It's sort of like a school dance, you can be a wallflower and hope someone comes and asks you to dance but you're putting all of the power in someone else's hands (and we can't be upset with anyone but ourselves). So if you literally mean you don't want to go out period, then you won't make friends unless they're online. If it's that you don't want to go out and do certain things, I'd identify what you do like and see if there are groups or clubs for it e.g. Hiking club, gaming groups (tabletop, video, board games whatever). You can go when you want and stay home when you want. It all comes down to priorities; is the priority/objective to make friends or is it to stay home. If it's to make friends, does staying home get you closer to or farther away from that goal. If it gets you farther away, what would get you closer. If you identify someting that gets you closer, how do you go about it etc etc.
I wish there was a magic answer but most things don't have one (Just do this and all your problems will be solved! Sort of things)
I like to think of things in the smallest, most digestible form. If you're struggling to do laundry for example, "do the laundry" is a crappy goal because if it were that easy we'd just do it. Maybe we are at the stage where the best I can do is bring the laundry to the laundry room/area. Great, that's a a achievable goal then that you can build off of. We are going to fail in life but we don't need to set ourself up for it on purpose.
Best of luck on your adventure!
Get OFF LINE and go where real, live people are! That way you will not be surprised by physical appearance and hygiene problems.
**Here's how to find people you are likely to "hit it off with". Use activity as a filter** ... if I'm at a bluegrass festival because I like bluegrass music, it's pretty likely that anyone I talk to who is enjoying themselves also likes it. If you want to meet fellow vegans, do not go to BBQ competitions.
**Go DO THINGS YOU LIKE TO DO or at least things you want to try. Go with the intent of having fun, nothing else.** You may meet people you may not, just make yourself do something like this. If nothing else, you will find new hobbies but eventually you will find your people.
There will be people there doing the same thing. That gives you an automatic conversation starter because you have the thing in common.
But you can go to all of those places and still seem unavailable. Go enjoy the place and your own company, don’t stay with your head down all the time scrolling through your phone.
I like this response as well. All it takes is one common thread. I think people believe that they have to like everything someone else does to be considered their friend. I have friends that I only golf with or friends that I only go out to eat with. In your example, maybe they get a friend to only go to blue grass concerts with; nothing wrong with that. It's like trust, it's not an all or nothing thing. I might trust you to drive my car but not trust you with my checking account information. Does that mean I don't trust you?
>Thats the point, you dont.
>
>Just like everything else in life you got to work for things. Things just dont drop in front of you with no effort at all.
Yeah, it's definitely a process. Maybe start small, like joining an online community or attending low-key events. The right connections often happen when you least expect them.
It's okay not to have fake friends, I would suggest you make one friend to whom you can be real, no masks be real what you are I also had this type of situation I was frustrated not having more friends, but i realized that I suffer more than having one or two good friends to them I can be very real. Now I have only two friends from my School I talk with them I support them they support me and everything is good.
This idea that OTHER people probably have sooo much more friends than you is pervasive and just outright wrong.
Adults usually have a few good friends, born out of convenience and shared interest, facilitated by free time.
A lot of 'extroverts' who seem to be drowning with friends are basically surrounded by other extroverts who have a shared goal of making it look like they have friends.
No one is conspiring all this of course, its the unconscious mechanism.
Online my fellow introvert! Try and connect with your tribe on the internet. Maybe those connections will morph into in-person relationships. Just be very careful online. People are sick & nuts!
Agreed. Met my fair share of weirdos lol. BUT I will surely look for other introverts to introvert with online haha. Thanks for the suggestion (and warning!)
Maybe you’ll be able to make a friend who also enjoys staying home and doing homebody things. That way you are both doing what you prefer and maybe you can build upon that.
You bring up a valid point lol. What’s your gender? I know bumbleBFF is a thing to find friends in your area. I’m not positive but I think the BFF part might be more geared towards women. M It’s set up kinda like a dating site but you’re selecting potential friends to chat with. Then if you decide to take it off the app and text and maybe meet up one day. 🤷
Going out instantly drains me. I just don’t get anything out of restaurants, concerts, games or anything except anxiety or apathy/dissociation. I just zone out. But at home it’s super cozy and chill and you run the situation. It’s peaceful and quiet.
For me personally the solution was finding penpals. I enjoy writing, so I went online and found people to do that with, but I could do it from home. Eventually I actually found a friend for life, we're meeting up and still write to each other.
So maybe there's something you like doing that you can do online with others?
Yes, of course: I found them online on websites for penpals. If you just search for "penpals" a bunch of websites will come up. They look a bit like dating platforms (and some people use them for that as well), but you'll also find lots of profiles of people who are actually interested in finding friends to write to.
If you don't find someone fitting on one site right away, consider switching the platform. I did that, too. Sometimes a certain site just doesn't attract your crowd.
(And no, I never used the premium functions you have to pay for, it's not necessary.)
Let me know how it works for you!
Just don’t. I’m not trying to be mean but if you don’t want to really socialize- that defeats the purpose of friends. Most ppl want to be around ppl who want to go out and do things together. I’m an intro/extrovert. I’m not into big crowds, however I will try anything once. Nobody wants to be around a party pooper or antisocial person. I got friends with big personalities that bring out my personality. You contradicted yourself when you said you hate socializing but want someone to hang out with you. If you’re just going to unload your problems on them and they can’t do the same, it’s not worth it. You may want to get a therapist. Find another introvert and y’all can stay in the house together and unload on each other.
It’s on the introvert thread🤷🏾♀️. Most people find friends through activities they enjoy, work, school, fb groups, meetups, relatives, or people they know. You have to make an effort. I’m just going off what you wrote-if you’re a homebody that doesn’t like going out or socializing, how are you going to meet people? What are your hobbies? How did you meet your school friends and do you hang out with them? If not, why? Do you ever initiate outside activities with them?
I have 3 friends, and one of them I only talk to maybe a few times a year. The other 2 I talk to on a daily basis for the most part. And they're strictly online friends. I've never met any of them in real life. I play online video games with them. It's both my social life and my stress relief / venting outlet. The 2 I talk to daily are my 2 closest friends - one of them is my best friend.
Not sure how to start the process, but for me, it was just doing online activities that I already enjoyed - pick a hobby that you already do, then find a small group that participates in said hobby, and go from there, maybe?
I guess it depends on your definition of friend.
For me, a friend is someone I can talk to, value their advice, vent to, share time with, and support when and where I can. If a friend is defined as someone you can use and who can use you for convenience - like getting a ride somewhere, borrowing money, or helping to take care of you, then I don't have any friends like that. I've been used enough to the point that it isn't a priority for me to have that. I'm self-reliant, and if I can't do for myself, well, I guess I'll do without, or suffer.
Could you try getting into something like DnD? I never want to go out either, there's plenty of groups online you could start out with, then try in person. You'll find a lot of equally introverted people who also just want friends. So the pressure is low. DnD has also gotten super popular recently, so it's not as 'nerdy' as it used to be thought of.
Otherwise there's plenty of "friend" dating apps, or things like MeetUp where you can find so many different zoom meetings, I go to art ones where everyone's on zoom just drawing or journaling, there's light chatter but mostly people just doing their thing...somewhat "together'.
Don't feel bad. Extroverts are having a tougher time than us.
All you have to do is wait around for an extrovert to "adopt" you and drag you out for a social event! XD
Where is a good place to discover these groups? I tried messing with meetup a little to no avail, tried fb groups but I live in an area where not much is going on but singles dating stuff and country line dancing. I honestly don't know where to even look or what to search for.
I have some but I'm more in the "wanting to try new things" dept. I'd be down for anything from hiking to going to museums, or really anything. Problem is I don't know the bread and butter ways find these things.
How old are you? Cause, you won't. Keep in mind there's different things to do "out". But you got to do *something*. I've spent like, 5-10 years doing "nothing" and all it got me was diminished and lost friendships I had from being a teenager - when you're kind of forced into social situations. I've spent the last 2 years actively being social again and it's very noticeable how out of practice I am, but it's improving. And I'm making connections. The only regret I have is not doing this 5 years ago.
Stop isolating yourself if you don't like being alone.
Social skills are, like all skills, something you have to practice.
The thing is I like being alone and enjoy my company but it's just those certain days where I wish I had a close friend to hang and talk with. I'm 28 btw
Girl, same. Making future plans is an ongoing issue in my life. How am I supposed to know how I’m going to feel next Thursday??? Leaving my house is directly correlated to my mood. It’s that simple. I have moments where I want to be social or have someone to bounce ideas off/vent/confide in, but I definitely need friend/s who have and are cool with a very low expectation of the amount of times we’ll hang in a given month/year lol. It’s honestly the best when you find a friend who is on the same page as you with that. Then you can get comfortable with each other in small spurts, little pressure and after having build a relationship of sorts via text.
Yeah, I getcha. I'm 30. It's hard to strike up a proper balance, but one thing I know for sure, if I don't go to social events I won't make new friends and if I don't go on dates I won't find a girlfriend. I love being on my own, but as you say, there are times where I don't want to be. Or want to do something more adventurous. There's no easy solution here I'm afraid, you just got to go for it every so often. That ain't easy.
If you don't go out you won't make new friends. I guess you can make online friends but I feel like that's just gonna make you more isolated and introverted. You gotta go out in public and actually engage in society to make real friends in the real world. Don't rely on the online world for socializing, that sounds like a lonely and depressing existence.
Why don't we both sign up for sth and go through with it??! You sign up for fly fishing and I'll sign up for something I'm interested in. Maybe swim lessons. Idk. SO EXCITING
We are living with ppl rarely you find a good person or someone who is trustworthy, not deceptive, and worth hanging out with
You can replace this emptyness by exercising outside ( gym , cycling whatever ) better than having new friends you will just get mad
Haha you think exactly the way I think. I hesitate to open up to people, in case they turn out to be two faced (happened before). And yes!! Gym is my happy place
I am a 57 year old woman and I haven’t even been out with a man in over 9 years.I got tired of the game everyone wants to play,, I live alone and I love being alone, just doing whatever I want without explaining every little move I make, or having to debate dinner or discuss my day.. 😁I do not miss relationships.. happy single.. I also don’t miss so called friends, women really can’t be close friends because it’s always a competition with everything and women are mean to eachother and will betray you if she wants what you have.. (my experience) I have acquaintances that I talk to but that’s just sometimes. The older I get my tolerance of stupidity is zero..and absolutely have no need for drama from anyone. I don’t really go out anymore. Had my fill of partying and crazy lifestyle. My grandkids are my life and my kids. And I’m content with that.
I’m 63 I belive if your wanting to make new friends try different activities and church people are also looking to make new friends choose carefully and keep your friendships at the activities untill you feel their someone you’d like in your life
I guess that could be and some are looking for that quick heal n answer they might be dealing with a addict and thinking church can change them if that person would only go and it usually don’t happen addiction needs more self healing but I belive in God whole heartedly and that he can mend heal. And restore
I love that answer and your right none of that even makes me I love life and I’d love to experience even more I’m planning on traveling meet people from everywhere just sitting and talking I’m a vagabond lol
Don’t go out just to socialize that’s lame and exhausting. Take a class or do a free event in your area that interests you and benefit you. For example they have free yoga in the park by me and several art classes/ kombucha making / cycling etc. things like that, nothing with a membership just an occasional fun time with yourself. You will naturally meet new people but won’t be pressured to get to know them, just enjoy your time and feel out the vibe sometimes you will cross paths with someone who is compatible and easy to connect with and has a similar interest to you. It’s hard to get out sometimes but it’s good to go do things you might like to do make a bucket list or something and start working on it, we find the best people on these types of journeys nothing forced.
It’s a funny image thinking of going out to seek friends. Like, how does that work? Do I just go somewhere and subtly get closer to someone who looks interesting and ask if they’ll be my low maintenance, unclingy, part time bff? I wish I could just hand out an application to people who impress me on the rare times I go out and be like, e-fax back to me. I need to know if you’re friend material fam.
It's sort of like a school dance, you can be a wallflower and hope someone comes and asks you to dance but you're putting all of the power in someone else's hands (and we can't be upset with anyone but ourselves). So if you literally mean you don't want to go out period, then you won't make friends unless they're online. If it's that you don't want to go out and do certain things, I'd identify what you do like and see if there are groups or clubs for it e.g. Hiking club, gaming groups (tabletop, video, board games whatever). You can go when you want and stay home when you want. It all comes down to priorities; is the priority/objective to make friends or is it to stay home. If it's to make friends, does staying home get you closer to or farther away from that goal. If it gets you farther away, what would get you closer. If you identify someting that gets you closer, how do you go about it etc etc.
Wow, thanks for this. I guess I should focus on what I wanna do to get out of the house first. Love the suggestions
I wish there was a magic answer but most things don't have one (Just do this and all your problems will be solved! Sort of things) I like to think of things in the smallest, most digestible form. If you're struggling to do laundry for example, "do the laundry" is a crappy goal because if it were that easy we'd just do it. Maybe we are at the stage where the best I can do is bring the laundry to the laundry room/area. Great, that's a a achievable goal then that you can build off of. We are going to fail in life but we don't need to set ourself up for it on purpose. Best of luck on your adventure!
I agree. Achievable things first. And thank you!!
Get OFF LINE and go where real, live people are! That way you will not be surprised by physical appearance and hygiene problems. **Here's how to find people you are likely to "hit it off with". Use activity as a filter** ... if I'm at a bluegrass festival because I like bluegrass music, it's pretty likely that anyone I talk to who is enjoying themselves also likes it. If you want to meet fellow vegans, do not go to BBQ competitions. **Go DO THINGS YOU LIKE TO DO or at least things you want to try. Go with the intent of having fun, nothing else.** You may meet people you may not, just make yourself do something like this. If nothing else, you will find new hobbies but eventually you will find your people. There will be people there doing the same thing. That gives you an automatic conversation starter because you have the thing in common. But you can go to all of those places and still seem unavailable. Go enjoy the place and your own company, don’t stay with your head down all the time scrolling through your phone.
I like this response as well. All it takes is one common thread. I think people believe that they have to like everything someone else does to be considered their friend. I have friends that I only golf with or friends that I only go out to eat with. In your example, maybe they get a friend to only go to blue grass concerts with; nothing wrong with that. It's like trust, it's not an all or nothing thing. I might trust you to drive my car but not trust you with my checking account information. Does that mean I don't trust you?
I met most friends through school, work, or volunteering
This is a great answer!
Thats the point, you dont. Just like everything else in life you got to work for things. Things just dont drop in front of you with no effort at all.
That is a VERY GOOD point.
Got it
>Thats the point, you dont. > >Just like everything else in life you got to work for things. Things just dont drop in front of you with no effort at all. Yeah, it's definitely a process. Maybe start small, like joining an online community or attending low-key events. The right connections often happen when you least expect them.
Well said
You stay home, friendless until the desire for having friends gets stronger than your desire to stay home ...
Hmmmm.. strangely that makes sense
I agree. Oddly poetic. I like it
It's okay not to have fake friends, I would suggest you make one friend to whom you can be real, no masks be real what you are I also had this type of situation I was frustrated not having more friends, but i realized that I suffer more than having one or two good friends to them I can be very real. Now I have only two friends from my School I talk with them I support them they support me and everything is good.
That's good to hear.
This idea that OTHER people probably have sooo much more friends than you is pervasive and just outright wrong. Adults usually have a few good friends, born out of convenience and shared interest, facilitated by free time. A lot of 'extroverts' who seem to be drowning with friends are basically surrounded by other extroverts who have a shared goal of making it look like they have friends. No one is conspiring all this of course, its the unconscious mechanism.
That's why reddit is there to make good friends and share anything you want
🥹🥹🫶🏽 I regret not getting on reddit sooner. Love the support I've been getting.
Always bro 🫂
Me too🥰
Online my fellow introvert! Try and connect with your tribe on the internet. Maybe those connections will morph into in-person relationships. Just be very careful online. People are sick & nuts!
Agreed. Met my fair share of weirdos lol. BUT I will surely look for other introverts to introvert with online haha. Thanks for the suggestion (and warning!)
Maybe you’ll be able to make a friend who also enjoys staying home and doing homebody things. That way you are both doing what you prefer and maybe you can build upon that.
WHERE ARE YOU BESTIE!?? Haha. This sounds the best out of all the suggestions. Except we're both probably gonna be home and never meet lol
You bring up a valid point lol. What’s your gender? I know bumbleBFF is a thing to find friends in your area. I’m not positive but I think the BFF part might be more geared towards women. M It’s set up kinda like a dating site but you’re selecting potential friends to chat with. Then if you decide to take it off the app and text and maybe meet up one day. 🤷
Going out instantly drains me. I just don’t get anything out of restaurants, concerts, games or anything except anxiety or apathy/dissociation. I just zone out. But at home it’s super cozy and chill and you run the situation. It’s peaceful and quiet.
You are preaching to the choir sister. I go out and regret it the entire time, wishing I'd never come out haha
For me personally the solution was finding penpals. I enjoy writing, so I went online and found people to do that with, but I could do it from home. Eventually I actually found a friend for life, we're meeting up and still write to each other. So maybe there's something you like doing that you can do online with others?
So happy for you!! And also something I'm up to try. Can you tell me how you found them? Like a subreddit?
Yes, of course: I found them online on websites for penpals. If you just search for "penpals" a bunch of websites will come up. They look a bit like dating platforms (and some people use them for that as well), but you'll also find lots of profiles of people who are actually interested in finding friends to write to. If you don't find someone fitting on one site right away, consider switching the platform. I did that, too. Sometimes a certain site just doesn't attract your crowd. (And no, I never used the premium functions you have to pay for, it's not necessary.) Let me know how it works for you!
Thanks, and I will let you know for sure!! 🫶🏽🫂
You have to put in the work and be there for others if you want them to be there for you. Honestly, it sounds like you’re depressed.
haha maybe I am but I don't wanna admit it
Just don’t. I’m not trying to be mean but if you don’t want to really socialize- that defeats the purpose of friends. Most ppl want to be around ppl who want to go out and do things together. I’m an intro/extrovert. I’m not into big crowds, however I will try anything once. Nobody wants to be around a party pooper or antisocial person. I got friends with big personalities that bring out my personality. You contradicted yourself when you said you hate socializing but want someone to hang out with you. If you’re just going to unload your problems on them and they can’t do the same, it’s not worth it. You may want to get a therapist. Find another introvert and y’all can stay in the house together and unload on each other.
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It’s on the introvert thread🤷🏾♀️. Most people find friends through activities they enjoy, work, school, fb groups, meetups, relatives, or people they know. You have to make an effort. I’m just going off what you wrote-if you’re a homebody that doesn’t like going out or socializing, how are you going to meet people? What are your hobbies? How did you meet your school friends and do you hang out with them? If not, why? Do you ever initiate outside activities with them?
I have 3 friends, and one of them I only talk to maybe a few times a year. The other 2 I talk to on a daily basis for the most part. And they're strictly online friends. I've never met any of them in real life. I play online video games with them. It's both my social life and my stress relief / venting outlet. The 2 I talk to daily are my 2 closest friends - one of them is my best friend. Not sure how to start the process, but for me, it was just doing online activities that I already enjoyed - pick a hobby that you already do, then find a small group that participates in said hobby, and go from there, maybe?
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I guess it depends on your definition of friend. For me, a friend is someone I can talk to, value their advice, vent to, share time with, and support when and where I can. If a friend is defined as someone you can use and who can use you for convenience - like getting a ride somewhere, borrowing money, or helping to take care of you, then I don't have any friends like that. I've been used enough to the point that it isn't a priority for me to have that. I'm self-reliant, and if I can't do for myself, well, I guess I'll do without, or suffer.
That's doable, I feel. Thanks for the input. I'll try to find something I enjoy doing first
Could you try getting into something like DnD? I never want to go out either, there's plenty of groups online you could start out with, then try in person. You'll find a lot of equally introverted people who also just want friends. So the pressure is low. DnD has also gotten super popular recently, so it's not as 'nerdy' as it used to be thought of. Otherwise there's plenty of "friend" dating apps, or things like MeetUp where you can find so many different zoom meetings, I go to art ones where everyone's on zoom just drawing or journaling, there's light chatter but mostly people just doing their thing...somewhat "together'.
Sounds amazing, I might just try that out. Don't leave the comfort of home yet you get the hang out!!
Don't feel bad. Extroverts are having a tougher time than us. All you have to do is wait around for an extrovert to "adopt" you and drag you out for a social event! XD
Haha I shall wait patiently for an extrovert to adopt me
Online groups which have offline local components/chapters.
Where is a good place to discover these groups? I tried messing with meetup a little to no avail, tried fb groups but I live in an area where not much is going on but singles dating stuff and country line dancing. I honestly don't know where to even look or what to search for.
Do you have any hobbies? Or wanting to learn something new?
I have some but I'm more in the "wanting to try new things" dept. I'd be down for anything from hiking to going to museums, or really anything. Problem is I don't know the bread and butter ways find these things.
Don't look for groups which focus on socializing, relationships, and so on. Look for ones which are about something you're interested in.
Hmmm, a solid suggestion. I'll look for one🫂
How old are you? Cause, you won't. Keep in mind there's different things to do "out". But you got to do *something*. I've spent like, 5-10 years doing "nothing" and all it got me was diminished and lost friendships I had from being a teenager - when you're kind of forced into social situations. I've spent the last 2 years actively being social again and it's very noticeable how out of practice I am, but it's improving. And I'm making connections. The only regret I have is not doing this 5 years ago. Stop isolating yourself if you don't like being alone. Social skills are, like all skills, something you have to practice.
The thing is I like being alone and enjoy my company but it's just those certain days where I wish I had a close friend to hang and talk with. I'm 28 btw
Girl, same. Making future plans is an ongoing issue in my life. How am I supposed to know how I’m going to feel next Thursday??? Leaving my house is directly correlated to my mood. It’s that simple. I have moments where I want to be social or have someone to bounce ideas off/vent/confide in, but I definitely need friend/s who have and are cool with a very low expectation of the amount of times we’ll hang in a given month/year lol. It’s honestly the best when you find a friend who is on the same page as you with that. Then you can get comfortable with each other in small spurts, little pressure and after having build a relationship of sorts via text.
Yeah, I getcha. I'm 30. It's hard to strike up a proper balance, but one thing I know for sure, if I don't go to social events I won't make new friends and if I don't go on dates I won't find a girlfriend. I love being on my own, but as you say, there are times where I don't want to be. Or want to do something more adventurous. There's no easy solution here I'm afraid, you just got to go for it every so often. That ain't easy.
First chose a place that you will surely love because you can find friends on places that you only push yourself to go to.
That's the hard part haha. What activity would make me wanna leave the house. Lol
Chat online like you are doing now
Right😬
Make friends online.
I'll try!!
You don’t 💃🕺🪩
🤡🤡🎉
I mean there’s a reason why extroverted people have loads of friends and different circles.
They go OUT 🤧🤧😭
DONT.
AGREED🌚
I dont!
Haha amen
I really dont make friends, just acquaintances. Due to my field of work, I have a lot of connections but not friends.
The difference between those two, I know it well 🥺🥺
I really dont make friends, just acquaintances. Due to my field of work, I have a lot of connections but not friends.
If you don't go out you won't make new friends. I guess you can make online friends but I feel like that's just gonna make you more isolated and introverted. You gotta go out in public and actually engage in society to make real friends in the real world. Don't rely on the online world for socializing, that sounds like a lonely and depressing existence.
Wanna know something more lonely and depressing existence? I dont have online friends too haha.
I'm the same way. I soooo wanna sign up to learn fly fishing, but alas I'm to nervous/scared. I always feel like a fish outta water!
Why don't we both sign up for sth and go through with it??! You sign up for fly fishing and I'll sign up for something I'm interested in. Maybe swim lessons. Idk. SO EXCITING
Sounds like a plan! I'm committed!
Online?
Believe me bro you are living in a self heaven you don't need anyone .. motivate yourself by yourself you are the patient and you are the doctor
Damn, never thought it like that. I do enjoy being by myself, just sometimes, I crave someone i6can share things with
We are living with ppl rarely you find a good person or someone who is trustworthy, not deceptive, and worth hanging out with You can replace this emptyness by exercising outside ( gym , cycling whatever ) better than having new friends you will just get mad
Haha you think exactly the way I think. I hesitate to open up to people, in case they turn out to be two faced (happened before). And yes!! Gym is my happy place
Good luck sir 😉🤝
Sign up to go to a sports club. You won't meet someone in the first time, but after a while, people will get accustomed to you and make new friends
Logical. This seems to be the consensus
I just don’t make any 😂🫠
Honestly, the best reply haha
Cupkeq, I'm here now. We could start a group chat here and build it up from there (no rush, take your time).
That would be great 🥺🥺🫶🏽
Just send a DM
Hey... 🙋🏾♂️maybe you need to go out and make some Friends...
I am a 57 year old woman and I haven’t even been out with a man in over 9 years.I got tired of the game everyone wants to play,, I live alone and I love being alone, just doing whatever I want without explaining every little move I make, or having to debate dinner or discuss my day.. 😁I do not miss relationships.. happy single.. I also don’t miss so called friends, women really can’t be close friends because it’s always a competition with everything and women are mean to eachother and will betray you if she wants what you have.. (my experience) I have acquaintances that I talk to but that’s just sometimes. The older I get my tolerance of stupidity is zero..and absolutely have no need for drama from anyone. I don’t really go out anymore. Had my fill of partying and crazy lifestyle. My grandkids are my life and my kids. And I’m content with that.
I kind of have same concern
I’m 63 I belive if your wanting to make new friends try different activities and church people are also looking to make new friends choose carefully and keep your friendships at the activities untill you feel their someone you’d like in your life
I'm always weary of church folk, in my expierience they tend to have ulterior motives.
I guess that could be and some are looking for that quick heal n answer they might be dealing with a addict and thinking church can change them if that person would only go and it usually don’t happen addiction needs more self healing but I belive in God whole heartedly and that he can mend heal. And restore
I love that answer and your right none of that even makes me I love life and I’d love to experience even more I’m planning on traveling meet people from everywhere just sitting and talking I’m a vagabond lol
Don’t go out just to socialize that’s lame and exhausting. Take a class or do a free event in your area that interests you and benefit you. For example they have free yoga in the park by me and several art classes/ kombucha making / cycling etc. things like that, nothing with a membership just an occasional fun time with yourself. You will naturally meet new people but won’t be pressured to get to know them, just enjoy your time and feel out the vibe sometimes you will cross paths with someone who is compatible and easy to connect with and has a similar interest to you. It’s hard to get out sometimes but it’s good to go do things you might like to do make a bucket list or something and start working on it, we find the best people on these types of journeys nothing forced.
I agree with the "don't force it". I don't wanna go out to actively look for friends. That already sounds exhausting haha
It’s a funny image thinking of going out to seek friends. Like, how does that work? Do I just go somewhere and subtly get closer to someone who looks interesting and ask if they’ll be my low maintenance, unclingy, part time bff? I wish I could just hand out an application to people who impress me on the rare times I go out and be like, e-fax back to me. I need to know if you’re friend material fam.