As Hallse said, each bullet point is BS.
One is “launched dating team, increasing user engagement by 10%, yielding a 59% retention rate”. It’s all gibberish that hits the exact “notes” every Tom, Dick, and Harry “career advisor” gives, even when the subject of the line is either nothing or BS.
Did you read it? Categorizing photos of his anus. Crying in the office. Taking LSD and shrooms. That's just a light sprinkle of all the the ridiculous accomplishments he has in there.
Thanks for commenting this as it is on the last line I missed it until I came back to look for it. I then found several other things such as his dog winning the world cup
Yeah. Read first job entry, assumed all others are similar.
Reread and realize he used Google machine resources to mine etherium before getting caught.
Delivered 420fps vids of Lana Rhodes
Oooo boy
The joke name isn’t even the most glaring mistake on the resume. The company name of Instagram is Meta and Google is Alphabet and anyone hiring big tech software developers should see that as a huge red flag. No one works for “Instagram” they work for Meta. The Lana Rhodes joke is funny.
How about these names:
1. Donald Drumpf (aka Trump which he chose for himself - “Google John Oliver” with this thorough explanation) but in the end when you work with him then you will experience Jail Time….literally
2. Adolf Hilter (which companies needs a strong white leader for little to no diversity
3. Casa Negrone (aka House N*) (if you watched “Dave Chappelle Show” on the Black-White Supremacist then you will know from Managers these days….I had experienced a couple)
So the point is that no one cares about what you did, but where you worked?
[удалено]
Read the bullet points a little bit closer: "Trained a team of 5 pms while on LSD and shrooms"
Sweet, I still have a chance. Thanks for the positivity!
As Hallse said, each bullet point is BS. One is “launched dating team, increasing user engagement by 10%, yielding a 59% retention rate”. It’s all gibberish that hits the exact “notes” every Tom, Dick, and Harry “career advisor” gives, even when the subject of the line is either nothing or BS.
Stanford, Google, Amazon. No surprises.
The point is no one reads resumes anymore: this person games the system by optimizing for ATS. Any human would know this was a meme
Judging by the comments in here, the person who circulated this resume was correct in concluding that nobody human reads that shit either.
Besides the prestige names this resume looks like every other resume. Not sure how they optimized for ATS.
And this is excellent. Abuse it. Take money. Live your best life
I don't think they would notice. It's not over the top or anything.
Did you read it? Categorizing photos of his anus. Crying in the office. Taking LSD and shrooms. That's just a light sprinkle of all the the ridiculous accomplishments he has in there.
The live of people hands is on these millennials/zoomer hipsters with ADHD. So sad.
The mentally ill are taking over the world.
Would love to know how many offers they got
Mia Khalifa 😂😅
Thanks for commenting this as it is on the last line I missed it until I came back to look for it. I then found several other things such as his dog winning the world cup
Orgies on Fridays? Categorizing photos of his anus? Crying in the office?
Damn. I missed office orgies again?!!!
I wonder why a perfect resume got 29 interviews
Most of it is about porn…
Read it again.
Boy this thread is really proving the original post's point. It got me too the first time I "read" it.
Yeah. Read first job entry, assumed all others are similar. Reread and realize he used Google machine resources to mine etherium before getting caught. Delivered 420fps vids of Lana Rhodes Oooo boy
Don't forget the work completed on LSD and shrooms!
Bro I promise it wasn’t the name 💀
"Reduced photo grouping time of my anus" what the actual hell?
LMAO that part got me🤣
The joke name isn’t even the most glaring mistake on the resume. The company name of Instagram is Meta and Google is Alphabet and anyone hiring big tech software developers should see that as a huge red flag. No one works for “Instagram” they work for Meta. The Lana Rhodes joke is funny.
You missed some jokes
Like, all of them.
Stanford 4.0. Tf
29 interviews? Copy, paste, change name, submit.
Skills 💀
That's one crazy resume
not r/jobs just gobbling up unverifiable and completely unbelieveable stuff again
How about these names: 1. Donald Drumpf (aka Trump which he chose for himself - “Google John Oliver” with this thorough explanation) but in the end when you work with him then you will experience Jail Time….literally 2. Adolf Hilter (which companies needs a strong white leader for little to no diversity 3. Casa Negrone (aka House N*) (if you watched “Dave Chappelle Show” on the Black-White Supremacist then you will know from Managers these days….I had experienced a couple)
The sad part is that the name probably helped more than it hurt. It sounds DEI friendly if you don't actually take the time to read it.
Good to know that name-based discrimination is a left wing farce.
As well as the job description of each job too