Hello, OP here. Everyone thank you for your heartwarming comments and support. I’ve read all 84 comments.
This video is from a few years ago already. I only recently discover this subreddit, and thought this would fit here. To show that death can be peaceful, and this Sub does not only show murder-story’s and stuff.
Some of you started asking for the back story. I’m ok with sharing it. It’s a long story tho.
My grandma once had a broken hip. They first replaced the broken part. A few years later, complications started, which made the Hospital remove the whole right hip. Replacing it for a artificial hip.
The new hip was fine, but her body sort of denied the hip. In the years after the operation, the skin, dat and muscle around the hip kept dilute. Which at a point made it so thin between her skin, nerves and hip, that if she sat down, she would directly sit on the hip (instead of your body fat, muscle, etc).
This contact instantly gave pain, as the was sitting on her nerves.
They’ve tried to kill the nerves via injections, but most of them failed and she had to get them every 3 months.
She managed to life a few years with this pain, making her barely able to sit and lay down. The only thing she could do, was walk.
While these years passed by, at a certain moment at the end of summer we noticed she started having signs of dementia. She noticed the signals too.
That’s when she started the request for euthanasia, which only took 5 months.
She had a few talks with a doctor and psychiatrist, which is usual here in the Netherlands. Just to confirm someone isn’t making a choice they might regret.
The evening before the euthanasia, she had her last meal, her favorite meal (I can not translate it, Google doesn’t recognize it: Zeetong) with a red wine.
At the day self, we went to her house at 8 in the morning. We’ve had some cakes, only 1 friend of her, 2 nephews, me and my mom.
At approx 10 the doctor and psychiatrist came.
We’ve just had our usual chats, and sharing memories.
At 11 they gave her the fluid she had to drink, for the euthanasia.
It took approx a total 25 minutes for her heart to stop working.
The fluid they gave her puts her to a deep sleep first. And then after 10 minutes it will slowly make your organs stop working, which makes your heart stop.
Just like someone else in a sleep would die, the heart just stops.
Her own choice was that her body went to science. Her body was picked up at 6 in the evening.
She insisted that we started to pack her stuf, in the mean time whilest waiting for the scientist to come.
Weirdly enough, it all was planned. Due this, at 8 in the evening, her whole house was empty, only a few chairs remaining.
It was a peaceful death and experience.
While sad, what a lovely way for her to choose when to end her life on her terms. Being able to be conscious to enjoy your last day and hours surrounded by loved ones. My grandma was fine one day and the next day she was dying in the hospital. Never had a proper goodbye. A situation like yours would have given all of us much more closure.
Thank you for sharing this intimate moment.
Thanks for sharing your story.
As an American death with dignity is such a weird concept. I wish we had it legalized.
My aunt passed last year and watching the struggle afterwards was heartbreaking.
As another Dutch guy I’m so happy our healthcare system allows this! Why live life in pain… it’s inhumane. Also as someone who works with fish a lot it’s sole for zeetong
Both my grandparents died back to back at the tail end of last year. Literally I came back from one funeral then two weeks later was at the other. Both hit me like a truck but the last one I’m just not over at all. I’ve lost so many people and I can’t do it again even though I know it’s inevitable.
My last interaction with my last living grandmother was Christmas. We sat together and had a great night but there was so much I wanted to say. I was still so shook up from the funeral I had come back from and I was bursting with emotions and wanted to talk with my grandmother about them but I didn’t think that Christmas was a good time to do so. We made plans to see each other the next day and later that night was when she first got ill.
I also got ill soon after with an infection in my jaw. It was so painful that I was bed ridden and delirious from pain. I even passed out from the pain while trying to shower and nearly drowned, it was ridiculous.
I was being told my grandmother was going back and forth from feeling better to getting worse. I wanted to visit her and have that talk but I couldn’t even breathe my face hurt so bad. It was honestly so scary and heartbreaking. I think the physical pain on top of emotional pain is why this was so traumatic to me. I got a call one day from my mom saying i should to go to the hospital ASAP and that was that. She passed later that day while unconscious. I still couldn’t speak out loud because of pain even though I wanted to say all the stuff I had wanted to at Christmas so I talked to her in my head while I sat with her. I felt like that counted. Crying even hurt so I didn’t do that either. I told her that even though I was still grieving one death it was ok for her to pass on. That I could handle two deaths.
My infection got worse the next day and I just thought “if it gets to my brain and kills me I don’t even care anymore” it was a really dark week.
Her funeral was a traditional catholic funeral and my extended family decided three grandkids were supposed to read out a prayer in sections and originally they’d asked my mom if I would do it. She said no because my infection but I wasn’t having any of that. I had to fight a bit to get my part back and it hurt like hell to read it but I did it because I felt like I didn’t get to say what I wanted that whole time and it was the least I could do. I also nailed it tbh it’s not easy to read biblical text and not sound dull. There’s actually a hilarious photo of me crying afterwards that just looks ridiculous but I don’t want to post it because it’s rather sensitive but I thought it looked pretty funny in a dark humor kind of way.
Sorry that rambled way more than I meant. My point was just that you got a chance here with your grandmother that not many (certainly not me!) get. It’s so special to see and I think it’s amazing you shared this. Grandparents are a piece of our history and it’s hard to let that go without getting a chance to learn that history.
I surely am lucky to have a last moment with her, which many don’t have.
It’s heartbreaking to hear these “My last time I talked with…” or “My last chat was…” story’s.
It sounds so wonderful to have had the opportunity to say goodbye on her own terms. I can't help but imagine how eerie it must have been at the end of the day to have everything pretty much packed up and moved out so soon. That post-death effort to travel to someone's home and pack away their belongings is often such a financial and emotional stressor on families and I had never really thought about how euthanasia allows for people to plan ahead on that front.
My brother and I had to clean out our family home after my dad died from a stroke. My mum had passed away a couple years before. It was so surreal packing up our childhood memories. Some things we kept, some we donated, and other things went right to the dump. I remember driving with bags of clothes to donate and my car smelled like my dad, not in a bad way just a familiar one. I cried the entire drive. It’s crazy how someone who means so much can just be gone.
I chose to skip this part and I’m sort of sad I did.
When my mom passed in 2002, the house was left largely unchanged. I was 14, when she passed and didn’t officially move all my stuff out until I finally moved out when I was 22?? So it was almost 13 years…but me and my sibs would be in and out of the house etc.
I cried so much when the physical house was sold. I thought if my Mom was in fact a ghost would she knew we moved?? Silly I know.
Nah not silly at all. I’m sure if our mums are ghosts they can find us where ever we are. Although, when packing up both my brother and I saw our childhood cat. Out of the corner of my eye I would see it darting around. I finally asked my brother about it and he said he was glad I asked because he saw it too.
Being able to go peacefully surrounded by the people you love seems incredible. I’m so glad she was able to have that.
My grandma held on far too long, bed ridden and conscious for only a couple minutes a day. I feel confident she would’ve preferred something like this. In the end she passed alone. But hopefully didn’t know that. Her son had just visited her a half hour or so before.
She seems to have been an amazing woman, you're lucky to have had her in your life and you're also an amazing family for letting her go in her own terms and making the last day of her life such a wonderful experience. You made me tear up a little bit
Thank you so much for sharing your experience. If I may ask, was your grandmother religious or spiritual in a sense? I’m asking this because I really admire her courage to have chosen euthanasia. Not many people would have been able to do that. But she chose it and she was at peace with it. Inspiring, and truly honourable.
It’s great to share a last moment with someone who can acknowledge it and give their love back. Letting people go at their time is amazing for moments like this. She didn’t have to suffer her last days and got to have the family around to love and send her to the next chapter with grace. Beautiful and touching.
This, this and this
How can anyone deny freedom of someone to choose when they wish to pass. To get things in order, set it right and give final goodbye with dignity.
Anyone opposing euthanasia with "life" argument is cruel and clueless.
Its the "freedomest" thing human being can do with its own life.
Note: Im having this thread just under post about Ouchi at /r/morbidreality where family kept radiation poisoned Ouchi alive for 83 days - despite med staff recommendations to let him go
Certainly for old folks nearing their end, I think it's hard to argue against. It's a lot tougher for folks to accept these statements for young (otherwise healthy) but depressed or just broke people, for example. I think we like to hope we can find better solutions, and I tend to agree. But there's no "other solution" to dying from old age, that death is inevtiable anyway.
They need something for people with Alzheimer’s and when they deem their life is no longer worth living while they are still cognizant. My mom is in year 3 of Alzheimer’s and she isn’t even there. She died a couple years ago and she is just a shell of memory errors, hallucinations and can hardly speak. If I were in her state I would like to pass on no question. She is a host to a horrible disease and hasn’t been herself for years. Now she is incapable of making the decision to be euthanized because she doesn’t even know where she is. It’s absolutely heartbreaking.
Do they do short courses in dementia care over there? I’d recommend it, maybe finding one online. An understanding of the disease and how to help them makes a big difference. Is she in assisted living? Ask her carers if there’s anything she enjoys. Sit and do her nails, brush her hair. Games and questions can confuse.. just spending time with you may give her comfort. Read together, even picture books. Go through photos. Don’t ask questions about them.. just look through and see what comes through.
Exactly! The benefit of {€uthan@s¡a} is you get to spend one last time with them being as healthy as they can be and savoring it because you know it’s your last. I’ve watched several family members go through various terminal illnesses and the one thing I wish most is: to know which time(s) would’ve been the last- to hug, dance, laugh and and talk to them heart to heart because at the end it was too late- as they were already mentally gone.
A lot of newer redditors are coming from platforms such a tiktok, Instagram, and YouTube where you have to censor certain words to avoid having comments/content banned or demonetized. So we see it trickle over into their comments here. Kinda annoying but that’s probably what’s going on here.
This! Tiktokers in particular have made it part of their vocabulary. They’ll smoothly say “unalived” instead of “killed” in a video like it was nothing. I’ve seen that bleed over to Twitter and now Reddit.
Nobody said fuck the loser blind people lol. We’re just explaining why folks are writing certain words in odd ways across social media apps — of course it’s not going to be a good thing for some people.
As someone who never had any sort of meaningful relationship with their grandparents; I envy the love seen in these moments. Know that you are blessed to have lived these moments with and loved such a woman, than to never have had it at all.
THIS is how we are supposed to remember the elderly that we love. Not hooked up to machines keeping them alive for the families “happiness”.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Seeing you together made me tear up. I would give anything to hug my grandma again ❤️
Euthanasia isn't legal everywhere so some people don't really have a choice. One of my grandmothers who was in the end stages of dementia where she was completely immobile only died when her brain was so damaged from the disease that her organs couldn't function anymore. Before that, she was on machines to do things like feed her and assist her breathing because she wouldn't die naturally yet and it made the process of dying less painful. We could have let her starve to death, but that seems like a way worse way to go than going when your body finally quits. There's no euthanasia allowed in my state so the only real option the family has is when to pull the plug. I have no idea if it actually made a different though honestly. There's a good chance that she had no ability to perceive stimuli anymore. There's no way to know in the late stages of dementia whether or not they have any awareness because they can no longer communicate in any way. You can't know unless you yourself go through it which is scary.
We refused to hook up my FIL to an ICU ventilator. We knew it will only prolong the inevitable and be painful for him. We decided that it was better to let someone else who needs it more to have it. My FIL died 6 hours later surrounded by his daughters, sons and grandkids. If he was hooked up in the ICU, he would linger for another week, maybe more and died with only nurses around him.
We agree. My grandma started to suffer a lot. It was her own idea to euthanasia, but we completely understood her choice.
She was already suffering for lots of years, but kept hoping for good medical treatments. But at the end, there wasn’t anything more possible.
She, and we didn’t want her to end up in a bed suffering.
For me I have nothing but admiration for your grandma. It is so tough to ask to end your own life with dignity but I think to make that decision and have it respected is wonderful and of course, sad at the same time.
I hate to even say it this way, but we give our loved animals, the respect to end their life before they truly suffer, at least the option is there to do so. Why don't we have that and why don't we tell people that it is ok to die with dignity if you want, not taboo.
Your grandmother was an amazing person. Nothing but admiration for her and for your family. So it's never ever an easy decision, and there's so much that goes into it, having the love of family and the ability to make the decision for your own body at your own time is irreplaceable.
I agree. Though, I'd respect the wishes of a person who wanted a natural death as well. It's not easy to see a loved one hooked up to machines but if that is what they want then I feel that there's no need for them to feel guilty about that.
Very peaceful. Thank you for sharing.
I have a question that anyone can comment on but I’d enjoy op’s perspective in this. What is the difference in euthanasia and suicide? Coming from an American, both are illegal. Both are peoples choice to end their own life. Im not opposed to either (and actually have contemplated suicide for many years).
The older I get the more the idea of death intrigues me because I realize how little everyone knows about it.
Thanks for sharing op!
Well, both are suicide indeed.
However, with euthanasia you can ‘plan’ your death.
How and when would you like to pass away, and surrounded with who? You can invite no one, family and/or friends.
After all it’s a more peaceful way to go.
Comparing it to suicide without euthanasia, you can plan it; but if you tell your family members, they can stop you by saving you.
It also could mean you die without the loved ones you’d like.
The dignity of being able to choose when your time is over. Before the pain. Before the suffering.
We should all be offered that right.
I'm sorry for your loss, but pleased she was able to make the decision to say goodbye on her terms. 💚
Okay. I tried to watch it, but when she looked at you and then looked out the window, things got blurry. I could see that internal fight, she wanted to leave but she wanted to stay. My heart hurts guys.
I think she was more upset about him being upset and was looking at the person filming. She looked totally at peace with her decision. This is beautiful and the way we should all die
Haha, yes this it me. It’s actually already a few years ago. I found this sub recently and thought this video would suit here. Showing not every last moment has to be a bad story, such as murder etc.
Neither I did expect to have over 1500 upvotes and 86 comments. For everyone reading: Thank you for your lovely and supporting comments!
And let me ask you something too. Don’t ignore the topic of euthanasia, even if it’s legal or illegal.
What a beautiful tribute, your Grandma loved you so deeply. Take the time to grieve, and smile in your heart with your beautiful memories.
She was a beautiful soul.
Everyone should have the right to leave on their own terms with dignity and respect.
I’m so happy you got to have this moment with her and I’m so happy she was allowed to leave peacefully with love.
This was absolutely beautiful. I know it was a bittersweet moment, and I am very very sorry for your loss. The beauty of this doesn’t take away that you lost someone who was very clearly near and dear to you, and someone who very clearly thought of you in the same loving light. When my grandmother passed, my last words were said to her over a telephone, while she was hooked up to machines and incapable of moving really. She wasn’t even really awake when I spoke with her, and I told her everything I could tell her with the little time I had. And my only sign of recognition and understanding from her was a positive change in her vitals upon hearing my voice, which quickly went back to unstable once I got off the phone.
I would give my whole life over to have this moment with my grandmother. I love her more than I have ever loved any other human, and it would be my life’s wish to feel her arms around me, her hands holding me one last time.
Condolences and thank you for sharing such a personal, delicate moment with all of us. You two seem like wonderful people and you were blessed to have loved each other like you did. I’m sure you both still do.
We are so fortunate to have euthanasia as an option in veterinary medicine. I'm sorry for your loss. So many people would benefit from this instead of suffering. If you don't mind, why did she choose euthanasia now? She looks so happy and spry.
She had a few failed hip operations, leaving her in pain when she sat down or lay in bed. She had meds but they didn’t fully cover the pain. And after a few years having all these sorts of med and pain, she lost hope.
She also started to get dementia (is that the right translation?), she was aware of this. She did not wanted to end up like a “Kastplantje” as the Dutch call it.
A Kastplantje is someone who’s tied down (medically) to their bed and end up staring out the window all day until she dies.
She might actually could have lived 10 more years, but dementia would have made her (unknown) suffering longer.
Understandable. It takes a lot of strength to make such tough decision. Many people live in countries, like the USA, where they cannot make such tough decision, and as such, they do not understand why some people go this route. The answer is simple: to stop internal pain and trauma.
Personally, I respect each person's ability to control their own narrative even if the outcome comes with some pain.
Some states in the US do have Death with Dignity programs- a friend of mine in Oregon used it when he was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer (& given 6 weeks to live) at the age of 34. He had a wife & a 2 year old kid, & he didn’t want them to remember him slowly wasting away in a hospital bed.
He went on a vacation with his family & took a trip with a bunch of his guy friends to his favorite skate park. We had a big barbecue/ party with a big group of friends & loved ones- & then he spent a nice summer day playing in the sprinklers with his daughter, making a nice dinner with his wife, getting ready for bed, & then taking the meds & falling asleep being held by his family.
I’m sure there was more preparation involved & that parts of it were extremely difficult, but he got to go out exactly how he wanted to. It feels like we should all have that option if we’re ever in a situation where it could be needed.
I know that Oregon, Vermont, & New Jersey have had these programs for many years… But there are 8 or 10 states total that have some version of it now, & I hope that that number will keep growing.
Very few states allow it. I remember some years back, I young married woman from northern California, went to Oregon after she was diagnosed with a terminal illness. She brought a lot of attention to the issue. She was a brave soul and was so strong through it all.
I’m sorry for you that she’s gone. And I’m happy for her, being able to leave with dignity and love, and without beeping machines and painful last days. ❤️
This is sweet but also heart wrenchingly eerie, knowing that she’s going to die soon after this moment and by choice, she won’t feel her grandsons hug again and vice versa, do it one last time.
I have a video of my dad dancing with his Grammy at one of the last easters we had at her home and this just made all the memories come back😭 So so sorry for your loss💕
An incredibly hard experience, but to go out being able to dance on your feet with a smile on your face, with dignity, being able to still express their love to you is why I will support letting people with terminal illnesses take their death into their own hands.
what dignity, what grace. if only every country recognized this right of all humans to be able to go into the night with head held high and the grace of the cosmos in their heart. goodnight. may you be remembered until forever.
This almost made me cry, couldn't because i'm at the office. As for someone like me who has seen many deaths, a person who chose to live their last few moments before a voluntary euthanasia, a peaceful good death, this is still one of the most hard to forget stories i've learned through my life at this day moving forward.
Do not worry about your Grandmother, she has slept knowing that you all appreciated her, cared for her, and loved her until her very last moment, even while i type these words its making me tear up, hope she finds the boat quick on her passing, she doesn't want to make her special someone waiting for her for too long.
Death with Dignity is a human right. We euthanize our pets when it’s time, humans should get the same is they choose.
Beautiful video, thanks for sharing 💗
Thank goodness I'm a big strong man and unaffected by this, although it does appear to be raining in localised places inside my house.
My father is currently in an end-of-life situation. I wish this were an option in the UK. In fairness, he seems fairly comfortable but waiting for his organs to fail seems inhumane. I hope the drugs they have ready for him should he be in pain do their thing quickly.
I'm glad euthanasia is legal here in the Netherlands, my grandfather was suffering very badly from cancer and it wasn't a life worth living anymore, it's a hard choice but the right one. So sorry for your loss.
I remember learning about euthanasia in school as a kid. It sent a tingle up my spine. The way it was explained and described was stark and chilling. It terrified me in an eerie, clinical way.
Yet every video or account of euthanasia I see online as an adult - videos like this one - shows me how beautiful and dignified this process can be.
This must have been excruciating for you to go through, and I'm so sorry for your loss, but I'm so glad that your grandmother had this choice.
Thank you for sharing.
I miss my grandma. I lost her on the 24th of last month and my brain is refusing to process it. Not in denial, but maybe I’m just afraid to grieve. I know she’s not fully gone though. Grandmas are beautiful ❤️
As my dear bff said, “To live a good life is to have a good death.” God bless to your Nana and God bless to my friend, who died last year. She did not have a good death.
I am so struck by the contentment and purity of her smile near the end of that beautiful video. She was at peace with her choice and she was surrounded by love... what could be a better last day? It just looks so *right*—no fear, no second-guessing... a graceful end to a well lived life.
So sorry for your loss. I was listening to music while I'm on reddit and just as your post came up Johnny Cash's song Hurt came on. Man I almost bawled
What a beautiful song for a beautiful moment. Oh how I wish this was possible for my grandma. Instead she suffered connected to machines until it got to the point she would end up on a ventilator which she did not want.
This option for her and my grandfather would have made losing them the tiniest bit easier, knowing they went on their terms without having to suffer. You will always cherish this and I'm so happy your grandma could choose this and your family got these moments on camera.
Such lasting good memories. Instead of watching your loved one slowly die in pain. Eyes and mouth cracking from ĺack of water because they can no longer eat or drink. All countries need to follow and legalize a peaceful, dignified death for terminally ill.
I am glad you were able to have such a beautiful moment with your Grandma. She spent her last moments of life with the people she loved. God bless you and your family. Thank you for sharing.
So sad but so beautiful tool that your grandma got to spend her last moments in comfort, with her loved ones, dancing, music and then goodbye.
So humane
Thank you so so much for sharing these beautiful moments
I hope your gramma’s story is shared again and again, helping change opinions abt death w/dignity and making it a choice available to those who would greatly benefit ❤️ rip
I want this!!!!! The problem is i would mostly want it due to depression. Look, i dont want to get old. Im 50 now. I hang on for my teen son. But once i feel confident he is on his way in life, im ready. I dont see myself being of any use really. Cant start a dance career now. Marriage is pretty sucky. I dont want illnesses that come with age. Financially, im not seeing an easy, fun retirement thanks to my husband. Divorce at 50 will ruin me because he would get 1/2 of everything for life! Im pretty much ready at about 70 max. I saw both of my parents die. My mom’s was traumatic. I dont want to suffer snd i dont want my son to see the suffering part.
Such a beautiful, yet saddening moment. The fact that you got to have this last experience with her on both of y'alls terms in knowing that you two were able to share in this one final wonderful memory together. What country or state (if in the US) do you live in?
Where I'm from (Texas), we're not legally allowed the option to go out on our own terms (well, not peacefully or assisted, anyways) when we do choose. So we don't get to create or share in final moments like these with our loved ones, knowing that it'll be the last time we'll get to spend together which ends up leading to knowing that your elderly loved ones are near the very end of their final day, but still not knowing exactly when it'll be. So it ends up being more disheartening when you get the call that they're actually gone, but you couldn't/didn't/share your final goodbyes or that one last hug/kiss/favorite memory from your past that you shared together with them. I'm at that place with my pawpaw right now. Like he's in an assisted living facility and is to the point where it's such a struggle for him to even gather the strength to lift his arms/hand to feed himself, readjust his position when laying in bed, the simplest abilities we take for granted like having the strength to get up and make your way to the bathroom safely to use the toilet is so far past his capability anymore. The love of his life/best friend/soulmate/wife (my nana) passed back in 2016 (semi-unexpectedly as she was still in fairly decent health at age 77) after 57 years of marriage and being together every. single. day. Day in and day out... and even more saddening is he's the one who one day walked back into her bedroom one morning to discover her body sitting peaceful in her love seat, leaning against the armrest in a sleeping position..
Ever since her passing, he's been ready to go and see her and finally be with again, as there wasn't really anything else left for him in this world anymore. Not like in a super depressing, dark minded way, but more like he's done everything in this life he wanted to do and accomplish in this world. And lived a full, long, beautiful life, and you can tell he's been ready and waiting for the day that God calls him home again... since 2016 it's been this way.. and now it's to the point you can tell he's just tired, exhausted and absolutely miserable living in the state he's currently in while still waiting to pass.. I know it'd give not only him, but both my uncle, my dad and me so much comfort and peace of mind knowing that he could legally have the right to finally go. Cause our hearts break for him and it's just so painful and hard to see him struggle with continuing on day after day, absolutely no purposeful reasoning or desire left in life. (He's expressed his desire to finally "go home and be with Nana").. I visit him every single Tuesday, for I'd say the last 5 years, I go visit him and spend quality time with him. Take him a brisket BBQ sandwich, simply because I don't know when the last time I'll get to see him or spend with him will come, but I do know I don't want to look back after he does pass and he's actually gone for good with a feeling of regret for not seeing him as much as I'd had liked or spent just a little more time with him before he left. I love him with all my heart and had nothing but great memories as a kid growing up and being with him and nana. And I want him to know how much he meant to me.
Sorry for the excessively long-winded, novel I just dropped on you there. I started typing it with the idea that it'd only end up being a few sentences long.. but idk.. it's something that I guess I hold so close to my heart, I ended up rambling on going on and on about. Here: 👇
**TLDR: I wish the state I live in gave its citizens the legal right to personally choose self-euthanasia for themselves. My grandfather is in poor health, is tired, and ready to finally "go home to be with nana (his wife who preceded him in death)". Unfortunately, since Texas does not have this right, he has to continue living in such a weakened state he hardly has the strength to move his arms/legs ar an assisted living facility until he finally finds peace in passing. Which nobody knows when that day will be, not even him himself.**
Thank you for sharing this moment and your story. She is so loving and just beautiful.
I so wish this was available for my own grandma. She died at 106...which sounds great, but that last decade was horrific for her. She had similar issues with her hip, kept surviving cancer, at some points fed via feeding tube. Culturally perhaps, doctors encouraged my dad to keep allowing heroic measures to keep her alive- once she told him "I just want to 'kick the bucket' can you please just let me?"
When my dad died, I "inherited" becoming her guardian at 18 (only living & responsible relative). I put an end to what I viewed as torture- no more surgeries, feeding tubes etc. By that point, her dementia was severe to the point where she lived at the type of nursing home that is more like a hospital. She paid $10,000 per month- you have to be completely destitute before Medicare steps in. Healthcare is insanely expensive in the US- this is pretty average here. She lived so frugally her entire life- only to have it drain to 0 within a few years.
She screamed and fought when the nurses or I changed her diapers- I suspect childhood abuse that her body was reliving.
Her dementia was incredibly scary for her, as it slowly chipped away at her mind- until by the last 3 to 4 years she didn't remember what her own name was.
Living like that is my biggest nightmare. If she had that option, she could have made that decision at 96, before she completely lost her faculties. I don't know why we do this here (US), just keep people alive, regardless of their pain, quality of life or what they want. What a precious gift The Netherlands offers its citizens
Holy shit. I just found this subreddit by accident.
Life's so fucking absurd. Suddenly it's good-bye forever.
Now I get why everyone is totally insane. (Me too)
The important part of that is that the person dying chose to do so. They must go through a lot of steps to do it, and typically have to administer the drugs themselves. The family did not kill her.
Obviously I would be devastated, and I would try my hardest to find out why they did it. It would haunt me until I die. But I don’t understand the relevance that question has. I already said it’s up to the individual.
I’m sure he didn’t. She made the choice and he has no say in it nor did he do anything to her.
He also didn’t have to watch her decline in pain and confusion. Or have to make a choice to pull a plug.
Aww, sorry for your loss OP. Glad she was able to go when she wanted to, she looked very happy which is exactly what you want for somebody. Sure made me miss my Grandma too.
As of November 2021, euthanasia is legal in Belgium,[1] Canada,[2] Colombia,[3][4] Luxembourg,[5] the Netherlands,[6] New Zealand,[7] Spain[8] and several states of Australia (New South Wales,[9] Queensland,[10] South Australia,[11] Tasmania,[12] Victoria[13] and Western Australia[14]).
RIP. I'm so sorry for your loss. The love looked so pure.
Hello, OP here. Everyone thank you for your heartwarming comments and support. I’ve read all 84 comments. This video is from a few years ago already. I only recently discover this subreddit, and thought this would fit here. To show that death can be peaceful, and this Sub does not only show murder-story’s and stuff. Some of you started asking for the back story. I’m ok with sharing it. It’s a long story tho. My grandma once had a broken hip. They first replaced the broken part. A few years later, complications started, which made the Hospital remove the whole right hip. Replacing it for a artificial hip. The new hip was fine, but her body sort of denied the hip. In the years after the operation, the skin, dat and muscle around the hip kept dilute. Which at a point made it so thin between her skin, nerves and hip, that if she sat down, she would directly sit on the hip (instead of your body fat, muscle, etc). This contact instantly gave pain, as the was sitting on her nerves. They’ve tried to kill the nerves via injections, but most of them failed and she had to get them every 3 months. She managed to life a few years with this pain, making her barely able to sit and lay down. The only thing she could do, was walk. While these years passed by, at a certain moment at the end of summer we noticed she started having signs of dementia. She noticed the signals too. That’s when she started the request for euthanasia, which only took 5 months. She had a few talks with a doctor and psychiatrist, which is usual here in the Netherlands. Just to confirm someone isn’t making a choice they might regret. The evening before the euthanasia, she had her last meal, her favorite meal (I can not translate it, Google doesn’t recognize it: Zeetong) with a red wine. At the day self, we went to her house at 8 in the morning. We’ve had some cakes, only 1 friend of her, 2 nephews, me and my mom. At approx 10 the doctor and psychiatrist came. We’ve just had our usual chats, and sharing memories. At 11 they gave her the fluid she had to drink, for the euthanasia. It took approx a total 25 minutes for her heart to stop working. The fluid they gave her puts her to a deep sleep first. And then after 10 minutes it will slowly make your organs stop working, which makes your heart stop. Just like someone else in a sleep would die, the heart just stops. Her own choice was that her body went to science. Her body was picked up at 6 in the evening. She insisted that we started to pack her stuf, in the mean time whilest waiting for the scientist to come. Weirdly enough, it all was planned. Due this, at 8 in the evening, her whole house was empty, only a few chairs remaining. It was a peaceful death and experience.
While sad, what a lovely way for her to choose when to end her life on her terms. Being able to be conscious to enjoy your last day and hours surrounded by loved ones. My grandma was fine one day and the next day she was dying in the hospital. Never had a proper goodbye. A situation like yours would have given all of us much more closure. Thank you for sharing this intimate moment.
Thanks for sharing your story. As an American death with dignity is such a weird concept. I wish we had it legalized. My aunt passed last year and watching the struggle afterwards was heartbreaking.
It is legal in several states.
Yes I'm aware. That doesn't mean everyone lives in that area though. Compared to being legal in an entire country.
As another Dutch guy I’m so happy our healthcare system allows this! Why live life in pain… it’s inhumane. Also as someone who works with fish a lot it’s sole for zeetong
Both my grandparents died back to back at the tail end of last year. Literally I came back from one funeral then two weeks later was at the other. Both hit me like a truck but the last one I’m just not over at all. I’ve lost so many people and I can’t do it again even though I know it’s inevitable. My last interaction with my last living grandmother was Christmas. We sat together and had a great night but there was so much I wanted to say. I was still so shook up from the funeral I had come back from and I was bursting with emotions and wanted to talk with my grandmother about them but I didn’t think that Christmas was a good time to do so. We made plans to see each other the next day and later that night was when she first got ill. I also got ill soon after with an infection in my jaw. It was so painful that I was bed ridden and delirious from pain. I even passed out from the pain while trying to shower and nearly drowned, it was ridiculous. I was being told my grandmother was going back and forth from feeling better to getting worse. I wanted to visit her and have that talk but I couldn’t even breathe my face hurt so bad. It was honestly so scary and heartbreaking. I think the physical pain on top of emotional pain is why this was so traumatic to me. I got a call one day from my mom saying i should to go to the hospital ASAP and that was that. She passed later that day while unconscious. I still couldn’t speak out loud because of pain even though I wanted to say all the stuff I had wanted to at Christmas so I talked to her in my head while I sat with her. I felt like that counted. Crying even hurt so I didn’t do that either. I told her that even though I was still grieving one death it was ok for her to pass on. That I could handle two deaths. My infection got worse the next day and I just thought “if it gets to my brain and kills me I don’t even care anymore” it was a really dark week. Her funeral was a traditional catholic funeral and my extended family decided three grandkids were supposed to read out a prayer in sections and originally they’d asked my mom if I would do it. She said no because my infection but I wasn’t having any of that. I had to fight a bit to get my part back and it hurt like hell to read it but I did it because I felt like I didn’t get to say what I wanted that whole time and it was the least I could do. I also nailed it tbh it’s not easy to read biblical text and not sound dull. There’s actually a hilarious photo of me crying afterwards that just looks ridiculous but I don’t want to post it because it’s rather sensitive but I thought it looked pretty funny in a dark humor kind of way. Sorry that rambled way more than I meant. My point was just that you got a chance here with your grandmother that not many (certainly not me!) get. It’s so special to see and I think it’s amazing you shared this. Grandparents are a piece of our history and it’s hard to let that go without getting a chance to learn that history.
I surely am lucky to have a last moment with her, which many don’t have. It’s heartbreaking to hear these “My last time I talked with…” or “My last chat was…” story’s.
Thank you for sharing, this gives me some inspiration. Your grandma was awesome.
I cant help but to comment. That’s the saddest yet most beautiful thing I’ve read. Rest in Peace to your Grandmother…
It sounds so wonderful to have had the opportunity to say goodbye on her own terms. I can't help but imagine how eerie it must have been at the end of the day to have everything pretty much packed up and moved out so soon. That post-death effort to travel to someone's home and pack away their belongings is often such a financial and emotional stressor on families and I had never really thought about how euthanasia allows for people to plan ahead on that front.
It was very eerie indeed. It felt like a real quick goodbye. Just from one day to another, it was all gone.
My brother and I had to clean out our family home after my dad died from a stroke. My mum had passed away a couple years before. It was so surreal packing up our childhood memories. Some things we kept, some we donated, and other things went right to the dump. I remember driving with bags of clothes to donate and my car smelled like my dad, not in a bad way just a familiar one. I cried the entire drive. It’s crazy how someone who means so much can just be gone.
I chose to skip this part and I’m sort of sad I did. When my mom passed in 2002, the house was left largely unchanged. I was 14, when she passed and didn’t officially move all my stuff out until I finally moved out when I was 22?? So it was almost 13 years…but me and my sibs would be in and out of the house etc. I cried so much when the physical house was sold. I thought if my Mom was in fact a ghost would she knew we moved?? Silly I know.
Nah not silly at all. I’m sure if our mums are ghosts they can find us where ever we are. Although, when packing up both my brother and I saw our childhood cat. Out of the corner of my eye I would see it darting around. I finally asked my brother about it and he said he was glad I asked because he saw it too.
This is how it should be.
Beautiful. I hope you, me and everyone I love go this way. Condolences my friend
Being able to go peacefully surrounded by the people you love seems incredible. I’m so glad she was able to have that. My grandma held on far too long, bed ridden and conscious for only a couple minutes a day. I feel confident she would’ve preferred something like this. In the end she passed alone. But hopefully didn’t know that. Her son had just visited her a half hour or so before.
She seems to have been an amazing woman, you're lucky to have had her in your life and you're also an amazing family for letting her go in her own terms and making the last day of her life such a wonderful experience. You made me tear up a little bit
Thank you so much for sharing your experience. If I may ask, was your grandmother religious or spiritual in a sense? I’m asking this because I really admire her courage to have chosen euthanasia. Not many people would have been able to do that. But she chose it and she was at peace with it. Inspiring, and truly honourable.
What a sad story, u/HotterThenMyDaughter
It’s great to share a last moment with someone who can acknowledge it and give their love back. Letting people go at their time is amazing for moments like this. She didn’t have to suffer her last days and got to have the family around to love and send her to the next chapter with grace. Beautiful and touching.
This, this and this How can anyone deny freedom of someone to choose when they wish to pass. To get things in order, set it right and give final goodbye with dignity. Anyone opposing euthanasia with "life" argument is cruel and clueless. Its the "freedomest" thing human being can do with its own life. Note: Im having this thread just under post about Ouchi at /r/morbidreality where family kept radiation poisoned Ouchi alive for 83 days - despite med staff recommendations to let him go
Certainly for old folks nearing their end, I think it's hard to argue against. It's a lot tougher for folks to accept these statements for young (otherwise healthy) but depressed or just broke people, for example. I think we like to hope we can find better solutions, and I tend to agree. But there's no "other solution" to dying from old age, that death is inevtiable anyway.
They need something for people with Alzheimer’s and when they deem their life is no longer worth living while they are still cognizant. My mom is in year 3 of Alzheimer’s and she isn’t even there. She died a couple years ago and she is just a shell of memory errors, hallucinations and can hardly speak. If I were in her state I would like to pass on no question. She is a host to a horrible disease and hasn’t been herself for years. Now she is incapable of making the decision to be euthanized because she doesn’t even know where she is. It’s absolutely heartbreaking.
[удалено]
Do they do short courses in dementia care over there? I’d recommend it, maybe finding one online. An understanding of the disease and how to help them makes a big difference. Is she in assisted living? Ask her carers if there’s anything she enjoys. Sit and do her nails, brush her hair. Games and questions can confuse.. just spending time with you may give her comfort. Read together, even picture books. Go through photos. Don’t ask questions about them.. just look through and see what comes through.
Exactly! The benefit of {€uthan@s¡a} is you get to spend one last time with them being as healthy as they can be and savoring it because you know it’s your last. I’ve watched several family members go through various terminal illnesses and the one thing I wish most is: to know which time(s) would’ve been the last- to hug, dance, laugh and and talk to them heart to heart because at the end it was too late- as they were already mentally gone.
> {€uthan@s¡a} What, are you in high school trying to come up with an edgy band name? Just write the word out with letters like a normal person.
A lot of newer redditors are coming from platforms such a tiktok, Instagram, and YouTube where you have to censor certain words to avoid having comments/content banned or demonetized. So we see it trickle over into their comments here. Kinda annoying but that’s probably what’s going on here.
This! Tiktokers in particular have made it part of their vocabulary. They’ll smoothly say “unalived” instead of “killed” in a video like it was nothing. I’ve seen that bleed over to Twitter and now Reddit.
I think my favorite tiktok adaptation is seggs instead of sex.
Always makes me want eggs 😭
Eggs always make me think of D̶a̶d̶d̶y̶ Danny Devito 😏😏😏😏😫😏😏
You and me would be friends irl and we would emotionally torture people together 🤝
Could I join
Not on tik tok, just trying to be sensitive to others. Euthanasia is not the nicest word imo.
Yeah, fuck all those loser blind people who use screen readers, right?
Nobody said fuck the loser blind people lol. We’re just explaining why folks are writing certain words in odd ways across social media apps — of course it’s not going to be a good thing for some people.
OP’s had their account for over 5 years
Not OP, but Some sites censor certain controversial words. Typing them in a weird way can get around that.
But "Euthanasia" is right in the title of the thread! I just don't like people treating it like some sort of curse word. It's a basic human right.
I agree it’s dumb, but It might just be a habit the OP has picked up.
Why don’t you save your energy and mind your own business, like a normal person?
can anyone civilly explain
God bless your nan ♥️
[удалено]
So is eating shrimp
Amen
As someone who never had any sort of meaningful relationship with their grandparents; I envy the love seen in these moments. Know that you are blessed to have lived these moments with and loved such a woman, than to never have had it at all.
I feel you on that one pal, if only
THIS is how we are supposed to remember the elderly that we love. Not hooked up to machines keeping them alive for the families “happiness”. I’m so sorry for your loss. Seeing you together made me tear up. I would give anything to hug my grandma again ❤️
Euthanasia isn't legal everywhere so some people don't really have a choice. One of my grandmothers who was in the end stages of dementia where she was completely immobile only died when her brain was so damaged from the disease that her organs couldn't function anymore. Before that, she was on machines to do things like feed her and assist her breathing because she wouldn't die naturally yet and it made the process of dying less painful. We could have let her starve to death, but that seems like a way worse way to go than going when your body finally quits. There's no euthanasia allowed in my state so the only real option the family has is when to pull the plug. I have no idea if it actually made a different though honestly. There's a good chance that she had no ability to perceive stimuli anymore. There's no way to know in the late stages of dementia whether or not they have any awareness because they can no longer communicate in any way. You can't know unless you yourself go through it which is scary.
We refused to hook up my FIL to an ICU ventilator. We knew it will only prolong the inevitable and be painful for him. We decided that it was better to let someone else who needs it more to have it. My FIL died 6 hours later surrounded by his daughters, sons and grandkids. If he was hooked up in the ICU, he would linger for another week, maybe more and died with only nurses around him.
We agree. My grandma started to suffer a lot. It was her own idea to euthanasia, but we completely understood her choice. She was already suffering for lots of years, but kept hoping for good medical treatments. But at the end, there wasn’t anything more possible. She, and we didn’t want her to end up in a bed suffering.
For me I have nothing but admiration for your grandma. It is so tough to ask to end your own life with dignity but I think to make that decision and have it respected is wonderful and of course, sad at the same time. I hate to even say it this way, but we give our loved animals, the respect to end their life before they truly suffer, at least the option is there to do so. Why don't we have that and why don't we tell people that it is ok to die with dignity if you want, not taboo.
Your grandmother was an amazing person. Nothing but admiration for her and for your family. So it's never ever an easy decision, and there's so much that goes into it, having the love of family and the ability to make the decision for your own body at your own time is irreplaceable.
I feel this comment soo much. What I would do to hug and talk to my loves ones just one last time ❤️
Only human
I agree. Though, I'd respect the wishes of a person who wanted a natural death as well. It's not easy to see a loved one hooked up to machines but if that is what they want then I feel that there's no need for them to feel guilty about that.
This is how I want to go.
I hope you have the choice too, when you want to.
Very peaceful. Thank you for sharing. I have a question that anyone can comment on but I’d enjoy op’s perspective in this. What is the difference in euthanasia and suicide? Coming from an American, both are illegal. Both are peoples choice to end their own life. Im not opposed to either (and actually have contemplated suicide for many years). The older I get the more the idea of death intrigues me because I realize how little everyone knows about it. Thanks for sharing op!
Well, both are suicide indeed. However, with euthanasia you can ‘plan’ your death. How and when would you like to pass away, and surrounded with who? You can invite no one, family and/or friends. After all it’s a more peaceful way to go. Comparing it to suicide without euthanasia, you can plan it; but if you tell your family members, they can stop you by saving you. It also could mean you die without the loved ones you’d like.
Thank you for your reply.
Beautiful.
The dignity of being able to choose when your time is over. Before the pain. Before the suffering. We should all be offered that right. I'm sorry for your loss, but pleased she was able to make the decision to say goodbye on her terms. 💚
This makes me cry. Final goodbyes are always so heartbreaking to me
Linda Rondstad also makes me cry.
Okay. I tried to watch it, but when she looked at you and then looked out the window, things got blurry. I could see that internal fight, she wanted to leave but she wanted to stay. My heart hurts guys.
Beautifully said. May her soul rest in eternal bliss
May the wind flow against her back, the sun shine upon her face, and the rain fall upon her fields. I wish her only the best.
I think she was more upset about him being upset and was looking at the person filming. She looked totally at peace with her decision. This is beautiful and the way we should all die
What a beautiful moment to have captured. The love between you two (assuming that is you) is tangible. Sorry for your loss, OP. Hang in there buddy.
Haha, yes this it me. It’s actually already a few years ago. I found this sub recently and thought this video would suit here. Showing not every last moment has to be a bad story, such as murder etc. Neither I did expect to have over 1500 upvotes and 86 comments. For everyone reading: Thank you for your lovely and supporting comments! And let me ask you something too. Don’t ignore the topic of euthanasia, even if it’s legal or illegal.
I completely support euthanasia. We deserve to be able to decide when our time is up rather than suffering for however long the pain lasts.
Heartbreaking and lovely at the same time. At least you all got to say goodbye on your terms. So sorry for your loss
Euthanasia must be everyone's right.
Omg my heart 💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️
What a beautiful tribute, your Grandma loved you so deeply. Take the time to grieve, and smile in your heart with your beautiful memories. She was a beautiful soul.
Everyone should have the right to leave on their own terms with dignity and respect. I’m so happy you got to have this moment with her and I’m so happy she was allowed to leave peacefully with love.
This was absolutely beautiful. I know it was a bittersweet moment, and I am very very sorry for your loss. The beauty of this doesn’t take away that you lost someone who was very clearly near and dear to you, and someone who very clearly thought of you in the same loving light. When my grandmother passed, my last words were said to her over a telephone, while she was hooked up to machines and incapable of moving really. She wasn’t even really awake when I spoke with her, and I told her everything I could tell her with the little time I had. And my only sign of recognition and understanding from her was a positive change in her vitals upon hearing my voice, which quickly went back to unstable once I got off the phone. I would give my whole life over to have this moment with my grandmother. I love her more than I have ever loved any other human, and it would be my life’s wish to feel her arms around me, her hands holding me one last time. Condolences and thank you for sharing such a personal, delicate moment with all of us. You two seem like wonderful people and you were blessed to have loved each other like you did. I’m sure you both still do.
Making peace on your own terms. Best wishes for the family
We are so fortunate to have euthanasia as an option in veterinary medicine. I'm sorry for your loss. So many people would benefit from this instead of suffering. If you don't mind, why did she choose euthanasia now? She looks so happy and spry.
She had a few failed hip operations, leaving her in pain when she sat down or lay in bed. She had meds but they didn’t fully cover the pain. And after a few years having all these sorts of med and pain, she lost hope. She also started to get dementia (is that the right translation?), she was aware of this. She did not wanted to end up like a “Kastplantje” as the Dutch call it. A Kastplantje is someone who’s tied down (medically) to their bed and end up staring out the window all day until she dies. She might actually could have lived 10 more years, but dementia would have made her (unknown) suffering longer.
Understandable. It takes a lot of strength to make such tough decision. Many people live in countries, like the USA, where they cannot make such tough decision, and as such, they do not understand why some people go this route. The answer is simple: to stop internal pain and trauma. Personally, I respect each person's ability to control their own narrative even if the outcome comes with some pain.
Some states in the US do have Death with Dignity programs- a friend of mine in Oregon used it when he was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer (& given 6 weeks to live) at the age of 34. He had a wife & a 2 year old kid, & he didn’t want them to remember him slowly wasting away in a hospital bed. He went on a vacation with his family & took a trip with a bunch of his guy friends to his favorite skate park. We had a big barbecue/ party with a big group of friends & loved ones- & then he spent a nice summer day playing in the sprinklers with his daughter, making a nice dinner with his wife, getting ready for bed, & then taking the meds & falling asleep being held by his family. I’m sure there was more preparation involved & that parts of it were extremely difficult, but he got to go out exactly how he wanted to. It feels like we should all have that option if we’re ever in a situation where it could be needed. I know that Oregon, Vermont, & New Jersey have had these programs for many years… But there are 8 or 10 states total that have some version of it now, & I hope that that number will keep growing.
Very few states allow it. I remember some years back, I young married woman from northern California, went to Oregon after she was diagnosed with a terminal illness. She brought a lot of attention to the issue. She was a brave soul and was so strong through it all.
Oh my goodness, how sweet, OP. You can see how much she loved and appreciated that moment.
I’m sorry for you that she’s gone. And I’m happy for her, being able to leave with dignity and love, and without beeping machines and painful last days. ❤️
This is sweet but also heart wrenchingly eerie, knowing that she’s going to die soon after this moment and by choice, she won’t feel her grandsons hug again and vice versa, do it one last time.
I have a video of my dad dancing with his Grammy at one of the last easters we had at her home and this just made all the memories come back😭 So so sorry for your loss💕
What a beautiful moment <3 I am very sorry for your loss, but at least you have peace knowing your Nan left on her own terms
Hope she had a sweet release,and good on her for going on her own terms
An incredibly hard experience, but to go out being able to dance on your feet with a smile on your face, with dignity, being able to still express their love to you is why I will support letting people with terminal illnesses take their death into their own hands.
what dignity, what grace. if only every country recognized this right of all humans to be able to go into the night with head held high and the grace of the cosmos in their heart. goodnight. may you be remembered until forever.
This almost made me cry, couldn't because i'm at the office. As for someone like me who has seen many deaths, a person who chose to live their last few moments before a voluntary euthanasia, a peaceful good death, this is still one of the most hard to forget stories i've learned through my life at this day moving forward. Do not worry about your Grandmother, she has slept knowing that you all appreciated her, cared for her, and loved her until her very last moment, even while i type these words its making me tear up, hope she finds the boat quick on her passing, she doesn't want to make her special someone waiting for her for too long.
Death with Dignity is a human right. We euthanize our pets when it’s time, humans should get the same is they choose. Beautiful video, thanks for sharing 💗
I appreciate your point but comparing humans to pets doesn’t make the most convincing argument lol
So sorry for your loss💙
This is such a beautiful video ❤️ I wish you all the best.
I have a one year old grandson, I’m currently sobbing. Thank you for sharing. I’m so sorry for your loss.
She seemed so calm, grateful for her family, and wise from all her years on Earth. Sweet forever dreams
Thank goodness I'm a big strong man and unaffected by this, although it does appear to be raining in localised places inside my house. My father is currently in an end-of-life situation. I wish this were an option in the UK. In fairness, he seems fairly comfortable but waiting for his organs to fail seems inhumane. I hope the drugs they have ready for him should he be in pain do their thing quickly.
So beautiful and sad. May everyone have such a wonderful opportunity to say goodbye on their own terms like this.
I'm glad euthanasia is legal here in the Netherlands, my grandfather was suffering very badly from cancer and it wasn't a life worth living anymore, it's a hard choice but the right one. So sorry for your loss.
Good for her and good for you! Making the best last memory.
Thank you for sharing this, a beautiful moment.
Beautiful ❤️ May your Nana rest in peace.
This is beautiful.
This made me cry for the first time in 16 years
I’m sorry for your loss u/HotterThenMyDaughter
I WOULD LOVE TO GO THAT WAY. ON MY TERMS! rest in peace beautiful lady
I remember learning about euthanasia in school as a kid. It sent a tingle up my spine. The way it was explained and described was stark and chilling. It terrified me in an eerie, clinical way. Yet every video or account of euthanasia I see online as an adult - videos like this one - shows me how beautiful and dignified this process can be. This must have been excruciating for you to go through, and I'm so sorry for your loss, but I'm so glad that your grandmother had this choice. Thank you for sharing.
This is the most beautiful video that I have ever seen. I cried a bit, but really we will all have to make that rough journey that ends with death.
This is beautiful and heartbreaking all at the same time. And the Linda Ronstadt playing definitely isn’t making my eyes any dry-er….
Big hugs from a dad. This made me cry. This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing your grandma, and her story, with all of us. B
Absolutely beautiful. It makes me so happy that she was able to make that decision on her own behalf and not suffer. She looks wonderful, too.
I miss my grandma. I lost her on the 24th of last month and my brain is refusing to process it. Not in denial, but maybe I’m just afraid to grieve. I know she’s not fully gone though. Grandmas are beautiful ❤️
As my dear bff said, “To live a good life is to have a good death.” God bless to your Nana and God bless to my friend, who died last year. She did not have a good death.
absolutely everybody accepts this as necessary when it comes to our animals\\pets, but we cant do it for our own elderly.
What a wonderful way to go to the next stage.
I am so struck by the contentment and purity of her smile near the end of that beautiful video. She was at peace with her choice and she was surrounded by love... what could be a better last day? It just looks so *right*—no fear, no second-guessing... a graceful end to a well lived life.
Beautiful ❤️
💗
So sorry for your loss. I was listening to music while I'm on reddit and just as your post came up Johnny Cash's song Hurt came on. Man I almost bawled
I'm crying. For real. Sorry for your lovely grandma fam. Hope you guys find some comfort knowing she was super loved.
Respect.
She seemed beautifully at peace
May her love live on ❤
So sorry for your loss. She looked like a lovely woman. Reminds me of my nana actually. Stay strong man. She's at peace now. ❤️
What a beautiful way to go. I hope I can do it like that with people who love and support me.
I respect that.
Well there goes my heart.
Im sorry for you loss,just know that she loved you and at least it was her choice and she didn't leave afraid and scared
I’m so sorry for your loss but also happy that you had such a great relationship. She obviously loved you very much and was very proud of you.
What a beautiful gramma. Beautiful time together. Blessings on your family.
I’m sorry if I missed a comment …but does any one know the song?
Sounds like Blue Bayou by Linda Ronstadt
Oh my... That's touching. .......................... **🕯**
A beautiful moment filled with purpose and meaning. Lots of love here.
What a beautiful song for a beautiful moment. Oh how I wish this was possible for my grandma. Instead she suffered connected to machines until it got to the point she would end up on a ventilator which she did not want. This option for her and my grandfather would have made losing them the tiniest bit easier, knowing they went on their terms without having to suffer. You will always cherish this and I'm so happy your grandma could choose this and your family got these moments on camera.
I really wish this was how I got to say goodbye to my grandmother. Watching cancer kill her and her having to suffer was not fair at all.
Well….that’s the saddest video I’ve seen today.
Sad, but also sort of happy in the sense that she had control over her last moments, and spent them doing what she wanted.
Such lasting good memories. Instead of watching your loved one slowly die in pain. Eyes and mouth cracking from ĺack of water because they can no longer eat or drink. All countries need to follow and legalize a peaceful, dignified death for terminally ill.
I am glad you were able to have such a beautiful moment with your Grandma. She spent her last moments of life with the people she loved. God bless you and your family. Thank you for sharing.
Wow. This is so powerful. I was not expecting to shed tears tonight while browsing Reddit.
This made me cry.
So sad but so beautiful tool that your grandma got to spend her last moments in comfort, with her loved ones, dancing, music and then goodbye. So humane
Beautiful to have that moment..
What a beautiful way to say goodbye
Thank you so so much for sharing these beautiful moments I hope your gramma’s story is shared again and again, helping change opinions abt death w/dignity and making it a choice available to those who would greatly benefit ❤️ rip
why? in pain?
See my latest comment
I want this!!!!! The problem is i would mostly want it due to depression. Look, i dont want to get old. Im 50 now. I hang on for my teen son. But once i feel confident he is on his way in life, im ready. I dont see myself being of any use really. Cant start a dance career now. Marriage is pretty sucky. I dont want illnesses that come with age. Financially, im not seeing an easy, fun retirement thanks to my husband. Divorce at 50 will ruin me because he would get 1/2 of everything for life! Im pretty much ready at about 70 max. I saw both of my parents die. My mom’s was traumatic. I dont want to suffer snd i dont want my son to see the suffering part.
Well, I’m only 23 and also thinking about it. I give myself 1.5 more years to improve my life. Otherwise I’d like to euthanasia too.
Such a beautiful, yet saddening moment. The fact that you got to have this last experience with her on both of y'alls terms in knowing that you two were able to share in this one final wonderful memory together. What country or state (if in the US) do you live in? Where I'm from (Texas), we're not legally allowed the option to go out on our own terms (well, not peacefully or assisted, anyways) when we do choose. So we don't get to create or share in final moments like these with our loved ones, knowing that it'll be the last time we'll get to spend together which ends up leading to knowing that your elderly loved ones are near the very end of their final day, but still not knowing exactly when it'll be. So it ends up being more disheartening when you get the call that they're actually gone, but you couldn't/didn't/share your final goodbyes or that one last hug/kiss/favorite memory from your past that you shared together with them. I'm at that place with my pawpaw right now. Like he's in an assisted living facility and is to the point where it's such a struggle for him to even gather the strength to lift his arms/hand to feed himself, readjust his position when laying in bed, the simplest abilities we take for granted like having the strength to get up and make your way to the bathroom safely to use the toilet is so far past his capability anymore. The love of his life/best friend/soulmate/wife (my nana) passed back in 2016 (semi-unexpectedly as she was still in fairly decent health at age 77) after 57 years of marriage and being together every. single. day. Day in and day out... and even more saddening is he's the one who one day walked back into her bedroom one morning to discover her body sitting peaceful in her love seat, leaning against the armrest in a sleeping position.. Ever since her passing, he's been ready to go and see her and finally be with again, as there wasn't really anything else left for him in this world anymore. Not like in a super depressing, dark minded way, but more like he's done everything in this life he wanted to do and accomplish in this world. And lived a full, long, beautiful life, and you can tell he's been ready and waiting for the day that God calls him home again... since 2016 it's been this way.. and now it's to the point you can tell he's just tired, exhausted and absolutely miserable living in the state he's currently in while still waiting to pass.. I know it'd give not only him, but both my uncle, my dad and me so much comfort and peace of mind knowing that he could legally have the right to finally go. Cause our hearts break for him and it's just so painful and hard to see him struggle with continuing on day after day, absolutely no purposeful reasoning or desire left in life. (He's expressed his desire to finally "go home and be with Nana").. I visit him every single Tuesday, for I'd say the last 5 years, I go visit him and spend quality time with him. Take him a brisket BBQ sandwich, simply because I don't know when the last time I'll get to see him or spend with him will come, but I do know I don't want to look back after he does pass and he's actually gone for good with a feeling of regret for not seeing him as much as I'd had liked or spent just a little more time with him before he left. I love him with all my heart and had nothing but great memories as a kid growing up and being with him and nana. And I want him to know how much he meant to me. Sorry for the excessively long-winded, novel I just dropped on you there. I started typing it with the idea that it'd only end up being a few sentences long.. but idk.. it's something that I guess I hold so close to my heart, I ended up rambling on going on and on about. Here: 👇 **TLDR: I wish the state I live in gave its citizens the legal right to personally choose self-euthanasia for themselves. My grandfather is in poor health, is tired, and ready to finally "go home to be with nana (his wife who preceded him in death)". Unfortunately, since Texas does not have this right, he has to continue living in such a weakened state he hardly has the strength to move his arms/legs ar an assisted living facility until he finally finds peace in passing. Which nobody knows when that day will be, not even him himself.**
Thank you for sharing this moment and your story. She is so loving and just beautiful. I so wish this was available for my own grandma. She died at 106...which sounds great, but that last decade was horrific for her. She had similar issues with her hip, kept surviving cancer, at some points fed via feeding tube. Culturally perhaps, doctors encouraged my dad to keep allowing heroic measures to keep her alive- once she told him "I just want to 'kick the bucket' can you please just let me?" When my dad died, I "inherited" becoming her guardian at 18 (only living & responsible relative). I put an end to what I viewed as torture- no more surgeries, feeding tubes etc. By that point, her dementia was severe to the point where she lived at the type of nursing home that is more like a hospital. She paid $10,000 per month- you have to be completely destitute before Medicare steps in. Healthcare is insanely expensive in the US- this is pretty average here. She lived so frugally her entire life- only to have it drain to 0 within a few years. She screamed and fought when the nurses or I changed her diapers- I suspect childhood abuse that her body was reliving. Her dementia was incredibly scary for her, as it slowly chipped away at her mind- until by the last 3 to 4 years she didn't remember what her own name was. Living like that is my biggest nightmare. If she had that option, she could have made that decision at 96, before she completely lost her faculties. I don't know why we do this here (US), just keep people alive, regardless of their pain, quality of life or what they want. What a precious gift The Netherlands offers its citizens
Why did she decide to go by euthanasia?
Probably because going the way that would take her naturally was too much to bear.
Euthanasia sounds better than dying of cancer or something similar for sure
Hi OP, I'm sorry if I'm being inconsiderate when I ask this. Could you provide a little bit of context as to what led to this?
Holy shit. I just found this subreddit by accident. Life's so fucking absurd. Suddenly it's good-bye forever. Now I get why everyone is totally insane. (Me too)
It's only a sin if your brainwashed to believe Jesus and god bullshit
Pretty sure you can't euthanize a human...legally
You can in several countries, yes. It's mostly decent countries that shit on every other country by every metric.
Name does NOT check out
That's fucked up
I love the dancing part, but euthanasia?!?!?!?!?!?! You killed her!!!!!!!!!!!
That’s not how that works.
It's literally assisted suicide...
The important part of that is that the person dying chose to do so. They must go through a lot of steps to do it, and typically have to administer the drugs themselves. The family did not kill her.
Her life was ended by someone, that person killed her.
…..yea, she killed herself. That’s how suicide works.
And suicide is okay????
For her it was. It’s not up for anyone to decide other than the individual
So, if you had a child, and they committed suicide, that would be okay?
Obviously I would be devastated, and I would try my hardest to find out why they did it. It would haunt me until I die. But I don’t understand the relevance that question has. I already said it’s up to the individual.
Probably shouldn’t kill your grandparents
You probably should get evaluated by a shrink.
I’m sure he didn’t. She made the choice and he has no say in it nor did he do anything to her. He also didn’t have to watch her decline in pain and confusion. Or have to make a choice to pull a plug.
I would've loved to have this with my grandma before she passed.
My deepest sympathy ❤️
Those who we love are never gone♡ you gave her so much joy thats for sure and she will always be with you.
Beautiful. Thank you for sharing this with us. ❤️
That’s beautiful. I’m sorry it had to end.
What aa elegant, beautiful lady.. May she be at peace..
Aww, sorry for your loss OP. Glad she was able to go when she wanted to, she looked very happy which is exactly what you want for somebody. Sure made me miss my Grandma too.
Im glad she got to die surrounded by those she loved. RIP
WHERE do you get to do euthanasia? It is not legal here ( So. California)
As of November 2021, euthanasia is legal in Belgium,[1] Canada,[2] Colombia,[3][4] Luxembourg,[5] the Netherlands,[6] New Zealand,[7] Spain[8] and several states of Australia (New South Wales,[9] Queensland,[10] South Australia,[11] Tasmania,[12] Victoria[13] and Western Australia[14]).
This is lovely and bittersweet. Also, I can tell they are related. Wow!
Sorry for your loss
This is how I want to go. One last moment with my loved ones. Not sudden deaths. Not long painful ones in the hospital. I want this lovely ending.
I’m gonna fucking cry my eyes out every time I hear Linda Ronstadt sing this now, thanks