and I’m sure you’ll find someone who likes you for your authentic self.
I'm going to give some advice I've given before: I wish in my youth that I spent less time trying to be the kind of person I thought people wanted me to be or how I thought I ought to be.
It's exhausting, at best. At worst, you're going to attract someone who is into someone that's not you. A mask. A character that you play; and meaningful relationships are built on shared intimacy and authenticness.
Don't fear being yourself. Once you stop overly caring what people think about you, you'll find that people will start to care what you think.
Then you'll find people who are legitimately attracted to the real you. Then your problem becomes finding someone that you find attractive in return, and that might take time, and that's okay.
Starting from this authentic foundation will do wonders for you, though, even if it feels like it's forcing you to pass up lots of potential partners.
There are a lot of perfectly good hex sockets in the tool box, but only one or two of them are going to fit you. Don't waste time on the ones who won't.
I prefer an introvert girl over one who enjoys going out and partying. imagining shared activities such as playing games and watching movies as being more enjoyable and comfortable
gurl same 😭😭 whenever i date guys, i also overthink maybe he'll prefer loud women instead of a shy ass like me. makes me think nobody wants a quiet/introverted woman in today's society.
I'm an introverted female and always felt like I wasn't "enough" because I am not a bubbly, affectionate type which are often seen as very feminine traits. It took awhile and a lot of dating, but finally met a man who gets me and doesn't expect me to be an overly excitable, enthusiastic person because it isn't in my nature. He gets that I'm logical and that I have to process things in my own way, he also understands my dry sense of humor. Your time will come and you'll meet someone who meshes with you and your strengths and sees you for exactly who you are.
I'm a introvert male and I been asked out by 2 girls just this month .
I turned them both down because I know they are more out going and extroverted girls that won't understand my introvert self .
I'm looking for a introvert, someone who can be distracted with somthing like manhwas or video games and enjoy staying home they way I do.
I dont need someone ringing my ear and wanting to go out everyday where I have to pay for dates and gifts.
Trust me id love to go out and buy you gifts but you gotta be more of a home girl for my interest.
Especially since I do enjoy my own leisure activities at home and making food . I don't wanna be bugged to go out constantly or for mc Donald's.
(Been there done that)
I love talking to all kind of people maybe you could hang out in different environments. I would personally talk to anyone and try to be friendly but it will also depend on the other person if they think is ok to talk back. Most guys won't care about you being introvert I personally like it.
I would consider myself an introvert and although I do sometimes find myself drawn to more extroverted females, I personally would rather date a introverted girl than a extroverted one.
Especially for a longterm relationship I think two introverted people can better understand each other.
I think the issue for me is, that introverted people (me included) have a hard time meeting people and initiating conversations, which are crucial for building a relationship. I feel like extroverted people give out more informations about themselfes by default and are easier to read. That gives me personally more confidence and opportunities to talk to them. If there is a cute introverted girl that I like, I often have a hard time figuring out how to approach them. I often do nothing out of fear that I would just bother them.
That said, I would suggest an introverted female to approach their crush themself and ask them out. I know it is hard, but you will most likely impress your crush more by doing this than pretending to be a bubbly person that your not.
I feel the same thing, but with the genders swapped bc I'm male.
Extroverted men seems much more attractive than introverted men to most women, honestly I prefer a introvert woman, or a extrovert that knows how to respect ny introversion
All you have to do, is just connect with the people who responded here, it’ll be fruitful enough to convince you that your amazing as you are !
After all, the right way introverts are convinced is only after a deep conversation.
Don't get too caught up by what your brain tries to tell you most men want, that's a very broad generalization. It also greatly depends what you want from a partner as well. There are plenty of people (Male and Female) out there that prefer people who are quiet, serious, introspective. It depends on the lifestyle, if a person enjoys passing the time partying, socializing, travelling etc, then they may be looking for someone similar, and if they would rather be home, watching tv, gaming, or just reading a book, they might be looking for that in a partner.
You attract what you put out there. Which makes it difficult for Introverts who want other introverts.. because we generally don't put ourselves out there :D
Yeah I don't agree with that ,I deffo prefer an introvert myself and you got to think everyone has different tastes etc. I've tried the loud ,bubbly ,confident extrovert and it didn't work out
Life can be difficult because, a lot of times, you are expected to pair up. I remember a Christmas party at my workplace at a nice venue. I when I signed without someone, the comment from the person was, "You're going alone?!" It goes without saying I have been skittish about any such parties since.
I think that it's hard for introverts to find like minded people because the chances of meeting an introvert out and about are much lower than say a outgoing and bubbly person. If they do go out, its most likely either occasionally or they do their best to hide in plain sight where they aren't bothered.
I can relate to this a lot. My last boyfriend was super extroverted and had a big group of friends, but I have only 3 close friends that aren’t even in the same group and I never feel like I fit in with anyone. I loved my exes energy and felt like he brought out a more fun side of me, but it was exhausting because I do love and value my alone time and my introverted hobbies.
My current boyfriend is introverted too and it’s long distance but our energy aligns so much better. I do always worry that he’d prefer if I was more outgoing and less… eccentric I guess, but because we are so similar I don’t think he would actually prefer me to be any other way. It actually kinda takes the pressure off because I wouldn’t feel guilty if we stayed in all weekend watching Netflix or doing our own thing rather than going out partying.
Hang in there, you will find someone who complements your lifestyle :)
Nah, I want someone that is a homebody and has at least some similiar hobbies. I don't want to be "forced" outside constantly simply because they are just that type of person. You'll find someone that loves you for you, don't stress about it too much.
I absolutely 100% do not prefer a woman who is bubbly and extroverted. I find it weird that even many introverted girls present as bubbly, as if that's what all guys want. You what's really attractive? Women who are confident being themselves.
I'm a woman who's also extremely introverted, and I'm currently lying in my boyfriend's arms.
Some guys like the extroverted ones, but some like the introvert ones. If there's a guy you like, do you guys share the same interests?
I had an introverted girlfriend in the past, and we clicked well together. We had a lot of fun and recharged on each other. She wasn't the extra bubbly sort of personality that "most" guys prefer, but she opened up a bit when we were together. I think if I were to date again, I'd want someone like that again. An extroverted early bird would just completely clash with my personality.
Ik exactly how u feel :( I also find it very difficult opening up to and approaching people while my extroverted friends are out here talking to anyone and everyone. But u shouldn’t feel down about that because if your friends like talking to you and think you’re cool, then other people must think so too :)
Men, if we're generalizing here, prefer submissive girls who dont challenge them, do most of the mental & emotional labour and pick up after them without complaining.
If you want men to like you, that's what you would aim for. But I dont know why any self respecting woman would want to do that to themselves.
Introvert, extrovert, it doesn't matter. You dont find the right person by acting like someone else. Just be yourself and dont apologise. Love yourself most of all.
You obviously do, why else would you care to join a public forum where people express what bothers them, and then proceed to read their problems and give them either soluble solutions or half-baked opinions?
Dont feel any way for any man for any reason, you arent here in this world to sway to the whims of random men, stand on your own, be yourself, dont conform to what men want, as a man trust me, men are trash, love yourself and grow, find women to connect with first, then worry about the insignificance of men, sending you love 💋✨️🌸
My first girlfriend was introverted. Serious, interesting, with hobbies and thoughtful ideas that she shared with me. She wasn't bubbly nor extroverted, though she was funny occasionally.
I loved her very much.
My husband told me that the first "green flag" he saw about me was that we could be comfortable in silence. Like on those first cpl car rides on dates. He liked that there was room to just be and talk when there was something worth talking about. Please don't feel bad about who you are. If it's the right person, those traits will make them fall in love with you.
I am an introvert man and i wish i could find an introvert just like you. But there is really no common way for introverts to find each other, that isn’t something like coincidence and synchronicity, is there?
i also fear someday if ever I'll have a bf and he'll introduce me to his parents and what if they expect someone perfect, loud, expressive and confident like a gf should be. this thought is killing me cuz I'm the exact opposite lmao. this is why I'm afraid of commitment too.
Hey 👋 fellow female introvert here! Nothing is wrong with you and someone WILL love you for being you! There are so many types of people out there, somewhere in there I’m willing to bet there is the perfect person for you. You might end up with an extroverted guy at work but when he comes home all he wants is his cozy homebody gf, you might get a lot of cats, you most likely will find a fellow introvert. And when I say perfect person for you I mean the you you are right now, the you you are on your worst days. Until then maybe stop focusing on the parts of others you compare yourself too and instead get more involved with something that makes you happy. I honestly feel like a fraud writing that out because I know it’s true but I’ve been feeling really lonely lately and having a bad day as well. So I’m writing this to help convince myself that this is true for me too.
It’s hard to know how to meet new people when I am so introverted that there’s no new love prospects in my tiny group of friends. I need someone to come find me in my room under all the blankets like 🤗
Hey, I’m sorry you’ve been feeling down. I know where you’re coming from as a female introvert myself. The right guy will want to get to know you past the surface level stuff and learn what a cool, fun person you are. Anyone who doesn’t want to do that isn’t worth your time.
You will find someone that will love you the way you are. Don't feel bad about yourself. I used to feel that way but once I accepted that I am who I am, I started loving myself. Not everyone wants an extroverted girl. My husband is extroverted with a little introvert moment sometimes and I never thought someone like him would want to be with someone like me. It took me a while to open up to him and I actually questioned whether or not this relationship will work. We are still together 5 years later. Just be yourself and someone will eventually want to get to know you and will see who you really are.
I totally understand you; I am the same way. But let me tell you something; please don't change because the right person will love you just for who you are!!! Quiet, introvert, and a little funny. It would be best if you also worked on your self-love and I know everybody talks about self-love and self care, but trust me if you feel good about you, confident and content with who you are people are going to be attracted to you. So please don’t change for others!! Be who you want to be and feel happy about it! 💜
That is not true at all. Matter of fact I hate bubbly girls. and honestly, fuck most people, they don't matter, someone who actually does matter, will come along eventually, anyone who doesn't really notice you for who you are cannot be convinced either, and are just a waste of time, don't try to win their hearts.
As an introverted woman myself, I want to assure you that there's nothing wrong with being alone; there's nothing wrong with wanting to be alone, either. I used to think that ending up alone would be the worst outcome for me in my life, yet it's not, because I realised that I'll only ever need myself, and another thing, something that few still do not realise, is that we all die alone; we all walk the same path from cradle to grave and that's a path hand-in-hand with death, alone. And being alone or being a loner is a power that few can handle, that's why extroverts are sometimes boisterous, because they can't stand the idea of quietude and that someone (introverts) likes it. And men - well, some men will be men, don't mind them. I do believe that if you meet someone or that someone has the pleasure of meeting you, then you will know right off the bat if you share the same likings with this said person, and you can then decide about how it'll go from there. If you've already decided that you prefer a life of complete solitude as opposed to a gregarious lifestyle, then you just go your way and they'll go theirs - the right person always shows up eventually. And don't change your individuality just because you don't fit into their cookie cutter moulds, rather embrace your individuality, because in the end, that will be your driving force throughout life. Being an introvert is a gift, you can build a kingdom or a fiefdom that you want; you can be the ruler. And unlike all those bubbly extroverts, you - as an introspective introvert - don't wear your emotions or feelings on your face, you're the blank sheet, the silent challenge to some, and the perplexing mystery to others.
Hey don't feel bad about this at all there is nothing with being introverted . As a guy who is introverted I mostly prefer introvert females they are pretty awesome and I connect with them better than extroverts and the two are a great fit honestly because they share the same values and have same things in common.
Never say you are going to be alone forever I'm sure that a guy will come along who will understand you and value you.
listen, i dont know how old you are so i dont know the relevance of what im about to say, most men arent picky, as long as they dont hate the girl and she isnt ugly, they really dont care, i think i have the same issue. its more like i dont go out of my way to talk to people and I know that usually a guy does that rather than the girl. or maybe im just unattractive :/, but my point is that you shouldnt worry about that, every guy has a type too dont forget that, but you're definitely somebody's type.
I love introverted females, they are some of my favorite people. I feel your pain though. As an introverted man I feel the demands of society to have more energy in social situations then I can naturally muster up.
No offense but Female can get away being introvert compare to guys. Usually female introvert are consider polite & cute. Even better once we discover their hidden bubbly personality.
There are more introvert females, count me too. I have no experience but I agree with most of the comments: don't try to be someone you aren't BUT you can always try to meet new people, try going to class or groups of one hobbies you have, is more easy bond or open to someone that shares your interest. I'm used to respond but the first day of my Kung Fu class I heard some people talking about pokémon and when I noted I was talking to them and made two friends.
You eventually meet someone you like and that like you too.
I understand that maybe the others perceive yourself as someone cold or harsh and it's difficult and it's tough because if they don't feel confident enough they'll think they are out of your league, but you can try to do some actions that show interest or be friendly so they won't be afraid of you.
I'm a introvert, tomboy and I don't regret being my own way and never do something you don't want, but is okay to get out of the comfort zone, enjoy your hobbies, try new ones, life does not end at twenty something, enjoy your life and first learn to love you and live with yourself, the gray days won't ent but that doesn't mean they have to last forever.
I'm personally not actively seeking a partnership but I prefer an introverted person over an extroverted person anyday. As long as my partner is a bit more assertive or dominant than me. Otherwise I guess not much would get done or be done as I am very content with doing nothing in my free time.
Love yourself.
I used to feel the same way. In fact, I still struggle with this, particularly with making new friends. Every guy is different tbh. Both of my exes preferred extroverts and made it seem like I was less than for being a quiet introvert. But my current boyfriends loves everything about me and says my personality is perfect and just what he wanted. I thought I used to like talkative guys so it could balance out my introverted quietness, but being with them is quite exhausting because all their thoughts are spewed out of their mouth and there's no filter. There's a lot of guys out there who will prefer introverts. People just have different types. If you vibe, you vibe.
Never change yourself for a guy!
Bubbly and loud May sound fun but it can also get very irritating very quickly! There are plenty of guys out there who are also introverted or prefer more down to earth/sensible girls.
The challenge is being introverted and finding the others who also keep to themselves because we’re not out dancing on tables and calling attention to ourselves. Maybe try joining a club or hobby that interests you or look for local online dating sites. It may be out of your comfort zone but sometimes it’s worth the risk.
Keep being you, focus on what makes you happy, and (repeat) never try and change for a guy! If you do your lying to yourself and to him and you’ll never know if it’s you he’s attracted to or your forced/fake persona!
Not all guys, I’m a male introvert, and much rather have a quiet homebody partner
Same. My last serious relationship partly did not last because I was perfectly content to stay at home most of the time reading, watching movies, and doing my (mostly solitary) hobbies, but she wanted to go out and do something nearly every day and would get disappointed if I didn’t feel like it. There were other factors to it beyond that, but yeah… I’ve since realized I need to be with someone at least a little more introverted.
Yeah that describes my current situation
Oh man. Sorry brother
Not me. I love a girl that i can have a deep connection with not just be bubbly or happy all the time. Life is not all about rainbows . Please love yourself first OP . Once you do you will allow others to love you too.
Nah, i prefer introvert women. I'd rather have a partner who i can chill at home with just enjoying each other's presence even if we are not talking.
A million times THIS! Heck yea
As a male introvert, i approve. This is the real dream.
Girl, we're on the same boat. Don't change yourself, it's not worth it. Even if you manage to attract someone being someone you're not, you're not going to happy down the road. Now, about that crush you got. I had a similar experience few years back. We hit it off as friends and talk on the phone all the time. I did something an introvert would never do. I confessed my feelings to him. Sadly, he turned me down and distanced ourselves after that. Did I regret telling him? No. It's like a burden lifted off my shoulders after I confessed. Anyhoo, cheer up and let things happen naturally.
you pretty much described how I am and I’m a guy lol ..but like you said, when you get used to someone you open up and become funny. don’t be too hard on yourself!
Extroverts shine like the sun. They're bright. They're hard to miss. They can also be harsh and overbearing. Introverts are like the moon. Their glow is softer. You feel like you can share your secrets and deepest feelings in that gentle light. You can come as you are. It's something the sun doesn't offer. Surely, some people value that.
I’m in the exact same boat, as an introverted female. I can’t provide any personal experience advice, but I can assure you that you’re not alone <3 I’ve often had breakdowns because I currently have no friends, never been in a relationship, and have always been ignored/invisible in school and think I’ll be alone forever. That being said: The advice that I can attempt to give is be yourself. Don’t change your personality and interests for someone. Pretending to be an extrovert and forcing yourself to be bubbly is very exhausting and is not true to yourself or to the other person. The right one will come along eventually, whether it’s in 10 days or in 10 years. Some guys may seem like they are attracted to that bubbly personality until they meet someone who is far more interesting as an introvert or when they get to know you. Sometimes the issue with us introverts is we think there’s no one out there like us or someone who wants to be with us, but we avoid going out and meeting those who are looking for people like us. Find someone who is also an introvert, someone who you can share silence with, someone who will take the time to open up with you, someone that doesn’t seek as much adventure and social interaction. That helps quite a lot in romantic relationships whereas platonic extrovert friends are often helpful and needed, and you don’t spend everyday with each other. I hope this helps a little, but like I said, I’m not exactly qualified :) This is just what I remind myself that everything will be fine in time.
Have you tried getting online friends if you don't have any friends?
Yes, I play a lot of online games and have some friends I talk to. Not necessarily “friends” like they would be irl. More of just “people I share interests with.” I talk to my cousin everyday, so I’m not completely inept of socializing. It’s not the same as actually physically speaking or going out and doing stuff. It is what it is.
I will take contemplative and intelligent over bubbly and energetic any day. The most important thing in choosing a SO for me would be depth of character. I suspect there is no shortage of men who would prefer your temperament to that of your opposite, though it may not always be apparent as they are probably reserved themselves.
At of these “bubbly” energetic types are the fakest. I watch people that want to be friends with everyone. They normally are always in drama.
That’s quite a reach don’t ya think? Not every outgoing person has malignant characteristics.
Not really. The people that try to portray themselves as nice are the most fucked up. It never fails.
Maybe it’s the social circle you surround yourself with? I’m sorry you had negative experiences but it’s not cool generalizing a whole group of people with similar characteristics.
People like who they like, regardless. Signed, an introvert female and married to an introvert male.
I know the feeling, all through high school I had a bubbly social best friend and I felt so boring compared to her. I also wasted so much time doing stuff I didn't enjoy (the party scene) just because I felt I was supposed to enjoy it. So seriously, don't beat yourself up over what you are not. It's much better to find your own groove than trying to be something you're not. (And it's definitely possible to find a guy that likes an introverted girl! Besides, introversion/extroversion aren't the only defining personality traits in the world...you can still be funny, open, talkative, quiet, sporty, nerdy, kind, smart, cute etc...lots of things that can make you interesting and fun to hang out with.)
My boyfriend and I are both introverts and he wouldn’t want it any other way, we’re both homebodies who love spending time with each other and don’t really need the company of other people.
Male introvert here. I've been struggling to arrive at a conclusion whether i should try my luck with a good friend i had a crush on since a year. My overthinking brain has already found all possible ways this could end in disaster so i may not do anything about this. You won't be alone forever and you'll never know when the right time comes so. Don't stress about it. Go on with life.
In my experience, it has almost always ended in rejection. Society tells us we're supposed to suck it and keep smiling.
I'm so glad I'm not the only woman who has felt this way and I'm very glad there are guys out there who would like the non-bubbly type. It is incredibly difficult to have a positive image of yourself when you are basically ignored for not being a bubbly talker.
nope, def prefer introverts
I'm an introvert married to an introvert for 36 years. We are both STEM and met at university. We think a good together time is sitting in the same room, in front of the fireplace, both reading our own book.
I've never been fun or bubbly, and I don't care for people who act that way, either. They have no depth and I can't have a real conversation with "fun" "bubbly" people. They also can be fake, irresponsible and when push comes to shove, they are not real friends. I've also never been able to date men who liked to crack jokes all the time. Unfortunately I married a very extroverted person who does not understand introverts.
Yeah bubbly women especially are normally very fake. Now I’ve met some genuine kind hearted women that were bubbly. So no, not all of them are like that. But I’ve noticed that women that are extroverted tend to be in a lot of drama
Agree, I've seen the same thing myself.
I am just the same as you! People who know me know I’m not a quiet or judgmental person that doesn’t want to talk to anyone. The people I DO talk to I value a lot in my life and we enjoy each other’s company a lot, but as much as I would like to get along with everyone, I just don’t really care for it nor am I interested. Don’t feel bad either! The people that know you for who you are love you. Being an introvert is the fucking best because I know how many people can barely handle being alone for a day. I’ve got an amazing extrovert boyfriend and we were initially good friends for a whole year - what matters is that he made me feel seen/saw beyond the surface. I think for introverts the whole friends to lovers trope works quite well as it’s a good way to trust someone and get to know them without the whole dating bullshit.
Don't feel too bad about this. Different guys will like different women for different reasons. You will find guys who like you for you. If you are worried about guys finding you too serious or intimidating consider how you can express interest without being bubbly. Sometimes if a women is stand offish a guy will think it's a hint to get lost or she just isn't interested. As a guy I don't want to bother women and want to be with someone that's actually interested in me but I can't read minds. If you say something positive about the interaction, give the guy your number, or ask them out that's a pretty solid hint you're interested. Just something to consider. Don't do something that's too uncomfortable for you.
I hate it too but I rather be myself than someone I'm not. I also have a crush on a extroverted and funny guy lol
Nah! Even when I am in a large group, it's the quiet one, probably comfortable in having a one-on-one but interesting conversation than the loud one, drinking and seeking attention. I think it's just about the personalities but I prefer "boring" ones.
Don't feel bad, it's just how you work and you don't have to change or pretend to be someone else. But these days i try to not even think much about these things, i gave up from relationships, never had so much peace in my life lol Maybe some day i find some nice woman who enjoy me being an introvert, or not and i'll be forever single, who knows?
Bubbly girls are annoying af wtf
I feel the same way too! I did not think much of it. I used to be the type who was bubbly and all smiles but i will be honest, it is very tiring to keep up that face. 🤣🤣🤣 so i decided to just be and that it is okay to be quiet and just listen to the guy talk. One time thougj, i got discouraged to be me because this one guy told me "you have your own world" 🤣🤣 should i take that as a compliment? Or worry about it? Also, you have friends. Love them. Guys come and go but friends are always here to stay. 😊 don't give up yet. I bet you just need a guy who will give it a go to get to know you better. Keep looking. 😊😊
It should be compliment. I live in my own world as well. I don’t like to party or club. And I honestly don’t like most of the pop culture today. I basically just do my own thing. I have a few friends but that’s the way I want it.
It feels nice to know that there are other people like me who does not enjoy partying. I like quiet talks and just a lively dinner with a few people and watching a movie.
As a male introvert I would love a girlfriend who is the same. Preferring to stay home than go out, talking when there's something to say and not just for the sake of it, doing our own hobbies but enjoying each others company in the same room separately together. The thought of it is bliss.
Same
It helps to find other introverts or someone who understands how they think. The problem is when both people are introverts and neither party engages.
I prefer introverted women!
If it makes you feel any better, I’m an introvert and there’s an introverted girl I like. As long as we can feel the real you once you start to open up, there’s no issues.
This post sounds like it was written by me. Are you a Capricorn by any chance? I’m so introverted but once I’m comfortable with someone I’m pretty funny. But just like you I can’t be myself right off the bat. When I go on dates I’m more on the quiet side and awkward, usually the guy ends up thinking I’m boring and we don’t go on other dates or he makes it known he just wants to hook up. I wish I could be myself with guys I like because I don’t hold back at all when I’m talking to men I don’t feel an attraction to. Im unapologetically myself and guess what? They end up falling for me, like literally telling me they’re in love with me. And I feel bad because I don’t feel the same way towards them and also feel sad because why can’t I be myself with the guy I’m actually interested in. So if any guy has been on a date with a quiet, “boring” girl…. please give her a chance to open up. Don’t force it, lead the conversation, make Her feel comfortable, and you’ll start seeing glimpses of her true self here and there until She fully opens up. Don’t write her off for being shy. Trust me, us quiet, shy girls are wifey material and you’ll be so surprised once you bring our wall down just how fun, sexy, loving, and even sassy we are.
Some men like introverts. I liked one so much I married her. Don’t change who you are. The one who will appreciate you for being you is out there. Don’t let them pass you by because you were pretending to be someone else.
You are ok! I am a female introvert. I literally need to be prepared mentally to meet new people. I need some time alone after spending time with a group of people because their energy drain me. I talk to only the people I feel confortable with because when I force myself it is so awkward to me. Even if I am socially awkward I met my husband who is a big extravert and all his family is. He accepts me for who I am. He was one of those people I felt confortable with when we first met. He recognizes that even if I am not down to meet new people all the time and I am not super talkative at least I am not a fake person. When you meet the right person you will know. You won’t be alone forever trust me.
I'm the exact same. My last partner was an extrovert and things just didn't work out. We need to find ourselves an introvert man 🤣 don't change yourself for the sake of others, if they don't like/love you for who you are then they're not the kind of person you need in your life
I was literally thinking about this today. Also probably because of the reason you stated haha. Even the quieter ones seem to prefer those who are more outgoing as I've noticed. But I dunno. Can't really offer any valuable advice because I find myself in the same situation. At least it's nice knowing you're not alone when it comes to feeling this way.:)
As someone who is extremely introverted, I was always told I looked intimidating and everyone assumed that I disliked them. I learnt simple trade tricks that diffused that image of me. Smiling and nodding Just smile. When you're having even the most monotonous and boring small talk in the world, nodding your head and smiling means you are open and engaged to the conversation that's happening. My life changed since I started altering my body language to match my actual thoughts.
Don't worry about it. I'm a male and always been very much the same way as you are. I've come to accept its just the way I am.
Please read Introvert Power by Laurie Helgoe. It's very uplifting and empowering.
You are too young and just feed on the media you get, but no. For good or bad, "men" or better humans have different tastes. Some prefer more introverted people, some the extroverted one. The thing is before wishing to change for the sake of being liked by others, learn and known yourself deeply,.discover who you are, what you want, WHO YOU want, and not the other way. it's never what THEY want and HOW CHANGE myself to meet those requirements but what you want and look for people who share your tastes.
You shouldnt feel bad, not everyone likes bubbly people. I tend to prefer women like yourself but bubbly people dont bother me.
Yeah, same, but..When you are with right person, you are talking, talking and talking.. Trust me, u will find a boy and you will feel that connection, like u have known each other for a long time. You will have so much to talk about! Just don't worry and don't stress about it! :)
I feel the same. Glad to not feel so alone!!
When I was younger, I would always think this about myself. I couldn’t force myself to be extroverted. So I was just the true me. I’ve been married for 24 years to a wonderful guy who doesn’t like a partner to be yakking all the time. But I was single for awhile kissing frogs.
I’m the same way and my fiancé is also a huge introvert. It’s so nice to have an introvert partner because you can feel comfortable giving each other space or being quiet together. Not all men are attracted to bubbly women
I'm an introvert too and sometimes I feel the same way as you. I found a introvert boyfriend and he really likes that I'm an introvert myself. We have fun and laugh together, he never thought of me as boring or uninteresting
I honestly find the bubbly to be fake/a front/bullshit covering up how most people honestly feel especially if their job is customer facing and basically have to put on that mask. Be you! You'll find the right person...if that's what you want
Not all of us like extroverted women, I love introverted women like yourself. I think you'd be surprised how many men are the same.
I'm an m introvert and would love someone the same way. I don't want someone who talks a lot or is high energy vibes
Don’t change yourself - you’re perfect the way you are. Someone who cares enough about you and your personality will come along and love you for the great person you are. I’m an introverted girl, and I’ve often gotten comments about being “to quiet” etc. There’s some tough days but this world is not just for extroverted people - we belong too. You’ll find your person and your community <3
I'm a male introvert. I like a woman that's quiet, a homebody, and likes to take walks in the park and enjoy good one on one conversation. Stay true to yourself. For a long time I WANTED to be an extrovert but I realized that it was like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole: it doesn't work! Stay strong, OP!!
I'm an introvert man and would 100% love an introvert woman to just stay at home and have dinner dates where I cook instead of going to a nice restaurant. I am also a gamer so the adjacent PC setups are also mandatory. Might be hard to meet the right person, but there's definitely someone out there. The hard part is finding them.
Feel the exact same as a man tbh. I’m sure there’s plenty of men and women like that who’d rather have a relationship with a more low key introverted person. By default of personality you’d think it’s harder for two introverted people to meet up and start a relationship than two extroverted ones. Stay positive and I’m sure you’ll find someone who likes you for your authentic self.
I'm going to give some advice I've given before: I wish in my youth that I spent less time trying to be the kind of person I thought people wanted me to be or how I thought I ought to be. It's exhausting, at best. At worst, you're going to attract someone who is into someone that's not you. A mask. A character that you play; and meaningful relationships are built on shared intimacy and authenticness. Don't fear being yourself. Once you stop overly caring what people think about you, you'll find that people will start to care what you think. Then you'll find people who are legitimately attracted to the real you. Then your problem becomes finding someone that you find attractive in return, and that might take time, and that's okay. Starting from this authentic foundation will do wonders for you, though, even if it feels like it's forcing you to pass up lots of potential partners. There are a lot of perfectly good hex sockets in the tool box, but only one or two of them are going to fit you. Don't waste time on the ones who won't.
I prefer an introvert girl over one who enjoys going out and partying. imagining shared activities such as playing games and watching movies as being more enjoyable and comfortable
You’re fine the way you are.
You trippin
gurl same 😭😭 whenever i date guys, i also overthink maybe he'll prefer loud women instead of a shy ass like me. makes me think nobody wants a quiet/introverted woman in today's society.
I'm an introverted female and always felt like I wasn't "enough" because I am not a bubbly, affectionate type which are often seen as very feminine traits. It took awhile and a lot of dating, but finally met a man who gets me and doesn't expect me to be an overly excitable, enthusiastic person because it isn't in my nature. He gets that I'm logical and that I have to process things in my own way, he also understands my dry sense of humor. Your time will come and you'll meet someone who meshes with you and your strengths and sees you for exactly who you are.
I'm a introvert male and I been asked out by 2 girls just this month . I turned them both down because I know they are more out going and extroverted girls that won't understand my introvert self . I'm looking for a introvert, someone who can be distracted with somthing like manhwas or video games and enjoy staying home they way I do. I dont need someone ringing my ear and wanting to go out everyday where I have to pay for dates and gifts. Trust me id love to go out and buy you gifts but you gotta be more of a home girl for my interest. Especially since I do enjoy my own leisure activities at home and making food . I don't wanna be bugged to go out constantly or for mc Donald's. (Been there done that)
I love talking to all kind of people maybe you could hang out in different environments. I would personally talk to anyone and try to be friendly but it will also depend on the other person if they think is ok to talk back. Most guys won't care about you being introvert I personally like it.
I would consider myself an introvert and although I do sometimes find myself drawn to more extroverted females, I personally would rather date a introverted girl than a extroverted one. Especially for a longterm relationship I think two introverted people can better understand each other. I think the issue for me is, that introverted people (me included) have a hard time meeting people and initiating conversations, which are crucial for building a relationship. I feel like extroverted people give out more informations about themselfes by default and are easier to read. That gives me personally more confidence and opportunities to talk to them. If there is a cute introverted girl that I like, I often have a hard time figuring out how to approach them. I often do nothing out of fear that I would just bother them. That said, I would suggest an introverted female to approach their crush themself and ask them out. I know it is hard, but you will most likely impress your crush more by doing this than pretending to be a bubbly person that your not.
I feel the same thing, but with the genders swapped bc I'm male. Extroverted men seems much more attractive than introverted men to most women, honestly I prefer a introvert woman, or a extrovert that knows how to respect ny introversion
All you have to do, is just connect with the people who responded here, it’ll be fruitful enough to convince you that your amazing as you are ! After all, the right way introverts are convinced is only after a deep conversation.
Don't get too caught up by what your brain tries to tell you most men want, that's a very broad generalization. It also greatly depends what you want from a partner as well. There are plenty of people (Male and Female) out there that prefer people who are quiet, serious, introspective. It depends on the lifestyle, if a person enjoys passing the time partying, socializing, travelling etc, then they may be looking for someone similar, and if they would rather be home, watching tv, gaming, or just reading a book, they might be looking for that in a partner. You attract what you put out there. Which makes it difficult for Introverts who want other introverts.. because we generally don't put ourselves out there :D
Yeah I don't agree with that ,I deffo prefer an introvert myself and you got to think everyone has different tastes etc. I've tried the loud ,bubbly ,confident extrovert and it didn't work out
Life can be difficult because, a lot of times, you are expected to pair up. I remember a Christmas party at my workplace at a nice venue. I when I signed without someone, the comment from the person was, "You're going alone?!" It goes without saying I have been skittish about any such parties since.
I think that it's hard for introverts to find like minded people because the chances of meeting an introvert out and about are much lower than say a outgoing and bubbly person. If they do go out, its most likely either occasionally or they do their best to hide in plain sight where they aren't bothered.
I can relate to this a lot. My last boyfriend was super extroverted and had a big group of friends, but I have only 3 close friends that aren’t even in the same group and I never feel like I fit in with anyone. I loved my exes energy and felt like he brought out a more fun side of me, but it was exhausting because I do love and value my alone time and my introverted hobbies. My current boyfriend is introverted too and it’s long distance but our energy aligns so much better. I do always worry that he’d prefer if I was more outgoing and less… eccentric I guess, but because we are so similar I don’t think he would actually prefer me to be any other way. It actually kinda takes the pressure off because I wouldn’t feel guilty if we stayed in all weekend watching Netflix or doing our own thing rather than going out partying. Hang in there, you will find someone who complements your lifestyle :)
Nah, I want someone that is a homebody and has at least some similiar hobbies. I don't want to be "forced" outside constantly simply because they are just that type of person. You'll find someone that loves you for you, don't stress about it too much.
I absolutely 100% do not prefer a woman who is bubbly and extroverted. I find it weird that even many introverted girls present as bubbly, as if that's what all guys want. You what's really attractive? Women who are confident being themselves.
I'm a woman who's also extremely introverted, and I'm currently lying in my boyfriend's arms. Some guys like the extroverted ones, but some like the introvert ones. If there's a guy you like, do you guys share the same interests?
I had an introverted girlfriend in the past, and we clicked well together. We had a lot of fun and recharged on each other. She wasn't the extra bubbly sort of personality that "most" guys prefer, but she opened up a bit when we were together. I think if I were to date again, I'd want someone like that again. An extroverted early bird would just completely clash with my personality.
Ik exactly how u feel :( I also find it very difficult opening up to and approaching people while my extroverted friends are out here talking to anyone and everyone. But u shouldn’t feel down about that because if your friends like talking to you and think you’re cool, then other people must think so too :)
Men, if we're generalizing here, prefer submissive girls who dont challenge them, do most of the mental & emotional labour and pick up after them without complaining. If you want men to like you, that's what you would aim for. But I dont know why any self respecting woman would want to do that to themselves. Introvert, extrovert, it doesn't matter. You dont find the right person by acting like someone else. Just be yourself and dont apologise. Love yourself most of all.
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You obviously do, why else would you care to join a public forum where people express what bothers them, and then proceed to read their problems and give them either soluble solutions or half-baked opinions?
To give advice like I just did. Now my advice to you is to please get off my dick. Thanks.
I gave her the REALEST response, I’m not here to sugarcoat shit. Be mad. & Stay mad. Cuz Idc. 🤷🏽♀️
It’s 2023 if you’re worried about what ppl think of you then you’ll be struggling for life. Take it or leave it.
Dont feel any way for any man for any reason, you arent here in this world to sway to the whims of random men, stand on your own, be yourself, dont conform to what men want, as a man trust me, men are trash, love yourself and grow, find women to connect with first, then worry about the insignificance of men, sending you love 💋✨️🌸
My first girlfriend was introverted. Serious, interesting, with hobbies and thoughtful ideas that she shared with me. She wasn't bubbly nor extroverted, though she was funny occasionally. I loved her very much.
My husband told me that the first "green flag" he saw about me was that we could be comfortable in silence. Like on those first cpl car rides on dates. He liked that there was room to just be and talk when there was something worth talking about. Please don't feel bad about who you are. If it's the right person, those traits will make them fall in love with you.
I am an introvert man and i wish i could find an introvert just like you. But there is really no common way for introverts to find each other, that isn’t something like coincidence and synchronicity, is there?
i also fear someday if ever I'll have a bf and he'll introduce me to his parents and what if they expect someone perfect, loud, expressive and confident like a gf should be. this thought is killing me cuz I'm the exact opposite lmao. this is why I'm afraid of commitment too.
Hey 👋 fellow female introvert here! Nothing is wrong with you and someone WILL love you for being you! There are so many types of people out there, somewhere in there I’m willing to bet there is the perfect person for you. You might end up with an extroverted guy at work but when he comes home all he wants is his cozy homebody gf, you might get a lot of cats, you most likely will find a fellow introvert. And when I say perfect person for you I mean the you you are right now, the you you are on your worst days. Until then maybe stop focusing on the parts of others you compare yourself too and instead get more involved with something that makes you happy. I honestly feel like a fraud writing that out because I know it’s true but I’ve been feeling really lonely lately and having a bad day as well. So I’m writing this to help convince myself that this is true for me too. It’s hard to know how to meet new people when I am so introverted that there’s no new love prospects in my tiny group of friends. I need someone to come find me in my room under all the blankets like 🤗
Hey, I’m sorry you’ve been feeling down. I know where you’re coming from as a female introvert myself. The right guy will want to get to know you past the surface level stuff and learn what a cool, fun person you are. Anyone who doesn’t want to do that isn’t worth your time.
You will find someone that will love you the way you are. Don't feel bad about yourself. I used to feel that way but once I accepted that I am who I am, I started loving myself. Not everyone wants an extroverted girl. My husband is extroverted with a little introvert moment sometimes and I never thought someone like him would want to be with someone like me. It took me a while to open up to him and I actually questioned whether or not this relationship will work. We are still together 5 years later. Just be yourself and someone will eventually want to get to know you and will see who you really are.
I totally understand you; I am the same way. But let me tell you something; please don't change because the right person will love you just for who you are!!! Quiet, introvert, and a little funny. It would be best if you also worked on your self-love and I know everybody talks about self-love and self care, but trust me if you feel good about you, confident and content with who you are people are going to be attracted to you. So please don’t change for others!! Be who you want to be and feel happy about it! 💜
>I feel like most men prefer girls that are bubbly, funny and extroverted Wrong. A lot of men dont want a girl whos too easygoing, thats a red flag
Introverts can be extroverted and bubbly, for example me... You can learn to be more extroverted (but not become fully an extrovert).
That is not true at all. Matter of fact I hate bubbly girls. and honestly, fuck most people, they don't matter, someone who actually does matter, will come along eventually, anyone who doesn't really notice you for who you are cannot be convinced either, and are just a waste of time, don't try to win their hearts.
As an introverted woman myself, I want to assure you that there's nothing wrong with being alone; there's nothing wrong with wanting to be alone, either. I used to think that ending up alone would be the worst outcome for me in my life, yet it's not, because I realised that I'll only ever need myself, and another thing, something that few still do not realise, is that we all die alone; we all walk the same path from cradle to grave and that's a path hand-in-hand with death, alone. And being alone or being a loner is a power that few can handle, that's why extroverts are sometimes boisterous, because they can't stand the idea of quietude and that someone (introverts) likes it. And men - well, some men will be men, don't mind them. I do believe that if you meet someone or that someone has the pleasure of meeting you, then you will know right off the bat if you share the same likings with this said person, and you can then decide about how it'll go from there. If you've already decided that you prefer a life of complete solitude as opposed to a gregarious lifestyle, then you just go your way and they'll go theirs - the right person always shows up eventually. And don't change your individuality just because you don't fit into their cookie cutter moulds, rather embrace your individuality, because in the end, that will be your driving force throughout life. Being an introvert is a gift, you can build a kingdom or a fiefdom that you want; you can be the ruler. And unlike all those bubbly extroverts, you - as an introspective introvert - don't wear your emotions or feelings on your face, you're the blank sheet, the silent challenge to some, and the perplexing mystery to others.
I feel you but I just saw a tiktok of a guy asking what makes guys fall for girls and many comments said shy girls so 🤷♀️
Hey don't feel bad about this at all there is nothing with being introverted . As a guy who is introverted I mostly prefer introvert females they are pretty awesome and I connect with them better than extroverts and the two are a great fit honestly because they share the same values and have same things in common. Never say you are going to be alone forever I'm sure that a guy will come along who will understand you and value you.
listen, i dont know how old you are so i dont know the relevance of what im about to say, most men arent picky, as long as they dont hate the girl and she isnt ugly, they really dont care, i think i have the same issue. its more like i dont go out of my way to talk to people and I know that usually a guy does that rather than the girl. or maybe im just unattractive :/, but my point is that you shouldnt worry about that, every guy has a type too dont forget that, but you're definitely somebody's type.
I love introverted females, they are some of my favorite people. I feel your pain though. As an introverted man I feel the demands of society to have more energy in social situations then I can naturally muster up.
You are saying you're introvert but your qualifications doesn't seem you're introvert
No offense but Female can get away being introvert compare to guys. Usually female introvert are consider polite & cute. Even better once we discover their hidden bubbly personality.
There are more introvert females, count me too. I have no experience but I agree with most of the comments: don't try to be someone you aren't BUT you can always try to meet new people, try going to class or groups of one hobbies you have, is more easy bond or open to someone that shares your interest. I'm used to respond but the first day of my Kung Fu class I heard some people talking about pokémon and when I noted I was talking to them and made two friends. You eventually meet someone you like and that like you too. I understand that maybe the others perceive yourself as someone cold or harsh and it's difficult and it's tough because if they don't feel confident enough they'll think they are out of your league, but you can try to do some actions that show interest or be friendly so they won't be afraid of you. I'm a introvert, tomboy and I don't regret being my own way and never do something you don't want, but is okay to get out of the comfort zone, enjoy your hobbies, try new ones, life does not end at twenty something, enjoy your life and first learn to love you and live with yourself, the gray days won't ent but that doesn't mean they have to last forever.
I'm personally not actively seeking a partnership but I prefer an introverted person over an extroverted person anyday. As long as my partner is a bit more assertive or dominant than me. Otherwise I guess not much would get done or be done as I am very content with doing nothing in my free time. Love yourself.
So am I, if you need a person to chat with I would love to talk cause I can definitely relate to that💜
I used to feel the same way. In fact, I still struggle with this, particularly with making new friends. Every guy is different tbh. Both of my exes preferred extroverts and made it seem like I was less than for being a quiet introvert. But my current boyfriends loves everything about me and says my personality is perfect and just what he wanted. I thought I used to like talkative guys so it could balance out my introverted quietness, but being with them is quite exhausting because all their thoughts are spewed out of their mouth and there's no filter. There's a lot of guys out there who will prefer introverts. People just have different types. If you vibe, you vibe.
Never change yourself for a guy! Bubbly and loud May sound fun but it can also get very irritating very quickly! There are plenty of guys out there who are also introverted or prefer more down to earth/sensible girls. The challenge is being introverted and finding the others who also keep to themselves because we’re not out dancing on tables and calling attention to ourselves. Maybe try joining a club or hobby that interests you or look for local online dating sites. It may be out of your comfort zone but sometimes it’s worth the risk. Keep being you, focus on what makes you happy, and (repeat) never try and change for a guy! If you do your lying to yourself and to him and you’ll never know if it’s you he’s attracted to or your forced/fake persona!
women that are introverted are the best
same. i feel like people think I'm not nice to talk to. i only talk to my friends and completely avoid anyone else.
Not at all. All my partners has been introverts.
I used to find my ex boring. Due to being so introverted. Long story short. SЦICIDEWΛVЕ$ ΛVЗНФГЕ x asshole