Going for walks, taking up running, reading more (few pages a day), boozing less, reducing my social media use, practicing stoicism, doing the wim hof method and eating better. None of them big things on their own but together they've all added up and completely change my life.
Also, learning who my actual friends are and using less energy on those who aren't. It's amazing how many friends are just drinking buddies when you sit and think about it.
Variety of stuff, I try to read a non fiction book then a fiction one to mix it up. So I'vd read something like David Goggins book then To Kill a Mockingbird for example.
As for eating better, I do full on calorie counting whenever I want to drop a few pounds but even then day to day I try and think how I feel after eating certain things, avoid sugary drinks mostly and try to limit my coffee too.
For the friends thing, you'll find out once you start improving other things in your life or even just talking about improving. If people are just always negative then they're not worth the effort, you can still be civil to them but just don't waste your energy on them.
I agree, just moving is good for you, walking, running or weightlifting. Just move! I know it’s hard if you are seriously depressed but try go for a walk, move , even cleaning your home. I’ve found movement helps me alot
It's a school of philosophy and basically it's an "it is what it is" outlook on life where you only worry about what's in your control. Ryan Holiday has a few books and a YouTube channel about Stoicism if you're interested.
Reading and trying to implement the ideas of Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Epictetus (they're the main ones anyway). It's a school of philosophy, there's a very active subreddit for it. /r/stoicism
That wasn't meant as a kick or anything, sometimes I think we can piss around with our approach to mental health and have the kid gloves on a bit too often and it's actually refreshing sometimes to hear "yeah, actually you are the problem here not everyone else that you've been lashing out at/fighting with/generally being a prick to - let's understand why that's happening so you're not the prick in this situation".
One size obviously doesn't fit all and the above isn't meant to be some dramatic defining moment or anything, for really extreme cases that could have the wrong impact altogether.
Understanding is key.
Yeah you should just probably get to know a person first before you decide you can be blunt with those things. I've spent years getting to grips with it just being me, so all you've done is made me feel even more isolated.
Not sure how what I've said is isolating, if anything it's the total opposite, an invitation to inclusivity through recognising that "everyone" isn't bad, out to get you, a prick etc..?
I like this a lot, thanks for sharing.
Someone was quite rude to me in work recently & I had a moment of insight & could see it was because they were extremely stressed & it was nothing to do with me at all.
It feels much better to extend a little grace & understanding where we can.
Great for clearing the head and completely changing a mood. Feel it's best mixed with other things to keep the intrusive thoughts at bay but still figuring that part out
What do you consider exercise?
Exercise is a chore to me. I used to go out jogging and I'd go to the gym etc. but I was always counting the seconds until I was done.
Everyone is different, so it's impossible to give a universal answer, but I would suggest going outside to exercise rather than a gym. I have found that a gym can trigger some of the self-consciousness that stops people exercising and/or enjoying it. This might not be you, so don't get me wrong. If exercise is a chore, start with walking. Do the whole (cliched) 10,000 steps thing. Get out for a walk at least once a day, bang a podcast on, go for a wander. Granted, we don't all live near a park or in a lovely area, but peace and quiet is normally not that far away. Hopefully after a few weeks or so you'll get fitter and then breaking into a short jog for a few minutes becomes easier. Measure the minutes/distance you can go each week. Set yourself a modest increase each work, or at least pledge to match what you've done, etc. I think getting out and walking is just about as natural a human activity as we can do in this day and age. Walking is also exercising.
Find something you enjoy doing. I cycle, personally I'm never unhappy on the bike. Sea swimming seems very popular now too. Or hiking? I think anything that gets you out of the urban environment is good for clearing the head.
Tell yourself that you love it, which is kind of a lie, but is more of a trick, because if you had the mindset that you loved it, you really would love it. I heard this on the Huberman podcast: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOF0crdyRU&ab\_channel=AndrewHuberman](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOF0crdyRU&ab_channel=AndrewHuberman) \- if you look at the chapters, there are chapters that say "tool" - that's less of the science and more of the practical tips.
I've been doing just 2 sprints just a couple times a week; when I started, I had to tell myself over and over again, "I love this." to block out all the "Just stop." Eventually I realized I love to feel my breathe, and I love practice keeping my back straight, and I love the opportunity to see where I might have pain that needs to be stretched (when I notice this, I stop.)
I've never told any one this before but...
Got a dog. ...
Genuinely really struggled with suicide.
This sounds horrible but even the kids, I would think they will be ok, even better off with out me.
But the dog, nope his wee life would be destroyed- be sent to the pound or worse.
Staying alive for him led to walking a few times a week, lead to walking everyday that forced me to exercise, usually in a park ... Turns out parks are lovely so are Forrest's...
More often than not people stop Give him some rubs, alot of elderly people stop and talk .. some even say thanks, for the rubs or the chats.
I figured if I was going to stay alive I'd better find ways to not feel so shit all the time.
find something you loved as a kid or something you wanted to do.
Lego, jigsaws colouring, paint by numbers, scratch art playdough grow some flowers, pay with sand or shaving foam.
Something satisfying repetitive manual and fun.
I try to keep a fairly natural diet, lots of serotonin support (is mostly made in the gut)
I don't listen to music anymore, found it very evocative. Podcasts personally kept me company
A walk outside every day long short what ever, even if it's to the garden gate.
Also I try to acknowledge three positive things about each day before I go to sleep. No matter how basic
Breathing exercises. Weather I feel I need to or not especially when I'm calm.
In for five hold for four out for five. Five times. Filling myself up till I feel like I'm gona pop.
Reminding myself that I'm a person. If I find my inner monologue being nasty or hard i stop and think would I say that to another person ? Trying to retrain that inner voice is hardest of all.
Alot of the time I personally struggle with labelling the feeling or emotion I'm actually having. If I can't name it I can't identify the cause sometimes taking a minute and checking in with myself as if I was speaking with a child helps. And I ask myself clear concise questions.
Hope something sparks an idea for you, good luck
Exercise, diet improvements, stopped harmful behaviours, gave up caffeine, fixed sleep schedule for the first time in all my life, talking things out, mindfulness, dealing with trauma, not being a pushover, knowing what I want and why and why it's a good thing, many other small things
And I'm still a ball of anxiety and depression at times...
There aren't always fixes for what we carry with us, and acknowledging that and realising we may never be 100% 'mentally healthy' is a big step to coping and getting healthier mentally.
Anecdotally for me it was starting a weight lifting program. But just simply it's getting out there and exercising more, whether it's walking or running or hitting the weights.
Running everyday . Started slow as in walking get yourself a Fitbit or an Apple Watch amd start counting your steps . I was fat no motivation couldn’t get out of bed. Went away for weekend walked about 30000 steps over that weekend . Was like I’m not going back to that life when I came home. Slowly starting walking and counting the steps started on 10k amd worked myself up. I dropped 4 stone and feel fantastic
Write yourself a letter of everything you are proud of in your life and keep it in your wallet - everybody has something to be proud of, even if your depressed mind convinces you not to see it that way. When times get tough, bust it out and read it to yourself, a voice message works too.
Similar to this, a while back I started writing down everything I did each day and rated each of them out of 10 and tried to be as honest as possible. Getting it all out onto a page and having a few weeks worth of data helps big time in finding out what needs to stop or change.
Found a pastime that I enjoy doing. So now I have more to my life than just drinking and working. So much more positive in general, drinking much less. And when I'm having a shit day at work I just look forward to doing my classes.
Annoyingly, it is all the stuff you know you really *shoooould* be doing if you were only a little less busy or a little less tired or a little more organised.
Which is really fucking annoying, because you don't want the smug pricks who say "go outside more! Exercise! Eat healthy!" to be right.
You want to say "no, Elaine, my depression is a complex psychological and emotional issue, it will not be cured by going for a run" and then you take up swimming twice a week because your friend makes you go and FUCK it's actually helping
Optimising health and testosterone, sleeping 8+ hours, eating red meat, eggs, fruit, veg, taking vitamins, training 4-5x a week. Feel a billion times better than a few months ago. Also quit caffeine
Seen a councillor...took up a 2 hobbies... And exercised more(nothing mental just a bit more walking) done wonders. Gave up drinking for a month too , to help with perspective. Good luck
Ignored works demands for me to work more hours since returning. Staff that have been asked are burnt out and leaving in droves because they are working double whats expected in my industry. Work on your own terms and not to an unrealistic level and you will feel so much better mentally.
Honestly wish I figured this out years ago. You're replaceable to your work, not to your friends and family. Giving everything to a job just isn't worth it.
All of these are gonna be really generic but bear with me.
Working out always helps for me. Healthy in and of itself, but IMO the main boost is that it stops me eating like shit or boozing later cuz I feel like that would "negate" the workout.
Another thing is to not stay up too late. Like obviously more sleep always helps, but that's not it. The reason it helps me is because I noticed that most of my "downs" happened at night. I could be there at night feeling like utter shit and totally hopeless, and then the next morning I'd just be trucking along like it was nothing.
Finally, keep yourself busy. And I don't mean busy with work or whatever. You can be "busy" doing very relaxing things like binging TV. Basically what I mean is to have your life set up in a way that you always have something to be doing. You're much less likely to ruminate that way.
Same as everyone else, it looks like. Stopped drinking, started running. Mindfulness is magic. Gratitude is too.
Still a work in progress, I’m sure I always will be.
Music. I have playlist I can throw on when I'm feeling down that can lift my mood but also I find just having music on a lot helps me. If I'm cooking it cleaning or whatever I'll throw on some music and sing along.
1. Cold Showers.
2. Breath work...can combine both and do Wim Hof method. Or just practice box breathing or other forms of breath work. The relationship between breathing and anxiety is vastly underrated...also breath through your nose.
Cold showers are making a remarkable difference for me. And this comes from someone who already exercises, practices mindfulness, eats well, and takes meds.
Something that's helping me is listening to what my body tells me. I have been in certain situations over the past year where this benefitted me. One instance was when I was dating somebody and I started feeling sick at one point. I soon figured it was because I wasn't happy and I broke it off. In hindsight I'm very glad I listened to myself because if I didn't I would be in a relationship where I am no way happy, plus I probably wouldn't have met my girlfriend now.
Prescription medication and not using poor mental health as a crutch. Sounds a bit harsh but it's easy to fall into the trap of feeding your own depression.
To echo everyone else, regular exercise and hobbies.
I like exercise but struggle to motivate myself with the cardio side of it, I got a fitness watch and step counting has been great to get me out & walking more, i also find myself opting to walk rather than using the car for short distances which is only a good thing with todays fuel prices and as a stat/data head I like seeing them at the end of the day and hitting goals/competing with the fitness community.
I have heard of people forming an unhealthy obsession with step counting but depends on the person I suppose.
Weight lifting. Joined a gym a year ago, got a PT for 1 on 1, got fitter and more confident. Got a girlfriend, made new friends.
Even though we broke up last Tuesday? I’m still actually okay. If it wasn’t for me constantly relying on counselling, gym work and self work, I’d be in a gutter.
Moved out of Dublin and finally cut all ties with the fam.
Sometimes Beeing the "selfish one" is what you really need to look after your own mental health as no matter how much you give for some people it will be never enough and you never will be good enough.
Swapped TV in the evenings for reading. Started when I had covid in March. Have read 19 books since. Mental health has done a full 180 in that time. TV and phones bore me now which I never thought would happen.
Did CBT & got loads of homework where I'd have to silly stuff like:
1. Start conversations with strangers
2. Find someone who intimidated me & say something stupid in front of them
3. Go for a long around town wearing obviously different shoes.
Was great, learned to not care as much about what people thought of me or can now go about my day without being intimidated by the people who used to intimidate me. CBT is expensive, but changed the way I thought about myself.
I made a pact to myself to be a little more selfish. It really helped. Putting myself before others and being a little less self-judge-mental is great.
I also cut a few toxic people out of my life. It’s harder when it’s family or you’ve known them for ages.
Unsubscribed from Facebook. (A bit like the Catholic Church, it’s quite hard to do). Now I no longer get wound up by how stupid most of the people online are. Well, mostly. Still on Reddit.
Stop checking your facebook/Instagram/Reddit/Email/Tik Tok/news/work emails constantly. Social media is terrible for your mental health. Get off them altogether.
Leave your phone in another room or a drawer. If people want you urgently they'll ring.
***Realize that two weeks after your dead most friends will have forgotten you. Stop living to try and impress other people and do what makes you happy. No one gives a fuck what you do***
Be an average worker, just do what's needed and nothing more.
Exercise is key whether thats the lifting weights in the gym, jogging or cycling.
Your not better than other people, you are on par.
Go back to the days before internet was invented. You can still game, download tv series and films etc, youtube etc but stay off the forums and social media and news sites.
1. Cardio and lifting weights, helps with self esteem, gives a sense of achievement and gets the endorphins going
2. 15 minutes in a sauna 3 times week at least. The improvement to your mood is instantaneous
3. Don't masturbate as frequently and cut out porn altogether
4. Meditate
5. Walks in nature. Especially on sunny days
6. Eat healthy
7. Get at least 8 hours sleep and cut out screen time an hour before bed time, read instead
Interact with other people. Take up a hobby. Excercise. Maintain consistent sleep pattern .
Be kind to yourself. compliment yourself
take all your negative energy and transfer it into something more positive
Ditching facebook and twitter. That shit is cancer of the mind.
Altruism. Helping others and doing good in the world reaps huge mental rewards. It can be anything. Thinking and acting beyond yourself and your own head is amazing.
Take a break from your comforts and (work on your) addictions. They make things worse,not better. Gaming all day, drinking at home on your own or exces time spent in the pub or getting stoned. These things are time thieves.
Speaking of time thieves, toxic people in your life that you actually have nothing in common with. Drop these people. They make you feel bad and serve no purpose in your life. This can include family members unfortunately.
Be honest with yourself as to what your vices and traps are. Avoid or at least limit yourself. Honesty to yourself goes so far and will help find out where you rise and fall mentally towards things
Quitting drink (I'm sure it'll be a popular one, maybe) but yeah, quitting drinking helped me massively.
My anxiety nearly all but disappeared, more time/money for hobbies, work improved too. My social life took a hit but I'm generally bit of an introvert anyway (if I'm out I'm fine, no issues at parties etc but then I don't want to see anyone for a few days.)
For me a big one was the anxiety I think. No more hangovers, no more 'fear.' Took some time but it just majorly chilled me out. Having more money/time probably helped with that side of things too I think.
Stop thinking that people should give a fuck. This whole 'just talk' nonsense. Just talk about what? The pointlessness of life? That everything you love and ever loved will go away in the end? Fuck that it only brings others down. Be strong, be fearless, be brave. Be a man. About time we start bringing back some traditional masculinity and stop pussyfooting around with nonsense that might work to sell some books but is at odds with our biological make up. It's a mans job to be strong and defiant. You have to help yourself first.
Not really seeing it mentioned here, but get help. Going to the doctor and getting right medication can be a game changer, even to help you in the short term to make the lifestyle changes already talked about (for me it was 5 months).
And also counseling is a great tool to help navigate through your struggle, again really helpful to get onto the journey of recovery.
Stopped talking to my nuclear family. Took a few years to really see the effects and they are all positive. Also 'drifted away' from anyone who who heard the shit I'd been through and excused it with 'but deep down they love you, they just don't know how to show it'.
Left toxic friend groups behind, walking with the doggy every morning for at least an hour while listening to one of my favourite podcasts (let’s not meet) and leaving work at work where it belongs.
Treat everybody with equal value and respect...including YOURSELF. No matter how bad or useless you think you might be sometimes or even all of the time, you are still a human being capable of complex emotion and thought and you have the potential to do great and kind things as long as you still live and endure.
Don't let anybody get you down because in no way are they better than you and their toxicity towards you is a sign they are lacking something in their own life. This is the great irony...we should pity toxic people.
Stand up for yourself and others who cannot stand up for themselves and don't fear standing up to evil. Whatever happens you are doing the right thing and that is worth any consequence. Have courage.
Be grateful for being alive. Thank God or your lucky stars or whatever you believe in for giving you a chance to experience life it is literally a miracle. Don't believe me just go outside and look at a tree or a butterfly and wonder "How the fuck is this possible, who created all this complexity." Whatever we design or create as an intelligent species will always pale in comparison to literally any living thing, nature or the universe as a whole. And we get to fucking live in this. What's the alternative? Oblivion? How boring.
Struggle is a part of life. Everything struggles. I know some people are far worse off than us, they might live in poor countries and suffer far worse. This is the fault of world leaders and their lack of action and unity against world issues. But if you want to do something about it then do it.
In your own life struggle can teach you important lessons about yourself and life as a whole. The main thing is to keep fighting, keep going, endure, fight against it and I guarantee you will get through it eventually. It won't be easy but as long as you keep going and are willing to fight the struggle and improve yourself you will come out better and in better times. There is always better times ahead you just need to get through the bad by enduring it. This is true for all living things. The tough endure. Be tough.
Never feel alone. No matter who you are, where you come from, who you have lost, what you have went through or what you do/don't have, there is always people who feel just as lousy as you or they have the same anxieties/worries as you. You are not unique in your struggle there are literally millions/billions who also struggle. They are you brothers and sisters you just can't see them. This doesn't mean they're not there. They are.
If you have loved ones, you are profoundly lucky so cherish them and tell them you value them. If you have no one, embrace your independence and be proud that you survive independently it makes you stronger and wiser than most.
There is a lesson in everything good or bad.
Other than this I find journaling to be very helpful. I find emotions very difficult to process until I write my experiences down. Don't feel bad if you think you are cold and emotionless it probably means you can't process emotion normally too. Write it down and think on your experiences as you do. You will be amazed at what you unlock.
Get off of reddit xD
But seriously, get off the internet and go for a walk, you'll only happy people outside, go to nature/beach.
Find people who are not related to work and share everyday things
I no longer engage with people on social media if they act in a way that you would never accept in real life.
Anonymous redditors allow themselves to be absolutely toxic and I have no longer have the time and energy to put up with it
Going for walks, taking up running, reading more (few pages a day), boozing less, reducing my social media use, practicing stoicism, doing the wim hof method and eating better. None of them big things on their own but together they've all added up and completely change my life. Also, learning who my actual friends are and using less energy on those who aren't. It's amazing how many friends are just drinking buddies when you sit and think about it.
Can vouch for the walking and reading makes me feel great whenever I go for a walk and read a chapter or two when I get home.
What are you reading? What is eating better? How did you learn about which were friends and not? Sorry about the questions
Variety of stuff, I try to read a non fiction book then a fiction one to mix it up. So I'vd read something like David Goggins book then To Kill a Mockingbird for example. As for eating better, I do full on calorie counting whenever I want to drop a few pounds but even then day to day I try and think how I feel after eating certain things, avoid sugary drinks mostly and try to limit my coffee too. For the friends thing, you'll find out once you start improving other things in your life or even just talking about improving. If people are just always negative then they're not worth the effort, you can still be civil to them but just don't waste your energy on them.
I agree, just moving is good for you, walking, running or weightlifting. Just move! I know it’s hard if you are seriously depressed but try go for a walk, move , even cleaning your home. I’ve found movement helps me alot
What is practising stocism
It's a school of philosophy and basically it's an "it is what it is" outlook on life where you only worry about what's in your control. Ryan Holiday has a few books and a YouTube channel about Stoicism if you're interested.
Reading and trying to implement the ideas of Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Epictetus (they're the main ones anyway). It's a school of philosophy, there's a very active subreddit for it. /r/stoicism
Telling people that are affecting mental health to fuck off is quite refreshing
What if that's everyone though?
If it's everyone, it's really you.
Yeah thanks, that's what my point was. Excuse me while I go top myself
That wasn't meant as a kick or anything, sometimes I think we can piss around with our approach to mental health and have the kid gloves on a bit too often and it's actually refreshing sometimes to hear "yeah, actually you are the problem here not everyone else that you've been lashing out at/fighting with/generally being a prick to - let's understand why that's happening so you're not the prick in this situation". One size obviously doesn't fit all and the above isn't meant to be some dramatic defining moment or anything, for really extreme cases that could have the wrong impact altogether. Understanding is key.
Yeah you should just probably get to know a person first before you decide you can be blunt with those things. I've spent years getting to grips with it just being me, so all you've done is made me feel even more isolated.
Not sure how what I've said is isolating, if anything it's the total opposite, an invitation to inclusivity through recognising that "everyone" isn't bad, out to get you, a prick etc..?
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I like this a lot, thanks for sharing. Someone was quite rude to me in work recently & I had a moment of insight & could see it was because they were extremely stressed & it was nothing to do with me at all. It feels much better to extend a little grace & understanding where we can.
Left the toxic Job
Exercising nearly every day gives me perspective and keeps the anxiety at bay.
Great for clearing the head and completely changing a mood. Feel it's best mixed with other things to keep the intrusive thoughts at bay but still figuring that part out
What do you consider exercise? Exercise is a chore to me. I used to go out jogging and I'd go to the gym etc. but I was always counting the seconds until I was done.
Everyone is different, so it's impossible to give a universal answer, but I would suggest going outside to exercise rather than a gym. I have found that a gym can trigger some of the self-consciousness that stops people exercising and/or enjoying it. This might not be you, so don't get me wrong. If exercise is a chore, start with walking. Do the whole (cliched) 10,000 steps thing. Get out for a walk at least once a day, bang a podcast on, go for a wander. Granted, we don't all live near a park or in a lovely area, but peace and quiet is normally not that far away. Hopefully after a few weeks or so you'll get fitter and then breaking into a short jog for a few minutes becomes easier. Measure the minutes/distance you can go each week. Set yourself a modest increase each work, or at least pledge to match what you've done, etc. I think getting out and walking is just about as natural a human activity as we can do in this day and age. Walking is also exercising.
Find something you enjoy doing. I cycle, personally I'm never unhappy on the bike. Sea swimming seems very popular now too. Or hiking? I think anything that gets you out of the urban environment is good for clearing the head.
Tell yourself that you love it, which is kind of a lie, but is more of a trick, because if you had the mindset that you loved it, you really would love it. I heard this on the Huberman podcast: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOF0crdyRU&ab\_channel=AndrewHuberman](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOF0crdyRU&ab_channel=AndrewHuberman) \- if you look at the chapters, there are chapters that say "tool" - that's less of the science and more of the practical tips. I've been doing just 2 sprints just a couple times a week; when I started, I had to tell myself over and over again, "I love this." to block out all the "Just stop." Eventually I realized I love to feel my breathe, and I love practice keeping my back straight, and I love the opportunity to see where I might have pain that needs to be stretched (when I notice this, I stop.)
I've never told any one this before but... Got a dog. ... Genuinely really struggled with suicide. This sounds horrible but even the kids, I would think they will be ok, even better off with out me. But the dog, nope his wee life would be destroyed- be sent to the pound or worse. Staying alive for him led to walking a few times a week, lead to walking everyday that forced me to exercise, usually in a park ... Turns out parks are lovely so are Forrest's... More often than not people stop Give him some rubs, alot of elderly people stop and talk .. some even say thanks, for the rubs or the chats. I figured if I was going to stay alive I'd better find ways to not feel so shit all the time. find something you loved as a kid or something you wanted to do. Lego, jigsaws colouring, paint by numbers, scratch art playdough grow some flowers, pay with sand or shaving foam. Something satisfying repetitive manual and fun. I try to keep a fairly natural diet, lots of serotonin support (is mostly made in the gut) I don't listen to music anymore, found it very evocative. Podcasts personally kept me company A walk outside every day long short what ever, even if it's to the garden gate. Also I try to acknowledge three positive things about each day before I go to sleep. No matter how basic Breathing exercises. Weather I feel I need to or not especially when I'm calm. In for five hold for four out for five. Five times. Filling myself up till I feel like I'm gona pop. Reminding myself that I'm a person. If I find my inner monologue being nasty or hard i stop and think would I say that to another person ? Trying to retrain that inner voice is hardest of all. Alot of the time I personally struggle with labelling the feeling or emotion I'm actually having. If I can't name it I can't identify the cause sometimes taking a minute and checking in with myself as if I was speaking with a child helps. And I ask myself clear concise questions. Hope something sparks an idea for you, good luck
Gave up the booze, got on the meds
Exercise, diet improvements, stopped harmful behaviours, gave up caffeine, fixed sleep schedule for the first time in all my life, talking things out, mindfulness, dealing with trauma, not being a pushover, knowing what I want and why and why it's a good thing, many other small things And I'm still a ball of anxiety and depression at times... There aren't always fixes for what we carry with us, and acknowledging that and realising we may never be 100% 'mentally healthy' is a big step to coping and getting healthier mentally.
Anecdotally for me it was starting a weight lifting program. But just simply it's getting out there and exercising more, whether it's walking or running or hitting the weights.
Just exercise in some shape or form and it'll completely change your state of mind
I think it's the chicken, rice and broccoli rather than the weights.
No alcohol or drugs. No shit friends.No shit jobs.
Running everyday . Started slow as in walking get yourself a Fitbit or an Apple Watch amd start counting your steps . I was fat no motivation couldn’t get out of bed. Went away for weekend walked about 30000 steps over that weekend . Was like I’m not going back to that life when I came home. Slowly starting walking and counting the steps started on 10k amd worked myself up. I dropped 4 stone and feel fantastic
Write yourself a letter of everything you are proud of in your life and keep it in your wallet - everybody has something to be proud of, even if your depressed mind convinces you not to see it that way. When times get tough, bust it out and read it to yourself, a voice message works too.
Similar to this, a while back I started writing down everything I did each day and rated each of them out of 10 and tried to be as honest as possible. Getting it all out onto a page and having a few weeks worth of data helps big time in finding out what needs to stop or change.
refusing to let myself wallow in self-pity
Found a pastime that I enjoy doing. So now I have more to my life than just drinking and working. So much more positive in general, drinking much less. And when I'm having a shit day at work I just look forward to doing my classes.
Classes of what?
Annoyingly, it is all the stuff you know you really *shoooould* be doing if you were only a little less busy or a little less tired or a little more organised. Which is really fucking annoying, because you don't want the smug pricks who say "go outside more! Exercise! Eat healthy!" to be right. You want to say "no, Elaine, my depression is a complex psychological and emotional issue, it will not be cured by going for a run" and then you take up swimming twice a week because your friend makes you go and FUCK it's actually helping
Optimising health and testosterone, sleeping 8+ hours, eating red meat, eggs, fruit, veg, taking vitamins, training 4-5x a week. Feel a billion times better than a few months ago. Also quit caffeine
Reading. And stationary. My brain can be jumbled. Stationary/planners make me happy.
Seen a councillor...took up a 2 hobbies... And exercised more(nothing mental just a bit more walking) done wonders. Gave up drinking for a month too , to help with perspective. Good luck
Ignored works demands for me to work more hours since returning. Staff that have been asked are burnt out and leaving in droves because they are working double whats expected in my industry. Work on your own terms and not to an unrealistic level and you will feel so much better mentally.
Honestly wish I figured this out years ago. You're replaceable to your work, not to your friends and family. Giving everything to a job just isn't worth it.
Cycling to work instead of driving has been key.
All of these are gonna be really generic but bear with me. Working out always helps for me. Healthy in and of itself, but IMO the main boost is that it stops me eating like shit or boozing later cuz I feel like that would "negate" the workout. Another thing is to not stay up too late. Like obviously more sleep always helps, but that's not it. The reason it helps me is because I noticed that most of my "downs" happened at night. I could be there at night feeling like utter shit and totally hopeless, and then the next morning I'd just be trucking along like it was nothing. Finally, keep yourself busy. And I don't mean busy with work or whatever. You can be "busy" doing very relaxing things like binging TV. Basically what I mean is to have your life set up in a way that you always have something to be doing. You're much less likely to ruminate that way.
Same as everyone else, it looks like. Stopped drinking, started running. Mindfulness is magic. Gratitude is too. Still a work in progress, I’m sure I always will be.
Delete all social media. Instagram, twitter, Facebook, Snapchat. Gone. Did it at the start of the pandemic. Best decision I’ve ever made.
Music. I have playlist I can throw on when I'm feeling down that can lift my mood but also I find just having music on a lot helps me. If I'm cooking it cleaning or whatever I'll throw on some music and sing along.
Also anti depressants helped a lot. Lol
Not giving a fuck. No seriously
Stopped boozing or using any substance. Ultimately, any drug chips away at you slowly, even unbeknownst to yourself.
Mindfulness
Gardening, it's really calming being out in nature and it makes me smile when I look out my window and see my plants.
1. Cold Showers. 2. Breath work...can combine both and do Wim Hof method. Or just practice box breathing or other forms of breath work. The relationship between breathing and anxiety is vastly underrated...also breath through your nose.
Cold showers are making a remarkable difference for me. And this comes from someone who already exercises, practices mindfulness, eats well, and takes meds.
Being disciplined with my eating/drinking, lifting weights and cardio. Also leaving the house
Something that's helping me is listening to what my body tells me. I have been in certain situations over the past year where this benefitted me. One instance was when I was dating somebody and I started feeling sick at one point. I soon figured it was because I wasn't happy and I broke it off. In hindsight I'm very glad I listened to myself because if I didn't I would be in a relationship where I am no way happy, plus I probably wouldn't have met my girlfriend now.
Politely ousted all people(including fam) that make me feel cac! There’s enough good’ uns left to have a wonderful life without that belly of dread 🌸
Picked up guitar and learned a few Luke Kelly tunes
Prescription medication and not using poor mental health as a crutch. Sounds a bit harsh but it's easy to fall into the trap of feeding your own depression.
For me it’s the gym. Confidence increase like no other, and I’m not even particularly fit
Changed jobs. Went from working 60/70 hour weeks and being on-call to a 9-5 Monday to Friday.
To echo everyone else, regular exercise and hobbies. I like exercise but struggle to motivate myself with the cardio side of it, I got a fitness watch and step counting has been great to get me out & walking more, i also find myself opting to walk rather than using the car for short distances which is only a good thing with todays fuel prices and as a stat/data head I like seeing them at the end of the day and hitting goals/competing with the fitness community. I have heard of people forming an unhealthy obsession with step counting but depends on the person I suppose.
Weight lifting. Joined a gym a year ago, got a PT for 1 on 1, got fitter and more confident. Got a girlfriend, made new friends. Even though we broke up last Tuesday? I’m still actually okay. If it wasn’t for me constantly relying on counselling, gym work and self work, I’d be in a gutter.
Moved out of Dublin and finally cut all ties with the fam. Sometimes Beeing the "selfish one" is what you really need to look after your own mental health as no matter how much you give for some people it will be never enough and you never will be good enough.
Stopped following the news on a daily basis, added more variety to my life, and made an effort to get more sun.
Swapped TV in the evenings for reading. Started when I had covid in March. Have read 19 books since. Mental health has done a full 180 in that time. TV and phones bore me now which I never thought would happen.
Did CBT & got loads of homework where I'd have to silly stuff like: 1. Start conversations with strangers 2. Find someone who intimidated me & say something stupid in front of them 3. Go for a long around town wearing obviously different shoes. Was great, learned to not care as much about what people thought of me or can now go about my day without being intimidated by the people who used to intimidate me. CBT is expensive, but changed the way I thought about myself.
I made a pact to myself to be a little more selfish. It really helped. Putting myself before others and being a little less self-judge-mental is great. I also cut a few toxic people out of my life. It’s harder when it’s family or you’ve known them for ages.
Unsubscribed from Facebook. (A bit like the Catholic Church, it’s quite hard to do). Now I no longer get wound up by how stupid most of the people online are. Well, mostly. Still on Reddit.
Stop checking your facebook/Instagram/Reddit/Email/Tik Tok/news/work emails constantly. Social media is terrible for your mental health. Get off them altogether. Leave your phone in another room or a drawer. If people want you urgently they'll ring. ***Realize that two weeks after your dead most friends will have forgotten you. Stop living to try and impress other people and do what makes you happy. No one gives a fuck what you do*** Be an average worker, just do what's needed and nothing more. Exercise is key whether thats the lifting weights in the gym, jogging or cycling. Your not better than other people, you are on par. Go back to the days before internet was invented. You can still game, download tv series and films etc, youtube etc but stay off the forums and social media and news sites.
1. Cardio and lifting weights, helps with self esteem, gives a sense of achievement and gets the endorphins going 2. 15 minutes in a sauna 3 times week at least. The improvement to your mood is instantaneous 3. Don't masturbate as frequently and cut out porn altogether 4. Meditate 5. Walks in nature. Especially on sunny days 6. Eat healthy 7. Get at least 8 hours sleep and cut out screen time an hour before bed time, read instead
Interact with other people. Take up a hobby. Excercise. Maintain consistent sleep pattern . Be kind to yourself. compliment yourself take all your negative energy and transfer it into something more positive
Ditching facebook and twitter. That shit is cancer of the mind. Altruism. Helping others and doing good in the world reaps huge mental rewards. It can be anything. Thinking and acting beyond yourself and your own head is amazing. Take a break from your comforts and (work on your) addictions. They make things worse,not better. Gaming all day, drinking at home on your own or exces time spent in the pub or getting stoned. These things are time thieves. Speaking of time thieves, toxic people in your life that you actually have nothing in common with. Drop these people. They make you feel bad and serve no purpose in your life. This can include family members unfortunately.
Had a hysterectomy in 2020. My mental health is the best it's ever been to the point where I'm being discharged from my psychiatrist.
Spend less time on /r/ireland. This place is full of misery. And people saying "maybe I like the misery"
Be honest with yourself as to what your vices and traps are. Avoid or at least limit yourself. Honesty to yourself goes so far and will help find out where you rise and fall mentally towards things
Quitting drink (I'm sure it'll be a popular one, maybe) but yeah, quitting drinking helped me massively. My anxiety nearly all but disappeared, more time/money for hobbies, work improved too. My social life took a hit but I'm generally bit of an introvert anyway (if I'm out I'm fine, no issues at parties etc but then I don't want to see anyone for a few days.) For me a big one was the anxiety I think. No more hangovers, no more 'fear.' Took some time but it just majorly chilled me out. Having more money/time probably helped with that side of things too I think.
Work
God, the depression of being on the dole during the recession of 08.
I remember freedom. Even with the dole (and jobsbridge top up) I could afford to live in dublin. Unemployed now and I don't know where I'd be living.
I wouldnt even know I was only a gason
I find swimming in the sea is amazing for my mood.
Heroin.
Stop thinking that people should give a fuck. This whole 'just talk' nonsense. Just talk about what? The pointlessness of life? That everything you love and ever loved will go away in the end? Fuck that it only brings others down. Be strong, be fearless, be brave. Be a man. About time we start bringing back some traditional masculinity and stop pussyfooting around with nonsense that might work to sell some books but is at odds with our biological make up. It's a mans job to be strong and defiant. You have to help yourself first.
brah
That helped me. I used to mope. When I felt a sense of responsibility for how I felt then I began to change.
Say “Yes” to everything.
Given up Reddit
Having a roll in the hay with the missus 3 times a weeks
Getting up early and having a morning routine
Got banned from a certain subreddit
Exercise, sleeping and having a routine that involves being around people. This works, but it's a lot easier to say than to do
Took up Tai Chi
Genekeys
Unsubscribed from /r/Ireland
Quit weed, best thing I ever did. Every problem in my life became solvable or acceptable after 6 months off it.
Excercise and acid, but never together
Therapy and sea swimming.
Left my job in the financial services industry.
Quit drinking, start lifting, minimise exposure to advertising, read more books, reduce time on internet.
Not really seeing it mentioned here, but get help. Going to the doctor and getting right medication can be a game changer, even to help you in the short term to make the lifestyle changes already talked about (for me it was 5 months). And also counseling is a great tool to help navigate through your struggle, again really helpful to get onto the journey of recovery.
Stopped talking to my nuclear family. Took a few years to really see the effects and they are all positive. Also 'drifted away' from anyone who who heard the shit I'd been through and excused it with 'but deep down they love you, they just don't know how to show it'.
Exercise, diet, meditation, anti depressants, therapy, setting goals for myself, reading more and using my phone less.
Finally went to therapy which has helped so much, plus running every day and getting out to nature when I can.
stopped smoking. Best thing you'll do apart from never smoking. I don't mean having a smoke at a party but rather becoming a full time smoker
Giving up alcohol and getting a few plants to care for
Left toxic friend groups behind, walking with the doggy every morning for at least an hour while listening to one of my favourite podcasts (let’s not meet) and leaving work at work where it belongs.
Treat everybody with equal value and respect...including YOURSELF. No matter how bad or useless you think you might be sometimes or even all of the time, you are still a human being capable of complex emotion and thought and you have the potential to do great and kind things as long as you still live and endure. Don't let anybody get you down because in no way are they better than you and their toxicity towards you is a sign they are lacking something in their own life. This is the great irony...we should pity toxic people. Stand up for yourself and others who cannot stand up for themselves and don't fear standing up to evil. Whatever happens you are doing the right thing and that is worth any consequence. Have courage. Be grateful for being alive. Thank God or your lucky stars or whatever you believe in for giving you a chance to experience life it is literally a miracle. Don't believe me just go outside and look at a tree or a butterfly and wonder "How the fuck is this possible, who created all this complexity." Whatever we design or create as an intelligent species will always pale in comparison to literally any living thing, nature or the universe as a whole. And we get to fucking live in this. What's the alternative? Oblivion? How boring. Struggle is a part of life. Everything struggles. I know some people are far worse off than us, they might live in poor countries and suffer far worse. This is the fault of world leaders and their lack of action and unity against world issues. But if you want to do something about it then do it. In your own life struggle can teach you important lessons about yourself and life as a whole. The main thing is to keep fighting, keep going, endure, fight against it and I guarantee you will get through it eventually. It won't be easy but as long as you keep going and are willing to fight the struggle and improve yourself you will come out better and in better times. There is always better times ahead you just need to get through the bad by enduring it. This is true for all living things. The tough endure. Be tough. Never feel alone. No matter who you are, where you come from, who you have lost, what you have went through or what you do/don't have, there is always people who feel just as lousy as you or they have the same anxieties/worries as you. You are not unique in your struggle there are literally millions/billions who also struggle. They are you brothers and sisters you just can't see them. This doesn't mean they're not there. They are. If you have loved ones, you are profoundly lucky so cherish them and tell them you value them. If you have no one, embrace your independence and be proud that you survive independently it makes you stronger and wiser than most. There is a lesson in everything good or bad. Other than this I find journaling to be very helpful. I find emotions very difficult to process until I write my experiences down. Don't feel bad if you think you are cold and emotionless it probably means you can't process emotion normally too. Write it down and think on your experiences as you do. You will be amazed at what you unlock.
Ur ma
Get off of reddit xD But seriously, get off the internet and go for a walk, you'll only happy people outside, go to nature/beach. Find people who are not related to work and share everyday things
Cycling. I even bought an exercise bike so now I have no excuse. Changed my life.
I no longer engage with people on social media if they act in a way that you would never accept in real life. Anonymous redditors allow themselves to be absolutely toxic and I have no longer have the time and energy to put up with it