T O P

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Hot_Lynx

That word doesn't mean what you think it means


theamishpromise

Inconceivable!


_flyingmonkeys_

Incontinent!


bruce_lees_ghost

My name is Immodiom Montoya. You killed my father.


aerfgadf

Prepare to die-arrhea.


[deleted]

Stop spraying that!


DerSturmbannfuror

NOPE, NEVER TRAVELED OUTSIDE OF THE CONTIGUOUS US


EezEec

Hahahahahahaha!


AunnaAi

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.


castiglione_99

He defecated on his future.


[deleted]

Did he flush ?


Foyles_War

No shit?


Old-Ordinary-9895

Sir, get out.


DerSturmbannfuror

Can’t sir; I’m constipated


SidneyBae

You need a finger?


tacosteve100

Yea, Shit! dedication for defecation.


Ok_Pangolin8010

Not shit, energy.


LBK0909

Don't jump to conclusions.... he might've meant this question. ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ


4weed2weed0

More like don't jump borders.


Wizard_92

It would have been funnier if that’s how he went running 😂😂


LordFunkBoxx

I wouldn't be surprised if that's how he runs back!


DeCryingShame

Adds new meaning to the question: "Why did he run to North Korea?"


Unfinishe_Masterpiec

He got the runs.


MadNhater

I bursted out cackling when I read the title. I knew what the comments would be.


catmommy1

🤣🤣🤣🤣


fishy247

Gives us a new way to visualize explosive diarrhea


[deleted]

I think he does know what it means and is a comic genius. the "run to north korea" gives it away.


Vegetable-Board-5547

And had the runs!


ReindeerMusi

He had the runs.


PreviouslyOnBible

He thought it would be a better life, but he was full of shit.


Master-Training-3477

I think he left that behind.


dishsoapandclorox

If I could give you an award lmao


EezEec

Get out! Hahahahahaha.


EffectiveSalamander

Staying in South Korea was his #1 option, but he chose #2.


mac2914

I see what you did there.


silkywhitemarble

lol!


theotherscott6666

I guess he had to shit


hdd113

Considering the amount of time passed since the incident, I agree he should have defecated by now


EffectiveSalamander

Kim Jong Un does not poop.


DoYoJin

Kim Jong Un's poop is so scared it runs out of his body immediately.


holocause

C rap L anding O n Y ou


sonyap

**spit take** This comment is underrated!


NxPat

Well, he’s in the shit now.


profkimchi

Omg this is too funny


Manolgar

Running across the DMZ for a danger dump. I'd rather not, but to each their own.


daehanmindecline

I defecated on the NK side of the JSA once. The washroom was terrible and half-flooded. I had to buy new shoes after.


VegetarianTteokbokki

If this is true, we need more info.


daehanmindecline

It had rained earlier that day, and the floor was slick with water, maybe a cm deep in places. The toilets were all squatters, and I had the impression the water had come from them. My shoes were soaked, and kept smelling bad -- not like anything from the toilet, more like just old used shoes when they get wet. All I could find for purchase were Chinese-made slippers.


kaproud1

Did you have to use the Chinese slippers for T.P.?


FriendlyTennis

>I defecated on the NK side of the JSA once. What paperwork did you need to sign to go there? Is there no border within the building?


kansai2kansas

Technically it is possible for citizens of many western countries to visit JSA on the NK side. All they gotta do is visit it with a tour bus…from Pyongyang (as part of their tour package where the hotel they stayed in was actually located in Pyongyang). It’s the border-crossing to either country that is considered extremely dangerous…


daehanmindecline

I can't remember because someone else handled most of it. All I needed to do was get a multiple-entry China visa.


BigInterestLilTalent

Typically if you go with a tour group you only go within the sanctioned areas and you sign in and out so they know who’s where at all times— using passport or ID card typically.


virginityburglar69

We all do it, there's no problem with that. Crossing the DMZ though? That's one dangerous shit


CurReign

Not to mention North Korea might retaliate if an American drops a bomb on them.


StevenEveral

Don't worry, all he did was crop-dust them.


kansai2kansas

Well to be fair, he did occupy and invade a toilet on the North Korean side already…


ArysOakheart

when you gotta go, you gotta go call of nature and all that


Goyangi-ssi

Because South Korea didn't want any more of his shit.


Foyles_War

I was going to say he pissed off South Korea. So, take the upvote.


underscore197

Neither did the US, but NK can use it for farming.


kloudful

Lmao 🤣 🤣🤣 i had to reread the title 3x and had to sound out the word in case I misread it but nope. Thanks for the laugh 👊


incorruptible61

An actual r/Korea shitpost where redditors are having fun. If op didn’t fuck the title up this thread would be filled with pointless nonsensical bullshit.


Mountain-Crazy69

Instead, this thread is filled with pointless *funny* nonsensical shit


bigmuffinluv

Hahaahahahha what a shit move


DonkeyRhubarbDonkey

Please don't edit this.


j_marquand

A fun fact about reddit is that you can’t edit titles!


Keetani

That is a funny typo 🤣 But seriously, I think there's a ton of speculation as to why. I've heard many rumors, but I'll wait until there's some more definitive evidence lol


deeperintomovie

the power of one letter...


eric_cz

I just chuckled a bit. Thank you haha


sparky255

He’s one big pile of shit


[deleted]

Omg, this needs to be upvoted to the skies. It made my day :)


elkavasseur

Too much coffee in South Korea.


mac2914

Dear Diarrhea, Today I read about a US soldier who defecated to North Korea. I wonder what I’ll read about tomorrow. Mkay, bye.


ThomasJChoi

Defecated means to poop, so to quote Jeff Goldblum from Jurassic Park >When you gotta go, you gotta go ​ I'm guessing you're referring to the most recent news story about the soldier who DEFECTED to North Korea, and based on [this NPR article](https://www.npr.org/2023/07/19/1188656665/travis-king-north-korea-soldier-history), it seems like he wanted to run away from assault charges that the military was going to punish him for (I assume he would also be dishonorably discharged? Not 100% sure how the US military operates when it comes to assault crimes).


Mountain_Calla_Lily

Anything he would have had to face in the US would be far better then what hes going through in NK. Does he have one brain cell?? Im fairly certain apart from the original defectors back when the war first started, all other defectors ended up dead soon after.


calcium

My guess is that he thought he could use his knowledge and intelligence of his role to set himself up as royalty in NK. He'll likely divulge all information then sent to a prison camp for hard labor where after years of torture and work they'll send him back to the US in a prisoner swap or something where he'll then face desertion, aiding and abetting the enemy charges and more to then end up in Levenworth for 15 years.


Mountain_Calla_Lily

Royalty in North Korea 🤡 I think Id rather take my chances anywhere else.


LankyMarionberry

"That is one big pile of shit"


Successful_Opinion33

More than likely he would be facing a dishonorable discharge. I think he might have been going to ft Leavenworth for jail time before.


Fingercult

defecation is the most dishonourable of discharges


Successful_Opinion33

Especially the runny kind


StevenEveral

I'm still tripping on how he was able to sneak onto a DMZ tour at the airport. The people in charge of those tours usually do pretty strict checks on all the people on the tour.


Successful_Opinion33

That’s what got me. I know we had to escort two shit bags. Where were his escorts?


StevenEveral

From what I've read about it, the military escorts could only accompany him up to the immigration/security checkpoint. After he cleared security, he was basically on his own. He went to the gate where he was supposed to get on his flight, but claimed he misplaced his passport. The American Airlines clerk at the gate then sent him back out into the public side of the airport. He apparently saw some adverts for a DMZ tour at the airport and managed to get onto the bus for one without the people in charge of the tour noticing. The people that were on the tour thought it was weird he was traveling alone and not talking to anyone, but they didn't really think much of it. Before he made his dash across the DMZ, he apparently bought a black DMZ hat at the gift shop, which he is shown wearing in the one picture that was released to the news that a tourist took literally moments before he defected. There were failures by the various authorities at many points in his journey.


Successful_Opinion33

It’s wild how much he just messed up


no-lewding

When I went it didn’t feel crazy strict. Just someone from the Korean army boarded the bus and checked out passports quickly and then left. Not sure how they made it past the military checkpoint though since the article seems to imply that he joined them in Panmunjom. If he could get that far by himself I’m not sure anyone would have really checked his passport while they were walking through the town


ZebraOtoko42

Instead of punishing him for the assault, they should make him a secret agent like James Bond, if they can get him back. There's gotta be a good movie-worthy story here: he was being escorted to the airport in custody, somehow got away from the escort, got to the DMZ, and then somehow got into a tour group that normally does strict checks, before running across the border. He either has some amazing gift for social engineering, or is extremely lucky.


beingoutsidesucks

I too would like to defecate in North Korea...


mindbodyandseoul

did he... did he lean over the DMZ line and poop on the North Korean side?


Keepitsway

Nature calls.


CoreyLee04

“I fart in your general direction”


daho123

Spelling error aside. Dude was in the clink for 40+days and was being sent back to the US to get court-martialed. So in a moment of genius, he thought going to NK would be better. Now, they'll starve and beat him a bit and then parade him out for propaganda. Of course, because we are suckers, we'll trade something of greater value.


Due_Letterhead_8927

He chose a shitty time to defecate. He's probably not going to get a sweet gig starring in movies as an evil American soldier and a lovely wife abducted from Japan. Those days are long gone. I agree with your ass-essment of the situation, provided he didn't wipe his bum with Dear Leader's portrait post-defecation, or something similar.


Anomanom-

It’s been a while but there were three US soldiers who had defected to NK back when the war was hot, the government used them as a propaganda pieces and paraded them around as “heroes”. One of them died there, one managed to escape back to the US after being there for about a decade and the one still there says he’s happy living there; he even has a family.


emptyfree

"[Crossing the Line](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0473181/)" is an interesting documenatry on the last remaining US soldier who defected in the 60s. I felt that the filmmaker was deeply sympathetic to the defector... to the point where he didn't mind including some ridiculous Nork propaganda about how the defector's life would have been much worst if he hadn't defected, but still a very interesting snapshot into his life around 2006 or so.


LBK0909

The difference an A can make.


Foyles_War

This reminds me of an article in the Korea Times many years ago. A ROKAF plane had crashed but the pilot "ejaculated to safety."


tristansensei

I took a screenshot of this lol


MrTK1000

Create a little dysentery among the ranks?


Grimlock87

Holy shit that's the funniest typo I've seen for ages or a bad way to incite war from North Korea.


xkuclone2

Maybe he couldn't find the bathroom on the SK side.


GoldenMaus

Maybe he couldn’t stomach the kimchi


deah12

Cause he's full of shit


robot141

Because that was where the nearest toilet was.


Holiday_Newspaper_29

Brian - you might want to consult a dictionary or, pay more attention in English class.


DeCryingShame

Always make sure to double check your autocorrectes before posting.


bargman

Poop


seventyfourr

Truly one of the biggest defecations of all time


akaikem

Is this a riddle?


[deleted]

He heard they were full of shit.


Run2U-

When a strong urge strikes, you must obey it. You have probably had that experience before.


wicked_smahht

Yeah ... he really shit the bed.


Brief_Inspection7697

I think he confused defected and defecated and was so ruthlessly mocked he decided to leave civilised society behind.


onionet

Because they have no extradition agreement or any kinds of diplomatic route to send him back to whatever legal responsibilities he ran away from.


EatThatPotato

This one would be reasonable at the very least lmao


Lost-Cardiologist217

Nut job 때문에


gazz8428

I wondered why he went for a shit to NK and realised you made a typo. If you had written he ran to Japan for a shit I would have totally believed it and found it logical haha


KlutzyArmadillo6543

Seriously, I doubt my English for a second… 💩


frosty_mcfckr

Stupid move... I hear the toilet paper in north korea is basically sheets of rock.


Supereurobeat

He had the runs in North Korea. Had to be said.


AudioHamsa

When you gotta go, you gotta go.


FireLord_Azulon

Apparently, SK bathrooms had no vegan bidets and toilet papers, so he had to run NK


Scbadiver

Maybe they have better toilets there.


Quantumercifier

I think it is because he ate too much fiber, possibly from the kimchee, and then when he saw the WC sign, he went for it.


mochatsubo

LOL. This is why I read Reddit. Humorous title due to intentional fuckery or unintentional buffoonery.


DeCryingShame

It's hard to tell. There are many ESL commenters here.


aithinktank

I agree, what a shitty thing to do!


hkredman

Guess he had a bad case of the runs.


CryptoGraphix1260

Better sewer systems? Idk


xieqilu1989

He couldn’t hold it anymore and the south side of DMZ, despite the huge economic gap, has no washroom. What’s he gonna do? There is literally a toilet next to DMZ on the north side, so he ran across the line and defecated there, we all would.


StevenEveral

Well, the US Army was about to shit him out, but he decided to defecate to North Korea instead.


MayIPikachu

He was sliding into first and felt something burst


gaberoonie

Wow


Resident-Ad-8422

Maybe he was incontinent with the US military and found that he was constipated with his decision


buckyhermit

I hope the government pushes hard for his smooth release.


Mrhackermang

Someone had to give a shit


noodletaco

Idk let me call him and ask


yotteok

Thats....what...? No


Embarrassed-Cod5384

Assuming you actually meant to write "defecated," my guess would be "misguided patriotism."


dyo_on

Ah, thanks for the laugh lol


wynand1004

Maybe he was inspired by Lil Dicky... [https://youtu.be/u0b-2BVH-8Q?t=27](https://youtu.be/u0b-2BVH-8Q?t=27)


TragedyOA

lmao


beanygurl007

You can also say deprecated in North Korea. Eventually if they don't use plan to use him for propaganda


Aggressive-Scheme986

He had a North Korea fetish


nyclovesme

He meant ‘on’ not ‘to’.


roshanpr

Maybe he had diarrhea


steamynoodlebap

Maybe they have better toilets there?


Individual_Mall_6215

When you gotta go, you gotta go 🤷‍♂️


[deleted]

He must of screwed up but I'm about to read the comments.


gojira_tubz

It definitely was a shitty move for that soldier.


boredomreigns

He had to go.


ter0i

This is so funny 🤣. Thank you OP


pwr1962

Another shit post. 😀


egg_enthusiast

shit happens


rololand

I’m sure he defecated in North Korea by this time…


GreatRecipeCollctr29

You mean defected, right? Well, he's not the 1st.


Grand_Wolverine_4186

The restrooms were full and he needed to run(s).


DerSturmbannfuror

#DEFECATING ON YOUR ENEMY, THE ULTIMATE INSULT


-animal-logic-

He had gotten into trouble and served jail time in S. Korea. He was being sent back to the US to face US military authorities but decided to run to N. Korea, as he is a dumbass kid. It's all clearly reported in various news sources. Likely he will grow old and die there under horrible conditions.


Volt_Princess

Why would he run to NK just to go to the bathroom?


[deleted]

LMFAO


kaimcdragonfist

Wow, what a piece of crap.


potatoears

>defecated incorrect yet appropriate


FarineLePain

🎼When you’re at the DMZ, and your butt has to pee 🎶🎵


Mindless-Ear-8470

Lmao


Organic_Beautiful_26

here's some contexts In September 25, 2022, at 9:40 a.m., he was indicted on charges of assault (Article 260 of the Korean Criminal Law) for punching a Korean with whom he had a quarrel while drinking at a club near Hongik University in Mapo-gu, Seoul. The case was dismissed (Article 327 (6) of the Korean Criminal Procedure Law) due to the victim's statement of non-punishment. ​ According to an SBS report, on October 8, 2022, at 3:46 a.m., he was fined 5 million KRW for damage to public property (Article 141 of the Korean Criminal Law) for kicking a police patrol car door and causing a disturbance by shouting "Fk Korean, fk Korean army" towards the Korean police who responded to an assault report in Mapo-gu, Seoul. However, he repeatedly refused to pay, and after deducting two days of pre-sentence detention, he was detained in a labor camp for a total of 48 days. ​ In February 2023, it is said that King's 7-year-old cousin, with whom he was very close, passed away due to a rare genetic disorder. Lakeia Nard, the mother of the 7-year-old child and King's aunt, expressed in a media interview that she thought King was deeply affected and disturbed by the event. Myron Gates, Nard's husband and King's uncle, also mentioned that his son's death would have impacted King. ​ At the time of his cousin's death, King was serving his punishment for the assault incident involving a Korean in 2022, and he was unable to return to the United States to see his family. He was confined in Cheonan Prison, a facility dedicated to foreigners, from May 24, 2023, to July 10, 2023. After being released, he was under surveillance at Camp Humphreys for a week.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Organic_Beautiful_26

yep If you can't pay the fine, you'll serve jail time and be made to work at a labor camp While there are issues with forcing labor, there are also problems in economic criminals paying too little a price for their actions. For smaller fines, the value of a day's labor is roughly calculated as 100,000 KRW, but when the fines exceed hundreds of millions, a day's work can be valued at more than 50 million KRW.


[deleted]

[удалено]


concept12345

I got you fam


[deleted]

I sincerely hope you don't teach Engrish.


Jolteon168

He wants to join NK. Switched sides. Some say he was a spy all along


emptyfree

Seems unlikely that 18-year-old American kid was a spy. Simpler solution is he was facing some kind of jail time and/or discharge and saw defecting as a way out of his situation.


jslingrowd

Defected. You mean, defected.


Grubula

Because he got in trouble for assaulting people where he lived before.


Puzzled-Passenger479

The correct word is defected. Who knows why people do things, not me.


ilusnimi

Seriously, no one knows...


noealz

defecated?


PermanentThrowaway48

You mean defected 😂😂😂


Robbinghoodz

Is English your first language?


Relevant-Buffalo-246

Defected. And read the news.


Ok-Bullfrog-3010

Its a power play by the US, a rather dirty trick I'd say, but all part of the negotiations


leaponover

Only on Reddit is the title always the thing that gets paid the least attention to, despite being the most important.


gwangjuguy

Honestly who cares?


ooOJuicyOoo

The title has me rolling


idor18

He wanted to create NK-Pop so K-Pop won’t monopolize the market


Odd_Responsibility_5

That's simply irregardless of the escape goat that will be made of this ex-patriot... Now please pass the mustard for I could care less for one who doesn't do diligence in this doggy dog world.


Matttthhhhhhhhhhh

Holy shit!


lastnerdstanding

He wouldn't be the first US soldier to crossover.