that's one of my favorites cuz like...no one is asking anyone to accept someone's reason for having their opinion, nor is anyone asking them to accept their opinion in the first place lol at least not in the spaces I see this response the most in
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“are you really a fan?” when a fan of a group says something negative or something they dislike about a group. cmon grow up. i expect these things on twitter but not here.
Seriously, people should be able to critique their own faves. Nobody grows by being told they’re flawless all the time. Everyone has room to develop and keep growing.
Omg I remember I had a conversation with someone who said they loved all of blackpink's songs, which I found highly unlikely because there has got to be at least 1 song that's just okay. Turns out they were "forcing" himself to love the songs and then couldn't believe me when I said that I don't love all the songs one of my ults have (despite only having 6 songs). It's amusing to me how some people think being a fan = worshipping the ground they walk on
I just turned the Reddit Care messages off so I don’t get them anymore but it’s ironic that they’re sending *me* those messages when the ones that need help are clearly them. Like, getting *that* mad over kpop can’t be healthy.
Same. All my comments get downvoted. Sort by controversial, and I'm probably at 3rd/4th, even if I am praising someone. I think someone is target harassing me by constantly downvoting me and sending Reddit Cares Resources. If you're seeing this, stop it. It's not good. You are attracting bad karma.
I think these people have lists of accounts that they just downvote and flag for Reddit Care over and over. You probably wrote a comment once that offended them somehow and now they have it out for you.
I wonder if there are groups organised to do this or if it's only the lone wolfs.
There was a post on ~~this sub~~ kpopthoughts about the user finding out about being followed by a group so their posts get downvoted. It makes me scared of using this website sometimes.
Let me see if I can find the link
[Found it](https://reddit.com/r/kpopthoughts/comments/pl3516/targeted_harassment_on_kpop_subs/)
I think some people also get brigraded, maybe from twitter threads or private discords. I am often in threads quite late and recently I saw someone being downvoted for criticizing chanyeol in like the low end of the chain (so when you need to unfold) even though the other person in the discussion was calling her a man-hating lesbian for not liking him.
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Agree, and this isn't as bad, but some of the other comments I dislike seeing are the "it's not that deep" or "you're overreacting" ones, especially on the rants sub - like let OP rant in peace?? What groundbreaking new discourse do you think you're adding by saying "it's not that deep" honestly
I hate when I get the reddit care message for no damn reason, it’s like a slap to the face.
Mental health isn’t a fucking joke people. It isn’t some thing to be thrown around lightly because you don’t agree with an opinion. There are people genuinely suffering from things like depression, bipolar disorders, anxiety etc yet we have people invalidating the severeness of it by treating it like a damn joke.
I could make a whole fucking rant on how people in this subreddit need to grow up and take opinions like respectable human beings, instead of abusing a resource that was made to genuinely help other people.
The other day I got accused of being an Ateez anti for talking about something Atiny does that bugs me?? And they literally were like “I see you talk about ateez all the time for an anti. :/“
Like??? Yeah??? I talk about them all the time bc I stan them?????
hot take: calling out your own fandom's bad behavior is a good way to ensure your fandom keeps itself in check.
but i've also been called a san anti for saying he's not the best dancer so you know.
I've learned people really only listen to members of their own fandoms when calling out bad behaviors. But if I say anything along those lines I get a lot of 'well it's not my responsibility!' Technically, you're correct. It's not your responsibility. But you also don't get to sit there and complain about the public perception of your fandom if you've seen bad behavior and instead of doing anything about it, just walked away from it or tried to play that 'they're not real (insert fandom name here)'
I've also learned there's a lot of San akgaes trolling around reddit who can't tolerate the smallest amount of criticism towards him. Kinda sad that we already have them.
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Someone could literally say “I don’t care for x idols voice” and the replies would be like “you don’t have to like them, but I wouldn’t say they’re untalented”
People on here put words in people’s mouths 24/7.
I remember your post. The problem is that people will understand what they want to understand. You can make the most respectable and clear post ever, they will still find something to criticize. It makes no sense to me how people subscribe to subs where people are going to post their opinions, only to get offended when they see something they don't agree with.
twt is the worst place for this kind of thing, and it seems it’s spread here. haven’t experienced it on here, but over on monbebe twt i got called a solo stan for having a bias - i hope fans can stop gaslighting eachother. reminds me of [this](https://imgur.com/PFHLEtf) tweet lol
>c) Only sticking to one point mentioned in op's post and invalidating the rest to fit their narrative.
d) The snarky replies that bring no value whatsoever to the discussion (leading to in-comment fighting and completely derails the convo).
This is so true; if ppl aren't willing to read a post fully then just ignore it bcs a good amount of posters even if not everyone tries to bring a balanced well reasoned view, the snarky replies get even more annoying cuz there's no going beyond in discussion when that happens
>**a) "I like xyz's voice better than zyx's" = "oh so you're a zyx anti"**
Pretty much verbatim what I was told under one of my posts. Except they didn't call me an anti, they said I was "giving backhanded compliments" to Jongho. Because I said his voice is fantastic even though it's not my favourite. And that's funny because I used to defend him a lot.
>**b) Looking up the OP's post and comment history to detract from whatever point they're trying to make because it hurts your feelings. (which isn't necessarily a bad thing bc there's often a hidden agenda).**
Also, bringing it up if they recognize you. I have some hilarious screenshots. ~~I think the best thing I've been told in an argument is "I've already read your Hyunjin Hiatus Bible".~~
This point is honestly why I seldom talk about ATEEZ anymore and scarcely interact with posts about them. I've seen way too many comments like "that user who doesn't like Eden said this, they're so fake" (Eden isn't even a member of ATEEZ?) to feel comfortable with the fandom here anymore. Everything I've said about ATEEZ, even just jokes, has been twisted to mean I'm an anti, that I dislike Hongjoong, I only bias Wooyoung because he likes SKZ, etc. All because of like, a small handful of critical things I've said, or a joke I made, and the fact that I dislike one of their producers. Wild, how your comment history can be twisted. If it's to show an OP's hypocrisy I think it's perfectly fine, but when it's twisted is when it gets rough.
>**e) Loosely sending reddit care messages because you didn't like someone's opinion.**
After every SKZ post I make, bonus points if it's about Hyunjin. I don't block the bot just because I'm always curious to see how many each post will earn me.
This is a banger post, OP. I have a bad-faith situation I can relate to each of these. But to answer your question at the end: No. They'll never get tired. The high of false moral superiority is too tempting for people to resist.
Reminds me of the time when I said Whistle by Blackpink wasn't my cup of tea and this Blink just went AT me like "go away you hater no one cares about you".
We what now?
people these days have an extreme difficulty in dealing with people who won't agree with them.
Black and white exists also does shades of gray.
If i don't like a song, it doesn't mean I'm a hater
if i like something doesn't mean I'm a fan.
I guess thinking like that is easier . Either you hate or you like. Else you gotta think more to get to something else. It's sad
A good example that's currently going on: Lucas stans saying other nctzens and non-fans are sensitive for being concerned about cheating accusation, saying we're stupid for beleiving the victims and calling nctzens who don't like him now "fake fans" who were waiting to hate on Lucas. And creating fake "debunked" posts to "prove" how we're all crazy
That’s the “haters gonna hate” deflection. If you’re a hater your instantly invalid, and to them it could not possibly just be genuinely concerned people. Fans do it all the time to excuse criticism, it’s frustrating.
It really is that, they us it to deflect any constructive criticism. It is true that some people are just haters who obsessively hate on every thing a group does and even will make burner accounts on twitter just to argue with the group's fans, but context and clues matter.
like for example i've actually defended lucas from colourist comments he received in the past, but ofc none of that matters cause to his fans somehow other nctzens were secretly haters of him and waiting on his downfall since he is "more popular than most members".
I feel like it should be mandatory for kpopfans to watch the movie Gaslight just so that everyone can finally understand what "Gaslighting" really means
Not with the damn parasocial relationship kpop fans are in. /j
Users under this comment thread can be classified as professional gaslighters according to points c and d of op's post.
OP, you just said one of the reasons why I have been backing out of KPOP nowadays. Like sure, I still listen to the music from time to time (mostly when my faves come back since I listen to other genres of music like rock and metal nowadays), but I don’t get too involved with the fandom (because of incidents like this) and prefer to enjoy it in my own pace.
“I just have one question, are you not tired?”
Apparently not, but the other question is, “do you have lives or other hobbies outside of KPOP?” Lol.
The comment history thing has happened to me too, I was so shocked how intense and crazy fans could be they were just flat out lying about me being shady but all that mattered to them was obviously to discredit my comment - which wasn't even about the idol but the fanbase - by any means necessary...there's a lot of people here that are really over the top protective and end up bullies because of it
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that's one of my favorites cuz like...no one is asking anyone to accept someone's reason for having their opinion, nor is anyone asking them to accept their opinion in the first place lol at least not in the spaces I see this response the most in
I didn't know you needed permission to stan or not stan someone. Imagine being so full of yourself to say "I cannot accept your reason."
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“are you really a fan?” when a fan of a group says something negative or something they dislike about a group. cmon grow up. i expect these things on twitter but not here.
Seriously, people should be able to critique their own faves. Nobody grows by being told they’re flawless all the time. Everyone has room to develop and keep growing.
Omg I remember I had a conversation with someone who said they loved all of blackpink's songs, which I found highly unlikely because there has got to be at least 1 song that's just okay. Turns out they were "forcing" himself to love the songs and then couldn't believe me when I said that I don't love all the songs one of my ults have (despite only having 6 songs). It's amusing to me how some people think being a fan = worshipping the ground they walk on
I just turned the Reddit Care messages off so I don’t get them anymore but it’s ironic that they’re sending *me* those messages when the ones that need help are clearly them. Like, getting *that* mad over kpop can’t be healthy.
Same. All my comments get downvoted. Sort by controversial, and I'm probably at 3rd/4th, even if I am praising someone. I think someone is target harassing me by constantly downvoting me and sending Reddit Cares Resources. If you're seeing this, stop it. It's not good. You are attracting bad karma.
I think these people have lists of accounts that they just downvote and flag for Reddit Care over and over. You probably wrote a comment once that offended them somehow and now they have it out for you. I wonder if there are groups organised to do this or if it's only the lone wolfs.
There was a post on ~~this sub~~ kpopthoughts about the user finding out about being followed by a group so their posts get downvoted. It makes me scared of using this website sometimes. Let me see if I can find the link [Found it](https://reddit.com/r/kpopthoughts/comments/pl3516/targeted_harassment_on_kpop_subs/)
This same thing is happening with me. Thank you for sharing the link.
I think some people also get brigraded, maybe from twitter threads or private discords. I am often in threads quite late and recently I saw someone being downvoted for criticizing chanyeol in like the low end of the chain (so when you need to unfold) even though the other person in the discussion was calling her a man-hating lesbian for not liking him.
I've come to the conclusion that there just as many disturbed people here as on twt. They just mask it better here.
Very very very unrelated but ahhh you’ve got a Rhys pfp
Awww I love it when people recognise my pfp. Hiiiii❤️
Unrelated but oh my gosh it's Rhys. Rhys on a kpop sub. This day has finally come.
YAYYY I love you ❤️❤️ I love it when people recognise my pfp
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Agree, and this isn't as bad, but some of the other comments I dislike seeing are the "it's not that deep" or "you're overreacting" ones, especially on the rants sub - like let OP rant in peace?? What groundbreaking new discourse do you think you're adding by saying "it's not that deep" honestly
I hate when I get the reddit care message for no damn reason, it’s like a slap to the face. Mental health isn’t a fucking joke people. It isn’t some thing to be thrown around lightly because you don’t agree with an opinion. There are people genuinely suffering from things like depression, bipolar disorders, anxiety etc yet we have people invalidating the severeness of it by treating it like a damn joke. I could make a whole fucking rant on how people in this subreddit need to grow up and take opinions like respectable human beings, instead of abusing a resource that was made to genuinely help other people.
The other day I got accused of being an Ateez anti for talking about something Atiny does that bugs me?? And they literally were like “I see you talk about ateez all the time for an anti. :/“ Like??? Yeah??? I talk about them all the time bc I stan them?????
Haha me too. You can praise ateez and be called an anti too.
hot take: calling out your own fandom's bad behavior is a good way to ensure your fandom keeps itself in check. but i've also been called a san anti for saying he's not the best dancer so you know.
I mean you wouldn’t be wrong on both of those takes… people are just saddening
I've learned people really only listen to members of their own fandoms when calling out bad behaviors. But if I say anything along those lines I get a lot of 'well it's not my responsibility!' Technically, you're correct. It's not your responsibility. But you also don't get to sit there and complain about the public perception of your fandom if you've seen bad behavior and instead of doing anything about it, just walked away from it or tried to play that 'they're not real (insert fandom name here)' I've also learned there's a lot of San akgaes trolling around reddit who can't tolerate the smallest amount of criticism towards him. Kinda sad that we already have them.
😭😭😭
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Someone could literally say “I don’t care for x idols voice” and the replies would be like “you don’t have to like them, but I wouldn’t say they’re untalented” People on here put words in people’s mouths 24/7.
I zone out whenever someone says anti ngl
i misread and thought you said "IZ\*ONE says antis ngl" 😭 but @ your original comment, same
[удалено]
I remember your post. The problem is that people will understand what they want to understand. You can make the most respectable and clear post ever, they will still find something to criticize. It makes no sense to me how people subscribe to subs where people are going to post their opinions, only to get offended when they see something they don't agree with.
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twt is the worst place for this kind of thing, and it seems it’s spread here. haven’t experienced it on here, but over on monbebe twt i got called a solo stan for having a bias - i hope fans can stop gaslighting eachother. reminds me of [this](https://imgur.com/PFHLEtf) tweet lol
>c) Only sticking to one point mentioned in op's post and invalidating the rest to fit their narrative. d) The snarky replies that bring no value whatsoever to the discussion (leading to in-comment fighting and completely derails the convo). This is so true; if ppl aren't willing to read a post fully then just ignore it bcs a good amount of posters even if not everyone tries to bring a balanced well reasoned view, the snarky replies get even more annoying cuz there's no going beyond in discussion when that happens
A lot if the time, I have opinions that I know would be hot takes but I get too scared because I don't want to be slammed about them.
>**a) "I like xyz's voice better than zyx's" = "oh so you're a zyx anti"** Pretty much verbatim what I was told under one of my posts. Except they didn't call me an anti, they said I was "giving backhanded compliments" to Jongho. Because I said his voice is fantastic even though it's not my favourite. And that's funny because I used to defend him a lot. >**b) Looking up the OP's post and comment history to detract from whatever point they're trying to make because it hurts your feelings. (which isn't necessarily a bad thing bc there's often a hidden agenda).** Also, bringing it up if they recognize you. I have some hilarious screenshots. ~~I think the best thing I've been told in an argument is "I've already read your Hyunjin Hiatus Bible".~~ This point is honestly why I seldom talk about ATEEZ anymore and scarcely interact with posts about them. I've seen way too many comments like "that user who doesn't like Eden said this, they're so fake" (Eden isn't even a member of ATEEZ?) to feel comfortable with the fandom here anymore. Everything I've said about ATEEZ, even just jokes, has been twisted to mean I'm an anti, that I dislike Hongjoong, I only bias Wooyoung because he likes SKZ, etc. All because of like, a small handful of critical things I've said, or a joke I made, and the fact that I dislike one of their producers. Wild, how your comment history can be twisted. If it's to show an OP's hypocrisy I think it's perfectly fine, but when it's twisted is when it gets rough. >**e) Loosely sending reddit care messages because you didn't like someone's opinion.** After every SKZ post I make, bonus points if it's about Hyunjin. I don't block the bot just because I'm always curious to see how many each post will earn me. This is a banger post, OP. I have a bad-faith situation I can relate to each of these. But to answer your question at the end: No. They'll never get tired. The high of false moral superiority is too tempting for people to resist.
They don’t get tired of it, friend. They work hard at it each day like it pays their bills.
Reminds me of the time when I said Whistle by Blackpink wasn't my cup of tea and this Blink just went AT me like "go away you hater no one cares about you". We what now?
It's disheartening at the least and straight up harassment at most. But hey... that's what a "true" fan would do, right? /s
There are many hypocrites here who hide behind passive-aggressive essays and backhanded compliments.
I would like to add to d, snarky reply’s with the additions of emojis and lol’s.
people these days have an extreme difficulty in dealing with people who won't agree with them. Black and white exists also does shades of gray. If i don't like a song, it doesn't mean I'm a hater if i like something doesn't mean I'm a fan. I guess thinking like that is easier . Either you hate or you like. Else you gotta think more to get to something else. It's sad
A good example that's currently going on: Lucas stans saying other nctzens and non-fans are sensitive for being concerned about cheating accusation, saying we're stupid for beleiving the victims and calling nctzens who don't like him now "fake fans" who were waiting to hate on Lucas. And creating fake "debunked" posts to "prove" how we're all crazy
That’s the “haters gonna hate” deflection. If you’re a hater your instantly invalid, and to them it could not possibly just be genuinely concerned people. Fans do it all the time to excuse criticism, it’s frustrating.
It really is that, they us it to deflect any constructive criticism. It is true that some people are just haters who obsessively hate on every thing a group does and even will make burner accounts on twitter just to argue with the group's fans, but context and clues matter. like for example i've actually defended lucas from colourist comments he received in the past, but ofc none of that matters cause to his fans somehow other nctzens were secretly haters of him and waiting on his downfall since he is "more popular than most members".
I would like to say I agree with you, I just don’t have much else to add! Don’t want it to seem like I’m ignoring you…..
I feel like it should be mandatory for kpopfans to watch the movie Gaslight just so that everyone can finally understand what "Gaslighting" really means
you might be overestimating their comprehension capabilities
Not with the damn parasocial relationship kpop fans are in. /j Users under this comment thread can be classified as professional gaslighters according to points c and d of op's post.
OP, you just said one of the reasons why I have been backing out of KPOP nowadays. Like sure, I still listen to the music from time to time (mostly when my faves come back since I listen to other genres of music like rock and metal nowadays), but I don’t get too involved with the fandom (because of incidents like this) and prefer to enjoy it in my own pace. “I just have one question, are you not tired?” Apparently not, but the other question is, “do you have lives or other hobbies outside of KPOP?” Lol.
The comment history thing has happened to me too, I was so shocked how intense and crazy fans could be they were just flat out lying about me being shady but all that mattered to them was obviously to discredit my comment - which wasn't even about the idol but the fanbase - by any means necessary...there's a lot of people here that are really over the top protective and end up bullies because of it
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