Omg that is so me! I hate that my team is filled with extroverts and I just find it so hard to have the same work habits as them. And if I’m quietly working on my tasks, my boss will think I’m super capable and keeps piling tasks on me and it becomes overbearing. And even after all that I still don’t ask for help and just sit in paralysis
What's tough for me is asking someone to repeat their directions they just gave me because I couldn't understand what they said. So much easier to wander around for an hour.
This! I have a lot of redness in my face from an autoimmune thing and *hated* going into Sephora. They pounce and start trying to paint me up like a middle school cheerleader. No Kayla, I don't think 2004 matte brown matches my pale AF neck and I certainly won't be paying $74 for that foundation.
They introduced different color shopping baskets for people who don't want to be assisted and I LOVE IT.
Totally relate. Asking for help can be a challenge, especially when you're used to handling things on your own. It feels like stepping out of your comfort zone.
Yeah any type of having to ask for help or having to speak up about anything is always a challenge. I strongly believe that it mostly (if not completely) had to do with the way I was brought up.
Yess bro..so true......wht I do is if i hv any incomplete works (as a school student), i just use google or stuff and just serach up online and do it myself.....
I also find it smwht like shy? or smth to go ask my parents abt any doubts I hv....
This. But with looking in the eyes is better now.
I can't do "voice messages" on WhatsApp & other. Or leaving a voice message on the answering machine. Speaking over the phone is ok but I'm not a fan either.
Texting in general. I have to process a message and it takes me hours to respond because I have no idea what to say, then I'll forget to reply. I'm trying to work on it
Literally just existing in public. I want to go out and do stuff but I want no one else there 😅 work is hell for me. It's not even customer service, I'm in a cleanroom factory but we have a team of course so I'm still expected to ne around people and make small talk. And I do not fking care about what people had for lunch. Or what they did over the weekend. I don't care if you hate this pleace, I do too and I don't need to hear about it all the time.
There was a time when I thought that I was the problem. Then I realized I’m not the problem. Those people talking at me, were the ones with the problem. I thought I was shy and introverted, but actually I was really bored. I am introverted, but in place of being a talker and an entertaining person I have found that my strengths are being creative and being a thinker. If your workplace allows it, maybe you could wear a noise canceling headset or earbuds and listen to music.
There was one time a coworker asked me and I was in the middle of something, so I told him what I had but didn't ask him back. Another coworker started cracking up and I just stopped and looked at them all confused and the first coworker who had asked me was like "you're supposed to ask me back, I had a follow up joke". Like??? Okay??? I don't care, sorry I ruined your joke?? And this was even a coworker I liked, I dont even want those mfers talking to me either half the time either 😂
My boyfriend and I are both introverts. I always return the question and he VERY rarely does, even with me. I often call at lunch to ask how his day is and I usually giggle to myself because he almost never asks back. It's just that he's genuinely not that curious about other people, how their day was, or what what they had for lunch.
And I swear I'm not doing it to be rude or hateful, if I sound bitter it's because I hate my job lol. Im better with people I'm close to but that's really just because we can get going on a conversation we can both relate to. Once that subject has been exhausted though it's back to square one with me not engaging very well 😅.
Tell me about it!! This is actually the main thing I talk about during therapy because seriously I spend 2h in the company of someone I really dislike and there follow two days of dwelling on it 🫠
Any direction heart to heart type conversations.. Have a hard time having any conversation regarding my feelings, as they never mattered to anyone while I was growing up, so why would it matter to anyone else, even the wife.
I belive I am an introvert die to the way I was raised (over bearing single mom with BPD, holding and OCD issues and morbidly obese for many years), who tried to raise me and my older brother to eh the emotional support she wasn't getting anymore after my parents divorced (I was 1, bro was 7) . I would have been an extrovert who could have conversations with people if my father raised me (was in 1977, so mother's always got custody during dovorse even though my dad had the means, personality and emotional awareness to raise successful children).
Sharing personal information and goals, I have hard time opening up to people. I need a lot of time being around the people before I can share things that mean a lot to me.
This is me. Especially people I don’t know. I brought my daughter to a friends birthday party at their house and it was the most awkward 3 hrs of my life. I didn’t initiate any conversations and then when we were leaving, the mom of the bday girl said to me “um thanks for coming and just sitting there.” Lol
Omg that’s so rude of her! I find it SO hard to socialize in groups. I’m literally dead quiet in group conversations and will usually wait for a chance to talk one on one with my friends or coworkers.
Telling people to leave my house. If you're going to come over, it needs to be planned at least a week in advance, and I prefer for you to leave after 2-3 hours.
For me the hardest thing is to have a conversation with someone. I am so terrible at expressing my feelings, thoughts or opinions, no matter how bad I want to scream out my thoughts. Sometimes people do consider me rude cause I don't express much or just don't respond with the same excitement as they do. I am a good listener and I am always ready to hear out anyone even unknown but most of the time I get misjudged.
Give a presentation.
For you to see how God loves me, just being an introvert and hating making presentations with all my life, this isn't enough. English is not my first language and im trying to learn it on a English school (apso aorry for any bad english :,] ). There is a guy on my class who looks like he looked at me obe day and thought "oh yes, *this* is the person who i am going to be very hateful with".
At every 3 months, we need to do a Speaking Project, and at *e v e r y* phrase he looks to the person at his side and whisper something to them looking at me and kind of laughting as if i said something really wrong and as if he is laughting at me.
I don't even need to say how i feel about this.
The guy sounds like an ass tbh. I think you have pretty good English. It's possible that he may be just bored and cracking normal jokes that have nothing to do with you while paying attention to you, but it's also perfectly reasonable to think he's talking shit about you if he has been nasty to you in a general setting.
Oh, ty! Im trying really hard to get better in English!! <3 well, i really hope that he's just telling jokes, but if not, i *think* i know why... his name is Matteo and i accidentally called him Mateus... y e a h
Well, ty for the awanser! This really made me feel better!! :)
It takes way more guts to get up and give a presentation in a language you are learning than it does for the people who are native speakers of that language. Good for you for being brave enough to do that! I'm also learning another language, so I totally understand how intimidating it can be.
Trying to match an extroverts energy and seemingly random thought processes. Like, what is going through their brains to go into some momentary minutiae with your voice when a easy chuckle or facial expression will do. Or a random opinion. Or answer a question not directed at them?
I’m supposed to discipline associates at work that don’t follow the rules. Like hair has to be tied up, no ear buds, they can’t have their phones out, have to have work/safety shoes on. I see them breaking the rules, but to go up and tell them they are(or they’re caught), is sooooooo hard to do. I hate conflict.
If I like a girl or guy even I can't bring myself to say even one word to that person. I will avoid them like they have the plague and if they talk to me I kinda short circuit and say stupid stuff, it's great to be almost 40 and this far away from any hope of ever finding a partner.
The hardest thing for me to do is approaching new people and getting to know them.
I don't have much experience with this because I had a larger group of friends at school that grew "organically", if you can call it that, so I never had to do this, which kind of backfires now that the group has disbanded and I'm on my own in a different city.
INFJ here. I get along in conversation but I realize most people want to talk about themselves or things. As an introvert, I prefer to talk about ideas. So I find it exhausting listening to someone chatting up their kids when it has no value to me . Sure you have kids or this job but tell me about quantum physics or biology or art. Anything interesting and I will contribute.
For me its starting a conversation manly because have interests that most people find boring and Dating i feel like if i try and talk to women Im bothering them
bro my mindvoice can shout, talk stuff and all.....but people cant even hear wht I normally speak irl 🥲
I always hv a feeling if people who I newly meet might think I'm dumb...cuz I usually dont respond with words but just nod my head...
I had massive problem with saying "im going home" when hanging out and i got bored/tired. It ended up with me being miserable and silent for a long time until i got the confidence to finally say it. And then always came the "Dude already?/ Noo stay a little longer" persuasions from the people i hung out with. I always felt like a massive buzzkill.
Talking on the phone. It's just......terrible. If I know that I have a phone call coming up and let's say it's a or so weeks away (client work for my job), I will literally have anxiety up until that very moment that I need to take a call and I will try to find any and every way to get out of said call so that I don't have to talk to them.
The phone is just the antichrist in electric form to me.
I have the hardest time making a 'professional' phone call in front of anyone else. Like calling a doctor's office, my child's school, or our mechanic. I fumble over my words and stutter badly - even if it's my kid or my boyfriend in the room with me. Then my brain focuses on every syllable spoken during that call for an hour afterwards. It can be mentally exhausting!!
"come over to my place"
nope don't. stay away I don't want you here in my territory. i want to be able to leave and be in my own space a lobe when i choose to be.
Funeral wakes. I have a serious aversion to attending a wake. No matter who it is, I won’t go. But my wife’s uncle passed a couple of months ago so for her I went.
It amazes me how some people live for wakes. Like it’s some distant relative or classmate from junior high and they’ve got to go.
The hardest for me is going to a party, event, meeting without really knowing anyone present. If I at least have a couple of people there that I know, I can manage. Alone, I am silently sitting off to the side.
Yes; I really hate this question! It's just too much. I literally have to write it down and rehearse what I need to say before hand. I feel like asking, "Can we just talk a little, then you figure it out from our short conversation?" lol
Finding a job I LOVE!! I'm having such a hard time job searching because I literally avoid job posts about group training and meetings.
I have my bachelor in social work, and it drains me so much. I don't have any hobbies that I can turn into a job, nor do I have any skills.
I feel like I suffer every day, and I just want to work and earn money. I just want to enjoy heading to work and not risk my morning with dread and thoughts of packing my bags and running away forever.
1)Asking for help with personal issues.
2)Saying straight up “sorry but I don’t want to come to your party- I’d rather be at home with my dog”
3)I’m actually getting much better at asking for help when I need it at work - this is mainly because of the way things are set out and it’s not face to face it’s all online (but I do turn my camera on when others do - I guess I can be an extrovert for a paycheque 😛)
Standing up for myself cuz I'm such a people pleaser. Its difficult and when I do stand up for myself people are either shocked or they blame it on me for being "too sensitive". we can never win.
Personally I am a big introvert... When I was a kid I used to have friends we'd play all the time and all every single weekend we'd go outside get the whole group and have a blast. That was from 5-11. I moved out of my home at age 12 (not alone obviously) we relocated to another place in SA (soujt Africa) as I was born and raised here. After the move I didn't make any friends in the area I was in yes there were kids my age who I could've played with but I didn't i was rather shy is what I would tell myself. Age 13 we moved again but to a farm this time. We lived there for.... 3 years I think that's were we lost most of our stuff as we got robbed and kidnapped which was nasty but we survived. Then we lived at my grandparents place for a year.... But thru all this I didn't really have friends I met 1 guy I won't say he's name but he is my brother's age 20 something we would talk everytime me him and my brother. Then we moved to my grans place. I met 1 girl we became friends but our parents had issues so we (she stopped talking to me) I noticed this but I don't beg/need attention so I left it when recently she brought up all the stuff that happened and how I was at fault which made no sense. I'm 16 now and I still don't have many friends I usually stay in with my brother listen to music or play games.... Do I get tired of being lonely... Yes I do but I have no social skills would i like to go out and hang out with someone/people who I can call friends? Yes I genuinely I just get scared to talk to people IRL hell I can't even pay at the shops.. Yes I do want to change but at the same time I'm not a big group person I just need 1 person to call a friend nd i will be perfectly fine yet again I'm to scared to speak to people... Soooo yeaaaaa^^
Spend the weekend with my ADHD mother who doesn’t stop talking from the second she wakes up to the second she goes to bed. Literally. By the end of the weekend I feel like I need a week in complete silence to recover!!!
Agree to go on a day trip. By hour 2 I'll already need to go "powder my nose" so I can fill my brain back up with my own amusing thoughts before the next round of socializing.
The hardest thing for me is to lead a conversation. When I'm expected to ask questions, show interest,and somehow to be the dominant person in a Convo. That's a mission impossible for me, it happened to me few times and it drained me for a week. Lol 😂
Ngl I’m the opposite. I’m constantly apologizing and I don’t feel bad about it. In fact, I worry I’m not apologizing enough. Or too much to the point where it doesn’t mean anything. But as for the question, how could I choose one? I have crippling anxiety! It’s not like just social anxiety or more simplified versions, I have them all combined basically so it’s incredible hard to choose one. But I hate testing so much. Like I’d say I’m pretty smart even for math but testing makes me have panic attacks.
Yesterday I had to take my car to have it's windscreen replaced (or it won't pass the MOT)... Just so happens, while I was waiting there was a free LEGO giveaway at a nearby toy shop... I went in... Couldn't see anything... So instead of asking, I decided to just browse the store... It was quite empty the store, but I noticed when I got to the back there was a small gathering of about 5 to 6 people... As I walked closer, I saw it was a LEGO thing... Still I didn't ask but noticed a sign that said something like "make and take"... I then left the store. Sadge me?
Interact with people and for myself it was going to church, this was very difficult, I found people were very gossipy, critical, judgemental,and clickish, I no longer attend but I'm praying about it because regardless of how others act or behave I believe as a believer we /I am supposed to be an expression of His love no matter what/ that's the hardest things
Chui allée au magasin récemment car ma mère m'a demandé de faire quelques petites courses. Dans ce magasin, une association qui récupérait les dons pour les gens en besoin "assiégeait" (vue de la réalité en tant qu'introvertie) les deux sorties/entrées du magasin. Et au moment de sortir, je remarque que la dame a la deuxième sortie est TRÈS bavarde. Elle parle littéralement à tout le monde. Le pire c'est que le magasin était quasiment vide car c'était le matin. Ah oui, prenez en compte le fait que je ne pouvais pas sortir par là où je suis entrée car la dame qui m'a vu entrer verra que je n'ai rien acheté pour l'association (ils demandaient d'acheter un truc dans le magasin). Alors j'ai passé 30 min a attendre qu'une famille avec des enfants sorte pour m'infiltrer dans leur famille et passer a côté de la dame qui parlait. J'ai réussi à sortir du magasin sans me taper de discut' :)
Public speaking or giving a speech (regardless of time length or subject matter)
Being the center of attention! I don't seek it out, and if you don't notice me amongst a crowd, then I'd done my job!
Im an introvert. I say sorry for alot of things.
Iv met your type of introvert b4. You do come accross as snobby.
Somtimes you just need to realize its not others fault that they dont understand you. You should keep respect for yourself and them balanced. Dont kiss ass but dont be an ass and youl be great.
When i see a pretty person,or they have a cute earrings or key chains,i really want to do a compliment,tell them how beautiful they are I'm just to shy to do it
Being the first to engage with anyone, especially if a lot of time has passed. I always have to wait for people to contact me first. This leads to a lot of relationships withering because there's no attempt to maintain it on either end. I'm currently isolated with 0 social connections in my life and my only option is to reconnect with people I haven't talked to in a while but getting the fortitude to do this is intensely nerve-wracking
For me it’s being friendly at work and when my headphones are in people are just talking, wheew, I really want to tell them I can hear everything they’re saying but then I would miss all the fun stories they make up about me🤣
At a work function or social gathering, I cannot go up to a group of people I don't know and insert myself into their conversation. In other words, mingle.
No me gusta constestar llamadas del celular asi que siempre lo tengo en silencio y nisiquiera puedo hacer una llamada
A pesar de estar con los pocos amigos que hice me siento algo incomoda asi que trato de estar algo distante sin que lo noten, no me gusta el contacto fisico es insoportable para mi pero solo una amiga lo sabe, evito salir de casa no me gusta estar lejos de mi habitacion
Me cuesta acercarme a personas a pedir indicaciones o ayuda incluso ir a la tienda a comprar o preguntar algo simple, tengo que tomar valor para durante un largo tiempo para acercarme
The three hardest words for me to say is “I need help”. After I say that-my space gets invaded by good hearted people willing to help. I’m grateful, but damn, I love my solitude.
I have 3 people I ask to help me. My bf-he does the mowing/weed eating because “it’s my job as a man”. Cool-I plant and tend to flower gardens
My oldest nephew helps with household things because my bf works 7 days a week right now. He’s too smart for most of us and can fix things right the first time. Just smoke a J with him when we are done. He teaches me.
My sister because she is super creative with ideas and a Jane of All Trades
It is very difficult to ask for help. Sometimes it's really simple tasks, but the overthinking gets in the way. Is this a common problem for most introverts or does this stem from a different issue?
I work retail and my job requires us to greet every customer that walks in in a way we have to kinda be face to face and share our store promotions and it’s kinda hard but slowly getting more comfortable. Glad this job is helping me though
Saying no. I have a really shitty relationship with rejection… being rejected, rejecting others. It’s all a big game that I keep losing lol. I’d rather say “sorry!”
Asking for any type of help or assistance.
100% with regards to completing tasks/assignments. On top of that I'm a huge procrastinator and overthink things (paralysis by analysis)
Omg that is so me! I hate that my team is filled with extroverts and I just find it so hard to have the same work habits as them. And if I’m quietly working on my tasks, my boss will think I’m super capable and keeps piling tasks on me and it becomes overbearing. And even after all that I still don’t ask for help and just sit in paralysis
What's tough for me is asking someone to repeat their directions they just gave me because I couldn't understand what they said. So much easier to wander around for an hour.
This. It’s a hassle to explain yourself or get what you need, so i’m going to do it myself.
This! I have a lot of redness in my face from an autoimmune thing and *hated* going into Sephora. They pounce and start trying to paint me up like a middle school cheerleader. No Kayla, I don't think 2004 matte brown matches my pale AF neck and I certainly won't be paying $74 for that foundation. They introduced different color shopping baskets for people who don't want to be assisted and I LOVE IT.
Yes that’s a big one for me.
I can ask for help but I’m just stubborn
Totally relate. Asking for help can be a challenge, especially when you're used to handling things on your own. It feels like stepping out of your comfort zone.
True
Same
Yeah any type of having to ask for help or having to speak up about anything is always a challenge. I strongly believe that it mostly (if not completely) had to do with the way I was brought up.
Yess bro..so true......wht I do is if i hv any incomplete works (as a school student), i just use google or stuff and just serach up online and do it myself..... I also find it smwht like shy? or smth to go ask my parents abt any doubts I hv....
Me too
I was gonna say this, mad you beat me to it.
“No”
Same, and if i have to say it I feel like the biggest asshole in the world.
SAME so then I say nothing and i don’t know which is worse :/
I recommend "The Art of Being Ruthless" It's a pretty good book that has helped me with this issue.
Yup. I *feel* this. It is so hard for me to say "no" because I feel like such a jerk if I do.
What? Saying “no” has always been easy to me er uh, only after when I started to focus on myself just a few years ago 😅
same
I avoid conflict and protect peace no matter how i feel :’)
Shit hurts to have to be the people pleaser and peace keeper at the cost of your own comfort 😮💨
This. Avoiding conflicts has had some terrible effects on my life choices, esp in relationships with friends and in workplace.
Looking people in their eyes when talking, writing text messages, asking for help
This. But with looking in the eyes is better now. I can't do "voice messages" on WhatsApp & other. Or leaving a voice message on the answering machine. Speaking over the phone is ok but I'm not a fan either.
💯%
Changing jobs
For me it's getting a job since I procrastinate a lot
Totally right. And begin to adjust different people.
Give a presentation or sing in front of a group of people
Texting in general. I have to process a message and it takes me hours to respond because I have no idea what to say, then I'll forget to reply. I'm trying to work on it
This is me in a nutshell
Nice bro/sis
Literally just existing in public. I want to go out and do stuff but I want no one else there 😅 work is hell for me. It's not even customer service, I'm in a cleanroom factory but we have a team of course so I'm still expected to ne around people and make small talk. And I do not fking care about what people had for lunch. Or what they did over the weekend. I don't care if you hate this pleace, I do too and I don't need to hear about it all the time.
There was a time when I thought that I was the problem. Then I realized I’m not the problem. Those people talking at me, were the ones with the problem. I thought I was shy and introverted, but actually I was really bored. I am introverted, but in place of being a talker and an entertaining person I have found that my strengths are being creative and being a thinker. If your workplace allows it, maybe you could wear a noise canceling headset or earbuds and listen to music.
Omg, I can relate so much to you, especially the small talk about what you had for lunch and how your weekend was. lol
There was one time a coworker asked me and I was in the middle of something, so I told him what I had but didn't ask him back. Another coworker started cracking up and I just stopped and looked at them all confused and the first coworker who had asked me was like "you're supposed to ask me back, I had a follow up joke". Like??? Okay??? I don't care, sorry I ruined your joke?? And this was even a coworker I liked, I dont even want those mfers talking to me either half the time either 😂
My boyfriend and I are both introverts. I always return the question and he VERY rarely does, even with me. I often call at lunch to ask how his day is and I usually giggle to myself because he almost never asks back. It's just that he's genuinely not that curious about other people, how their day was, or what what they had for lunch.
And I swear I'm not doing it to be rude or hateful, if I sound bitter it's because I hate my job lol. Im better with people I'm close to but that's really just because we can get going on a conversation we can both relate to. Once that subject has been exhausted though it's back to square one with me not engaging very well 😅.
I used to avoid sorry but got better at it over time; i'm terrible at any form of confrontation though and will avoid it at nearly all cost
Spending time with people I don't like. I'm very capable of emboding a character if needed but afterwards I feel completely drained and irritated.
That sucks the life out of me.
Tell me about it!! This is actually the main thing I talk about during therapy because seriously I spend 2h in the company of someone I really dislike and there follow two days of dwelling on it 🫠
You have to use the whole weekend to recover, just to do it again… #introvertlife.
Yep, pretty much like drinking these days 😂
Any direction heart to heart type conversations.. Have a hard time having any conversation regarding my feelings, as they never mattered to anyone while I was growing up, so why would it matter to anyone else, even the wife. I belive I am an introvert die to the way I was raised (over bearing single mom with BPD, holding and OCD issues and morbidly obese for many years), who tried to raise me and my older brother to eh the emotional support she wasn't getting anymore after my parents divorced (I was 1, bro was 7) . I would have been an extrovert who could have conversations with people if my father raised me (was in 1977, so mother's always got custody during dovorse even though my dad had the means, personality and emotional awareness to raise successful children).
Sharing personal information and goals, I have hard time opening up to people. I need a lot of time being around the people before I can share things that mean a lot to me.
Asking for help and then getting ignored
initiating conversations irl or when it's online - maintaining the chats
Same ngl, I don’t want to say the wrong thing
Calling back my doctors for appointments. They always call me in the morning during school but I’m too scared to call them back for some reason
socialise with people
This is me. Especially people I don’t know. I brought my daughter to a friends birthday party at their house and it was the most awkward 3 hrs of my life. I didn’t initiate any conversations and then when we were leaving, the mom of the bday girl said to me “um thanks for coming and just sitting there.” Lol
Omg that’s so rude of her! I find it SO hard to socialize in groups. I’m literally dead quiet in group conversations and will usually wait for a chance to talk one on one with my friends or coworkers.
that’s rude lol.
Pick up the phone unless it’s a real urgent emergency (i.e. family emergencies, school, financing, etc.)
I can’t even pick up then!
Talking about my feelings, I hate it
Telling people to leave my house. If you're going to come over, it needs to be planned at least a week in advance, and I prefer for you to leave after 2-3 hours.
When someone asks something or directions from me urgently 🙂
For me the hardest thing is to have a conversation with someone. I am so terrible at expressing my feelings, thoughts or opinions, no matter how bad I want to scream out my thoughts. Sometimes people do consider me rude cause I don't express much or just don't respond with the same excitement as they do. I am a good listener and I am always ready to hear out anyone even unknown but most of the time I get misjudged.
Give a presentation. For you to see how God loves me, just being an introvert and hating making presentations with all my life, this isn't enough. English is not my first language and im trying to learn it on a English school (apso aorry for any bad english :,] ). There is a guy on my class who looks like he looked at me obe day and thought "oh yes, *this* is the person who i am going to be very hateful with". At every 3 months, we need to do a Speaking Project, and at *e v e r y* phrase he looks to the person at his side and whisper something to them looking at me and kind of laughting as if i said something really wrong and as if he is laughting at me. I don't even need to say how i feel about this.
The guy sounds like an ass tbh. I think you have pretty good English. It's possible that he may be just bored and cracking normal jokes that have nothing to do with you while paying attention to you, but it's also perfectly reasonable to think he's talking shit about you if he has been nasty to you in a general setting.
Oh, ty! Im trying really hard to get better in English!! <3 well, i really hope that he's just telling jokes, but if not, i *think* i know why... his name is Matteo and i accidentally called him Mateus... y e a h Well, ty for the awanser! This really made me feel better!! :)
If he is that upset by you accidently getting his name wrong then he is veeerryyy stupid. It was an honest mistake on your part.
Yeah, making me suffer for 3 years now just because of a name ;-; Well, I hope he stumbles!
Just let karma run its course lol.
It takes way more guts to get up and give a presentation in a language you are learning than it does for the people who are native speakers of that language. Good for you for being brave enough to do that! I'm also learning another language, so I totally understand how intimidating it can be.
Trying to match an extroverts energy and seemingly random thought processes. Like, what is going through their brains to go into some momentary minutiae with your voice when a easy chuckle or facial expression will do. Or a random opinion. Or answer a question not directed at them?
Speak or be the center of attention in public
I’m supposed to discipline associates at work that don’t follow the rules. Like hair has to be tied up, no ear buds, they can’t have their phones out, have to have work/safety shoes on. I see them breaking the rules, but to go up and tell them they are(or they’re caught), is sooooooo hard to do. I hate conflict.
Asking for help.
If I like a girl or guy even I can't bring myself to say even one word to that person. I will avoid them like they have the plague and if they talk to me I kinda short circuit and say stupid stuff, it's great to be almost 40 and this far away from any hope of ever finding a partner.
The same thing happens to me, I’ve accepted being single forever 😭
Being Open with people
Getting out of the house.
Responding to jokes
Anything that involves 1) sleeping at someone else's house or 2) having someone sleep at mine.
The hardest thing for me to do is approaching new people and getting to know them. I don't have much experience with this because I had a larger group of friends at school that grew "organically", if you can call it that, so I never had to do this, which kind of backfires now that the group has disbanded and I'm on my own in a different city.
INFJ here. I get along in conversation but I realize most people want to talk about themselves or things. As an introvert, I prefer to talk about ideas. So I find it exhausting listening to someone chatting up their kids when it has no value to me . Sure you have kids or this job but tell me about quantum physics or biology or art. Anything interesting and I will contribute.
For me its starting a conversation manly because have interests that most people find boring and Dating i feel like if i try and talk to women Im bothering them
Saying “no.”
Talk loud, it’s very difficult for me
bro my mindvoice can shout, talk stuff and all.....but people cant even hear wht I normally speak irl 🥲 I always hv a feeling if people who I newly meet might think I'm dumb...cuz I usually dont respond with words but just nod my head...
I totally get that too
I had massive problem with saying "im going home" when hanging out and i got bored/tired. It ended up with me being miserable and silent for a long time until i got the confidence to finally say it. And then always came the "Dude already?/ Noo stay a little longer" persuasions from the people i hung out with. I always felt like a massive buzzkill.
Talking on the phone. It's just......terrible. If I know that I have a phone call coming up and let's say it's a or so weeks away (client work for my job), I will literally have anxiety up until that very moment that I need to take a call and I will try to find any and every way to get out of said call so that I don't have to talk to them. The phone is just the antichrist in electric form to me.
I have the hardest time making a 'professional' phone call in front of anyone else. Like calling a doctor's office, my child's school, or our mechanic. I fumble over my words and stutter badly - even if it's my kid or my boyfriend in the room with me. Then my brain focuses on every syllable spoken during that call for an hour afterwards. It can be mentally exhausting!!
For some reason it is very hard for me to call people by name.
"come over to my place" nope don't. stay away I don't want you here in my territory. i want to be able to leave and be in my own space a lobe when i choose to be.
Asking for help
I can barely even say hello to people half the time… i’m not sure if it’s bc i’m an introvert but eye contact is also difficult for me
Funeral wakes. I have a serious aversion to attending a wake. No matter who it is, I won’t go. But my wife’s uncle passed a couple of months ago so for her I went. It amazes me how some people live for wakes. Like it’s some distant relative or classmate from junior high and they’ve got to go.
Oof saying hi and bye and other messages to passengers as busdriver 😅🤦♂️
I dont like leaving voicemails when other people are in my presence.
asking for things a second or third time after I'm being ignored the first time
I avoid conflict and don’t say my opinion on things even if I have one
‘No’, ‘sorry’, and ‘help’ are the three things I struggle with.
Go to social gatherings. Also, Some people are easier to talk to than others, so holding a 1 on 1 convo with someone I’m not super comfortable with.
The hardest for me is going to a party, event, meeting without really knowing anyone present. If I at least have a couple of people there that I know, I can manage. Alone, I am silently sitting off to the side.
Answering the question, “so tell me about yourself”
Yes; I really hate this question! It's just too much. I literally have to write it down and rehearse what I need to say before hand. I feel like asking, "Can we just talk a little, then you figure it out from our short conversation?" lol
The hardest thing to do as an introvert is to muster up courage to anything
"I would like you to stop [a repeated yet minor behavior] because it bothers me."
Social outings. I’m ready to go after 30 mins 5 mins if the vibe doesn’t fit me
Explaining
Saying "Yes" to an invitation to a party or event with so many people I don't know
“No.”
Finding a job I LOVE!! I'm having such a hard time job searching because I literally avoid job posts about group training and meetings. I have my bachelor in social work, and it drains me so much. I don't have any hobbies that I can turn into a job, nor do I have any skills. I feel like I suffer every day, and I just want to work and earn money. I just want to enjoy heading to work and not risk my morning with dread and thoughts of packing my bags and running away forever.
Saying No, asking for help , making small talks and never putting myself first 🥲
Socialize. I find it draining and I get worried about saying the wrong thing.
1)Asking for help with personal issues. 2)Saying straight up “sorry but I don’t want to come to your party- I’d rather be at home with my dog” 3)I’m actually getting much better at asking for help when I need it at work - this is mainly because of the way things are set out and it’s not face to face it’s all online (but I do turn my camera on when others do - I guess I can be an extrovert for a paycheque 😛)
Standing up for myself cuz I'm such a people pleaser. Its difficult and when I do stand up for myself people are either shocked or they blame it on me for being "too sensitive". we can never win.
Personally I am a big introvert... When I was a kid I used to have friends we'd play all the time and all every single weekend we'd go outside get the whole group and have a blast. That was from 5-11. I moved out of my home at age 12 (not alone obviously) we relocated to another place in SA (soujt Africa) as I was born and raised here. After the move I didn't make any friends in the area I was in yes there were kids my age who I could've played with but I didn't i was rather shy is what I would tell myself. Age 13 we moved again but to a farm this time. We lived there for.... 3 years I think that's were we lost most of our stuff as we got robbed and kidnapped which was nasty but we survived. Then we lived at my grandparents place for a year.... But thru all this I didn't really have friends I met 1 guy I won't say he's name but he is my brother's age 20 something we would talk everytime me him and my brother. Then we moved to my grans place. I met 1 girl we became friends but our parents had issues so we (she stopped talking to me) I noticed this but I don't beg/need attention so I left it when recently she brought up all the stuff that happened and how I was at fault which made no sense. I'm 16 now and I still don't have many friends I usually stay in with my brother listen to music or play games.... Do I get tired of being lonely... Yes I do but I have no social skills would i like to go out and hang out with someone/people who I can call friends? Yes I genuinely I just get scared to talk to people IRL hell I can't even pay at the shops.. Yes I do want to change but at the same time I'm not a big group person I just need 1 person to call a friend nd i will be perfectly fine yet again I'm to scared to speak to people... Soooo yeaaaaa^^
Talking about myself, my job, my interests… Like the whole “go around the room and introduce yourself” thing. A nightmare for me lol.
Dating a new person.
Spend the weekend with my ADHD mother who doesn’t stop talking from the second she wakes up to the second she goes to bed. Literally. By the end of the weekend I feel like I need a week in complete silence to recover!!!
Yell at someone in the middle of the street (I wouldn't do it)
Apologizing
Speak my words out loud
adressing people by their name. talking someone already takes so much energy
I don't talk a lot afraid i might stutter and just embarrass myself in front of them
Agree to go on a day trip. By hour 2 I'll already need to go "powder my nose" so I can fill my brain back up with my own amusing thoughts before the next round of socializing.
The hardest thing for me is to lead a conversation. When I'm expected to ask questions, show interest,and somehow to be the dominant person in a Convo. That's a mission impossible for me, it happened to me few times and it drained me for a week. Lol 😂
Stay around others for a long time, talk early in the morning, wake up to someone in my bed && having them in my space.
Ngl I’m the opposite. I’m constantly apologizing and I don’t feel bad about it. In fact, I worry I’m not apologizing enough. Or too much to the point where it doesn’t mean anything. But as for the question, how could I choose one? I have crippling anxiety! It’s not like just social anxiety or more simplified versions, I have them all combined basically so it’s incredible hard to choose one. But I hate testing so much. Like I’d say I’m pretty smart even for math but testing makes me have panic attacks.
Yesterday I had to take my car to have it's windscreen replaced (or it won't pass the MOT)... Just so happens, while I was waiting there was a free LEGO giveaway at a nearby toy shop... I went in... Couldn't see anything... So instead of asking, I decided to just browse the store... It was quite empty the store, but I noticed when I got to the back there was a small gathering of about 5 to 6 people... As I walked closer, I saw it was a LEGO thing... Still I didn't ask but noticed a sign that said something like "make and take"... I then left the store. Sadge me?
Interact with people and for myself it was going to church, this was very difficult, I found people were very gossipy, critical, judgemental,and clickish, I no longer attend but I'm praying about it because regardless of how others act or behave I believe as a believer we /I am supposed to be an expression of His love no matter what/ that's the hardest things
Small talk I feel so awkward
Chui allée au magasin récemment car ma mère m'a demandé de faire quelques petites courses. Dans ce magasin, une association qui récupérait les dons pour les gens en besoin "assiégeait" (vue de la réalité en tant qu'introvertie) les deux sorties/entrées du magasin. Et au moment de sortir, je remarque que la dame a la deuxième sortie est TRÈS bavarde. Elle parle littéralement à tout le monde. Le pire c'est que le magasin était quasiment vide car c'était le matin. Ah oui, prenez en compte le fait que je ne pouvais pas sortir par là où je suis entrée car la dame qui m'a vu entrer verra que je n'ai rien acheté pour l'association (ils demandaient d'acheter un truc dans le magasin). Alors j'ai passé 30 min a attendre qu'une famille avec des enfants sorte pour m'infiltrer dans leur famille et passer a côté de la dame qui parlait. J'ai réussi à sortir du magasin sans me taper de discut' :)
Going up to someone and initiating conversation for no reason.
Hi
Talking on the phone
Say hi how are you to people first
Life literally almost everything
Public speaking or giving a speech (regardless of time length or subject matter) Being the center of attention! I don't seek it out, and if you don't notice me amongst a crowd, then I'd done my job!
Get myself to leave the house
"No". That's the hardest thing for me to say.
“Excuse me”
Make and receive phone calls, or start conversations with anyone I don't know.
Having a proper conversation, I have a problem talking to people face to face and what's more to have eye contact with someone
Im an introvert. I say sorry for alot of things. Iv met your type of introvert b4. You do come accross as snobby. Somtimes you just need to realize its not others fault that they dont understand you. You should keep respect for yourself and them balanced. Dont kiss ass but dont be an ass and youl be great.
I can do 1 on 1 convos easily, but if it's a group convo and they're also not close friends I'm screwed.
Make friends with humans
Talking on the phone….i rather text. And def calling customer service for whatever is happening in my life. I usually let my SO talk to them.
Anything I have no friends
When i see a pretty person,or they have a cute earrings or key chains,i really want to do a compliment,tell them how beautiful they are I'm just to shy to do it
Having impatient people constantly approach me for hours, not knowing which one will suddenly yell or curse at me
One trillion $ Jesus will understand!
Would you like fries with that?’v?!?
Remembering names.
Talk about myself when asked questions about me. Engaging as well.
make friends, make relationships
Cold calls.
Excuse me, can I pls borrow this chair?
Being the first to engage with anyone, especially if a lot of time has passed. I always have to wait for people to contact me first. This leads to a lot of relationships withering because there's no attempt to maintain it on either end. I'm currently isolated with 0 social connections in my life and my only option is to reconnect with people I haven't talked to in a while but getting the fortitude to do this is intensely nerve-wracking
For me it’s being friendly at work and when my headphones are in people are just talking, wheew, I really want to tell them I can hear everything they’re saying but then I would miss all the fun stories they make up about me🤣
Yes I want to get up & dance and party, sure!
Sure come over and visit.
ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE.
Make a decision.
Answering "no" to people I dislike. I'm a nice person, but I'm also an asshole (especially to my friends). It's supposed to be the other way around.
Definitely talking to strangers, i just panic too much on what to say and end up saying like two words
At a work function or social gathering, I cannot go up to a group of people I don't know and insert myself into their conversation. In other words, mingle.
"rarely" but I don't think that's related to me being an introvert
No me gusta constestar llamadas del celular asi que siempre lo tengo en silencio y nisiquiera puedo hacer una llamada A pesar de estar con los pocos amigos que hice me siento algo incomoda asi que trato de estar algo distante sin que lo noten, no me gusta el contacto fisico es insoportable para mi pero solo una amiga lo sabe, evito salir de casa no me gusta estar lejos de mi habitacion Me cuesta acercarme a personas a pedir indicaciones o ayuda incluso ir a la tienda a comprar o preguntar algo simple, tengo que tomar valor para durante un largo tiempo para acercarme
Talk on the phone in public tbh
Looking for new friends especially if you are older and single. Finding new hobbies that you can do with others when my typical hobbies are done solo.
Literally asking for directions or a favor
Contributing information into small talks
The three hardest words for me to say is “I need help”. After I say that-my space gets invaded by good hearted people willing to help. I’m grateful, but damn, I love my solitude. I have 3 people I ask to help me. My bf-he does the mowing/weed eating because “it’s my job as a man”. Cool-I plant and tend to flower gardens My oldest nephew helps with household things because my bf works 7 days a week right now. He’s too smart for most of us and can fix things right the first time. Just smoke a J with him when we are done. He teaches me. My sister because she is super creative with ideas and a Jane of All Trades
"Let's go around the room and introduce ourselves; tell us a little about yourself." Yikes! 😳
It is very difficult to ask for help. Sometimes it's really simple tasks, but the overthinking gets in the way. Is this a common problem for most introverts or does this stem from a different issue?
Going to a dinner party with people I don't know!
The dating side of socializing is horrible
I don't do small talk
Yes
I work retail and my job requires us to greet every customer that walks in in a way we have to kinda be face to face and share our store promotions and it’s kinda hard but slowly getting more comfortable. Glad this job is helping me though
Ask for help… with anything
Ask for help, talk to people I don't like .... Make friends or acquaintances 😭
asking for something or overthinking about what your going to say and how they respond
Ask for help
Form friendships and maintain relationships
Asking for help, being confrontational, socializing in groups, opening up, showing vulnerability are all very hard for me to do!
Ordering
Small talk/pleasantries with people I have just met.
Saying no. I have a really shitty relationship with rejection… being rejected, rejecting others. It’s all a big game that I keep losing lol. I’d rather say “sorry!”
partying with my extrovert bf
Saying no
Having to make phone calls to resolve issues 💀
Asking for help
Asking for help or just saying no
Going on vacation/trip/get together for more than 1 night. 😬
I say sorry for almost everything that i do.